#chainsaw man aki hayakawa

[jemas18]

[zeraaachan]

ANGELS CAN'T FALL - CHAINSAW MAN

pairing(s): angel devil x reader

warning(s): angst/no comfort, major character death, ooc! angel devil, manga spoilers

description: there was once a princess who woke up from a true love's kiss. but all his tale can offer is a damsel who slept eternally for a first love's peck. maybe it happened because he was no prince charming. or maybe it happened because he's the angel devil.

he never intended to meet them.

it was purely incidental. similar to a stroke of luck, or misfortune, the devil caught a glimpse of them through the small window in their hospital room. he should've walked away when he still had the chance. should've ignored his curiosity for the pale, sickly hands that fidget anxiously. he should've walked away and never come back when it was painfully obvious that they were ill and that they were no good for them. but alas, the devil in him thirsted for curiosity and interaction. he took a few steps back, peeked at the little window, and ignored aki's call excusing that he'll only be quick.

and that's how the two met: the winged and the damned.

angel devil's entrance caught the room patient's by surprise. no, he didn't do anything special like appear in front of them wings fully spread and halo shining. angel devil entered their room like a normal person, open the door then close it. but somehow they're still too surprised. they bombarded him with questions such as how the hell they made it up when they were supposed to go down. did they somehow trick heaven's list and slipped in their name? did no one up there see how unholy their search history is especially on reading platforms? they asked questions that made zero sense to the tired devil.

“okay, when did i die? did i fall from my bed accidentally when i sneezed?” they asked him, and now he can understand the reason for their surprise. a misconception, at that time. but still a foreshadowing.

“no. you're still alive.” angel devil tiredly muttered, eyes darting on each corner of their room until they landed on a particular spot. “i'm devil first, angel second. you're not exactly going to heaven if i've come to fetch you.”

“hmm makes sense. you look like a twink but you can probably dom me.”

”no, you don't understand.” he said, barely registering their words. his eyes still focused on a certain spot. “say, will you still eat that ice cream?” angel devil finally asked. his eyes still trained on the unopened can of ice cream on the table beside their hospital bed. he now realize why he was so drawn to this room. it's not them. it's the ice cream.

“nope. take it. the doctor said i'm not allowed to eat it”

and he doesn't need to be offered twice to move. with a simple word of excuse, he picked up the clean spoon near the ice cream can and the can itself with a few swift movements. he even took the liberty to sit on the hospital bed uninvited, mindful not to touch its occupant. although they don't seem to mind his presence. they're too fascinated with his wings, he noticed, he just hope they won't touch them. nor him for that matter.

“don't try to touch me. it will shorten your life span.” he warned unemotionally as a spoon of ice cream landed in his mouth. he can't really care whether they touch him. but he warned nonetheless as a gratitude for the ice cream on his hand.

he caught the way they looked at him with those curious eyes that probably never saw the outside of the hospital for weeks. it was full of questions, the devil noted. but they didn't ask anything. they just smiled at him sweetly, brightly. brighter than the fluorescent light above their head or the convenience store lights that attract his eyes to buy soft serve.

”okay. i won't" they finally said. but the angel devil knows better than to trust them. he stared at them for a good minute which they reciprocated. if he didn't turn his head away, he can bet that the patient in front of him will just continue to stare at him without blinking.

well, if they touch him, it's not his fault anymore. he thought.

“so.... do you like ice cream?” angel devil heard them ask. and that was only the beginning.

***

“so what's heaven like?”

angel devil just shoved another spoonful of ice cream into his mouth as they continue to pester him. he can't understand himself. as if one time was not enough, today he still came back to the hospital room. it's probably the ice cream on his hand. it's the only reason why he'll come back to the hospital.

“i don't know. you don't need to know. you're not going there.” he answered rapidly followed by a short 'nom'.

”well that's rude coming from someone eating my ice cream.” angel devil only hugged the ice cream bowl possessively when he sensed the change in tone. then they giggled. only a little bit and it was nothing special. but he can swear that his ice cream is not the only thing that melted a bit faster when that happened.

that small giggle did something to him. it made him stop devouring the ice cream for a moment and stare at them. it's not the first time he saw a human make a joyous sound. but it's the first time he saw it up close. it was the first time someone made that tiny laugh concerning him.

and he would've probably savored the warm feeling if they didn't try to touch him in an attempt to pet his head.

angel took a retreat before they can even touch him. eyes wide with offense and surprise that woke them up from their trance.

instead of being offended by his attitude, they grinned sheepishly.

“oops! i remember.” they chuckled, almost apologetically. “no touchies.”

he warily looked at them. like a chick afraid to be stepped on again or in his case a devil afraid to be touched. but when they held up their hands in the air, grinned, and promised they'll not do it again, he let his guard down and returned to his spot. on their hospital bed. he sat down on the patient's bed, careful not to touch them even their clothed leg as always, and settled comfortably again. it's just him, the ice cream, and them again.

“so what is hell like?” they asked a bit too energetically after a moment.

and the angel doesn't need to think twice about his answer. “it is dark.”

***

“are we close enough for me to ask you a question?” they asked one day. it's the 15th time he came back. or is it the 51st time? but it doesn't matter. their hospital bed mattress still feels the same on his bottom. the ice cream on the side of their bed is still the same flavor and still taste the same, angel can even say that the temperature is the same as always. there're still a few cobwebs in the corner of their room. some flowers. a basket of fruit. and they're still there.

for some reason, they're still in the same hospital, same hospital room, and in the same hospital bed. it's as if they always belonged there and won't be leaving anytime soon. and the angel devil doesn't know if he is comforted or bothered by that fact.

“you bombarded me with questions when we first met.” the angel answered nonchalantly, feeding himself with ice cream and not bothering to share.

”well yes, but that's different.” they elongated the last word almost into a whine. “are we close now for me to ask, you know, questions for close people.”

he merely shrugged.

”eh? is that a yes in your language?” they asked. confused but light-hearted nonetheless. it may just be angel's opinion, but every time he returns, they seem a bit brighter. like today. they have more color than yesterday. even a red on their cheeks. it looks lovely, he admits.

”well i don't know if you said yes or no but just don't answer if we're still not close. because we're open.” they laughed at their own joke. angel questioned their sanity but didn't have the time to do so when they revealed their question. ”why can't i touch you?”

he should've expected this moment. he interacted with the human far more than he expected and can imagine. there will be a sense of kinship, of closeness as they term. they should've expected their curiosity and the question.

but he still doesn't like the fact that he has to say it. he doesn't enjoy the fact that they have to look into their happier eyes and reveal an unhappy fact.

angel finished the last drops of his ice cream before he met his eyes. full of wonders. just like when they first met. just like when he first became drawn to it.

“i'll absorb the little life you have with just a touch.” he muttered. his voice void of emotion but not cold. never cold. ”i don't want to kill you.”

---

”you must be a pretty strong devil, no?”

they initiated the conversation as usual. and like any other visit, he sat on their bed which now also recognizes them as their owner. he can't remember how many times he came back already. he stopped counting when reached 100. but he never stopped eating their ice cream.

“yes.” he answered shortly.

“must be because many are afraid of angels.” they concluded in which he only nodded. “then is there a ‘hot people devil’?”

“a what?”

“a ‘hot people devil’. the type of devil that grows strong from the fear of hot people?”

“i don't know any devil like that. is there even any human who's afraid of that..?”

“how dare you...!” they gasped quite dramatically. the angel devil, who noticed the change in intonation panicked. ”how dare you invalidate my fear!”

“but i—”

“i am deathly afraid of hot people. whenever i look at my mirror i scream out of fear!”

angel's panic was short-lived when he finally realized their point. he sighed, disappointed, and picked up the spoon they dropped earlier. so much for being concerned about a human's feeling. ”funny.” he muttered, not an ounce of joy in his voice.

they just laughed and resisted the urge to slap his back. it was a habit that he noticed. they always want to slap something whenever they laugh. angel doesn't know if he's more afraid of them accidentally touching him due to this habit or if he's more afraid of being slapped. he decided to eat soft serve ice cream instead.

after their laughter died down, they wiped the corner of their eye and angel is once again ready for another antic of theirs. except now, it's different.

”is there a love devil?” they asked, their tone a bit too serious for a joke. ”many people are afraid of love and being in love. many are afraid of losing their loved ones. is there a love devil, enjeru?”

it's the first time they called him, he noted. ”i'm not sure.” he answered which is rewarded by a smile.

“well it doesn't matter. because i, for one, isn't afraid of love.” they vowed confidently. a voice full of pride and certainty. and maybe because of their goofy tone, the devil was caught off guard by their next words. “but you, angel devil, must not make the love devil stronger.”

he wants to say something. anything. he's sensing the conversation going to a path he doesn't mean to take. he never meant to step in that territory.

but he can't stop them. he can't stop the next words that came out from them. especially when they look at him with a gaze full of conviction and sincerity.

“don't be afraid to fall in love with me, enjeru.” they answered sincerely. “because i don't plan on making a love devil stronger.

i love you.”

that's when the angel devil realized that he entered the path of no return.

---

“why do you always have an ice cream when you can't even eat it?”

today is different. he'll be the one starting the conversation instead. the angel devil, for once, is starting the conversation between the winged and the damned. and he must admit, he's pretty horrible at it. but at least he didn't start with ‘how's the weather?’

“hmm... maybe because i expected a winged devil to enter my humble hospital room one day?” they answered cheekily, finger on their chin as they fake to think. ”what do you call it again? fate?”

angel devil merely stared at them and completely forgot about the conversation that strayed to a different direction. for the numerous times he visited, there are many moments where he'll just stare at them absentmindedly as they seem to sparkle whenever they talk. it's amazing honestly. especially as how it sometimes feels that he's viewing them on a glitter and sparkle filter. and maybe due to that particular filter, it made them ache to touch them.

”sometimes i wonder if i'll feel something when we touch.” angel murmured in his drunk state. unaware of his words until it finally hit him. of all the foolish things he can say, he picked the one that top it all. ”ignore it. i don't mean it—”

“then why don't we?”

if the angel devil was still capable of rage, he would've surely felt it. it angers him, just the thought of it, that they'll even think about something so foolish when they know the heavy weight of it. he's quite the hypocrite when he thinks this way, but he knows better.

“i'd rather stare at you every day than touch you once and never have that every day again.” he confessed. eyes more tired than usual.

that day, the ice cream on their bedside was left half-eaten.

---

it was quiet in the patient's room after that conversation. there was no sign of huge white wings in the small space of the hospital room. the ice cream tub remained on the table, untouched until it melted. but it doesn't matter. it will always be replaced tomorrow. but like the day before, no one came to eat it.

the room returned to being a lonely typical hospital room. with one lone occupant. alone, sick, and always staring out the window on their door.

until that door swung open.

and revealed a doctor in a white coat.

---

“you didn't come back for two weeks. i was obliged to dispose of 14 ice creams.”

“sorry.”

it was funny how it was the first thing the angel devil said when they met again after weeks of not seeing each other. it's not that they're not busy. they were. but despite that they always find the time to visit them before and claim dibs on the ice cream that is always on the table beside their bed. he just took his sweet time gathering his thoughts this time. and it was a mess.

”i made some thinking.” he confessed, eyes on them. ”they're about you.”

”i'll be jealous if they're not.”

angel ignored their small quip. ”i realized i'm happy with just eating that ice cream over there.” he stated and looked at their table. even pointed the single tub of ice cream.

it was pretty horrible of him to bring up ice cream when the mood is not really one for eating. but he can only hope that he knows what he is doing. he can only hope that they know what he is doing.

the devil was not sure if he conveyed himself properly. if he conveyed his thoughts properly. he's not sure if they understood that they're putting a wall between them but at the same time letting them enter his untouchable life. he's not sure if they understood that he's telling them that he wants what they want, that they want them the same, but there are limits.

he wants to know if they understand that it would've worked if only he was not him. if he's not the angel devil.

but surely they understood. for they offered him that gracious smile once more and gestured the tin near the bed. “oh hush. just eat this stuff.” they commanded in a jovial tone. ”i know you only come back for this.”

---

maybe he was too happy that he forgot a little bit of everything. maybe the angel was on clouds that he forgot many circumstances. he forgot his own demons. their demons. he was too relaxed, happy and satisfied, that he forgot some circumstances. and how he wish he didn't.

“do you wanna beat the system?” they lightly joked and looked up to him with bright eyes that spent years staring at a hospital's ceiling. for some reason there are two cans of ice cream today. one for him, which is already on its last scoops; and one for them that rests on their lap, still almost full. angel plans on asking for their share once he's finished with his.

but he have to listen to them first. “what system?”

“do you wanna beat the system?” they repeated. smile full of jokes but eyes clear and serious. ”your whole ‘we touch, i deduct years from your life’ situation.”

angel remained silent and didn't say anything. he can feel that something is off aside from the two tubs of ice cream.

and there must be something extremely wrong. his heart is pounding to the extremes. the bowl of ice cream on his hands is a bit colder than usual yet his palms are still sweating.

and then he heard it.

“i'm dying.” they said as if to curse him. a curse he should've expected. a curse that he put on himself when he walked to their hospital room for the first time. “a month from now. or maybe a few weeks. or maybe even tomorrow. i won't last that long.” they continued. their eyes avoided his and the emotions swirling in them. “so i thought, why not make it today.”

”let's talk about other things.” angel can already see the direction of the conversation. and he wishes to avoid it.

however, they only smiled at him and returned their gaze. now they're the ones who ignored them. “i want to feel if your hands are warm, angel. or if they're cold from the number of bowls of ice cream that you held.”

he was speechless. it's been so long since he felt something like this. since he felt something this humane. and of all the things that he can feel again, why is it this certain emotion. why must it be betrayal and sadness. even regret.

“i'll come back tomorrow.” the angel devil said and prepared to leave. his bowl still has a few scoops of ice cream left.

it was cowardly, he admit. he's such a coward for running away in this situation. for not facing it when he should've known what he is dealing with when he chose to eat ice cream with them and sit on their bed. he should've been prepared to face this when he came back time and time again to see them.

”how can you be sure that i'll still be here tomorrow?” they asked the question he feared.

but like a coward, he decided to turn his back on his fear. on them.

”i'll come back tomorrow.” he repeated and closed the door to their hospital room.

---

the last time he entered their hospital room, they were not alone. the door swinged open just as he was about to turn their knob. it's their doctor. like usual, she have a forlorn look on her face. and angel can't help but look over them. they haven't noticed them yet and maybe that's why there was a bothered look on their face.

“what did your doctor said?” he asked and picked the ice cream on the table. the same ice cream that by each time he returns get blander and colder.

they just smiled at him. it was a sad one.

“i have until tomorrow.”

the angel devil was right in his decision to just hold the ice cream tub in their hand and not open it. it was funny. because he cannot blame anyone but himself for his situation.

“won't you kiss me goodbye, angel?” they added, the sad tone of their voice being an octave lower.

but he can only wallow in self-pity and hate. it was his choice. from day one, he was the one who choose to take a step back, peek and enter their hospital room. right from the start, they were the ones who turned the old door knob to the room. they choose to open the 58th hospital room, their hospital room. and he opened himself to the possibility of being hurt. but he didn't brace himself for it. all he did was fall deeper and deeper for a human that is not even healthy. to someone who seems as if the last time they saw the sun outside was last year. it was his choice to enter their room. it was his choice to sit in their bed. it was choice choice to hurt himself and them.

they were his choice. he choose them.

and he also chooses to eat the bowl of ice cream on his hands in their current situation. he chooses to scoop a spoonful of soft serve into his mouth mechanically. he can barely register its taste. he can barely recognize the ice cream's flavor. but he made sure that it left a mark on his tongue. it might be his last after all.

a smile graced their lips, probably the last they'll ever see, and angel etched it on his memory. “right. you loved ice cream.”

he can see them resist the urge to cradle his head and comb his hair. he can understand them. since for all the times they are together, they kept their word of not touching them. they never touched them even once. just as how he resisted to just fall on his knees and drop his tired body on them. they both resisted the thing that they both wanted.

the angel devil was first a devil, an angel second. and the devil in him finally made a decision.

”do you only have until tomorrow?” he confirmed, tongue still coated with ice cream.

“yes.”

“and do you still want to know whether my hands are warm, just like how you made me feel? or if it is cold, just as how i feel right now?” he added. “do you still want to part with me with just a shallow kiss?”

”yes.” they answered, head still relaxed on their pillow and back on their comfortable hospital mattress. they've been laying down since the time they told him they were dying.

the angel devil asked his final question. one he'll always remember. and one he never got an answer.

“do you know how soft serve ice cream tastes like?”

his cold hands met the warm flesh of their cheeks and his own eyes witnessed how their eyes widened with surprise. is it due to the temperature of his palm? or his palm itself? angel can never be sure. he never got the confirmation. but he saw how their cheeks became painted with different shades of red and how their eyes locked on his, with certainty and conviction. they're not one to back out. they have nothing to return to from this point on.

as he caress their face, he's also taking the last of their life.

with one dip of his head, the angel devil landed his lips on the human damned to a hospital bed. of the human he only saw through a small door window before, fidgeting with their hands anxiously as they stitch an angel rag doll.

it was warm. angel finally realized what he is missing in all those times. their cheeks are warm. so is their forehead were his own forehead rest. and their lips. it welcomed him warmly. the same warmth that they made them feel. even warmer.

angel doesn't have to say the word. they slightly parted their lips and invited his tongue inside to explore the mouth that laughed when he lazily lick his ice cream. angel's tongue probed the same mouth that told him daring words and sweet nothings, his everything(s). he passionately kissed the lips that dared him to do the last thing he thought he'll do to the person he love: to touch and to let them go. it's ironic how much he wants to touch them yet can not. it's ironic how much he held back just for this moment.

angel is not sure whether they tasted the remnants of ice cream still on his tongue. or whether they felt the warmth that they so desired. or if it was the opposite.

but the healing dying kiss was different from the cold soft-serve ice cream that is always on the table beside their hospital bed. everything about them and their lips is warm and comforting. and he wants to bask in it. he wants to bathe in the sunlight that they provide in the four corners of the enclosed hospital room. angel finally realized how it feels to hold the sun and the stars. but even the sun can lose its rays. even the stars can lose their light. the sun can be destroyed and stars always die leaving a cold black hole in its wake. summer can easily become winter in the blink of an eye. and like all the warm things in the world, it became chilly. he can feel their lips slowly lose their warmth.

until all that was left was cold.

END.

”what happened to the patient that you always visited? in room 58?”

“they left.”

a small nod was made by aki who cannot see the sullen look on the angel devil's face. the fine man in suit added. “about time. they were supposed to be discharged weeks ago. why are you surprised? you didn't know?”

author's note(s): it's been a year since i last read the manga and i haven't started the anime yet but i just realized the angst potential of my favorite chainsaw man character, angel devil. expect to see more contents like this soon. bye bye~

[somemydayy]

Cigarette

Summary: Aki realized his harmful addiction wasn’t just cigarettes.

“You smoke?”

Aki Hayakawa was many things. A young man without a family, a orphan to be more specific. A public safety devil hunter. A smoker. And now your ex-boyfriend.

“Aki don’t you know it’s bad for you?”

He recalled the many times you told him you hated the smell of cigarettes. How so many times you told him, to stop. It was killing him. That this addiction was harmful, and deadly. But so was his profession. And you found no whelms in that, but somehow you found it in his cigarettes.

“Can’t you stop smoking for me? Please…”

He knew you resented him, for not stopping. That this addiction was killing him, you would always tell him so. He knew death was inevitable, and he told you so. But all you could do was watch him with the saddest eyes, and the indisputable truth slipping past your trembling lips in frustration.

“Aki, just once please. Can’t you give it up for me? You can try if you put your mind to it.”

Aki did stop, but that was only for a short time. When you were hospitalized due to having health issues. He solely stopped because it was recommended by doctors, but mostly because you asked him to with the most sorrowful gaze in your eyes he had ever seen.

“Aki if your going to smoke, don’t do it in front of me.”

He knew it was selfish, but not long after you were recovered, and back home to your shared apartment did he start smoking again. He simply couldn’t help it. It was the pleasure of a long drag of his cigarette, pressed flush against his lips that made him relax. The notion of intoxicating nicotine was the only thing that helped him cope with lose, frustration but most of all the loneliness.

“Aki that shit will kill you.”

The mere sight of your frown was enough to have him put it out, whenever you caught him smoking. You could only shake your head as you saw him look away, avoiding your gaze. With those eyes full of regret and lingering feelings slipping out of them. Oh how many times had you seen him simply stare out in a daze whenever he smoked. It wasn’t like you couldn’t comprehend it, far from it.

“I hate whenever you smoke! I hate it.”

He lost loved ones. His family, and fellow Public Safety Devil Hunters that fought beside him. You tried to understand, but you couldn’t comprehend it. For you understood the pain of losing loved ones, the pain of having to see they’re lifeless bodies, and having to say goodbye as they are declared deceased. But never did you have to feel the weight of their lives in your hands, and losing them to a devil.

“Smoking again, really Aki.”

Be it your own frustration you wished he stopped because he was simply sending himself toward a early grace. He knew this to be the undisputed truth, even now. When he knowingly made a contract with the Future Devil.

“You never listen, do you? I told you to put it out. We’re having guests coming over.”

Honestly you hated how more often than not you found yourself washing his clothes. Desperately trying to have that smell go away. It was a bother, you knew, but you even avoided physical contact with him because of it. Because of his habits. And he more often than not took notice of the way you avoided his kisses, and touch whenever he finished smoking his cigarettes on the veranda.

“Stop smoking that shit before dinner, Aki!”

But he simply couldn’t comprehend for the life of him, why he simply continued to do it. Maybe it was in the way his old mentor Himeno got him hooked on the damn thing. Or how the loss, and suffering he endured lead him on this path. To finally be able to stop the Gun Devil. And he knew, he didn’t have long to live.

“It’s the same as you actively choosing to poison yourself! Damn it, Aki your killing yourself!”

And maybe cigarettes were the only way to deal with that indisputable fact. Maybe he liked drowning in his own smoke of his cigarettes than the sorrow of what he felt whenever he saw you slowly losing the love you once held for him.

“It’s me or your cigarettes. Aki, it’s your choice. If I don’t matter to you, should we just end it?”

With tears in your eyes, Aki could never know how to comfort you. Work, family, and life in general was hard enough. And maybe he added to that burden, maybe it was better to end it.

“Let’s break up, Aki. I can’t do this anymore, and neither can you.”

And end it you did, and maybe that was for the best. Because you were always standing on that line between giving up, and seeing how much more you can take.

“Goodbye, Aki. Take care of yourself. Please…”

Because you can’t sell dreams to someone who has walked through nightmares. And just maybe, just maybe you knew he would never change. But the love you shared with each other was nice while it lasted. Because the strongest drug that exists for a human is another human being. And Aki was that drug, the raging heart of the man you loved. But you loved yourself more. Well enough to hold that flickering light of hope, dreaming that he would change for you. But maybe it wasn’t just him, maybe you realized the same thing. This could only end badly, burned out and discarded just like his cigarette. So you left, before that could happen.

“I just wished you loved me, more than your cigarette for once.”

© Somemydayy 2022 | Please do not copy or alter this writing on Tumblr or any other platform.

[hxoney]

Aki 😮‍💨🫠

[movedtolilmouzee]

𝔗𝔥𝔢 𝔰𝔦𝔪𝔭𝔩𝔢 𝔱𝔥𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰 𝔦𝔫 𝔩𝔦𝔣𝔢...

𝘌𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘢𝘬𝘪.

(𝚉𝚎𝚎'𝚜 𝙽𝚘𝚝𝚎- 𝙷𝚎𝚕𝚕𝚘 𝙷𝚎𝚕𝚕𝚘! 𝚘𝚖𝚐 𝚣𝚎𝚎 𝚠𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝚝𝚘𝚔𝚢𝚘 𝚛𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚗𝚐𝚎𝚛𝚜?!? 𝚂𝚞𝚛𝚙𝚛𝚒𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝙸 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠, 𝚊𝚗𝚢𝚠𝚊𝚢 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚒𝚜 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚊 𝚜𝚒𝚖𝚙𝚕𝚎 𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚕𝚎 𝚝𝚎𝚜𝚝 𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚢, 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚜𝚎𝚎 𝚒𝚏 𝙸 𝚜𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚋𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚌𝚑 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚊𝚗𝚒𝚖𝚎)

Aki hadn't ever considered where he'd be in life right now. Cuddled in his bed with the love of his life, His fingers running through your hair untangling your bed head, watching your chest rise and fall as you refused to wake up from your sleep. Aki never knew he'd be so lucky to have something so wonderful like you in his life but what he did know was that he cherished it everyday.

Aki's morning routine will occasionally differ depending on you. When you do wake up when aki does, he'll let you lay on his chest while he gently scratches your back, giving you soft forehead kisses and just having small conversations with you while you wake up. Once you've both had some time to wake up, Aki will pick out his clothes either his usual work suit or clothes he can wear to lounge around the house in. He'll happily wait for you to do the same or help you pick an outfit.

Once you both have your clothes ready He'll start a shower for the both of you, waiting for the water to warn up while stripping himself out of his clothes and setting them in the hamper before stepping into the shower, letting you know that the water was warm enough for you to step in. Aki will prioritize washing your hair and body first. He loves when you lean into his touch while he's massaging the shampoo into your hair. After he's done with you, he'll do his usual routine and step out of the shower, grabbing a towel for you and him.

Aki makes getting dressed easier by just setting the clothes near the bathroom sink so you can dry off and slip into your clothes without having to travel all across the house. After you're both dressed and dried off, aki will get your toothbrush ready and will brush his teeth with you softly humming.

Aki doesn't really care much for breakfast most days but he'll make a small batch of either pancakes, eggs with toast and bacon, or anything you like. If you don't enjoy eating breakfast aki will happily skip the meal and start to make himself a cup of coffee. Offering to make you a cup as well if you enjoy coffee, if not he'll offer different drinks that adjust more to your liking.

Once breakfast is made, drinks are done, aki will walk outside and sit down in his chair, cigarettes sitting on the table next to him, coffee and newspaper in hand. When you sit outside with him, he'll sip on his coffee while listening to you talk. When you're done or choose not to sit outside, he'll smoke a cigarette and read his newspaper.

Life with Aki is simple and happy.

[umigoomi]

My boy Aki ✨

[k-0re]

"Aki Hayakawa... You've certainly put something outrageous in my mouth this time.."

[infernalodie]

𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞 || 𝐀𝐤𝐢 𝐇𝐚𝐲𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐰𝐚

“𝘠𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳 𝘋𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘨𝘰 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳 𝘛𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦“

Inspo: Chelsea Cutler - please

Pairing: Aki Hayakawa x Fem!reader

Summary: All he wants is for you to stay.

Warnings: Angst and character death.

Words 1025

Steam floated through the air, touching every surface within the bathroom. Some escaped under the crack of the bathroom door, slithering up in Aki’s room where he sat smoking a cigarette. Eyes fixated on the wooden door, worry lingering in his bones. Because beyond that door, you sat inside the shower, curled up in a ball. The water shooting from the shower head masked the tears that fell freely from your eyes.

In a few hours, Makima would order you to be killed. A truth that you had accepted the moment you joined Public Safety with Power a few years back. But the hard part was accepting that soon, you would no longer be able to see Aki. To feel his arms around you in the middle of the night when you had those terrible nightmares. Or dealing with the incessant badgering from both Power and Denji.

You were a devil hybrid almost similar to Denji in the way that instead of chainsaws, you had katanas. But unlike Denji, you felt it every time you had to use the form. Feeling the blades emerge from your arms and your head like extra limbs from your body. You’d had enough of Makima using you as some sort of weapon and decided death was the only better option here.

No one knew of your decision, but Makima expected it and told Aki for his own safety. Not knowing what you might do with your new change of heart.

You didn’t have a few screws loose like Denji or Power. Sure, you didn’t mind killing demons and you did it to survive, but you weren’t insane. The weight of your actions was known to you, but you had long reached your breaking point. It’d only been a matter of time before you gave up on trying to suffer through the pain your body endures.

A knock at the door alerted you, lifting your head to see the blurred figure of Aki opening the door. The steam obscures his figure and your figure as well. He could see you, looking up at him curled in the corner of the shower. “Y/n, you okay?”

His voice was like silk to the ears. So soft and warm that you wanted to just drown in it forever. He was the one safe place you could seek refuge. It just hurt a lot more knowing that you would never see him or hear that voice after today.

Swallowing the lump in your throat, you forced a smile. “Uh, yeah, I’m fine.” You sniffled seeing him sit down on the toilet by the shower.

He clasped his hands together, head hung low as he glanced up at you. Watching you lean forward, wiping the steam away from the glass, finally revealing your soft features. “Are you okay?” You asked tilting your head cutely at him.

Aki rubbed his hands together, already itching for another cigarette to ease himself. But he knew how you felt about the smell. Always on the edge of sickness whenever you got a whiff of the smoke. “You’re leaving, aren’t you?” He asked, eyes stinging with tears as he looked up at you.

The sight alone was a surprise to see. You knew Aki well enough to know that he doesn’t cry in front of people. He mourns people he considers friends in secret. It’s interesting to now see as you know all Devil Hunters are strong-willed and never show a dabble of sympathy or genuine emotions. And this coming from your captain shook you to your core. Mainly because you were the reason for him to feel such a way.

“Aki.” You whispered, shutting off the shower and grabbing a towel. Wrapping it around your figure, you stepped out of the shower and crouched down in front of him. Hands finding their place over his and squeezing them softly. “It’s something I have to do. I can’t do this anymore. Makima is just a heartless bitch who is going to use me until I am not needed anymore and will kill me.”

“I can’t talk to her, work something out,” he suggested desperately. “I can ask for her to transfer you to the civilian sector-”

“She won’t go for it, Aki!” You told him. “She wants me as close as possible. Sending me there will just give her more reasons to have me killed.”

Aki inhaled deeply, looking up at you through crystalized eyes. “Please, don’t leave.” His hands came up and cupped your cheeks. They were soft and warm, so warm that you thought you could melt in their hold. You wanted to stay here forever, comforting the boy and telling him you would never leave him, but you couldn’t. Not when Makima treated you the way she did. You saw it better being killed by hers or Aki’s hand instead of dying going through the transformation of your demon form.

Holding his wrists, you smiled through the tears in your eyes. “I can’t, Aki. But I want you to know that I’ll always be here-” you placed a hand on the center of his chest as he shook his head with a sob. “-and I’ll never truly leave you.”

He didn’t know how to make this place a home for you. Or how to make you just stay near and put up with your guys’ boss being the way she’s always been. All he wanted was for you to stay and not be another person to leave him.

But he knew you good enough to know that you had burned every bridge you had. Ghosting all your friends to save you the hesitance of your decision. You were someone that followed through on things you were insistent on. This was one of those things.

Aki sat there, repeating your words in his head when you stood and left the bathroom, even when you packed a bag and left. He sat there in the bathroom as he leaned back and inhaled deeply. There was a small break of silence until the sound of gunshots filled the air and Aki felt his heart shatter into a million pieces.

[karasunos-whore]

Aki really wake up EVERY morning and do his hair in a stiff ass ponytail and be like, “yeah this is it😎” and walk out the house like he did sum🤦🏾‍♀️(that’s still my man tho😔)

[ebi-noodle-doodles]

kon

[i-literally-cant-with-this]

A/N = Aki burrowed into my brain yesterday after finishing Chainsaw Man. I hadta write something. This is a little twisty & turny. Aki & F!y/n/reader have a bit of a history. I don't get too much into that. But they get together here. Who knows where they end up? It's just a quick little blah blah blah.

C/W = P -> V (unprotected), a little bit of emotional stuff (they have a history, it wasn't all kittens and rainbows). If I missed anything else, let me know so I can fix this.

It was nearing the end of fall, your second favorite season. Aki and his friends came over to help you clean out the leaf-filled rain gutters in your new house. And for free (you insist on paying them, though)! But did he expect a tip? Do you want his?

You sat on your porch steps and sipped on iced tea as Aki's friends were busy cleaning the gutters. Aki was at the top of your roof, and you couldn't see much of anything other than his legs and feet.

"Thanks a lot for hiring us, Miss y/n. My little girl is gonna have a nice Christmas thanks to you." His friend gushed about his daughter for a while before moving on to the next section of the rain gutter.

Aki climbed down the ladder and came over to you. "Y/n, may I please use your restroom? Could you show me where it is?" He smiled. Not a large smile, but you knew he wasn't the type for donning a wide grin. You appreciated that about him. He seemed more genuine than other people. He was calmer, too.

"Oh, yeah, of course. Follow me, please."

He walked toward you and extended his hand to help you up, and you led him through the kitchen to the back hallway of your house.

"It's right through there just ta‐OH!" He pressed you into the gray wall and held you there with his hips against yours. His arms were on either side of you, hands palm down on the wall and essentially trapping you.

The thing is, you felt anything but trapped. You felt like you were home. You were home. But where you always lived alone, it was just a house. With Aki here, standing over you, it felt like so much more.

"What's with the 'please'?" He put his face into your neck.

"Heyyy Aki." You spoke breathily, your face flushed from his touch. Your cunt all but wetting your exposed skin because you didn't wear panties today. And your skirt wasn't too long, either. There wasn't really anywhere to hide.

"Mmm... y/n..." he trailed off. His mouth was hot against your neck as he left little bites and kisses on your skin. His breathing was cool and steady in comparison to yours. He moved his right hand to squeeze your breast and run his fingertips over your hardened nipple and his left hand started to lift the hem of your skirt. But just as suddenly, he stepped away.

"Excuse me," he looked at you, and you could feel his gaze holding you in place. But he stepped away and pointed to where he thought the restroom was. "M–mmhm. Yeah, t-turn right at the end of the hallway."

When he was out of sight and you heard the door click shut, you slid down the wall. Squatting there for a moment, fanning yourself unsuccessfully with your hand, you heard one of the workers at the front door. "What the hell ...?"

"Miss y/n? Would it be possible for us to get some drinks out here?" The question startled you. "Oh! Ohmigosh, yes. I apologize. I, I, I –" your head fell. Giving up the ruse that you were just in your hallway hanging pictures or something. It wasn't apparent how much his friends knew about you and Aki together.

You appeared from the shadowy space with a smile on your face. A nice little pink hue had taken over your cheeks spanning down to your chest from Aki touching you.

I'll make up some ...? Lemonade? Iced tea?"

"Iced tea will be fine, Miss –"

"Call me y/n! I insist." You said warmly. "There's no need for such formalities. I'll be right out [male name]."

You set to work making up a pitcher of iced tea for everyone who's working. Your back was to the side entrance into the kitchen, and Aki snuck up behind you and slid his hands around your waist

"Oh! Aki..." You moaned a little louder than intended and leaned your head back over your shoulder. "The drinks..." You whispered, putting your hands on top of his that were holding the rolled edge of the counter.

He pushed his crotch against your ass as he breathed into your ear. "You got something I can use to wet my whistle?" He tucked his thumb into the waistband of your skirt, pulling the fabric down and softly bit the nape of your neck, causing you to shutter and jump back against him.

"You don't have to go through the trouble of getting the drinks for them," He chuckled. "They're busy with their work anyway."

"But [male name] asked me for some iced tea and ... and ..." You couldn't think with Aki's thumb so close to your throbbing core.

"What if I said I want you?" He started to walk you backward out of the kitchen. "What if I said I want my mouth all ... over ... you.

"But ... the, the dri–" you mumbled.

He took your face in his hands. His blue eyes hypnotize you where you stand. You reached out and traced his lips with your finger. He opened his mouth and bit your finger lightly. "What if I said I want you ... all over me."

You nodded your head slowly at his request. He led you down the hallway to the guest room, and you followed him willingly. But you wondered if he planned this out beforehand. Truth be told, you couldn't care less. You'd follow him just about anywhere.

When you arrived at the room, Aki closed the door behind you, and he clicked the small lock on the doorknob. He immediately started unbuttoning your shirt, kissing the exposed skin as he did.

"Mmm ... Aki ... someone could...see through the window if they're cl–ah– cleaning the gutters ..." You didn't have it in you to protest and conjure up scenarios you really didn't care about.

You were pretty sure his friends didn't have their tools and ladders at the back of the house yet. Because with the blinds open, you'd be pretty easy to see. Aki seemed to ignore your protests as he threw your shirt on the floor, pulled down your skirt, and laid you down before you could even take a breath.

"Aki..." You sat up, "I ... we ..."

He kissed you deeply, "Shh shh shhh. It's me. Just relax. Ok? I'll pull the blinds." He laughed softly.

You nodded your head and noticed just how tightly your brows were furrowed. You concentrated on relaxing them.

"Better," he smiled at you.

"Mmmm," you exhaled heavily as you ran your hands through his dark hair. "It's been too long..."

He laid down on his back, propped up on the fluffy pillows, put both of his arms out, and motioned for you to get on top of him.

"It's not been that long." He said, rather confident in his decision.

"Oh yes, it has." You slid down his body, unbuckling his belt and unbuttoning his pants. You unzipped the fly and reached into his boxers. "See, even you're excited." You smiled as you pulled his hard cock from his pants.

You laid down on the bed next to him and wrapped your hand around him. "Aki, fuck, I want you."

He slid his hand down between your legs and moaned at the feeling of your wetness. "I'm excited? Look – look at this! He dipped a couple of fingers just inside your pussy and gathered up some of your wetness. He rubbed it over his cock with his hand.

"It's only been a few months y/n. And besides, you were ..." He slid his fingers back into you. "You were cheating on me with ... with that piece of shit." He pulled out his fingers and held your gaze as he stuck them into his mouth, licking them clean.

"That wasn't cheating. It was just sex."

He raised his eyebrows at your statement.

"Why are you looking at me like that? You're the one who didn't want ... y'know, never mind. You're here now. I'm not 'cheating' on you with anyone." You began to move closer toward him on the bed.

"Is that all we are y/n?" He said it matter-of-factly. "Sex?"

"What? No. Aki ... you know me better than that."

"Yeah, I know you, y/n. But do you know me. I had to leave for a while. It's not like I wanted to go away. To be away from you." He was starting to look a little sad. The way he does when you hurt him unintentionally. The way he does when he knows you didn't mean to, though it still feels like a knife to the back. But his shoulders slump a little bit, and he has trouble keeping his eyes on yours.

It breaks your heart.

"Aki, I asked if you wanted me to wait for you. I'm sure you didn't hold out for me all that time." You stood up and peeked out the blinds. No one seemed to be looking, so you went back to the bed.

He started to sit up, but you pushed him down. "Stay. Stay right there." You turned around and straddled him. You kissed him softly.

"Y/n..."

"What is it, Aki?" You breathed against his lips.

He shook his head and looked away. "I, I..."

"What Aki?" You were more insistent this time. "Tell me."

"I love you, y/n," he whispered, his lips just barely brushing yours as you hovered over him. "I missed you so much, and I love you. I just ... I want you." He ran his hands on the underside of your thighs, grabbing your ass he pulled you closer over his lap and lined himself up with your entrance.

You carefully lowered yourself onto him and tipped his chin up with your fingers so the two of you were inches apart. He looked at you as though he might cry.

"I missed you too, Aki, but we've been without each other for a while." You began to move up and down on him slowly. "How do you feel about the time we were apart? Were you with anyone else?"

He shook his head. "I was scared of what would happen if i was, y/n. I didn't want to hurt you. I don't know if I should want you, though. Do you w–." He stopped himself. Partially because of how good you felt and because he didn't want to know the answer.

"Do I what, Aki?" You put your forehead against his.

He shook his head, unable to voice his question.

"I'm sorry, Aki. I didn't know you wanted me to wait for you. But I would never cheat on you. I'm sorry that I ... that I – well, you know."

"I know, I know." He said as he rubbed your back. "It's ok. It's not your fault. I ... I know that. Fuck. Look at me. Whining while you're fucking me. What a gentleman." He laughed to himself. "This is embarrassing."

You kissed him. "No. Don't be. You have nothing to be embarrassed about. I don't mind, though." You pressed your lips to his ear and whispered, "I missed you so much. Any extra closeness we get is a bonus."

Aki nodded, and you were relieved he didn't try to continue the previous conversation.

"Aki? What's your favorite position?" You asked him as you fucked him. "With me, of course."

He wrapped his hands around your waist and pulled you close. "This is my favorite position. On my back, you on my cock so I can see your pretty face and pretty mouth twist around. I wanna see how good I make you feel."

His words, his face. Just him being him was pushing you over the edge. "I'm gonna cum, Aki ... oh ... ah shit ..."

He grabbed your ass as he thrust upward. "You're gonna cum just like this, aren't you?" He groaned.

"Y-yes... yes, Aki, please. Oh ... my god, I've missed you so much! Please stay with me, I want you." You bounced up and down on his cock, your tits covered his face. He licked and sucked on your nipples while his hands sat at your waist.

"Aki, I'm cumming!" You cried out as you leaned over to brace yourself against his chest. "Fuck ... oh fuck!" You panted, and cried out, your head falling back as your orgasm flooded through your body.

"S'fuckin' hot, cum for me y/n," he grabbed your ass hard and lifted you up, sliding his cock out of you. "Turn around." He held you by the waist and moved so you were on the bottom. Knees on the bed and your ass in the air.

"Spread your legs." He placed his hand on the back of your thigh, pushing it apart. You looked over your shoulder at him. "Let me see how much you missed me." He sneered.

Aki pushed his cock back into your pussy from behind and slammed into you. He squeezed your ass with his left hand and reached around you with his right hand to pinch your nipple.

"Aki! Yes ... fuck ... please. Please ... I missed you so much, don't... don't stop!" You grabbed the pillow under your head and gripped it as he fucked you harder.

"Oh, you missed me?" He pulled out of you and turned you over on the bed. He held your legs up and slid right into you again.

"YES!" You shouted as he slammed back into you, fucking you hard. His face was contorted as if in pain or pleasure or both.

"You like it rough, huh y/n?"

"I like it with you." You said. Tears stream down your face from another impending orgasm. "I only like it with you, Aki!" You threw your legs down on the bed and wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him in to kiss you.

"What if I say I wanna make you cum like THIS?" He slammed into you hard.

You arched your back, lifting your ass into the air and whimpered, "Please, please Aki, cum inside me.

He slammed into you once more. His body convulsed as he came. "Fuck! Yes! Ah y/n!"

The two of you were so lost in your own little world that you didn't hear Aki's friends by the guest bedroom window.

"C–can we have some iced tea now, Miss y/n?"

Thank you for reading!

╭╯Sarah╰╮

[kittyzu]

Love me, not .. ❤︎

warnings - angst, references to cheating, references to sex

you’ve lost track on the amount of times he’s told you he loves you without his smile ever reaching his eyes. he stares but it’s almost like he’s looking through you, avoiding your eyes any chance he gets.

your friends had warned you about guys like aki. they never really settle down and if they do, they’re bound to hurt you.

he’s only ever paid attention to his friend. a long time friend who he tells you not to worry about.

the problem with that is when you’re having sex. everything feels fine, good even and he’s always attentive but it’s when his in the throes of passion that he lets his name slip. you should feel broken, sad but you can’t bring yourself to care because despite all that, aki is home, with you, inside you.

“fuck” he groans and you can almost hear it, squeezing your eyes shut so you don’t have to see the blissed out expression on his face as he cums inside you for the third time, with someone else on his mind.

angel …

you know you’ll never compare so you don’t compete. you’re happy to have aki to yourself any chance you get and even when it hurts the most, you’ll be damned if you ever left.

you love him.. even when you know he’s never going to fully return those feelings.

[somemydayy]

Taste of Cigarettes

Summary: After losing Aki, you took up a harmful addiction. The very same one you broke up with him because of.

Based on this post.

———

She always hated the taste of tobacco lingering on his lips anytime she kissed him. She hated the way he ultimately choose his addiction instead of her. She hated the fact she left him because of it. But most of all she hated that the fact her heartache lead her to seek out comfort in that damn thing she so often constantly criticized, and scrutinized him over.

But after all was said, and done she was no better than a hypocrite. She took up that same cigarette she said she hated, and smoked it until she was left with nothing, but bitter regrets, sorrow and the pure notion of heartbreak for a lost love. Her first and only lost love, Aki Hayakawa. And so in the cigarettes she so previously despised, she sought comfort in.

She reached out into the sky, desperately trying to catch but a glimmer of hope, of him, of Aki. But that was before she heard the rooftop’s door slam wide open. And a certain dark haired man let out a horse shout her way.

“Thought I’ll find you here!” The dark haired young man said with a shallow breath. And only a gasp of air was heard soon afterwards.

“You really gave me some trouble, back there you know that? Walking away right after our mission, we still have a report to submit.”

“Work was finished, what else was I supposed to do? Or was it that you missed me too much? Was that it, pretty boy?” She let out a puff of smoke of her lips, as they curved up into a grin as she held the cigarette in her fingers.

“That’s not what I meant!” Yoshida couldn’t help the reddening of his cheeks engulf him fully. Maybe she hit the nail in the head, but maybe he was just simply too afraid to admit it himself.

“Just don’t go off on your own next time, alright.”

Yoshida thought that he knew what beautiful souls look like, until he saw hers; Broken and hurt, black with the dust of cruelty, but still brighter then the sun.

“What are you even doing?”

And as he saw the way her lips crinkled into a slight grin, and the way her eyes stared off into the setting sun. Did Yoshida feel the raging thumping of his heart blaring against his chest? Yes, of course he did. And it was a bittersweet feeling.

She always seemed to look off into the sky, as if waiting with the most precious little thing to make a unexpected appearance. Waiting, pondering, expecting something she knew that was impossible, was out of her reach. Waiting until the day she could find, and seek out her convictions.

She had little innocent demons inside her eyes, and they recklessly played with matches. And Yoshida Hirofumi never saw sparks so pretty.

She was a beautiful soul like no other, branded with the sadness of loss, and death. Be it curiosity, or his own damn intrigue; Yoshida couldn’t help but let the words slip past his lips.

“I didn’t know you smoked.” Yoshida looks at her expectedly, but all he can see is the soft grimace of her lips before a soft chuckle leaves them.

“Neither did I.” With the saddest look spread across her features, he had ever seen did Yoshida gaze at her. With just a single glance did he conclude that the emotion he witnessed across her delicate features was heartache. And Yoshida couldn’t help, but take notice of the way her voice was harsh and horse. As if repressing a piercing ear shattering scream, but with just a voice above a gentle whisper did she spill out those words. But what he heard, and saw next was the hardest pill to swallow.

A single tear fell down the apple of her cheeks, and soon a soft grimace reached the corners of her lips. Her next words were barely above a whisper, soft and gentle like the first time she asked for his name. But this wasn’t the same, because this feeling was heartache.

“We’re all addicted to something that takes away the pain.” He wondered what was behind that expression. Was it sorrow? Was it pain? Was it loneliness? Was it love? Was it adoration? Was it heartache? Was it regret? Or maybe it was all rolled up into one. Heartbreak, hurt, lose over someone else. And he finally came to a realization, that it was love.

“What?”

“Oh, nothing.”

“Your curious aren’t you?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean everyone is. It’s to be expected, why did someone like me became a Public Safety Devil Hunter?”

“It was just something, someone I Ioved did. It was his passion, but ultimately it was the very same thing that, I lost him too.”

“To work? Was he a workaholic or something?”

“Something like that, yeah.” She lied threw her teeth, but maybe the truth was to hard even for her, for him, to bare. So she resolved to tell a half-true. Neither lying, neither telling the whole truth. Just a little of both, maybe.

“But it really isn’t some grand story, or anything like that. It’s just, I thought he looked cool in his suit while saving people. That’s all.”

“Your kidding, right?” Yoshida could barely hold back his shock as he heard the words slip out of her mouth.

“What can I say I’m a sucker for a handsome guy in a suit.” But the smile she let out, didn’t reach her eyes. They were still, and void of any emotion. Sadness engulfed her eyes, and Yoshida couldn’t begin to describe the hole he felt in his chest. Empty, but filled with so much love, but also sorrow. And he wondered if that was what she felt before, and even now.

“No matter the reason, I’m glad I got the opportunity to meet you.” And Yoshida knew it was wrong, but he couldn’t help but tell her, his truest feelings.

“Love is a fickle thing, but I still believed in it. But well that was then, when I had still had Aki, by my side.” As he looked back at her, all he could see was the most breathtaking sight ever. Her with a gentle smile cast across her tear stained cheeks, broken, but so beautiful at the same time nonetheless. A morbid curiosity crossed his mind in a wave. And Yoshida wondered if she’ll cry for him if he died, too.

“Do you still think of him?” Yoshida’s heart was caught in his throat, as a feeling of pain filled him whole.

He didn’t know much, but from what Denji carelessly divulged to him in his splinter of the moment; at the cafe did Yoshida come to understand you, and your heartbreak. You loved a Devil Hunter named Aki Hayakawa. A man who gave his life, to stop the gun devil and in doing so he got possessed, and ultimately ended up dead.

“Everyday.” Yoshida never knew heartbreak until now. With the way her face lit up with adoration, affection and love as she spoke about him. And honestly it hurt him to no end. Could you believe it, Yoshida jealous of someone? Jealous of a man you loved? Yoshida knew the pit in his chest was hurt, despair, and jealousy. Because of her, because of that damn fool who left, and got himself killed.

“You have to let it all go. The way he kissed you, the way he smelled, the way he touched your waist, and pulled you in. You have to let it go, and you have to let him go. Because that’s who he was, not who he is.”

“Please let him go.”

Yoshida held in a breath, at her next words. At the way she swept her hair behind her ears, at the way her lips looked pressed firmly against that very cigarette he wished was him.

“To be able to let go of him? It would also feel as if I’d also have to let go of who I’ve been…”

For Hirofumi Yoshida was jealous of a dead man. The very man who broke her heart, into pieces. And he couldn’t help, but let out a loud scream as he engulfed her within his arms.

“But how do I let go of the person that felt like home?”

Yoshida couldn’t help, but wipe away the tears flow down her cheeks. A blunder of words, and breathes had her in a daze. As a silence engulfed the two, as Yoshida held her quivering figure against his own.

“Loving someone doesn’t always mean you fight for them. Sometimes loving someone means letting them go. Forgive him, and yourself. But let him go...” Yoshida said this to himself more than he meant it for her. But alas Yoshida knew it was selfish, but he just couldn’t help how he felt.

Oh how he wished to tell her then, and there that he loved her. But he knew that would be cruel. She was a broken soul, beautiful yet so very tragic. But maybe it was the way her body felt so warm against his own, or the way her lips seemed so tantalizing. Or the way her lavender perfume seemed to ingulf his senses whole, but Hirofumi Yoshida couldn’t help; but steal a kiss from her.

He kissed her. Without warning, without permission. Without even deciding to do it, but simply because he couldn’t have done anything else.

Yoshida knew it was wrong, from the way her hands thrashed at his chest, from at the way her nails scratched his forearms. From the way her eyes were drowning in tears, and from the way her lipstick was smeared against his lips. But especially from the way she landed a hard, and painful slap against his cheek, and then pushed him away; but especially from the way she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. She changed. He could see it in her eyes, feel it in her touch, and especially in the way she didn’t utter a word, or insult. Without saying anything, she said everything.

Hirofumi Yoshida knew he messed up tremendously, and this time a simple apology won’t cut it. No, not this time. Because what he did was break her trust in him. Because breaking someone’s trust is like crumbling up a perfect piece of paper. One can try to smooth it over and over, but it’s never going to be the same ever again. And it never was going to be the same, not with him and especially not with her.

And all Yoshida could do was watch her walk away. And his heart-ached because no matter what he did, nothing would ever be the same ever again. But just as he was wallowing in his despair did he note the sound for her footsteps come to a halt. And a twirl of her hair send his heart into erratics.

“Yoshida, I’ll only say this once so you better listen up. Thank you for reminding me what butterflies feel like; but if you ever do that, again. If you ever kiss me again, without asking; I will kill you.”

And maybe it was his heart set ablaze, the mere notion of her not hating him, but he couldn’t help. But let out a small smile as he thought how she wasn’t just pretty, she was otherworldly; and vaguely threatening and he liked every single part of her.

"Ok, noted— hey wait so does that mean that there’s a next time?”

“Hurry it up Octo-boy we still have to report to headquarters.”

“Hey, wait up!”

And just like that, Hirofumi Yoshida ran after her, with fireworks set ablaze within his chest. Maybe stealing a kiss wasn’t all so bad, but he’ll make sure to ask for her permission next time. But a part of him also wants to see if she’ll really go through with her threat. But for now that could wait. With the biggest smile permanently plastered across his features did he run after her.

© Somemydayy 2022 | Please do not copy or alter this writing on Tumblr or any other platform.

[hxoney]

Aki 💙

[loveiiirene]

Live for me (Without you, I'm all alone)

In another life, I would have really liked just doing laundry and taxes with you.

I give thanks for the days, for the hours

And another way, another life breathin'

I did it all 'cause it feel good. I wouldn't do it at all if it feel bad

Better live your life, we're runnin' out of time

Who gon' pray for me? Take my pain for me Save my soul for me?

If I'm gon' die for you. If I'm gon' kill for you.

Then I'll spill this blood for you.

// X // Everything Everywhere All at Once // All The Stars - SZA, Kendrick Lamar // Pray for me - The Weeknd, Kendrick Lamar // this piece is also inspired by this incredible edit

[zeraaachan]

a petal for aki — teaser

zeraaachan_

pairing(s): aki hayakawa x angel devil

warning(s): angst/no comfort, major character death, manga spoilers

he make flowers bloom yet with the same hands he makes it wither. he witnessed many petals fall off from its mother bud due to his touch.

but no one offered him a petal, 'til he met him.

he was never meant to live for long. his flower was never meant to bloom for eternity. he was a flower that never represented time.

yet he offered a petal from his dying flower to him.

an akiangel alternative universe in which flowers grow on an individual's body at birth and wither at death

THE CHARACTERS

enjeru

labeled as the angel devil due to his mysterious power. with his hands he can make someone's flower bloom a little longer, even a little brighter. but with the same hands he brings death. he made more flowers wither than bloom. he was an angel who can paint roses redder but a devil who can nip someone at the bud.

aki hayakawa

a chosen playmate to the little angel devil and a servant in his adolescence. he witnessed how strangers went on their knees to worship the angel but blame the same child and call him a devil. he was a servant, a mere bystander, and an admirer of the vermilion red hair.

an angel devil x aki hayakawa fanfiction

CHAINSAW MAN