#but i can't help it that friends to lovers is MY bread and butter

[dylanconrique]

they really weren't kidding about the rom-com vibes in this season.

[eatbread-besoft]

it occurs to me, after thirty minutes standing at the stove caramelizing onions, that I love cooking.

I recently mentioned to a friend that I wished my parents taught me more about cooking when I was growing up. he was surprised; he assumed my parents had taught me. well, sort of, I told him. my parents made sure I knew how to feed myself, how to prepare dinner for the family, how to chop and peel and boil and roast. what I meant, though, was that I wished they'd taught me how to love food and prepare food I loved.

my mother did not teach me to caramelize onions. my father did not teach me to make a meatless meal. my parents did not teach me how to make vegetables interesting, or how to create balanced meals that satisfy emotionally as well as physically, and they certainly did not show me the simple pleasure of homemade bread and real butter. (we were a margarine household. NEVER AGAIN.)

the last time I had friends over, this was the menu:

penne with scrambled tofu in a roasted red pepper & garlic sauce

creamy carrot soup with peasant bread for dipping

apple galette and vanilla ice cream

I am very much a home cook. my meals are elevated basics, nothing too fancy. but they do take time. and it is one of the best ways I spend my time.

so I can't help but think, what would have happened if I'd found this love earlier? it was only in my mid-twenties, after I bought a home and had my own kitchen, that I really embraced cooking. but what if it had been during my teen years? what if I could have processed my big feelings in the kitchen? what if mealtimes were sacred? what if I hadn't tracked all those goddamn calories for all those years???

I know not everyone will love cooking. I sometimes hesitate to talk about the life-changing impact it's had on my life, lest I sound like I'm proselytizing. but I was standing in my kitchen after a long day at work, caramelizing onions...and I felt so at peace. when my friends were at my kitchen table, eating my apple galette, I felt contented.

all I want, truly, is to find a lover I can invite into my kitchen who will recognize it as a site of peace and pleasure.

[saveourskinship]

Thankathankathank youuuuu @akorah for the tag 🥰

Three Ships:

Dramione. Because kissing someone furiously while grumpily saying "You. It's you. It's always you but... Why does it have to be you" is my jam, bread, butter, marmalade and vegemite [marmite if you're heathen ie smutty]

Zutara. Because they make each other better. They move each other forward. Because fire. Because water. Because lightning. Because ice. Because scars. Because healing. Because because because.

Skam and Beadie. This is cheating because they are original characters I am writing. They are not even a couple but God help me am I the hell leaving space to write my own fanfiction about them. Maybe an HEA where they don't all die at the end. *shrugs*

First Ship:

In anything: Barbie and Action Man. Before I was even in school my sister and I would steal our brother's Action Man as Barbie's partner. Ken's job was Beach. Our Barbie needed a man with a plan.

In media: Sora/Kairi from Kingdom Hearts. I used to devour fanfic about them. Shout out to the one which sticks in my brain and introduced me to My Chemical Romance when Kairi got married to Squall because of something to do with Mickey being an little shitprick which I think was because of some soul signature nonsense? I can't remember and anyway Demolition Lovers was their wedding song and the bane of my mother's existence - Save's Emo Phase was born.

Last Song:

Girls Like You - The Naked and Famous (shit, this is actually a lie, but it's the last 'proper' song I listened to since I don't count the demo I'm making for my friend's satire girlpunk band she decided to create last night as a real song yet. It just has boop-boop-boops. Night Lunch can pull off songs with only doof-doofs and boom-booms. I cannot. So the demo won't be real until Sasha does the drums at least.)

Last Movie:

What A Girl Wants. Look. It's Amanda Bynes. I love Amanda Bynes. It is also Colin Firth and blue blood upper crust English vibes (done poorly, sure, but still). The last chapter of rose-petal compliments is needing all the help I can get it right now.

Currently Reading:

Harrow the Ninth - Tamsyn Muir

Lesbian necromancers in space. Need there be another reason?

Currently Watching:

Jujitsu Kaisen Season Two (Gojo, my love. I salivate, I wither, I breathe so much ecstasy I lack oxygen and die.)

Taskmaster NZ (rewatch. Like, no shade to my country or anything [said under the world's largest umbrella] but fuck we're shit.)

Last Thing I Wrote:

Like, as in finished? Because otherwise it would be this, right?

I wrote delivery instructions for a food order earlier today. Can't have done it very well because the driver still got confused and had to call me.

In terms of Things with Titles that are Complete™️, then an original folktale called.... fuck, what did I call it? I can't remember. It's about an unnamed protagonist and a boatman though. Still waiting on my rejection emails from the magazines I've submitted it to 😂

Currently Writing:

Let's skip over the arseholiness of me saying that I'm currently writing this again, shall we? (Let's not turtles-all-the-way-down my mentioning it either.)

Okay. Here we go:-

rose-petal compliments: dramione. Quiet luxury, Hermione is wealthy. Set in the Muggle world.

sacreligious inferences of a midnight paradise: dramione. Trope soup. Marriage law/fake dating/date or die. (Plus a bunch more tropes because why not?)

The Absolute and Total Defeat of One Draco Malfoy. Multi-ship. Crack. Crack from crest to cunt.

What's Owed When. Dramione. Unexpected Pregnancy. France. Delectomancy. Draco pines so hard he's basically a forest.

foil&fall. Tansy (Teddy Lupin/Pansy Parkinson). Fluff. Epistolary.

Untitled warfic. Dramione. My attempt at All Plot, No Vibes. Yes, you read that right. I'm trying to write something with NO VIBES ALL PLOT. (Draw a pentagram and sage for me, I bloody need it.)

The Environmental Suicide Club. Original YA speculative fiction. This is the one Skam and Beadie are from. Grief. Environmentalism. Nihilism. Set one generation in the future. Everyone dies at the end. A Fun, Very Good Time! Completely unmarketable! Wheeee!

Untitled socmed. Theomione. Writing this one with @they-call-me-megs A bunch of fun and one we return to when we're struggling for inspiration elsewhere.

Aster, the Star-Sailor. Original children's series. Sci-fi, pirate adventure. Came from writing the Tansy and I fell in love with it. Thanks, Pansy.

Fate and Free Will series. Urban fantasy six-book series. Currently undertaking a massive rework of the structure.

wander/wonder. A Luna Lovegood POV story Christmas visual novel. Story is written and am hoping I can finish the video in time for December.

There are a few more but these are the ones I work on a least a little bit every week.

Tagging @they-call-me-megs @thusatlas @paandreablack

[mnoaeiu]

“friends don't kiss each other like that”

pairing: childe x gn!reader

tags: modern au, college au, roommate childe, weapon mentions (taser) but no one gets hurt lol, fluff, friends to lovers, not proofread

━━━━━━━━━━━━━

the sound of metal clanking and plastics ruffling woke you up from your slumber. you rubbed your eyes before glancing at your clock, showing 3:43 a.m. after hearing that sound again, fear washes through you. you reached for the drawer on your bedside table, searching for the taser that your roommate,p childe, gave you as a gift last christmas. at first, you find it ridiculous that he gave you a taser as a christmas gift, but he reasoned out that he wants you to protect yourself— and also it makes you think of him if you ever use it. you remind yourself to thank childe yet again as your hand grasped the said thing.

childe would have been facing the intruder head-on if not for the fact that he went home to his family to spend the week-long break. now that you're home alone with only a taser to protect you, you pray to anyone listening to not let this be your last day.

you made your way towards the source of the noise after weapping yourself in your robe. slowly and quietly, your feet dragged you towards the kitchen. you raised your hand and turned on the taser, hearing it make little electric noises.

you spotted the man rummaging through your kitchen cabinet below the counter, crouching down with head hung low, blocking his face. you walked behind him quietly, and as you were about to push the taser on his body, he stood up holding a pan, his ginger hair now in full view.

“childe?!” you gasped. he quickly turned around and once he spotted you, his lips turned into a grin as he wrapped his arms around you.

“y/n!” he exclaimed rather enthusiastucally, as if he didn't scared the hell out of you.

“what are you doing at this time?! you scared me!”

you turned off the taser before placing it on the counter, wriggling away from childe.

“aw, come on! i just came home and this is how you greet me?” he faked a pout and clutched his chest using his free hand, acting very hurt. “still, i'm glad you brought your taser with you. wouldn't want anyone to hurt you, now, would ya?”

“oh, shut up. i thought you'll not be home until tomorrow?” you crossed your arm in front of your chest, raising your eyebrow.

he gave you a sheepish smile, “well, yeah, but i realized that since tomorrow is the last day of the break, why not spend it with you? besides, we haven't really spent time together after the exams.”

your heart fluttered at his words. as you felt your cheeks heat up, you quickly averted your gaze.

“really?” you hated how your voice sound, a hopeful tone lacing it.

“of course! you're my friend!”

friend, right.

you cleared your throat, masking the hurt behind your eyes.

“whatever. what were you trying to cook, anyway?”

“oh, right! we don't have any more cereals left so i thought i'd cook something from the fridge. i didn't really get to eat dinner.” he showed you his signature smile but you can't help but notice the bags under his eyes and how his face shows sign of exhaustion. he must be tired from driving, his homeplace is far from where your university is after all.

“go sit there. i'll cook something for us.” you sighed before grabbing the pan in his hands, placing it on the stove.

you opened the fridge to grab some ingredients to use. you frowned as you saw the half-empty fridge in front of you. seems like you do need to do some grocery shopping later.

“will grilled cheese be okay? we do not have a lot left...”

“it's fine, as long as you made it!” you rolled your eyes at his flirty remark. of course, he's childe, what do you expect.

you turned on the stove before placing a slice of butter, letting it melt for a second. you reached for the bread on the kitchen counter, but before you could place it on the pan, you felt childe's arms wrap around your waist.

“c-childe?” you called out softly, frozen from his sudden show of affection. sure, he hugged you before and has always been touchy with you, but you never felt his touch this... intimate.

“i missed you,” he whispered, burrying his face on your hair. you felt your cheeks blushed once again from his actions, your heartbeat quickened and warmth spread all over your body. you can't fight off the smile that creeps up your face as you realize just how domestic and intimate your situation was.

“i... i missed you too,” you mumbled. now that you mentioned it, it does feel a little lonely without childe annoying you every single time he finds the chance. “now get off me because i'm trying to do something,” you commanded, though you can't lie that you'll miss his warmth if he ever complies.

“that can wait.” he turned off the stove before spinning you around to face him.

“w-what are y-”

“can i kiss you?”

stunned at his bluntness, your mouth fell agape as you stared at him in shock.

“what?!” now you're certain that you are blushing twice as hard as before.

“can i kiss you?” he leaned in a little, his eyes locked with yours to read your expression. “please?”

unable to control yourself anymore, you wrapped your arms around his neck and pushed him towards you. you closed your eyes once you felt his lips on yours, humming in contentment. he smirked in the kiss before he grabbed your thighs to lift you up and place you on the kitchen counter. he placed himself in between your legs, wrapping his arms around your waist to press his bidy closer to yours. your lips moved in sync, feeling little butterflies fluttering in your chest. you always wondered what it's like to kiss childe, and now that it is happening, you don't ever want to stop.

your hand moved to cup his cheeks, the other finding its way to play with his hair. eventually, you both have to part for air. you whined, already missing the way his lips move with yours.

“if i had known this is what it feels like to kiss you, i would have done it before,” he chuckled, his eyes staring at yours with full of love and adoration. he noticed how your expression mirrored his and he can't help how his chest seemingly erupt in pure joy.

“i believe friends don't kiss each other like that,” you giggled, looking at childe softly. your thumb ran across his cheeks, caressing it lovingly. you sighed happily as he leaned in to your touch.

“no, they don't,” he said, a toothy grin appearing on his face. his gaze fell down to your lips before leaning in to connect your lips with his once more, sharing another sweet kiss.