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merlinthoughts · 6 years

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Season 1 Episode 4 - The Poisoned Chalice

- god fucking dammit here we go again, i'm bloody done with my life and do not, at all, want to see merlin die bc i don't remember anything except that, yeah, he dies and someone has to get off their ass and save the motherfucking day and kiss him

- i realise how much i swear in these posts bc 1. when do i not? 2. i'm emotionally invested 3. i have no other excuse i just like swearing

- AAAND NIMUEHS IN CAMELOT SHE THINKS SHE'S SO SLY WITH HER HEAD THING

- id recognise her in a split second tbfh, she aint subtle

- *heterosexual tension*

- merlins skin be looking so smooth this episode, this boy be wearing lots of Dove

- he looked so excited to be in the banquet, then arthur just fucking slashes him with “not quite” and his hopes and dreams are destroyed

- “wanna see what you’ll be wearing tonight?” arthur says as he's behind the fucking changing curtains, about to get undressed and show merlin his birthday suit

- i honest to god thought that was where he was going, but no, he was just getting something from behind it

- “tonight you’ll be wearing the official ceremonial robes of the servants of camelot” IT'S A FUCKING DRESS ISN'T IT

- aw damn id have preferred a dress

- that smile shared between them was the most adorable scene

- god

- i

- fucking

- love

- their

- smiles

- sm

- best thing ive ever seen

- i mean… hunty look at that piece of glistening butter beauty

- wow ok back to the episode:

- bros being bros and giving each other a handshake to destroy the mortal enemy pack and put together a family, we stan.

- as if a servant who has only had eye sex with another servant ONCE would trust them enough to say that one of the chalices were poisoned. like??? “ur the only one i could tell” LMAO NO?

- she's a sly fucking dog tfbh

- “if he kills arthur, uthers soul will be broken and camelot will fall” at this rate uther prob wouldn't care if his son dies or not, look at him, he's already mentally broken. he has anxiety and paranoia over magic. child services where u at in the medieval ages?

- i wouldn't believe a word she said, or well, id have believed it was poisoned but id say yeah no damn way you aren't in on it if you know which one it is. bayard wouldn't tell a fucking servant.

- HE'S GONNA SNAP ISN'T HE

- MERLIN FUCKING SNAPPED

- yknow what we say here folks? U DO U MERLIN

- okay i was fine if uther made bayard drink it but like the moment uther said “mmmh… no.” and slowly turned to merlin i think my arteries just crunched together and died so

- “if it is poisoned, he’ll die” HE'S FUCKING SCARED MERLIN WILL PASS AWAY ISN'T HE?

- “it's fine” he says, then starts to fucking choke

- ah fuck he's down

- my boy is down

- FUCK ME SIDEWAYS WITH A CHAINSAW

- ARTHUR CROUCHES NEXT TO HIM LIKE “BB NO”

- lmfao bayard looks so shocked, his face is in disbelief and confusion, he's like who tf done me bad

- arthurs carrying merlin fireman style this is what i live for folks

- did like nobody notice the flower stuck on the inside of the cup? like honestly if you take a sip you’d kinda spot it or perhaps even the person pouring the drinks would have been “is this chamomile tea? no? then what the fuckery-doo is this leaf in here for?” yknow. it's like that scene in Matilda when the angry buff lady completely missed a fucking salamander in her cup when it was the size of her bloody hand. it brings out the same mood honestly

- does gaius have an index for these books or does he just have every page memorised and know exactly what page to go bc I FUCKING NEED THAT it would make bio so much easier if i knew what page it was on instead of looking back and forth from the homework sheet to my textbook, then closing it by accident and having to find the index again for that specific page i need

- arthur wants to fucking go on a life-or-death journey to save merlin i've never been so happy

- this is honestly my favourite episode, like it may be really fucking angsty but i love it so much

- arthur betrays his dad and leaves his room even after being told not to just so he can save a servants life is literally my new moto

- NO IT WON'T LOAD MY NETFLIX IS STUCK ON 99%

- okay so while i'm waiting for my shit to load, i just discovered the new fucking tumblr rule starting dec 17 and i'm like 0.2 inches away from just spamming NSFW pics on here just for laughs

- like hunty, that won't stop people from posting elsewhere or for thinking about sex bc like??? whatchu gonna do tumblr?? get the fbi to erase it from our minds

- i think nOT thot

- watch me get flagged for just using the fucking term “NSFW”

- i'm gonna end up asterisking everything (is asterisking a word? wow it has red under it so like probably not but i just added it to my dictionary so uhh it is now)

- by asterisking i dont mean furry kin shit ew no

- i mean like N*FW, s*x, t*mblr, m*rthur

- god it took me like 20 minutes to calibrate my fucking wifi and fix the connection problem

- wow the stage for the poison increased by 75% in 30 mins, damn

- merlins like like having a conniption on his bed lmao, chanting arthurs name and sweating lot

- do we ever find out how uther gets that scar bc i'm like 100% positive arthur was a little child and swayed his fucking sword too hard just as uther rounded the corner. the sword then collided into his fucking brain and destroyed a good part of his intelligence, targeting especially his morals on how to accept people and how to be a good father

- that’s my theory

- merlin starts talking enchantments in his sleep while gwens watching, and gaius is just there like wtf merlin ur blowing ur cover “oh! gwen!! uhhh sorry. he’s just... in a latin study group in his pastime and has an oral presentation in minutes”

- omg, nimueh, stfu

- i didn't know dinosaurs existed back then, this reptile be whack

- y’know what's funny? ppl thinking dinosaurs didn’t exist. i find creationism very very very intriguing bc how fucking stupid could you be

- that sword throw was faker than my moms tits

- arthur could have done better

- k but like what if merlin’s hand wasn’t under the covers? like he was just throwing that blue ball around right in front of gwen

- can arthur like not hear her? nimuehs literally enchanting the rocks right behind his ear lobes and arthur acts nothing of it until those said rocks collapse and he gasps and suddenly he realises shes evil

- also his fucking hair in this scene looks glorious. perhaps bc it's pushed back rather than his bowl cut, but its doing things to my abdomen

- i thought for a second she was pulling off her mask to say “nimueh” and arthur was gasping bc he only recognised her after her hair was shown, just like in that scene with joker and harvey in the hospital

- OH RIGHT THE SPIDERS I LIKE COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT THOSE SONS OF A GUNS

- i’d be dead if those spiders came crawling up to eat me lmfao

- k so nimueh went from :) to >:D in half a second

- i'm smelling up those symbolisms, boys

- watch out pals cause here are some of them:

- merlin is the LIGHT of arthur’s life

- he LIGHTS up the party

- he gives arthur a BRIGHTER future

- he's the GUIDE for his path

- hahhahahaha

- i'm serious when i say i have a huge fear of insects (spiders count in that too, no discrimination) so i'm just putting that there, saying to yall id be fucking terrified

- gaius would be so confused, like we don't see his face here but merlins close-up sweaty concentrated frown, but he’s literally just screaming “ARTHUR!!” “FASTERRR!!” “YESS!!” “CLIMB!!!” gaius would be looking like he walked into something he wasn't supposed to. prob thinking he should just let the kid die so he doesn’t have to deal with this shit anymore

- UTHER LOCKED HIS SON AWAY I'M FUCKING QUESTIONING HIS PARENTING SKILLS

- that's grounding???? throwing ur child in prison???

- yes 999 can i have child services on his ass

- gwens so smart honestly i love her

- pretending to be a maiden for the food, god what a queen

- arthur buying it and saying “yuck you say this is food?! disgustang!”

- the fact that i misspelled disgusting but it autocorrected to disgustang (which is originally what i wanted but autocorrect shouldn’t have known) makes me consider if i should really check my dictionary…. who knows what words are on there

- they’re so smart

- and then this fucker ruins it all while eating his food, checking her out and saying yeah arthurs a prick, hyuck hyuck, realising only that wait fuck u aint the maiden

- how’d they know GWEN was the one not supposed to have delivered the food, what if it was that chick right there???

- welll….. maybe it's because gwen took her sweet time up those steps, staring as if she couldn’t blink at the guards below

- i forget what happens at the end of this episode besides the kiss, and there's like 9 minutes left my fingers may rot at this point

- wake him up! wake him up!

- OH WAIT HE DOESN'T FUCKING WAKE UP DOES HE AND EVERYONE PANICS

- YEAH OKAY I'M SEEING THAT NOW

- MERLIN STOPPED BREATHING

- LMAO GWEN IS IN TEARS

- “HE'S DEAD” SHE SAYS

- ARTHUR BB COME IN HERE TO KISS UR HUBBY ALIVE

- OH WAIT UR IN FUCKING PRISON

- WAIT UP, HE'S ALIVE AND SHE KISSES HIM AFTERWARDS????

- FUCK ME I THOUGHT FOR THE WHOLE EPISODE THE KISS HAPPENED BC HE COULDN'T WAKE UP THAT'S FUCKING WITH ME I DIDN'T KNOW

- i keep forgetting to switch up the cap locks, sorry if it seems im screaming im legit using my inside voice for most of the time just emphasizing my words a little more

- goddamn, everytime they say mercia i just think of “murica”, like those americans on the 7th of july or whatever date the “we love our country” day is, chanting it as they throw around beers and fireworks as people gather round in jerseys or crop tops

- it's not that hard to spot the european on here

- the most celebrated holiday here which contains a lot of beers and big pub gatherings (besides every fucking night honestly) is either new years, lowkey stereotypically correct saint patricks, and ig easter monday but that's more for the kiddos

- i mean ofc christmas and all that shit but im not the most devoted christian, i just like presents and small gatherings among good friends

- wow okay it wasn't the 7th of july

- i mean at first i looked up “USA day” (i couldn’t remember the name) and it popped up today’s date, and i was like no thats not it at all. dec?? its in like july i think. and i was close! it was july 4th.

- uther damn knows it's nimueh!!!

- i mean, he just overheard morgana and arthur talk about it, and initiated himself into a convo about it once morgana left, as his sneaky ass just slithered up like “hey man, u know that woman? yeah uhh, what she say? anything about me? no? k i know who it is tho”

- i thought he was going to apologize or like explain to arthur what's the sitch, but he just waits for five whole seconds before saying. “those who practice magic know only evil. they despise and seek to destroy goodness wherever they find it.”

- arthur, confused: sounds as if you know her

- uther, walking away: i do

- arthur:

- wow k lots of fucking quotes here cause it's the merthur reunion

- get ready babs

- arthur: still alive then?

- merlin: oh yes, just about… i understand i have you to thank for that

- arthur, leaning on the chair merlin is sitting in, stifling a smile: ah it's nothing, a half-decent servant is hard to come by. i was only dropping by to make sure you’re alright… i.... expect you to be back to work tomorrow

- merlin, watching arthur as he slightly walks away having embarrassed himself: arthur... thank you

- arthur, slowly: you too

- they stare for like 5 whole seconds

- arthur, uncomfortable: well… get some rest

- there we go folks: my eulogy.

- hope someone reads it at my funeral

#merlin #merlin bbc #merthur #s1 #s1ep4

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viralhottopics · 8 years

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Im A Millennial Republican And Im Sick Of All The Crying

Let me start by asking: do you remember a time when ones political leanings were a topic kept wholly and unequivocally private? I do. I remember when it was uncouth, improper, and just plain rude to ask someone who they voted for and why outside of intimate family and loved ones. Do you want to know why that was such an excellent practice? Because it didnt drive a stake between you, me, and everyone else. At the end of the day, your take on abortion, on the death penalty, on civil rights these are the innermost things about you. They are very personal opinions. This is part of the reason I am so against the liberal attitude. I dont feel the need to scream my opinions from every abstract rooftop I can find, gathering people to my cause. I also dont feel the need to cast people from my proverbial Olympus when they have (the audacity) to disagree with me or my causes. This past year has been a media circus and a shitshow. Ive long gone quiet as members of my party are painted as racists, bigots, and terrible people. It wasnt enough that the silent majority showed up on Election Day and blew your minds to say were here, were relevant, the Republican personality is still constantly under fire.

I am a young, female Republican that has voted for candidates from both major political parties. And I didnt make that decision blanketed in the ignorance of privilege. Privilege, especially racial privilege, is part of my life certainly. But I have suffered personally the way everyone suffers. And that is an important piece of knowledge to remember. Everyone comes from struggle. No one has a perfect life. Since when did the national currency become sympathy and pity? I have zero let me reiterate ZERO interest in playing the who had the worse life game with people my age. Because, believe me, I could play hardball if I wanted to about individual suffering. But I enjoy my privacy, and my dirty laundry is, unfortunately, none of your business. My struggle is not why people should notice me and remember my life. My sad story doesnt chalk up my measure of relevance. How about my sense of humor? My undying loyalty? My work ethic? Those are the things I want celebrated. Not the fact that Ive survived what Ive survived. And because Ive lived through real trauma, I want that to be the thing that defines me least. Todays democrat seems to be a card carrying member in the belief of youre only as good as what youve overcome, when theyre also championing the hope that one day, no one will have to overcome anything.

I voted for Donald Trump. Not out of choice, but out of necessity. Thats who my party chose as its representative. And, sorry to say it DNC, your party didnt bring a valuable player to the table. Im not going to be star-spangled thrilled for Hillary just because we share the common biological fact of both owning uteruses. Do I LIKE Donald Trump? No, I think hes a big mouth who says stupid things and isnt representative character of what I believe a president should be. But neither was Hillary Clinton. And neither was Barack Obama. In the light of no choice, I made one in the voting booth rather than being inactive.And maybe this is hard for whoever holds the position of POTUS, but I swear to God, there needs to be a stop on the current Commander in Chief rolling over like a pig in shit over the celebrity of the position. Youre not a celebrity you are much, much more than that. Youre our face to the rest of the world. Not a fucking actor or someone who shakes their shit on stage for my amusement. Youre not a star, youre a country. Thats the job you signed up for. Not appearing on fucking Between Two Ferns. Not creating photo ops of you shooting hoops with Steph Curry. Youre more than a meme and more than a dad joke. Act like it. Do you know why I didnt vote for Hillary Clinton? Because she was so goddamn condescending. What, because Im in my twenties, and youre parading Jay-Z and Beyonces endorsement in my face, thats it? Vote won? I dont fucking think so. The absolute last thing I am concerned about when it comes to a president is who star-studded, ZERO political acumen Los-fucking-Angeles is voting for. If the 1% of people who are so removed from financial burden, from prejudice, from hardship of any kind, thinks youre the end all be all of White House potential thats a major red flag for me. The American public and the American millennial is so much more than our likes on Facebook and what we read on Buzzfeed. And if thats not obvious to you, then youre not my candidate. Stop bumping tits with Katy Perry go to fucking Wisconsin.

Socially, Im a liberal person. I love the LGBT and queer community, and they should have every opportunity and every right to be happy in this world, whatever that may be. I believe in racial equality. Just because your ancestors were born closer to the equator than mine (because thats exactly what difference in skin color is) is a non-fucking-entity and should be treated as such. As a professional woman fighting to find a place in corporate America, Im definitely a feminist. I believe women of any and all races are capable, smart, better than the female stereotype, and a million other wonderful things. And you can keep your abortions, too, because I think theyre a necessity for people in special cases. But that doesnt mean abortions are for me. Were literally arguing a matter of life or death here, and just in case the sign-slinging left is wrong when we all meet our maker, Id rather not fall on that side of the line. Our welfare system is a broken, shell of a thing that doesnt find the people that need it and allows itself to be taken advantage of by far too many. I believe in a right to bear arms, because as a survivor of rape and someone who lives in a big city, theres no way Im going through that shit a second time. I believe in a capitalist country where the ceiling is only as high as you settle for, for individual instances of prosperity. The economy is a balancing act, and the more Obama poured his efforts into urban centers (his voters shocker), the more the working class in Middle America suffered.

To me, the prime segregator between a millennial voter of opposing parties boils down to one thing attitude. Far too many people today have their hands out for what they can get for as little effort as possible. Far too many people are bleeding hearts for every sob story. The modern democrat isnt waging a war against Donald Trump, theyre waging a war against a persons choice to be an asshole. If I want to be selfish with the money Ive earned and see as much of it possible in my paycheck, I have that right. If I choose to be uncaring about whatever cause and its GoFundMe than youve posted, thats okay, too. And you can turn your nose up at it as much as you want, but it doesnt stop it from being true. Newsflash, enlightened NYC hipster you are not the only people that exist. Just because you majored in philosophy at Fordham doesnt mean youre some renaissance man. Its fucking disgusting to paint a Republican as uneducated. I have a Masters Degree, and you can suck on it. In their efforts to be a social media vigilante for every Tom, Dick, and Harry with a struggle, the democrats have become the bullies. Theyll shame, troll, and shit on anyone who doesnt think Bernie Sanders is the fucking Messiah. In their efforts to encircle everyone in their warm, squishy embrace, theyve fleshed out an entire stereotype against 304 electoral districts worth of voters. The tables have turned youre the assholes, now. Youre no better than the Duck Dynasty backwater racists you paint most Republicans to be. Ripping down blue ribbons for law enforcement, Facebook status making, weeping on the picket line, crying on each others shoulders in the auditorium, straight up assholes. My struggle doesnt define me. My shortcomings are not my identifiers. I dont need your pity. And when I need your support, Ill ask for it.In the modern Democrats mission for extreme tolerance, theyve become the alienators. So pull your head out of your ass, young blowhard. Take a look around. Its never going to be Kumbaya for the masses. There is no safe space.