#but i did do a single-card one some months back while struggling with job applications & pulled Strength

[unnonexistence]

ah shit i should have asked for a tarot deck for christmas

[dragonbstoned]

Okay, so I know that this is INCREDIBLY long, but *please* read to the end. Everything is such a wreck that I have no options but to essentially beg for help.

This isn't just long but also kind of complicated to explain, but I'm not going to simply accept possible assistance from complete without giving the full scope of the situation. Honestly, it's next to impossible to understand how it ended up here without the full story anyway.

Literally everything this year has gotten progressively worse the longer it's dragged on and I'm so desperate that I don't know what the fuck to do anymore... I'm fucking broken and out of ideas. I hate asking for help, but I'm literally out of options, and reaching out on other platforms/to the community I've grown up in has been completely useless...

Currently, I'm struggling to just be able to *survive* and at risk of being homeless, which is made even worse by my partner and our cat (who is on a prescription diet and we'd already cut back significantly to make sure he was properly taken care of leading up to this) are in the same boat... I'm disabled and *can't* work while also waiting on my appeal for rejection to be examined by an actual person. It's been over a year since the rejection and subsequent appeal. If that wasn't enough, my partner has been searching for a job for the entirety of the year, especially since their unemployment ran out, but NO ONE is hiring. This isn't an exaggeration either. They've gone on sites, put in applications, and made calls only to be told that they aren't *actually* hiring. They've even gone on interviews that have gone nowhere. They've tried *everything*, working on applications and making calls to follow up on them literally every single day for MONTHS, and it's been useless so far. This is NOT due to a lack of effort. I've seen firsthand how much it's wrecked them, and it even caused *significant* strain on our relationship a few months ago.

They haven't stopped looking for a job either. It just *isn't* happening, and this is where things start to REALLY go downhill...

The man who tries to call himself my father recently received some financial assistance from his parents due to him being out of a job from his own negligence, with the intention of it being for MY rent (this was explicitly mentioned and the funds were offered due to that), only for him to turn around and immediately steal the majority of the money to waste on himself. (About 1200 bucks, 2k was sent, I only ever saw a quarter of it.) He essentially used it to pay off something that was NOT necessary and the only reason I can say it SO definitively is because I've been the one budgeting money for him for the last decade because, despite him being a nearly 57 year old man, he has no idea how to and never has. It genuinely feels as if he intentionally refuses to learn as well. Everyone around him has tried, for 34 years (on the part of my mother anyway), and it's never gone well. To give you a better idea, this man actively REFUSED to apply for unemployment when I was a child, and my mother had to be the one to do this. It's also not the first time he's tried to get out of paying for something he's responsible for/committed to of his own free will.

He's been lording my partner's lack of a job over their head for MONTHS now despite being the one to tell us not to worry about their half of the rent and that he'd cover it for as long as it was needed. To his credit, he did follow through on this until he also lost his job, which was, again, due to his own negligence. During the earlier portion of this period of uncertainty, our bank also suffered a ransomware attack that left us incapable of tracking our finances for the better part of a month. My biological paternal donor also told me that I should simply keep using my own card despite not being able to transfer funds into the account during this... which left me with about $1500 in debt and forced me to take out an emergency personal loan in order to prevent my account from being closed down. He'd promised that he would handle the full thing when he was capable of doing so, only to immediately blame me for the position he forced me into accepting.

On top of that, we've recently learned he's essentially completely fabricated almost every aspect of his life for as long as I've been alive. This has caused a number of issues, the main one being that I've been forced to cut him off as he's turned verbally, mentally, and emotionally abusive towards me for no reason. It's gotten so bad that I actually ended up blocking him on everything so that I could focus on trying to keep my partner and I housed.

I've been working on trying to fix it, but I'm currently behind on rent as I've been incapable of paying this month (November) and most certainly will not have the ability to do so on the first to keep us here another month. We pay 1k per month for a 12'x12' room in a rather hostile house. We've been attempting to leave since before my partner was released from their last job during a probationary period. They got some holiday work at the end of last year, but clearly, it wasn't going to help us out long-term. And as I've said, they've been unable to find a job since.

As if all of THAT wasn't bad enough, my partner's phone incredibly damaged, but now it's gotten far worse to the point that their lock/power button is no longer functioning properly. Their phone has had issues for months, but we haven't been able to afford to replace it as we've been more focused on keeping a roof over our heads... I'm able to get them a new one through our phone plan where we can pay it off monthly. However, we can't even afford the tax on the new device in order for me to do that. I've tried to find a way to make it happen but now it's completely unavoidable. If they don't have a phone, they'll have even less capability of finding a job as they won't be able to contact or be contacted by possible employers.

Honestly, I don't even know how much we need, I'm at the point of taking anything we can get in terms of assistance... Both of us are already getting our respective assistance from the county, but it doesn't really solve the housing problem, so we need to figure out how to get as much of our rent/bills paid as soon as possible because we're due to get an eviction notice at pretty much any moment. There is nowhere else for us to go currently as we still haven't been paired up with our housing navigation specialist through the county so fighting tooth and nail to stay here is literally our ONLY option right now.

I'm going to drop payment handles/links below... I know that this has been a lot to read, and if you stuck it out to the end, thank you so much. Even if you can't help financially, I would appreciate it if you could at least share this around and boost it to as many people as possible... We just need any form of help we can get at this point.

The following are the payment options that I have access to currently, I haven't set up a gofundme or anything (as they do take a portion of the money) and I just *can't* afford to have that happen right now as we've been counting literal pennies for months. I will not provide my Zelle as that is incredibly sensitive information, and I'm not comfortable putting that out there as it could fuck me over financially or even reveal information that I've worked very hard to keep private from certain people who will abuse it. (Please forgive the PayPal username not matching. It's an incredibly old account, and I no longer use the handle for my other profiles or accounts in any way.)

CashApp: https://cash.app/$dragonbstoned

Paypal: https://www.paypal.me/DragonChild42

Venmo: https://venmo.com/code?user_id=2835216225796096270&created=1731911514

Again, I understand if people aren't able to help financially, but PLEASE share this to boost it as much as possible. I'm just incredibly desperate and lost as to the possible solutions here.

[hualianff]

Vampire/Human AU

(Slight NSFW, angst)

Thinking about vampire HC who owns a vampire-friendly bar with humans who apply as donors to supply fresh blood for vampires willing to pay the expensive prices. When a human with beautiful amber eyes, soft facial features, and blood that smells absolutely delectable, walks in, every vampire whips their heads towards the door. The human approaches one of the staff, YY, to inquire about becoming a donor. HC watches as the enticing morsel follows YY into a room to finalize his application.

Right after the human leaves thirty minutes later–YY probably having said it would take a few days to find him a match–HC pulls YY aside, demanding to have a look over the papers the new donor filled out. After a quick scan, HC shoves the papers back to YY with a click of his tongue,

“No need to find him a match. He’s mine.”

A human whose blood smells heavenly, who has never been bitten or even nipped by a vampire. HC wants to corrupt him. Ruin him.

The next night, HC has the human, XL, meet him in his personal feeding room. There’s a luxurious velvet couch to the side, a pristine glass table with fancy wine and glasses, and a king-sized bed with crimson silk laid upon the mattress.

HC, like most vampires, typically feeds while stimulating their donors. This can be done with something as simple as kissing or full-on intercourse. Not only does this relax the human’s nerves so they won’t tense up before being bitten, but the toxins injected into their system after being bitten feels incredibly euphoric, serving as a kind of aphrodisiac. Many humans donate their blood in this way for the sole reason of attaining this heightened sense of pleasure.

But as soon as XL enters the room in front of HC, his mind freezes as he sees the bed.

“I’m a virgin,” he blurts out, wide eyes panicked as he looks at the vampire. HC raises his eyebrow, unperturbed.

“We can work with that.”

XL gulps.

“I’ve also never kissed anyone.”

HC runs a tongue along his sharp fangs.

“Do you want to change that?” The vampire asks, walking up behind the human, pressing his chest against XL’s back. HC hears XL’s heart rate pick up at the proposition. It’s an unspoken yes, though XL also imperceptibly nods his head. He does not see HC’s lips spread into a vicious grin. However, XL does feel lips brush against the shell of his ear, sending shivers down his spine.

“Use your words, precious. Do you want to be kissed? Want to be touched, experience pleasure beyond comprehension?” HC murmurs, skimming his lips across XL’s nape. “I can fuck you too. Push into your little body as I sink my fangs into your neck. I’d place them right here-“ HC taps XL’s jugular, the human jerking to the side with a gasp. “-oh? So sensitive. All the better. I can make you feel so good.”

XL’s breath quickens, ever so slightly leaning back into HC’s tall frame. HC leans forward to catch a glimpse of those doe eyes regarding him with caution. Oh, how he wants to eat this human alive. HC turns XL around by his shoulders. He lowers his head to bump foreheads with XL, forcing the human to look into his red-tinged eyes.

“Is that a yes?”

XL blinks those doe eyes once, then twice.

“Yes.”

HC brings his hand up to brush a hair away from the human’s head.

“Wonderful.”

***

XL is at the point in his life when he lost everything. He chose to pursue a career outside of his parents’ embroidery business despite being expected to take over the shop after college. Abandoning college altogether, XL went off on his own to chase his dream to become a singer.

A few years later, where XL was provinces away from home, XL’s parents’ business had gone under, devastating them as they could no longer pay for their medical bills. Upon hearing the news, XL rushed back home to take care of them. It seemed they had kept their declining health conditions under wraps. They were too prideful to admit their weakening physical states; they also did not want to guilt XL into giving up on his ambitions to take care of them.

XL’s parents lasted one year before passing away, his father first due to prostate cancer, his mother one month later after succumbing to exhaustion and grief. XL lost their home along with the shop merely a week later, unable to pay off the debt. His parents had used up their savings for their medical expenses and XL had been scraping by as a musician for years. Additionally, there was no one he could confide in. He had lost contact with his friends as he moved from city to city, busking on streets, attempting to catch the attention of music labels.

XL was utterly alone. There were days when not even music could bring an ounce of comfort. However, music was the thing that kept him sane between the various side jobs he managed to pick up to keep him off the streets.

As if the fates decided XL had had enough bad luck for a lifetime, a CEO of a fairly well-known label offered him a business card after a busking session. It was JW of Capital Records who gave XL hope of achieving his dream. XL spent most of his late 20s under the label, training and practicing and producing. He had the chance to record a couple of singles and one mini-album–which he didn’t get to participate much in the production side–but other than that, XL didn’t make it far. He was tremendously overworked and yet, still discarded to the side.

Wondering why he wasn’t provided the opportunities other artists received to further their careers, XL scheduled a one-on-one meeting with the CEO to ask what he was lacking. JW had insisted he could give XL more opportunities if XL could offer something more than just his serene vocals and pretty face.

The unspoken suggestion that XL offer up his body pierced his heart with yet another stake. Overwhelming disappointment and betrayal crashed into XL, but perhaps he should have known better that the whole situation was too good to be true. XL vehemently rejected this idea, angering JW who eventually tore XL down to the point of a medical emergency that allowed him to leave the agency without repercussions.

At age thirty-two, XL was left with no family, mental and physical trauma, and a dying will. Ironically enough, the song lyrics he’d written after experiencing so much loss were the closest thing to making music he’d gotten. But in the end, XL still felt like a failure.

Now in Xi’an, XL was left with limited options to earn money for rent. He already worked two part-time jobs in addition to writing music—though even time set aside for this has dwindled.

One night, as XL was walking home after closing up the convenience store, he saw the neon lights of the sign “Ghost City.” He’s heard many things about this club and is no stranger to the existence of nonhuman creatures roaming amongst human society. After hours of research, XL decided to apply to become a blood donor. It’s not like he had a better option that paid more anyway.

XL’s hope to somehow redeem his past actions has all but fizzled out. He doesn’t expect a vampire like HC to care about his comfort or consent when feeding, though HC still prioritizes these things for some reason.

XL has never looked at his body and thought about the best ways to pleasure himself. HC shows him how. HC caresses and kisses XL like he’s worth being handled with care; HC also invades XL’s body as a threat to break it, broadcasting a vampire’s strength, speed, and endurance in the bedroom.

XL can go as far as to say he even looks forward to his time with HC. In between a busy work life and dealing with people who would rather look the other way than give him the time of day, XL’s mind and body steadily weaken.

It starts with memory loss, where XL can’t clearly remember the conversations he’d had the day before. One of the reasons this develops is because he goes through many days without having anyone to tell about his day. It’s like the life XL lives is so insignificant, nothing about it is worth remembering.

Then, it’s the lack of eating. Most of XL’s money goes towards rent, essentials, and groceries. But he’s not a great cook. And he’s already drained by the time he gets home after working both jobs and visiting Ghost City. XL’s stress doesn’t help, adding to the fatigue that gradually shuts his body down.

While HC might not be able to taste a difference in XL’s blood, he does notice how frail the human moves around. How delayed XL responds, more so than he should be–even as a human. XL has scheduled more visits: three times a week this time. However, his words become less. He stops telling the little stories that brought a small smile to his face. XL doesn’t even mention the songs he’s been working on lately.

HC forces himself to ask about them after an especially rough coupling.

“How’s the songwriting going, darling?” HC asks quietly. He props his elbow upon his pillow, resting his cheek on his hand as he intently observes the human struggling to catch his breath, eyelids fluttering.

“I haven’t written anything new,” XL breathily answers. HC purses his lips. He ducks down to affectionately tongue at the skin his fangs pierced.

“No? In how long?” HC asks. XL sighs heavily.

“Maybe three weeks.”

HC doesn’t know what to say to that. He’s not one to console anybody. No one had afforded him that luxury, and naturally, he did not grant anyone else his concern. The silence that follows is unbearable.

***

The next time XL visits, he’s the one to initiate their first kiss. HC growls happily against his human’s lips, pinning him against the closed door of his private room. XL moans obscenely as HC languidly licks into his mouth. His arms desperately wrap around HC’s neck to bring him closer.

“Someone’s eager,” HC says with a chuckle as he pulls back. XL instantly attaches his lips to the vampire’s jaw, peppering light kisses along the pale skin. HC can’t help but think he’s taught his little human well. XL hums while trailing his lips back to HC’s, capturing them in a kiss that’s the sweetest one yet.

HC should’ve noticed how unstable XL’s legs seemed, how dreadful the bags under his eyes looked before indulging in their bedroom activities. He should’ve kept track all along of how thin XL is, how much more skin and bone he had become. HC is certainly not one to intrude on someone else’s life and scrutinize all their choices. But he should’ve said something sooner.

Maybe then, XL’s heart wouldn’t have stuttered so violently, or completely stopped beating for five counts.

HC watches in horror as XL’s eyes roll into the back of his head. His human’s body goes limp in his arms, collapsing into HC’s chest. When XL’s heart beat starts up again, it’s very weak. There’s a noticeable abnormality in its rhythm.

HC quickly gathers XL in his arms and speeds to the bed. He sits back against the pillow, placing XL to recline against his front. HC hooks his arms around XL’s middle from behind, anxiously listening to XL’s irregular heartbeat that seems like it takes all of his human’s energy to pump. Luckily, XL awakens a few minutes later. He registers a cold embrace and warm puffs of breath lingering near his ear.

“Did I pass out?” XL wheezes out, unconsciously melting into the body behind him.

“Yes,” HC says tightly. “Your heartbeat is uneven. Something is wrong.”

XL can’t tell if he’s imagining it but that sounded like worry in the vampire’s tone.

“Oh.”

HC inhales sharply.

“You just fainted, Xie Lian. Hell, your heart just stopped for a few seconds, and all you have to say is ‘oh?’” HC grinds out.

So he is upset. XL swallows thickly, not wanting to escalate things and further upset the vampire.

“It’s okay,” XL says. “I’m okay-“

“No. You’re not,” HC interrupts.

XL takes a deep breath, wincing slightly as HC tightens his arms around his hips. He’s more sensitive than normal, XL realizes. Before XL can defend himself further, HC grasps XL’s chin and turns his head to face the vampire.

“You’re hiding something from me,” he states. He hears XL’s heart speed up. “There’s no use in lying. I can tell you’ve grown weaker since you first came.”

“Well, I have been donating my blood to a certain vampire for a few months now. I’m bound to be a bit weak in my legs,” XL replies as a matter of factly. He means to poke fun at the situation rather than acknowledge the severity of it. HC knows this because he’s done it numerous times himself. But when XL does it, it makes HC’s blood boil.

“Are you saying I am causing this- this deterioration in your health?” HC asks tensely. XL lets out a gasp, whirling around in HC’s arms, immediately backpedaling.

“No! No, not at all.”

HC’s eyes assess his human who trembles slightly in his arms. He cradles XL in between his legs, hands shifting XL further up his body so he can rest his head on HC’s chest. HC gently pets XL’s hair, an action that was uncharacteristic of him months ago, before XL had walked through the entrance of his bar.

XL gently smiles in an attempt to placate the vampire.

HC’s eyes flash a frightening scarlet.

“I don’t believe you.”

XL’s face crumples.

“It’s true! I’ve just been really busy is all. Work has been hectic and- and-“ gone is the innocence that HC once saw in XL’s doe eyes, instead replaced by stress and utter brokenness that alarms the vampire to no end. A voice in the back of HC’s head snarls that those emotions had always been behind XL’s eyes; they were simply better hidden, and HC had been too lust-driven to notice.

XL continues his rambling, frantically shaking his head. “-I took some extra shifts because I needed the money to pay for some water damage that flooded half my apartment. I’m fine—truly.“

If HC had a beating heart, it would have dropped down to his stomach at the sudden realization. His fingers dig into the paper-thin skin of XL’s hips, then trace up the bony knobs of his spine.

“You’re not eating right.”

“Wait- S-san Lang-“

The nickname HC had asked XL to call him is hurdled back into his face like a stone aimed to shatter. It sounds like a cry for help.

“And you’re not getting enough sleep,” HC concludes with a disapproving frown. His eyes now glow a deep crimson, matching the silken sheets that HC ensures are in perfect condition every time XL visits.

“Fuck, XIE LIAN, you know you need proper nutrition and rest to recover from each night you spend with me!” HC is nearly shouting now, voice wavering out of his control. Who knew another creature could make him feel so strongly?

“I-I am!”

“I SAID NOT TO LIE TO ME. I CAN TELL WHEN YOU’RE NOT BEING HONEST,” HC explodes, spatting those words with a poison that he often uses with uncooperative subordinates, but never directed at XL before.

Tears glisten in XL’s eyes as he’s cornered with no way out, no relief from the building pressure that suffocates him. Right now, after everything XL has been through, this seems to be his tipping point. He never expected HC to care this much. Or perhaps HC is just concerned his reliable supply of blood is flaking out on him, just when he’s had a feasible taste.

XL is sure HC has plenty of other donors to feed on. It’s not like XL is particularly special in that way. Frankly speaking, XL had time and time again asked the universe to give him one last sign that his life mattered in some capacity. But if he couldn’t see the value in his own life, who else could?

XL scrambles off from HC’s lap, allowing himself to speak with the deep-seated spite that has grown in his heart like an untamable weed.

“THERE’S NO NEED TO GET SO WORKED UP OVER MY HEALTH!! I’LL BE GONE SOON ANYWAY! THE DOCTOR GAVE ME THREE MORE MONTHS,” XL screams, having to catch his breath after exerting so much power into his voice. “So there. You have my answer. I’m not lying this time. Just one a couple more months and then- then you won’t have to deal with my shit anymore, okay?”

HC can’t move. He can’t speak either. The shock taking over his system renders his mind and body completely useless. He can only stare blankly at XL whose tears now cascade down his cheeks.  

No, this cannot be happening-

XL’s whimpers pull HC out of his head. The human hugs his own frail body, shivering from a coldness that does not exist in the room.

How did HC let it get so bad?

“I’m sick, San Lang. Very, very sick. Not just physically,” XL whispers defeatedly, letting out a small hiccup.

HC doesn’t hesitate to surge forward to throw his arms around XL, hugging him once more. It’s a habit now—to hold XL whenever he could. Now, HC wonders how many more times he would get this chance before it was inevitably the last.

“Xie Lian…”

“I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I-I just can’t eat. Sometimes from stress, other times I completely forget. And I want to rest, but I end up laying in bed awake for hours a-and my mind just won’t let me sleep-”

For the first time in over a decade, there is someone else to hear XL’s agonized wails.

“Please believe me, San Lang. Please."

[fusion-ego]

So... 2019, huh?

((LONG post ahead!))

This year has really been something, hasn’t it? I had to quit my second job ever because of my back problems (along with other shit lol), I hardly wrote anything all year, and I started in on my Bachelor’s degree. I moved 1600 miles cross-country to Arizona and I’ve been down here for six months now! I had to leave my Markiplier Nudes Calendar™ back in Illinois because I forgot to take it off my wall before I left and it probably got thrown away by the landlord :c, I let my parents borrow a credit card for the move down here and went into debt as a result of almost single-handedly financing the move, had several breakdowns, and despite my best attempts I haven’t been able to get a job yet, but I’m still trying!

A lot of things happened this year.

I turned 20.

I started liking myself again after years of literally hating myself and that quickly advanced to me loving myself again. Turns out I’m pretty cool, even if I am annoying as fuck.

Turns out that having primarily depressive episodes and not having the motivation or desire to take care of myself doesn’t make me any less of a person. It doesn’t make my struggles invalid just because I’m the one not taking care of myself. It turns out, taking care of yourself is fucking hard sometimes, especially if the combined symptoms of your mental and physical ailments put you in a position where everything feels like too much.

It also turns out that taking care of yourself is difficult when you’ve spent your entire life (or at least the parts where you actually had friends) putting all of the wants and needs of your friends and loved ones above your own.

Taking care of yourself is hard when you were raised to be The Strong One, who doesn’t break down and who doesn’t have any issues, thanks. The one who, sure, they haven’t showered in a week and they feel like crap because they haven’t eaten, but you don’t need to know that! You just go eat and take a shower, hun, The Strong One is okay.

It took until this year for me to learn that being The Strong One didn’t mean I couldn’t break down sometimes. It didn’t mean I couldn’t take time for myself and that I had to be available all the time for my friends. Setting boundaries has been a learning experience for me and everyone else in my friend group, I think. I think I’ve cried more this year than I have since I was a kid, and you know what that is? Growth.

And honestly, I’ve really gotta thank my lovely fiance @goreyglitches for some of that. I am petrified of crying when anyone can see or hear me. I was raised to be The Strong One and The Strong One doesn’t cry. I conditioned myself to not be a “crybaby” and to never, ever, ever cry. And I know that’s bad - repressing negative emotions just makes it worse in the long-run. I figured that out with anger and tried to fix it long before I tried to fix the crying issue, and this year? This year Tobi’s helped a lot. I trust him, and I feel safe with him, so when he shuts the door and pulls the covers over us and holds me and tells me it’s okay to cry, I cry. And I am so grateful to him for that I don’t think I even have words.

And @ashencreations has been a wonderful friend this year, as always, even if both of us have been having issues this year. They’ve, I think, been one of the people I vented to the absolute most and they’ve been a real peach about it and even if I don’t have a whole lot of energy to talk sometimes (most of the time) they still love me and are accommodating of my issues. That’s pretty cool! I know a lot of people who can’t talk to people they’ve dated in the past and I have to admit I wouldn’t have been surprised if we fell out this year, but here we are - finishing another year as best friends. They let me have my space and they check in to make sure I’ve eaten and slept and showered. And I try to do the same but my check-ins have been a little lackluster this year while I find my boundaries so oops for that. I’ll try harder next year!

And really, I have to thank everyone who’s stuck with me through this year. My friends and my followers and even just folks who know me because I’m mutuals with someone they’re friends with - all of you. I know this year has sucked and I’ve been really annoying and I’m constantly asking for money, so thank you for sticking around. I’m trying to get back into the old swing of things and I’ve put in about a billion applications and I’m in University, can you believe that? You guys being patient even when I’m annoying has been really helpful. This is especially true of the folks in Lexi’s server who have to see me venting all the time. Y’all are darlings and I’m sorry I keep dragging my shit in there lmao I’ll try not to so much next year.

I’m especially thankful, though, I think, of the people who are still with me after so many years of knowing me. Like Ran and Ness and Zare and Comedy and even Em, even if we don’t talk. I mean, Em probably the most - she knew me when I was such a shithead that it’s kinda laughable now and yet she’s willing to be mutuals with me now. That’s pretty funny. (Hey, Em, guess who’s still trying to figure out how to write that TMNT thing and make it as interesting as the original idea was?) And of course I’ve known Comedy since elementary school but we didn’t really get close until high school and then I dropped off the face of the earth for like a year lol but she’s been a peach the whole time I’ve known her. And Ran’s been around for a while, we’ve known each other long enough that he probably still remembers when I went by Al. And Ness, who doesn’t have tumblr to my knowledge, well I’ve known her since diapers and she’s going to be the Maid of Honor at mine and Tobi’s wedding when we have the money to do a real ceremony - I would have filled that place at her wedding, too, if her sister-in-law wasn’t a needy bitch who had to have that position or she’d pitch a fit and ruin the entire wedding. And like, don’t even get me started on Zare, who was there when I was the worst shithead I’ve ever been and somehow still likes me even all these years later. I introduced myself to this man as Prussia, y’all. I introduced myself to him as a fallen kingdom because it was easier to pronounce than my legal name.

(It may have also been because I was into Hetalia and projected onto the character really hard because of all the “I’m awesome!” and thought it would help me be more confident, and also perhaps because my legal name being mispronounced led to a lot of people knowing me as a different fallen kingdom so it was a haha funny joak to me)

Also, this year, a certain vine-man turned youtube-man made a video that really, really spoke to me. Thomas introducing Remus and having an entire episode about intrusive thoughts and ‘bad’ creativity was - it meant a lot to me. Because since 2018, when I started writing Ego stuff, I haven’t... Well, I used to write a lot of dark stuff, y’all. I wrote violent shit because I wanted to and it was kinda just my Thing™. But after I started writing Ego stuff I started feeling like that was problematic, like it was a bad thing that I wanted to write nasty stuff like that. No one did anything to make me think that! It was just that, well, that kind of violence just... Seemed out of place. I’ve been in the process of writing a 146K+ word, 43 chapter fic containing ritualistic cannibalism, murder, unsafe sex, and various other nasty things since 2017 and I spent a terrifying amount of time feeling... Bad for that last year and this year. I’ve had to re-learn that it’s okay to write nasty stuff (no matter the moral issues other people take with it) because exploring not-so-great things in fic, especially to cope, is one of the many points of writing fic. And I’ll be honest, my dumpster fire fic was something I was writing to get through my associate’s degree because it was a new and terrifying experience and the prominent theme of running away was a feeling I was dealing with in tandem at the time. Remus’ introduction reminded me that dealing with intrusive thoughts and exploring the ‘bad’ creativity doesn’t make me a bad person, it just means I have nasty ideas and even the best people can have those. At least I can turn them into something I’m proud of writing.

So, going forward, I’m not going to shy away from writing my nasty stuff, and in 2020 I’m going to try and finish Trial and Error. I haven’t updated it since August, 2018, guys, it needs a new chapter.

And on that note, I don’t usually make New Years’ Resolutions. I never saw the point in the past and it wasn’t something super encouraged by anyone around me, so it never seemed important. But I’m making a resolution this year.

Over the years and years of writing, I’ve encountered something I think every writer encounters - I stopped writing. Now, I’m not saying I don’t write. Obviously I do, and have been, for a long time. I’m saying I don’t write like I used to. In 2013/2014 I wrote a 36-chapter Sly Cooper fic featuring an OC that still gets hits to this day, and I wrote it over the course of three months. I started it in November 2013 and it was done and put aside by the third of January 2014. It’s still one of my favorites! But the chapters are short, the storyline needs work, I didn’t spellcheck anything or even remotely try to keep my timeline completely straight. It was the first multi-chapter story exceeding 10 chapters that I ever finished. I wrote a chapter a day, as long as I was capable of doing so, I posted it, and I never looked back. It’s not a great story, but it’s one of my favorites. I loved it then and I love it now. And that’s something I don’t do anymore! When a fic doesn’t live up to my expectations, I don’t love it like I love that old fic, which did not at all live up to my expectations. My perfectionism has developed over the years and it has killed my creativity. I can still make cool stuff, can still make things I like, but it’s not the same anymore.

So my resolution is, in 2020, I’m going to write.

I’m going to write like I used to, but I’m going to put all of my experience into it.

I started writing in 2008 or 2009, maybe even before that - if I can recapture the love I had for it then, then I will be in great shape. I didn’t spellcheck back then and frankly I kinda sucked at writing even in 2013/2014, but if I can love writing like I did then and put all of what I’ve learned into it? Holy shit. I mean, I’ve been rewriting that old Sly Cooper fic for the past couple weeks, so it’s not exactly a mystery how much better things will turn out if I pour my much better spelling and grammar, my better ideas, my better commitment, into my fics going forward. All I need to make them great is to love doing it.

So in 2020, I’m going to write.

2019 has been a wild ride, and I’ve written less than half of what I wrote in 2018, not even counting all of my Ego requests for either year. I’ve spent the last three days in a mad dash to reach 100K written this year on AO3 by writing 30K before midnight tonight. I have 5K left! But even breaching 100K I won’t be halfway there. In 2018 I wrote 225.6K on AO3, not counting Ego stuff. And I think that’s because I haven’t loved doing it like I used to - the fact that I’ve loved the fic I started in order to make my “30K by tonight” goal and I haven’t let myself have enough time to agonize over whether it’s “good” or not has a lot of effect on how much I’ve written. My wordcount per hour has, like, doubled because I actually wanted to work. So I’ll reach my goal by tonight and still have time to celebrate at midnight.

So, again, thank you to everyone who’s stuck with me through this crazy year. Things haven’t been great, I’ll be honest, but I’m hoping next year will be better. They’re already off to a good start - my dad and I have a plan for him to start paying me back for how much money we spent moving here, and if I can get a job it’ll only get easier and it’ll only get better. And on top of that me and Tobi have plans to legalize our Marriage™ in September. It won’t be anything big - we’re waiting to have a real ceremony until we have the money to make sure Zare and Ness and Ran can come. But if all goes well, on 9/20/20 we’ll have the legal shit sorted out and Tobi will officially be my husband so that’s just another thing to be looking forward to.

Happy New Year, y’all! Hope you all have a good one. I speak a good 2020 into existence and I won’t stop until I get it.

[teacherkmd]

How to get a Work (Z) Visa for China (if you’re a North Carolinian)

Okay so if you’ve been following along, you know I’ve been working on getting my visa since about April.

It was a real struggle with lots of road blocks and setbacks. So, I’ve decided to outline the process and linking all the documents I needed to get the work (Z) visa for China.

Now keep in mind, each state has different requirements and the documents I link will only work for residents of North Carolina. Some of the steps will be the same for everyone applying for a visa through the DC embassy. If you apply for your visa at a different consulate you may have different steps involved. I’ll try and highlight where I know the steps are different, but as I’m not a professional at this and my knowledge is only based on my experience, please don’t get mad if the process is different for you. I’ll also link to the websites that helped me figure out everything I needed.

This process takes about 4 months, so plan accordingly. It is also expensive, so be prepared. I used mychinavisa.com for my courier service, but feel free to research others and see if you can find a better price.

First Steps

Get hired in China for a position that tells you to apply for a Z visa.

Make sure your passport has at least 6 months past the day your contract would end before it expires. If not, renew your passport. Also, make sure you have blank visa pages.

You will need recent (taken in the last 6 months) 33mm x 48mm size photos of you, no glasses, no hair in face, no smiling, white background, and no jewelry. Get passport sized photos taken at your post office, Walgreens, rite aid, etc. Trim them down to the required size (if you use a courier service they’ll most likely trim them for you).

You will need three documents to confirm your eligibility to work in China. These are: a foreigner health exam, your diploma, and a background check. 

For the background check, check with your contact at your job and make sure a State Background check is okay. For me it was. (NC Residents) Fill out this form called a Right to Review: and take it to the State Bureau of Investigations in Raleigh to get your finger prints done. Then you must mail the fingerprint card, a certified check or money order with the fee ($14), and the form. You can’t just drop these off even though it is the same office. Wait for your background check to come in the mail.

For your health exam, you will need this form. Take it to your doctor and have them fill it out. You will need blood work done make sure you get them all (two vials of blood taken, sorry guys). For things not normally covered by a yearly physical (like the chest x-ray/ECC), just write NA. For the “seal” or “stamp” just ask the doctors office to use the stamp they use for mail or something that looks legit, just tell them China likes stamps. You will need to add one of those photos to this form. 

Notarization

Okay, so now you have these three documents. You now need them to be notarized.

If you got a state criminal background check as suggested above, congratulations it is already notarized. Check that off the list. 

Alright. So in North Carolina, you need to get a COPY of your diploma notarized. For the love of all things holy, please do not send China your real diploma. 

Make a high quality photocopy of your diploma.

Print out a true copy form. DO NOT FILL IT OUT YET.

Take the form and the photocopy to a notary. Fill out the form and sign it in the presence of the notary.  

Notary does their thing. Pay them.

Staple this document to the front of your diploma copy.

For your completed health form. 

Print out an affidavit form. DO NOT FILL IT OUT YET.

take the affidavit form and the health form to a notary. Put the county you’re in, your full name, and in the 1. space write “ Physical Examination Record for Foreigner”. Draw a line from the edge of the page to cross out the 2. space, continue this line to the other side of the page. (This way nothing else can be added to this line). Sign your name.

Notary does their thing. Pay them.

Staple this document to the front of the health form.

North Carolina Secretary of State Authentications

Now you need to get your notarized documents authenticated by the NC Secretary of State. 

Fill out the cover letter form and print it. 

Acquire a prepaid envelope for return.

Decide how you’re going to pay.

I took mine in person to the Secretary of State in Raleigh. Take the cover letter, the three documents, and your return envelope, pay at the desk. OR Mail all these items to the Secretary of State in Raleigh. 

Your documents will come back to you with the authentication attached to the forms. DO NOT dismantle or detach in anyway or they’re no longer valid.

US Secretary of State Authentications

Ok, so because we live in NC we get an extra step here. Our documents have to be further authenticated. (If you’re not from NC but your consulate is DC for applying to the visa, you will have to do this step too.)

Fill out this form accordingly and print. 

Write a check for the fees ($8 per document)

Get a prepaid return envelope (not Fedex)

Mail these the envelope, check, forms, and previously notarized and nc authenticated documents.

your documents will come back to you with another authentication document attached to the front. DO NOT dismantle, detach in anyway or they’re no longer valid.

Chinese Embassy Legalization 

The Chinese embassy does not allow mail-in orders for document legalization. You will either need to go in person or use a courier service. I used mychinavisa.com

fill out this form in all caps and single sided

make a photo copy of your passport information/photo page

fill out this order form for mychinavisa.com 

follow the instructions on the order form and choose how you will pay and how you want your documents returned to you. I paid the 29$ return shipping fee and then it is $99 for first document and $59 for second and $59 for third. 

mail the three documents, the photo copy of your passport, and the order form to the correct office indicated on the order form. 

the documents will come back with a blue sticker in Chinese attached to the back of the US Secretary of state authentications page. 

Work permit

Alright, now you need the work permit. Scan all these documents and send them to your contact in China along with any other information they need. They will apply for a work permit for you. Make sure you do not detach any of the pages while you’re scanning the documents. Don’t worry if its awkward or not perfect. The way the pages are attached is annoying as hell. You’ll bring these documents with you to China. My university also needed a recommendation letter, a photo, location of where I was born, my birthdate and a few other things. 

When you get your work permit, make sure everything is filled out and no blanks are empty.

Applying for Z Visa

Okay you did it we got this far. Time to apply for the visa. 

You need:

Your passport

 a photocopy of your passport

those photos i mentioned way earlier

a filled out visa application (you’re applying for a single entry 30 visa, most likely. The dates on the work permit will help you choose the right one, and when in doubt ask your contact in China) (again all caps and single sided)

and the work permits (english/chinese version) that you received from your hiring institution. 

Again you can go to DC and do this your self in person, or use a courier service. I used mychinavisa.com again. Fill out their order form and follow their instructions for payment and mailing. 

If you aren’t from NC, and you’re following along and adapting this check list and your consulate is Chicago, you’re going to have to apply for the visa in person because they require fingerprinting. 

Well hopefully by the end of this list you have a visa, or it has helped orient you to getting a visa. Again, this is for Z visas for work in China. Written for residents of NC because the process was super confusing. Many of the steps might be the same for other states but with the forms being for your state. Just google the secretary of state in state to look for the forms you need. 

I’m sorry if this process has changed. This is up to date as of August 2018. 

Good luck.

[theworldoffostering]

Weekend

My heart is bursting as we just spent the weekend with Ms. 6 with plans for her to return during Thanksgiving week. She did really well, and it was seriously thrilling to see the kids get along as well as they did. I had a somewhat stern talk with she and DS that they had the ability to be the best of friends and have a positive influence on one another, or the opposite. We are praying it is the former. This weekend they raked leaves together in the cold, and encouraged each other to work hard. They played a quiet game together yesterday afternoon while E napped and I met with a school principal (yes, on a Saturday). They played cards last night while DH and I were putting the three youngest kids to bed. I know not every moment can be like that, but it was SO good for my heart to see what it could be like. It gave me so much hope! As I sat through church last night, I prayed several prayers of Thanksgiving.

We also took all six kids to get professional Christmas photos taken yesterday. It was surreal to be with the photographer and think that this is our complete family being photographed for the first time. It was two Christmases ago that I first figured out that Ms. 6 was no longer with her adoptive family (because I saw a Christmas photo of their family online without her in it). I started searching for her that day. Within 3-4 months we were finally told where she was and started the process of reconnecting with her. We are talking about a December discharge date for her. I'm guessing the date will be solidified sometime in the next 1-2 weeks.

We are still scared and uncertain, but things are coming together. I think that we have decided on a school for her--a smallish Catholic school. I met with that principal yesterday and toured it weeks ago. Some follow up conversations will be needed, but we have the application packet. We have to work out funding as the state can't legally pay for private school, but since she is starting mid-year, the tuition is pro-rated. We are not Catholic, we fall into the evengelical camp with spiritual beliefs, but the evangelical school was double the cost and a town over. I don’t think I can make it work. We’re also new to private school so there will be a steep learning curve for everyone. One of the other Catholic schools basically sent me a follow up email after the tour and said they didn’t think they would be a good fit for her (because they’re scared of her background). They think she should do public school with a one-on-one aide (which there is no chance she would qualify for). It’s so interesting how people react. “Oh, you’re doing such a good thing! We just want to have nothing to do with it.” I’ll try not to be bitter.

It's also becoming fairly apparent that we are going to need to make the switch to a 12 passenger van. Our Odyssey technically seats eight, but not in a way that works for any sort of drive over five minutes. There's a used 12 passenger van at the dealership one mile from our home that DH has test driven. We are thinking about selling our 2007 Odyssey and pursuing purchasing that. It has over 80,000 miles on it, but it's a diesel engine so the salesman said it still has quite a bit of life left in it.

We got the boys bunk beds, and have been trying to hire a contractor to come over and do an expansion both upstairs in one of the bedrooms, and do some work on our front steps. So far we've struck out in that contractors are in high demand right now. We can't even get people to return our phone calls.

I had a 504 meeting and conferences for DS this last week. It went really well! The school psychologist said he’s a "role model" for other students! What the what?! She was specifically speaking to the social skills group she has him in, but still. His teacher said he is growing leaps and bounds and has friends at school (such a relief for me to hear). He is certainly still struggling with his language at school, but making progress.

We started him back on his ADHD medication on Thursday of last week. He's now on that and his anti-anxiety medication. This weekend, he did really well! I am enjoying spending time with him again and feel so much joy at seeing his progress. There are definitely still challenges, but it is a far cry from where we were last November. I am incredibly grateful!

Work for me is work. The insurance changes and pay decrease will happen in January. It coincides with our needs increasing with adding a child, but the sermon last night at church was on finances. I tend to feel a bit more stressed about money and DH has a completely lackadaisical attitude about it. It shows how different our backrounds were coming into our marriage (single mom vs. ministry). It was good for me to hear the sermon, and will give DH and I some talking points in the next weeks. I'm still actively looking for other employment options, and will continue to do so. Send jobs my way Fumblrs. I’m wondering what kind of consulting work I could do with 15 years of training/teaching experience and 12 years of foster care experience.

I sometimes hesitate to post the good because I think I'm fearful that it will go away. I want this placement to work out with Ms. 6, but then feel like I can't hold onto it too tightly because I don't want to feel the responsibility of it if we fail. I'm realizing that I have to take the good with the bad at this point. I want to embrace the good wholeheartedly and joyfully even if it means feeling the bad more acutely. God's got us!

[itsfinancethings]

As millions of Americans saw their jobs disappear over the past few months, in some cases forever, there was one consolation. They were being taken care of by an impromptu safety net, created by Congress in the early days of the pandemic, that paid an extra $600 a week in unemployment benefits on top of the often-meager weekly benefits they would normally have received.

But absent federal action, that program expires July 31, and many Americans’ desperate situations are about to become bleaker. In Arkansas, people could go from receiving $681 a week to $81 a week; in Florida and Tennessee, even the highest-paying worker will receive a maximum of $275 a week in unemployment benefits, down from the $875 they received before, if Congress does not pass an extension of Federal Pandemic Unemployment Compensation (FPUC), the enhanced employment benefits that were originally part of the CARES Act. Even if lawmakers approve an extension, it will be only a temporary reprieve for the jobless, who face possibly months or years of limbo as the pandemic continues to wreak havoc on the country and the economy.

Megan K. Rocks, a 38-year-old single mother in Athens, Georgia, is about to see her weekly income go from $725 a week to $125. The events company where Rocks worked as a graphic designer had to cancel all of its events for the year, and Rocks’s income dried up in mid-March. The extra $600 has helped her cover her rent, car insurance and other bills, and pay her cellphone. It has meant that she can take care of her 11-year-old son in the absence of childcare instead of having to find another job immediately.

The looming expiration of these benefits has left Rocks with few options. She’s been looking for jobs she can do at home while she watches her son but hasn’t found any and is terrified about what may happen in a few weeks. “At this point, I have no idea what I’m going to do,” she says. $125 a week isn’t enough to cover her $650 rent, much less take care of things like car registration fees and school supplies for her son.

Millions of people losing their safety net at the same time will deal a major blow to an already shaky economy. Around 25 million Americans will continue to be unemployed in July, August, and September of 2020, according to estimates from the Congressional Budget Office. Until now, the extra unemployment benefits essentially helped bring these Americans earnings’ up to the average U.S. weekly wage, so millions could still buy food, pay rent, and maybe even spend on extras like school supplies or entertainment. That consumer spending helped support as many as 2.8 million jobs, reducing the unemployment rate by as much as 1.8%, according to the Joint Economic Committee. On Thursday, the U.S. Census Bureau said that retail sales were up 7.5% in June from the previous month, which many economists attribute to the generosity of unemployment benefits.

Keep up to date with our daily coronavirus newsletter by clicking here.

Much of the spending happening in the economy right now can be attributed to lower-income individuals, who are more likely to immediately buy food and other essentials with the money they receive, according to Harvard researchers; they recently found that people at the bottom of the income ladder are spending nearly as much as they did before the pandemic, while high income households have dramatically curtailed spending.

Without the additional unemployment benefits, low-earner expenditures will plummet, costing the economy jobs and growth. GDP will fall by about 2.5% for the second half of the year—more than a year’s worth of economic growth, according to Congressional testimony from Jason Furman, a Harvard economist.

The human toll will be dramatic. A moratorium on evictions from rental properties that have federally backed mortgages, or that take part in federal assistance programs, expires July 25. It covered slightly more than one in four rental units in the U.S. Families are poised to lose their homes; those who were able to pay credit card debt and student loans will begin to fall behind.

Already, the effect of state and local eviction moratoriums being lifted is becoming clear. Evictions resumed June 1 in Arizona, and courts are processing 52 cases a day on average, up from the 10 to 30 a day they processed during normal times. After Wisconsin’s eviction moratorium ended, evictions shot up 17% in Milwaukee. Michigan’s eviction ban ended July 15, and the state estimates that more than 75,000 eviction cases will now be filed.

Megan K. Rocks and her son Liam at the zoo. Photo courtesy of Megan K. Rocks

Annette Alcala, 30, quickly fell behind on her bills after the restaurant where she worked in New York City’s Time Square closed in March. She says the state took three months to process her unemployment claim, during which time she struggled to pay her share of the $2,150 monthly rent on the apartment she shares with a roommate. When her benefits finally began, they included back pay she was owed, but by then, Alcala was behind on the bills. She has yet to regain her financial footing; she’s still three months behind on rent and is staring down the end of the extra $600 a week. When it ends, she’ll receive $300 a week, barely enough to cover rent, much less her student loans or credit card debt. The government says it wants her to find a new job, “but there aren’t jobs available,” she says.

The end of the extra unemployment benefits will fall hardest on people of color like Alcala, who is Latina, further widening America’s wealth gap. In June the unemployment rate for Black Americans was 15.4%, and the unemployment for Hispanics was 14.5%, compared to 10.1% for white Americans, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics. Many of the service-sector jobs affected by the pandemic, including in restaurants, hotels, and retail stores, were held by Black Americans and Latinos. As states slow reopening plans and companies keep workers remote, demand for these jobs will remain low.

Legal advocates worry that the end of the $600 benefits will thrust families into a cycle of poverty that will be difficult to escape. Families may feel they have no choice but to take out high interest loans, which become increasingly difficult to pay back the longer that borrowers have no income. On July 7, the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau rescinded Obama-era provisions aimed at limiting payday and high-cost loans. Already, many people are struggling because of long delays processing unemployment benefits; Jocelyn J. Armand, advocacy director of Legal Services of Miami, says that only about 2% of her clients are receiving the unemployment benefits that they’re due. Out of Nevada’s 300,000 applications for unemployment benefits, only 100,000 have been paid, says Rhea Gertken, the directing attorney of Nevada Legal Services.

“Even during the best of times, people have a hard time making ends meet,” says Kevin De Liban, an attorney at Legal Aid Arkansas, which is dealing with an upswell of clients concerned about meeting their bills after July 31. “You take that steady job away and you take away temp supports, and they’re not going to be able to pay rent, pay utilities, or buy stuff needed to educate kids, and the usual inequities that already exist for low-income folks are going to intensify.”

While the HEROES Act, passed by the U.S. House of Representatives in May, would have extended the enhanced unemployment benefits until the end of the year, Republicans have raised objections. They point to research showing that two-thirds of recipients are making more on unemployment than they did while they were working and say that unemployed workers will fail to return to work if benefits remain generous. (A June study found no evidence that higher unemployment benefits were preventing people from returning to work.)

Trump economic adviser Larry Kudlow has expressed interest in a “return-to-work” bonus of $450 a week to incentivize people to find jobs, rather than an extension of unemployment benefits. Other proposals include gradually tapering the amount of extra unemployment benefits available, reducing the amount to $200 a week and sending another round of stimulus checks, or letting states cap the extra benefits to ensure they don’t exceed workers’ past wages. One thing is for sure: Republicans are unlikely to keep the $600 per week in extra benefits as its current level; Stephen Moore, a Trump economic adviser, told Yahoo that “the single most important thing we have to do going forward is stop the $600 a week.”

The surge of coronavirus infections may help Democrats win the argument that Congress must extend benefits, since so many states have had to scale back reopening plans. Though Labor Secretary Eugene Scalia told Senate Finance Committee in June that it was too early to extend benefits because “we’re seeing that things have the capacity to change quickly for the better,” it would be difficult to make that argument now. The U.S. reported a record 67,417 new COVID-19 cases on Tuesday.

Because of the way states process benefits, the last round of additional unemployment benefits will go out the week of July 25. States are already starting to program FPUC out of their computer systems, says Michele Evermore, a senior policy analyst at the National Employment Law Project. Unless Congress acts in the next few days, there will almost certainly be a gap when people do not receive additional benefits, even if they are renewed.“There will be individual catastrophes—people’s lives will be ruined,” she says.

Joe Raedle—Getty Images A car participates in a July 16, 2020 caravan protest headed for the Coral Gables, Florida, office of Sen. Rick Scott. Caravan participants asked Scott and other Senators to support extension of unemployment benefits for laid-off Americans.

The sudden disappearance in benefits highlights the lackluster state of unemployment insurance in the country, where payouts vary drastically from state to state. In the wake of the Great Recession, many states reduced the amount of unemployment benefits available and changed how they calculated payouts, to save themselves money. “States can be as stingy as they want,” Evermore says.

Unemployed workers can receive as little as $37 a week in unemployment compensation in Indiana, and $15 a week in North Carolina, according to Department of Labor data from 2019. Americans’ ability to survive may soon be dependent on the generosity of their states; in places like Florida and Tennessee, even people who had been making top salaries are only entitled to a maximum of $275 a week, while the same person cwould get $823 a week in unemployment benefits in Massachusetts. Ironically, some of the states hardest hit by the pandemic like Florida and Nevada, which both saw tourism dry up, will see some of the biggest drop-offs in money coming in once the FPUC expires, since their state-level benefits are so low.

For many unemployed workers, the looming expiration of extra benefits is causing a reckoning; they hoped the economy would go back to normal, but now, they need a new plan. With an unemployment rate of 11.1%, they have few choices and are competing with other unemployed workers for any open job. “My hands are tied–I am scrambling to find freelance work, but everything is slow to come back,” says John Jennings, a 35-year-old bartender in Minneapolis who has worked in restaurants, film and TV production, and special events, but has yet to find a job work in any of those fields. “Places keep downsizing, which makes me wonder, what does bartending even look like after this?”

Like Jennings, many people are seeking jobs in multiple fields and chafe at the idea that they haven’t been looking for work because unemployment benefits are so generous. Sam Nelsen, a single father living in the Orlando area, had two jobs before the pandemic, as a bartender at an Italian restaurant near Disney World and as a theme park concierge and tour guide Since work dried up in March, he has applied for jobs in construction and in hospitality. But even though Disney World has partially opened, it needs fewer workers because it is keeping patrons and employees socially-distanced; just 20,000 of its 43,000 workers have been called back.

Nelsen’s rent is $1600 a month, and he doesn’t know how he will pay it or feed his kids on the $275 a week he’ll be receiving if the additional unemployment benefits expire. The extra benefits “are literally vital to survival,” he told me. “It’s tough to even think about what happens once July ends. We’re living in the center of the hospitality world, and we are not being taken care of.”

[123greetingsimages]

How to Get Help With Paying Rent

Reach out to nonprofits Mandy and her spouse had only discovered their footing after moving across the country. Then an unexpected expense took a massive bite out of the funding and left them needing emergency rent payment eviction prevention program and eviction assistance programs.

"My car failed inspection, and also to pass I had a $1,000 repair," Mandy recalls. "I had 10 days to get it fixed and our lease was due next week."

Mandy and her spouse were already barely becoming. They had low-paying jobs. Mandy's paycheck was dependent on the number of shifts she could pick up in the supermarket where she worked. It was either pay their $850 rent, or fix her car.

Reluctantly, Mandy reached out to her mother for help and say i need help paying my rent before i get evicted. .

"We did not know what else to do," Mandy says. "If I couldn't drive my car, I could not get to work"

Mandy's struggle is not unique. Many people are only 1 emergency cost away from being unable to cover their basic bills. In fact, a recent analysis by the United Way Alice Project found that a whopping 43 percent of US households can not pay their yearly expenses (such as housing, meals, transportation, child care, health care and a yearly smartphone bill). The biggest of these expenses is usually lease.

Why people want help with rent

In accordance with federal housing guidelines, any family that places more than 30% of their income toward rent are"cost burdened." This means they might have trouble affording different necessities and looking for i need help paying my rent before i get evicted. .

"That's hard in a great deal of rental niches for individuals," states Laura Scherler, senior manager of economic freedom and corporate services in United Way. She added that there are individuals who spend upwards of 40 or 50% of their income on rent. "It leaves them exposed when their car breaks down, or their children get sick. Anything unexpected will throw off them. It doesn't give them any wiggle room to handle those disasters."

This was true for Mandy. She and her partner had already exhausted their savings because of their movement when they had to get her car fixed. Mandy estimates which they had been paying close to 50% of the mutual income toward rent because i need help paying my rent before i get evicted.

"We didn't have any savings to fall back ," Mandy says, adding saving even $20 per paycheck (since Scherler recommends) was incredibly tricky for the couple at the moment.

Only 39% of Americans can cover a 1,000 financial emergency out of their savings, as demonstrated by a recent poll from Bankrate.

The Exact Same Bankrate survey found that of people who Can't cover a $1,000 fiscal crisis out of economies, their answer would be to:

Finance using a credit card (19%)

Reduce their spending on other things (13%)

Borrow money from family or friends (12 percent )

Take out a private loan (5%)

There are many reasons that someone could be needing short-term assistance and would wish to learn how to get help with rent and i need help paying my rent before i get evicted. Volunteers of America (VOA) is a nationwide nonprofit organization which helps people find affordable housing, particularly veterans, senior citizens, families and people with disabilities. VOA has recognized these reasons for the increase in requirement for these solutions:

Wages are not rising at a proportional rate to the consistently increasing property values and very low vacancy rates. Property values and rent continue to grow at a rate that renters can not continue with, leading to fights with paying rent because i need help paying my rent before i get evicted. Recently long waiting lists for subsidized housing. Waitlists of 2-3 years for low-income families and singles earn paying lease in greater rental units more difficult. While the issue might be on the increase, there are ways to increase money for rent.

The best way to get help paying rent

If you are having trouble paying your rent, here is a listing of a few different methods to find financial assistance.

Read your lease

Find out your rights as a renter. Look to see what happens if your payment is late or if you skip a month, when eviction proceedings would begin.

Usually, it takes 90 days before eviction proceedings start, Scherler states, therefore there is some opportunity to work with.

"If you miss one rent payment, buti need help paying my rent before i get evicted ," Scherler says.

Talk with Your landlord

Landlords can sometimes be forgiving if you fall on temporary hard times. If you're a fantastic tenant and have a fantastic relationship with your landlord, they may be willing to work with you. Ask if they'll accept a late payment or in the event that you may pay your rent .

Reach out to nonprofits

Luckily, there are a few programs which have the mission of assisting with rental help. Nonprofit organizations can fulfill the demand for help once the authorities cannot. The two Catholic Charities and The Salvation Army may have the ability to provide emergency funds to cover your rent and utility invoices. Contact your local Salvation Army or Catholic Charities to find out if you're eligible for housing assistance.

Another option is calling 2-1-1, a 24-hour helpline handled by United Way that joins people in need of help to resources in their communities.

Of the 15 million calls and emails asking 2-1-1 for assistance in 2017, 4.4 million were for housing and utility help. That call volume was the highest percentage of any category, Scherler says.

"I believe, regrettably, housing is a tough one," Scherler states. "That really is a significant challenge in a great deal of communities."

Another national nonprofit organization that provides assistance is Modest Needs, which provides grants for a one-time emergency expense.

If approved, the nonprofit posts the grant petition on its public website and allows visitors to review and support the grant requests that matter most to them. After the organization funding a grant petition, they remit payment directly to the vendor shown in the candidate's documentation. Most requests become met within a couple of weeks, Taylor says, and lots of the grant programs have to do with covering living expenses which applicants can't manage because of a short-term fiscal crisis.

Look into other sources of earnings

Request your friends and family for a loan or see if it is possible to find a payroll advance from the employer. Some businesses may also have a hardship fund for workers.

Consider crowdfunding

Crowdfunding is a superb solution. A good way to alert family and friends to your situation is by beginning a design on GoFundMe. They supply free fundraising so you get to keep more of their money you raise. You might be surprised how inviting your friends and family are in assisting you to get back on your feet.

Rental Aid for veterans

If you're a veteran, then the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs provides help for homeless veterans. Nonprofit organizations such as Veterans Inc. might also be able to help those who need help with rent through its housing program like i need help paying my rent before i get evicted . If you are disabled, the federal government has a help program to offer financing to develop and subsidize low income rental housing for adults with disabilities.

Government aid

Unfortunately, the national government provides only limited assistance to cover emergency rent costs.

It's generally administered through the state agencies, however unless you're facing flooding, the help is hard to get.

"You practically have to get to the stage of catastrophe before you're ready to find assistance," Scherler says.

Therefore, if you're struggling and will need to raise money for rent, have a deep breath. Contact your spouse, a nonprofit company, your family and friends, or start a crowdfunding fundraiser. Most importantly, do not forget that you aren't alone. Occasionally most of us need a bit of assistance.

[heatherdemetrios-blog]

The Space Between Breaths: Transitions in the Artistic Life

For the past year, I’ve been going through a transition, floating in a space between. It’s been three years since my first book came out. There was the before publication life, when I’d yet to sell a book and was dreaming hard. Then there was the after, where I struggled to learn the ropes of being a published author, yet still managed to write and sell one to two books a year, hustling like a mother. During that time there were aborted projects and disappointments, but I focused laser-like attention on my work and career, with little time for much else. Sometimes that paid off, and sometimes it didn’t. One thing it resulted in was a near-breakdown, spiritual and creative depletion, and an increasing existential dread that followed me around to the point where I felt like Edward Snowden, always looking over my shoulder. 

This was unsustainable. A life of waiting for the other shoe to drop is not a good life. And a writer who doesn’t write, or who writes but finds no joy in it, does not a happy writer make.  It also, incidentally, makes it hard to sell more books. The nervy you feel about a project somehow winds itself through the text, an X factor that makes or breaks a book. My books were breaking. I was breaking. So began my year of transition, which began in July 2016, an awakening of sorts that’s still very much in progress. This wasn’t intentional, not something I planned as a great experiment. It just sort of happened. Out of necessity and desperation and a nameless need. 

This year of transition actually started in Spring 2016, though I had no idea that this was what was happening. I started devouring books like I used to, back when I wasn’t writing three of them at a time. I literally bought and read every single JoJo Moyes book I could find (okay, I’ve saved a couple because it’s too depressing, a life without a JoJo book to look forward to), after discovering Me Before You on a Barnes and Noble table. I was working—I had revisions and copyedits and submissions. But when I sent in the last thing that was due, in mid-June, I unwittingly gave myself a for-real break. It was on accident—I didn’t realize I was taking a break until the month of July passed with me having written only a handful of words, most of them non-fiction. I got ideas, I threw ideas away—I briefly considered learning Russia and moving to Moscow. The bulk of my writing was for a residency application I never sent in, as well as the occasional blog post or lengthy email. I began meditating, reconnected with my spiritual side, read lots of books, treated myself to copies of Vogue, discovered the delights of the French 75 cocktail, and took a poetry class. I basked in sunshine and visited with friends and family. There were still stressful writerly moments: two rewrites gone bad, dismal royalty statements. But for the first time in years, writing was not the most important thing. The most important thing was me. It was as though my soul had given me one of those piercing looks and said, My dear, you are the canvas. 

Eureka. 

I followed my curiosity, each urge a trail of will-o’-the-wisps that led me deeper into my inner landscape, with its turbulent sea, floating glaciers, and craggy mountains set against endless dunes (yes, somehow my innards resemble Morocco, Ireland, and Iceland). In Big Magic, Elizabeth Gilbert says: I believe that curiosity is the secret. Curiosity is the truth and the way of creative living. She’s absolutely right. I found such joy poking around in New Age stores and going down the Wiki hole of Romanov research and planning a trip to Prague. I delighted in the plethora of self-help books I kept hearing about, got into essential oils, and finally took a Pilates class. I bought strange rings and drank beer and even started liking kale. I got a Reiki treatment and bought my first deck of Tarot cards and I campaigned for Hillary Clinton. I bought a Nasty Woman shirt and protested with thousands of women all over the world, reigniting that little Marxist-Anarchist activist that has been hiding inside me since the Bush years. I made a few big life decisions, some quite seismic, some still in progress. I grieved, felt confusion, wonder, awe, gratitude, love, solidarity, despair. I probably drank more wine after November 8th than in the rest of my life combined. I cooked my first steak. I began living according to these wise words from Elsie De Wolfe: I am going to make everything around me beautiful. That will be my life. Fresh flowers scattered about the house. Crystals lined up on windowsills. A skirt with red roses splashed across the fabric. I see the changes that all this adventuring has wrought everywhere: in my home, my body, my mind, my spirit. And yet, the writing will not budge. 

I am still trekking up a damnably high mountain, hoping to reach a summit and praying there’s a nice little valley on the other side of it, with cool spring water and long, fragrant grass I can lie in when I look at the stars. Alas, creativity is uncharted territory—ever ineffable, a tricksy landscape complete with quicksand, dark forests, and, well, you get the metaphor. I confess, there have been a few occasions in which I actually uttered the phrase, Why am I doing this? Or I don’t want to be a writer anymore. I’m not sure if I meant it or not. I suspect maybe I did. It sounds ever so wonderful to leave work at work, to have boundaries between oneself and what one does for a living, to not be in constant artistic torture. 

The election and its aftermath was a huge blow that I’m still recovering from. I don’t think I realized how much it affected my ability to be creative until quite recently, when I realized I have to rewrite a bogart of a book I’m working on for the third time. I cannot overstate how unlike me this is. I’ve never spent two years after selling a book trying to rewrite it. It’s madness. Maddening. But when I began to connect the dots, I could see that the bulk of the problem began in the beginning of 2016—a coincidence? I think not. As I said in an email to the book’s editor: I’m sorry for being the world’s shittiest writer. I blame Trump. 

I blamed my mental health and my infernal inability to understand how time works. I blamed New York City for being so goddamn expensive and loud and distracting and fabulous. I also blamed myself, for not taking my own good advice that I give to my clients and that I myself know works. I only give advice when I’ve learned something (usually the hard way), when I know that something is tried and true. As a creativity coach, I tell my clients that each book is a different beast, and that’s true. And also that writing is a marathon (not a race), that you will never be a master, that you will always be learning, and that you should trust the process: the not knowing, the frustration—these are just hazards of the job and an essential part of the process. But each time I find myself uncertain creatively, these lessons are hard to remember. A girl has to eat, you know. 

One thing my meditation teachers like to talk about is the space between breaths. In mindfulness meditation, you focus on the inhale and exhale, using it to anchor your mind in the present. Between each round of inhalation and exhalation, there is a pocket of pure being, where your body has a moment to bask in its existence, where nothing is required of it. It can’t last very long because your lungs need air, but for just a sliver of time, you are infinite. Free-floating. This is also a space for transition, much shorter than my year of transition, but equally powerful. You can discover things there, though it may take you years, or even a lifetime to figure out. You might even see what you’re made of. 

This is an essential part of the meditation process. These pockets of no-breath are not simply a bridge between breaths, links on the path to nirvana. They are teaching moments, rich in the kind of knowledge that lives deep in your bones. It’s the same with the transitions in an artist’s life. The space between projects, between ideas, between inspiration and creative wastelands—this is, paradoxically, where the good stuff lives. Transitions are opportunities to grow, to heal, and to change. They give you space (whether you want it to not) to reassess your work, your craft, your goals. These sometimes involve dark nights of the soul, real reckonings that bring who you are and why you do what you do into sharp focus. Sometimes you won’t like what you see. Transitions, from an artistic point of view, are absolutely necessary. Think about the period when Bowie fled to Berlin, intent on getting clean and reconnecting to his art. He called his cocaine years in Los Angeles, where he embodied the Thin White Duke persona, “the darkest days of my life.” Despite being a rock star, he was going broke and Berlin, at the time, was a cheap place to live while he was in recovery. In Europe, he began visiting galleries, working on self-care through literature and classical music education, and, of course, kicking his cocaine habit and exploring Berlin’s music scene. His roommate was Iggy Pop, and I like to imagine them sitting around late at night, trading notes and blowing each other’s minds. What resulted was the Berlin trilogy, a rich artistic period and a turning point in his life. 

Of course, not all transitions need to be so dramatic, and I’m still trying to figure out what this one means for me. When I look back, what will I call this year (or, God forbid, years)? Will I look on it fondly, or shudder, grateful that it’s over? I can’t imagine not being thankful for it. Already, I’m seeing my interests in what I want to write expand in unexpected ways. Adult fiction, young adult nonfiction, historical. I’m not quite sure where I’ll land. I’m getting ideas, but am wary of investing too much in anything. I think I’m still getting my sea legs. Meditation, exercise, and healthy eating habits are helping. As is travel and working with my clients, who inspire me every day. I’m taking lots of notes because I suspect that as much as I’m learning right now about what it means to be an artist in transition, I suspect there’s even more to glean from this time later, when I can see how all the dots connected. 

Being a creative doesn’t suit our modern world, not if you’re an Artist with a capital A. Because art needs quiet, time, space, privacy. All things that are hard to come by these days, especially in Brooklyn. I stopped using my private Facebook account, rarely leave the apartment, and turn a deaf ear to industry chatter. It’s been a long time since I finished a project. Everything I’m working on is in a different stage and often ends up being cast aside or totally reworked. So of course the age old question of how to make a living as an artist rears its ugly head. If you aren’t producing, you aren’t getting paid. So while artistic explorations sound great on paper, in reality, it’s the paper itself you start worrying about. 

It’s becoming increasingly hard for artists to make a living—just take a look at Trump’s budget proposal, with threatens to cut the NEA out of existence. It’s especially difficult for writers because of the plethora of content out there. Jesus, how many blogs and websites and articles can exist? With newspapers and magazines folding left and right, writers are forced to make some pretty tough choices. These concerns are ever present, and they will be for the foreseeable future. Of course, being an artist has always involved financial acrobatics. Chekhov paid the bills through a medical practice, and Tolstoy had to self-publish War and Peace. I’m in good company. I’ve very much begun to appreciate Elizabeth Gilbert’s words in Big Magic about how your job as an artist is to take care of your creativity, not the other way around. It’s been interesting, cobbling together an income that all leads back to writing, but isn’t necessarily writing. Teaching and coaching and editing allows me to talk about what I love—writing, the artistic process, and creative living—and to help my fellow writers on their own journeys. It also gives me the chance to take care of my writing, rather than requiring it to pay all the bills. I’m already seeing the seeds I’m planting blossoming. For the first time in a long time, I’m allowing myself to consider alternative ways of living and alternative approaches to my writing. Maybe I don’t publish a book every year. Maybe I don’t only write in YA. Maybe I play a whole lot more in my creative process. Maybe I take time to take care of myself. 

The journey continues, endless and exciting and horrible and wonderful, an adventure I’m honored to have. I take a breath, exhale, and rest in the transition, looking forward to whatever comes next.

[politicalemail]

re: 2020 from info@elizabethwarren.com

Warren for President Elizabeth just announced that she’s running for President! Become an Official Day One Donor and own a piece of this fight. DONATE NOW I just got off the stage in Lawrence, Massachusetts, where I made a big announcement:I’m running for President. Let me tell you why. It starts with a story about Lawrence. A little over 100 years ago, the textile mills in Lawrence employed tens of thousands of people, including immigrants from more than 50 countries. Business was booming. The guys at the top were doing great. But workers made so little money that families were forced to crowd together in dangerous tenements and live on beans and scraps of bread. Inside the mills, working conditions were horrible. Children were forced to operate dangerous equipment. Workers lost hands, arms, and legs in the gears of machines. One out of every three adult mill workers died by the time they were 25. But one day, textile workers in Lawrence – led by women – went on strike to demand fair wages, overtime pay, and the right to join a union. It was a hard fight. They didn’t have much. Not even a common language. But they stuck together. And they won. Those workers did more than improve their own lives. They changed America. Within weeks, more than a quarter of a million textile workers throughout New England got raises. Within months, Massachusetts became the first state in the nation to pass a minimum wage law. And today, there are no children working in factories. We have a national minimum wage. And worker safety laws. Workers get paid overtime, and we have a forty-hour work week.The story of Lawrence is a story about how real change happens in America. It’s a story about power – our power – when we fight together. Today, millions and millions of American families are also struggling to survive in a system that has been rigged by the wealthy and the well-connected. And just like the women of Lawrence, we are ready to say enough is enough.We are ready to take on a fight that will shape our lives, our children’s lives, and our grandchildren’s lives: The fight to build an America that works for everyone.I am in that fight all the way. And that’s why, today, I declared that I am a candidate for President of the United States of America. I can only build this campaign if you’re with me – chip in and be a part of our movement from Day One. The truth is, I’ve been in this fight for a long time. I grew up in Oklahoma, on the ragged edge of the middle class. When my daddy had a heart attack, my family nearly tumbled over the financial cliff. But we didn’t. My mother, who was 50 years old and had never worked outside the home, walked to Sears and got a minimum-wage job answering phones. That job saved our house, and saved our family. I ended up at a commuter college that cost $50 a semester. And that is how the daughter of a janitor managed to become a public school teacher, a law professor, a United States Senator, and now a candidate for President. I’ve spent most of my life studying what happens to families like mine. Families caught in the squeeze. Families that go broke. And what I found was that year after year, the path to economic security had gotten tougher and rockier for working families, and even tougher and even rockier for people of color. I also found that this wasn’t an accident. It wasn’t inevitable. No. Over the years, America’s middle class had been deliberately hollowed out. And families of color had been systematically discriminated against and denied their chance to build some security. The richest and most powerful people in America were rich, really rich – but they wanted to be even richer – regardless of who got hurt. So, every year, bit by bit, they lobbied Washington and paid off politicians to tilt the system just a little more in their direction. And year by year, bit by bit, more of the wealth and opportunity went to the people at the very top. That’s how, today, in the richest country in the history of the world, tens of millions of people are struggling just to get by. This disaster has touched every community in America. And for communities of color that have stared down structural racism for generations, the disaster has hit even harder. We can’t be blind to the fact that the rules in our country have been rigged against people for a long time – women, LGBTQ Americans, African Americans, Latinos, Native Americans, immigrants, people with disabilities – and we need to call it out. When government works only for the wealthy and well-connected, that is corruption – plain and simple. It’s time to fight back and change the rules.First: We need to end corruption in Washington. That’s why I’ve proposed the strongest and most comprehensive anti-corruption law since Watergate.Second: We need to put more economic power in the hands of the American people. Make it quick and easy to join a union. Make American companies accountable for their actions and raise wages by putting workers in those corporate boardrooms where the real decisions are made. Break up monopolies when they choke off competition. Take on Wall Street so that the big banks can never again threaten the security of our economy. And when giant corporations – and their leaders – cheat their customers, stomp out their competitors, or rob their workers, let’s prosecute them. Let’s make real investments in child care, college, Medicare for All, creating economic opportunity for families, housing, opioid treatment, and addressing rural neglect and the legacy of racial discrimination. Stop refusing to invest in our children. Stop stalling on spending money – real money – on infrastructure and clean energy and a Green New Deal. Start asking the people who have gained the most from our country to pay their fair share. That includes real tax reform in this country – reforms that close loopholes and giveaways to the people at the top, and an Ultra-Millionaire Tax to make sure rich people start doing their part for the country that helped make them rich.Third: We need to strengthen our democracy. That starts with a constitutional amendment to protect the right of every American citizen to vote and to have that vote counted. Let’s overturn every single voter suppression rule that racist politicians use to steal votes from people of color. Outlaw partisan gerrymandering – by Democrats and Republicans. And overturn Citizens United. Our democracy is not for sale. Real democracy also requires equal justice under law. It’s not equal justice when a kid with an ounce of pot can get thrown in jail while a bank executive who launders money for a drug cartel can get a bonus. It’s not equal justice when, for the exact same crimes, African Americans are more likely than whites to be arrested, charged, convicted, and sentenced. We need criminal justice reform and we need it now.To get all this done, we’ve got to fight side by side. We must not allow those with power to weaponize hatred and bigotry to divide us. More than 50 years ago, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. went to Montgomery and warned us about the danger of division. He talked about how bigotry and race-baiting are used to keep black Americans divided from white Americans so that rich Americans can keep picking all their pockets. That playbook has been around forever. Whether it’s white people against black people, straight people against gay people, middle-class families against new immigrant families – the story is the same. The rich and powerful use fear to divide us. We’re done with that. Bigotry has no place in the Oval Office. We come from different backgrounds, but our movement won’t be divided by our differences. It will be united by the values we share.We all want a country where everyone – not just the wealthy – can take care of their families. Where everyone – not just the ones who hire armies of lobbyists and lawyers – can participate in democracy. Where every child can dream big and reach for opportunity. And we’re all in the fight to build an America that works for everyone. This won’t be easy. A lot of people will tell us it isn’t even worth trying. But we will not give up. I’ve never let anyone tell me that anything is “too hard.” People said it would be “too hard” to build an agency that would stop big banks from cheating Americans on mortgages and credit cards. But we got organized, we fought back, we persisted, and now that consumer agency has forced these banks to refund nearly $12 billion directly to people they cheated. When Republicans tried to sabotage the agency, I came back to Massachusetts and then ran against one of them. No woman had ever won a Senate seat in Massachusetts, and people said it would be “too hard” for me to get elected. But we got organized, we fought back, we persisted, and now I am the senior Senator from the Commonwealth of Massachusetts. So, no, I am not afraid of a fight. Not even a hard fight. Sure, there will be plenty of doubters and cowards and armchair critics this time around. But we learned a long time ago that you don’t get what you don’t fight for. We are in this fight for our lives, for our children, for our planet, for our futures – and we will not turn back.So here is the promise I make to you today: I will fight my heart out so that every kid in America can have the same opportunity I had – a fighting chance to build something real. This is our moment in history to dream big, fight hard, and win. And here’s a big piece of how we’ll get it done: We’ll end the unwritten rule of politics that says anyone who wants to run for office has to start by sucking up to rich donors on Wall Street and powerful insiders in Washington.I’m not taking a dime of PAC money in this campaign or a single check from a federal lobbyist. I’m not taking applications from billionaires who want to run a Super PAC on my behalf. And I challenge every other candidate who asks for your vote in this primary to say exactly the same thing. We’re going to keep building this campaign at the grassroots. Right now, I’m on my way to an organizing event in New Hampshire, and in the next week, I’ll hit the road to Iowa, South Carolina, Georgia, Nevada, and California.Person to person, face to face – that’s how we’ll win. And that’s how we’ll put power back in the hands of the people. It’s a long way to Election Day. But our fight starts here. It starts with you, and its success is up to you. Donate $3 or more right now to make it happen. Thanks for being a part of this, Elizabeth It’s official: Elizabeth is running for President! Can she count on your support? Donate right now to help fight back against the powerful special interests. Become an Official Day One Donor and own a piece of this campaign. DONATE NOW Paid for by Warren for President All content © 2019 Warren for President, All Rights Reserved PO Box 171375, Boston, MA 02116 This email was sent to engagepoliticalemail@gmail.com We’ll miss you, but you can always unsubscribe.

[davidcdelreal]

10 Financial Choices You’ll Regret in 10 Years

“All I had to do was turn in the form to my HR department.” It was a simple task but one that was shoved to the side to deal with most important things throw at us.

The form was a 401k enrollment firm and I my client was left wondering what could have been had she enrolled when it first became available to her.

We've all faced similar decisions.

Some we get right.  Some we are left wondering the possibilities of what could and should have been.

Let's take a look at some financial decisions that you'd kick yourself for in 10 years.

Don't do them!

1. Starting your budget way too late

I’ll be first to admit that I hate budgeting. Nonetheless, my wife and I both recognize the importance of having a budget.

Most people view budgeting as not being able to spend money on the things that you want to but the reality is sitting down and making out a budget is a freeing exercise. It frees you because you can recognize the areas of your life of where you are wasting money on things that aren’t important to you.

An easy example could be spending money on a cell phone package when you might not need all of the minutes with the data that it provides. Could you put that extra money toward a vacation fund or help pay for your kid’s college education? Using that money for something that is more desirable instead of an expense that you could care less about will put your money to better use.

If you have been putting off beginning to budget, it's time to start. Forget that you should have started yesterday, start today and discover the amazing benefits of budgeting. Some of those benefits will extend to other areas of your life besides your finances . . . .

For example, you might find that having a budget improves your relationship with your partner. If you're married, you probably know how difficult money fights can be to overcome. You know what?

A budget helps reduce those money fights because you're making an agreement before you spend the money. No surprises, no fights.

2. Not paying off your credit cards each month

This was something that my father struggled with and I initially struggled with when I was graduating college. I was picking up credit cards left and right and kept telling myself that I could just make a payment later.

Well, for me, later became never and my credit card debt started piling on and suffocating me. I eventually figured it out only after paying hundreds of dollars of unnecessary interest.

Unfortunately, a lot of people don't take the time to figure out how much interest are paying. However, if they found out, they'd probably want to pay off their credit cards pretty quickly.

Make an effort to pay off your credit cards quickly. The beauty of doing this is that it will ensure you keep more money in your wallet instead of giving it over to some large credit card company.  If you cannot pay them off quickly then open up one of the 0 apr credit cards so you can get your interest down to zero and pay them off faster.

Some people can't control their credit card spending. If that's you, it's best to stay away from credit cards altogether. While you might be missing out on the rewards, you'll be better off.

3. Blindly buying a financial product without investigating first

It amazes me that with the ability to do a quick search online that many investors are still putting their money into investment products and they don’t understand how they work. I talked to dozens of investors who have invested a large chunk of their life savings into something that they couldn’t explain to a friend or neighbor.

Do your homework, get a second opinion, and make sure that you understand how this investment works. How much is it going to cost you? Are there any surrender charges? These are the types of answers that you need to know.

I know a woman who paid over $3,500 in variable annuity fees and didn't even know it. Don't think it can't happen to you.

If someone is selling you an investment or an insurance product, make sure that you do your homework before you invest your money.

4. Putting your emergency fund on the back burner

Emergency funds help protect you from the inevitable. The thing is, everyone has a big financial emergency at some point. That's why you need to prepare.

It's a fantastic idea to have many months worth of expenses in your fund. Some people have three months, others have 12. I think you should have eight months, but choose an amount that makes sense for your situation.

For example, if you're single and have one job, you will probably want more money in your emergency fund. If you're married and both you and your spouse are employed, you can probably get away with less money in your emergency fund.

There are a number of places to put your emergency fund money. Remember, you should only place your emergency fund money somewhere that you can retrieve it pretty quickly without much risk to your capital.

One such place is an online savings account. There are a number of great online savings accounts that deliver quite a bit more interest than you'd find at a physical bank or credit union.

Plus, there are usually no penalties associated with taking money out of a standard online savings account (if there are, look elsewhere).

That's just one idea of where you can keep your emergency fund money. I recommend that you read The 11 Best Short-Term Investments For Your Money at GoodFinancialCents.com to learn about some more places you can keep your emergency fund money. But don't just stop there – act on what you learn and get your emergency fund moving in the right direction!

Remember: If you let your emergency fund slip into the abyss, you might find yourself down the road with more debt than you can handle. Make sure to replenish it!

5. Buying a brand new car that you can't afford

Vehicles are important for many, but remember that they can quickly turn into a discretionary purchase. Don't buy all the bells and whistles when you can't afford them.

The ramifications of a car payment well exceed the financial hit of the price of the car, and you can end up spending your retirement away without realizing it.

Listen, I know what it's like to drive around an old car. I used to have a '98 Chevy Lumina Sedan that was something a grandmother would drive. Now, I probably could have purchased something fancier or sold the car before I did, but instead, I decided that not having a car payment was awesome. But I certainly didn't always think that way.

I remember my professor in a finance class pointing out that he would take a bunch of vacations whenever he wanted to because he didn't have a car payment. And you know what? He was right. That one little point from my finance professor made a difference in my life, and it taught me the value of owning stuff outright. You can learn this lesson too and see tremendous results.

And please, please don't tell me that you're thinking about buying a brand new car for your kid in college because they need “reliable transportation.”

There are plenty of reliable, used cars available for purchase that are much more affordable than brand new cars. And you know what the differences are between a car that's three to five years old and a brand new car? There aren't many in most cases. So why spend the extra money?

6. Trying to be a DIY investor when you have no clue what you're doing

If you're not a financial professional or haven't been exposed to financial education, you really shouldn't be investing unless you're doing so with the help of a financial advisor.

I think the biggest harm in this comes when an older couple is retired and the husband has been mostly in charge of the couple’s investments. All too often, the wife is clueless in what they’re actually invested into and if something unexpectedly happens to the husband, she doesn’t even know where to begin. Hire a financial advisor who can meet with the both of you. Then, the wife has someone to rely on in case something happens and is super important.

Financial advisors can also save you a great deal of time and money ensuring your investing strategy is relevant for your situation. Don't go without this valuable service.

7. Viewing important insurance polices as being lame

If you were to die right now, would your family be financially okay? If not, you need life insurance.

And, that's just one example. There are a number of important insurance policies you shouldn't delay in putting in place: disability insurance, perhaps long-term care insurance if you're over 60 years old, and perhaps umbrella insurance.

“I’ll get around to doing it.” Those were the tragic last words of a husband that left behind his wife and two kids. What he was going to getting around to doing was taking out a life insurance policy. In fact, he had begun the process and gone through his life insurance options, but never signed the application and never sent in a payment so the policy wasn’t active.

In any other situation that wouldn’t have been a big deal, but in this case, the husband took his motorcycle out for a weekend spin and was involved in a collision that left his spouse a widow. What could have been a financial relief (a life insurance policy) is now added stress and worry to a grieving widow (the absence of funds when the family needs it most). She also has to deal with the fact that she lost her husband and the father of her two kids.

Insurance protects you from financial liability you wouldn't be able to cover with your emergency fund alone. Don't neglect it.

8. Treating your retirement like a distant second cousin

One of the first meetings I had as a financial advisor was when I was meeting with a couple that was almost two and a half times my age. They were hoping to retire soon and they sought me out to be their retirement hope.

When I started poring through their financial documents, I quickly learned that retiring early wasn’t even close to being an option for them. In fact, retiring at all might not be a possibility. They put off saving and planning for retirement way too long.

They had little savings and no pension and the only thing they could really fall back on was Social Security. Note: their savings was roughly about $60,000. Don’t procrastinate any longer. Even if you get started investing only $100 a month, do it.

Saving for retirement is critical. If you're trusting Social Security to be your sole source of income, think again. It's not likely that you'll be able to maintain your lifestyle with Social Security benefits alone. If you would be able to, congratulations, you're living pretty frugally!

Invest today with a financial professional you trust.

9. Neglecting important money conversations with your spouse

Want to crash and burn financially?  Try taking on all of your financial goals without getting on the same page of your spouse.

Marriage means you do life together as one unit.  All decisions, especially money decisions, should be discussed and agreed up.

Why not align your financial goals? Talk through your differences, learn to compromise, and get on the same page together. It will be worth it – especially down the road.

10. Being blind to your recurring expenses

Recurring expenses can eat a hole in your wallet. And you know what? Many people don't even know that's happening to them.

Take a look at the recurring expenses – large and small – and determine which ones you absolutely need and which ones look more like discretionary splurges. It's okay to splurge every once in a while, but don't go overboard.

When you are working on your budget, many of these expenses might come to your mind. Don't just forget about them – do something about them! If you have a high cable bill, see if you can get a discount. If you have a gym membership that you're not using, consider exercising at home instead. There are many ways to save money on recurring expenses.

Follow this advice, and you'll be much less likely to kick yourself in the future. Aim for no regrets!

This post originally appeared on Forbes.

Save

Save

Save

The post 10 Financial Choices You’ll Regret in 10 Years appeared first on Good Financial Cents.

from All About Insurance https://www.goodfinancialcents.com/10-financial-choices-youll-regret-in-10-years/

[oliviarodrigobutwithnolicense]

SHORT STORY INTRODUCTORY PARAGRAPH:

This story is dark and gruesome, but I find that it really shows how well people mask their dark side and true intentions. It also shows how cruel and gory human nature can really be. Some people exist just to cause havoc. The plot follows a woman named Caroline who is an aspiring nurse. She had just graduated from college and struggles to find a job at a hospital. After receiving no replies, a strange hospital which she had no memory of applying to offers her a job. Caroline accepts the job offer and works at a nurse at St.Martin’s Health Care Centre. After noticing peculiar things, she slowly starts discovering the secrets that remain hidden in the hospital.  

The Aryan Incubators

My name’s Caroline Hoffman, and I had just graduated college with an Associate Degree in Nursing. I always knew I wanted to go into nursing. There was something about the world of medicine and science that truly amazed me. I also had a passion for helping people, so I figured nursing was my true calling. After applying to many hospitals, I was finally offered a job placement at St. Martin’s Health Care Centre. Strangely enough, I didn’t seem to remember applying to that hospital. In fact, I didn't recall ever hearing about that hospital at all. I figured I must have accidentally applied there while I was submitting online applications. Regardless, it was still a hospital, so I excitedly took the job offer. 

I arrived just on time for my first day. The hospital was located on the outskirts of the city, which explained why I didn't recognize it. The moment I stepped inside, I was greeted by overly joyous staff, whom which were all very welcoming. A tall man dressed as a nurse stepped forward, and introduced himself to me: "Hey there! The name's Kevin." He shook my hand and offered a tour. We visited each floor in the hospital. Every door leading to each room were labelled based off of numbers. I had a chance to see most of the rooms, and even greeted some of the patients in the wards. I was intrigued by the advanced technology the hospital had to offer. I wanted nothing more than to participate and contribute with the skills I had. The tour went well, until the very end. 

On our last stop, we visited the nursery room. I was really adorn with all the babies. I always had a soft spot for cute little infants. However, as I looked around the room, I suddenly realized that all the babies were really similar. They were all of fair skin, had blonde hair and possessed blue eyes. I happened to carry all these traits too, but it's not very common when you live in a place like Jersey City. The city's known for it's diversity and the fact that all these babies shared such particular traits seemed very suspicious. I didn't bring myself to ask any questions though, because I didn't want to send any wrong messages. I also didn't want to lose what could be potentially the only job offer I'll ever get. I shut my mouth, and carried on. As we took the elevator back to the main floor, I noticed there were five floors in the hospital. We were only on the fourth. I asked Kevin about the fifth floor, and he gave me a stern look. He shifted uncomfortably, "That's restricted area." I nodded awkwardly and kept silent until the elevator stopped. As I walked out, I was greeted by the same group of people who welcomed me in. “So, do you like the place?” asked one of the staff members. I nodded vigorously and forced a smile, but something was bothering me in the back of my head. All the nurses and doctors seemed to be white, with the exact same traits as the babies in the nursery room. I was really beginning to think something was up. “Welcome to the team!” another doctor exclaimed, as he gave me a high five. “Thank you.” I uttered out, flashing the brightest grin I could possibly force. 

I went home that night feeling very paranoid. Why did each and every single one of the staff members look exactly the same? Why did the babies look exactly the same? I shook my head and muttered to myself that it was just a weird coincidence. Maybe it was some sort of family owned hospital and everyone happened to carry the same traits from genetics. Of course, that would only explain the staff members and not the babies. The whole situation was eating my brains out and I convinced myself I should just be grateful that I even got a job offer. 

I spent the next couple weeks at that hospital fulfilling my duties as a nurse. I administered medications, monitored the conditions of patients, maintained records and assisted the doctors when they needed help performing difficult tasks. Everyone was really friendly. It wasn’t long before I started having inside jokes with some of the nurses and doctors. It was a cozy environment, and I loved working there. However, there were a few things that bothered me for a while. I was never assigned to the nursery room or the delivery room, even though I was completely capable of nursing infants and delivering babies. Another thing is, I had never seen the surrogate mothers leave the hospital after the baby had been delivered. I mean, I didn’t see them around the hospital afterwards, but I never actually witnessed any of them physically leave the hospital. Furthermore, hardly any of the surrogate mothers had blond hair or blue eyes. I purposely passed by the nursery room often to have a quick glance, and sure enough — all the babies were blond haired and blue eyed. I was so puzzled. Every now and then, I’d ask about the babies but no one would acknowledge how strange it was. I would always get the same response, “I don’t know.” They would either change the topic quickly, or act as if they had some crucial task to tend to. Lastly, there was still the matter of the mysterious fifth floor. It’s been an entire month, and I still wasn’t allowed to access it. I would receive dirty looks or clueless faces whenever I’d ask why it was still restricted to me, considering I was a working staff member. All these things stuck in the back of my head, and it was giving me a migraine. I was eventually assigned my first night shift. I heard hectic rumours about night shifts ruining your sleeping pattern, but I was all up for it — for the wrong reasons, though. I was determined to have all my questions answered — starting with the fifth floor. Out of the entire team, Kevin seemed to be the most touchiest when I mustered up the courage to ask him any questions about the fifth floor. When I found out he wouldn’t be working the night shift with me, I realized it was an opportunity to solve some questions. 

The hospital looked exactly the same at night, but I still felt a little more intimidated. There were a lot of people who were working that night whom I haven’t worked with before, but it was a good thing because they wouldn’t realize what I’d be up to. They all had this strange custom to be extra friendly, but it made me feel like they were hiding something. I mean, no one can be that happy all the time, right? Nonetheless, I checked up on all the patients I was assigned to and completed my tasks. After what seemed like a while, a nurse entered the ward I was in and called me on break. Nodding at her, I left the ward and made my way down the hallway. Making it seem like I was heading to the staff break room, I sharply turned at the end of the hallway and waited there for a couple minutes. When I made sure it was safe, I sneaked back across the hallway to the opposite end, and entered the elevator. My heart pounded as I pressed the fifth floor. I don’t know why I was so scared. It was just a hospital. The elevator opened and I made my way out. 

The fifth floor looked entirely different to the other floors. For one thing, there weren’t a lot of hallways like the other floors — there was only one big hallway with doors leading to many different rooms on the sides. The hallway lead to what looked like a final door. None of the doors were labelled with numbers. They weren’t labelled at all. The strangest thing about this floor was that I heard slight sounds of wailing and screaming from the end of the hallway, like mothers struggling to deliver their babies. It was odd though, because all of the delivery and nursery rooms were located on the third floor, and the third floor only. I figured there was more to it, because it wouldn’t be restricted access if it was just a nursery floor. I walked down the hallway and examined the doors on the sides. They weren’t like the doors from the other floors. Each door required a card to access the room. Furthermore, all the doors seemed to have a soundproof door-sweep covering the gap that existed between the door and the floor. It seemed odd that they would need to soundproof a door. It made me wonder what they were hiding. I realized I could never open the doors on my own, so I made my way back to the elevator. To my horror, someone had come up the elevator. The unsuspecting nurse stepped out the elevator, “Hey, are you new? Are you suppose to be up here?” Making the conscious effort to stay calm, I replied: “No, I lost my card. I don’t know what to do.” She looked at me in pity, “Here, you can borrow my card. I didn’t want to do the deed anyways.” She handed me a pair of latex gloves and a dozen trash bags. I sighed in relief and thanked her, “You’re a life saver!” She smiled and made her way back to the elevator. As soon as she was gone, I started wondering what she meant by “the deed”. 

My heart started racing as I swiped the first door with the card. A wave of nausea took over my body when I encountered the smell. There were corpses of mothers and newborns lying in a heap; all seemed to be rotting and months old. I didn’t want to take another step forward, but I knew I had to. I noticed that all the corpses belonged to people of African descent. Each mother corpse had a face of pure terror, as if they were screeching at something. There were signs of struggle on the bodies; cuts, bruises, gashes. My stomach started to hurl, and I backed out the room immediately. I questioned my sanity and was in a state of shock. What if the deed was to dispose all those corpses? 

I was terrified, but I somehow managed to push myself to continue on and open the second door. There were more dead bodies; this time with Asian descent. The corpses in that room were lined up and hung with meat hooks; the same way animals are hung in butcher shops. Their eyes were gouged out and nails ripped off. Dry blood stained their rotten flesh. There was a big waste bin located in the corner of the room. I walked over and looked inside: a mixture of guts, eyeballs, and blood was sitting in the bin.

There were more corpses varying of all ethnicities lying behind the other doors. Every corpse was mutilated in some sort of horrific way. One door had rows of hispanic bodies cut completely open. Their bodies laid on a big table, and looked like victims of human dissection. Another room had Afghan corpses. Each corpse was drilled onto the walls with nails. Dried up trails of gruesome blood streamed down the walls. The other rooms were no exception. 

Eventually, I made my way down to the final door. The screams of terror were getting louder as I advanced towards it. I was shaking at this point, and was terrified to know what was going on. I bit my tongue, and swiped the access card. The door opened, and I immediately regretted my decision of going to the fifth floor. There were dozens of beds laid side by side. Each bed had a woman going through a different stage of pregnancy. There were no doctors around to help. I rushed towards them and was horrified. Each woman had blonde hair and blue eyes — but that wasn’t the scary part. They had both their arms and legs amputated. All hooked up to an IV; tubes of fluids and nutrients forced them to stay barely alive. One of them spotted me and immediately begged, “Please, help us! You have to help us!” I didn’t know how to respond. My head wasn’t in it’s right mind. Another woman shouted from her bed, “You need to leave and call the police. You’ll be next.” I began to turn around, but paused: “What do you mean I’ll be next?” The woman looked at me in sorrow, “Look at yourself. You look just like us. Are you a new nurse?” I nodded without saying anything. “We were all new nurses. None of us applied to this hospital, but we accepted their offer unsuspectingly. They wait for one of us to die, and then they replace us with a new woman. You’re the replacement.” My jaw dropped. “I’ve survived here the longest. They stole three years of my life. These people aren’t real nurses or doctors. They come from a long linage of nazis.” My eyes widened as she continued. “They kill and torture all the unsuspecting surrogate mothers and their newborns. They also lure women like us and trap us here. Their goal is to bring back the aryan race.” The other women were still moaning and shrieking from pain. The woman spoke to me again, “Please, leave while you still can and send help.” I nodded as tears surfaced from my eyes. Right at that moment, the door behind me slid open.

“Caroline, your break is over.”

[davidcdelreal]

10 Financial Choices You’ll Regret in 10 Years

“All I had to do was turn in the form to my HR department.” It was a simple task but one that was shoved to the side to deal with most important things throw at us.

The form was a 401k enrollment firm and I my client was left wondering what could have been had she enrolled when it first became available to her.

We've all faced similar decisions.

Some we get right.  Some we are left wondering the possibilities of what could and should have been.

Let's take a look at some financial decisions that you'd kick yourself for in 10 years.

Don't do them!

1. Starting your budget way too late

I’ll be first to admit that I hate budgeting. Nonetheless, my wife and I both recognize the importance of having a budget.

Most people view budgeting as not being able to spend money on the things that you want to but the reality is sitting down and making out a budget is a freeing exercise. It frees you because you can recognize the areas of your life of where you are wasting money on things that aren’t important to you.

An easy example could be spending money on a cell phone package when you might not need all of the minutes with the data that it provides. Could you put that extra money toward a vacation fund or help pay for your kid’s college education? Using that money for something that is more desirable instead of an expense that you could care less about will put your money to better use.

If you have been putting off beginning to budget, it's time to start. Forget that you should have started yesterday, start today and discover the amazing benefits of budgeting. Some of those benefits will extend to other areas of your life besides your finances . . . .

For example, you might find that having a budget improves your relationship with your partner. If you're married, you probably know how difficult money fights can be to overcome. You know what?

A budget helps reduce those money fights because you're making an agreement before you spend the money. No surprises, no fights.

2. Not paying off your credit cards each month

This was something that my father struggled with and I initially struggled with when I was graduating college. I was picking up credit cards left and right and kept telling myself that I could just make a payment later.

Well, for me, later became never and my credit card debt started piling on and suffocating me. I eventually figured it out only after paying hundreds of dollars of unnecessary interest.

Unfortunately, a lot of people don't take the time to figure out how much interest are paying. However, if they found out, they'd probably want to pay off their credit cards pretty quickly.

Make an effort to pay off your credit cards quickly. The beauty of doing this is that it will ensure you keep more money in your wallet instead of giving it over to some large credit card company.  If you cannot pay them off quickly then open up one of the 0 apr credit cards so you can get your interest down to zero and pay them off faster.

Some people can't control their credit card spending. If that's you, it's best to stay away from credit cards altogether. While you might be missing out on the rewards, you'll be better off.

3. Blindly buying a financial product without investigating first

It amazes me that with the ability to do a quick search online that many investors are still putting their money into investment products and they don’t understand how they work. I talked to dozens of investors who have invested a large chunk of their life savings into something that they couldn’t explain to a friend or neighbor.

Do your homework, get a second opinion, and make sure that you understand how this investment works. How much is it going to cost you? Are there any surrender charges? These are the types of answers that you need to know.

I know a woman who paid over $3,500 in variable annuity fees and didn't even know it. Don't think it can't happen to you.

If someone is selling you an investment or an insurance product, make sure that you do your homework before you invest your money.

4. Putting your emergency fund on the back burner

Emergency funds help protect you from the inevitable. The thing is, everyone has a big financial emergency at some point. That's why you need to prepare.

It's a fantastic idea to have many months worth of expenses in your fund. Some people have three months, others have 12. I think you should have eight months, but choose an amount that makes sense for your situation.

For example, if you're single and have one job, you will probably want more money in your emergency fund. If you're married and both you and your spouse are employed, you can probably get away with less money in your emergency fund.

There are a number of places to put your emergency fund money. Remember, you should only place your emergency fund money somewhere that you can retrieve it pretty quickly without much risk to your capital.

One such place is an online savings account. There are a number of great online savings accounts that deliver quite a bit more interest than you'd find at a physical bank or credit union.

Plus, there are usually no penalties associated with taking money out of a standard online savings account (if there are, look elsewhere).

That's just one idea of where you can keep your emergency fund money. I recommend that you read The 11 Best Short-Term Investments For Your Money at GoodFinancialCents.com to learn about some more places you can keep your emergency fund money. But don't just stop there – act on what you learn and get your emergency fund moving in the right direction!

Remember: If you let your emergency fund slip into the abyss, you might find yourself down the road with more debt than you can handle. Make sure to replenish it!

5. Buying a brand new car that you can't afford

Vehicles are important for many, but remember that they can quickly turn into a discretionary purchase. Don't buy all the bells and whistles when you can't afford them.

The ramifications of a car payment well exceed the financial hit of the price of the car, and you can end up spending your retirement away without realizing it.

Listen, I know what it's like to drive around an old car. I used to have a '98 Chevy Lumina Sedan that was something a grandmother would drive. Now, I probably could have purchased something fancier or sold the car before I did, but instead, I decided that not having a car payment was awesome. But I certainly didn't always think that way.

I remember my professor in a finance class pointing out that he would take a bunch of vacations whenever he wanted to because he didn't have a car payment. And you know what? He was right. That one little point from my finance professor made a difference in my life, and it taught me the value of owning stuff outright. You can learn this lesson too and see tremendous results.

And please, please don't tell me that you're thinking about buying a brand new car for your kid in college because they need “reliable transportation.”

There are plenty of reliable, used cars available for purchase that are much more affordable than brand new cars. And you know what the differences are between a car that's three to five years old and a brand new car? There aren't many in most cases. So why spend the extra money?

6. Trying to be a DIY investor when you have no clue what you're doing

If you're not a financial professional or haven't been exposed to financial education, you really shouldn't be investing unless you're doing so with the help of a financial advisor.

I think the biggest harm in this comes when an older couple is retired and the husband has been mostly in charge of the couple’s investments. All too often, the wife is clueless in what they’re actually invested into and if something unexpectedly happens to the husband, she doesn’t even know where to begin. Hire a financial advisor who can meet with the both of you. Then, the wife has someone to rely on in case something happens and is super important.

Financial advisors can also save you a great deal of time and money ensuring your investing strategy is relevant for your situation. Don't go without this valuable service.

7. Viewing important insurance polices as being lame

If you were to die right now, would your family be financially okay? If not, you need life insurance.

And, that's just one example. There are a number of important insurance policies you shouldn't delay in putting in place: disability insurance, perhaps long-term care insurance if you're over 60 years old, and perhaps umbrella insurance.

“I’ll get around to doing it.” Those were the tragic last words of a husband that left behind his wife and two kids. What he was going to getting around to doing was taking out a life insurance policy. In fact, he had begun the process and gone through his life insurance options, but never signed the application and never sent in a payment so the policy wasn’t active.

In any other situation that wouldn’t have been a big deal, but in this case, the husband took his motorcycle out for a weekend spin and was involved in a collision that left his spouse a widow. What could have been a financial relief (a life insurance policy) is now added stress and worry to a grieving widow (the absence of funds when the family needs it most). She also has to deal with the fact that she lost her husband and the father of her two kids.

Insurance protects you from financial liability you wouldn't be able to cover with your emergency fund alone. Don't neglect it.

8. Treating your retirement like a distant second cousin

One of the first meetings I had as a financial advisor was when I was meeting with a couple that was almost two and a half times my age. They were hoping to retire soon and they sought me out to be their retirement hope.

When I started poring through their financial documents, I quickly learned that retiring early wasn’t even close to being an option for them. In fact, retiring at all might not be a possibility. They put off saving and planning for retirement way too long.

They had little savings and no pension and the only thing they could really fall back on was Social Security. Note: their savings was roughly about $60,000. Don’t procrastinate any longer. Even if you get started investing only $100 a month, do it.

Saving for retirement is critical. If you're trusting Social Security to be your sole source of income, think again. It's not likely that you'll be able to maintain your lifestyle with Social Security benefits alone. If you would be able to, congratulations, you're living pretty frugally!

Invest today with a financial professional you trust.

9. Neglecting important money conversations with your spouse

Want to crash and burn financially?  Try taking on all of your financial goals without getting on the same page of your spouse.

Marriage means you do life together as one unit.  All decisions, especially money decisions, should be discussed and agreed up.

Why not align your financial goals? Talk through your differences, learn to compromise, and get on the same page together. It will be worth it – especially down the road.

10. Being blind to your recurring expenses

Recurring expenses can eat a hole in your wallet. And you know what? Many people don't even know that's happening to them.

Take a look at the recurring expenses – large and small – and determine which ones you absolutely need and which ones look more like discretionary splurges. It's okay to splurge every once in a while, but don't go overboard.

When you are working on your budget, many of these expenses might come to your mind. Don't just forget about them – do something about them! If you have a high cable bill, see if you can get a discount. If you have a gym membership that you're not using, consider exercising at home instead. There are many ways to save money on recurring expenses.

Follow this advice, and you'll be much less likely to kick yourself in the future. Aim for no regrets!

This post originally appeared on Forbes.

Save

Save

Save

The post 10 Financial Choices You’ll Regret in 10 Years appeared first on Good Financial Cents.

from All About Insurance https://www.goodfinancialcents.com/10-financial-choices-youll-regret-in-10-years/