#but i can't because i keep making these stupid thoughtless decisions | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

getitinbusan · 5 years

Text

September 1st

Happy Birthday Jungkookie!

The balcony doors were open and a cool breeze drifted through the bedroom. Lazy days with Jungkook were rare, even when he was on a break he was always up to something. It had reached noon but you were both still laying in bed scrolling mindlessly through your phones when you brought it up. "You're going to be 23 soon, I think we should have a big party" He put his phone down and rolled into your side, "I was thinking about going to Jeju," he said matter of factly. "Oh, am I invited?" you asked smiling. "I was going to invite everyone, my family, the guys and yes," he giggled, "I guess you can come too. Would that be okay?" Running your fingers through his messy hair you pushed it back out of his face and nodded. "You shouldn't have to plan your own party Jungkook, we can do it together"

You had a week to figure things out, guests, accommodations, food. A party was one thing but coordinating a destination get together in a few days was a crazy undertaking.

You really wanted Kookie to have the best time and just be able to relax and enjoy himself, he however, wasn't being very co operative. Everytime you asked questions he shut you down, if you brought it up he brushed you off. He was downstairs at the gym when you came across his to do list.

Call and confirm guests✔

Book Flights✔

Book Hotel ✔

Schedule Dinner and party space✔

Reserve private beach✔

*do not forget to pick up the package*

Puzzled as to why these were already checked off as done you messaged Joon.

Y/N: Hey Joon, I just wanted to invite you to Kookies party in Jeju. Are you down?

Joon: Yep, already confirmed with JK last week.

Y/N: What kind of cake do you think I should get?

Joon: I thought that the guys were taking care of the cake? Don't worry about anything, I think everything is already organized.

Y/N: Oh… okay, thanks.

Flopping on the couch you couldn't help but feel left out. You heard Jungkook's key turning in the lock, the door squeaking open announcing his arrival. He was looking through his phone while he dropped his bag on the floor. "Hey Babe, Joon said you messaged him about the party? He walked over to where you were sitting. He tapped your nose with his finger, "I've already taken care of everything so all you have to do is pack"

Feeling disappointed your face fell into a frown. "Jungkook, I just wanted to take care of you for once, to be able to contribute a little." He looked flustered, "I'm sorry Y/N, I just didn't want to burden you with it." Upset you stood up, "I can't believe you would think that throwing you a party would be a burden on me Jungkook… it makes me feel useless," your statement trailed off as you walked away to your bedroom.

Tae was your closest confidante and you knew he'd tell it like it is.

Y/N: I know I'm probably overthinking and being too sensitive but I'm sad Tae..

Tae: What's wrong love?

Y/N: If Guk doesn't think I'm capable of throwing him a party…this is so stupid… but he certainly can't think I'd be able to take care of him as a wife… it's been two years Tae we've never even discussed marriage. Does he think of me that way at all?

Tae: Noooo Y/N, he loves you so much. You are totally over reacting. Please, just don't make an issue of this, it's his birthday.

You didn't know but in the other room Jungkook was busy texting Jin.

JK: I don't know what to do Y/N is mad at me for not letting her help with the party.

Jin: Just make up a job and get her to do it.

JK: That's Brilliant!! Thank you.

He made a quick call, arranging that you would be picking up the last to do on his list, the package. He pulled the bedroom door open and lay down beside you, "I'm sorry, I've been keeping a secret from you." You set down your phone giving him your full attention. "Junhyung is going to propose to his girlfriend, he swore me to secrecy, that's why I've been planning everything, so she won't find out." You felt your temper rise, "Are you fucking kidding me? You finally get your birthday off, you haven't had a personal party for years and your brothers using it to propose to his girlfriend all while making you plan it for him?" Jungkook laughed, "It sounds kind of shitty when you put it that way. It's really not that big of a deal Y/N, I'm happy he wants to share it with everyone." How could you fault him for wanting to help his family? He was such a giving person and it was part of the reason you loved him so much. "If you really want to help there's one thing left that you can do."

It was all set, the flight was leaving at 3pm and you had been tasked with picking up the box and keeping it safe until the party. Arriving at the jeweller the older man greeted you kindly. "Would you like to see it?" he opened the iconic tiffany blue box while you nodded. It was a beautiful square cut diamond on a vintage white gold band, it was breathtaking. "The gentleman took a long time deciding on this particular ring, he said it had to be perfect. What do you think?" Your heart was aching in your chest, lately you found yourself daydreaming about marrying Jungkook, him placing a ring just like this on your finger. "She's a lucky girl, I'm sure she's going to love it." It's not that you weren't happy about the engagement, you were just completely full on green with envy jealous. They haven't even been together a year and Junhyung is already confident enough in her to propose.

You knew you were being an idiot, Jungkook loved you, you lived together, he always made sure your needs were met but here you were upset because she was getting a ring first. Taking the box you snapped the little lid closed and put it into your purse for safe keeping. Enough, you needed to stop thinking about yourself. It was Kooks birthday and it was time to think of him and what he wanted, but what do you get someone who has everything? Wandering around you came across a neon lit sex shop, perfect! Three days away, three new sets of sexy lingerie and a bag full of goodies. Maybe you didn't get to plan the party but you could make sure he had a few extra surprises.

It was a short smooth flight and you were amongst the last to arrive. Making your way to the suite to change for dinner Jungkook flung himself down on the bed, "I'm calling dibs on the first shower!" you called out. You got ready putting on the new black lace thong set, loose black mini sundress over top and wrapped your hair into a messy bun. Exiting the bathroom you found Jungkook in the same position on the bed snoring lightly. Crawling on top of him, you pulled back his bucket hat to reveal his closed eyes and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. He instinctively wrapped his arms around you and pulled you close for more. "You need to get up babe" he hummed softly into your neck, "that's the problem, I am up," he moved your hand to his bulge. Placing his hands on your ass he could feel the lace under your dress and he let out a needy moan, "Jungkook we need to go, everyone's waiting" he pouted, "but it's my Birthday." Getting off of him and laughing you couldn't help but throw it in his face, "Yes, and if I had planned this party I would have pushed dinner back so the birthday boy could have gotten his dick sucked before hand. You really only have yourself to blame Jungkook" he knew he was defeated so he rolled off the bed and sulked to the shower. He came out about 20 minutes later skin glowing, tan hanbok pants with a white dress shirt, his hair long and fluffy. "You look amazing Guk," you walked over and hugged him sneaking a kiss onto the side of his neck. "You had your chance Y/N, now we both have to suffer all night"

You walked hand in hand to the open air dining room where most of your friends and family were waiting at beautiful white rose adorned tables. "Jungkook, did you arrange all these details?" Smiling he nodded, "Did I do good?" That dull ache hit your chest again, yes he did good, he'd planned the perfect proposal… for someone else. You kissed his cheek and lay your head on his shoulder, "I think you've pulled off every girls dream" Trying to hide your melancholy throughout dinner you stayed pretty quiet only offering small smiles instead of conversation. You didn't want to be selfish but you knew in a few hours all talk would be about weddings. The thoughtless question on everyone's lips would inevitably turn to "when are you going to take the plunge?" It usually happened at family gatherings, you'd watch them corner Jungkook and he'd awkwardly explain that one day when his career wasn't so busy you'd be able to think more clearly about it. You hated how calculated of a decision marrying you would have to be for him. Seeing how romantic he could be with the laid out gestures before you, made you question why he could do it for someone else but not you? Maybe he didn't think you were the one? Like he could hear your inner thoughts he put his hand on your thigh under the table, "What's going on, is everything ok?" He asked quietly. "Just thinking about getting you back to the room later, that's all." He kissed your cheek but you knew he didn't believe you. He seemed a little out of sorts himself, maybe this whole situation had him questioning your future as well.

"I think maybe we need a minute to talk Y/N, let's go while everyone's finishing." He took your hand and lead you away from the group towards a private area of the beach. Sitting down in the sand he motioned for you to sit in between his legs in front of him. You sat with your back against his chest, head on his shoulder and he put his arms around you. The sun was beginning to set into a light shade of purple and orange, "I want to know why you're sad," he said it like he knew the answer but needed confirmation. "I just wish that this party was only for you, for your birthday, that it wasn't about engagements…" you were trying hard to not sound jealous but he could see through you. "How about you tell me the truth?" He kissed the top of your head. Reaching into your purse you pulled out the box and handed it to him. "This, this is what's bothering me. Jungkook…do you think that you'll ever want me to be your wife? Do we want the same things?" His arms still around you he held the box in front of you and opened it slowly, "It sure is a beautiful ring," he said. You closed your eyes, knowing it wasn't for you, "it really is," you answered softly.

"Do you really not know what I want Y/N? I love you more than anything in this world. The only thing I wanted for my birthday this year was to bring you here, to sit on this beach with my arms around you and to propose with this ring. So… you tell me, do we really want the same thing? Will you marry me?" Absolutely 100% shocked you turned to him, "Are you joking with me Jungkook?" you hit his shoulder. He laughed, "I think I know better than that" still skeptical you asked, "So all of this was a lie? You really made me carry around my own engagement ring all day thinking it was for someone else?" His grin gave away the fact that he was pretty pleased with himself, "No, you haven't said yes yet so technically it's still not yours." You crashed your lips into his as he pulled you back on top of him in the sand, "Yes"

Walking back to the restaurant the tables had been moved and outdoor furniture and candles had taken their places. Everyone was chatting and drinking until they noticed your arrival, silence fell and eyebrows raised waiting for the news. "Of course she said yes!" At Jungkook's declaration everyone cheered and the waiters came out with trays of champagne as the boys carried out a large white cake adorned with sparklers. The rest of the night was perfect, you danced in the sand as guests slowly filtered out back to their rooms for the evening. Looking around, you realized it was just the two of you left, lost in your own world. "Maybe we should call it a night?" you said. "Maybe, but I don't really want this moment to end" he responded with a kiss. "Maybe… you forgot what I'm wearing under this, and that it's also your birthday, and that I still haven't given you your gift" He grinned and pulled your hand leading you back to the room.

You left him waiting on the bed as you got ready in the bathroom. Finally revealing yourself, you were fully naked, he whined "Babe what happened to the lingerie, I mean you're beautiful naked but… " you cut him off "But I'm not naked, I'm wearing this beautiful ring. It also just so happens that I bought you a ring too" you threw him the little black bag and he pulled out his gift. He blushed, "Oh mines a little bigger, and silicone and definitely not church appropriate." Cocking your eyebrow at him you added, "And it vibrates too. Happy Birthday Baby"

#bts jungkook #jeon jungkook #jungook #jungkook x reader #jungkook birthday #Jungkook proposal #Kookie #Nochu #jungkook x y/n #Jungkook jeju #Happy birthday baby #bts imagines #jungkook imagines #Guk #Bts kookie #jungkook smut

133 notes · View notes

uruhaxrukifanfics · 5 years

Note

please give me something so angsty it will make me come back here just to say "i can't believe you've done that to me!!"

The bed was big and comfy, could still barely fit six people, but for just Kouyou - or Kouyou and Takanori both - there was more than enough room to keep anything from getting weird, probably. He’d managed to pull himself up into sitting by the time Takanori knocked from outside the hotel room door, calling him in and reminding him to make sure the door was locked behind him.

“There you are.” He mused with a lazy smile.

An impressed whistle filtered from his puckered lips as he revealed himself fully, arching an eyebrow. “I didn’t know you get around like this,” Takanori greeted with a teasing quirk of a smile, leaning against the wall beside him as he folded his arms across his chest and eyeing Kouyou from where he shifted his weight to his left hip. “Anything else you wanna fill me in on, Shima?”

Kouyou snorted. “My clients get around like this,” he corrected. “I work in hotels. Being nice to the housekeepers is the best way to get decent service. Now, get your tiny ass in here. Order something off the room menu to soak up all those shots I heard you drink. You’ll appreciate me in the morning.” Kouyou didn’t care that it was overpriced and ridiculous when he wasn’t the one who had a credit card on the tab. It was common knowledge when you bought a room for a rent boy you were going to lose at least a hefty price on the tab. They might get bent out of shape over it, but between the lot of them they could certainly pay it. “Let me see your wrist.” His high was already wearing off again – coke always wore off so quickly – so it made him reach out for Takanori all languid and slow, lazy.

Takanori scoffed, a small pout managing to steal its way to the forefront as he sucked his teeth. “You didn’t hear anything,” he mumbled, pushing himself off the wall nice and easy so that he could make his way over just as told. His bag was what he tossed aside and left by the nightstand, standing close and looking for the menu Kouyou spoke of. When he found it, he grabbed for it and tucked a leg underneath himself when sitting on the edge of the bed with Kouyou’s guiding hands reaching for him after he removed his shoes.

“You shouldn’t have hit him–”

Takanori huffed, defensive. “I know–”

“–but I bet you didn’t leave a mark like this.” Kouyou pointed out with a frown as he took in the bruise encircling the other’s slender wrist that bloomed purplish-red., ever so gentle and careful even as he turned Takanori’s arm in his hold. It wasn’t right. Takanori deserved someone better. Would he leave his husband if Kouyou told him the truth? Maybe, but where would he go? What would he do? What would Kouyou do? It was too much to consider, and once again he found himself deciding that he just couldn’t.

These days it felt like he kept having to make that decision every time he saw him.Takanori shook his head. In the end, to him, it didn’t matter how bad it was. His bruise would heal and fade, and… what happened will try to be amended for. He didn’t need forgiveness, but at least he would be the first to admit to what he shouldn’t have done. And for that, he would be apologetic for. They’ll work it out tomorrow, if his husband would spare him the time to talk. Internally, he sighed. If he went ignored tomorrow, he’d understand. “It’s stupid, don’t worry about it,” Takanori assured absently. “It didn’t look so bad earlier, I promise.” His eyes languidly roamed the selections of food he could order in via the telephone on the nightstand, but it was Kouyou’s silence that made his hooded, slightly red eyes glance over at him. “How’re you feeling?” “Hmmm.” Kouyou didn’t give him much of an answer except a noncommittal hum, because while Takanori and he were trying this ‘open’ thing, when it came to information about his job at least, he probably didn’t need to hear details about the client he was hired for. Takanori didn’t push for an answer, and Kouyou was grateful. He didn’t want to talk about it. Just like Takanori seemed to not want to talk about his own bruises, so he let him be, only nodding in agreement as if it were some unsaid queue. But what silence gave to Takanori created a bit more awareness in his alcohol-muddled mind to the fact that Kouyou, upon further inspection, also had bruises. Bruises that marked the hands that handled his bruised wrist, arms, even more on his hips and thighs, but the boxers and t-shirt he wore mostly hid them well. They were marks Kouyou made people pay extra for, he knew, but it was something he fuzzily recalled his old childhood friend not liking so much. Turning his wrist carefully in Kouyou’s grasp, he used the leverage he had to catch ahold of Kouyou’s hand before he could retract it and he didn’t stop, didn’t pause to catch his gaze as he brought it close for his viewing. His hands mimicked the kind, careful treatment Kouyou had given to him, near-permanent-bedroom eyes so intent to see the bruises that he knew hadn’t been there the last time he saw him. A palm steadily scaled up the underside of Kouyou’s arm to outstretch the limb more comfortably and, once scooting up closer on the bed’s edge so he wasn’t leaning from an awkward distance, he dipped his head to press the softest kiss he could muster to a bruise at his arm, leaving in its wake a print of his lipstick. Kouyou’s breath hitched in his throat a little.Oh.It was a thoughtless action. An action running on the fumes of care and wanting to cover what marked him. It was a temporary fix, but Takanori found the action satisfying all the same and he did it again, took his sweet time; as if he had all the time in the world. Another bruise, another patch-up in the form of dusky red lipstick that, whenever he pulled back to marvel at his own work, he erased with his thumb to smear it away. Gone, but still there in traces. When he reached the inner side of Kouyou’s wrist, he let Kouyou’s palm cup his cheek and leaned into it, holding it in place for a moment before turning just enough to press his lips deeper and linger, with no intention to clear it away like he had done the rest. His eyes swept over it with satisfaction before leaning back into Kouyou’s palm, and then, only then, he glanced up at Kouyou under the fan of his eyelashes; inky locks spilling over a shoulder.It had been far too long since Kouyou wanted to sleep with someone. Sure, he got attractive clients sometimes that he didn’t mind, but if they’d approached him in a bar, or weren’t paying him, he still wouldn’t have wanted to. Sex wasn’t something he wanted all that often. Despite his job, he didn’t exactly do anything casual. Without the involvement of feelings, it was just work. Why would he work if he wasn’t getting paid, right? But watching Takanori made him want. He didn’t even know if he could get off right now, between his previous client and the bump of coke left as a tip with his payment, but that wasn’t really what he cared about. What he wanted was to push Takanori back, lay him out, make him moan–“Want to lay down with me after I eat?” Takanori asked in a low murmur with a soft, short-lived quirk of an eyebrow and a tiny smile that cut into Kouyou’s reverie. It was a question Kouyou could give him a verbal answer to, this time. “Help me undress?”“…Yeah.” Kouyou still hadn’t moved his hand from his cheek, hadn’t realized he’d been stroking the skin with his thumb until Takanori turned away to shed off his blazer and unbuckle his belt. He needed to get himself together.That was hard to do when Takanori moved his hair aside so Kouyou could unfasten his necklace while the other fiddled with the buttons of his shirt. He almost managed to control himself, unfastening the hook and leaning over to place aside the necklace on the nightstand by the phone, fingers hovering near the bottom of Takanori’s spine, just before the curve of his arse. But almost didn’t win him any prizes, because when Taknaori’s shirt slacked down his shoulder to expose skin to the air conditioner’s chilly air, Kouyou couldn’t help but slowly slide his hand along the warm skin shown to him. His fingers splayed atop the scatter of tiny moles and faint freckles, eyes soaking them in like constellations painted across a night sky, before descending his mouth to press wet heat to the juncture where shoulder and neck met, lingering there. Takanori’s breath hitched audibly in surprise, a soft, wordless, tiny noise around the part of his lips it slackened around as his eyelashes fluttered, and it seemed as if he thought nothing of it to tilt his head and expose the length of his neck just a little more, his hand blindly finding the back of Kouyou’s neck to hold him there and shiver. He used Kouyou for balance by leaning a bit of his weight against him after discarding his shirt, shimming his hips free a bit to let his slacks pool around his ankles once slipping over his legs.

This was a bad idea. But now that Kouyou was having it he couldn’t stop. He didn’t know what had come over him, other than that he wanted to. He so rarely got to do anything he wanted. If Takanori had pulled away from him or told him off he would have stopped in a heartbeat; it would have broken the weird spell he was under, no matter how out of it he was, but Takanori didn’t. He held him, sought out for his hand that wasn’t plastered to his back and guided it close to press a lingering kiss at his palm before resting it gently at his throat once his head lulled back atop of Kouyou’s shoulder, plastering his back to his chest. And with it, he took away whatever worries Kouyou had, gone so easily and tossed to the wind.“Taka,” Kouyou breathed his name like a prayer, slowly kissing and sucking on the spot of skin his mouth claimed until it was red under his ministrations and then moving to another, biting down carefully whilst tracing Takanori’s bared throat and giving a slight squeeze before trailing feather light down his chest, down down down, and stopping just above the squirm of hips when his fingertips brushed the line of discovered panties– Panties. Kouyou felt dizzy.“Fuck,” He nearly growled, his other hand gripping Taknaori’s hip and squeezing, dragging him in a little closer so that he had Takanori plastering his back up against his chest; coaxing a soft moan right out of him. “Taka.” He nearly begged, moving up and breathing his name wrapped around an unvoiced plea in his ear, needing that permission. He would never do anything Takanori wouldn’t want, but if he let him, he’d do anything.

That could have been their window to place an end to this before it got out of hand. It should have made Takanori pause and think – actually think – and stop, the ring on the fourth finger of his left hand said he had a husband, probably waiting for him to come back no matter how out of hand their argument had gotten. A husband that was inconsistent, hardly home, and hadn’t touched him like this since…“Yeah,” Takanori breathed with a nod of his head, a thrill tickling the base of his spine. “Yes–” He just needed to get his hands on him, starved enough to need Kouyou’s hands on him, and that was what pushed him to turn so he could crawl his way into Kouyou’s lap and straddle him, cupping his face in his hands and finally meeting his gaze. “Do it,” he edged on in a whisper as he brushed their lips together, his tone husked in arousal and want. “Take them off me.”That was all the consent Kouyou needed to make whatever sense of control he had over himself, any thoughts that he shouldn’t be doing this, snap. He gripped Takanori’s hips and squeezed carefully again, rolling his hips up against him and pressing in for a deep kiss, smothering anything else Takanori had in mind to say. He didn’t have to say anything more. His pupils were so wide they were overtaking the rest of his iris, breath hitching already, and he nodded in agreement as if it were an afterthought. His hands hooked under Takanori’s legs and turned them on the bed big enough that he could just roll right on top of him, flipping Takanori’s world askew. Takanori would have used that same momentum to push and turn them himself, but being spread open and held in place did things to a man that had him seeing stars. Takanori, under any and every means necessary, was no exception to it.Settling between the spread of Takanori’s legs that his hands kept parted, Kouyou shivered. “Baby, look at you,” He murmured low and husky in awe under his breath, kissing and nipping his way slowly down Takanori’s neck. “You’re gorgeous.”

Takanori’s head tilted back into the mattress with an unintelligible noise and heart aflutter, his fingers burying in Kouyou’s hair after finally, finally, getting a chance to feel the shaved, faded undercut so intimately; arching into the onslaught of kisses Kouyou heatedly planted on his skin in his slow endeavor down his neck to reach his chest, mouth lingering on his stomach. His stomach and hips softly trembled under the mercy of Kouyou’s lingering ministrations, and when Kouyou’s teeth dragged the lacy garment down far enough to free his heavy arousal he made sure to lift his head and catch every sight of it. He didn’t want to forget this – he prayed he wouldn’t forget in the morning how Kouyou looked sucking a mark right at the juncture of his hip and leaving a matching bruise on the inside of his thought before–“Jesus– holy shit,” he swore in a colorful streak – that Kouyou grinned at – through a deep moan the moment Kouyou’s mouth found him, his head thumping back onto the mattress with desperate fingers curling in the other’s hair as if would help him. He couldn’t stop the way his left thigh gave a strong jolt underneath the palm of Kouyou’s hand as he was held in place, or how his hips automatically shifted to slowly rock into the moist heat of Kouyou’s mouth that felt too overwhelmingly good; helplessly, blankly, staring up at the ceiling in a heap of agape dusky red lips and flushed pink from the highs of his cheeks to the length of his neck. Kouyou thought he looked stunning, trying to keep his eyes open and whispering little pleas for Kouyou to keep looking at him the way he did. Keep looking at me just like that, please– He nodded, of course. Gave him exactly what he wanted and sucked him down to the very hilt, his hands moving from holding Takanori’s legs spread to settling on his hips where he did not hold him down but encouraged him to rock up and use him. He could listen to Takanori moan under him for the rest of his life. It was so different; he hadn’t had sex for fun since the divorce with Yuu, and he hadn’t realized how sad that was until now. That it was with his married friend was something he’d have to deal with later, but for now he wanted to make Takanori feel good, make him come.

The back of Kouyou’s throat was enough to bring a man to his knees if Takanori was standing up as clipped sounds of pleasure twisted around the wet, lascivious sounds from fucking into his mouth without holding himself back whilst holding Kouyou’s head close. And when Takanori came, he came gasping helpless moans high for the heavens, toes curling– grinding trembling hips up against Kouyou’s face as his head thumped back into the mattress; eyes screwing shut and unable to keep their gaze locked. Kouyou’s mouth lingering to swallow him and chuckle around his mouthful only made his entire body flinch in oversensitivity, a breathy whine pulled from him as he shook his head and pushed weakly at Kouyou’s shoulder with a huffed laugh caught between a moan bubbling richly from out of him, hips squirming a twist in Kouyou’s hands whilst Kouyou slipped off of him with a lewd, little wet pop.That didn’t mean he wanted Kouyou to take his hands off him, no matter how sensitive he felt.“Oh, fuck,” Takanori sighed dreamily after a moment of trying to gather his thoughts together to form a coherently structured response. No set of words in any vocabulary could explain how floaty he felt, dazed and… shit. Holy shit, it had been one of the best orgasms he’s had outside his collection of toys and he laughed and laughed until his eyes grew teary and the zoo in his stomach dared to whisk him away if he didn’t get his hands on Kouyou any sooner. His hands needed to be on him now without an inch of his t-shirt stopping him from skin-on-skin contact, to feel Kouyou atop of him. And when he did have him, immediately settling right between the spread of his legs after discarding his shirt when he somehow found the strength to slip a leg out of his lacy panties simply so it could hang off his left ankle, he cupped Kouyou’s face in his hands and gazed at him with heavily lidded eyes. His thumb traced over his lips in a slow brush after taking the time to pepper kisses up and down the column of his neck and the sharp structure of his jawline.Despite the fact that it was Takanori, Kouyou was still surprised by the gentle caresses, the soft kisses that left little red smudges over his face. Even with the boyfriend experience included in his work, it was a softness he didn’t encourage, let alone receive, often. He didn’t realize how badly he wanted it… For a sex worker, he was positively touch starved. But when Takanori kissed him, it was the best part. Not an ounce of hesitation in sight. He nearly purred, squeezing Takanori’s hips and kissing back deeply, needy. He rolled his hips against his lazily, delighted to find that he was so hard, it almost hurt. Still, he didn’t rush, kissing Takanori languid and slow. He knew he would never get this again, but he was going to make it count."I want to lay you out,” He murmured between their shared kisses, voice low and thrumming. “Make you come again, and again, with my fingers,” kiss. “my mouth,” a deeper kiss, drawing back a smidgen just to breathe a whisper that would curl along the roof of Takanori’s mouth: “my cock.” Takanori’s mouth slacked in need, anticipation trickling hot down his spine and making him dizzy. “I think I can, what about you? Hmm? Maybe take you out onto the balcony and press you up against the glass, give some of the people in the upper floors across the way a show. You look so fucking good.“

Let him count the ways… How many times could Kouyou make him come in a single night? Could Kouyou keep up? Could he? Hell, he didn’t even know, but it seemed like it was a challenge waiting to be taken to find out. “You better make promise on taking me on the balcony later,” Takanori husked, running his fingers through Kouyou’s hair as he cupped the nape of his neck with his other hand. “I want them to see how good you make me feel when you fuck me.”Kouyou wouldn’t brag or anything, but he was good at sex. Sure, most people thought they were, but Kouyou was a professional. It was what he did for a living. But this? This wasn’t work. This was a delight, how insatiable Takanori was under him, around him, over him. He felt like he was eighteen all over again, young and easy and chasing the ocean’s waves that always returned to crash along the shore no matter how many times it strayed away, and not thirty. Every time he thought they were finished Takanori would shift or move or make a sweet sound that had him rearing to go all over again, all over the hotel room. The bed, the floor, the bathtub, the bathroom countertop.The balcony.Another orgasm wasn’t possible, Takanori said. No matter how full he wanted to be of Kouyou, again, no matter how much hearing him call him baby set him off – and other names of endearment that never failed to get home going throughout the night – he just… it was too much as Kouyou rolled his hips to fuck him slowly just as he wanted. But the pleasure was there, thrumming under his skin and coiling tight in his groin with a sob of pleasure. Kouyou just needed Takanori to keen his name when he came one more time, for the rising sun to bare witness just as the moon had and hear how he successfully coaxed it out of him, eyes wet and painted fingernails dragging across his back for the umpteenth time as he trembled in Kouyou’s hold; it would see reason why Kouyou’s chest fluttered as they panted heavily, clinging to one another and daring to never let go.Takanori was perfect. Kouyou had touched all of him, tasted him, listened to him keen and cry in pleasure, and he was sure of it. There wasn’t a single person in the world more perfect than Takanori Matsumoto and he didn’t want to let go of him, didn’t want to move away or out of him right away, so he didn’t. He rested atop of him, trying desperately to catch his breath in stuttering little gasps that found safety on Takanori’s chest and the comforting hand passing through wet locks; the scatter of little kisses pressed close to his forehead his eyes closed against as they found stability together in each other’s arms. He was all fucked out, had expended more energy with Takanori than he had on his client before him, and between the lot he was pretty sure he was going to sleep until tomorrow. Never mind that later entailed everything would come crashing down on them and they would have to talk. But, later was later and sleep was needed, and the pair ended up passing out in a matter of minutes after shifting to do so. At least for a few hours. Takanori stirred from his sleep only when Kouyou carefully shifted out of him, and to soothe the near-automatic sensation of being empty he gripped onto Kouyou, drowsily mumbling for him to come back so he could cradle his head back to his chest, where it belonged; oblivious to the rising sun and the early morning that bled into the afternoon.When either of them stirred, Kouyou was the first to wake. Simply because he was starving, and his head was throbbing. They’d drank all those little alcohol shooters last night – including more than a few body shots – but a bump of coke and alcohol didn’t mix. Not the next morning, at least. His tired body shifted and he rubbed his face against the pillow under him with a low groan. There was the feeling of a body next to him, but that wasn’t too uncommon, so it took him a while before he carefully wiggled out of the loose grip around his waist and sat up, rubbing his head. He felt like he’d been hit by a train – or fucked by one – with how much his entire body ached and betrayed him.He finally forced his eyes open, looking down at the sleeping soundly beside him and… he froze. Takanori. He’d thought… Well, admittedly, he’d thought it was a dream. That Takanori had drunk-dialed him around the time he’d finished working, that he’d come here, that they'd– fuck. Fuck. Last night had been… ridiculous. And amazing. Absolutely amazing. He’d forgotten how much fun it was to have sex for… well, fun. Until now.Had he just ruined everything?Kouyou worried his lip. Had almost reached out to brush some of Takanori’s hair away from his face. Almost, started to even, before he caught himself and pulled back. Would he be upset with him? Maybe he wouldn’t care – maybe he and his husband had some open-relationship agreement or something and he just hadn’t realized it. He almost wished that was the case, because then he could feel a little better about Takanori’s husband hiring him, if that were the case… But he had a feeling it wasn’t.He didn’t regret sleeping with Takanori, not like he did sleeping with his husband, but if he lost Takanori because of it, it would be even worse.“…Taka?”The sound of his name earned a groggy little noise out of him, hellbent to keep his eyes closed. Takanori was dimly aware of the faint-nausea waiting for him to sit up all too fast and the brightness of the day being too much for his eyes that would feel like there was a little too much pressure behind them. “Kouyou,” Takanori echoed back after a moment, careful and slow. He peeked open an eye just to be sure of his surroundings. Kouyou’s heart felt as if it was lodged in his throat when their gazes met. He didn’t… look angry, despite the deep sigh he slowly exhaled with a slight shake of his head. Not that he could really tell, with how exhausted they both were. “Lay back down. I’m not talking about this while sitting up. I don’t have the strength to.” Kouyou managed a weak, exhausted chuckle, sliding back down to lay out next to Takanori again – not wrapped around each other like they were before – but Takanori’s fingers itched to trace his fingertips over Kouyou’s brow, down the slope of his nose and over his cupid’s bow like he had when they found themselves in the bathtub hours ago. Instead, his fingertips twitching softly against the pillow caught Kouyou’s attention. “…We were both– Pretty fucked up last night.” “To say the least,” Takanori agreed, joining in with his own weak, exhausted chuckle, rubbing the remaining sleep out of his eye with another deep sigh. His smile eased the small ache in Kouyou’s chest a little bit as they simply gazed at each other in the lulled silence they shared, tracing over a lone dusky patch of freckles on his cheek once his smile simmered down to just a faint yet soft tilt. “I won’t… say I regret it. I won’t say sorry. It isn’t a regret to me.” He reached out to rest his smaller hand atop of Kouyou’s, as if to further assure him as he shrugged a bare shoulder. Kouyou didn’t know why he expected Takanori to freak out. Having him admit that much was was more than he’d expected to get, but Takanori always surprised him. No matter how he insisted they couldn’t ever do this again was–No, that was fair. Perhaps sad, but fair. Of course they couldn’t. Takanori was married. Married to someone that was cheating on him, but–He wanted to tell him. He should tell him. Right now. Before things got more out of hand. “Taka-“ Kouyou started–“But I can’t do this again. Last night was amazing, but I just…” –but he let out a breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding, because he hadn’t known what he was going to say. He couldn’t tell him. He just couldn’t. “…Yeah.” It really had been amazing. Really, really amazing. It was a memory Kouyou was going to hold onto forever. “I get it.” He added gently, because he understood. Of course this couldn’t happen again. No matter how much the feeling of something sinking to the bottom in his gut wanted it to.Now that he knew he did… he didn’t know how he was going to function around Takanori. Knowing what he felt like, what he tasted like. How on earth was he going to go back to just being friends?Takanori worried his lip, his eyebrows furrowing in thought. “…If it makes anything difficult and awkward, I’ll understand. If you wanted to stop being friends.” Just saying it made Takanori’s throat constrict on itself, making the effort to swallow around it a touch difficult. Kouyou’s short answers were a little worrisome, and he didn’t even know if it was okay to touch him after everything, didn’t know what was fine and what wasn’t anymore. It would hurt a hell of a lot if Kouyou left, but he could live with it. It wouldn’t be anything he hasn’t picked himself up from before, after all, but this was different. The circumstances were so much more… complicated. “No,” Kouyou immediately argued, reaching for Takanori when Takanori started to retract his hand and carefully grabbed for his arm before thinking better of it and letting go. Touching wasn’t a good idea. They were both still naked and sticky and curled in just a little too close, even with how spacious the bed wazs. It was dangerous. If he said the wrong thing here, it would fuck him over. “God, no. I don’t want to stop being friends with you because we had amazing sex. That’s crazy.” He insisted, shaking his head and immediately regretting it. “I’m just– fuck, Taka. I’m so hung over. I think I’m dying.” He admitted, even if he knew that wasn’t really all of it. It was enough. He could shove down the rest, the ache in his chest, the want, the longing. The urge to curl back up around him, to tell him to remove the ring from around his finger and stay here, with him. And for what? He was a sex worker riding the line of an addict. Kouyou wasn’t a good boyfriend, an alright friend.He was a great one time, mad-at-your-husband-fuck. That was all he was good for. The last thing he needed was for Takanori to realize that.But he was rewarded a bubble of soft laughter when he just didn’t have the right words to say, and Kouyou relaxed under the blanket of Takanori’s warmth that draped over him as the back of Takanori’s hand brushed against his between them. “That makes the two of us.” Takanori quietly murmured with an amused smile, and Kouyou returned it with his very own.Once they stepped out of this room, it would be the end. They wouldn’t speak of it and never mention it to each other again. It was the best option for them both. Nothing could become anything more by default, so there was no need for him nor Kouyou to think otherwise. Not that Takanori thought he would, mind. He wasn’t that foolish to believe that Kouyou would want anything more, even if the circumstances were different. Besides, what else could Kouyou possibly say between the agreement on brunch and a shared bath? I haven’t had sex for fun since my divorce? Nope, too pathetic. You were perfect and your husband doesn’t deserve you? Also, a no. I think I’m in love with you?Hard. Fucking. No.And it probably wasn’t true, anyways. Sex did that, hormones and adrenaline having a track history of making the brain wonky. So what if he’d been feeling this warm ache in his chest long before they slept together? Long ago running from no one that chased them with laughter on their lips and snowflakes in their lungs; first love epiphanies under streetlights and missing heartbeats with a whispered goodnight tucked into the softest kiss he’d ever experienced outside of Takanori’s home doorstep after walking him home. That wasn’t for someone like him. Not anymore. He’d been foolish to think he could have it with Yuu; he would be even more of a fool to think he could have it with Takanori.But Kouyou could agree to food and a hot bath, to making Takanori laugh and flush all in the same breath when they mutually observed their collateral damage made last night to compare hickeys and marks and whistle at the scratch marks on Kouyou’s back that stung when he soaked in the hot bath. Perhaps it was because they wouldn’t ever sleep together again that it meant something nice. After all, Takanori certainly wasn’t trying to flatter him because he wanted to have sex again. He was the one who said they couldn’t. If Takanori wanted to, he would. Awful, he knew. But he’d always had a hard time saying no to him.They ate their respective breakfast into a comfortable lull of silence until they stretched out in a relaxed soak. It was exactly what their sore muscles needed. Once they were finished with their bath, Takanori stepped out first to retrieve towels and toss one Kouyou’s way after securing one around his waist and using another to dry his hair. Staying another night wasn’t an option on the table for him to take, despite Kouyou staying to rest. It wasn’t meant to be there in the first place. But if Kouyou had asked him to stay? If Kouyou stopped him in the middle of getting dressed, or further drying his hair, or from trying to find his goddamn panties – he found them on the balcony draped on the railing; Kouyou laughed until his sides hurt – and so much as suggested he stay another night?

He didn’t know. He truly didn’t knowIt never came. Even when he asked Kouyou to fasten his necklace around his neck.

“I’ll text you the moment I get home and my phone’s charged,” Takanori promised as he adjusted his shoe whilst making his way to the door. The damn thing had died in the middle of the night and he’d had to see about taking a taxi back home. He didn’t mind it, though. Kouyou paid for his ride last night, and he wouldn’t let him do it again.“Alright. Are you sure you don’t want me to take care of your ride?” Kouyou asked curiously, shifting off the bed adorned in one of the hotel’s white, fluffy robes to see Takanori off. He’d kept a considerable distance while he looked for his things until he was completely dressed, but now that he was and it was obvious he was leaving he could approach him, walk him to the door at least.

Takanori shook his head and mustered up a small smile as he looked up at Kouyou and paused in the doorway. After this, he was closing the book and he didn’t plan on reopening it. But… he could leave something to seal it closed, couldn’t he? Something that was nice and itching insistently at his gut.

Before he thought too much about it, he reached to rest his hand at the crook of Kouyou’s neck and pushed up to meet the gentle, downward pull he coaxed Kouyou to lower in halfway into hugging him goodbye, and pressed a lingering kiss to the corner of his mouth, leaving behind a kiss print in its wake when he pulled back slowly. Gentle. Like flowers kept forever, tucked away in an old book.

“Take care, Shima,” He murmured close to his skin, absently stroking his thumb across the nape of his neck.

“I’ll see you soon,” Kouyou promised, resisting the urge to lean into that touch for a moment longer before Takanori let him go and stepped right out. The door swung close with a sound of finality and he stood there for a moment or two longer, just staring at the closed hotel door before passing a frustrated hand through his hair, helpless to the soft tremble that seeped into his deep sigh as he pressed his fingertips gingerly to his eyes and squeezed the bridge of his nose under the realization that he had almost turned his head to kiss him; almost asked him to stay. Asked him to stay. Not just for tonight, but longer. To make that jog out and stop him from getting into the elevator in nothing but the robe on his back and the hangover clinging to his bones and tell him to stay here, with him. Just him.“Fuck.”He was in love with Takanori. Again. That hadn’t ended well for him when he was eighteen, and it wouldn’t end well for him now.

After all, love wasn’t for people like him.

#Uruki #uruhaxruki #one-shot #I love you B I swear it #you asked for angst and I gave it to you ewjmoikdew #is it bad enough that I have 3 parts for this?#dreizehnn

5 notes · View notes