#but i physically CANNOT look at my own fics ever again once ive written them it makes me violently cringe

[boxofthings]

the lack of content always reminds me why I hate shipping ghostroach

[ry-ders]

a fic abt nicole meeting reyes a.k.a nicole comes to terms with the fact that she can’t keep protecting zach from everything. how did he get on the nexus? who knows. i fudged it. he's just there.

this is the most self indulgent thing ive ever written. the only person who wanted this was me. posting this literally right before we meet my aunt for lunch. not proofread lol.

"Nervous?" Nicole asks as she notices Zach's leg anxiously bouncing up and down. She brings the vanilla latte she ordered up to her lips to take a sip. It burns a bit, not having cooled down all the way. Nothing she can't handle though.

"A bit," Zach replies. He hasn't touched his coffee apart from that quick sip through the straw when they first got it. The condensation forms on the outside of the plastic cup, droplets of water running down its side. Usually it would be halfway done by now.

"He'll be here soon, I'm sure," she says in an attempt to console her brother. Him being ‘here’ was supposed to be 4 minutes ago, and with every second that passes, Zach looks closer and closer to calling it off altogether. She places a hand on his shoulder. He looks at her, his brows furrowed, but he relaxes slightly when she gives him a comforting nod.

When a man walks in looking pretty much exactly how Zach described him, she tugs on Zach’s shirt sleeve, startling him out if whatever reverie he was in. “Is that him?” She nods her head towards the man.

Zach sucks in a sharp breath. “Yeah. Yeah, there he is. Reyes!” he calls out, “over here!” He waves his arm in the air, acting like a beacon. A few others look over, but avert their eyes quickly.

Reyes, as Nicole is informed, looks over at them. A smile so bright that she thinks she might need sunglasses crosses his face. Well, isn’t he a charmer?

She watches him walk over, stride confident. A single fluid motion has him take a chair from another table, placing it across from them. He takes his seat. She doesn’t miss the way her brother’s eyes light up.

Zach opens his mouth to say something, but she beats him to the punch. “So, you’re reyes, huh? Nice to finally put a face to the name,” she says. “Zach’s told me so much about you.” She sticks her hand out.

Reyes takes her hand and gives it a firm shake, looking her straight in the eye. Nicole would take it as a challenge from any other person, but she does see a hint of nervousness in those eyes. Not as suave as he makes himself out to be, she thinks. He wants to make a good impression.

And Nicole can say it might have worked a bit better had he not been late. Whatever. Circumstances, right?

“All good things, i hope?” Reyes jokes, but there’s that underlying nervousness again.

“Mmm. Good things.” She sits back, once again sipping from her latte.

Reyes nods. “Good. Anyway, I must apologize for being late. Put simply, I got lost,” he laughs. He places his hand on the table, an invitation for Zach. Which he takes, of course. “You know I wouldn’t miss this, Zachary.” His thumb makes circles on the back of Zach’s hand, and Nicole swears if they start this sap fest with her there, she’s going to leave.  

“I know, I know. I was just.. worried? Kind of? My sister really wanted to meet you, and… yeah,” Zach eloquently says. He reaches for his iced mocha and takes a sip. That’ll cool down his nerves a little. She sees the red start to creep up on his cheeks. “So you want me to get you anything?”

It’s a pretty clear opening for nicole and reyes to talk one-on-one. “Just coffee. Black. Shall I wire you the credits?” His omni-tool appears on his arm before the sentence is even finished.

Zach shakes his head vigorously. “No! No, it’s fine. It’s not that expensive anyway.” He squeezes reyes’s hand and lets go. “I’ll be back. Play nice, Nicky,” he teases, pointing a finger at her, before getting out of his chair and walking over to the line. Reyes watches him walk away.

“Your brother is dear to me, you know,” Reyes says, turning his attention back on Nicole.  

“And you are to him. He literally cannot shut up about you,” she says. There’s a beginning of a smile at the corner of his mouth, and she nearly finds herself smiling as well.

But that smile turns into a purse of the lips. “I know you know who I am. He has told you, right?” Nicole nods. It’s vague, but she knows what he means. “I understand if you’re a bit on the edge about this entire relationship, but I can assure you-” he’s cut off by Nicole raising her hand.

“You don’t need to say all those things, Reyes,” she chuckles. It’s kind of cute, the way he’s trying to reassure her. Not that she’d admit that out loud. “Listen, as much as I’d like to play the role of the overprotective older sister, he’s a grown man. He’s 22, not 12, and I can’t protect him from everything. Not anymore. He can make his own decisions. All I can really hope for is for him to be happy, and you make him happy. Just keep doing that, and we’re good.”

Reyes breathes in deeply. “That’s a relief to hear,” he sighs out. Weights may have been physically lifted off of his shoulders with the way that they relaxed. “I was honestly expecting a few threats,” he says, seemingly more relaxed.

“Well, hey, if you want threats, I can give you threats. Hurt him, and I rearrange your face.” Her tone is far too chipper for something like that. “But I don’t think it’d come to that. You seem like a decent guy, Reyes.” She leans over and pats the side of his shoulder twice. It’s friendly. Soft, even.

He smiles. Maybe a bit out of fear. He likes his face as it is. “Thank you. I’m glad he trusted me enough for us to meet.”

“So am I. Saved me from hunting you down on Kadara.” And something tells Reyes that that is something she legitimately would’ve done. “You know, he was really nervous about this.”

“I can tell.” His eyes flicker over to the barely touched mocha. The ice cubes have started to melt, pushing the liquid higher. “But I believe his worries are unfounded.”

“They are,” she agrees. Another sip from her latte, but it’s mostly to hide her smile when she spots Zach walking back.

Zach lays the coffee cup on the table, right in front of Reyes. If Nicole notices that he moves his seat so that he’s closer to the other, she doesn’t say anything. Reyes gives him a quick nod of thanks. Just like that, Zach’s hand is interlocked with Reyes’s. “Have a nice conversation?”

“Oh, we did,” she answers as she leans back in her chair. “And you came back at the right time too. Remember what happened in that toy store on the Citadel when you were 7? I think Reyes would like to hear that.”

Reyes perks up nearly immediately, leaning forward in his chair. “You’ve piqued my curiosity.”

“Nicole, no,” Zach groans. “Please. That was so long ago.”

“But it was cute!” she snickers. “You should’ve seen him. He got so red. Okay, so it started like this…” 

[transguykeith]

i wanted to ask u a few of the writer asks but i can't decide which one i want to ask you most, could you answer all the asks? lmao if its too muh of a mission i can just decide on a few

It’s not like I’m doing anything else so yeah, why not. I just won’t ones that might not apply. I’ll put some of this under a read more:

1. Describe your comfort zone—a typical you-fic.

usually some sort of character study of sorts mixed in with scattered events to lead to an ultimate end goal.

2. Is there a trope you’ve yet to try your hand at, but really want to?

im a sucker for a good soulmate au, so maybe one of those eventually

3. Is there a trope you wouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole?

i would never write an abo fic, just no

4. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Care to share one of them?

um, a LOT, like a ton of them my main one is a college au of sorts centering around Yuuri and Phichit as well as Victor, its title is Made of Stars and its gonna be fun to write

5. Share one of your strengths.

i mean, i guess im okay at character studies, but i dunno, im really not super great

6. Share one of your weaknesses.

pretty much everything, im not great at connectivity or writing in a pretty style. like i just kinda write, im not particularly great at it

7. Share a snippet from one of your favorite pieces of prose you’ve written and  explain why you’re proud of it.

This is from chapter 5 of You’re Not Alone:He danced because he skated, and he skated because skating was flying. And somewhere along the way he forgot what had drawn him to it the first place. He supposed that that was what he was searching for some days, that spark that started everything.

That spark that started a fire, a fire that’s flames were the smallest they had ever been. It was almost funny how one small moment could all but extinguish him. A spark started it all, ballet was just kindling, ice skating was logs, and he was a forest ablaze. But it was as if that one moment had sucked the oxygen from the air and the flames died, it suffocated him.

This is a bit flowwier than some of what i write, it’s one of my favorite lines because it encompasses what i have him feeling in that exact moment

8. Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

I think this is one of my favorites, it’s from chapter 17 of You’re Not Alone:

“I’m glad too,” Otabek smiled. “It’s how this doing goes though. You dedicate your soul, mind, and body to the ice and you don’t always get to leave without losing something to it. It’s give and take, we’re all just caught in an intricate dance until the fates bottom us out one way or another.”

“When did you go all serious on me?” Yuri teased. He had gotten used to Otabek’s propensity for the occasional dramatic monologue though, they gave a good look into the head of his friend.

“Think about it Yuri,” Otabek clearly wasn’t done. “Here we are, the pinnacle of humanity, literally trying to carve a place for ourselves in history. We have to fight the fundamentals of the universe to do what we do, work against gravity itself all while having a timer above our heads. Who knows when it will expire and the ice will take it all away. We fight everything to be able to do this: the laws of physics, the passing of time, even our own bodies. That’s what makes you a soldier, we all fight this fight but you’re out there with a makeshift helmet and a sharpened stick while the rest of us have full armor and swords. And who is it that we see winning the battle time and time again, you.”

“Did you really drag me out here to give a dramatic monologue on how impressive I am,” Yuri flushed at the barrage of compliments. “You’re such a dork,” he buried his face in his hands.

I just really like how it turned out.

9. Which fic has been the hardest to write?

I guess You’re Not Alone just because of how long it is, but it depends. some of it has been very easy to write and some of it ( ahem my current chapter) has been really hard

10. Which fic has been the easiest to write? 

I’ve written a lot of little drabbles and one shots that i havent posted anywhere but the easiest was probably the little request i did yesterday which is either titled “Pretty Darn Cute” or “The second prettiest boy in the world”

11. Is writing your passion or just a fun hobby?

a little bit of both really

13. What’s the best writing advice you’ve ever come across?

if you have an idea, write it down immediately. it doesnt matter if youre currently engaged in something else, write that shit down or you WILL lose it

14. What’s the worst writing advice you’ve ever come across?

not necessarily advice, but like the idea of only writing it if you think its good

16. If you only could write one pairing for the rest of your life, which pairing would it be?

can I say Yuri Plisetsky and happiness, because yes

17. Do you write your story from start to finish, or do you write the scenes out of order?

I tend to write my chapters in order, but within each chapter i jump around a bit and then connect everything

18. Do you use any tools, like worksheets or outlines?

I have an outline in my head that i sometimes write down, im usually good about following it

19. Stephen King once said that his muse is a man who lives in the basement. Do you have a muse?

my muse is the genderless ghost that haunts me it stares into my cold soul and pokes me until i words

20. Describe your perfect writing conditions.

I prefer it to be kind of dark and i like to be nice and cozy, though sometimes ill be struck with random inspiration and have to write it no matter where i am

21. How many times do you usually revise your fic/chapter before posting?

Ha, revising?! whats that

25. What do you look for in a beta?I have never had a beta, but if i did have one i would like someone to help me idea bounce and keep my writing from sounding choppy

26. Do you beta yourself? If so, what kind of beta are you? 

I haven’t but i would be willing to if anybody wanted me to. I’m pretty good with general editing skills and idea flow

30. Do you accept prompts?

yes! please send me prompts i love them. I cannot exaggerate how much i appreciate being sent prompts

31. Do you take liberties with canon or are you very strict about your fic being canon compliant?

i would say im right in the middle about this, it really depends on what im writing though

32. How do you feel about smut?

ive never really tried my hand at it, i havent written anything that calls for it, but my next fic might

33. How do you feel about crack?

i kind of have written some stuff that could be considered borderline crack, but most of it isnt fanfic and i havent shared that

34. What are your thoughts on non-con and dub-con?

personally, i probably wouldn’t write it, but if its necessary for a backstory then maybe but certainly not in detail

35. Would you ever kill off a canon character?

oh certainly, just depends on the fic im writing

36. Which is your favorite site to post fic?

ao3

37. Talk about your current wips.

my main wip is Youre Not Alone and that one is getting close to its end, i know where it’s going and how it will end i just have to write my way there, but I’ve had some pretty bad writers block in regards to it lately

38. Talk about a review that made your day.

i got this one really long review gushing about how much my story meant to them and how reading it always made their day feel better and that was just such a nice review and it made me really happy. Another one i really liked was somebody complimenting something i did that a lot of other people complained about so i really appreciated that one

39. Do you ever get rude reviews and how do you deal with them?

ive gotten a few upset reviews about something i included in You’re Not Alone, but i cant do much about it. i once got a review about four chapters in asking why yuri had a menstrual cycle and this wasnt rude exactly, but how do you read that far without knowing he’s trans in my fic