#but listen. 1. it's the drummer - they don't see shit and we don't see them

[heavenknowsffs]

I had my wattpad moment last night when the drummer of a band i went to shoot looked at me like 3 times in the eyes in between songs (when i was already in the crowd)

[dragonfliescreative]

Joel (oc) x Reader..

Ch 1. Getting Ready.

Huffing in an attempt to calm my nerves, i stare into the mirror. The outfit Chloe had picked out for the concert felt odd against my skin. i normally just wore what was comfortable, but she insisted that i dress up for this. apparently id feel out of place otherwise. if i was honest i didnt even know what i was walking into. she had been listening to Bloodied Daisies alot long than i had, hell she had been to their concerts too. this was my first time going because she won a raffle for backstage tickets.

"Are you about ready??" Her voice boomed through the door. Pulling briefly at the tight netting over my arms i respond "Yeah i guess so." And with that im met with my best friend. she had her blonde hair up in a spiky looking bun, and a matching punky looking outfit to mine. She covered her mouth with her hands. "Oh my god! Y/n you look so handsome!" she snickered, her fingers shortly finding my face afterwards to fix the makeup i had most likely smudged it while putting in my top. "Perfect." She grinned.

I followed her out of the apartment i rented and out to her little black car, that she had of course stickerbombed. Once we sat i tuned back in to what she was saying to me. "-and i hear he's quite the party-er. though if im honest im mainly there for Grayson. god he's smokin' hot." she started the car and we were off. the venue was about a 30ish minute drive from my place since my complex was closer to the edge of the city. "plus, theyre small enough still that they'll most likely drink with us. is that okay?" she asked, turning to me as she hit her breaks for the red light. "I don't wanna be like, wasted." I mumble. the idea of drinking around strangers never was a good one. "You can though, i'll drive us home." I continued, giving her a small smile. And there was that giddy grin of hers, it always made me feel better. "Perfect! im so excited! i know you dont party much but i promise you'll love it." she cooed, before going on to explain that the tickets she gor were basically pay to get in party tickets, and were limited to about 10 ish people excluding the band obviously.

The next 20 minutes of the drive was us jamming out to the album they were touring. I had to admit, I loved this dudes voice. Chloe went over the band members names and what they played. Joel, the vocalist and guitarist, though apparently he could play several instruments too. Grayson, the drummer, her favorite. And lastly their bassist, Arlo, who also could play a few instruments. The more we sang, the more excited i got. i had never even been to a real concert before, let alone one like this.

Holding the CD case in my hand, i actually started to look at the members. inside the case was a picture of them together, with their signatures beside each of their heads. She had gotten this at their last concert. Joel, a kinda small dude, covered in tattoos and freckles with a dark fuzzzy mohawk and green eyes. Holy shit he had braces too. Grayson, a super tall scary looking man, with long black and blue hair, way more piercings than Joel, and gnarly cutting scares all over his body, even his cheekbones. I see why Chloes makeup was blue now. And Arlo, taller than Joel but shorter than Grayson, a lanky androgynous person, with long hair pulled up in a messy ponytail, glasses, and just as many piercings and tattooes as Joel.

The more i stared at the vocalist i started to giggle "How tall is he?"

"Uhh, five eight i think?"

"that voice comes out of that little man?"

"mhm!"

"thats funny as hell."

She giggled with me "isnt it? he's honestly scrunkly as hell. when i met him he smelled like cigarettes and like a woody smelling cologne"

"Chloe that's oddly specific. Why is that what you noticed?"

"It's hard not to when he's just below me in height. his forehead met my nose."

I rolled my eyes and tuned back into the song, into the venue parking we went.

Notes: Grayson belongs to my friend!! @grioxim

Ch 2

Pretty Handsome Awkward Ch List



[an-orca-on-a-stroll]

sooooo I went to the stray kidz concert in milan yesterday :D i dont listen to a lot of kpop but i was with friends so i thought id give it a go. I'd summarize the whole thing with "sometimes. on occasion. I could maybe hear some music. under all the screaming" lmao

but fr I could not fucking hear ANYTHING like, at any point. bc everyone around me was screaming. CONSTANTLY. like full on shrieking everytime any one of the boys did literally anything during the entirety of every single song D: and i also couldnt see anything, i wasnt even that far from the stage but the screen placement was horrible. there were 70k ppl apparently and aside from the ones on the sides of the stage there was only 1 tower with tiny screens in the entire venue. plus everyone had their phones out, i'm not very tall to begin with so that killed any possibility of me being able to see anything...

anyway all i could hear over the constant screaming was the drums and the bass so if we treat is as a drum n bass concert it wasnt all that bad xD no idea how the boys sang i couldnt hear their voices and i couldnt see them dance either, but jamal the drummer & jonthe bassist u guys were lit. loved the instrumental piece they played in one of the intermissions where the musicians playing the instruments introduced themselves & they did a little led zeppelin riff + a SICK bass solo. nobody was cheering except me & maybe 3 other ppl in the entire crowd bc they didnt give a fuck abt the music unless the boys where on stage lmfao. rly it was so strange, nobody gave a shit abt the music, they just wanted to watch the boys and scream, i don't understand the point of going to a concert to do this. i had a girl close to me who did not stop screaming into my left ear the entire time. it was wild. worst fucking crowd ever. if thats how kpop concerts are im never going to one ever again, i had fun all things considered bc i was with friends & we were silly together we danced etc. but everything else was awful. 0 out of fucking 10

also it rained a little bit

[hamptersadness]

Today I learned I don't matter....

So it's day 4 in our state testing for gym and today we did modified pull ups which is when you pull yourself up but from a laying down position.

Well this guy (same guy that asked me out) he got 13 pull ups which was the highest at that time. But then I went and I got 14 and then he was all making excuses on why he got less then me. He could've just said good job.

He then ridiculed me for my weight I told him about 5 pounds heavier than I actually am. And he's all like "sounds like ur st@rving yourself" and "you need to eat more"

And then I was talking about ii and drumeo. And how he's like the best drummer of all time and the guy was like he probably isn't you just think that because he's cute

And 1 YOU CAN'T SEE II HES MASKED

2 IM AROACE SO I DONT GIVE TWO SHITS

3 I AM MUSICALLY TRAINED NOT YOU

Also I listen to his tangents all the time and I don't criticize them.

And then also today I was talking about something and my bsf kept interrupting (not really on purpose) but it did upset me.

Everyone at work was so mad at different things and so my brain is like "Some of them hate you blah blah blah"

Anyway just a vent

ALSO T SHOT CHECK!!!!!

[taylorswiftstylequestions]

hi sarah, i'm back again - the anon who was listening to john mayer and kept making connections to taylor swift lyrics. well, i was listening to the "this is john mayer" playlist because after being a causal fan since about 2010, i finally bought a ticket and got to see him play a sold out crowd at madison square garden!!! i'm sure you follow him on social media but i won't presume what you may/may not know, but he had two back to back shows at msg, and i bought a ticket for night 2. night 1 went on as planned but around 7pm on night 2, he shared that their drummer has tested positive for covid but the show will still go on as scheduled. after the opener played (Alexander 23, I wasn't familiar with them but they were great!) and they stage was being set, I noticed the drums section was still set up, and at jm's mic stand there was a chair today. and right off the bat, he played acoustic guitar alone and opened with "neon"!!! and then said they're gonna play a different show and be mostly acoustic and play some songs that haven't been played so far - and holy shit, did they! I got to hear "in your atmosphere"!!!! though it was a bit strange he sorta cut the song a bit short and didn't sing those iconic lyrics "Wherever I go, Whatever I do, I wonder where I am in my relationship to you. Wherever you go, Wherever you are, I watch your life play out in pictures from afar" and ended it at "Never mind". after about 90mins into the set, he made an announcement that someone he's been friends with for 20 years is here now to help play drums - and it's effing the one and only, Questlove!!! i don't think i'll ever forget how msg erupted into cheers and applause when he came on. i do have to admit now, i was sitting in the 200s/upper bowl and when jm came on, i was expecting everyone to stand up and was extremely shocked and also sad when majority of people in the upper bowl remained seated. a few rows behind me some people even got into an argument because some people were standing and those behind them couldn't see and wanted them to sit down. i personally have stayed seated maybe twice in my life at shows, only because other people didn't and i didn't want to block anyone's view. but i also love to dance and enjoy myself so when people didn't get up for jm, i was bummed. but then they did when Questlove came up so that helped and it just charged the vibes in the room a whole level higher. part of me was definitely a little bit bummed we weren't getting the usual show of the tour but then i got into it and realized this was such a treat. of course there were some songs i'm bummed weren't played, but now i;m just more determined to never miss his shows when he's playing near me again. he actually has a show in long island next week and i'm so tempted to make the drive down there, lol. this got really long so tysm sarah, for reading it - i just wanted to share with a fellow jm fan :)

( setlist: https://www.setlist.fm/setlist/john-mayer/2022/madison-square-garden-new-york-ny-b88610e.html )

Hoooooly crap I cannot believe you got to go to that show! I was just talking to my best friend this morning and bawling over "In Your Atmosphere" live you're so incredibly lucky. What an AMAZING show you got to see live! I'm so happy for you.

[power-chords]

Post-trip round-up, integration, thoughts (cut for length & some Heavy Shit)

WOW I needed that and I am so glad I realized I needed that. It has been well over ten years since I last took LSD, and my reluctance to indulge in psychedelics again was rooted in a long and complicated history that I don't really need to hash out here, but doing a mild dose of mushrooms last weekend gave me the confidence and conviction that I was ready.

Would it have been wiser to take a less bonkers dose for the first time in a decade plus? Probably! Do I regret a single moment of it? Not a whit! It's tough to overstate just how powerful, therapeutic, and restorative a good acid trip is, even an occasionally intense, uncomfortable one. I do not recommend eating multiple tabs of extremely good blotter on your first rodeo, but Adam's even more of a veteran psychonaut than I am, so I was 1000% well cared for, totally safe, and in a comfortable, familiar environment. In that setting, and in a positive frame of mind, acid is not going to throw anything at you that you are not equipped to handle. I would love to make this an annual or biannual thing.

The cool, funny, wacky delightful stuff:

Put it under my tongue at 10 AM-ish. Went to go listen to some music and doodle until it kicked in. I forgot that the come-up is like, do not make any fucking plans involving hand-eye coordination LMAO. I was trying to doodle Bowery Ballroom in an old sketchbook, and that devolved quickly. The markers were old so some of the caps were really stuck on there, and I wound up devolving into fits of laughter from the absurdity of pulling the caps off with my teeth.

Ink stains on my hands started writhing and trailing and were very cool. That was the first thing I noticed. I got very sad that I stopped drawing and making art, which was something I did all my life and almost went to school for but stopped doing as an adult. And then I realized I could start drawing again any time if I wanted to, and I didn't have to be GOOD at it or a proper artist for it to be worthwhile and fun. Felt immediately happy again.

Adam decided to watch Lethal Weapon???? I was like, Don't Like That. Even though he had headphones on and I couldn't hear anything. I am ambivalent about screens at best when I'm tripping, and at worst I don't even want to be in the same room with them. Guns and violence seemed comically, brutally stupid. Turned my back to the TV and continued drawing and writing until I could no longer hold a pen. Eventually Adam got on my wavelength and was like yeah, this is too much! (He took like, twice the dose that I did. I have no idea how he was even able to talk to me, but he managed!)

Felt the need to message Liana while peaking, picked up my phone, and saw that she had already sent me this:

I thought that was HILARIOUS (tbh it actually was, and it was not just the acid talking)

For the first few hours of teeth-grinding, reality-shearing intensity, Adam and I mostly lounged in bed with the shades pulled all the way up and the window open, cuddling and petting Ernie. Fantastic bonding experience for the whole fam.

Looking at every surface in the apartment became like looking at a stained glass ceiling, or an infinite mandala, or the muddied rainbows in oil-slicked puddles. It looked like Ernie's fur was breathing and someone had colored all over the white parts of him with a highlighter. Adam agreed with this assessment. Formica on the kitchen counters was bananas. So were the trees outside, rippling like celluloid and brighter green than I had ever seen them.

The two of us spent a good 15 minutes doubled over with laughter because Adam suggested a contraption for funneling Fancy Feast directly into Ernie's mouth, kind of like shotgunning a beer

Adam: "I can't believe I used to to this and get on the subway and try to do things with people." Me: "What? How did you even figure out how to get from Point A to Point B?" Adam: "I mean, we didn't, really. We usually got lost. It was fine, though." Truly, it's about the friends you make along the way!

The second half of the trip, when things are starting to mellow out a bit, is when you become a real rock star. I went outside for a walk around the neighborhood, and to sit in the park with my headphones on while watching kids play on the playground, and it was ECSTATIC. I was just overjoyed. My face still hurts from smiling.

Forgot that I needed money to realize my goal of obtaining a popsicle, so I had to detour back into the apartment and explain all of this to my husband before resuming the popsicle quest. He thought it was very funny, but sympathized.

Fresh air, popsicles and San Pellegrino on acid. On another level! 100/10.

Bathrooms still universally suck, LOL. -10/10. Not a fan of that bathroom while tripping face! Every time I had to pee it was like WELL here we go again into the Pink Squirming Hell Chamber (I am making this sound like more of a big deal than it actually was)

15 HOURS. 15 HOURS Jesus Christ lmao I did not stop seeing weird shit on screens and surfaces until like 1 AM. And even then, if I stared long enough, funky colors and patterns would re-emerge. It's a commitment. I feel happy and refreshed, but also totally exhausted. Definitely have to budget a full weekend of No Plans for any future trips.

The Heavy Shit:

There is some Cronenberg-level body horror right before the visuals get super rainbow-stained and stereotypically psychedelic, which sounds bad, but I promise it isn't. It's watching the veins pulse under your skin and change into very saturated colors, pores and hair and scars become very defined and wiggly, and as someone who has so much bodily anxiety related to my alopecia/IBS, it was weirdly... freeing? You get to experience all this stuff in an entirely new frame of mind, shedding judgment and old thought ruts. I remember thinking, "I do not need to feel shame about my body," and letting go of so much baggage.

At some point mid-afternoon I decided to retrieve my phone from the drawer again, and saw that I had a missed call and a voicemail from my dad. I decided to play it back, and he was just phoning to tell me that he was listening to a live version of "Sally Simpson" and Keith was doing this thing where he wasn't even touching the cymbals, and had I listened to that specific performance before and noticed the same thing, and wasn't he truly the greatest drummer that ever lived? "Anyway, no need to call me back, just wanted to let you know. I love my bubbie!" (His term of endearment for me.) And I went to go sit in bed and weep for a straight 15 minutes, the most cleansing, purging cry you could possibly imagine, while Adam hugged me and rubbed my back. I was overwhelmed, overcome by this feeling of cosmic Love and Connection with my family and my husband and all of my friends.

I had been sitting on and burying so much fear and distress from the past 18 months, the chronic, low-grade trauma that was worrying if COVID was going to kill my father, my best friend and closest confidante and the one person on earth who I feel truly Gets Me on a spiritual level, and all of that came out. Fully processed and released every ounce of grief. What replaced it was the absolute, unshakable faith that no matter what happens — including my greatest fear, which is inevitable, no matter how far off it may be — he will always be with me, and a part of me, in the music we both love, and I will never, ever lose that.

[undiscovered-horror-icon]

SlipKnot Members [Part Two]

[All of this info was copied form the archive of this blog on Skyrock.com circa 2009 -2010: User: maggot777 on Skyrock. com ]

[I’m just sharing it and take no credit]

[This post will include the current members, circa 2010]

Name: Sidney George Wilson Position: DJ N ° 0 Nickname: Monkeyboy or Ratboy Born March 15, 1978, Sid is the youngest of the group and by far the craziest. His scenic escapades helped to build the reputation of SlipKnoT in its early days. Since the European tour where he accidentally injured a fan during the concert in London, he has calmed down somewhat. Although with British origins, Sid is American and was born in Des Moines. Passionate about music, he creates a posse of Djs called Sound Proof Coalition. It is thanks to this posse that he will meet the group during Dotfest in 1998. “I don't know why, but this skinny dude with his red T-shirt and green shorts caught my eye that day. And then it must be said that a guy who listens to punk while scratching on hip-hop is not common, ”Shawn declared. Six months later, Sid will go to the Hairy Mary Club to see the band in concert. That night Shawn jumps into the audience and comes face to face with Sid. From this impromptu meeting was born the friendly rivalry between them, the goal being to knock out the other during the concert. For the record, this is the only time Sid has beaten Shawn. After this concert, Sid will meet SlipKnoT and tell them that he wants to be part of the group. The legend says that Shawn will not think more than ten seconds before saying yes, estimating the man enough barjo to join the group. Since then, Sid has been a mainstay of the band, justifying his presence with samples and scratches on many tracks, he's also working on a more personal project for which he took over his DJ name Starscream and released a solo album called Full Metal Scratch It in reference to the movie Full Metal Jacket. The album announced for 2001 did not actually see the light of day until 2004 following a number of problems with the label that was to release the CD. In the end, it was N2O that played the role of distributing the CD containing most of the samples that Sid uses in SlipKnoT as well as in various other projects. He also collaborates with Ampt, a band from New Jersey that he joined as a DJ.

Name: Nathan Jonas '' Joey '' Jordison Position: Drums N ° 1 Nickname: Speedball Born April 26, 1975 at the Mercy Hospital in Des Moines, Joey spent all his childhood and adolescence in the small town of Yankee, located fifteen kilometers from Des Moines. Very introverted because of his small size (1.60 m), Joey has often served as a pain reliever for his classmates, but he knew deep down that one day he would prove to them that he was better. than them. Arrived in high school, he is deeply into Kiss and Black Sabbath and decides to start a group; he held the position of guitarist there. The guitar has always been his passion and he plays it whenever he can. However, the pitiful level of the drummer in his group pushes him to get behind the barrels. He finished his studies in high school and decided to get into music. One of his groups (Modifious, of which Paul and Craig were part) has had some success but not enough to make a living from it. There is a job at a gas station. Working at night, he occupies his days rehearsing with the group. One evening, his best friend comes to see him with a certain Corey Taylor. Corey doesn't make a good impression on him and the evening ends with a sentence to his friend about Corey (who is red-haired and had long hair at the time): "Bring Dave Mustaine (singer-guitarist of Megadeath) to to treat, it is too serious this guy. " Some time later, he will be contacted by Paul to join an even more obscure called SlipKnoT group. Outside of the group, Joey is involved in various side projects, the most successful of which is Murderdolls, a punk / glam band in which he is a guitarist and with whom he released an album. one owes the magnificent tribal S and as well as the logo of the group. SlipKnoT's capital K is due to the fact that at the time he drew it Joey was a mega-fan of Korn.

Name: Paul Dedrick Gray Position: bass, vocal backing N ° 2 Nickname: Porky or Balls Born April 8, 1972, Paul is the only member of SlipKnoT who is not originally from Des Moines. Born in Los Angeles, he followed his family when they moved to Iowa. Paul is one of the creators of the group along with Shawn. Very discreet and yet very influential, he played with Joey in Anal Of Blast and in various other groups before creating SlipKnoT. He had moved back to Los Angeles when Shawn asked him to come back one evening because he had an extra project he couldn't miss. He died at the age of 38 on May 24, 2010 of an overdose.

Name: Chris Fhen Position: percussion, vocal backing N ° 3 Nickname: Pornochio or Mr Piklenose Born February 24, 1972 in Des Moines, Chris is the little comic of the group. Always playing the puppet, he does everything to be noticed and is happy to go on stage. Chris is one of the last to join SlipKnoT. He joined the group after Brandon left and his integration was not without difficulty ... for him. Shawn called him in for a rehearsal in which he had to prove himself. After two hours of playing, the group reunites in the garden while Chris, alone at the other end, paces. After letting him run around in circles for thirty minutes, Shawn finally waved him over and said, "Sorry man, you're not up to par." Annoyed, Chris lowered his nose and said, "Okay, it's okay guys," turning on his heels. This is the moment that Joey chooses to say to him, “We're kidding, man! », Before bursting out laughing with the rest of the group. But that was just a little taste of what to expect. He's the one we hear vomiting on the hidden SlipKnoT track while Paul laughs beside him. This memorable streak was actually Chris' initiation into the "SlipKnoT spirit", the others having forced him to watch a hardcore movie. Chris played an important role in the recording and mixing of SlipKnoT. He helped Ross Robinson and Joey with the post-production work. Ross Robinson says of him, “Chris is a great guy. He really has his heart set on his feet. "

Name: James Root Position: guitar N ° 4 Nickname: The Peach Born October 2, 1971, James (or Jim) is the giant of the group, dominating the situation of his 1.90 m. He joined the group at the end of the recording of SlipKnoT as a starting point for the previous guitarist, Josh. Prior to being a part of SlipKnoT, James was playing in Atomic Opera and Deadfront with which he released an album and was about to record another when Joey called on him. The latter explains: “James was one of the best guitarists in Des Moines. With Atomic Opera, they were by far the leaders of the Iowa metal scene. And then I knew the guy, he had the job profile. He also stars in Stone Sour.

Name: Craig Jones Position: sample N ° 5 Nickname: 133 mhz (we nickname him like that because he's crazy about machines and 133 times 5 plus 1 equals 666) Born February 11, 1973, “This guy is definitely the most crossed out of the nine. He never says anything and that's what gives me the fuck. It is there and yet we forget it. Having said that, it's better if he doesn't say anything. The only time he opened it we had nothing but shit. This is how Craig is described by Ross Robinson. This is hardly flattering but nevertheless very true: Craig is the “ghost” of the group, always the last to arrive on stage and the first to leave. He joined SlipKnoT as a guitarist to replace Donnie Steele. He will prove himself during the recording of Mate.Feed.Kill.Repeat .. He also contributed to the ambiences with his samples, which really impressed Shawn in addition to his performance on the guitar. Seeing his mad passion for machines and computers, Joey and Shawn decided to promote him and integrate him full time into SlipKnoT. In three weeks, Craig went from replacement guitarist to official sampler of the band.

Name: Shawn Michael Crahan Position: percussion, vocal backing N ° 6 Nickname: Clown or Kong Born September 24, 1969, Shawn is at the same time the leader, the pillar and the dean of the group. SlipKnoT is her baby. It was he who chose who would be part of the adventure and that from the start. Before joining SlipKnoT, he set up various groups which were only successful with critics. Unable to live on his music, he then manages with the means on board. He was first hired as a welder (this experience would later be used for the creation of drum-kits). The savings he made enabled him to buy the Hairy Mary Club, a bar in Des Moines called to become the SlipKnoT's lair for a few years. As a wise businessman, he will regularly organize metal evenings in his club and the Saturday night concerts will quickly become an institution in Des Moines for any metal and rock fan. It is during this period that SlipKnoT is formed. The future members of the group all hanging out regularly in the club, convincing them to play together will not be very difficult. Next is the recording of Mate.Feed.Kill.Repeat. Which costs Shawn all his savings and pushes him into heavy debt. He sells the Hairy Mary Club to repay his debts, before the scale gained by SlipKnoT allows him little by little to live on music. The Hairy Mary Club having been sold, the group had no room to rehearse, and it was only natural that Shawn put his family to contribution: SlipKnoT invests in his parents' cellar. They spent almost two years there, Ross Robinson came to see them rehearse before signing them on his label. It was also in his parents' garage that the photo was taken that served as the cover for SlipKnoT (album). Married with four children, Shawn is a very cultured person; he adores Cézanne and Picasso, which contrasts quite a bit with the image of the slightly psychotic Clown that we see at concerts (I confirm). He also likes to philosophize about life around a bottle of wine, which makes tell Corey, “Shawn is a very smart guy, even if you don't always understand what he's saying. "

Name: Michael Thompson Position: guitar No. 7 Nickname: Log Born November 3, 1973, Mick spent his childhood in Des Moines. Big fan of music, his tastes range from Jimi Hendrix to the Beatles through Morbid Angel and Deicide. He joined a group for the first time at the age of sixteen. Subsequently, he is part of various formations with the future members of SlipKnoT, but seeing that it is hard to make a living, he decides to give guitar lessons. It was then that one evening, taking advantage of Donnie's departure, Paul called him and asked him to join SlipKnoT. “I was really pissed off at that time. When Paul called me I jumped at the chance, ”says Mick to explain his arrival in the group. Outside the group, Mick is a very discreet person; he describes himself as a person who likes to live at night.

Name: Corey Taylor Position: Vocals N ° 8 Nickname: Faith or The Sickness Born December 8, 1973, Corey is in a way the guru of the maggots. His singing, his tone of voice and his charisma (I also confirm) make him a unique singer in the metal scene. Corey initially wanted to be a drummer but decided to write songs after listening to Screaming Life by Soundgarden and Bleach by Nirvana. Born of an unknown father, (but now we know who he is) he lived for a long time with his mother and his sister, traveling the North-East of the USA and sometimes (even often) finding himself homeless to sleep. Completely addicted to cocaine from the age of fifteen, he overdoses twice. The second made him realize the fragility of life and he went to settle in Ohio with his grandmother, to be far from his bad company. It was there that he developed a taste for music thanks to his grandmother's record who listened to rock 'n' roll and in particular Elvis Presley, of whom he became a very big fan. At eighteen, he chose to take his independence and return to the roads to finally return to his hometown of Des Moines. There, he assembles the group Stone Sour, with which he begins to record some titles. On several occasions, his path crosses the path of the members of SlipKnoT. And it is finally after a Stone Sour concert that Corey sees Joey, Mick and Shawn unload in the sex shop where he works. Corey sums it up in a few words: “Basically, they told me that if I didn't join their group they would give me my birthday. I admit I hesitated a little but finally I said to myself that it was the right choice for me. " Corey is very involved in songwriting; his difficult childhood is a source of inspiration for him. However, he refuses to talk too much about it. In early 2004, he married Scarlet, his long-time fiancée, with whom he had a son, eighteen months earlier.

[Might do a part three on new guys, maybe] 

[feel free to leave corrections in the replies]

[mickmarstookmyheart]

Life's a Sick Joke pt 16

Would like to start from the beginning? Here is Part 1!

Pairing: Mick Mars x Reader

A/N: Good morning/night/afternoon, you beautiful creatures! I know this story hasn't been really active recently but here you go the next chapter. There isn't much action in it, although it contains emotions and deep conversations. I hope you will like it. Stay safe, drink water and listen to music louder than hell!

16. Being There For You

After you got Mick from jail, which was pretty hilarious regarding that he never did anything to be in there, not even this time. He was at the wrong place, at the wrong time. He was still angry with you for not helping him immediately, but you let him fume a bit.

You were concentrated on something else. It was finally the day your brother would be out so you intended to get him, too. You seriously were tired of getting everyone out of jail. You were driving the car, staring at the road, your fingers drumming on the wheel along the music; Accept's Balls to the Wall was on and you couldn't help but silently sing along.

"I'm glad you have the energy to sing, but I couldn't sleep last night since someone let me rot in a fucking cell!" Mick snapped and you turned the music down. You took a long breath not to say anything you would regret.

"Mick, you only spent 6 hours there. You could've slept while waiting you know. And don't be angry with me, I wasn't the one who got you there." You arched a brow still not believing he was mad at you instead of Tommy.

"Speaking of, I can't wait to slap drummer. With a chair." He barked looking out the window. "And I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be so harsh on you, I'm just grumpier than usual for not sleeping."

"It's okay, I understand." You were smirking at him. He placed his hand on your right hand which you rested on the gear shift. "But you have to wait with your revenge until next Monday. You know we have the whole week off."

"Finally. We can be alone for a bit. Without anyone harassing us." He stated, closing his eyes and leaning back his head. You bit your lip down fearing his reaction to what you were about to say.

"Umm...but I hope it's okay if Dylan will be around for a bit. Or I can go back to our old apartment and let you rest at your house. I would like to spend some time with Dylan before we hit the road again." You turned in the next corner after looking in both directions. It felt like ages until Mick said something.

"Babe, it's totally okay. Your brother needs you. And he won't bother me unless he runs in the hallway screaming and almost naked smashing everything in sight." You chuckled knowing exactly whom he was talking about. Luckily, Dylan has never acted like that. Alright, maybe a few months ago but that wasn't the true him. Sharon exclaimed that he was improving and was on a good path. You had every reason to believe her so you weren't so worried about being with him in one room again. On the other hand, you were thinking of how jail time might break him. He was always so strong, although terrible things happen to people in jail who spend months in.

"I'm sure he won't cause any harm. So you truly don't have any excuse to have him in your house for the week?" You asked him cautiously for reassurance. To be honest, you were the scared one. You were scared as hell since you have never been to his home. You got together during the camping you brought them on and since then you weren't home or nearby even. The tour and then the hospital, the travel to your sister.

"(Y/N), there are a few guest rooms so he can crash at my place if he wants to. Or if you think environment change is the last thing he needs right now, we can bring back him to your shared apartment." He said warming your heart how kind he was with you, with your family. How much he cared for your well-being. Your eyes welled up and you got rid of the tears by wiping them away with the top of your hand. "(Y/N), what is it?" He stiffened thinking through what he has just said. "Did I say something?"

"Yes. But nothing bad, don't worry." He relaxed a bit but still couldn't understand why you were crying. "It's just, in my whole life I only got hatred, stating with our parents. I always I was just giving and giving until nothing remained for me. I started to drain out from goodness but kept going as Isabelle and Dylan needed me. It's not that I don't love them or they don't deserve it. I didn't have anyone I could rely on, or just have a nice decent talk about what is bothering me. And after meeting you, I thought I hit jackpot. And still, you keep amazing me with your kindness, selflessness, and your big heart." You exhaled when you finished your monologue making Mick speechless again. In the meantime, you parked the car in the prison's parking lot and stopped the car. Your hands rested in your lap playing with the key. Mick got out of the car and closed the door after himself before leaning on the car with his back. You were truly afraid. You hesitated at first but then got out of the car and walked next to him, leaning on the car. You didn't say a word. About Mick, he was fighting back tears, his chest rose and fell rapidly and you couldn't help but notice his jaws were tightened.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not being there for you." He begun, finally breaking the silence. Although, what he said made your brows knitted.

"Mick, we hadn't met, you wouldn't have been able to do much about it." You leaned your head on his shoulder making him calm.

"I know, but it's so unfair. You deserve the world, (Y/N). And if someone dares to tell me otherwise I will beat the shit out of them. And may your parents rot in hell, what they did to you is unforgivable. And I'm admiring you, (Y/N), for being able to smile and keep making everyone happy after all those horrible things happened to you. You are a survivor and I have fallen in love with you madly, deeply, and undeniably." You looked up at him, feeling lost in his blue eyes. You cracked a smile and hugged him tightly, filling your lungs with his scent. He pressed a soft kiss on your forehead, his arms resting on your waist pulling you closer.

"I love you, too, Mick. With every cell of my body." You whispered. You didn't know how quickly you found each other. You completed each other, you were partners, not just lovers. You were soulmates. A loud screeching noise broke the moment making both of you look towards the source of the sound. It was the huge rusty gates opening. Your heart was hammering and you were grabbing Mick's hand strongly.

"Hey, easy, Tiger." He whispered in your ear making you loosen your grip. At first, you only saw guards but then you noticed your brother in the distance. You were grinning and couldn't believe he was finally free after months. When the guards went back inside and the gates were closed Dylan looked in your way and dropped his bag on the ground. You let go of Mick and started running towards him. When you two met you jumped on him almost making him fell.

"Hey, (Y/N)." He greeted and spun you around as you were still hanging on him like a monkey.

"Hey." You could only say this. You were so happy to have him in your arms again. The real Dylan. Not the one who hurt you or left you alone. This was the Dylan you knew in your whole life. The caring, the funny, the goofy.

"I would love to carry you like this all the way home but it's either that you eat too much recently or I am out of shape." You chuckled letting him go. You were on your feet again when Mick approached you and you saw Dylan bow his head from embarrassment and guilt.

"Hello, Dylan." He said casually. No emotions, just words.

"Hi, Mick." He muttered still not looking in his eyes. He balled his fists then loosened them again by his side. He was still battling. It broke your heart seeing him like this. "I would like to apologize. For all the things I have said and done. For acting crazy and almost hitting you in the face. I wasn't myself. And I would like to thank you for taking care of (Y/N) when I couldn't. It means a lot to me." He offered his hand to Mick as an apology. Mick glanced at you and after you nodded he shook Dylan's hand.

"Apology accepted." He gave a half-smile and winked. He knew it wasn't Dylan's fault, well, mostly. He inherited anger issues from your parents, but he should've asked for help. "So, are you hungry?"

"Hell yes. The food was horrible in there." He complained, dropping his bag on his shoulder lazily. "Sadly, they didn't serve (Y/N)'s famous spaghetti Bolognese. You could say, I'm craving that."

"I didn't know a chef lives inside you." Mick laughed arching a brow.

"I haven't had the chance to show it." You crossed your arms in front of your chest like a shield.

"Then it's high time. So, Dylan, it's your decision. Where would you like to go?" Mick asked. Dylan's eyes googled from the shock but then went back to normal.

"I'm sure your kitchen is much bigger than ours. Right, (Y/N)?" You burst into laughter from that statement because you knew damn well how small that kitchen was and barely one person could fit there, not even three.

"Then, it's settled then."

∆

"Woah, you didn't mention you live in a fucking castle." You admired the beautiful house which was settled in a forest far away from any human. It was definitely something Mick appreciated.

"It's not much. But come inside." You got your bags from the back where Dylan stood.

"Are you nervous?" He asked noticing you were biting your lip and struggling to breathe properly. And the son of a bitch was smirking. Righ in your face.

"Fuck you, Dylan." He just laughed and took the bag from your hand. Mick has already opened the door and was waiting for you.

"My lady." He gestured with his hands, letting you go first. When you stepped into the house your eyebrows were nearly invisible. When you thought about Mick and his personality you were sure he lived in a dark castle, like vampires or just a dirty apartment. You expected everything but not this. The living room was bigger than your apartment, it was light and neat. There were two huge black leather sofas in front of the fireplace with a glass table between them. The walls were white and pure.

"Like it?" Mick asked smirking and wandering his eyes in the room.

"It's freaking beautiful." You stated.

"Bloody hell, this is awesome." Dylan had almost the same reaction as you.

"This way." Mick said, you and Dylan followed him. "So this is the kitchen, I know it's not much but I hope it is big enough. And the bedrooms are upstairs.

"(Y/N), don't droll. So nasty." Dylan joked earning a scoff from you. You had to admit, this was the most fascinating kitchen you have ever seen. You quickly wiped your mouth but there was nothing.

"You are nasty!" You elbowed him in the stomach when Mick didn't pay attention earning a groan from Dylan.

"You haven't changed a bit." He murmured, trying to keep up with you.

"So, Dylan, your room will be at the end on the right. You will find towels in the wardrobe, too." He noted.

"Thanks, man. I think I will go, I don't want to bother." He winked and headed to the room but before he entered he winked and gave you a thumb up.

"Sometimes, I feel the urge just to choke him. Just a little bit." You said. Mick chuckled and took your hand into his. Butterflies in your stomach kept reminding you that you were in his house and apart from Dylan, only the two of you were there. No Nikki, no Tommy, no Vince. No concerts, no shouting, screaming, or breaking glasses. Just quiet, peace, and you.

"I'm pretty curious about your reaction so close your eyes and don't open until I say so." You nodded and did as told. He helped you not to hit anything. "Okay, now you can open it."

You cautiously and slowly opened your eyes from the sudden brightness. Huge windows were in charge of the light. However, many other things drew your attention. At least, 10 guitars were hanging on the wall along with pieces of vinyl. He knew guitars were your weakness and he was right there smiling from seeing your reaction. You were speechless.

"Dear Satan, this is beautiful." You held up your hand to hide your open mouth.

"I knew, you would like it!" He snickered and showed you around in his room. There were some bookshelves, tapes, and other types of vinyl as well. You noticed some family pictures as well. "Yeah, well, Susie hasn't changed a bit."

"These photos are adorable." You put down the frame and turned to him. "So, do you have any plans for the day?"

"What about your famous Spaghetti Bolognese Dylan was talking about?" He asked pulling you closer his eyes not leaving yours. You could feel his breath on your skin and his hands on your hips. "Or we could let him rest a bit and try if we fit in the bed?"

"Oh, I thought I would get a guest room as well." You joked earning a small laugh from him.

∆

"Gosh, how much I missed this!" Dylan was filling his mouth with your spaghetti and it appeared that Mick loved it, too. You were holding a glass full of wine and were watching them.

"It's nothing special, actually. Just some secret ingredients, that's all." You noted. "However, I'm glad that criminals love my food." You added while taking a sip.

"What?" Dylan inquired with raised brows. "Don't- don't tell me you were arrested, too. Cause I won't believe it."

Mick rolled his eyes and kept his attention on his plate.

"It wasn't me, alright? And can we just forget about it?"

"Then welcome to the club, man. Don't worry, you are not bad. She also sat in there for a few days." He tilted his head towards you making you choke on your wine.

"Nothing surprises me anymore." Mick chuckled shaking his head.

That day, you felt loved. By Mick, and by Dylan. Both are a different kind of love, but you felt special. For a long period, it was the first day, you felt safe. No fire, no drunk people trying to flirt with you, no drugs. Of course, only for a week. Then you will have to go back, but first, you wanted the enjoy every minute of being with Mick and your brother.

∆

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[karasunoloomer]

only shallow (haikyuu!! band au)

chapter 1: first impressions wc: 1.5k synopsis: yachi hitoka joins a band. envy and tinnitus ensues. masterlist an: literally just a passion project of mine i'm working on to pass the time. a lot of call outs to my favourite bands will come sooner or later. self indulgent? entirely so. do i care? yes but pretend i don't

read under the cut!

This was it. She could hear the band from the outside of the house; a consistent, yet disorganised stream of music thumping against her ears, growing louder as she steps closer to the front door.

"Yachi, you can do this!" The blonde girl tells herself. The cocoons of nervousness in her stomach kept at bay for the past week, had finally emerged as butterflies. She'd never met these people in real life, spare talking to the drummer on the phone, and a million possibilities swan through her mind.

Would they like her? Will she be good enough for them? Was this a ruse for a money laundering scheme, or worse a sight for a potential kidnapping? She had work in just under half an hour, and being kidnapped was not factored in to her schedule.

Trying to shake the intrusive thoughts off her mind she knocks on the door. The music continued. Okay. They just didn't hear her. She takes a deep breath, and knocks again, louder this time.

"Oh shit I think that's her!" a voice behind the wall exclaims and the music stops. Thirty seconds later and the door opens with a boy just taller than her popping his head through. "Yachi?"

She nods as he unlocks the screen door in front of her, "Come on through, we usuallly practice in Tsuki's garage. It's just down the hallway!"

His eagerness and enthusiasm prompts Yachi to recognise him as the one who had taken her call. To be honest, she still didn't know what had come over her when she decided to answer the ad. It was just so happened that one night, while she was on the closing shift, she spotted it. It was hand written, stuck on the community notice board snuggled in a spot beneath the lost pets and above the second hand cars.

Looking for a bandmate to jam with :) Musical experience is preferred. We're looking to make it big, so commitment is key. If you're interested call the number below:

Yachi did have musical experience, although it was more polished than the DIY vibes she got from the advertisement. Learning piano, at the request of her mother, for twelve years did come in handy on rare occasions. She hadn't played in front of an audience since her first year in high school, so she didn't have the performance skills for a live band. But on the other hand, she thought, the years of lessons and sore fingers had to account for something, even if it was just playing chords on a keyboard. This wasn't like the proper, school recitals. This was a band. Where she'd have creative freedom and make friends and jam out.

Her life was at a stalemate at this point in time, the hope of university was still there, although Yachi had to first endure the drudgery of work. Joining a band would bring some flavour to her routine, and encourage her to get out and talk to people; people who weren't her co workers or entitled customers. With this in mind, Yachi pulled one of the numbers off and placed it in the pocket of her apron.

Which led her here. In someone's garage, staring at a bunch of boys she'd never met in her life. The butterflies were going crazy by now, and she was trying her very best to stop the word vomit from coming up.

"Everyone, this is Yachi, she answered the ad," the ginger announces, the enthusiasm in his voice ever present. "I'll introduce you to the guys first! The one who looks really scary is Kageyama, he plays guitar and is a super genius."

Yachi spots a black haired boy with a stern look on his face and her knees nearly give way.

"...The tall guy is Tsukishima and he plays bass. Don't worry if he's mean, he's like that with everybody."

Tsukki nods at Yachi.

The ginger boy then points to the person checking cables, "That's Tadashi, he's our vocalist and sometimes plays tambourine."

Tadashi pauses his work to wave at Yachi. She meekly waves back.

"And the best for last," he gestures to himself. "I'm Hinata and I'm the drummer!"

Yachi gulps. They looked so sophisticated, and so scary, something she couldn't pull off in a million years. "Hi everyone," she murmurs softly, failing to meet anyone's eyes.

"What instrument do you play?" Kageyama asks, failing to recognise her nervous demeanour.

"Oh um, I used to play piano, and I know that piano players aren't really needed in bands a lot but I figured I could play keyboards or help out with musical composition." The word vomit had started, she knew it wouldn't help her case but she continued anyway, "You guys don't have to let me be in your band if you think I'm too bad at it or anything..."

Kageyama cuts her off, "You play piano?"

Yachi nods.

He looks at Hinata, a pissed off expression on his face. "Hinata, we needed another guitarist."

Guitarist???

"S-s-sorry Kageyama I forgot to put that on the ad."

"Shoegaze bands don't need pianists. The guitars are the most important part. Does she even know what shoegaze is?"

She didn't. Yachi's heart sinks, the nervousness replaced with the sting of disappointment. As Kageyama and Hinata bicker, the two trying to pin the blame on eachother. Yachi decides to make her way out of the house before the tears well up. Figuring there was no point sticking around if she wasn't wanted.

A voice perks up. "You know, Yachi was the only person who answered the ad. If we dismiss her abilities entirely we could be missing out on a chance to strengthen our instrumentation."

The two are silenced. Yachi stops, turning her head back in surprise, to see Tsukki with arms folded.

He continues, "Going the purist route like Kageyama here will only make us run of the mill copycats. If we don't somehow innovate the sound we'll be forgettable. I think someone classically trained could be an asset and could push our music in a different different."

"See Kageyama?" Hinata exclaims. "She'll be great! What do you think Tadashi?"

The brown haired boy- was that a tint of green?- shrugs. "I can fill in as a second guitarist if Kageyama really wants it. I don't see why Yachi shouldn't be in the band."

He turns to Kageyama, who has been quiet since Tsukki initially spoke up. He stares at Yachi directly, his unreadable gaze making her tremble. He breaks it and addresses Tsukki, "You're right." More silence. "We'll trial her, and if she fits she can join us permanently. We can't guarantee she'll mesh well with our sound just yet."

A sigh of relief escapes her. She was in! Well, not in just yet, but they were willing to give her a shot! "Thank you so very much you guys for letting me join. I'll try my best, I promise. Thank you thank you thank you!"

Hinata pats on her the back. "That's totally alright Yachi! It'll be awesome with you around, I'm sure you'll do great. Right guys?"

Tadashi gives a thumbs up, Kageyama's face remains unchanged and Tsuki shrugs.

"Once again thanks," Yachi smiles, her shoulders loosening up and breathing a small smile of relief. She turns to walk out the door, calling behind her, "Please text me when you guys are practicing next!"

"Are you leaving already?" Hinata pouts. "We can't hear you play."

"Oh I'm super sorry!" Yachi says, flustered once more. "I just have work. Next time I promise I'll bring my keyboard and jam out with you guys. I swear!....Ahhh!"

Kageyama's hand is on her shoulder. He hands her a torn piece of paper, covered with his handwritten scrawl. "I made a list of shoegaze albums. Listen to these. They're important."

"Uhh.. thank you." She pockets the piece of paper and then turns around to wave at her newly found band mates, "See you guys!"

Finally out of the garage, and making her way towards the store, she reads the list Kageyama has given her. Yachi could almost admire his passion for the genre; quite a few albums were listed with hasty notes detailing the important aspects she should look out for, but the stench of elitism he exuded kept her from fully acknowledging his prowess.

She had no idea how she'd find the time to listen to the extensive list of music he'd given her before their next rehearsal. She spent the majority of her time working and her manager barely let her play her own music in the store, instead subjecting her to repeated listens of Green Day. Regardless, Yachi thinks to herself, she needs to listen to this. It was essential to keeping her on Kageyama's good side, improving her chances to be included in the band as a worthy musician.

Her eyes glance at the album listed first. It is circled, and the title written over at least five times to give the impression it's bolded. Beside it: "MOST IMPORTANT- IF YOUR (Yachi cringes slightly) GOING TO LISTEN TO ONLY ONE, PICK THIS ONE!!!!"

"Loveless," she whispers the title to herself, grabbing her phone to look up the album. "Let's go."

[treadmilltreats]

Allowing self expression 

Recently I read that Alicia Keys son wanted to paint his nails but he was worried about getting picked on. She was upset about that because she feels that everybody should have freedom of expression, of who they are. I am a big believer in being who you are, being true to yourself.

There's nothing worse than having to live a lie as someone else or as someone, that someone wants you to be.

 I have always taught my girls to dance to the beat of their own drummer as I have all my life. Growing up in a small country town where everybody was redneck, I didn't fit in. My whole family lived in the city and I wanted to be that city girl so I would dress like I was one. Here I was with my Joan Collins hats with veils (okay, older than dirt reference)  with my matching pocketbooks and shoes, looking like I just stepped out of vogue magazine, walking into a redneck bar when everybody else was in flannel shirts and shit kicking boots.

But I didn't care, I always did me, like it or not talk about me or not, I didn't care.

When my girls were growing up I allowed them to get piercings, I allowed them to get their hair colored, all colors, pink and purple and green, whatever they wanted.

I allowed their choices in clothes, they got to pick who they wanted to be  and how they dressed. There were many other things I could fight about with my kids but self-expression was definitely not one of them. 

You need to let your kids have self expression, why is it that we want to be like everyone else? What fun is that? You need to be who God made you to be, unique, different, out there and there's nothing wrong with that. What's wrong with being who you truly are? Whether you're straight or gay or transgender or loud or flamboyant, it doesnt matter, this is what makes the world go around, this is what makes this place is so amazing, is that we all all are so different.

 So why is it that so many people want to put us in a cookie cutter box? What's the big deal if her son wanted to get his nails painted, it doesn't necessarily mean it's going to "turn him gay" whatever the hell that stupid saying means. Many rock and roll stars nowadays are straight and they paint their nails because again, it's a freedom of expression. 

 Why is it that people are so fast to point and talk about people? Look we all just want to be who we are. 

 I always told my girls that yes, people may talk about you and yes, people may laugh at you or taunt you or be cruel to you but keep being you.

I also told them people talk shit even when they don't know you and don't know about you or who you truly are. I told him the story of how growing up, I had only guy friends because I was a tomboy and that I used to only hang out with the boys at school. Everybody in school called me a whore, even though I was a virgin, who was dating the same high school sweetheart for 6 years but if you talked to anybody and they would say that I was giving it up to all the boys that I hung out with.

That was farthest from the truth, in fact I saved my virginity until I was eighteen and it was with my high-school sweetheart. 

 That's why I told my girls don't listen to people because they're going to talk shit no matter what, so just do your own thing, just do you.

These are the lessons that I hoped I  taught my girls and hopefully they will pass along to their children, one day.

That is the problem with the world today, we are not accepting of people. Why can't we just accept people for who they are? Why can't we have compassion for people? Why can't we just let people be who they are, wonderfully made in God's eyes. Why must we judge them? Why must we be mean? Why was there so be so many haters out there? Look stay in your own lane, do your own thing, leave others alone and let them do theirs. Why is that so hard in today's society?

 I'll never forget when my best friend decided to come out, he told everybody before he told me and when he finally told me (which duh! I had known already for years without him saying it)

 I asked him why I was the last one to know? I was mad about that fact and he said because my opinion mattered the most. I looked him in his eyes and I said you're my best friend, you're the same person you were 10 minutes ago, the only thing that changed is who you like to sleep with and I couldn't care less. That's how we all should be.

 That is why if you look at my circle of friends it's like the United Nations. I have black friends, white friends, Spanish friends, Jewish friends, gay friends, straight friends... it doesn't matter because I see a person for who they truly are,in their souls. That's the only thing that should matter, so stop labeling people, stop putting people in boxes. I don't believe in that, I don't believe in boxes, I don't believe in labels, I believe in expressing yourself the way you want to. Express yourself with being who you are, with doing what you want to, with wearing what you want. You get one life, don't let somebody tell you how to live that life, do you, live large, be flamboyant, be loud, be crazy, this is what makes the world go around.

 I'll leave you with one last story when I was married for 24 years, my ex-husband wanted me to be a certain way but when he first met me he met the true me. The me that curses, the me that laughs loud, the me that talks everybody, that has a lot of guy friends. The me that is the life of the party, outgoing, positive and larger than life but then when he got me he wanted to change me into something that he wanted me to be. He wanted this perfect image of this perfect family so he no longer wanted me to laugh out loud or be loud or curse or dress a certain way,he wanted his perfect version of me which was nothing like who I truly was.

Because I was in love with him and I wanted to please him, so I started to change things about me and little by little I lost who I truly was. Everyday I was more and more miserable because I wasn't being who God made me to be. 

One weekend I went away with a bunch of high school friends and I got to be who I really was, because they knew me and they loved me for me and they didn't judge me. When the weekend was over and I was coming back home I had an anxiety attack and had to pull the car over because I couldn't breathe and I was crying so bad.

I didn't want to go back to this box that my ex-husband painted for me to live in. I didn't want to be that person anymore, I wanted to be the person I was on that beach that weekend, the real me. That's when I realized that I couldn't do this anymore, I couldn't be who some who he wanted me to be. That is when I knew it was over and I had to leave because I was dying a slow death being what someone else wanted me to be.

 So today my friends, my message to you is be you, do you, dance to the beat of your own drummer, dance in the streets, sing out loud and off-key, be whoever you want to be and don't be ashamed of it.

If you have children teach them this lesson, let them paint their nails let them have crazy hair colors and piercings and dress the way they want to dress because they are developing who they are. Don't stifle them, don't put them in the box that you want them to be in because trust me you're going to make them miserable.

 I applaud Alicia Keys for allowing her son to dance to the beat of his own drummer and I really hope this opens up a dialogue between parents and children and everybody else out there to have compassionate for everybody,  because that's what this world needs right now, more of that.

Live and let life and be tolerant of others self expression.

"Be the change you want to see"

 

"And just when the caterpillar thought his life over...he turned into a beautiful butterfly"

**Now released my latest book**

The Blessing in Disguise.... revealed

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[treadmilltreats]

Not just following the flock

I've always been one to follow the beat of my own drummer. I never really was a follower, I was more of a leader and this goes for all aspects in my life. 

I've taught my girls to always dance to their own drummer, ask questions, follow your gut instints. So recently at a checkup I found out that I had high cholesterol and right away, without even a discussion with me, my doctor wants to put me on medication.

 Now mind you he didn't ask me, he just told me like he was God and I had to listen. Let's not even go there because he actually thought he was as he was a condescending smuck but that's besides the point. He actually told me when I was telling him I was having stomach problems that it was because I didn't eat enough rice and beans. Seriously?? I can't make this shit up people! But I live in Miami what can I expect. 

Anyway I told him that before I took any kind of medication I would need to know the name of it and do some research about it. I want to know how long has it been on the market? What kind of side effects it has? The benefits of it, versus the side effects, ect. These are things I need to know because I am not a guinea pig for the government and I don't care if it's FDA approved, that means nothing to me except how much money they got in their pockets from the drug manufacturers.

He got all indignant with me and said he knew what was best and he had been prescribing this to everyone. Well wake up and smell the Cafecito doctor! That ain't me, I'm just not following the flock, I am the doctor of my own health.

I'm all about doing your research, this is your life, this is your body, this is your ailment and you need to be involved and not just follow what the doctors prescribe or tell you. Listen, most of the doctors out here are going off of the drug companies reps that come in with the pretty girls in short skirts bearing gifts for them. They are there  to peddle their drug of the month and this is how it works, this is a 333 billion dollar business. Yes, you read that right 333 billion, with a capital B. 

Maybe, if these doctors are lucky they get five minutes of the highlights of the "new" drugs that they are trying to peddle before the pretty girls are off to the next office, peddling their goods there

Then there's so much on TV about ask your doctor about this prescription, or that prescription 

You've seen the ads "Ask your doctor if is right for you"

Why are you asking your doctor what is right for you? Vecause these million dollar ads tell you too?

 These drug companies are only out for their bottom lines and they do not care about you or your disease. Most of these drugs that they're trying to peddle have more side effects than what you actually have.

Listen if you can to the announcer at the end that talks a hundred miles per hour and he will tell you this may cause your leg to fall off, may cause you to go blind, grow another ear, glow in the dark but your thinking I only have a rash? Now my leg is going to fall off? Wtf?

No one seems to take a stance against these drug companies because it is big money and no one has enough balls to do it. Every other country has a cap on what drug companies can charge but us, why is that? Because we are corrupt that's why.

The doctors in this country have put the whole country under a drug induced fog, they are  prescribing painkillers like they are aspirin not to mention all the other drugs that we don't need. 

I remember when my girls were younger and the drug companies had cane out with the shot for "ovarian cancer"  I refuse to let my girls get that shot because they are not guinea pigs for the government.

I told my pediatrician that if the drug had been on the market for longer than 15 or 20 years and I knew that there was no side effects then maybe then I would think about it. Until then I'm not going to give my girls a shot that maybe in three years they might grow another ear from because the FDA was so fast push this through because the drug companies gave them so much money in their pockets, this is the reality so wake up people!!

We need to be our own advocates, we need to know what is going in these medicines that are going in our bodies. Do not blindly follow these doctors because they have letters after their names, you must be your own advocate, you must do your own research, you  need to know what is the drug and how long these drugs have been on the market and what the side effects are. We must look for healthy alternatives, change of lifestyle, more excise, eating better or combined the best of both worlds with Eastern and Western medicine but do not just blindly take what some doctor who is overworked and underpaid seeing a hundred patients a day is handing you.

So today my friends remember, just because they are doctors does not make them God, this is your health, this is your life and you are entitled to know exactly how best to take care of yourself, do not just follow the flock."Be the change you want to see"

 

"And just when the caterpillar thought his life over...he turned into a beautiful butterfly"

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