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eternaldarkness55 · 5 years

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The Little Mermaid of King’s Landing

(StoryInfo)(After Ariel became human Gabriela wanted that too plus her voice and hearing. Tritan gives her what she wants. After he does she ends up in King's Landing where she is adopted by Bronn. Joffrey finds out what she is and becomes obsessed with her both hatefully and lustfully. Gabriela/The Hound)(If you think this story is disrespectful just because I made a deaf character not deaf anymore then you need to look in the mirror at yourself before you start insulting and screaming at me and my story. This is not disrespectful get over yourselves if you think it is.)

Note 1: This story is inspired by Hunchback of Notre Dame and there will be some singing. But only a tiny bite.

Note 2: The Hound is no longer afraid of fire

Note 3: Women are allowed to join the Night's Watch

Start of story

It happened so quickly Gabriella was begging Tritan in sign language for him to turn her human and give her hearing and voice. Then suddenly she was standing on the beach of King's Landing wearing a long pink sparkly sleeveless dress. She could hear the beautiful sounds of the waves and the birds. Her heart filled with happiness. With this new life she could finally sing, play instruments, and dance like she always dreamed. She started singing " Daring to Dance. The same song she sang with Ariel once. Someone must have heard her beautiful voice because soon a man walked over to her.

Bronn: Hello miss, do you need any help? I will be more then happy to help you.

Gabriella: Well I have no home, my parents died when I was nine. I been on my own since then. I ran away from the place I once called home.

Bronn: Well I always wanted a daughter. Come live with me in the castle. I will keep you safe and protect you. Be my daughter and you will have a home and family.(Held out his hand)

Gabriella smiled, took his hand, and followed him. Two years went by Gabriella was now Bronn's daughter and Tyrion was her best friend. She was very close to Podrick too She loved her bastard name because it matched who she was and where she came from. Gabriella still loved swimming. Joffrey was her enemy he was always sneering at her. But what she didn't know is that Joffrey both wanted to kill her and sleep with her and make her his wife. Something else she had no clue about was Joffrey's bodyguard Sander Clegane was madly in love with her. But she had no idea who that was. She was about to leave the castle to go sing and play the harp for the orphans like she did every Saturday when she ran into someone.

Gabriella: I'm so sorry sir

The Hound: It's no problem miss, I'm Sander

Gabriella: Gabriella

The Hound: Beautiful, so much better then Sander

Gabriella blushed

Joffrey: Come dog, leave the freak to her freak work(Walked over)

Gabriella walked away with some soldiers. When she was done she went down to her favorite spot like she always did when she was done. As she enjoyed the sandy beach and the breeze she practiced her water skills. But she was unaware that Joffrey was stalking and watching her. When she returned to the castle and her room Bronn, Tyrion, and Podrick were there with worried expressions on their faces.

Gabriella: What's going on?(Shut the door)

Tyrion: The Hound told us he over heard Joffrey telling his soldiers that he saw you using your water magic. Joffrey knows you're a mermaid and he wants to kill you. I arranged you to join the Night's Watch with Podrick. He'll keep you safe and so will the Night's Watch. Your father and I will miss you so much but this is the way it has to be. This is the only way to keep you safe. And I'm sorry but there's no time for goodbye's. Come, I'll show you and Podrick the secret passage out of the castle. I already have horses and supplies ready for you.

Tyrion quickly grabbed her hand and ran with Podrick and Bronn hot on their trail. Tyrion opened the secret passage and they all ran in. Once they were out of the castle Gabriella saw the horses and her and Podrick got on.

Bronn: Remember, you're a sellswords daughter. Show them what I taught you. Show those boys what a real fighter can do. And remember I love you and I'm always with you. And please show Podrick how to fight, I never seen someone so terrible.

Bronn made the horses take off when Gabriella and Podrick arrived and walked into the yard they saw three boys training.

Grenn: My word(Gasped as he saw Gabriella first)

The three men turned around and saw Allister Throne walking up with a breath-taking woman and a boy.

Throne: Tell them who you two are

Gabriella: I'm Gabriella Waters daughter of a sellsword man in King's Landing.

Podrick: I'm Podrick Payne, I was a squire for Tyrion Lannister

Throne: If you're a sellswords daughter you must be an amazing fighter. So let's see what the boy can do first. Rast, see what the boy can do.

Podrick and Rast fought but it didn't take long for Rast to knock him down every time.

Throne: Well sellswords daughter let's see if you can defend your friend. All four of you get in there.

Jon, Grenn, and Pyp joined Rast and went at Gabriella but she beat them every time even Jon.

Throne: Okay that's enough, so it seems we have another very skilled bastard at Castle Black. I have a feeling you'll be a ranger.

He walked away

Gabriella: Well fought all of you(Smiled)

Rast: Piss off bitch!

He walked away as Sam walked over to her and Podrick.

Sam: Did he hurt you?(Asked Podrick)

Podrick: I'm okay

Sam: You were amazing, I'm Sam Tarly(Said to Gabriella)

Gabriella: Thank you Sam, I'm Gabriella Waters and this is my friend Podrick Payne.

Gabriella and Podrick became friends with Sam, Jon, Grenn, and Pyp right away. They also became friends with Edd Tollett when he arrived that day. Gabriella was made a ranger and Podrick was made a steward. Meanwhile in King's Landing in Joffrey's room.

Joffrey: Why do I still desire her? She's a filthy mermaid!(Said to himself)

Joffrey: Tell me why I see her dancing there? Why her brown eyes still scorch my soul? I feel her, I see her. The sun caught in her black hair Is blazing me out of all control. Like fire hellfire, this fire in my skin. Why do I feel this burning desire? It's not my fault I'm not to blame. It is the mermaid the sea witch who sent this flame. It's not my fault. Protect me, don't let this siren cast her spell. Don't let her fire sear my flesh and bone. Destroy Gabriella and let her taste the fires of hell. Or else let her be mine and mine alone. Hellfire dark fire now mermaid it's your turn. Choose me or your pyre. Be mine or you will burn. Have mercy on her, have mercy on me. But she will be mine or she will burn.(Sang)

The Mountain: Your grace, the mermaid has escaped!(Ran in)

Joffrey: What?!

The Mountain: She's no where in the castle or King's Landing. She's gone!

Joffrey: How?! Never mind get out! I'll find her, I'll find her even if I have to burn down all of Westros!

The Mountain ran out of the room. After dark at Castle Black Gabriella took off on a horse while everyone was sleeping. She didn't care about being safe if her dad and Tyrion were not. She left Podrick a note explaining that she's going to get somewhere safe with her father and Tyrion or die trying. She arrived in the city of King's Landing the next night to the sight of Joffrey harassing a man and his wife by their house. She spotted soldiers by him including Sander who was holding a lite torch.

Joffrey: I found this book on mermaids in your house. So you two like mermaids huh? Have you been harboring the King's Landing mermaid?

The man: We are innocent, we know nothing about this King's Landing mermaid.(Said truthfully as he pushed his wife behind him)

Joffrey: Were going to burn down your house unless you tell us where she can be found.

The women: We don't know-

Joffrey: Burn it dog! Did you hear me dog? I gave you an order

The Hound held the torch that glowed like Gabriella's beautiful smile staring at the fire.

The Hound: I don't know how burning down this house will help us find her

Joffrey: Are you disobeying an order dog?

The Hound knew this was the moment he must make a choice.

Joffrey: It's that girl isn't it? She's gotten to you hasn't she?

The Hound: What girl?

Joffrey: You know very well who I mean. I saw the way you two looked at each other. You would throw away a promising position for that? Life with me or death with her?!

The Hound heard Gabriella's voice in his head. But had no idea she was watching him. He blew out the fire and threw the torch on the ground. He had no armor on that day so when Joffrey stabbed him in chest he cried in pain and fell to his knees.

Joffrey: Kill him!

Gabriella: No!(Yelled as she ran over and helped Sander up)

She and The Hound took off running

Joffrey: Don't just stand there shoot them! I don't care if you have to burn down the whole city!

Some of the soldiers took off after them

Joffrey: Hunt down the mermaid Gabriella don't let her flee and vanish in the night. These are the flames of Gabriella. While she's free our torches will burn bright.(Sang)

Bronn: Fire fire smoke and flame, Gabriella are you safe? In the dark I call your name. Is that all I can do? She's out there and I don't know where. I got to find her!(Sang from inside his cell)

Joffrey: Why do I long for Gabriella? Why do I hear her voice inside my head? I'm here to expose that pretty head. Where is the mermaid Gabriella?(Sang)

Gabriella and The Hound lost the soldiers by the time they arrived at a room in an inn in Mole's Town. She gently laid The Hound on the bed who was unconscious.

Gabriella: Sander, Sander(Gently shook him)

The Hound: Gabriella?(Slowly woke up)

Gabriella: Shh, try not to speak. I need to go get some stuff for your wound(Said gently)

The Hound: Gabriella come back!(Yelled as she ran out of the room)

The Hound's mind was on the pain but also on Gabriella and the danger she's in. As Gabriella grabbed some supplies from one of the maids she made her way back to their room. But on her way back she ran into someone.

Gabriella: Oh my god Podrick!

Podrick: Thank goodness I found you! Don't worry I'm not taking you back to the wall. I'm going to help you!(Gripping her shoulders)

Gabriella: How did you find me?!

Podrick: I left the wall tonight, the minute I arrived in Mole's Town I saw you arrive.

Gabriella: Thank you, yes I do need your help

She took her supplies and Podrick to her room

Podrick: The Hound!

Gabriella: He's helping, he disobeyed Joffrey's orders to burn an innocent couples house. He's injured and needs to recover.

Podrick: Okay, I'll help you heal him

Gabriella: Thank you, but you'll be healing him yourself at the moment.(Squeezed Podrick's hands)

Podrick: What?! No! Where are you going?!

Gabriella: To get a ship with the money my father gave me. As soon as his wound is good enough cleaned and bandaged were sailing to Meereen.

Podrick: Meereen?!

Gabriella: Yes, you heard of Daenerys Targaryen?

Podrick: Yes

Gabriella: She was born and raised in a place surrounded by the sea. She's one of the people in the world that loves the sea and feels one with it. I'm positive she loves mer people she'll understand me. Plus she has armies and dragons. She helps us, and in return we'll give King's Landing to It's rightful ruler, a Targaryen. We are giving Daenerys Targaryen King's Landing like she wants and deserves. We are ending all the Lannister's except for Tyrion of course.

Podrick: What about Tyrion? Doesn't he deserve King's Landing?

Gabriella: He doesn't want it, he rather be Hand of the King again. Or in this case queen. He told me himself. Not harming Tyrion and making him her hand will be one of my terms when I talk with her.

She took off Podrick cleaned The Hound's wound and put gaze on it. When Gabriella returned they left immediately. When they arrived on the Meereen beach they were surrounded by Unsullied men.

Missandei: Welcome to Meereen, I assume you three are here to have words with our queen?

Gabriella: Mainly me but yes, I have favors and offers for your queen. Ones that will help her get the Iron Throne.

Missandei: She will be delighted to hear that. But first would you mind handing over your weapons?

Gabriella: Of course

The Unsullied took her, The Hound's, and Podrick's swords. The Unsullied took them to the castle and into the throne room where Daenerys was waiting.

Daenerys: Thank you for meeting with me, please state your business.

Gabriella: I'm here to help you get the Iron Throne. But I have conditions and favors first.

Daenerys: That's fair, who are you and what are your favors and conditions?

Gabriella: My name is Gabriella Waters, I am a daughter of a sellsword man in King's Landing. My father is named Bronn and he is Tyrion Lannister's sellsword. Because of that we live in the castle. Or I should say use to live in the castle. That little shit Joffrey has hated me ever since he met me. But the minute he found out what I am he wanted me dead. My father sent me away to keep me safe. I don't know if my father is alive but if he is he is Joffrey's prisoner. Help me defeat and kill the Lannister's, free my father, and let me and my father move back into the castle and It's yours.

Daenerys: Who are you that would make that boy hate you?

Gabriella: A mermaid

Daenerys: A mermaid really? Prove it

Gabriella turned into her mermaid form then turned back into human.

Daenerys: Very cool, any other favors and conditions?

Gabriella: You must let my two friends here move back into the castle as well.

Daenerys: And who are you two?

The Hound: My names Sander Clegane. I was the personal bodyguard to that little cunt. I finally got away when Gabriella saved me. Joffrey wanted me to burn down an innocent couple's house. I refused and he stabbed me. The minute I met Gabriella I vowed in my heart that I would be her personal bodyguard instead.

Daenerys: You swear you're loyal to her and not the Lannister's?

The Hound: I swear with all my heart that I'm loyal to Gabriella and that I always hated the Lannister's.

Daenerys: Okay I believe you, and what about you boy?

Podrick: I'm Podrick Payne, I was Tyrion Lannister's steward.

Gabriella: That brings me to another favor and condition. Tyrion Lannister is the one Lannister you must leave alone. And you must accept him as your hand. He is a good man and nothing like his family. He is my best friend. When this is all over Pod wishes to be Tyrion's steward once again.

Daenerys: Okay I believe you three about everything. I accept your conditions and will give you everything you three ask for. If your father is still alive we will free him. We will leave tomorrow night. For now I'll have Grey Worm show you to your rooms and we'll have supper sent to your rooms.

Once Gabriella, The Hound, and Podrick were brought to their rooms and they ate Gabriella went to The Hound's room and knocked on the door. The Hound opened the door.

Gabriella: Will you please take a walk on the beach with me?

The Hound: Of course

Once they got to the beach she grabbed his right hand.

Gabriella: You took a terrible risk disobeying Joffrey and trying to help me. I haven't said it yet, but I'm grateful.

The Hound: There was one thing I lied to Daenerys about. I don't want to be your bodyguard. I want to be your husband. I'll be Tyrion's personal bodyguard instead. I love you Gabriella Waters.

She jumped on him smashing her lips against his and wrapping her arms around his neck.

Joffrey: Very touching, I been on your trail since you left Mole's Town. I was just waiting for you to come outside. I knew you wouldn't be able to resist the beach or taking your dog out for a moonlight walk. It seems Mr Payne took a moonlight walk before you came out here.(standing there with ten King's Landing soldiers)

Two soldiers walked out with Podrick who was struggling to get free from their grips but failing.

Gabriella: Let him go you little shit!(Cried angrily)

Joffrey: There will be a bonfire in the castle courtyard tomorrow night and you and the dog are the guests of honor.(Gabriella and The Hound were seized)

Joffrey: Take them away!(Yelled angrily)

Podrick: Please no

Joffrey: Lock them up like her father when we get back

A soldier: Walk(The three of them were dragged away)

Before any Unsullied men could stop them Joffrey and his soldiers were long gone and out of Meereen with their captives. The minute they were back in King's Landing Gabriella, The Hound, and Podrick were thrown into separate cells. Joffrey entered Gabriella's cell shutting the door behind him.

Joffrey: Do you feel as uncomfortable as you look?

Gabriella: Just let me go(Said angrily)

Joffrey: The time has come mermaid, you stand upon the brink of the abyss. But even now It's not to late. I can save you from the flames of this world and the next. Choose me or the fire!(Walked over so he was behind her)

Gabriella: You would have a mermaid?! You're truly evil(Fear in her voice)

Joffrey: No Gabriella, my curse is that I'm human unlike you.

Joffrey: Mermaid witch I have a foolish wish to set you free. I'll be your sanctuary. I will save you and we'll share everlasting sanctuary.(Rubbing her arms)

Joffrey: Think of what I offered you. Save yourself.(Rubbed her right cheek)

Gabriella: I rather die then be yours!(Said angrily as she ran out of his grip and away from him)

Joffrey: What about Sander your dog, would you rather him die too?

Gabriella: No(Cried)

Joffrey: His fate lies in your hands

Gabriella: Why?! I don't understand! Why me of all people?!(Cried)

Joffrey: I wish I knew, sometimes we are drawn to the things that destroy us.

Gabriella: You truly are a monster!(Cried)

Gabriella: No! No!(Cried and struggled as he seized her and tried to kiss her)

She pushed him down and ran to the door clutching the window bars.

Gabriella: Sander! Help! Help! Please help!(Cried and screamed)

Joffrey: Guard!(Yelled as Gabriella ran away from the door)

The guard: Yes your grace?

Joffrey: Bring Sander Clegane to this cell(Stood up)

Joffrey: Perhaps my dear this will help you think of my offer.

The Hound was pushed into the cell

Joffrey: Exchange your last words with one another. Unless of course you change your mind.

Joffrey: Don't let them stay together too long(Said to the guard)

The guard: Yes your grace

The guard shut the door after Joffrey walked out.

The Hound: We have to stop him. What did Joffrey do to you?!(Said angrily)

Gabriella: He offered to set me free if I give myself up to him! If I say yes he'll spare you!(Cried)

The Hound: I don't care what happens to me!

Gabriella started crying

Gabriella: Either way it wouldn't save me. So no I won't take his offer.

The Hound: We have so little time left to say goodbye

Gabriella: So let's say it while we have the chance

They rubbed each other's right cheek. Then they fell on their knees sobbing as they held each other close and tight. He grabbed her face and they made out as they stood up. The next night after they were pulled into the courtyard Gabriella and The Hound hugged each other one last time before they were pulled away again. Gabriella was pulled onto the platform of wood and tied to the post.

Joffrey: Think of what I offered you. What is your answer?

She spit in his face

Gabriella: Never!(Yelled)

Bronn: Let my daughter go Joffrey! You know she has done nothing to deserve this!

Joffrey lite the wood as Gabriella cried

Bronn: Gabriella!

Before the fire could get too high Podrick and Tyrion ran out. Podrick freeded The Hound and Tyrion freeded Gabriella and pulled her off of the wood.

Tyrion: Run!

He, Podrick, Gabriella, and The Hound ran inside. Tyrion took her to his room and made her sit on the bed with him.

Gabriella: Your such a good friend Tyrion(Leaned her head against his right shoulder)

Tyrion: Yes I'm your friend(Gabriella passed out)

He saw that her eyes were closed and she was not moving.

Tyrion: Gabriella? Gabriella?! Wake up! Wake up!(Said worriedly)

Tyrion: Oh no(Gently laid her down)

Joffrey: Is she dead?(Walked in)

Tyrion: Because of you(Growled angrily as he stood up)

Joffrey: Good, at last Westros is free of Gabriella. Now that she's gone her poison dies with her. It was her choice uncle, I could have helped her and loved her.

Tyrion: What do you know of love?! Who have you ever loved?! You're weak!(Podrick ran in)

Podrick helped Tyrion throw Joffrey out the window. As soon as Joffrey hit the ground and died Daenerys showed up with the Unsullied and her dragons killing Cersi, Jamie, Tywin, and anyone loyal to them. As Tyrion kneeled on the floor sobbing The Hound ran in.

The Hound: Gabriella!(Ran to the bed grabbing her hand)

Tyrion: She's gone(Crying)

The Hound: No no

The Hound sobbed on her stomach suddenly Gabriella started coughing.

The Hound: Oh my god Gabriella! Your safe now and your home! Daenerys is out there right now with the Unsullied taking care of Cersi, Jamie, Tywin, and anyone loyal to them.(Helped her sit up)

Podrick: And Tyrion and I threw Joffrey out the window. He fell to his death.

Gabriella: Do you really think I'm safe?(Smiled)

Tyrion: Yes

Gabriella: Thank you(Rubbed The Hound's left cheek)

The Hound picked her up into his arms and stood up.

The Hound: Podrick, Tyrion, please bring mine and Gabriella's things to Jamie's old room. That's the room we're going to be taking.

Tyrion: Of course, I agree

The Hound walked out carrying her. He carried her to Jamie's room and gently sat down with her on his lap holding her close. Once Podrick and Tyrion left after bringing everything The Hound spoke.

The Hound: You're so beautiful(Rubbed her left cheek)

He kissed her forehead

The Hound: Everything is okay now It's all over. Let's get some sleep. You must be exasted.

As soon as The Hound got his shirt off and Gabriella had her night gown on they crawled into bed holding each other and went to sleep. Once the battle was done and won Daenerys and the Unsullied moved in. Bronn was sent straight to the medic room to take care of the wipe marks on his back. Daenerys took Cersi's room of course. Tyrion who became her hand like she promised took Joffrey's room. Bronn took Tywin's room. Tommon and Myrcella were unfortunately perished during battle and Podrick took Tommen's room. Podrick became Tyrion's steward once again, Bronn became Tyrion's sellsword once again, The Hound became Tyrion's personal bodyguard, and Gabriella offered to become Missandei's handmaid so she did. Thanks to Daenerys any punishment Gabriella and Podrick would receive for deserting the Night's Watch was canceled. Three weeks later Gabriella and The Hound married. Five months later they gave birth to a baby girl. The baby had Gabriella's hair color and The Hound's eye and skin color. Gabriella named the baby Ariel after her best friend who just like Gabriella got the human life, true love, and daughter she dreamed of. The baby took Myrcella's room. Seeing his true love almost get burned to death broke The Hound. It took ten months for him to get over his fear of fire again.

#addiction #littlemermaid #gameofthrones #got #bronn #thehound #sandarclegene #joffrey baratheon #king's landing #Gabriella #musical #singing #story #storyofmine

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betwixt-these-pages · 8 years

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A Ghostly Mortality

by Tonya Kappes

on Tour February 28 – March 30, 2017

Synopsis:

That ghost sure looks . . . familiar

Only a handful of people know that Emma Lee Raines, proprietor of a small-town Kentucky funeral home, is a “Betweener.” She helps ghosts stuck between here and the ever-after—murdered ghosts. Once Emma Lee gets them justice they can cross over to the great beyond.

But Emma Lee’s own sister refuses to believe in her special ability. In fact, the Raines sisters have barely gotten along since Charlotte Rae left the family business for the competition. After a doozy of an argument, Emma Lee is relieved to see Charlotte Rae back home to make nice. Until she realizes her usually snorting, sarcastic, family-ditching sister is a… ghost.

Charlotte Rae has no earthly idea who murdered her or why. With her heart in tatters, Emma Lee relies more than ever on her sexy beau, Sheriff Jack Henry Ross…because this time, catching a killer means the Raines sisters will have to make peace with each other first.

Book Details:

Genre: Cozy Mystery, Paranormal

Published by: Witness

Publication Date: February 28th 2017

Number of Pages: 336

ISBN: 0062466976 (ISBN13: 9780062466976)

Series: Ghostly Southern Mysteries #6

Purchase Links: Amazon 🔗 | Barnes & Noble 🔗 | Goodreads 🔗

Read an excerpt:

Lawdy bee.” Granny scooted to the edge of the chair and lifted her arms in the air like she was worshiping in the Sunday morning service at Sleepy Hollow Baptist and the spirit just got put in her.

I sucked in a deep breath, preparing myself for whatever was going to come out of Zula Fae Raines Payne’s mouth, my granny. She was a ball of southern spitfire in her five-foot-four-inch frame topped off with bright red hair that I wasn’t sure was real or out of a L’Oréal bottle she’d gotten down at the Buy-N-Fly.

“Please, please, please,” she begged. “Let me die before anything happens to Emma Lee.” Her body slid down the fancy, high-back mahogany leather chair as she fell to her knees with her hands clasped together, bringing them back up in the air as she pleaded to the Big Guy in the sky. “I’m begging you.”

“Are you nuts?” My voice faded to a hushed stillness. I glanced back at the closed door of my sister’s new office, in fear she was going to walk in and see Granny acting up. I sat in the other fancy, high-back mahogany leather chair next to Granny’s and grabbed her by the loose skin of her underarm. “Get back up on this chair before Charlotte Rae gets back in here and sees you acting like a fool.”

“What?” Granny quirked her eyebrows questioningly as if her behavior was normal. My head dropped along with my jaw in the “are you kidding me” look.

“Well, I ain’t lying!” She spat, “I do hope and pray you are the granddaughter that will be doing my funeral, unless you get a flare up of the ‘Funeral Trauma.’ ” She sucked in a deep breath and got up off her knees. She ran her bony fingers down the front of her cream sweater to smooth out any wrinkles so she’d be presentable like a good southern woman, forgetting she was just on her knees begging for mercy.

“Flare up?” I sighed with exasperation. “It’s not like arthritis.”

The “Funeral Trauma.” It was true. I was diagnosed with the “Funeral Trauma” after a decorative plastic Santa fell off the roof of Artie’s Meat and Deli, knocking me flat out cold and now I could see dead people. I had told Doc Clyde I was having some sort of hallucinations and seeing dead people, but he insisted I had been in the funeral business a little too long and seeing corpses all of my life had brought on the trauma. Truthfully, the Santa had given me a gift. Not a gift you’d expect Santa to give you, but it was the gift of seeing clients of Eternal Slumber, my family’s funeral home business where I was the undertaker. Some family business. Anyway, a psychic told me I was now a Betweener. I helped people who were stuck between here and the ever after. The Great Beyond. The Big Guy in the sky. One catch . . . the dead people I saw were murdered and they needed me to help them solve their murder before they could cross over.

“I’m fine,” I huffed and took the pamphlet off of Charlotte Rae’s desk, keeping my gift to myself. The only people who knew were me, the psychic and Sheriff Jack Henry Ross, my hot, hunky and sexy boyfriend. He was as handy as a pocket on a shirt when it came time for me to find a killer when a ghost was following me around. “We are here to get her to sign my papers and talk about this sideboard issue once and for all.” Granny stared at me.

My head slid forward like a turtle and I popped my eyes open.

“I’m fine,” I said through closed teeth.

“You are not fine.” Granny rolled her eyes so big, I swear she probably hurt herself. “People are still going around talking about how you talk to yourself.” She shook her finger at me. “If you don’t watch it, you are going to be committed. Surrounded by padded walls. Then—She jabbed her finger on my arm. I swatted her away with the pamphlet.

“Charlotte Rae will have full control over my dead body and I don’t want someone celebrating a wedding while I lay corpse in the next room. Lawdy bee,” Granny griped. I opened the pamphlet and tried to ignore Granny as best I could.

“Do you hear me, Emma Lee?” Granny asked. I could feel her beady eyes boring into me.

“Don’t you be disrespecting your elders. I asked you a question,” she warned when I didn’t immediately answer her question.

“Granny.” I placed the brochure in my lap and reminded myself to remain calm. Something I did often when it came to my granny. “I hear you. Don’t you worry about a thing. By the time you get ready to die, they will have you in the nut-house alongside me,” I joked, knowing it would get her goat. The door flung open and the click of Charlotte Rae’s high-dollar heels tapped the hardwood floor as she sashayed her way back into her office. The soft linen green suit complemented Charlotte’s sparkly green eyes and the chocolate scarf that was neatly tied around her neck. It was the perfect shade of brown to go with her long red hair and pale skin.

“I’m so sorry about that.” She stopped next to our chairs and looked between me and Granny. She shook the long, loose curls over her shoulders. “What? What is wrong, now?”

“Granny is all worried I’m going to get sent away to the nuthouse and you are going to lay her out here.” The words tumbled out of my mouth before I could stop them. Or did my subconscious take over my mouth? It was always a competition between me and Charlotte, only it was one-sided. Mine. Charlotte never viewed me as competition because she railroaded me all my life. Like now. She’d left Eternal Slumber with zero guilt, leaving me in charge so she could make more money at Hardgrove’s Legacy Center, formerly known as Hardgrove’s Funeral Homes until they got too big for their britches and decided to host every life event possible just to make more money.

Author Bio:

Tonya Kappes has written more than fifteen novels and four novellas, all of which have graced numerous bestseller lists including USA Today. Best known for stories charged with emotion and humor and filled with flawed characters, her novels have garnered reader praise and glowing critical reviews. She lives with her husband, two very spoiled schnauzers, and one ex-stray cat in northern Kentucky. Now that her boys are teenagers, Tonya writes full-time but can be found at all of her guys’ high school games with a pencil and paper in hand.

Catch Up with Tonya Kappes on her Website 🔗, Twitter 🔗, & Facebook 🔗

Giveaway:

This is a rafflecopter giveaway hosted by Partners In Crime Virtual Book Tours for Tonya Kappes and Witness Impulse. There will be 1 US winner of one PRINTED set of The Ghostly Southern Mysteries #1-6 by Tonya Kappes. The giveaway begins on February 27th and runs through April 2nd, 2017.

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Get More Great Reads at Partners In Crime Virtual Book Tours

Quick Reasons: I was a tiny bit confused about some plot things; entertaining, snarky, head-strong character; love the setting and dialect; love that a loose end played on throughout is used as a mini introduction to the next book; I might just have to pick up the rest of this series!

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fishing for more

entertaining

devoured it

purple prose

Huge thanks to Tonya Kappes, Witness Publishing, Partners in Crime Tours, and Edelweiss for sending me a free digital copy of this title in exchange for an honest review! This in no way altered my read of or opinions on this book.

First things first: I went into this book KNOWING I hadn’t read any of the previous books in the series. I knew, going in, that this might potentially lead to some confusion about the world and/or characters. I warned myself the confusion might, at times, be more than anticipated. So I wasn’t blind or oblivious to the fact that there might, reading this, be problems waiting for me. This being said… I was pleasantly surprised when I managed to get through most of this read without a hitch! While some past events went unexplained or were left up to me to figure out for myself (the relationship between Emma Lee and Jack Henry, for instance)–I was able to piece them together fairly easily, and remain convinced of the world and characters. Of course, there was still a little bit of confusion about certain things…but in the end, I was able to dive into this story and remain curious and enthralled throughout. This basically boils down to this for potential readers: while I still recommend starting at the beginning (because I’m usually that type of reader) you could pretty easily slip into the story later on if you want or need to.

The characters are realistic and entertaining. Emma Lee was a snarky and head-strong character throughout the read; not once did she allow anyone to talk down to her, or sway her mind once she’d set it, or tell her what to do. I really loved following her on her ventures to find her sister’s killer–while it’s clear from the get-go that she’s not a professional detective or cop, she made the journey quick and fun. The moments with her sister were mixed parts aggravating, endearing, and totally believable; the moments with Granny, who’s a spitfire all her own, were both hilarious and heart-wrenching.

I had such a fun time following the clues in this murder-mystery, I’m considering picking up the rest of the series (and starting from the beginning this time)! This was an entertaining, snarky, believable read with some wild and head-strong characters. I recommend this to lovers of cozy mysteries, sleuthy characters, and small towns with big hearts. Follow the clues, penguins, and see if you can figure out who the killer is before the big reveal! I promise you’ll be just as surprised as I was!

Blog Tour, Excerpt, Giveaway, and Review: A Ghostly Mortality A Ghostly Mortality by Tonya Kappes on Tour February 28 - March 30, 2017 Synopsis: That ghost sure looks .

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