#cannot take this shit anymore i wont lie <3 i do not feel anything but rage anymore

[wingedbeings]

:) i am just going to start physically attacking people now i think

[bitchynaruto]

what’s one particular fanbase/creator/media that you have grown ridiculously wary about after being involved with it? like stupidly ridiculous? cus... a bitch can’t lie, this looming threat of a game of thrones prequel is taking me back to 2014 when i woke up daily just to lament and shake with anger over both grrm’s writing and his fans. it’s loser behavior i know but for the next couple of years i avoided everything i could about that franchise & i’ve accepted i cannot escape it anymore 🗿

OOOO THIS IS A FUN QUESTION! honestly, game of thrones is a good pick. for me it’d have to be anything created by disney, but specifically under the star wars name. i cannot tell you how enamored and in love with star wars ive been since i was a kid, and literally the sequel trilogy, while i was super excited for in ep. 7, is the worst thing ever. worse than the prequels imo. anything disney has made for star wars is lukewarm at best, disregarding the mandalorian and rogue one and star wars rebels, or just hot shit at best (sequel trilogy, han solo movie). its sad but the content pre disney, while not the most cohesive bc the starwars lucasfilms era of the expanded universe was huge and not always stellar, felt like it was star wars. idk. its sad

on a more general note, f*ndom in general is just something ive become ridiculously wary with as a whole. ao3 is a garbage site, but the site with the most traction. a lot of f*ndom praises white cishet voices over lgbt poc, and you can tell by the works that are popular mostly being racist, abusive, toxic, or downright illegal. i dont casually scroll through ao3—i only read fics that are recommended to me by people i trust because you never know what youre clicking on, even with the supposed ‘warnings’. if there was another website that had such a good formatting for fic while still having morals and boundaries, i would move to that website. altho tbh, once im finished with fuck konoha series, i probably wont be focusing on producing fanfic anymore and just focus on my original works.

also to add on for the general stuff, anything netflix produces i am like.. just not that interested anymore. id rather rewatch completed shows i love than start something new in case i get invested in it and it gets cancelled. video games, as a whole, are something im wary about too because of companys releasing unfinished games with the promise of updates or dlc to fill in the world. ive only played like 3 new games counting from 2019-2021 (animal crossing, star wars: fallen order, the outer worlds—which i still havent finished but havent had time to play) while replaying all my old games i still have saved. hollywood movies feel so dry to me rn bc theyre all the same, like i feel like ive watched these movies before, these characters, etc.

this makes me sound super picky but , like, i am! i only have limited amounts of time when not at school, work, or doing household chores/responsibilities and its like.. theres just not a lot of good media rn that im seeing that catches my attention the way it used to like 3-5 years ago. idk if its adhd, the stress of the pandemic, therapy teaching me not to distract myself with engorging on media, or the fact im getting older or what but like.... theres just not a lot of stuff out rn that im willing to put in my time for and its kind of a bummer

[spearxwind]

OOF... i dont even have a theme for the major extinction characters sjlklfdhk. i dont.. i dont have most minor characters planned out even 

I WILL GIVE YOU HOWEVER, a song that’s been inspiring me for certain worldbuilding things (though i cant say much bc idk if itll end up showing in the story at all but you can have it!) 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XciV8HuNQLw  [it’s realm breaker, by mechina]

Oh man, im influenced by a bunch of art and comics but i couldnt pin down specific inspirations for those haha

as for the more broad sense, i also have a bunch of things! significantly, physics and space. it might not look like it but i think a lot about the logistics of things and whatever rules would exist in my universes etc. it does suck sometimes bc it prevents me from doing things just for the hell of it, but i love applying knowledge to things. and space has always been something really close to me, my dad’s an astrophysicist so ive been exposed to all sorts of cool knowledge about it since i was a wee bab 

i also really really love metaphors and symbolism, but rather than take inspiration from things i just use my own personal symbolism x) i put a lot of myself in what i do. which.. i guess could be said for many artists too so its not too special haha

and also as with many other artists, i AM fueled by spite significantly. specifically 1. for the people who once thought or who still think id never be good to do art, or that id never get better at what i do. 2. for people who draw wings wrong (especially professional people? what’s wrong with you. im begging you to look at a bird) 3. for people and companies that make terrible designs with terrible decisions (they fuel me to do better than them) 4. for people who believe that the only way to be good at art and design is to make overly complex and visually charged, detailed designs with many colors/hues (all my ocs are fairly simple and have the most limited colors kffhk) 

im sure there’s a lot more but ive spent a lot of time writing this out already and i cant really think of anything else so i hope this is a good enough answer!! 

god i do NOT have enough knowledge for this but what the fuck was up with the volturi lol. like fuckin, vampire goth club over there did nothing to change over hundreds of years, all of them still stuck in their medieval ways. i remember a plot point that was touched upon was that they had a specific person lure in a bunch of lost tourists through the sewer entrance so that the volturi could drink them and like ?? bro. how is this not investigated at any point, ever. like a shit ton of tourists just disappear ??? all the time?? and no one gives a fuck?? no investigation?? what do they do with the bodies?????

also, they were willing to blast the carlisle family into fucking orbit over Turning A Child (tm) into a vampire, but they had absolutely no qualms about vampire wars/soldiers where a lot of people were irresponsibly turned into neophytes for their strength (like jasper) or people who turned others just for the fuck of it or bc theyd have sickass powers (like benjamin. that was the sole reason for benjamin being turned. bc the dude could feel that benj would have cool powers and he absolutely did... he was a fucking avatar. controller of the elements. and he did absolutely jack shit in the books. im still so mad) 

but yeah anyway the volturi are big hypocrites. got nothing to say about their lifestyle and aesthetic tho bc italians just be like that

his horns and the spikes on his forearms and tail are rly solid and rly pointy so theyre about as dangerous as a solid, pointy big thing can be

the spikes on his neck and back are a lot softer though. theyre flat scales and are probably bendy, but still sturdy. they don’t have edges or anything so you wont be sliced up if you touch them but touching them is probably not too comfortable

alex would probably be a crocodile tbh! it’s one of the things i based his dragon form off of for the latest iteration, and i just think it fits him a lot (also its funny that crocodiles are water creatures but alex has a Big Dislike of water)

also i literally cannot see adri as anything other than a snake sklhfsdk. its what he is!! this is like asking someone’s favorite color but not letting them choose their actual favorite. do you want me to lie? do you want me to say something not true??

Honestly i always loved deer but refused to acknowledge it, especially to myself, and much less thought about having one as a sona bc “prey animals are lame” was rly prevalent in my circles for the longest time. everyone was a dragon or a wolf etc bc they wanted to be cool and so did i but i never vibed with it it took me a rly long time to just accept that i rly liked deer haha and i think what made me decide on it in the end was ‘well i can make a deer more monstery if i wanted to, i have that power’ and so i did  then later i tied the whole ‘wrong deer’ aesthetic to my own personal symbolism of always being picked on by many until i got sick of it and learned to stand up for myself. my sona is something that’s not for people to prey on anymore, and so am i c:

honestly? ive never thought about it. im not too knowledgeable about dnd still so i dont think id be able to do them justice

ive thought about making dnd encounters based off of my ocs thought (like, how their powers would work turn/mechanic wise) but if i ever did i dont think id use them or talk about them :’) 

jkdg gosh thats so sweet thank you sm!! im so happy you enjoy my stuff :’DDDD 

WELL, in no particular order: 

1. several glass bottles 2. bei’s pet golem sierra (they got her back though) 3. a knife or two probably 4. an air conditioning remote 5. do sewer rats count? sewer rats. besides all the other rats i mean 6. homeless man who tried to rob his store at gunpoint 7. the gun  8. drank a bottle of cyanide once 9. a motorcycle (as collateral damage) 10. tbh he will eat any creature he finds while walking around that’s small enough to fit in his mouth and no one can rly stop him

DISGOSTING!!! not even bc of the flavor i rly dont care abt that but bc like... warm pineapple... that’s the real crime 

oh my gosh that’d be an honor tbh!! I’m not sure if i’d be a big help since i might be tied with school stuff at the time, but id definitely love to try!! ty!! 

[cow3survivor]

Ep. 9: “Break Down Everything I’ve Built” - Jennet

JENNET

not to be rude but i hate this cast.... me winning immunity didnt even matter bc my bestie got booted tf...

(a little later)

feeling alone, im not even on a tribe anymore. im alone now not furcifer calumma or brookesia, just jennet

(after eating rice)

i know i sound dramatic asf but ffft i was so uneasy starting this game and i didnt feel comfortable or didnt feel excited to play until i started playing with ethan so i guess i relied too much on him but its like... now what?? where do i go from here? like sam, sammy, jones, and mikey voted to keep him so its like... here i am with low numbers again

(after taking a dip in the ocean)

immunity doesnt feel so good when ur number one ally gets sent home...

(after polishing the immunity necklace)

realizing that tonight ive been on the wrong side of both of votes so now im... reevaluating my position in this game. i have to break down everything ive built and start over and see who i can really trust right now

JONES

https://youtu.be/GY0DufoCyLE (after live night)

LOVELIS

So today's been way more eventful! I've had a great conversation with Jennet finally & got caught up on all the live night stuff, thought it was just a live competition that I wasn't able to attend but then I woke up to Ethan being gone LMAO but oh well! I've been targeted the past two rounds but I'm still here so I've just gotta work my options as best I can, and right now I do wanna with with Jessica the most. Apparently Shane put in a lot of work to keep me during live night & I'm thankful but earlier when I tried to talk to him he wouldn't divert from that point & it was a little awkward.. like idk what you want me to do about that... so today's mostly been catching up with the people who I haven't heard much from like Jake, Lindsay etc and seeing where their heads are at, I need to be more involved in something big if I'm gonna be seen as a potential winner should I make it to the end so I'm definitely not shy of jumping ship from Sharon and tryna make something better for myself with the people that voted for me hehe.. 😳😈

JENNET

looking at the memory wall and im feeling very: vulnerable

LINDSAY

12/19 - https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Q_KxHilwOebD8G3D8JAZsOMKdgsxFp-b/view?usp=sharing

JESSICA

I know in my last confessional I said I was close with Ethan. After I wrote that, I realized that he was a lot closer with other people than he was with me. Lindsay accidentally added him to an alliance chat and I expected him to freak out in my DMs (or at the very least ask me about it!) since we're supposed to be such good allies. But he didn't say anything! Shane said that he did get an Ethan freakout so I was like hmm... noted. Ethan likes Shane more than me so I am okay to vote him out a lot earlier than I was planning. Ethan also left out a LOT of information about the idols when we talked about them so I instantly knew at merge that he was hiding things from me. When we did that round robin conversation thing, I got Shane early on (I think he was the third person I talked to?) and he pitched voting Ethan which made a lot of sense to me. Plus I was a little worried Ethan could have had the Furcifer idol since he found that Brookesia one so fast. I figured if we were going to make a big move, that was the time to do it because if anyone was suspicious I could just pretend the whirlwind nature of the round was the reason they didn't know what happened. Speaking of idols!!! I'm 95% sure that Furcifer idol is in Sam's pocket. Shane had a vote extort power which he could play on anyone; it would force them to either reveal their entire voting history to this mysterious person OR they would have to give up their vote and sit out of immunity. I guess the vote part isn't public but the immunity part was and for some reason, Sam chose to not reveal his voting history. To Shane and Daisy, who don't know how the idols worked, this is a weird choice. But to me there's only one reason someone doesn't want their voting history revealed and it's because they didn't vote at a tribal which means they have an idol. Shane originally wanted to play the power on Mikey which I strongly did not want because 1) I already know how Mikey has voted and 2) I was pretty sure Mikey didn't have an idol so it's unlikely there was a tribal he didn't vote in and 3) If Mikey asked me about it, I didn't want to lie but I also didn't want to expose Shane. The question is.... does Sam's idol still work? If I had found the idol when I knew there was an easy boot on my team (he has to have found it before Pennino left), then I would have gambled as long as I could have to get the idol to work. My guess is Sam's idol goes until... f7? Maybe f6 or f5. Pennino probably left 3-1, not 4-1, but Sam's missing vote didn't matter because it was unanimous and wasn't read. For this round, right now everyone is probably voting Lovelis. It's the easy vote because he isn't here but personally I don't want to do that. Everyone says Lovelis is inactive but he isn't inactive to me and as far as I know, he is not going to flip on me and thinks I've been looking out for him. Which I have been! Also Lovelis cannot have an idol unless he somehow got the merge one. So to me it's like.... why not take out someone like Sam who (probably) has an idol? Or at least get him paranoid enough so he plays it. He seems like the kind of player who could easily stab me in the back so I'd like to get him before he gets me. Right now my tightest alliance is with Shane/Daisy, though I definitely talk about the game with Shane the most. However I also have good relationships with Lovelis, Sammy, and Mikey. I think Jennet and I are getting along well because as far as I know, I was the first one who told them Ethan's name was going around last time when everyone else seemed too afraid to tell them. They were not into that plan at all but I'm glad that I was honest with them because I don't want that to be a closed relationship at all! They also don’t seem to have a tonne of connections so they’re someone I'd like to keep close. And then Jones/Lindsay/Jake are people who I'm still getting to know but I do trust them.... a bit. I don't see that alliance of 6 lasting long term however I don't mind trying to stick with it to get Sam out before it disintegrates. I also think Shane is coming across as a threat which is great to me. I hope people don't think we're close because I really want to keep that relationship hidden. My entire game is about having everyone think they're my #1 (or at least my #2 or #3) so that they are less likely to leak things I tell them, less likely to vote for me, and more likely to look out for me. Information is power so I try to be in a position where I'll get as much of it as I can. So far it is working! I think. This is truly an essay

(a little later)

Oh also I never get episode titles in games so here are some: "Any way you slice it, it's Survivor madness!" "What a night, what a vote" "Please don't invite me to your messy party" "Social game is on 0!" "Survivor brings out the worst in you" "I'm a chameleon" Some of those are things other people said in other games but... oh well!

JENNET

apparently lovelis is rallying the troops to get them to vote for me bc i voted him out over madison... babe we NEVER spoke, and i spoke to madison ALOT why would i not vote u ? tf... its getting weird

JESSICA

LMAO IGNORE THAT LAST CONFESSIONAL That is not how the advantage works at ALL I now totally understand why Sam rejected it That’s so funny that we really read it that wrong.............. I love reading and comprehending the words that I read Still don’t know where that last idol is but this is so funny.

JENNET

so right now the only people i can trust are sammy, sam, jones, and mikey. i want to trust jake but hes in an alliance with jones, lindsay, daisy, shane, and jessica that he didnt tell me about. jones is playing double agent right now and the only reason i dont find that sketch is bc she told us info that she didnt need to. i will say me and jake had a convo about how we dont trust how shady lindsay has been and we wont target her until most of the og brookesia members are gone. im very scared right now but also very angry

(a little later)

had plans for this vote but sam got his vote taken away. im waiting to see what pops off at tribal/ the few hours before tribal before i can try to get the little band of misfits to settle on who to target first. so far its daisy and shane, i’ll try to sneak lindsay in but honestly i want daisy gone first bc shes hosted me and seen how i play and thats too much of an advantage. she’s dangerous to me and my game

JAKE

https://youtu.be/nZPMXTthz9Q yes I'm becoming paranoid and what?? say it to her face

JENNET

my dream boot order after this round (if lovelis is who goes): daisy shane jessica lindsay and then everything else can fold around itself but ideally jake is next to go

LINDSAY

videos r still uploading but here's my quick tea for this episode: feels way too easy to vote lovelis, keep expecting things to blwo up bc lovelis is throwing jennet's name out there. game way too quiet. shit aint right but i aint know whats wrong. i may be paranoid

JENNET

:ETHAN: ❤️ :JENNET: hours

SAMMY

so I feel like so much happened in this round? let's recap the live night and dive into our thoughts and feelings about where we are right now. So starting off after Madison is voted out, the plan throughout the day was to just vote out whoever stayed out of Madison/Lovelis, right? Okay so I go into this live event thinking that's the plan...not sweating...just chilling right? right okay so I get to talking to people and then I get in a chat with daisy who is my 3rd phone call? Then I hear of this plan to get rid of Ethan?? In my head I was like...blinks...okay so why are we doing this like what is the point y'all are being too complicated. So fast forward Ethan goes home. Then Jones lets me know there was a separate group made before tribal of Jake/Shane/Jones/Jess/Lindsay. Apparently all the people who voted Ethan? This actually pisses me off not gonna lie because I opened the door for a conversation hinting that I knew of a group to daisy/jess/Jake and none of them spilled to me. So I caught them in a lie and it lets me know that they are serious about that group of people and that alliance means something. I thought I was close to daisy and I thought she considered me her #1 ally but the info I have been getting really makes me trust her less. She was working on the idol/bridge with like so many other players which makes sense to how she was able to find so many powers. I feel used. She is close to Shane and it is obvious. I also 100% feel as if the Ethan plan was made before tribal or at least mentioned as an idea. I don't like the vibes I am getting from them and something has to change soon or I am gonna be finding myself in a rough patch. I told Jones about Daisy's powers to let Jones know that Daisy pretty much lied to Daisy about the street car ladies (sorry daisy I still love u but in the moment I felt used because I know ur bridge group is on like the late 30s and you didn't tell me). Daisy is playing the middle and I need to separate myself from her or at least break her and Shane up. She is using Shane as a shield. Also I was added to the justice league alliance and its so cute (Jones, Jennet, Mikey, Me, Sam) I love this group but I will say Sam is my weakest connection and I don't really have much trust in him? Hoping that will change in these upcoming rounds tho. Also, I told Jones about my vote block that lasts until final 5 which we could use to our advantage later in the game. I will be holding onto that as long as possible. The last major update other than me feeling somewhat left out of this "group" would be that Jess asked if I would be down to make a group after the vote of her/Jake/me/mikey which I would actually very much enjoy. Okay that is my longest confessional yet. I hope you enjoy. As of right now my top two allies are Jones/Mikey....Lowest on my trust rankings are Shane and Lindsay.

JENNET

lovelis dming me saying we should get out mikey pfftttt

DAISY

https://youtu.be/mz2Fg_Kvyqo

SAM

https://youtu.be/J81hUWIy6dg

SHANE

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1-dymdy5vjtHdwsY3JSTnovwaSRLvuzQt

JESSICA

me: lovelis will be a jury vote for me! me: nvm!!!! Not sure why being rude to people and attacking them is your strategy on the way out... but you do you!

LOVELIS

I think I mentioned chaos in my previous confessional and I think I just did that so you know what.. I'm content LMAO. I pulled out pretty much all the cards I had left to play this round and if it wasn't enough despite being carried the past two tribals.. then so be it. This has been such a fun past couple days and it's fun to just let loose and see what happens!

[s3venpounds]

1-104

YA CHEEKY LITTLE CUNT love you tho because its always fun to do these asks even though everyone who reads will probs forget all these details in like the span of a week.

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say?

wanna go again?

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed?

nothing anymore

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care?

depends on what drugs, the severity of the side effects, the cost of said drugs, and how addicted they are to it. like if its weed sure go ahead long as it isn’t around me not a big fan of the smell. crystal meth however i would probably be turned off or just attempt to get them off it. over the counter drugs though is fine too.

4. Is your last name longer than six letters? yep

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober? sober

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up? AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA yes. horribly messed up. still think about it tbh

7. What does your last received text say? “ well i think you can just wax with whatever length but it wont be able to cling to your hair well”

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed? lost count too busy being happy at the time

9. Where was your last kiss at? a bus stop

10. When is the last time you saw your sister? yesterday

11. What do you drink in the morning? nothing. i dont wake up in the morning

12. Where did you sleep last night? my couch because its fucking comfier than my bed

13. Do you think relationships are hard? most def. wouldn’t have it any other way though. 

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you? yeah

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems?

yeah, the fact we haven’t talked in months, and because i’m pretty sure she wants nothing to do with me lol

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy? rainy, free shower

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you? dont got a middle name so i guess yes?

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants? boxing shorts 

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now? ahahaha no.

20. Does anyone like you? trust me, if i knew i would do something about it

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S? its rude to say but i don’t remember but from what i do remember its a no

22. Is the last person you kissed gay? not gay specifically at least from what i’ve been told by said person

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand? 3 people specifically. not gonna name them

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo? multiple times, talked to tattoo artists, people who had multiple tattoos, people who are first timers so yeah i want one maybe 5

25. In the past week have you cried? yeah anime hurts the feels bro

26. What breed was the last dog you saw?does pictures on tumblr count? if yes, a shiba inu, if no, golden retriever

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower? out of the shower, i feel like im gonna slip and fall if i stay in there too long

28. Have you ever kissed a football player? yeah he doesn’t use lip balm often so it was kinda rough

29. Do you think you’re old? yeah

30. Do you like text messaging? most def. i like texting more than talking since i can think about my words and play it off as just “ yeah i was busy” also i find myself a better conversationalist on texts than in person

31. What type of day are you having? a shitty one but i showered so im feeling refreshed at least

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced? nope, i have thought about getting spider bites on my lower lip but i dont think i can pull it off

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather? cold weather, i hate bugs and indoor volleyball is nice

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you?yeah

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling? a relationship. flings hurt afterwards and to me theres no feelings behind it so youre left feeling empty

36. Are you a simple or complicated person? i wanna say simple but everyone knows everyones complicated. if someones simple that just means theyre not letting off everything at the get go

37. What song are you listening to? lie to me george nozuka

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it? of course i do. does it mean i wont make the same mistake? nope. it just means i’ll take steps to preventing it from happening again. if it happens again then ill keep trying. all you can do when you fuck up is to just keep trying to prevent it from happening again. 39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you? i’d like to think so40. What made you start liking the person you like now?vibrant personality that draws you in. playful demeanor. likes geeky things like i do. has deep thoughts that make me want to ponder existence with them. likes physical intimacy. and the first thought when i saw her was that i wanted to protect her, care for her, and guide her in life if ever she needs help. 41. When did you last receive a text message? 8:43 am monday42. What is wrong with you right now? im not independent? i rely on friends and other stuff to grant me happiness when really the only source of happiness i can rely on if to draw it from myself. friends help but they can’t be the only source. i have trouble moving on from past issues, constantly weighed down by past decisions and mistakes when i should have passed it a long time ago.43. How well do you know the last female you texted? not very well however she knows me very well since i vent to her lol44. Does anyone disgust you? yeah the same 3 people i mentioned that i cannot stand.45. Would you date someone right now if they asked? most likely yeah46. Are you in a good mood right now? nope. neutral if anything47. Who was the last person you talked to in person?me mother before she left for a bus shuttle to fort mac48. What color shirt are you wearing? nude. no plans today, or guests so that means no pants, no shirt and occasionally if im feeling happy enough, no underwear either49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear? not recently. i have a feeling that i’ve given off the vibe to all my friends that they have to tip toe around me about a lot of topics else they’ll make me sad. i’d rather a splash of cold water in the face than some shitty lie50. Anyone you’re giving up on? myself mostly.51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for? i never hate the people i used to date. i hate the decisions i made that lead to breaking up. i tend to think things are never someone else’s fault but more of mine. even if by some weird chance it wasn’t i would twist it so it was my fault. its just easier for everyone that way if people have a scapegoat.

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t? yeah.53. Do you like rain? i love it. sometimes on rare occasions i can almost feel the shitty person inside me just kinda slide off my skin and drip off the tips of my fingers and i feel … complete? is the best way i can put it54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks? nope. party all you like, im just not too keen on drinking very often or partying very often. although when i do party ill party hard.55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them? who hasnt?56. Do you like to cuddle? love it. spooning, arm on shoulder, hugging from behind, them sitting on your lap, them holding you from behind. my skin feels electric when the person i love has their skin against mine.57. Are you shy? i’d like to say im not58. Do you get along with girls? i’d like to say i do59. Have you dated the person you texted last? not going to lie hahah i considered it at some point60. What do you carry with you at all times? phone, wallet , keys.61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you? yeah most likely. the economy sucks bro.62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months? yeah assuming i dont fuck up lol63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship?nope. sadly.64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute? DAMN STRAIGHT.  shit would be like a good luck charm65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week? my niece tried to say duck and instead said fuck

66. How old are the last three people you kissed? probably going to get some questionable looks from this but 16, 24, 21

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself? pay for a pro, i am NOT an artistic person.   68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print?    zebra. black and white. leopard print makes me think a white 40 something year old with plastic surgery, hair thats half a meter tall and nails that are longer than most men’s penises talking with a southern belle accent that tries to hit on pool boys69. Do you have any stickers on your car? none70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne? i hate country and im not a fan of lil wayne anymore so i guess lil wayne if i absolutely have to.71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone?    android 72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut?    couple days ago?73. Do you like diet soda?    hate it. feels fake to me74. What color are the walls in your room?    boring beige75. Are you 16 or older?    yes.76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars?    heard of it, seen gifs, dont plan on watching it77. Do you have a job?    as of now yeah.  78. What are your initials?    SM79. Did you ever have braces?  nope.  i had retainers but i kept breaking them so my parents were like okay thats enough, its too expensive to replace them lol80. Are you from the south?  im about as north as you can get without living in igloos

81. What does your last status on facebook say?    “day barely started and 4 things putting me in a shitty mood. looks liek today is gonna be loooooooooong”82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed?    i wish.83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad?    mother. although im not on good terms with either of them. my mother just has more patience to deal with me84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics?   i did pom squad which was a pretty shitty version of cheerleading i guess. 85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters? beauty and the beast i thoroughly enjoyed it =]    86. Do you smoke?  weed or cigarettes? either one ive stopped both. not worth it, plus i dislike smelling gross.87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops?    i’ve worn heels before but not for a prolonged period of time but they felt nice so i’d say hells. flip flops keep making annoying sounds and it makes me grind my teeth thinking about it88. Is your phone touch screen?    yes89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly?    straight. i’d love it to be a bit curly. i even permed my hair last year apparently it looked good says some friends of mine.90. Have you ever snuck out of your house?    i snuck out last night lol. the family gave up on stopping me.91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool?    pool. rivers and lakes have the possibility of germs, leeches or other shit. its a hassle to have to take extra precautions92. Have you ever made out in a car?    yep.93. …Had sex in a car?    almost.94. Are you single or in a relationship?   single. 95. What were you doing last night at midnight?    playing overwatch with my friend reo.96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks?    AW COME THE FUCK ON. the last relationship questions weren’t enough to jab a knife in my chest but this too? fuck. whatever. it was at capital ex or k- days whatever the fuck you wanna call it. i had fun. the fireworks wasn’t the only thing that sparked. fuck. instant bad mood.97. Do you like the camera on your phone? yeah its really good. i can take pictures of my friends and even see the condition of their pores and shit its pretty nice.   98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits?    nope. i’d like to try it though99. Have you ever passed out from drinking?    not yet.100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate?  yeah. i should really just delete my facebook.  101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare?  nope.  102. Name your favorite Kesha song:    Die young103. Do you have any tan lines right now?    nope.104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts? sure why not. i’d probs wear assless chaps too if i had a nice ass

[survivor-iceland]

Ep. 11 - “Just because I am loud does not mean I am good at this game.” - Raffy

Raffy

I cannot believe that plan worked out. We got out Stephen, weakening Maynor's hold on this game which means that if he doesn't win this next immunity challenge then he's screwed. However, this next one is a doozy and I don't know if I can win this, but I am going to try my best. I just hope people credit me with this move since I managed to make the right social connections to do it. Timmy is big mad, but I think that is more towards Joseph than anything else. Either way, I am proud of myself for doing THAT. Nothing in my Survivor career will ever top this moment.

Jack

So the plan worked, Stephen got voted out (love you man) and thank fuckkkk because I got 3 votes. Joseph went for Timmy and that made Timmy mad at Joseph and I'm like *very innocently whistling* This challenge now o boyyyyy, hopefully maybe i can win maybe? Also i really like Timmy and Dylan but also Timmy is gonna kill me and i know it. He was so mad in the moment mannnn. 

Timmy

I am absolutely, positively livid. I’m thankful that it wasn’t me, but my god there are a lot of fake bitches here. Number 1 on that list is Raffy who was preaching about how they’re alone and there is no need to lie to them but then goes lying on all day. BITCH I WAS HONEST WITH YOU! I THOUGHT WE GOT THROUGH THAT SHIT! I guess fucking not though. I wanted an easy vote after the mess that was the last two but nope. And I get the irony here, trust me it’s not lost. I did it to them and this is karma and she’s really that bitch. But really, I’m just glad I still have my idol because I was real close to panic playing it. Number 2 is Joseph because he had the audacity to vote for me because the people who have been TARGETING HIM say that they have the numbers. And guess what, THEY LIED TO HIM. Literally a dumbass who will never win because they don’t understand any concepts of the game. Dylan is a huge threat right now because they are making moves and not staying true to alliances but being calculated about it. Dylan is riding the middle which right now seems like a good spot. I feel like it will put them in the target position that I had been in though, which could work for me. But I will not let Raffy skate by because he has people in jury who will vote for him. And raffy needs to go fast if there is another returning player just because it might be Zoe or John.

Dylan C

https://youtu.be/KkInofcSWYc

Maynor

Well. Back to the minority thanks to Joseph. Who honestly screwed over people who wanted to work with him till the end so he could help people who have said they wanted him out for forever. 🤷‍♂️ Im just whatever. Like if i dont win immunity, im most likely going home. And Joseph gets a free pass to f5 cuz the two next votes will be me and Timmy.

This challenge is just a huge ugh for me. I dont know why but everytime i have done this challenge, it always triggers a panic attack. Its a small one but affects my ability to do it when i mess up for the first time. I got to 29 sleds. Most likely not going to be enough to beat Jack or Raffy. Which sucks cuz i really needed this immunity.

Maynor

Hmm. I think i wont be able to pass my 29 sled score. Especially not in the state i am. The pressure i put on myself wasnt good. And has made me into a mess. I just feel bad. And i feel like i let Timmy down even though he has told me I didnt. For the challenge, i feel like Raffy or Jack will win. And Timmy n I will be the targets. No one in their right mind would vote off Joseph. He’s the goat people would take to the end to get zero votes. He really screwed his alliance for people who dont want to work with him. Im still going to fight but not going to fool myself its going to be tougher and gunna need lots of luck.

Raffy

This challenge broke me. I got up to mid-70s and then I fucked it up. And apparently someone was neck and neck with me. It was probably Timmy, and he is going to win immunity then use the idol on Maynor which is terrible. I fully think there is an idol in this game and it can only be used in these next two rounds so it is bound to happen. And I am just so tired and so done and so over it. I can't do it anymore. And I'm going to go to EoE and then have to battle against challenge powerhouses and I fgjkbf j, fsjfKD dkHV dhb KB If this is the challenge that causes my game to be over, I'm going to be pissed

Jack

So i somehow actually one the challenge (i legit thought I wasn't doing that well and then Jay's like "mate you're super ahead lmao") but I'm VERY glad i did, cause no way I didn't still have a target on my back. Now the likely shift will be onto Raffy, but we've got the stirrings of a plan to go for Timmy (love the guy, he just seems like he wants to murder me so) and go with the same voting block of Ellie, Raffy, Dylan and me, and then Joseph would maybe not be told the vote (sorry dude) and instead told that the votes smthn else, so in case Timmy has an idol he wont use it (but also like only 2 more councils to use it so like he might just anyways) but yeah. Also maybe spreading that were going to vote for Joseph actually tho, but idk. Gonna chat with Dylan and Ellie in the morning.

Raffy

I was so close to winning that challenge. I do not feel safe going into this round because I think that someone has an idol up their sleeve and they are bound to use it either during this round or the next. I want to split the vote between Maynor and Timmy, but last time I tried to organize a split vote, one of my closest allies went home. Ideally, we have me, Jack, and Dylan vote for Maynor while Ellie/Joseph vote for Timmy. However, Joseph probably feels betrayed after last round so he will probably join Timmy's and Maynor's side. I think we all need to stack our votes on one person for the best success, but I'm so scared of an idol rn that it is crazy. Idol paranoia is at an all-time high. 

Raffy

I do not know why I am a front runner in this game when people like Dylan, Jack, and Ellie exist who are the ones doing the actual work. In fact, I should not even be a target. Just because I am loud does not mean I am good at this game. Either way, at least it means I have a good chance of victory if I make it to FTC, but that is a hard IF. 

Ellie and Dylan were talking, and they determined that a split vote, while risky, is probably necessary. Our main target right now is Maynor, but we are splitting it between him and Timmy. We want to keep Joseph in the dark about who the target is because I don't necessarily trust him with that information. So, we are going to tell him that it is Timmy, but three of us are going to vote for Maynor while another one votes for Timmy. This creates a 3-2-2 if Joseph goes along with the plan. And, if he back stabs us, it creates' a 3-3-1 with a tie for insurance. This is in case of an idol because if Joseph back stabs us then that means they will think it is Timmy which means, if they have an idol, they will use it on Timmy, not Maynor. This plan has its risk, but sometimes you have to take risks in this game like last time. 

Raffy

Maynor asked me to vote him out. This is strange because his reasoning is that he feels like he screwed over Timmy's game and he wants to give Timmy more chances in this game than himself. I find this incredibly suspicious because this could very well be a ploy to use the idol correctly in order to idol someone out, probably me. If this were a trick, it's a dirty trick that I cannot respect. I would like to believe him and make this an easy tribal, but this is just odd from my standpoint. 

Jack

Okay so plan rn is voting 3 (Joseph, Ellie, Raffy) onto Maynor and 2 (Me, Dylan) onto Timmy, in case one had an idol. No hard feelings for either just how it goes. I'm so freaking glad i've got immunity tonight mannnn. Also I've still got my idol so that's a thing. I'm pretty confident tonight be who knows man, Joseph's a bit of a wild card and Dylan could flip. Also love Maynor but hes gonna do a win mannnn.

Raffy

I told Joseph about the split vote because I do not believe lying is necessary anymore. Maynor knows he is going home, so he is going to use an idol on himself either way. And Joseph seemed down as long as he got to vote Maynor. This could end up blowing up in my face, but this will come back to haunt these people in the form of my bitterness.

Maynor

This tribal is gunna be extremely messy and i love it cuz there is a chance that me and Timmy can stay in the game. I knew that Dylan Effie Raffy and Jack are splitting votes. Also have asked Joseph to join them. So they wanna split 3-2 with me going home. Kinda my doing cuz told Raffy to vote for me. But Joseph is gunna vote with Me and Timmy and vote Dylan. So the vote should be 3-3-1 unless they have Joseph in the majority vote if they do then the vote would end up being 3-2-2 amd Dylan goes home. Timmy says hes gunna play his idol but doesnt know on who yet. We are assuming right now that im getting the majority. So hoping so we can pull of this amazing blindside. 3 blindside in the first 4 merge vote. We are some crackheads.

Timmy

This tribal is going to be a mess. Should I play my idol, should I not, I DON'T FUCKING KNOW. And now I have to put my faith in Joseph...THE SAME JOSEPH WHO FUCKED ME OVER LAST ROUND. Like what even is this game. Either way Maynor and I want Dylan gone and everyone else except maybe Joseph wants myself or Maynor gone. If we can get through this without needing to use the idol it'll be a miracle.

Ellie

What the fuck is it with Raffy and last minute decisions???? Stick with the plan dude pretty pleaseeeeeee

Raffy

At least I was not screwed over by the idol. I still have the numbers with Jack and Ellie. So, next round I either need the idol or win immunity. Or both.

[killer-killjoy]

Do every other question for the ask game

OH BOY OK 

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? - my roommate lol 

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? - i dont know tbh5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? - i mean i dont know. id like to say yes bc he seems like such a considerate person, but i’m not too sure. but i wouldn’t ever put him or myself in that situation lmao so idk.

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? - no lmao 

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? - not really. i try not to let it but i get awkward when its like everyones talking about their personal stories i’m like “lol i’m a virgin and everyone knows it and i feel kind of like a loser” 

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? - “hide the children” lmao

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? - absolutely oh my god

15. What good thing happened this summer? - i got to live with one of my bffs so that was really lovely

17. Do you think there is life on other planets? - absolutely

19. Do you like bubble baths? - yeah they’re nice!

21. What are you bad habits? - picking at my nails/the skin around my nails and my lips, or like chewing my lips. ugh. or if i have a sunburn and my skin is peeling i literally have to peel it off bc i can’t control myself haha. i’m gross.

23. Do you have trust issues? - yes & i’m a paranoid bitch 

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? - ugh man i dont even know probably either like my face/chin area where i’ve got a lot of fat or like my stomach

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? - not particularly. never really thought about it too much. i like to be tan in the summer but like i don’t really.

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? - no exes no breakups yeet

31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail? - yep. although i’m debating on cutting it short again. but idk. 

33. Spell your name with your chin. - no thank u i’m really too lazy to move the computer towards my face

35. Would you rather live without TV or music? - without TV

37. What do you say during awkward silences? - NOTHING BC IM AWKWARD AS SHIT AND LITERALLY PROMISE U ALL IM THINKING IS “wow this is so awkward what do i say right now”

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? - forever 21, hot topic, kohls, target

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? - i dont know it really depends on the situation

43. Do you smile at strangers? - depends, typically i just dont really look at anyone lmao

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? - nothing other than the anxiety i start to feel knowing all the trouble i’ll be in if i dont get up and do the things i need to do 

47. Have you ever been high? - negative captain

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? - not that i know of 

51. Ever wished you were someone else? - every goddamn day of my life

53. Favourite makeup brand? - i dont really use anything brand specific like. all of my stuff comes from different brands.

55. Favourite blog? - i dunno

57. Favourite food? - i really like burgers 

59. First thing you ate this morning? - uhh hash browns and some chocolate milk lol

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? - no i’m a good noodle 

63. Ever been in love? - already answered but no 

65. Are you hungry right now? - no im just bored so i want to eat lmao 

67. Facebook or Twitter? - facebook

69. Are you watching tv right now? - nope

71. Craving something? What? - i was craving this giant hersheys bar earlier and i kinda still want it rn 73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? - i used to, not anymore. 

75. Favourite animal? - cats, but birds are a strong contender

77. Chocolate or Vanilla? - chocolate 

79. What colour shirt are you wearing? - grey

81. Favourite tv show? - hmm. i dont know. i’m really into the walking dead. i think that’s my choice. it changes.

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? - mean girls 

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? - i dunno i dont care for the movie enough to have a favorite 

87. First person you talked to today? - my roommate 

89. Name a person you hate? - no i wont drop names 

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? - myself

93. How many sweatpants do you have? - idk like 3 or 4 pairs. 

95. Last movie you watched? - um i truly cannot remember. OH MOANA.

97. Favourite actor? - leonardo dicaprio

99. Have any pets? - cat named Linguini, and a cat named Sasha. even tho sasha lives with my sister she will always be my baby child. 

101. Do you type fast? - speed of light

103. Can you spell well? - yes i love spelling

105. Ever been to a bonfire party? - too fuckin many lmao

107. Have you ever been on a horse? - yeah once or twice 

109. Is something irritating you right now? - yes a lot of things are 

111. Do you have trust issues? - yes didn’t i already answer this question 

113. What was your childhood nickname? - courtis 

115. Do you play the Wii? - to play mario kart ya

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? - no i dont like soup

119. Favourite book? - flowers in the attic is a favorite. also any nancy drew book (like the classic ones yanno carolyn keene yanno the hard cover yellow ones) 

121. Are you mean? - yes i think i’m a mean person i think i can be so mean and i hate me lmao 

123. Can you keep white shoes clean? - um probably not i dont know i dont wear white shoes bc i dont trust my ability to keep em clean lmao 

125. Do you believe in true love? - i want to yes 

127. What makes you happy? - not much lmao but simple things, cats, the sky, books, movies, music, friends

129. What your zodiac sign? - gemini 

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? - i dont have a best friend of the opposite sex bc i legitimately have like 2 friends so i dont know. it depends on the situation. 

133. Favourite lyrics right now? - hmmm all i can think of is “find hope in the hopeless” from james arthur’s ‘train wreck’ 

135. Dumbest lie you ever told? - i dont even know i say so much stupid shit on the daily 

137. How tall are you? - 5″5? maybe? idk

139. Brunette or Blonde? - if you’re asking my preference, then brunette 

141. Night or Day? - hm night 

143. Are you a vegetarian? - noooo mama likes her meat

145. Tea or Coffee? - iced tea

147. Mars or Snickers? - neither 

149. Do you believe in ghosts? - yes spooky boo