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inkdheart17 · 2 years

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Gochi angst:

Oh you thought it was just Vegebul? Lol no I'm here to make everyone cry

He had always been hard to understand. Perhaps it was because he was never human to begin with, or maybe perhaps due to his isolation as a child. She prayed it had nothing to do with his head injury from childhood. Regardless, it was safe to say her husband was an odd one. Even so, she understood most of his actions. Most.

Nothing could prepare her for the news that he would never come back. Not because the miracle wish orbs had failed, but because he himself had refused. Refused. As though returning to her was worthless. Even their son was of little importance, and yet she understood. It was a horrid twist of irony. The first time she understood her husband perfectly was the last time she would hear from him.

There would be no celebration for their second child.

Keeping that last bit of information to herself, thoughts of whether bringing a second child to a fatherless home plagued her mind. Was it a good idea? She still had her father, and everyone knew that her husband had done little in their son's academic life. She had practically raised the boy herself, but she could see her husband's influence in him. His kindness reflected in their son's ebony eyes. The man's overwhelming drive to protect those he loves had their son disobeying her orders every now and again. Even her husband's handsome features were starting to pop out over the years as their son grew. It was painful.

The thought of another boy popped in her head. A tiny version of her husband. Perhaps their child would have her eyes this time, or maybe even look more like her than her husband, but she knew. Deep down she knew that this second child would look like him. Just like their eldest, this child would be a constant reminder of her deceased husband, and oh how that hurt. How painful it was for her to imagine another reminder. Another child just like the man she would never see again.

She hated it.

Not the child. No, she could never hate anything that resembled that man, but the resemblance itself. Perhaps if she had a girl, one that looked like her and had no traces of her husband, perhaps then she could look at her child without an upset stomach. Perhaps only then could she avoid hearing the child ask if she hated them, because the answer would be no. She did not hate her child, their child, but she was deeply wounded by the man they looked like. The man she loved. The man who left her.

She figured she had little room to complain. Had she been faced with the same decision, she knew she would also choose her family's safety over their love. She would rather them hate her than expose them to another monster. Conjured only because she existed. So, he did. He left them to avoid putting them in danger once again. Whether it be due to his insatiable desire for combat, or his mere existence, it was safer for him to leave...and yet she disagreed.

The green alien that was now washing dishes in her kitchen next to her son, smiling as he heard the boy praddle on about his dragon friend, and the alien like her husband, currently living with her best friend who was now a father as well, were proof enough of her husband's influence. Only he could accomplish transforming two of their greatest enemies into family. As a matter of fact, her husband's best friend had been hostile to him when they first met. Most everyone he interacted with had attacked him in one way or another, and yet they had all attended his funeral. Heartbroken to know that the man that changed them would never come back. The glue that had united them was now gone.

A small movement in her stomach caused her to frown. Their second child would never get the chance to meet such a great man. They would hear stories, but it would be the same as hearing stories of a great superhero. Their father would just be some character from the past. Even if time travel was possible, it was a reality far into the future that her best friend was still incapable of achieving. Would their second child be an adult the first time they got to meet their father? Would they even get the chance?

She pressed her palms to her eyes and let out a shuddering breath. She had never agreed with the idea, had abhorred it, but it was so tempting now that she was alone. She had no desire to kill, but she also held no desire for another child. Not without him. Still, as she looked around, she knew she was incapable of destroying anything that came from him. She would hate herself if she ever did, and so she kept her pregnancy. It would be a secret, though, just until she was no longer able to hide it. Just until then, she wanted to forget. She wanted to pretend he had not abandoned her. Just until then.

-----

Her dilema was resolved quickly, and she was appalled at herself for having once thought to end her pregnancy. Seeing the second wave of shocked expressions at the full set of hair that came with the newborn, she could only laugh. Reaching for her child with shaking arms, she held the boy close. Tears of heartbreak and pure bliss burning her eyes as she glanced down at her second boy. An exact replica of her husband. Having lost most of her energy to the labor, she could only sob as she kissed her child. Whispering how much he looked like his father, and how his father would have a silly face if he were to be there. She was sure he would call his son a "little me", and it bubbled another laugh out of her, because he would be right. Their little Goten was a little him, and she would raise him to be just as kind. She would allow him to explore the martial arts his father loved so much, and she would make sure the boy grew up with the extended family his father had collected since he was a child himself. Even that grumpy prince that refused to call her husband by his human name.

-----

It was a bittersweet reality to see her youngest grow up almost identically to his father. Her son was rowdy and kind, and he was surpassing his own barriers with little effort. So young and already he possessed the terrifying ability to go "super". She panicked the first time she saw him transform, but only because she knew what it meant. He was too alike his father when it came to fighting, and she knew he too would one day look for trouble and, with that, would one day find himself in a fight he could not win. However, she decided it was a far away day. With the right preparation and training, perhaps it would be a day where her son would end up badly hurt, yes, but still be alive.

The strangest thing about her youngest, however, was how his relationship with his best friend worked. The two boys were almost mirrors of how their parents interacted. The friendship of their mothers and the rivalry of their fathers. Of course, she and her best friend had a rivalry of their own but, unlike their husbands, they were able to set aside their prides when they had to. Her best friend's husband was notorious for being both unwilling and unable to set aside his pride. Likewise, her son's friend was the last to put aside his pride. Often times her son was the one to cave, but she was happy to know there were still some things he refused to budge on. His morals were high like hers, but his kindness was endless like his father's.

So, to see him now, carried on his father's shoulder, rambling about his latest mischief with his best friend, was a miracle she never expected to witness.

Her husband was laughing as he added his own mischief. Talking about the strange trainings the turtle hermit had him and his best friend doing. Including the time he was denied dinner despite being the real winner of a race. To her embarrassment and absolute joy, the talk had shifted as she saw her husband glance back at her with a soft smile. He was talking about their first date.

It had only been after his miraculous revival. He had learned the hard way that being around his family was far less dangerous than being away from them, and had graciously accepted a second chance to be on Earth. It was the greatest battle to date. One that demanded he unite entirely with the princely warrior that matched him so well. Doubling their strengths and then some. She had been fearful of the whole battle from the beginning, when her sons had to face the magical beast, and even after when she woke up to an empty bed. Her sobs only stopping after her husband had picked her up in his arms after a late night snack. Apologizing and promising he would never choose to leave her again. It was during one of those nights that he spoke to her about his feelings. Unable to do so before he truly understood what he had lost.

She was almost too distracted by his hands, which were rubbing soothing patterns on her back and legs. She had missed his touch terribly, and it was far more than she was accustomed to in the past. It was jarringly obvious that he had missed her as well. He pulled her in close, unwilling to be apart again, and she finally heard a frown in his voice. He never frowned with her. Not in private like this, when it was just them. Not during their intimate sessions did he ever frown, but he did now.

He apologized again for leaving her and their two sons. While she already knew his reasoning, he explained himself again, and then pressed his cheek to her hand. Sighing as he fixed his thoughts. Then, he spoke about their date. About how often he thought back on that day, even as a child. How he had tried to replicate what he felt that day through different sparring matches. Unaware of what had made his match with her that day so different.

At first, he thought it was because she was a girl, but later battles would prove that gender was inconsequential to him. It was also obvious that it had nothing to do with it being a "fresh" battle with someone new, or because he was battling a close friend. He had fought a number of people after. Both strangers and friends alike, but he was never able to feel that same rush of excitement. "Maybe it's because you described it as the most pleasurable thing to do." He had laughed. Still unsure if what he felt was all that different from the rush of adrenaline he always felt with a new challenger, but he was learning. He knew now it was her, and that only she had that effect on him. The prince had once told him about how their people chose their partners, and that was how her husband knew.

She was almost breathless when he admitted the secret to her. What he had seen in her was something she had thought was lost long ago. A strong woman, a fighter capable of raising a family, and a burning spirit he was sure would never give out. His seven year absence definitive proof of that.

By the end of his monologue, they had shifted to where she was in his lap with her back to him. Leaning against him as he played with her hands. His slid down over her stomach and she was surprised to hear a soft growl escape him. He huffed about not being there for her when she really needed him, and apologized for not knowing about the pregnancy, even though he was quick to notice the first time around. She hardly blamed him. He was busy preparing for the fight that would end his life. Although neither of them knew it at the time. He promised he would have preferred to stay with her if he knew, and that gave her solace enough to admit her darkest thoughts from her pregnancy.

That was when he cried. Quietly, behind her. Face buried in the crook of her neck. The only indications of his sadness were the tremble that vibrated her own body, and the warmth that came from the tears that spilled onto her. She had expected him to be furious. Disappointed, even, in knowing what she was almost capable of doing, but not heartbroken. All he could do was curl her into him. Wrapping himself entirely around her as he cried out more apologies and promises to never leave her.

She slid a hand into his hair. Petting him for a moment before guiding him forward. His eyes were far too glossy for the amount of light the pale moon offered. "I'm so sorry, Chi." He cried once more before her lips met his. She swallowed whatever sobs fell out of him after. Shifting in his embrace without breaking their kiss. She was now over him, standing on her knees and cradling his face in her hands. She pulled away with a smile and wiped away his tears before drying her own face.

Touching foreheads, she breathed in his pain before a gentle laugh bubbled out of her. "Just stay with us, Goku. From now on."

He smiled again after that. One hand pushing back the raven hair he loved to play with as he pulled her back down for another kiss.

They laid back down in each other's arms. Eyes puffy from their emotional conversation. She had almost fallen asleep when one more word fell from his lips. One last promise: "always."

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