#changbin timestamp

[weird-bookworm]

12:12 ᴀᴍ

warning! reader almost cries

you know those days when you just wake up and everything already feels wrong? yeah, it was one of those days.

maybe it was the fact that yesterday was one of the worst days ever, or maybe it was something else, but all you knew is that today was going to suck.

the worst part was that it was the weekend and you had slept in and even that wasn't enough to make the gloomy feeling go away.

as you lay in your bed, having zero motivation to even check the time, the door burst open, and in bounced a hyper changbin. you weren't expecting him, and almost jumped high enough to fall out of your bed.

he had gotten a few days off and was very excited at the prospect of spending more time with his favourite person.

what he wasn't expecting, was for you to still be in bed, with unruly hair and a lethargic body language. you were usually up and about early, even on weekends (something about your internal clock, you had told him months ago, changbin was too busy staring at you to listen properly).

"baby?" his smile abruptly turned into a pouty frown. you stared up at him from your bed, eyes big and shiny, full of tears ready to fall.

"oh, love," he sighed, removing his jacket and slowly climbing into the bed. he laid down next to you and blinked at the ceiling along with you.

he knew you'd speak up, you were not the kind of person to need prompting to share their feelings. just as he had thought, less than five minutes later, you spoke.

"can you...can you h-hold me?" you don't know why you were stuttering or why you were so hesitant, knowing fully well that the only reason he wasn't already stuck to you like a leech already was because he was trying to give you space, just in case.

he didn't say anything, just wrapped his arms around your middle and tucked your head in the crook of his neck. he was aware how safe laying like this made you feel, and in that moment, all he wanted was to make you feel as secure as possible.

he realised you needed more time to think and share your feelings with him, but right now, this was more than enough, for him, and for you.

[seo-changbinnies]

countdown to binnie’s bday

↳ d-3: a year of mvs

[jjuniehao]

[02:18 am]: seo changbin

“binnie, are you still awake?”

“hmm.”

there’s a silence, changbin seemingly going back to sleep while you try to decide on the best way to get him to agree to your late night escapade plan you’ve been brooding over for the last hour.

it’s not your fault you can’t sleep, and some convenience store ramen or some cheap burger do sound incredibly tempting right now. if only your hunk of a boyfriend wasn’t such a sleepy head, that is.

well, it is 2 am, to be fair. a perfectly reasonable time to be sleepy. also a perfectly reasonable time to get stuffed with junk food on an empty playground, talking about dating worms or the possibility of different universes.

or whatever it is those aesthetic #couplegoals couples do.

you shuffle closer to him, wrapping yourself around him, effectively making him the little spoon. he hums appreciatively, though sleepy, and you can feel his hand come up to rest over yours, lacing your fingers together. you decide to butter him up a little, resorting to littering some kisses on his back, slowly working your way up to his neck.

changbin knows you. he knows your strategy, he’s familiar with your tactics to get him to give in. with a sleepy grumble he frees himself from your grip, turning around to be face to face with you. if he didn’t know that you were about to ask for something he knows he definitely doesn’t feel like doing, he’d coo at you for looking at him so sweetly.

“spit it out,” he grumbles, voice scratchy from sleep, eyes hazy and unfocused. you pout a little from the accusatory tone he has, as justified as it might be, pressing a quick kiss to the corner of his mouth, “what’s that supposed to mean, bin?”

he observes you for a bit, hand eventually coming up to cup your cheek, his eyes carrying a soft look in them now. “baby, we both know you want something. so please, just tell me,” he murmurs, shuffling so your faces are closer, noses practically touching.

placing a few gentle kisses to his lips, your last ditch effort to soften him up enough to agree, “can we go get some snacks? maybe some fries? or ice cream, you were craving ice cream yesterday baby.”

changbin stares at you, his eyes darting all over your face in a desperate attempt to find even the tiniest hint of humour or mischief on your face. “now? now at,” he lifts his head, eyes squinting to read the time on the alarm clock on the bed side table, “at 2 in the morning? baby, really?”

you just nod sheepishly, wrapping your arms around him again and placing a lingering kiss to his jaw. “i think it would be fun.” changbin sighs, closing his eyes in a futile attempt of drowning you out, because every one of your kisses is slowly chipping away at his resolve.

does he want to go out at two in the morning? no, he doesn’t. there is no reason for him to be outside that late, especially not when he could be in bed with you, all cuddled up, warm and cozy instead.

and his love for that warm and cozy feeling is the exact reason he lowly grumbles while getting out of bed, feet dragging against the floor while he searches for a hoodie for you to put on — because it’s the same feeling he gets when you look at him with that lovestruck smile on your face, the same one he knows you’ll give him once you’re happily munching on your ramen later.

“we’re getting ramen.”

part of the bucketlist boyfriends series

*i can’t link it since it won’t show up in tags if i do </3

[lonelystczennie]

7:21 pm(Changbin)

Masterlist

As soon as you walked through the door, Changbin could tell you’d had a long day, making a beeline for him and slumping into his arms, letting him hold you up in a tight hug.

“Hey babe, tough day?” He asked gently, wrapping his arms around you and giving a light squeeze.

“Tighter.” You mumbled into his chest, not answering.

He increased the pressure, finding your neediness cute.

“Tighter.”

“I don’t want to hurt you.” He chuckled, stopping short at the sound of a muffled sniffle from you.

“Y/n?”

He pulled back just far enough to catch sight of your face, feeling his heart drop as he was met with your watery eyes. “No no, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?”

You shook your head. “Today was just really shitty.” You said weakly, tucking your face against his chest.

“Are you okay? Can I do anything?” He asked, feeling his heart break at your quiet whimpers.

“Just hold me, please.”

He wrapped his arms back around you tightly, holding you as close as he possibly could.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you.” He whispered, rocking you slightly. “Binnies got you.”

Eventually, you pulled away, wiping your eyes and before meeting his gaze again. “Sorry.” You croaked.

“Don’t apologize, that’s what I’m here for.” He said, pressing a kiss to your temple.

He couldn’t make whatever was upsetting you go away, but he could make sure to always be there for you as a safe place to land, holding you untill your tears ran out.

[softstraykidshours]

[6:39 am] you rub your eyes as you head into the bathroom to start getting ready for the day, trying to clear the fog of sleep still clouding your brain. you flick on the light and a lime green paper stuck to the mirror instantly grabs your attention.

"good morning cutie!"

the words are written in changbin's messy scrawl and a smile creeps up your lips as you look at it. it's such a simple gesture, but it makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

as you continue on getting ready for the day you keep finding more and more little notes scattered around your apartment.

you open the drawer to grab your hairbrush and find a little blue piece of paper with "love you!" scribbled across it.

when you pull your jeans out of your dresser to put them on you find a bright pink sticky note stuck to the pair beneath them that reads, "nice butt ;)"

in the kitchen you find a yellow one on the pot of fresh coffee he made for you that says, "have a great day at work!" and another green one on top of the yogurt you have every morning for breakfast.

with every part of your morning routine you stumble upon a cute little message from changbin. he must have gotten up extra early to place them around. on top of that he knows you well enough to know all of the little steps you go through on a typical morning.

all of the messages are very short, but adorable nonetheless and you find yourself grinning the entire time you get ready for work. the gesture warms your heart so much and you can't help but fall even more in love with him. you don't think you will be able to wipe the smile off your face for the rest of the day, even if you tried.

[barbi2709]

hyunjin performing with fem!reader?

22:03 || Stage is ready, so are we

Disclaimer: This and each of my stories are only fiction and are not intended to offend or make anyone uncomfortable, if this type of content makes you uncomfortable, feel free to leave without resentment :]

Paring: Idol!Hyunjin x Idol!fem!reader

Genre: fluff

Summary: MAMA awards were one for your favorite times of the year, and being able to perform with your favorite Idol and person makes it even better.

WC: 459

a/n: Hiiii, first of all, thank you soooo much for asking, I really put effort on this to make you happy 🥺❤️❤️, this I my first time doing a request so I hope you like it, also remember that English isn't my first language so if there's any mistakes let me know.

Hyunjin waited patiently backstage, the excitement and adrenaline of the upcoming performance keeping his strength up, but the fact that he was about to perform right next to you made his emotions go out of control.

The sound of the door opening forced him to lift his gaze, running into your beautiful figure entering, Hyunjin couldnt help and smiled the second he saw your beautiful figure enter.

You and Hyunjin had started your relationship a little over a year ago, you met at other award and you immediately had a mutual interest in each other, it didn't take long for you to fall in love because it was what you had been hoping for the most since you met.

—Hey beautiful —he said with a big smile on his face, hugging you tightly as you walked towards him—, are you ready? —he asked gently, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear and looking straight into your eyes, which were sparkling with love.

—Of course I am Jin —you answer as you let him lead you to the chair and sit you down there, while your boyfriend put his arm around you pulling you closer to him—, how about you?

—A little nervous, not gonna lie —he answered honestly and you laughed as you listened to him—. Well, that's how I feel about you! —he defended himself dramatically, which made you laugh a little more, Hyunjin smiled as he listened to you, he really loved hearing you laugh.

The boy was lost looking at your smile, god how much he loved you, since you became his girlfriend, he couldn't help but feel complete, he could experience all the feelings and moments he thought he'd would only see in movies or read about in books, he couldn't help but feel happier with you.

—I'd kiss you right now, but I don't want to be scolded for ruining your makeup —he shamelessly confessed shamelessly, making you blush a little and looked away flustered—. Hey, don't hide, I like it when you blush. —he said as he grabbed your chin to turn your face back to him.

You couldn't help but blush even harder at his actions, not beeing able to handle eye contact with him, while he was looking at you with a smirk because of how cute you looked; a moment passed and you don't even know where you got the courage to kiss his lips gently for a few seconds, just a little peck.

—This works. —said you with a smile as you saw his apologetic look and red cheeks, making you giggle.

—Hyunjin, Y/N, out in 5 minutes, the stage is ready. —one of the staff announced, you smiled and got up from the couch.

—So are we.

[thewonandonly]

AAHAHAHA OKAY, HI ITS JURRASIC WORLD ANON

Can i request a stray kids reaction to their partner absolutely bawling at the brachiosaurous scene please 😭 my friends had to console me for like 10 minutes cause it made me cry so hard

stray kids (ot8) reaction to their partner bawling their eyes out to brachiosaurus' scene &lt;3

synopsis: it's time to watch the jurassic park franchise, and when an absolute devastating scene from the movie released nearly 8 years ago shows up, the boys aren't sure how to react when they find their s/o crying their eyes out.

warnings: gender neutral reader, spoilers?

author's note: guys this is literally me with meet the robinson's. everytime little wonders by rob thomas plays in the movie, BOOM. instantly moved to tears.

thank you so much for the request! please consider reblogging my post and leave a cute little comment to boost my work!!

chan was excited to see jurassic world! jurassic park and the entire franchise was an important part in the film industry, so for him to watch the movie for the first time with the love of his life was an absolute prime decision. the movie started off steady, and then it got interesting. and then, it got sad :( the same brachiosaurus from the first movie was caught in the fire, no where to go as the water expanded across the horizon. it was trapped. it was heartbreaking. gut-wrenching to watch. and he would've cried, he wanted to cry. small sniffles echoed across the living room wall, and he turned to see you laying your head on his shoulder, tears streaming down your cheeks. chan. immediately turned to comfort you, his hand brushing your cheek.

"oh, baby, it's so sad." his hands are gentle, as if he wasn't comforting you over an artificial created brachiosaurus. "it's sad, it's okay to cry." he used his thumb to wipe your tears and paused the movie until you felt consoled enough to continue.

minho had already seen a few of the jurassic park franchise movies. how couldn't he have? it's one of the biggest movie franchises of the world. he hasn't watched recent instillments due to a busy schedule, but when you mention finally watching the recent ones on his day off, he immediately took you up on the offer; popcorn, blankets, a nice comfortable pillow, cuddle sessions and a surround system turned up damn near full blast sounded like the perfect night, especially with his favorite person in the whole world. the movie was not too painful to get through, he did cringe at some dialogue throughout the movie, but all movies have those moments. he would've cried at the scene where the brachiosaurus was stranded on the island, but he personally felt like the scene was a bit rushed. he knew you. the second the scene came to an end, he turned to you and pulled you into his arms, kissing the top of your head.

"you're such a crybaby." he whispered, his hand rubbing your shoulder, "it was a bit sad though." he admitted, chuckling to himself. minho knew how quick to tears you could be at movies, and he'd be lying if he didn't find it cute; it just means you can find sentiment in everything. and he admired that.

changbin is totally a movie buff! he has seen the jurassic park movies at least 6 times in his lifetime, and he was probably one of the firsts leading the crusade for the newest movies. changbin loves the movies, and he was the first person at the movie theaters doors on release day, at the earliest showing, with his large tub of popcorn. so, when you told him you never saw the newest ones, he nearly dropped his jaw. how could you not?! he took this as an opportunity to introduce you to some of the greatest movies he's ever experienced. he set everything up, not accepting help from you, before he pulled out a dvd player, and gently placed the disc into the tray (these were the only dvds he owned tbh). he watched excitedly, peeking at you from the corner of his eye to gauge your reaction: happiness, excitement, tension, and of course, sadness. he cried in the theater when the scene came on, and he isn't afraid to admit that it still makes his heart squeeze watching the scene again.

both you and changbin sat on his bed, crying at the scene, the movie paused on the last glimpse of the brachiosaurus, which only made you both cry your eyes out more. changbin and you didn't share any words, but you both shared tears.

hyunjin can admit he has never seen the jurassic park movies. he wasn't a dinosaur kid, he was an ancient egyptian kid fs. he personally thought the premise of the movies were a bit silly. why would they open these parks if it always ended in disaster? but, here he was, sitting beside you, as you wore your acid-washed jurassic park pajama set, excitedly starting the movie. hyunjin was aware of how often you watched these movies, and how much you loved them, so he had no problem watching them with you if it meant he could see how happy you got (dinosaur kid and ancient egyptian kid solidarity). but one thing he could not understand was how you've watched these movies so many times, and you still cry your eyes out to the brachiosaurus scene.

hyunjin wrapped his arm around your shoulder as you cried, rubbing your shoulder comfortingly. okay, he gets it; the scene is sad, but he truly didn't understand why exactly this was so sad. that is until you cried out how the brachiosaurus in the sad scene was the same one from the very first one. then, he understood, and continued to rub your shoulder sweetly, not bothering to mention how you might have just made him a jurassic park fan.

felix has the entire movies memorized. you know that post on this website that says "i'm gonna watch shrek," and it's just the op replaying the movie through their head because they've watched it so many times? yeah, that's felix with jurassic park. he knows the lines, the jokes, the LORE. he had a 16 year hyperfixation on jurassic park, and he wasn't going to let it die! he's watched it so many times, that when you say you wanted to watch the recent ones, he can't help but say yes, like an excited puppy. i think felix has a good grip on his emotions during movies (or he's like me, where i dont understand something until AFTER i finish the movie) so he doesn't cry when he watches it but once he finishes the credits, the waterworks start.

and when he saw you crying about (in his opinion!!!) the most gut-wrenching scene in cinema, he felt his own tears bubble up, pulling you close to him. he's cried over this scene multiple times by himself, but now, he had someone who would understand where exactly he would be coming from. it was a nice comfort.

jisung... oh, boy. jisung definitely got the film spoiled for himself on twitter or youtube or something. he's not a die-hard fan, but he was planning on watching it soon! (it's been almost 8 years, bud, and it's still on his to be watched list). jisung was upset, and wouldn't open the app again until you sat down and watched it with him. jisung is a crier, he cries to movies, even when they aren't sad. but when they are sad, oh my god! he changes his entire personality to match that movie. he will never shut up about it.

jisung cried before your own tears spilled; the music, the shadow that reflected against the smoke. omg, he was breaking down. seeing him cry so hard, made you cry! well, him and the poor brachiosaurus made you cry. you were both hugging each other as you cried, jisung hiccuping about how it wasn't fair and that he would've went back to save them. he cried for the rest of the night,

seungmin is a lot like minho in a sense. he finds the scene rushed, so he couldn't find it in his heart to cry. seungmin watched the movie already, and he knows what happens. he knows it's sad, but he honestly can't find his tears for the scene, even when he first watched it. the scene to him felt sooooo rushed that he kinda just sat there, staring at the television screen, waiting for it to end.

but, he knew you were crying, so he threw an arm around your shoulder, pulling the blanket back over your legs and let you cry. he didn't have any comforting words to say since he couldn't even cry at the scene, but you were happy he even hugged you for the scene!

jeongin isn't a die-hard fan, or a casual enjoyer. he saw the movie once and called it a night. he didn't have any words to say or not about it. when you asked him if he wanted to watch it with you, he agreed, only because he wanted to spend time with you, and he had an excuse to hold you. i think jeongin doesn't honestly remember the movie, so he has to watch it multiple times to even remember, which is why he isn't much of a die-hard fan.

jeongin was crying by the time the scene came up on the screen, and he turned to look at you as your bottom lip quivered at the scene, your eyes pouring the liquid from your eyes. jeongin hugged you tightly. no words exchanged, only warmth, to give comfort to one another. after his second and third watch, it seems like every time he watches it, he cried like a baby each time. (me with meet the robinsons)

copyright © 2023 thewonandonly. all rights reserved.

[hardstraykidshours]

Changbin and Minho spits in da pussy *cof cof* 🤭

okay, but bestie...this idea? 👀👀 holy shit, i absolutely loved it. like oh my god. the speed with which i wrote this once inspiration struck was literally insane.

i wasn't sure if you were asking for both of them at the same time or individual fics, but per our guidelines, we currently don't write multi-member stuff, so i just wrote you two separate fics, one for each. i really hope you like them!!

❤️ abbie & courtney

-------------------

pairing: changbin x afab!reader

genre: smut, 18+ (minors dni)

length: 745

warnings: profanity, sexual/suggestive content, spitting (in da pussy), unprotected sex (wrap before you tap), slight name calling, praise, cream pie, afab reader, nsfw 18+ (minors dni)

a/n: it was going to be complicated to put both fics in the same answer because of warnings and tags and such, so this is the changbin one. if you want to read the minho one, click here.

“fuck, you take me so good, baby,” changbin groans as he fucks you from behind, shoving you further into the mattress with each thrust. 

you try to respond, but you choke on the words when he presses down slightly on your lower back to tilt your hips further, changing the angle, so you suddenly feel him so much deeper. a strangled moan leaves you as you bury your face into the pillow, fists gripping the sheets next to it so hard your knuckles turn white. 

he keeps a relentless pace, fucking you fast and hard, his cock hitting that spot deep inside of you perfectly with every movement. one of his hands slides up the length of your back, and his fingers tangle tightly into your hair, pulling your head up from the pillow and tipping it slightly.

“there, that’s better. i want to see your face when i make you cum.” 

his other hand quickly snakes around your hip and finds your clit, stroking it in rhythm with his thrusts. the added sensation is too much, and it takes less than a minute before you unravel, your pussy violently squeezing his cock as release barrels through you. pure, white hot pleasure courses through your veins, and an endless stream of incoherent curses and moans pour from your lips.

suddenly he pulls out, and your cry of pleasure morphs into a whine at the sudden loss of contact mid-orgasm. 

you don’t even have time to form an actual complaint before you feel his hands come up to grab your ass. his hands pull, spreading you slightly, so he can watch the way you clench around nothing as you ride out the tail end of your orgasm. 

“mmm, so pretty,” he murmurs while leaning in closer. for a moment he doesn’t say anything else, but then you hear him spit. 

you jolt slightly when you feel it hit your pussy, splattering across your now oversensitive clit and causing shockwaves to ripple through your core. the combination of the sound and the intense sensation overwhelms you, sending a bolt of pure heat through your veins. you feel yourself getting even wetter, both from his saliva and from the fresh arousal burning through you. 

“oh, you like that do you?” he asks, noticing your reaction. he leans in again, so close you can feel his breath brush against your folds and your body tenses in anticipation. you jolt even more than the first time when he spits on you again, and you hear him chuckle darkly. “that’s my good, filthy girl.”

you feel some of your wetness start to drip down the inside of your thigh and changbin uses his thumb to collect it before swiping it up through your folds and running it across your clit. he slowly circles you for a moment, mixing his spit and your juices together, drawing out a few more aftershocks from you.

“yes, so very pretty.”

another moment of silence falls across the room with only the sound of your breathing filling it before you feel his hands slide back to your hips. you barely have a moment of warning before he fills you once more. a loud moan escapes you as the entire experience is now heightened by your recent orgasm and extra sensitive pussy. he quickly resumes his earlier pace, pulling out almost completely with every thrust before slamming all the way to the hilt again.

it doesn’t take much of this relentless fucking before his hips start to stutter, and grunts and groans flow freely from his throat. his hand fumbles as he reaches around you once more, desperate to make you fall apart with him. with the overwhelming feeling of him deeply fucking your oversensitive pussy, all it takes is a few flicks of his thumb and a light pinch to your clit, and you're cumming again, only seconds before you feel his cock start to pulse inside of you. 

he pushes you further into the mattress as he cums, fitting your hips as close together as he possibly can like he’s trying to mold your two bodies into one. he stops moving as release flows through him, instead letting the pulsing of your walls draw every ounce of pleasure from his cock. 

after you both come down from your highs, several moments pass with the two of you still fused together before he finally pulls out and collapses onto the bed next to you. wrapping his arms around you, he drags you into his chest, peppering a few soft kisses along your hairline before you both drift off to sleep.

[bbyquokka]

2:53 pm (scb)

genre: mafia au, timestamp, smut — 18+ is strongly advised!

warnings: gender neutral reader, established relationship, mafia boss ! changbin, unprotected sex, creampie, biting–lmk if i missed any!

words: 0.9k ~ (927)

a/n: it's mine and changbin's birthday today so here is a little something to celebrate with it also being a small self indulgent gift to myself :)

♡ m.list — ♡ you can also read it on my ao3

dont repost. dont translate. minors, ageless & default blogs; dni! feedback and reblogs are highly advised and appreciated!

“fuck you feel so good around me. you're sucking me in so well. so warm.. gosh i love it so much.” the man above you grunts and groans as he thrusts his hips into you with such power and strength, your body shifts and rocks in time with the motion.

you grip onto his biceps to stable yourself, the muscles flexing underneath your fingers. your back against the hardwood of the desk. the desk supplies and pieces of paper scattered on the floor indicating that neither of you could wait. 

his dress pants around his ankles along with his underwear. his white button shirt opened showing his soft tummy, happy trail and a neck tattoo. sleeves rolled up to his elbows showing off his heavily tattooed arms–the design of a dragon being the most prominent. his slicked back hair tousled from you tugging and pulling at the strands.

“jesus changbin!” you groan “missed me much?”

“being away from you is painful. having to surround myself with unintelligent beings for weeks has been insufferable! all because they can't control their anger and when i say no, it apparently means yes to them.” his pace and power increasing as he rambles on about how incompetent his subordinates are.

how they fail to follow his instructions and wreak havoc in the city. being head boss of a very well known mafia gang is hard work for him so it's not unusual for him to take his aggression out on you–rather that than him killing someone in pure rage.

at first glance, changbin seems scary. his overpowering dominant aura is enough to send the world's strongest man shrinking and cowering into a corner. however, looks can be deceiving. changbin has a big heart and even though he is head boss of the gang (the title of boss being passed down to him once his father passed) and isn't afraid to kill,  he does unexpected kind and caring things that no one expects from a mafia boss.

some people have even named him the modern robin hood. 

your muscles scream and body twists as you squeeze his tattooed arms. changbin grips onto your hips, his fingers sinking into your skin that leave behind purple marks. he stops for a brief second, grabbing your legs and hoisting them up and over his shoulders.

the new position allows him to touch untouched territory. to stroke your insides and rearrange them with his thick cock. your eyes close slowly, mouth agape as empty moans roll from your tongue.

changbin sinks his teeth into the flesh of your calf. it's enough pressure to leave behind faint marks but not enough to pierce the skin. he holds your legs close to his body as he drives his penis in and out. sweaty skin slapping against one another, changbin panting and moaning as he kicks his head back and exposes his tattooed neck.

“so good.. fuck! i love how you make me feel. how warm you are around my cock. i love watching you squirm and tears roll down those pretty cheeks due to you being so overwhelmed.” he babbles as he stares at you.

you swallow and whimper as shivers shoot up your spine. changbin's hungry gaze pierces straight through you, making you feel weak and incapable of doing basic human things.

changbin lets go of your legs before pulling out. he gently turns you around, your hands planted on the wooden desk and legs spread. 

changbin licks his lips as he pumps himself, gazing and admiring you from behind. the back of your legs and ass cheeks red raw from the constant slapping, skin slick with sweat. love bites on your neck and hair dishevelled. he gives his cock a few more pumps before laughing as you sway your hips side to side and whine impatiently.

“yes yes.” he chuckles. his hot palm pressing flat on your lower back above your ass as he pushes himself back inside. he groans loudly, a groan that's from deep within his chest as his shaft becomes encapsulated by that warmth he loves and is addicted to.

he resumes his powerful and fast thrusts from earlier, eyes glancing at the way your ass cheeks ripple. with both hands, he grips onto your shoulders as he pounds into you. 

“fuck.. feels good!” you manage to say between your laboured breaths and moans. “you feel so good, binnie. more! want more!”

changbin grunts as a response. he wraps his strong arms around your chest and stomach, gently pulling you up enough so it's back to chest. you tilt your head to the side, lips meeting his in a sloppy and saliva filled kiss.

from the sheer force and overwhelming amount of pleasure you both feel, you both reach climax around the same time. changbin grunting and squeezing his eyes shut as he releases inside of you. his muscles shaking and dick twitching with each release. he holds you close, squeezing you tight to the point of air leaving your lungs.

his hot cum coating your insides causes you to climax with him. body shaking, mind fuzzy and legs buckling and giving up. you fall to the floor slowly with changbin still inside you, head hanging low as you both pant and come down from your highs.

you look up at changbin as he looks at you which causes you both to laugh softly. he kisses your sweaty forehead gently, deciding to kiss every inch of your face before finally kissing your lips.

“love you yn. you make me feel alive.”

tags (open): @sstarryoong ; @septicrebel ; @alyszaen ; @writerracha ; @hyunluvxo ; @aestheticsluut ; @xcookiemonsteer ; @telesvng ; @oshimee ; @fairylouist

[3raaaachachacha]

3:15 pm

Seo Changbin x female reader / 645 words / fluff / smut

Warnings: unprotected sex, hooking up with a stranger, cursing

Disclaimer: contains 18+ content; minors do not interact 

⊱ ──────────────────────── ⊰

“May I take a seat here?" A masculine voice asked from beside you as you set your book on the table to look at him.

Your eyes met a muscular, somewhat short man, who was handsome with shaggy dark brown hair. You took a quick look around the library and noticed that it was extremely busy, which was why he would have asked in the first place. You shyly nodded at the male before moving over to let him sit next to you.

"Thank you. I'm Changbin by the way," He chimed as he extended his hand for you to shake.

You smiled at the attractive male before placing your hand in his, "Y/N."

Who knew that you'd have so much in common with a stranger? Realizing the library was no longer suitable, you headed to a cafe down the road and for hours, you talked about random topics, finding out you both had similar interests. You didn’t miss the glances he sent you, the way his eyes stared at you a little longer, or the flirtatious comments he let slip from his mouth.

You weren’t sure what confidence came over you or how the thought even crossed your mind. One minute you were at the cafe near your apartment drinking coffee with a stranger and the next, he was in your apartment on top of you, hands roaming your naked body as his cock slowly thrusted into you.

"Shit," You mumbled, hands gripping the sheets tightly, "You're so big."

Changbin couldn't help but chuckle at your flustered state as his hands moved down to push your legs over his shoulders, "I don't usually do this," He stated, wanting to make a point that he wasn't one of those fuck boys, "But, fuck, there’s just something about you. I couldn't help myself."

Nodding frantically while whimpering loudly, your eyes found him and you were met with him staring intently into yours. He was right, you also weren't the type of person who just hooked up with anyone, but something about Changbin caught your eye, still unsure what.

Unable to form a coherent sentence from the way he was fucking you, you moaned loudly, signaling to him you were close. Changbin didn't need words, he could tell from the way your walls clenched around his cock that you were about to cum.

"Your pussy was made for me, so tight and pretty. Want to cum already baby?" He teased with a grin, his free hand pinching at your pierced nipples, something that also shocked him.

"Can I?" You asked without thinking and Changbin swore he was going to cum then and there after hearing you ask for permission.

"Fuck," He groaned breathlessly as his pace unconsciously increased, "Fuck yes, baby. You can cum. Cum all over my cock like a good girl."

Humming in acknowledgment, you held onto Changbin tightly, kissing his soft lips. He groaned from the feeling of your pulsing core, tightening around his cock as he came inside of you. 

When the two of you calmed down from your high, you laid there side by side, trying to comprehend what just happened. No one said anything, but thankfully, it wasn't awkward. You could tell that he wanted to say something but stopped each time. When he did gain the courage to speak up, you cut him off with a kiss, your body pressed against him as he moved his hands to steady your waist.

"Fuck, I don’t usually do this either, but you’re so addicting," You confessed to his statement earlier, "And right now, I want to fuck you again."

"I like the sound of that," He murmured against your lips, changing position so you were beneath him, "Fuck, I can’t wait to take you on the ride of your life," He teased, making you chuckle slightly before reattaching your lips to his.

⊱ ──────────────────────── ⊰

- Admin 🌶️

[stayconnecteed]

❛⠀INTERLUDE⠀—⠀an intervening period of time; an interval . . .

summary: small space where to keep track of all the drabbles written from a moment in time. of my milestone events, but also all those inspired by little instances in my life that remind me of stray kids. the majority of them have a trace of a cosy feeling. please, enjoy!

SEE MORE.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀masterlist.⠀⠀taglist.

🌆⠀⠀sunrise⠀⠀—⠀⠀inner voices that cease and stay.

⠀⠀⠀❛ 09 : 37 ❜⠀﹙ lee felix ﹚⠀⠀fluff / humor, 948 words

🌇⠀⠀noon⠀⠀—⠀⠀you see daydreams in my eyes.

⠀⠀⠀none yet.

🏙️⠀⠀sunset⠀⠀—⠀⠀golden light spilled in the room.

⠀⠀⠀❛ 16 : 22 ❜⠀﹙ kim seungmin ﹚⠀⠀fluff, 808 words ⠀⠀⠀❛ 17 : 29 ❜⠀﹙ han jisung ﹚⠀⠀fluff, 993 words ⠀⠀⠀❛ 18 : 40 ❜⠀﹙ bang chan ﹚⠀⠀fluff, 950 words ⠀⠀⠀❛ 18 : 45 ❜⠀﹙ seo changbin ﹚⠀⠀hurt / comfort, tbd

🌃⠀⠀midnight⠀⠀—⠀⠀let's say long live our memories.

⠀⠀⠀❛ 22 : 13 ❜⠀﹙ han jisung ﹚⠀⠀fluff, 999 words ⠀⠀⠀❛ 23 : 11 ❜⠀﹙ hwang hyunjin ﹚⠀⠀angst / fluff, tbd ⠀⠀⠀❛ 23 : 17 ❜⠀﹙ lee felix ﹚⠀⠀fluff, 891 words

© stayconnecteed 2024

[hansols-yoda-boxers]

Oct 16th [Changbin + Cockwarming]

[9:44] You let out a heavy sigh as you flopped down on your bed. It was late by the time you got home and you’d told Changbin to go ahead and eat and not worry about waiting up. It was rare that you got home after him but it happened from time to time. And fairly enough, you knew he would be tired. Still, he was awake, scrolling through his phone as if ready to go to bed when you fell into bed next to him.

“Rough day, love?” You could hear his pout despite being face down in your pillows. You let out a grunt in response and he shifted closer. You felt his hand on your back, starting to rub soothing circles to relax you. You reached out a hand finding him and squeezing his thigh in a quiet thank you. You stayed like that for a while, moving your head a little so you could breathe but keeping your eyes closed while Changbin rubbed your back. He eventually moved to lay beside you, peppering kisses on your shoulder while he comforted you.

“I shouldn’t be keeping you up,” you mumbled tiredly.

“I was already up,” he responded.

“Were you waiting for me?” You questioned.

“Don’t worry about that.”

“You were, weren’t you.”

Changbin wiggled a little closer and you opened your sleepy eyes to see his cute pout. “I don’t like falling asleep until you’re beside me.”

You sighed. “You shouldn’t let that keep you up.”

He shook his head. “I’d rather be tired tomorrow and know that you’re safe than fall asleep and have something happen to you.”

You finally shifted onto your side, looking at him properly. Changbin took the opportunity to press closer to you, wrapping an arm around your waist to hold you close. “Babe, nothing is going to happen to me.”

“It could,” he said.

“And what would you do if it did?” You questioned.

Changbin gave you an incredulous look, before puffing out his chest. “What do you mean “what would you do?” I’d go to you and save you of course!”

“Babe, if something happens do you think I’ll be able to text you?” You snorted.

Changbin gave you another pout. “You have to! Otherwise how will I save you?”

A smile broke out across your lips. “You are the sweetest boyfriend ever,” you cooed.

“Of course I am,” he huffed. You wrapped your arms around him, snuggling into his chest and hooking a leg over his hip to pull him flush against you.

“You can’t fall asleep without me, huh?” You giggled.

“Maybe,” He mumbled. “But I really would save you.”

“I don’t doubt it,” you said, pressing a soft kiss to his neck, and then another. There was no intention in it, you simply wanted to be closer to him. He ran his hands up and down your back soothingly, humming contentedly at the feeling of your kisses. Your lips found their way slowly up his skin, feeling his throat vibrate with each hum he let out. You kissed at his jaw and then his cheek until you were at the corner of his lips.

He grinned against your mouth. “I thought you were tired.”

“I am,” you insisted. “Just want to be close to you.”

Changbin pulled back and you whined. He gave you a thoughtful look, not letting you pull him back in right in before giving you a small, sleepy smile. As you took in his face you could see how sleepy he clearly was. Even if it was his choice you felt bad for keeping him up so late, knowing that he was busy tomorrow. 

“I should let you sleep,” you frowned.

“Why don’t we get closer first?” He hummed. His fingers played with the hem of your shirt as he pulled you back in. He kissed you, slow and sweet and deliberate as his fingers started to push your shirt up. You let him get it up over your chest before breaking the kiss to slip out of it and motioning for him to take off his shirt too. He did just that while you undid your bra and kicked off your jeans and underwear. Changbin only got a few moments to admire your bare form before you snatched his shirt, throwing it on and diving under the covers.

“I’ve been wearing that all day,” he chuckled. 

That’s what makes it perfect,” you giggled. Changbin rolled his eyes but the fondness in his smile was unmistakable as he kicked off his sweats, just left in his boxers as he crawled under the blankets with you. He pressed his body close to yours, sharing heat under the covers. His lips found yours again, kissing you nice and slow. He coaxed your leg up over his hip again and you complied. Gently, he trailed his fingertips along your inner thigh and you finally caught onto what he was thinking.

A sigh left your lips as his fingers drew slowly through your core and started to move in slow circles over your clit.

Sparks of pleasure started to ignite in your core. Despite your weariness and his you craved his touch, craved being close to him and feeling him as much as you could. Even in his tired state he was awake, wanting to make sure you were home safe and sound before he slept. Even now, he held you close, making your body feel so good with his fingers very late in the evening. As your arousal rose so did a well of emotions that had you pulling away from the kiss and hiding your face in his chest. He slipped his hand up under your shirt and rubbed your back with his free hand while his other moved with the perfect pressure just the way you liked on your clit.

You fought to keep yourself from crying while he treated you with the utmost gentleness and love, something you craved after such a long and tiring day. You chalked it up to being over-exhausted, that’s why your emotions were so quickly getting out of hand. You could at least play off your breathing as getting more turned on but the sniffle was much harder to hide.

“Love? You okay?” There was so much concern in his voice as he slowed his movements.

You, however, did not want him stopping. You gripped his wrist tightly, hiding your face lest he try to move you to see you. “I’m okay. Keeping going.” Your voice did you no favours.

“What’s wrong?” Trying to move back and see you but you kept yourself glued to him.

“It’s really nothing.” You said quickly, wiggling your hips and trying to get him to keep going and cursing yourself for ruining the perfect moment.

“I’m not con-”

“I just love you a lot,” you sighed, feeling the embarrassment wash over you at the admission.

“E-Eh?”

“I love you a lot. I got caught up thinking about how I love you and how much you love me and it made me cry,” you mumbled. “Can you keep going now?”

Changbin let out a laugh before kissing your head. “Well alright then,” there was something just a touch more smug in his tone but it didn’t matter seconds later as he slid a finger into your heat.

You moaned against his skin, trying to push all pesky thoughts from your mind and just enjoy being close to him. He moved slowly, curling his finger and thrusting into you slowly before adding a second. You sighed at the slight stretch, pressing a few stray kisses to his neck before snuggling against him.

“Feels good,” you moaned.

“Only the best for you, love,” he assured, keeping his movements gentle even if a little faster. 

Eventually you shifted your face back up to kiss him again. You let time flow past you both as you got lost in the sleepy, slow kisses and each other’s warmth. His fingers kept up their ministrations until they moved with ease and your core was dripping from all of the slow, sweet attention.

It was only then that your sleepy brain thought to touch him. You slipped a hand between your body, taking in his groan into your mouth as you palmed at his cock, already hard in his boxers. You couldn’t help but smile against his lips at the way playing with you always made him needy. You would never get tired of how him pleasuring you pleasured him.

You pushed his boxers down as best you could and he moved his hand from your core to help you. He pulled back, loving to watch your face when he entered you, intoxicated by the expression you made, the way it etched pleasure across your features. He was slow as he sunk into you, careful to make sure you were comfortable and smiling at the way your eyes fluttered closed and you whimpered at the wave of pleasure that washed through you.

Finally filling you up he pulled your chest flush to his, nose to nose and murmured your name as his arms wrapped around you. You managed to open your eyes and see his own sleepy ones so close to you as you cuddled, soft hair nearly falling into them.

“I love you,” he murmured.

“I love you too,” you replied, more than content with feeling him so close, hands under your shirt and pressed to your skin, cock buried inside you snugly while your fingertips drew lazily over the skin of his back. “Thank you for waiting up for me.”

He kissed your nose. “Thank you for always coming home safe to me.”

[fireboltposts]

Time Stamp : 10pm

You're ill so your tsundere roommate and best friend Minho feeds you

He is like "Ey dude eat fast I can't stay awake all night feeding you" 🙄.

Also when he puts the food in your mouth he is like "Ya take fast my hands are paining 🙄 .

But actually he wants you to be well but his tsundere-ness gets the best of him

He hides the fact that he wants you to eat fast so you can take your medicines and also after finishing the food he plans to have movie night with you in bed 🤭.

[fantastic-bby]

Pairing: Reader x Changbin

Word count: 1271

Genre: Mild angst | Hurt/Comfort-ish

You've spent too long away from your boyfriend that you're exhausted to want to wait any longer. He, on the other hand, wants nothing more than you to come home to.

Masterlist

[23:58]

The air is thick as you stand across from each other. The distance between you feels so close yet so far away as you swallow your tears, lips pursing together repeatedly. At the other side of the kitchen stands Changbin, your boyfriend who you’ve practically been dating long distance from how often he spends working. 

He barely comes home, and with the constant touring, you’ve only seen him three times in the past four months. 

You know that it’s something that you’ve signed up for: dating a professional idol, but you hadn’t realised how taxing it would be on the waiting end as you spend countless nights waiting for the smallest text from Changbin that reminds you why you’re still holding on as much as you are. 

But sometimes, an “I love you” text isn’t enough. And other times, his promise of being home gets cut short whenever work piles up and he ends up crashing in the studio or at the dorms. 

Which leads you to your current situation. 

“You’re just saying that because you’re upset,” Changbin mutters, suitcase in hand and jaw clenched. His beanie has been tossed onto the marble counter out of frustration, hair messy and sticking out in all directions. 

“Changbin, I’m tired—and as much as I know that you’re busy, but I haven’t seen you in months. You live here, but I only ever see you once every month. I try to visit you at the studio to keep you eating, but you kick me out and don’t even end up eating anything that I leave behind. I’ve tried… but I don’t think I can anymore. I’ve spent so many nights here alone, but when I need you most, you’re in another country or you’re ten fucking minutes away not answering my calls.  I-I don’t want to make you choose between work or me, so I’m not even going to make you. Go on tour,” you say with your arms moving about in frustration. 

It makes you feel like the bad guy, but you know that you have your own rights. Changbin hasn’t exactly been the nicest to you in the past few months: constant snapping, kicking you out of studios in front of his friends when he had invited you—simple “I love you”s and “I’m sorry”s aren’t enough for you anymore.   

“Even on days when you’re here, you’re here one night and gone the next. I’ll wake up and you’re gone, and you won’t be back for another few days,” you ignore the way your voice cracks as you look at him.

He realises, in this moment, that he hasn’t been the best boyfriend to you, and he realises his own fault of constantly pushing you away the way he has. 

And work is work, but you’re still Changbin’s home, but he hasn’t exactly been coming back as often as he promised. 

His eyes look around the room frantically as his thoughts race in his head, trying to desperately think of a way to get you to stay. 

When in reality, it’s Changbin who will be making this decision. 

If he walks out of that door now, you won’t be waiting for him anymore. 

He honestly doesn’t even want to go, but Changbin knows that if he misses his flight tonight, he’ll only be causing more problems for the rest of the group and his managers. 

And as Changbin stares at you in your shared home, he realises that work isn’t enough to get him to let you go. 

“I can’t be with someone who can’t even keep their promise of coming home to sleep,” you state. Your foot is down and Changbin swallows thickly. His phone starts ringing on the counter for the third time tonight, the name of his manager flashing on his screen, presumably to try and get him to come downstairs. 

But Changbin declines the call and looks you dead in the eyes.

  “Come on tour with me,” he breathes out shakily. 

You lean back slightly in surprise, but it doesn’t seem to make him falter in his request.

“I-I know I haven’t been the best, but, (Y/n), please. I can’t lose you. I don’t fucking care if I’m late to the airport—I just care that I still have you to come home to.”

He takes a cautionary step forward, gauging your reaction, and from the way you don’t seem to move away or get mad, Changbin slowly approaches you until he’s standing right in front of you.

  “Please. Pack your bags and come with me. I don’t care if they see us, I don’t care if news gets out—fuck—I don’t care what happens. I can’t lose you,” he mutters as he takes your hands in his. “    

“Changbin…”

“I’m not leaving this fucking apartment unless you’re coming with me,” he states, jaw clenched and eyes hardened as he looks into yours. “If you don’t want to, I’m staying.”

You feel your heart cracking by the minute when you see the look in Changbin’s eyes. All of his other priorities have been thrown out the window and all that stands is you. He’s willing to throw everything away for you. 

“Nothing in this world could compare to you. I’m not willing to give you up this easily. You’re coming with me or I’m staying. I don’t care if my manager calls again—I’m staying, (Y/n).” 

You feel your bottom lip starting to tremble as the emotions finally break free, tears pouring down your face freely at the realisation that Changbin would, quite literally, do anything for you. 

“I’m tired of not being with you. I’m tired of looking at our phone bill and seeing how expensive it is because that just means that I’ve spent more time calling you from other countries instead of being in bed with you just like I was supposed to. I-I don’t want you to keep waiting—I want you to have me now,” Changbin continues. His thumbs run over the skin of your knuckles and his forehead pressed against yours. “Nothing in this world shines as bright as you, baby.”

You hear his phone starting to ring once again but Changbin only presses himself further into you. 

“I’m not getting into that car unless you’re coming with me. I can’t lose you. You’re everything to me. I’ll talk about it with my managers—I’ll get you on every plane I get on, I’ll get you in every hotel I’m in—I don’t fucking care. I’ll take you everywhere with me. Please, give me one more chance.” 

You only cry more when his arms wrap around you. How are you supposed to say no to him? It’s not like you could easily break up with him either. The only problem you had was the fact that you hadn’t seen him in so long that it was putting you in a lot of stress. 

But now, having Changbin wrap his arms around you as he begs you to follow him on tour… 

You can’t help but remember why you had waited for him all this time. You raise your hands to meekly return the hug, crying against his sweater as you do.. 

“Y-You can come with me. We’ll be together all the time—we’ll see everything together,” Changbin continues to whisper against you. His grip tightens, “please, (Y/n). Just one more chance.”

You don’t even think of your options as your own hands grip the back of his sweater tightly and you bury your face in his shoulder. 

You just know that you’re willing to keep trying if you know Changbin will be there.

“Okay.”

[softstraykidshours]

[2:26 pm] "when i said hold on tight, i didn't mean choke me to death."

you feel changbin's back rumble against your chest as he laughs at you, and you giggle slightly before loosening your grip around his neck.

a light summer rain had started this afternoon, and you and changbin had decided to go for a short hike in order to enjoy the weather. unfortunately, on the way back you slipped and twisted your ankle. you told him you would be fine to make it home, but changbin refused to listen, insisting on giving you a piggyback ride the entire way back. 

despite the sore ankle, it ended up being really fun. every time he wanted to direct your attention somewhere, he'd give your leg a gentle squeeze and nod towards whatever he found interesting. you realized that you much prefer the view from up on his back than on the ground. 

however, the piggyback ride quickly lost its appeal when he started taking you up the stairs to your apartment. every step up made you feel like you were tipping backwards. hence, why you inadvertently started strangling him with your tight grip. 

"sorry," you reply sheepishly after releasing your hold and allowing him to breathe again. "i just don't want to fall."

"you think i would drop you?!" he shouts with faux exasperation. he pauses his ascent up the stairs to swing his body slightly while looking over his shoulder at you with a dramatic shocked expression on his face. the movement throws off your balance again, and you feel like you're going to fall down the stairs. 

"no!" you squeal, instinctively tightening your arms and legs around him again. "the stairs just scare me from up here, i know you would never drop me!" 

"yeah sure...whatever you say," he stomps the rest of the way up the stairs pretending to pout. he spends the next hour or so grumbling to himself that you don't think he's strong enough while you constantly argue and try to reassure him that you think he's the strongest man you know. 

[neo-shitty]

safety pin — s.cb

description. just because changbin knows how to put away a knife doesn’t change the fact that he knows how to wield one.

pairings. seo changbin x gender-neutral reader

genre. hurt/comfort, angst, bestfriends!au

warnings. vague implications of bullying, swearing, open-ended? cliffhanger?

word count. 2.5k

notes. this is for the bullied bullies—the ones who were never nice enough to say they didn’t deserve what they got. there are only two ways our lives could go: change for the better or get fucking worse. i hope we’re all moving towards the former. 

You remember how it feels like to drown in open air. The tightening in your chest, ribcage brushing against dried out lungs. The panicked beating of the heart, the physical act of breathing not feeding oxygen into your system. Help me.

It happened at the back of a noisy classroom, by the far corner where it was darker and quieter than the rest of the room. It wasn’t too far, but it was separated enough from the small circles of people that filled the room with boisterous laughter and chatter static. 

Silence was violent, it gave way to the voices in your head. On most days, they were nothing but murmurs in the back of your mind, as if the cog that controlled their volume was free of rust and turned to the lowest notch. Other days, they got to you but you tried your best to push through. Today, they were nearly impossible to shrug off, amplified by people who sat at the other side of the room.

You could see the rise and fall of your chest, feel your warm breath brush the back of your hand, but you couldn’t feel the air in your system—where it was needed most. Your head felt lighter with every second that passed and your uneven breaths did little to no help to the lack of oxygen in your head. 

Time has passed and things have changed. The ghosts from your past could no longer hurt you now. It was what you wanted to tell yourself. But the wounds they left behind haven’t healed into scars quite yet. They were sealed shut in fragile seams that didn’t take much to rip back open. Without agitation, they didn’t hurt as much as they used to, yet that didn’t mean that they no longer did. You were sure they’d long forgotten about the words they’d left and they pranced around innocently like their words weren’t drilled into the back of your head. You could still hear them mocking you, their laughter reverberating on the walls of your mind whenever you glanced at a mirror.

But you weren’t innocent, no. You spat poison at others just as much as it was spat on you, maybe even more. It was a vicious cycle of cruel words you never really meant, just things you said out of necessity to have the final clap-back—the one that made everyone shut up. Even that backfired eventually, like all things did in terms of karma. You got a taste of your own medicine and rendered helpless at the other end of the knife. 

It took you a while to build yourself up again and for months you thought you’ve healed and let go. It took one glance in their direction to send you back in time, to a headspace you thought you’ve overcome and moved on from. And for the first time in months, you were scared again. 

Everything was starting to go well for you again. You’ve started anew, with a clean slate you didn’t want to smear any time soon. The image of you in their heads no longer existed, you’ve tried to change completely. But it didn’t mean that it never existed. Whoever they knew was still you, it still lived in their minds as a memory no matter how you tried to erase it. There was no running from who you once were. They had the upper hand, they had the claim of being on the victim’s end. It only took a few mouths to turn the people you held close against you for the second time around.

The heaviness shackled you down to your seat. Getting away was hopeless with the way your limbs were shaking. They paid you no heed, but you could feel their eyes dart to you occasionally—waiting for a moment to strike a conversation just for old times sake. You weren’t ready for such casualties. So you tried to stay focused on the sole thing that kept you from having to interact with anyone else. You tapped away on your phone, fingers trembling as you typed in a ‘get me out of here’ to the nearest contact, clicked send and went on to distract yourself with whatever your phone had to offer. Seconds felt like hours confined in the same room where you were suffocating.

Yet you kept your face stoic, as if the alarms in your head weren’t going off one after the other. Your leg bounced restlessly, fingers fidgeting with no other purpose but to hold your phone in place. The looming presence inches closer, overwhelming you like a wave crashing over you and pulling you beneath the surface. You sank deeper and deeper and deeper.

“_____?”

Amidst the chorus in your head, you heard a voice break through, barely. You snapped back into focus, slowly looking up from your mindless phone browsing to find the voice’s owner. Across the room, Changbin was scanning the room for you—eyes darting from one row after the other until he finally found you at the far back.

For a fraction of a moment, his eyes softened when they met yours. He raised an arm to wave you over. “Let’s go.” 

The room blurred around you as Changbin became your sole focal point. You gave him a small nod in acknowledgment, sweeping your bag off the armchair before you crossed what had been an impossible space seconds ago. You could feel eyes boring holes on your back as you walked away, like predators stalking prey they couldn’t wait to gnaw on. You were anxious, thinking that they’d call out your name and you’d be forced to face them. What would happen then? Would you be able to defend yourself like you rehearsed a hundred times before? But you reached Changbin with no interruptions, slipping out of the classroom right behind him.

Finally, air. 

You allowed yourself a sigh when you made it out. The heaviness on your chest wasn’t entirely gone but waning with every step further. The hallways were wide, quiet, and empty, as they always were on Friday morning. Enormous windows lined the walls opposite to the classroom doors, allowing the autumn breeze to sweep down the floor.

Changbin walked quietly beside you, eyebrows furrowed and mouth twisted into a seemingly permanent frown. Only when he noticed you looking did he decide to break the silence between the both of you. “What were they doing here?” he spat, voice laced with irritation but his eyes were gentle when they looked over. You only shrugged in reply. “Are you okay?” he asked.

It was a hard question to answer given the circumstances. But for now, your thoughts have gone quiet ever since you walked out the room. Having changbin around made you feel more safe and secure. “I am now,” you muttered honestly. “That was fast though. Did you dash for the room the second you got my text?”

He frowned before cocking an eyebrow at you, “What text?”

You fished your phone out of your pocket. “The one I sent about getting me...” you trailed off when you saw the red exclamation point beside your latest message. Your call for help remained unsent.

“What text?” he repeated, peeking at your phone screen.

“How did you know?” 

Changbin stopped a few steps ahead when he noticed you were no longer following. The gentle breeze picks up and gusts down the hallway to fill in for the silence that had fallen you. His eyes narrow, eyebrows furrowed, “I thought I saw them earlier and then I tried to find you before they did,” he answered. “Guess I was a little too late? I’m sorry.”

You shook your head. “Don’t be. I owe you one.”

“Don’t mention it.” 

That hadn’t been the last time Changbin got you out of a tight pinch, but it was the one that stuck with you most. Months have passed since then yet the memory resurfaced with crystal clear definition as if it had happened only a week ago. It was only one of the memories that you recalled fondly as the town blurred past you on the drive home.

Beside you, Changbin kept his eyes on the road, humming softly to the song playing through the radio. You’ve long given up your attempts to spark a conversation, exhausted from being out the entire day. You knew he hated silence just as much as you did and you hoped the music and your (awake) company would be enough to help him drown out his anxieties for the next day. The car grew quieter with every person he dropped off until he was left with only you—the last stop.

He slowed the car down as he made the turn for your street. You could faintly recall his disbelief when he first drove you home, unable to believe that such a peaceful neighborhood could exist in the bustling city. The quiet stood in stark contrast to his own street and he took the time to breathe in the tranquility, it might be the last of it that he’d be getting in the next few months. 

Changbin parked the car by the vacant lot beside your house, facing west where the sun was slowly setting behind the mountains in the distance. Throughout your friendship, you both had your fair share of comfortable silences—be it across each other at a coffee shop downtown as you both tried making sense out of the notes you scribbled down in class or inside the comfort of his car as you watched the sun set, like today. Most of your time together was spent laughing. 

He was leaving for college the next day and you were lucky enough to be a part of his last day in town. It felt like the past two years passed in the blink of an eye. One moment you were still cramming a semester-worth of knowledge in your brain on the night before exams and the next moment you were having half-drunk conversations as you stared into the inky black sky full of stars. Changbin was so much more than just the academic prodigy who happened to sit on the chair next to yours in Math class. He started novels at the same time you did just to see who was the faster reader. He sat through the most boring of lectures with you, gladly lending you one of his earphones so you could listen to the same song together as you ignored the same useless ‘teacher’. He swapped wallets with you in an attempt to save money; though awfully unsuccessful you got a good laugh out of it. 

When you met in junior year, neither of you had clean slates. Your names were both tainted with mistakes from your pasts, permanently smeared as if your actions were impossible to grow out of. You were both beaten down and broken enough to not let your guards down so easily. Back then, wounds from your past were still healing and you knew the risks of befriending someone perfectly capable of wielding a dagger and inflicting the same damage you’ve suffered in the past.

But he showed you nothing but kindness; bluntness with the best intentions, understanding beyond what you thought you deserved. Changbin knew what to say and when to say it, knew what to do to get misunderstandings fixed without blowing them out of proportion. You were difficult and so was he. Maybe that was how he knew how to handle you, maybe that was how your friendship worked. You both heard what past ghosts had to say about the other yet you took it upon each other to see for yourselves if they were true. Either they were lying about him or the person they had in mind no longer existed. The same might have been true for you too.

He always tried to see the good in you, believing that what you needed was a shot at redemption, a restart. He knew the bad things you did, looked past them when he saw that you were no longer the person you were back then. You were worth saving, no matter how your mind managed to convince you otherwise. You wouldn’t call him your savior though, you did a lot of mending on your own but it was great to have someone to tell you not to be too hard on yourself.

“So,” he muttered quietly, “when are you getting out of the car?”

“Fuck you.” Changbin howls in laughter the second your fist hits his arm. You think it hurt your knuckles more than it did him but you try not to show it. The car fills with laughter, both his and yours, then dies—preserved only in memory. “I guess this is goodbye.”

“God damn it, ______. You’re making it seem like I’m not coming back.”

“Good riddance.” He’s looking over you now, unsure if he was growing impatient with every second you were stalling or wasting empty minutes for a bit more time with you. You never figured that out and you never got to ask him. “I’ll miss you though,” you finally let slip, “a lot more than I emotionally prepared myself to.”

“I’ll miss you too, kiddo.”

A few more quiet glances and a squeeze excused as a hug later, you’re out of his car and waving him off. He honks then drives away. And he hasn’t even disappeared down the road but you were already thinking of next times and future promises to be fulfilled when he came back. There were drives to make, countries to see, seas to cross—all of which were waiting at the end of the 4-year wait left of your educational journey. Somehow, you were convinced that the few short years you’ve known him were enough to reassure you the friendship would last.

It didn’t. 

Some distances were just too far, and some changes were too drastic to ignore. Somewhere in between the four years away, Changbin turned into the very same monster the ghosts said he was. Or maybe there was never anything to turn into when he had always been that way, just better at hiding it. A part of you always saw it coming; a twin of your own doubt on yourself projected on someone who had the same tendencies you did. It was so much easier to revert back to old ways than to change into a new leaf, the familiarity of previous habits almost too easy to fall back into. 

You wanted to deny it, accuse other parties of making stories, because your bias always rested with the one you knew better. But the actions were inexcusable and when it came to picking sides, you winded up somewhere in the god-awful middle—acknowledging the affected yet inherently incapable of holding the perpetrator fully accountable. Because how could you, when he turned a blind eye to your own actions? Why couldn’t you do the same? Why won’t you do the same for him? 

You still remembered him from that Friday years ago; saving grace to you. But it was just a split-second in the long reel of life. Maybe what you knew of him was nothing but a facade meant to bury who he really was—an identity built on a mosaic of little good deeds to cover the reeking reality behind it.

© neo-shitty, 2022