#comte ikevamp

[memoria-99]

Ikemen Vampire: Guys before the plastic surgery

[sweetlittleneptune]

things MC has said at some point (pt.2)

"the fact that you died a virgin is really not that big of a surprise" (to Isaac)

"modern society is still horny for Sherlock, how do you feel about that?" (to Arthur)

"you're adorable, but you got mommy issues written on your forehead and I'm not sure I wanna get involved in that" (to Charles)

"you trigger my 'slap a bitch' mode every time you walk in the room" (to Mozart)

"you're kinda like Brad Pitt. everyone thinks you're hot and it makes you boring" (to Leonardo)

"you give wayyy too many murder ideas in your plays to be acting like this" (to Shakespeare)

"Comte, you should know how terrible your taste in men is" (to Comte)

[natimiles]

All For Love | Fight For Love | Virtue and Vice

[nuttytani]

Would you love me if I were a worm? Featuring ikemen vampire cast. (With gender neutral reader)

(a/n: when you have too much free time and need your hands to be occupied. Some random bullshit begins to form on your notes)

Napoleon

He finds it funny, why would you turn into a worm?

After seeing your frown tho, he says ok ok yes I will love you

Mozart

Makes a disgusted face and turns you down

First of all, you won't turn into a worm. So why should he answer?

"if people can turn into vampires, why can't I turn into a worm?"

He kicks you out of his piano room

Dude has some thoughts to organise

Leonardo

Laughs at you and says, "what will you do if I say no?"

Pretends to forget about it but after some hours, he comes back to you

"no matter how and what you are or will turn into, I'll still love you"

Arthur

"is this some sort of trick question? Well the answer is obviously yes, my love!"

Vincent

Thinks deeply about it and smiles at you

"of course, I'll still love you. I think you'd make a cute worm too."

Theodorus

Scoffs at you and calls you an idiot

Why would you turn into a worm?

And by chance, you DID turn into one, how was he going to take care of you? There's so many worms out there in the world. What if you get lost and he gets some random worm instead and you, are lost and out in the cold, ready to be squashed by big feet.

Dazai

Uno reverses you instead

Now you're trapped

Would you love him if he was a worm?

Gets sad if you don't answer quickly enough

Sebastian

"I am not doing this right now. If you're free, wash those potatoes instead. I'm already busy as it is"

Stays silent for a while and then sighs

"no matter what, I'd love you always and forever"

Comte

Chuckles a bit at the thought and immediately replies yes

He'd give you a good environment to live in. Some really nutritious soil and compost. Maybe a tiny rock for you to play with

"Comte, you just need to say yes... No need to.... Elaborate on what else you'd do"

"Alright. Well, would you love me if I were a worm?"

Shakespeare

Is fascinated that you even came up with such a question

His answer is yes

But at the same time, he's coming up with scripts that include a dramatic romance between worms. For his own pleasure

Vlad

Says yes immediately.

Thinks you'd look like a cute worm

Maybe he'd put roses next to your habitat or in it.

Charles

"of course! In fact, we can both be worms together! We'll be a happy worm couple"

He's actually taking the idea too seriously and goes ahead making worm habitats and gets a book on "how to raise a worm"

Faust

"I'm not sure. Though I suppose researching on a worm wouldn't be that bad"

Seeing you look unimpressed, he just chuckles while patting your head

"I'm only joking. Of course I'd love you"

[chevlvrs]

Honestly all ikevil characters could be here

[yandere-romanticaa]

He's literally one of the finest men in the game, don't @ me

[whatever-fanfics]

MC's dark humor doesn't always land

~~~

Mozart: You are a noisy burden

MC: Thanks, I'll just go kill myself then 🥴

MC: *peace sign's and turns to leave*

Mozart: 😧🤯😨

~~~

Nobunaga: Tonight you shall warm my bed

MC: Ew...

Nobunaga: 🫨

~~~

MC: *looking at Leonardo's room for the first time*

MC: It's like that hoarder room in halloween town 2, where all the trash just accumulates and no one can find anything

Leonardo:...wut?

~~~

*MC at a ball with Le Comte*

Random socialite: And how old are you, old enough to marry I presume 😉 😘

MC: Why would I do that to myself???

Random socialite: 😲

Random socialite: *looks at Le Comte* 👀

Le Comte: *sweating nervously*😅 😓

~~~

MC: *to Arthur* please be cool

Arthur: who's cooler than me 😏

MC: Literally everyone

~~~

Shingen: So how did you and Nobunaga meet?

MC: *without missing a beat* he kidnapped me 😐

Nobunaga: 🙄😒

Shingen: 😧🫢😠😡🤬

Hideyoshi: MC.....😰

MC: I have Stockholm syndrome

~~~

Jean: I no longer wish to live

MC: *not even blinking* Cool same

~~~

Motonari: I'll make sure the war never ends

MC: due to personal reasons you will now be named a menace to society

Motonari: heh..😏

~~~

Silvio: Fuck you!

MC: come here and fuck me yourself you coward!

Silvio: 😳😳😳

~~~

[klutzyroses]

IkeVamp HCs: PDA

How do they handle PDA?

Suitors: All

Napoleon

Probably the most normal about PDA.

Handholding? Yes. Hair ruffling? Of course.

The more intimate affection, such as kissing and caressing is reserved for alone time.

Maybe a few cheek kisses wouldn't hurt, an occasional loving whisper in ear at times.

He isn't too over the top with it unless he is trying to tease her.

Because really, seeing her cute blush is worth a little public sappiness. And it would come out of nowhere.

Particularly when he wants a reaction from her, he may initiate it to catch her by surprise, just to fluster her. Not too much though, because he will get embarrassed too.

But in truth, he isn't ashamed of others knowing that he loves her. He will often be found looking at her fondly when she isn't paying attention.

He'll deny he is doing it, but he can't help it. Sometimes he just needs to stop and just...caught up in how much he loves her.

Not that he would tell her that unprompted. That is his little secret for the time being.

Mozart

Um...Public affection? No.

Not likely

If he is out in public with her, even getting him to hold hands would be met with some questioning.

He'd be conscious of appropriate behaviour when out and about, so amorous interactions in front of other people would be out of the question.

His outright avoidance, especially if Y/N initiates, would probably hurt her feelings a little, but it wouldn't be because he doesn't like her touch.

But that's the sort of behaviour he would prefer engaging in away from the prying eyes of the public.

When they're alone, small hand kisses and endearing names are usually his chosen methods.

He would never want her to feel as though he were rejecting her, which is why he would probably address it before it becomes an issue.

Once boundaries are established, its far less of a heartache when he refuses to engage in affectionate behaviour in public.

Leonardo

He is more lowkey about his affection in public, but definitely smooth about it.

One would think they were secret lovers, the way his touches involved brushing her hand surreptitiously, lingering on her skin and leaving it warm.

He is one of the least overt about his affection in public, hence when it happens, it's always so suave and never fails to get his Cara mia's heart racing.

Subtle warm looks, secret touches on her skin, gentle caresses moving her hair from her face.

Those little signs of fondness, brief and subtle as they may be, leave a lasting effect on his amore, even for an instant.

Where he really thrives however, is in his ability to catch her off guard with his words.

Because he is so understated with his physical affection in public, his words pack more of a punch...mostly because they are sudden.

He will drop a casual 'I love you', so easily that at first, it goes over her head, until she does a double take, almost falling over.

He would follow that up by catching her and teasing her about falling for him, causing her to get even more flustered.

A very smooth signor indeed.

Arthur

He is one of the most shameless, second only to Charles.

PDA, for him, is mostly exaggerated to make a point when he is with her.

That point being, he is unavailable and so is she.

He thinks its adorable when she gets flustered over it, so that is, of course, an added bonus.

He is perfectly content announcing their relationship, declaring her to be his love and his darling aloud, to the chagrin of his admirers.

He tends to lean more towards kisses on her hands, winking at her as he does so, feeling his chest swell with pride when he sees that sweet smile on her face, her cheeks tinted a charming pink, earning themselves a quick kiss of their own.

The flirting....the flirting is nonstop, always sweet and maybe just a touch inappropriate with thinly veiled innuendo.

He may tend to overdo it at times, but really, he is just being silly intentionally for her amusement. And maybe to get that blush from her every now and again.

...Although, that is only part of the reason.

He actually loves to touch her and let her know how much he loves her, no matter who is around.

He is aware that he has...a past and sometimes, remnants of that pop up to sour her mood and make her insecure and he hates himself for that. So obviously, he is not shy to show her how much she means to him in front of others.

Theo

Theo's brand of PDA is...definitely different.

He wouldn't be hesitant to claim her in public verbally, calling her his hondje.

Make no mistake, he wouldn't be very touchy feely in front of others, but there will be no doubt that she is his.

Which is why his more physically affection is usually triggered by jealousy or protectiveness.

Sometimes, he can't resist wrapping an arm around her when he senses she is in need of comfort of some kind, be it because someone or something is making her uneasy, just to, in his own Theo kind of way, assure her that he is there.

She is safe with him and he will be damned if she felt any differently when she is out and about with him.

Sometimes, however, when nobody else is really looking, his look will soften when he meets her gaze, or puts a subtle hand on the base of her spine, usually brushing it off as 'directing' her.

Really its just an excuse to touch her, but he would have to be cornered to admit it aloud.

Vincent

The sweetheart was a joy to be around, always.

He is perfectly content holding her hand when he walks with her.

He could be a little socially oblivious at times, flustering his love with rather open declarations of love...wearing a perfectly innocent look on his face.

Sometimes he will take both her hands in his and kiss them, or maybe run his fingers through her hair.

He doesn't really have a reason to give if asked, he just feels like it.

His affection is so sweet, so tender, it may usually result in adoring moments between them where the world seems to disappear and they can only stare at each other, most likely with Y/N being completely taken by his gentle charm, sparkles and flowers surrounding them before someone has to remind them that they are not alone, snapping them out of their enamored stupor.

Put that is the effect Vincent tends to have on his lover, whether other people are around or not.

He may or may not kiss her. It depends on how bold he is feeling that day. Not a deep one, just a quick kiss on her lips, short and sweet.

The more intimate stuff is for behind closed doors. He isn't one to be too inappropriate in public.

He does have the capacity to be embarrassed after all. He may be a bit sheepish if he is called out, pink cheeks and all.

He can't help it. He loves her, that's just a fact.

Isaac

He's...hesitant about it. He's not necessarily averse to it, but...

Well he wouldn't see the reason for being so...overt about their relationship.

Handholding? Well alright, if she really wants to, he will hold her hand while they walk.

But beyond that, he would be a bit more resistant.

Kisses, hugs, the more intimate touches, he does not want others to see that.

So much so that he may even dodge any kisses she may try to give him. Y/N shouldn't take it too personally, even if it does seem as though he were rejecting her, he isn't, honest.

He would scramble to explain that he wasn't ashamed of her in anyway, because it would seem that way after a while.

His affection, however, would be more...subconscious actually.

Playing with the ends of her hair or tracing her palms, little things he wouldn't even be aware he was doing unless pointed out to him.

He's more affectionate when they're alone and it comes as more as a surprise to her, as he would be more confident about just kissing her, or taking the initiative in general, much more so when they're out and about.

Jean

Knowing how Jean is, people would assume that he would be completely against public displays of affection.

The honest truth? They would be correct in some aspects, but...

Not as much as they would think.

Its less because of his aversion to it and more because he has very little idea of how to conduct himself in public as a couple.

Being as socially clueless as he can be at times, he isn't entirely sure what is deemed appropriate and what isn't.

Its somewhat endearing to see him startle his lover by holding her hand seemingly out of nowhere.

He would probably admit that he received advice from the other residents that it was common for lovers to hold hands.

Which is the sweetest thing, but it would seem a bit...disingenuous to Y/N, as though he were doing it because he feels obligated.

But with a bit discussion over boundaries and what was deemed appropriate, a comfortable norm would definitely help him be more at ease and natural with his affection.

He would also be a bit more spontaneous, though always asking for her consent whenever he tries something different.

Dazai

Spontaneous.

He moves to the beat of his own drum, so the opinion of others is...so irrelevant to this man.

When in public with his love, he tends to do whatever comes to mind, no matter how random it may be.

Take her hand count her fingers and compliment them? But of course.

Steal a sweet peck from her and tell her how pretty they looked so he just felt like it? Naturally.

At times it may feel odd, but he has his own way of being affectionate and he doesn't have much impulse control to speak of.

Not since he's had her in his life. He may not be the best at expressing himself...at all, but for better or for worse, she will know she is loved.

Even with his oddball methods of showing it.

He particularly enjoys seeing her blush, so he does go out of his way to surprise her, whether it be by staring at her for prolonged eye contact, just to tell her she is beautiful. Unprompted.

The surprise on her pretty face as her cheeks erupt into red roses brings warmth into his chest as he chuckles, unable to stop himself from caressing one of them.

Anyone watching might think he is random...and he is, but he doesn't pay any mind to that.

Comte

His brand of affection is certainly more restrained. He is a gentleman after all.

He doesn't want to do anything inappropriate in front of others, he wouldn't want to embarrass her.

But he most certainly wasn't shy about wrapping a loving arm around her waist, holding her close to him, his comforting presence washing through her.

He is proud of her and is more than happy to show her off, though only as much as she would allow.

Elegant hand kisses, gracious intertwining of fingers, little acts that are not overboard, but leave little to the imagination.

Where he does go a little overboard is when it comes time to spoil her.

She wants for nothing. Comte's cherie wants for absolutely nothing.

He will gently kiss her forehead when she expresses any concerns, because to make her shine the way she deserves makes him happy.

He worries not over what others think too much, but he is respectful and classy when in the public eye.

Emphasis on when they are in the public eye. Its a different story when they are alone.

Sebastian

Subtle, almost imperceptible, one would miss it if they weren't paying attention.

He is a good deal more reserved about being affectionate when in public.

Perhaps he would take to simply being closer to her, proximity wise.

He may occasionally gently place his hand on her back, usually under the guise of directing her one direction or the other.

Truth be told, one would have to have known Sebastian prior to him being in a romantic relationship to see the difference.

Only then would his more almost secretive touches, that could easily be brushed off as platonic or friendly, be seen in slightly different light.

His demeanor generally isn't all that changed, specially not in public. He really isn't overly affectionate in front of others, but those who know him would definitely be aware that he is more...touchy with her.

Again, nothing too incriminating to the untrained eye, but so long as she understands the sentiment, that's all that really matters anyway.

Vlad

The romantic gestures he would gravitate towards would be more...innocent. Sweet, almost a bit childish in an endearing way.

Playing with her fingers, intertwining his between them, tucking her hair away from her lovely face.

His affection, in public, was more reminiscent of an admirer simply in awe of her.

He is devoted to her and her alone, and sometimes he may just act in the moment, bringing their linked fingers to his lips to his and pressing a kiss to the back of her hand. And of course, slip a flower or two into her hair.

He especially likes to profess his affection with words as much as actions.

Softly whispered words of adoration will often make their way to her, wrapping her in their warmth, even if he isn't actually touching her.

He isn't entirely conscious of how others perceive this, nor does he care all that much. Sometimes he just wants to bask in his love for her, take a moment to be grateful for her and show her that gratitude in full.

Faust

His brand of public affection often sent the message that Y/N was his very close assistant than his lover.

Its not often that it happens to be honest.

In contrast to his oddball sire Vlad and the overly affectionate Charles, he is much muted and covert about being affectionate.

He is quite blunt about it as well, if he is asked, probably by the children he tends to care for, if Y/N is his girlfriend.

He will just say yes, with a completely straight face and leave it at that.

Though the children themselves will be confused, as their fairly naive ideas of grand displays of love will be very much absent when they observe Faust and Y/N.

He would only indulge them by going to kiss her forehead if they didn't stop pestering him about it.

He just doesn't see the appeal of behaving in public how he behaved in private.

Only she needs to see his more vulnerable, genuine side. She's the only one who deserves to.

Charles

Umm...

If left unchecked, he could and would get carried away.

He would not care who is there, he can't keep his hands to himself.

Normally, he sticks to hand holding and cuddling.

But sometimes he'll sneak his hand on her thigh, maybe starts kissing her with reckless abandon.

He has no qualms about sneaking his hand up her dress while does and if she doesn't stop it, they may just start getting a bit wild.

Clothes might start dropping if Charles is left to do as he pleases. Its not so much out of lack of care of what others think, he isn't even thinking about, its more because he just wants to bury her in his love and drown in hers, no matter where and when.

And the mouth on him sometimes...

He is shameless about flirting with her too, oscillating between sugary heartfelt confessions of adoration and more...daring, lascivious declarations.

None of which are discreet.

In the slightest.

Galileo

He doesn't.

The man doesn't do like that.

Frankly, if someone was told explicitly that Galileo and Y/N were a couple, they wouldn't know it by looking at them.

Maybe the most affection seen from him would be standing close to her. Maybe if his guard is down, his face may soften when looking at her. But that's it. Nobody is seeing more than that.

Many people from the outside would question the perceived coldness of the relationship.

The couple would often seem more like acquaintances than lovers.

She would probably be touching him more than he is touching her to be honest.

But in private...that is not the case.

He prefers to keep his more tender side for her and her alone.

When it's just the two of them, he would indulge her with gentle caresses and tender words.

He is very different with her when it's just them, versus when they are out in public.

Drake

Drake doesn't care a great deal about what others think. He does what he wants when he wants to.

He doesn't behave that differently with her in public than he does in private.

Sure, he wouldn't jump her for risky trysts in the open, not unless she was up for it, but he wouldn't balk over kissing her in front of others. He doesn't do it often but he wouldn't be against it.

His boldness goes as far her timidity allows, really.

He's not so much into hand holding as much as he likes giving her head pats, caressing her face and giving her hugs and forehead kisses.

Especially headpats and forehead kisses.

He wouldn't go overboard but needless to say, he is rather affectionate in public. Unabashedly so.

He also flirts and teases rather openly, if only to see her flustered. Whispering in her ear, cornering her against surfaces, he does not care who sees. If called out, he will simply laugh it off.

He cares more about doting on his fawn than anybody else and their opinions anyway.

[lukeblogsstuff]

When I say I cried from how much I laughed from this, I’m not joking 😂😂

I love them

[ana-thedaydreamer]

I got the young trio purebloods here because they are all in top 5 of the category “Childhood” in the last election in Ikevamp JP 😭🥺🫶

[xxsycamore]

❝ 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐠𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬? ❞

╰┈➤ ⁉️ Everyone is acting so strange today, and Sebastian seems to be the only one noticing it.

Sebastian, Comte, Napoleon, Theodorus, Vincent, Mozart, Jean, Arthur, Isaac, Leonardo, Dazai • rating: G • tags: April Fools' Day; Pranks and Practical Jokes; poor sebas; Humor; Crack • wordcount: 1,682 • masterlist

a/n: HAPPY APRIL FOOLS! After Dazai pranking everyone and then everyone pranking Dazai, it seems like this year's target is Sebas…

It's not every day that Sebastian allows himself the indulgence of enjoying a drink with his masters, even when they so generously invite him to the table in the game room. The events of last night are but a blur in his memory now, as he's not the best at holding his liquor and neither has their immunity to hangovers. But a butler must be prim and proper at all times! While he's on duty, that's it. So that's why he allowed himself the fun of last night, but is readily up and out of his bed early in the morning today.

He enters the kitchen, humming the tune to Mozart's Turkish March in this tranquil moment of being the only soul awake in the whole mansion, on his way to begin preparing breakfast-

"Oh, good morning Sebas. I'm already done with some things here, figured I might help you."

"My! What a nice surprise Monsieur Napoleon, thank you."

Huh.

"M-M-M-Monsieur Napoleon what are you doing here????"

"Helping you with breakfast."

"No, gods, I was wondering why are you awake at such an early hour-"

Napoleon looks at him dumbfounded. And so does Sebas, mirroring him. Granted, there are dark circles under his eyes but that hardly does anything about the vigor with which he moves the frying pan and multitasks with the preparation of another ingredient at the same time.

"Is it that strange that I felt like waking up earlier today?"

Well, yes it is! That's what Sebastian wants to shout at the top of his lungs, but he can only blink mesmerized instead. Fearing that he might offend him in some way if he keeps this up, he saves his confusion to himself and gets back on track with his task.

The breakfast preparation goes on swimmingly with Napoleon's help, even if he strangely seems to have forgotten how to cook all of a sudden so he needs some serious memory refreshment... Sebastian blames it on his lack of sleep, of course that would be the reason.

Soon the dining room begins filling with the real early-bird residents that pose no surprises for Sebastian, and the plates are already waiting in front of them like clockwork.

"Pancakes again? I'm starting to get tired of this. You got something else for me, Sebastian?"

The sound of pots and pans falling to the floor greatly concerns the van Gogh brothers at the table after the younger one's question, but soon after the butler emerges from the kitchen with a haphazardly pieced-together English breakfast. He places it in front of Theodorus who asked for the change, waiting. Waiting to see if he's going to eat it at all.

"Here you go, master Theodorus. Do you need extra jam, or-"

"No need, looks more than enough to me. Why are you staring at me like that? Is it poisonous?"

"Gods, no, how could it be! I'm merely...surprised is all."

Vincent chuckles a little at the exchange, preparing to dig in on his portion of...pancakes, fortunately. But he pauses.

"Theo, would you hand me the syrup? I feel like eating something sweeter today!"

"Stand up and take it yourself."

Sebastian's eyes are about to pop out of his eye sockets.

"Messieurs, is everything alright with-"

The door opens with a bang that belongs to no gentlemen living in this household.

And certainly not to Le Comte de Saint-Germain.

"'morning."

"M-monsieur le Comte, what are you wearing?"

Comte's casual walk to his place at the head of the table with hands in his pockets is rivaled only by the even more casual look he sports today, with a halfway-open shirt and a pair of checkered trousers that don't really match. To finish off the look, his hair is a mess. He lands with a thud on his chair, raising his feet to rest crossed on the table.

"What am I wearing? Since when did you start asking so many questions?"

"I'm terribly sorry."

Comte sighs and snaps his fingers repeatedly in the air. "Coffee. Now."

"I already brew a pot of your preferred morning tea-"

"Don't make me repeat myself, butler."

"I got it."

On his way to the kitchen, Sebastian overhears Comte slamming his fist on the table telling everyone that from now on, they'll be paying rent.

Sebastian must be sleeping. This has to be some kind of nightmare. There's no other logical explanation.

When he returns to the dining room the door opens to welcome another couple of residents - Jean and Mozart.

"Good morning Herr Mozart. Good morning to you too, Monsieur Jean, what a surprise!"

Mozart and Jean both turn to Sebastian...and they give him their brightest smiles. Imaginary flowers bloom in the air around them. They greet in a cheerful voice together as one, and it's the most beautiful melody. "Good morning, Sebastian!"

"We decided to grab a bite before our trip to town today."

"Your... your what?"

"That's right, I'll be taking Jean in town with me. The carriage is already waiting at the gate."

Mozart going to...town?? With a carriage?? With Jean??

"Aha! The trace of this bloody delicious smell seems to have led me to this dining room!"

Now what? Sebastian turns in the direction of Arthur's voice albeit it sounds a little different than usual, as if he's playing a role... and there he is, having just entered the dining room... with a looking glass in his hand and a pipe in his mouth.

"Good morning, Master Arthur. Your observation skills are on point as always. What's with the curious accessories?"

Sebastian doesn't know why he asks anymore.

"Why, I'll be going on a Sherlock Homles book fair later today! You know it's all the hype these days, I figured it's the best place to learn something about my beloved character that I don't know. You know my methods, Watson. Haha!"

Thank god, Sebastian is not the only one about to faint right now. Given how normal everything else was taken by his housemates. Theo says the one thing Sebastian couldn't bring himself to say.

"This idiot has reached rock bottom in his search for skirts he hasn't yet fooled around with."

Arthur looks...grossed out. As if he's been made fun of by Dazai, or something similar. Actually, there haven't been a great deal of chances to see Arthur sporting this expression. It's definitely strange.

"Theo, could you not be so foul-mounted, please? You know I hold no interest in the fair sex."

"A-Are you feeling well, Master Arthur? Maybe when you drink your coffee-"

"Ah no please, tea it is for me!"

"Are you feeling well, Master Arthur?????"

"Sebastian seems really uptight today. Are YOU feeling well, Sebastian? Why don't you sit with us for a while?" Jean smiles at him again. It's a smile Sebastian wants to protect. It should be automatically making him feel better but it only serves to increase his confusion. He even sat next to Comte. Comte doesn't deserve this! At least not with his current behavior. Oh how strange of a thought that is.

"I appreciate your concern, but, I just need to know what is happening with all of you today. I can't be calm until I ensure that you, my masters, are alright, and I demand you tell me what is happening this instant!"

A near dozen pairs of eyes blink at Sebastian as if he's indeed the crazy one. He sits down on the offered chair, then quickly stands up again. "No, please tell me what is-"

The door opens yet again and this time it's Leonardo and Isaac who enter. Sebastian paces left and right, trying to spot empty plates to take to the kitchen before he can witness anything weird again-

"Isaac, mio amico, can you please not smoke in here? You know I can't stand the smell..."

"AAAAAAAGH!" Sebastian yells, breaking his professional image and running straight towards the door. He can't do this. It doesn't matter if he escapes now. It's just a nightmare. Just a nightmare-

He nearly crashes into the person entering at the same time.

"Hello Sebas-kun~"

Through the DOOR?

Sebastian breaks. Like a stone statue slammed by the pressure of a cataclysm despite the decades of stoicism, even if he thought he'd seen everything...

He falls to his knees in defeat.

...

...

"APRIL FOOLS'!"

Before he has a chance to remove his hands from his eyes where he tried to block the world, a wave of residents quite literally falls over him, each embracing him and laughing.

Okay, NOW he's confused.

"April fools? But- But my calendar said it's-"

"Someone had a little too much to drink last night and had to be carried to his room... let's say we meddled a little with it. Sorry, Sebas." Napoleon pats his shoulder. "Okay, can I go to sleep now?"

Sebastian laughs, and despite what he predicted for himself just a minute ago, it's not out of descending to madness. It's a genuine laughter, one he hasn't had in a while.

"I would never guess you could be capable of doing such a thing! Every one of you! My god, you got me quite well."

"Heh, guess you don't know us well enough then, eh? Remember this well, some of those guys are going to remember it for the rest of their second lives." Leonardo says, finally lighting that cigarillo. Good thing they didn't have to put on the act for longer than that.

"Indeed. I hope we weren't too harsh on you, Sebastian. My residents are always such naughty boys." Comte consoles, suspiciously looking as if it was his idea all along.

Sebastian chuckles some more, then he stands to his feet, dusting off his uniform and letting out a small cough behind his fist.

"My masters, that was indeed too naughty of you! I appreciate seeing you have fun, and I have to admit, you got me well. But that doesn't mean I won't find it fitting to flick some foreheads."

"Sebaaas, can we please have our usual breakfast now?"

"Why yes, coming right away!"

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[memoria-99]

Fights in the halls IkeVamp ver.

[sweetlittleneptune]

"You speak French??"

The translations were made by me, as I'm a native French speaker! tho, if you have any issues/questions/see any mistakes, don't be afraid to point them out!

The fact that you never admitted to speaking French to the residents of the mansion was a simple lie of omission. You didn’t think it was that important at first, and then you also noticed how much of an advantage that was. This meant you could spy on some of residents without much trouble at all. Sadly, the charade couldn’t last forever.

NAPOLEON

He had a habit of rambling in French to himself. Random thoughts, most of them unimportant and simple little reminders to do something later. But every once in a while, he would mumble something that caught your attention, and you’d have to hold in your laughter. He had to stop though, once he realized you understood what he was saying and was absolutely humiliated.

It had been a rough day, and the man was frustrated. Between the bickering kids and the eccentric residents, he was practically boiling. That was reason enough to be mumbling insults and such.

“C’est juste des cons. Pas capable de se la fermer, tous inutiles.”

(They’re just idiots. Can’t shut up, useless.)

And it came out before you could even think about it. You just had to.

“Quand même, c'est un peu méchant M. Napoléon. Mais je l’admets… ils sont un peu lourds.”

(Well, that’s a bit rude Mr. Napoleon. But I’ve got to admit… they are a bit annoying)

The look on his face was absolutely priceless. Surprise, confusion, worry, all of it. Napoleon opened his mouth once, then closed it. he reopened it again and closed it once more. Third time’s the charm they say…

“Since when…?”

“Ah, that’s my little secret. Just don’t tell the other, will you?”

Suspicion crossed his face.

“Why?”

“You know, it’s a great advantage to have. Would be a shame to lose it.”

“You’re a devil Nunuche, but a smart one I’ll admit.”

And with a chuckle he left the room

COMTE DE SAINT-GERMAIN

You intended to tell him at first. When he started bringing you to all those dinners, galas, and parties for the aristocrats of the city. You wanted to speak with him and the other attendants. But as soon as they heard the accent in your “bonsoir”, they switched to English, and you rolled with it for some reason. Now it had been months, and you felt it would be weird to start speaking French now.

You were used to being ignored in conversations too. None of it was on purpose and you couldn’t take it personally when Comte was such a popular man to begin with! What you weren’t used to, though, was being disrespected right in your face as if you weren’t there.

The first comment had been something along the lines of “you finally found someone to give you a son!”

Your husband was quick to answer that he had chosen you because you were you. It had nothing to do with kids.

The second almost made you open your mouth. But it was no use. Comte made very sure to let him know he was crossing a limit and ended the conversation there.

“Some people lack manners, it seems. No use wasting more time on this unimportant discussion.”

You simply nodded and followed.

But then you wanted a little treat to eat, and the buffet was on the other side of the room. So, you left Comte for a moment to grab something. Sadly, the same man from earlier was there, chatting away with someone you didn’t know. As soon as he saw you, you knew something unpleasant would happen.

“Elle n’est rien de bien spécial, mais j’imagine qu’elle doit être particulièrement bonne au lit si le Comte de Saint-Germain a décidé qu’elle était bonne à marier. »

(she’s nothing special, but I guess she’s particularly good in bed if the Count of Saint-Germain has decided to make her his wife.)

You pondered for a moment if you should even grace him with an answer. It wouldn’t do any good, you knew that. But if the man had the galls to say it, he surely could listen to your answer, no?

“Monsieur, j’apprécierais sincèrement que vous vous absteniez de m’insulter en ma présence. Et puis, ce sont de riches paroles, venant de l’homme dont la femme est reconnue pour avoir plusieurs amants. Au moins, l’un de nous sait satisfaire son partenaire… "

(Sir, I would appreciate if you could hold back from insulting me in my presence. And this is rich, coming from the man whose wife is known to have several lovers. At least, one of us can satisfy their spouse…)

Red rose to the man’s face.

“Eh bien, je crois que le message est clair! 

(Well, I think the message is clear!)

Comte’s voice made you jump in your place. You hadn’t heard him coming at all! You turned to look at him with shyness in your eyes, a bit worried he would scowl you for your action. But all he did was look at you with pride.

As you left though, he did ask where you learned to speak French.

“A while back, in my world.”

JEAN D'ARC

That night you were staying up late to clean up after one of Leonardo’s raids of the library. It was rotten work for sure, but someone had to do it and Sebastian was finishing up polishing of the silverware. So here you were, going through piles of books left on tables.

Time passed and after a while of not hearing any noise, you figured it wouldn’t hurt to sit down and read for a few minutes. There was a book that had caught your attention while cleaning up. It was a little book of French fables. Some of which you remembered reading back in school when you were young. Slowly, the stories caught your attention for good and the world around you faded.

That’s when Jean entered the room, in the hopes of finding some peace and some books to help him learn to write and read. Still hooked on your little island of nostalgia, you didn’t hear him at all. And him, not wanting to bother you, stayed in his little corner of the library.

An hour must have passed before your eyes left the pages of the book. But when you did, you were surprised to find you weren’t alone anymore. And you felt a bit cheap about being caught slacking on your job.

“I didn’t hear you come in, Jean. What are you doing here?”

“I’m trying to read this book. But it’s hard, I don’t understand much…”

The poor man was trying to read “Les Misérables”, of course he was having a hard time understanding what all those fancy words meant! You held your chuckle in and handed him your fable book.

“You might find this one easier to read. You picked a rather daunting book to try to learn.”

“Oh but… you know I speak French mademoiselle. Your book-” You smiled.

“Take a look at the cover. What does it say?”

It took him a minute to decipher the sounds and the words, but he managed to read the title out:

“Les fables de La Fontaine.” Jean paused. “It’s in French…”

“Yes, it is.”

“You can read French?” there was curiosity in his eyes.

“Oui, mais pas que. Je le parle aussi.”

(Yes, but that’s not all. I can speak it too.)

“Je ne savais pas. Vous ne l’avez jamais dit.”

(I didn’t know. You never told us)

“It’s my little secret,” you answered with a smirk. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I should finish cleaning Leo’s mess.”

“Merci.”

“Bienvenue!”

[natimiles]

Out of Context Ikevamp

Masterlists

[yanderepuck]

Handing flaming hot cheetos to everyone in the mansion to see who survives

Napoleon: he can have a handful and he's fine. He's eating one of the small .99 cent bags

Mozart: mainly doesn't think it tastes good, but also holding back a cough

Leonardo: he's dowing the entire bag without realizing it. I feel like he'd dip them in something but I have no clue what

Vincent: tearing up a little. He likes some spice but he likes a flavorful spice. Hell eat a few more though just to be sure

Theo: straight up doesn't like them. He wasn't expecting them to actually have a kick either

Arthur: he's holding back a choke and tears as best he can. Please give him milk

Isaac: is choking and crying. Boy is gasping and can't handle it. Stereotypical British boy

Jean: immediately sip it out. Hates it. Don't you dare give him that again. He's now searching for milk

Dazai: also eating the bag shamelessly

Shakespeare: he's so confused by chips to begin with that now making them hot is overwhelming him. British boy number 3 is down. Doesn't like how it stains his fingers

Comte: what do you think? Man is eating so much cheese and bread to get that spice out of his mouth. He's handling it worse than Jean and Isaac.

Sebastian: doesn't mind them but is really only eating a smaller bag not a big family sized bag. But he might if he's distracted enough and that's the bag he had

Vlad: handling it better than you thought. Is also enjoying a small bag of them.

Faust: made a weird face when he first tried them. Not because it was too spicy. But because he thought they tasted bad. Took him a while to get the taste out

Charles: had to eat a few to figure out if he liked them or hated them. He's still not sure so every time you offer him one he will take it and go through all those stages again

Drake: British boy number 4 is actually handling it well. He likes the flavor because well...he's been on a boat for too long and just wants flavor. He's not eating a big bag but he doesn't want the small bag

Galileo: choking. He didn't enjoy that at all. He tells you it's because they taste bad but that tear at the corner of his eye tells you it's the spice

[dododrawsstuff]

Kofi membership reward for @valkyyriia . Thank you so much for your support! She chose Comte from Ikevamp and of course I had to draw his fangies

If you're interested in joining the Kofi membership, the tier with a colored sketch bust has 15 slots left