#churchington | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

leonardalphachurch · 2 years

Text

@redvsbluesecretsanta present for @stickylizardcave! why is it so late? well you see. i am very bad at deadlines. i

you asked for poly blue team but I wasn’t sure who you wanted included in that so I just went with the classic bluet4 with a focus on epsilon/wash and church being over protective. hope you like it!

EDIT: now also available to read on ao3 if you prefer to read stuff there

---

Nothing Wrong

Post-15 Epsilon lives AU.

The boys go on a date to the beach, working through the new relationship dynamics recent events may have caused. Even though it may not be perfect at times, in the end, they know that there really is nothing wrong.

“HEY ASSHOLE, YOU EVER HEARD OF WATCHING WHERE YOU’RE FUCKING GOING?”

“Church.”

“YOU’RE JUST GONNA KEEP WALKING, HUH? I KNOW YOU HEAR ME MOTHERFUCKER!”

“Church.”

“OH, TOO MUCH OF A COWARD TO EVEN TURN AROUND! YOU EVER HEARD OF FUCKING APOLOGIZING?”

“Epsilon!”

“WHAT!?”

Wash stared at him, completely unamused.

“Wh- don’t get mad at me! That guy’s big ass bag smashed right the fuck into you! He could’ve hurt you!”

“The only thing hurting me is your screechy voice giving me a headache. Sit down.” Wash pulled him down and Church begrudgingly followed, grumbling about how he did not have a screechy voice, you have a screechy voice. The unamused stare turned ever so slightly more amused.

“Who are we yelling at?” Tucker approached the table, tray filled with their food. Wash reached out to grab his share before hesitating. Tucker handed him his fries and milkshake.

“I was not yelling.” They both stared at him, unconvinced. “That loud.”

Tucker laughed, “You were so loud the whole boardwalk could hear you.”

Church looked around. Sure enough, there will still a few people looking their way. He felt a twinge of embarrassment but, whatever, at least people knew not to fucking bother them.

“Some asshole smashed his giant fucking bag directly into Wash’s head.”

“No!” Tucker put his hand to his chest.

“Yes! He could’ve given him a concussion!”

Wash rolled his eyes. “A concussion? Really?”

“We don’t know what was in the bag! It could’ve been fucking, bowling balls!”

“He was carrying around bowling balls.”

“Maybe!”

“To the beach.”

“I don’t- I don’t know what fucking humans are doing these days!”

“No, no,” Tucker interjected, “he’s right, Wash, this is serious.”

“Thank you!”

“Hitting people with bags? This guy sounds like a serious threat.” In one swift motion Tucker removed his sword from his hip and turned it on. “You want me to go take him out?”

Wash laughed. Church glared.

“I don’t know, Tucker,” Wash said, expression now squarely in amused, “guy seems pretty dangerous. Heard he might have bowling balls.”

“Baby, you know I’d face the danger for you.”

“Oh, shove it up your asses.” They both laughed. Whatever.

Tucker turned off his sword and clipped it back into the holder on his hip.

“Where’s Caboose?” Church said, definitely not trying to change the subject.

“Still getting food.” Tucker started unwrapping his burger. “You know he orders like 50 meals. I’m not helping him carry all that shit back.”

“Wow, a real Prince Charming.” Church snarked.

Wash poked at his fries. “Should we wait for him to start?”

“Mmph?” Tucker replied, mouth already full of burger.

“Right.” Wash took a sip of his milkshake.

Church looked around for Caboose. The boardwalk wasn’t too crowded; most people weren’t having beach dates at noon on a Thursday. Even if it was, Caboose wouldn’t have been too hard to find, with his tendency to tower over the crowds. Sure enough, Church was easily able to spot by the food stands, chatting up a confused but amiable looking employee. His tray was already filled with snacks from one stand, eagerly waiting for more. About half of that food would probably end up on the ground during the walk over. Church wondered if that was why he always got so much.

“This is really good.” Wash eagerly sucked up his milkshake.

Tucker looked contemplative as he stared at the straw in Wash’s mouth, but seemed to decide against whatever he was thinking about, instead saying, “Yeah, it’s you’re favorite.”

“Oh.”

“Passionfruit and chocolate. You get it all the time.”

“Right.” Wash took his notepad out of his pocket and started reading through it. “Right,” he nodded slowly. “I guess I have pretty good taste.”

Church frowned.

“Yeah, it's Church’s favorite, too.”

“What? No!” Church recoiled. “That shit’s nasty. I hate chocolate mixed with fruit.”

Tucker laughed.

Wash scoffed. “Well, you don’t have to drink it.”

“Good! I fucking won’t!”

They continued to eat in quiet, for a moment.

Wash read through his notepad again, flipping through a few pages, brow furrowed. “We… come to the beach a lot?” Wash asked.

“Huh? Uh, no?” Tucker replied.

“You said I get this all the time.”

“Oh. No, the burger place, it’s a franchise, there’s one by your house-”

“Right. Right.” Wash flipped through his pages again. “I remember that, that makes a lot more sense.” He jotted something down.

“I wish we went to beach all the time.”

Church’s frown deepened. He looked over to Caboose, hoping to find him finally ready. The employee was helping him carefully balance his tray.

“Hey, Church, you wanna bite?”

“Huh?”

Tucker waved his nearly finished burger in Church’s face.

“Shake’s vanilla, too. Nothin’ fancy.”

“Uh, no.”

“You sure? It’s a good fucking burger.”

Church rolled his eyes. “It’s a burger from a fucking beach food stand, how good can it be.”

“It’s local.”

“It’s fast food. Besides, I’ve had it before.”

Tucker shrugged. “Your loss.”

Wash jotted something down.

“Ummmm.”

The trio looked up to see Caboose walking up to them, tray precariously stacked high. The cheerful looking employee from before was looking slightly less cheerful now, as she walked with Caboose to the table, trying to keep him balanced.

“I think it is actually called ‘fast casual.’ Right Junie?”

“Uhh, sure, please just, oh god.” A burger rolled off the tray and down the boardwalk. Junie watched it go with an expression that screamed ‘I am not being paid enough to do this.’ Church decided he liked her.

“Tucker, for gods sake, help them.”

“Wh- I’m eating!”

“It’s okay!” Caboose made the last few long strides to quickly drop the tray down on the table. To absolutely no one’s surprise, a large soda immediately tipped over. “Oops.”

“CABOOSE!”

“FUCK!”

“Nooooooooo...”

Church’s reflexes immediately grabbed for Wash’s notepad, keeping it dry and out of harm’s way. Tucker wasn’t nearly so lucky, cola coating the remainder of his fries and all over his shirt. Church started cracking up.

Junie looked absolutely crestfallen. “We were. So close.”

“Hey,” Church laughed, “you did better than he usually does.”

“I’ll go… get some napkins.”

Wash started to say she didn’t have to but she was already gone.

“That’s my new friend Junie!” Caboose already stopped caring about the carnage that laid before him, instead starting to shove a burger into his mouth. “She has a cat!”

“Yeah, great, you got soda all over my fucking shirt.” Tucker was wringing his shirt out over the side of the table.

“It’s the beach.” Caboose said simply.

Tucker considered that for a moment before shrugging and taking off his shirt.

Church looked away, flustered at his boyfriend suddenly being shirtless next to him.

Wash had no such shame, staring openly at Tucker’s chest as he sipped his shake.

“Here’s your book.” Church shoved it back at Wash’s face.

“Oh,” Wash took and put it back in his pocket. “Thanks for being quick about it.”

“Well, I’d be the one to restore it if it got messed up anyway. My actions are purely selfish.”

Wash rolled his eyes. “Sure, you don’t care about anyone or anything.”

“Exactly.”

“NAPKINS.” A pile of cotton was dropped onto the table. Junie started to mop up the still uncleaned soda.

“Oh, you really don’t have to—” Wash started.

“THANK YOU!!” Caboose interrupted, punctuating his words with wide hand movements. “Uh oh.”

Another cup of soda took the brunt of Caboose’s backhand. Its precarious lid was no match for the strength at which it was struck to the table. Soda exploded outwards from it, drenching the mountain of once dry napkins into a flattened, sticky mound. Tucker’s bare chest, on proud display, was blasted yet again by the syrupy liquid, with nothing to protect its second barrage of nectar of the day.

“CABOOSE!”

“Oops!”

“Oooooaaaggghhh.” Junie collapsed in despair at witnessing the carnage.

“You really don’t have to clean this.”

Church just put his head in his hands. Sometimes he really didn’t know how he was in love with these idiots.

---

Church stabbed angrily at the sand.

Wash watched him with a judgmental eye. “You need some help with that?”

“I got it.”

“You gotta spin it.” Tucker supplied unhelpfully.

“I got it.”

“I think you should dig the hole deeper.” Caboose chimed in. Tucker muttered something about deep holes under his breath.

“I! Am an advanced military AI! I know how to stick a fucking umbrella in the sand!” To prove his point, Chirch quickly calculated and, in one swift, smooth motion, stabilized the umbrella. “See!”

Tucker laughed and continued undressing.

Wash smirked at him, “Tell Delta I said thanks for the help.”

“Wh- hey!”

“Hi Delta!” Caboose cheerfully waved.

“Delta’s not here! Because I am on a date.” He said, half to Caboose, half to himself.

You’re welcome, Delta logged off. Church mentally flipped him off.

“Bye, Delta!”

“Go, put on your sunscreen, Caboose.”

“Okay!” Caboose started digging in his bag.

A bottle of sunscreen smacked Church in face.

“You wanna use those advanced military AI skills to slather me up?” Tucker said, attempting to be seductive.

“Oh my god.” Church looked over at Tucker and rolled his eyes. The man was wearing what Church had to assume was the tiniest swimsuit he could buy. “Can’t you wear something normal?”

“This is a totally normal swimsuit, you’re just a prude.”

“I am not a prude.”

“Oh yeah? Then come rub me up,” Tucker winked.

Church beaned him with the sunscreen. “Do it yourself. My skin doesn’t absorb that shit, it’d just stick to my hands.”

“Aw, come on, you won’t get your hands all creamy for me?” To punctuate his point, Tucker started to pose in what Church assumed Tucker assumed was a seductive way.

"You sound like Donut." Church was definitely not seduced, he assured himself as he blushed and looked away.

“Give me the sunscreen, I’ll do it.” Dammit, Church hadn’t considered that Wash would be seduced instead.

Tucker shrugged, “As long as I’m getting sunscreened by a beautiful man, I’ll take it.”

Wash scoffed, pulling him down, “Glad to know I’m your second choice.”

Church rolled his eyes and looked away from his partners. Because he was annoyed by Tucker’s shenanigans and definitely not because he would be way too embarrassed to watch his boyfriends rub each other up in public, of course.

“Done!”

Caboose shoved his sunscreen into Church’s hands.

“Why are you giving it to me?”

Caboose just smiled and shrugged, and Church started to suspect that the man was not, in fact, done.

Sure enough, Church adjusted his eyesight to focus on UV and large splotches of Caboose’s body were completely uncovered.

“Caboose! You didn’t get most of you!”

“Oh no,” Caboose replied, with not even a hint of distress, “Guess you will have to do it for me.”

Church glared. “You do this on purpose, you little shit.”

Caboose simply grinned and spread his arms.

Well, whatever. Caboose preferred the spray sunscreen, claiming it made him less oily, so at least Church could put this on.

Church started spraying an even, uniform coating, making sure to cover every inch of Caboose’s skin. Which necessitated a great deal of attention paid to every inch of Caboose’s skin. Caboose wore board shorts, which left more to the imagination that Tucker’s glorified thong, but that didn’t mean there wasn’t still a lot of skin. From his legs, his back, his chest. Church had long since committed it all to memory, but, well, nothing wrong with a refresher.

As Church finished, he gave Caboose a once over to make sure everything was covered. And maybe his gaze lingered a little too long in his partner’s body. And maybe Church was struck by wondering how on Earth he got here, to be dating someone like Caboose, like Tucker and Wash. To be a beach applying sunscreen to his boyfriend as if there was nothing wrong. And, maybe, just maybe, there was nothing wrong.

His gaze moved upwards and caught Caboose’s, who was staring at him expectantly.

Church jumped backwards.

“Uh, there. Now you’re done.”

Caboose took a step forward, reclosing the gap between them.

“Thank you!”

Before Church could realize what was happening, Caboose was pulling him in for a kiss. He tensed at the unexpected contact but quickly relaxed, letting himself fall into Caboose’s soft lips. It was nice. Church forgot sometimes how nice it was when something was nice.

A click of camera shutter went off. Church pulled away to see Tucker aiming his camera at him and Caboose.

Church sputtered. “You can’t just— I didn’t say you could— how dare you— delete that picture.”

“No way man, that was cute as hell.”

Church tried to grab the camera from him but Tucker easily maneuvered it out of his reach. Their struggle quickly turned into a grapple, which quickly turned into full on wrestling in the sand.

Caboose picked up the camera, swiftly abandoned as their fight changed into one of dominance, and sat down next to Wash.

“Do you need to be sunscreened?” Caboose asked, taking pictures of the fight before him.

“Ah, no, I’m all right, I’ve been reapplying every couple of hours.”

“Ohh, that’s smart.”

“Yeah, my skin’s not used to the sun.”

Caboose and Wash watched their two boyfriends wrestle in the sand. It was not a sophisticated fight, nothing like what you’d expect from who are supposed to Chorus’ top operatives. Just two men, desperately trying to get on top of the other.

“It’s impressive that something can be so homoerotic and yet so unsexy,” Wash commented.

“Mm,” Caboose agreed, putting the camera down. “I’m bored.”

Caboose stood up and walked over to the fight. He easily lifted Tucker off of the other man.

“Hey!”

“I want to go in the water now.”

Saying that, Caboose, still holding Tucker, made his way towards the ocean. Tucker protested and struggled but was no match for a Caboose on a mission.

Church wiped himself off. Oh god, he was fucking covered in sand. It was down his pants, up his shirt, caked in his hair. He was pretty sure it was- oh, fucking hell.

“FUCK SAND.” Church yelled in protest as he angrily stomped his way back onto the blanket.

“We’re at the beach. What were you expecting?”

“Fuck you!” Church flipped him off. “It got fucking, inside me.”

“Inside you?”

“In my fucking… mechanisms!” Church gestured towards his torso. “In my wires! Do you know what it’s like to have tiny grain of sands in your fucking bits?”

Wash frowned. “That sounds… awful”

“It is! My life in an unceasing hell of my own fucking creation.”

“Is it dangerous?” Wash looked more concerned than Church had meant to engender.

“Uh,” Church felt a little sheepish. “No, probably not. Just… really uncomfortable.”

“That’s good.”

“Wow. glad you’re happy at my discomfort.”

Wash rolled his eyes. “Epsilon.”

Church huffed. He was allowed to be overdramatic about this. There was sand in his bits.

“Can I help clean in some way?”

Church felt his brain short circuit. The idea of Wash’s hands inside him. Church completely opened up as Wash’s hands delicately cleaned his internals. Brushing against wires and servos. Church’s most vital parts exposed to him. Incredibly vulnerable. Incredibly intimate.

Church felt dirty for even thinking of it in public.

“Um, n-no, I’d go to a, I’d have to get my body professionally cleaned. Not by you. When I’m not in it.”

Wash nodded. “Well, as long as it can get cleaned.”

Church needed to look anywhere but Wash right now. He opted to watch Tucker and Caboose instead.

They’d made it in only a little, water seemingly to cold for them to want go further. Tucker kicked some water up at Caboose, who in turn picked him up and chucked him into the deeper water. Church could hear the yelp from here. Tucker immediately started trying to pull Caboose down with him.

Wash chuckled, and Church turned to see him watching them too.

Wash turned to meet his gaze. “Are you not going in?” He asked.

“I’m a robot, Wash. Me and water don’t exactly agree.”

“Right, right.”

“You?” Church asked, though he already knew the answer.

Wash shook his head. “Not a big fan of the ocean.”

“Yeah.” Church said. “Honestly, kinda surprised you even agreed to a beach date.”

Wash laughed, “Hey, me too. Would love to remember what I was thinking when I did.”

Church looked away. He stared at Tucker and Caboose, not really registering their actions. He felt— no, he didn’t feel anything. Nothing was wrong. He was on a beach date with his boyfriends and there was nothing wrong.

It was silent, between them, for a moment. Then two. Then too long, for the silence to be comfortable, but Church didn’t have anything to say.

Wash was the one to break it. “Is it okay for you to be in the sun like that?”

“What? Yes? I don’t have skin like you do, I don’t burn.”

“I know you don’t burn.”

“The why are you asking—”

“Because you do overheat.”

Church scoffed. He was not overheating… yet. “I am fine. I have a state of the art cooling system”

“Your ‘state of the art cooling system’ overheats when you’re cuddling with Caboose.”

“Caboose runs abnormally hot!”

“Just,” Wash sighed and scooted over, “come under the umbrella.

Church frowned. “I had that perfectly angled to keep you out of the sun for as long as possible.”

“Well, tell Delta thanks for effort, but I’m moving so my boyfriend can sit with me.”

Church huffed, but relented, angrily sitting next to him. “I am perfectly capable of calculating the angle of the sun by myself.” He informed Wash.

Wash put his arm around Church’s waist. “I’m sure you are.”

They sat like that for a moment, looking out at their boys in the water. They were comfortably further out now, and seemed to have turned throwing Tucker into a game. Church didn’t know how they weren’t getting yelled at by some lifeguard yet, but figured that being the saviors of the planet might have some perks.

Wash pulled Church tighter. Church looked over at the other man, and their lips locked. And if Church had to wonder how he got here with Caboose he couldn’t even begin to marvel at how he ended up like this. Like this, with Wash.

With Wash.

Wash pulled away slightly, their faces still so, so close. They stared each other in the eyes and Church never wanted to leave this moment.

“Are you… all right?”

“Me?” and just like that, they had left the moment. “I’m- I’m fine. Why are you asking that?”

Wash hesitated, seeming to considering his words carefully. “You… didn’t eat Tucker’s burger earlier.”

“What? Why the hell do you remember that?”

“I… wrote it down.”

“Why would you write that down?”

Wash considered his words again, and it bothered Church in a way he couldn’t define. Just say it, he wanted to say. Just talk. But he kept quiet, allowing Wash the space to consider.

“Carolina says you haven’t wanted to join her for missions lately.”

“What? I join her all the time.”

“Not in her armor. And you used to piggyback of Tucker and Caboose more, too. You haven’t been wanting to leave your body. Not even for a milkshake.”

Church ignored the accusations and avoided the question, focusing instead on, “You talk about me with Carolina?”

“Of course.” Wash said, staring at Church like it was a stupid question. “She’s worried about you.”

Church winced, the sentence hitting him with guilt like he was being struck by the butt of a gun. “Well, she shouldn’t be, okay? It’s not a big deal. I just, I like independence.”

“You also like milkshakes.”

“Yeah, well, I’m… watching my figure.”

Wash laughed, and Church laughed with him. It was nice, to make Wash laugh. It wasn’t something Church would eve have imagined he was capable of.

“I promise I’m fine, okay? Stop worrying about me.”

Wash looked at him for a moment, expression unreadable to Church. Finally, he shook his head, saying, “You’re lucky that I know you’re not.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“It means that you have been incredibly over protective and annoying lately and if I didn’t know you weren’t okay I wouldn’t be putting up with it.”

Church rolled his eyes. “I am not overprotective and annoying”

“Oh yeah?” Wash flipped through some pages of his notepad and held it out to Church. “Then explain this.”

Epsilon has been incredibly overprotective and annoying lately. He’s lucky I know he’s not okay or I wouldn’t be putting up with it.

Church glared at the notebook. “I’m gonna rip that page out.”

“That’s fine. I would never forget how annoying you are.”

“All right.” Church moved to get up in a huff before Wash pulled him back down.

“Come on, don’t go, I’m kidding. Well, sort of.”

“Yeah yeah yeah.” Church folded his arms and grumbled angrily as he settled back into Wash. “Aren’t we on a date? Why the hell are we trying to talk about my problems? Can’t we just relax?”

Wash sighed, but gave Church a soft smile. “Fair enough.” He pulled away from Church, lying down.

“Come relax?” He pat his chest, gesturing for Church to lie with him.

Church blushed, flustered by Wash’s bare chest, but— oh, whatever. They were on a beach date. A little skin on skin never hurt anyone.

Church laid his head on Wash’s chest, almost instantly soothed by the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. He was always tracking it, of course, always making sure that all his loved ones vital signs were in an acceptable range. But it was different to be pressed against him, to feel the vibrations against his own skin. To have Wash’s hand carding through his hair. To have his own gently stroking Wash’s waist.

Maybe the question of how he managed to get here was impossible for him to answer. But maybe, in just this moment, the question didn’t matter as much as the fact. The fact that he was here.

They were here.

And they stayed there, so comfortable in the shade of the perfectly angled umbrella, until…

A click of a camera shutter went off.

“Cute as hell.”

Church looked up to see Tucker standing above them, camera in hand, still soaking wet.

“You motherfucker.”

Church started to get up to beat the shit out of Tucker, but the hand in his hair tightened around him, holding him in place.

“Hey!”

“I thought you wanted to relax?” Wash teased, not even bothering to open his eyes to look at him.

As Church wrestled against Wash’s grip and his two other boyfriends cheered them on. Church was struck by how much he hated these people. And by how much he loved these people.

And maybe, right now, things weren’t all right. But maybe, eventually, hopefully, in the end, there really will be nothing wrong.

#epsilon church #agent washington #lavernius tucker #michael caboose #churchington #chuckingboose #fanfic #fic #latest man in the WORLD #sorry ;-; hope it is good enough to make up for it #red vs blue secret santa 2022 #rvb secret santa 2022 #listen if you believe and dream with all your heart it can still be 2022 okay #chromatic writing

53 notes · View notes

specialofficerlemons · 2 years

Text

What Could Have Been

Summary: Before the big battle with Charon, Epsilon uploads himself into a robot body that was intended for Alpha, thinking it could be helpful for the fight to come. He and Wash have a heart to heart.

Rating: M

Warnings: None

Pairing: Agent Washington/Epsilon Church

Notes: This is more feelings than sex. I can't remember if I wrote this right before the season 13 finale or a few episodes before. I was going through some stuff and needed to work it out through some blorbos lol. There was also this theory before the finale that Church might get his body back. That, uh, didn't happen TwT

Word Count: 1342

Washington's nerves were alert with anticipation. The final battle with Charon was only a matter of time, but they didn't have any orders yet, so he was pacing the halls. The lights in the hall went dim and he heard the sound of a fuse blow in a nearby room. Suspicious, he opened the door and saw a soldier standing in front of a console, messing with it.

"Soldier!" he barked, using his authority voice. "What's going on in here?" The soldier glanced over his shoulder at Wash. It was too dark to make out his face. Wash looked at the rest of his body and saw that he was completely naked. "What the hell? Who are you?"

The man looked down at his hand. "I think I'm starting to remember…"

Wash's eyes went wide. "Church?" He stepped into the room and shut the door. The emergency lights were just bright enough that he could make out his figure. "Epsilon?" he asked quietly. It was definitely his voice. He looked closer. The face was similar to the Alpha's, but it was less angry, sadder. Icy blue eyes looked into his own and he felt the breath leave his body.

"David…" Epsilon whispered. "No, you don't like to be called David. You're just Washington now." Wash swallowed. Epsilon chuckled and ran a hand through his hair. "Sorry, it's starting to come back to me. It's kind of like before, when I was in the artifact and then the other stuff. It's just taking me a while to integrate with this body."

"This body? How? Where did you get this?" Wash asked, scanning it. It looked like a normal human body…no, it was too pale, too perfect. There were no scars or blemishes, no stray hairs or stretch marks.

"When we killed me…no, that's not right. When we killed the Director, we found a bunch of these robot bodies. They weren't really meant for me. I mean, technically they were. They were meant for the Alpha. We decided to bring some along in case we needed them. I figured I may as well try one out before…" he went quiet. "Before we do whatever we're about to do. It's serious, I know that much. I can feel it in my bones or whatever is actually in this body." His head snapped up and he pointed at Wash, making him jump. "Charon! That's what's happening!" He rolled his head and shook out his arms. "Okay. I think I'm fully integrated now. Man is this weird. I haven't been in a body for a while. It's a totally different experience when you've unlocked your ridiculous AI powers."

Wash was a little unnerved by what was happening. He and Epsilon had mostly made their peace, but this was different.

Almost as if he could sense his thoughts, Epsilon turned to him. "I never got to apologize for what I did to you," he said quietly. "I hurt you so much. I…I didn't mean to, but I did."

"I don't blame you for that. It wasn't your fault."

"But it was. It wasn't my my fault. It was because of the Director, but I am the Director…" He put his hands to his temples, curling his fingers into his hair.

"No, Church," Wash said, putting his hands on his shoulders. Those icy blue eyes looked into his again. "You aren't him. He hurt you much more than you hurt me."

Epsilon melted into his arms, wrapping his around him. "Sometimes I don't know," he whispered. "I don't know who I am, where the Director ends and Epsilon begins."

Wash smiled into his shoulder. "If there's anyone who can understand what that's like, it's me. It happens to me too."

Epsilon squeezed him tighter. "But that- that's my fault!"

Wash shushed him and pulled them apart. He used his thumb to wipe away the tears that were forming in his eyes.

Epsilon chuckled. "Weird old man," he muttered, wiping his own face with the heels of his hands. "Builds a bunch of robots that can cry. I hope I don't short something out."

Wash laughed with him, leaning their foreheads together. "You aren't the Director, you're Epsilon, you're Church. You aren't him. You are you."

"Who am I though?" he asked, leaning against him.

Wash inhaled deeply. "You are an existence built on memories and you make new memories every day. You're an experience." He held Epsilon's face in his hands and without thinking, leaned in and kissed him gently. His skin was smooth and soft. He didn't even notice when Epsilon started to kiss back. He was dimly aware of the deft hands pulling apart his armor as he ran his hands down Epsilon's too perfect body. He let Epsilon back him against the console and strip his undersuit off.

It was such a bizarre experience, to have a physical manifestation of the AI that nearly destroyed him grinding against him as he himself pulled him closer.

"Washington…" he whispered against his mouth.

"Yes, god, yes Epsilon," he moaned into his mouth before quieting him. Church slid in between his legs, their erections rubbing together. Then, he shifted, pulling his cheeks apart, and pushed inside of him. Wash cried out in pain and shock, but he didn't let him pull away. He needed this. He needed Epsilon to be inside him. He didn't care that it didn't feel good, he didn't care that they were about to go into battle, he didn't care that Carolina might have access to these memories. "Yes, Epsilon! Yes!"

His mouth dropped open and let out a breath. It was unlike any experience he'd had before. It was electric, it was intense, it was like dry ice, freezing and burning and corrosive. Epsilon gasped and shuddered, burying his forehead in Wash's chest. The words 'implantation' and 'integration' came to mind.

Wash thought that this was what it should have been like. He had seen what York was like with Delta and North was like with Theta. Being together brought them all such joy and comfort. This is what it should have been like. For so long he'd lamented getting the wrong AI. He was supposed to get Eta, not Epsilon. But now, it seemed like Epsilon was perfect for him.

They made love for an indeterminate amount of time. Time seemed to speed up and slow down and it was entirely possible that it did and it wasn't just a trick of the mind. Wash marveled at Epsilon's body, how lifelike it was. Wash could feel the sweat on his skin, ran his hands over his contracting and relaxing muscles, tested the pliability of his chest as he breathed in and out.

"Washington!" he mumbled, his face slack.

Wash turned his face towards him. "Church…Epsilon…"

Epsilon took Washington's face in his hands. "I will never hurt you again, Wash, I swear."

Washington shushed him. He didn't want to think about the future.

"I'll protect you! I'll do it right this time!"

Washington silenced him with a kiss. "Just be here with me, now. That's all I want from you, Epsilon. That's all I want."

Epsilon wrapped his arms around him and held him tightly as the movements of his hips sped up. Washington stroked his hair and whispered sweet nothings in his ear until he reached a limit and let out a cry as he came. Epsilon did him the courtesy of pulling out and finishing in his hand.

"Weird old man," Epsilon repeated, "built a bunch of robots that can cum."

Wash threw back his head and laughed. Epsilon laughed with him and looked around for something to wipe his hand off on before settling for his thigh.

They both knew that any moment now they would be called to arms, but until then, they could spend that time pretending the rest of the world didn't exist, that it was just the two of them, that things were as they could have been, as they should have been.

#my fic #churchington #Agent Washington #ai epsilon #epsilon church #leonard church #if you can guess what children's cartoon came out at the time of me writing this #and i stole a line from #don't worry about it #red vs blue #rvb #ns/fw #lemon zest

8 notes · View notes