#coscon intro

[cosmic-conundrums]

Coscon Intro: the hotel itself

Welcome to the Cosmic Conundrum Hotel & Cabaret

That’s what the sign says, the neon lights glittering out into the fathomless void of space. There isn't anything out here, in this forgotten sector of the galaxy. There isn’t supposed to be anything out here, and yet here it is.

How to describe it? It appears to be a normal asteroid at first glance, craggy and dark amongst the stars. But when you round it to the other side, it becomes something unlike anything you've ever seen.

The crags and hollows here have been shaped and molded as if by some giant hand, twisted into the edifice of a magnificent building. It’s carved directly into the surface of the asteroid, the walls and structure formed out of the rock itself. Through the windows can be seen light glittering in shades of gold and red and purple and green, seeming to shift every few seconds.

The entrance to this fever dream of a structure is framed by tall columns, and as you get closer you can see that these columns are carved all over with names, connected by a swirling ribbon dotted by stylized stars.

The doors themselves are made of delicate colored glass, patterns of warm, fractured sunrise on one door, a purple-black night sky shot through with silver stars on the other. They’re set deep into an overhang of dark rock, looking as though it has been painstakingly chipped away by hand. Right above this shadowed hollow is the sign, electric neon green and so bright it’s like staring into a sun. The welcome is in curling, elegant lettering, the letters themselves having to be at least a hundred feet tall each.

There's a landing dock branching out from the entrance, where docking ships are greeted by a curly-haired mechanic in turquoise coveralls and a spiky green dog that treats everyone like a friend.

The floor of the landing platform and the entryway is made of black-and-white tile, simple and elegant. The doors open for you as though sensing your approach, revealing a massive lobby decked out in golds and blues and blacks and silvers. The floor is the same black and white tile as the platform outside, although in here it is inlaid with silver-and-gold constellations. A massive winding staircase stretches up in front of you, facing directly across from the doors and spiraling up into the seemingly endless levels of floors. There shouldn’t be that many floors. There are rules to these things. But...maybe not in this place.

Two mechanical faceless spiders are waiting just inside to take whatever luggage you may have. They speak in chirping, polite voices.

There is a cat on the concierge's desk, blue-furred and six-eyed. It is not what it seems. It is a member of a species tasked with monitoring the time stream, and it has been exiled to this place for war crimes. It is the concierge.

When checking into the hotel, if you see the honeymoon suite is available, do not take it. It is a room full of bees. Other rooms are acceptable, although they may carry you to the ocean while you sleep or dissolve into nothing in the night.

Make sure to visit the cabaret during your visit. It is something you will never see the likes of anywhere else. There is a singer, a woman of nearly seven feet in stature, with ink-black skin and waist-length hair of every color imaginable. She sings songs of blood and fire and a hunt, and you cannot help but hang onto every word. There is a pair of dancers that appear humanoid when standing still, but when moving unravel into ribbons of silk that twist themselves into impossible shapes. There is a red-haired violinist with a snake tattoo winding its way across his temple and forehead, hiding a scar. He plays like he's dying, like this is the most important thing he will ever do, like the music is all that will be left of him. There is a card magician whose sleight of hand is so flawless you're convinced it is actually magic. When he smiles at you, captivated in the audience, you think you see pointed teeth.

You stop at the bar afterwards, receiving a drink from a green-skinned bartender with an 'ask for pronouns/any/all' pin. Also sitting at the bar with you is a woman in a long coat, a stylized wing design embroidered into the back. When you tell her you like it, she says that 'if i can't have mine, these ones will do'. She doesn't seem to want to speak further about it.

Everyone here has secrets, that is instantly clear. The building itself has secrets. There is a bottomless pit in the basement, and the janitor's closet opens upon a mass of tentacles. You peek behind the door labeled 'Staff Lounge' once, and find what appears to be the ruins of a vast palace. There is another door that you cannot bring yourself to open, although it seems to be following you, appearing at the end of every hallway you enter. You can hear sobbing behind it. You don't want to go in.

There is something living in the walls. Somethings, more specifically. They resemble tales you've heard of fairies, although these are built of scraps, of things left behind in the rooms. They steal your belongings, and you can hear them giggling in the night.

There is one resident who seems to have befriended these fairies, a dark-haired man in a wheelchair, goggles pushed up on his forehead, crimson-irised eyes sparkling with curiosity as he talks to the walls. He is shadowed by a broad, winged figure who observes everyone around him with distrust.

There's a pirate crew that stops by on occasion, led by a green-skinned captain resembling the bartender so closely that they can't be anything but siblings. They stay for a while, causing chaos and riding a dinosaur through the halls, and then they leave again for a while. They always return, however, and are greeted with a rare smile from the bartender and a roaring cheer from the woman with the winged coat whenever they do.

It becomes obvious that the staff cannot leave the hotel, although why you do not know. You watch the bartender watch their brother and his crew leave with longing in aer eyes, the anger that fills faer when it has to go back to work. You wonder if you can help. You cannot.

Despite all that you have seen, the most important thing about the hotel is the time jumps. They occur at random; one moment you're in the time period you were in when you arrived, and the next you are thousands of years in the future. And then the past. And then a time before anything even existed. The staff are clearly accustomed to this, and just sighs and marks down where the hotel has ended up in a heavy logbook.

You will never know who built the hotel, or even what it really is, but you do know as soon as you enter that it will stick with you forever. And sometimes, when you sleep, you will hear a little voice, urging you to return. And maybe you will listen. And who knows what happens next?

[cosmic-conundrums]

Coscon Intro: Characters Pt. 1

Hotel Staff

Xanther Paradoxica The Most High, Bearer of the Keys to the Past, Future, and Everything in Between, The Most Exalted Guardian of Time, And Also the Fluffiest (it/its) - the hotel's concierge, once a valued member of a council tasked with monitoring the time stream, was exiled for war crimes (some planets that weren't supposed to be wiped out under its command... were) and is now forced to work here. It's convinced it's too good for this job and often presents itself as superior to everyone around it. Resembles a blue/purple cat with six eyes and antennae. Whatever you do, do not call it cute. And do NOT touch its toe beans, as if you do you will end up seeing all of time at once and it may break your mind.

Tash Morgan (any/all) - tends the hotel bar, manages the kitchens. from an ocean planet, half-siren, was kidnapped and sold to the hotel at an early age and has been stuck there since. Has a brother who captains a dimension-hopping pirate ship, he drops by often to check in on them and try to figure out how to get aer out. Tash is often angry and bitter, due to her situation, and is always about two seconds from snapping. Deep green skin, short curly black hair, green eyes, 5'8

Globbet (he/him) - no one really knows what Globbet is, or where he's from. He's a cluster of tentacles with a pair of eyes peeking out of the center, and he works as a janitor. He is very polite and friendly. Everyone loves Globbet.

Lancelot (no last name given) (he/fae) - works as the hotel's resident mechanic, taking care of the guests' ships. Crashlanded on the asteroid one day on a mechanical dragon, gave no name other than 'Lancelot', and immediately took up residence with faer dragon in the garage, adopting the spiky green puppy that had been living there along the way. Hasn't left since. Light skin, freckles, curly blond hair, purple eyes, 5'5

Taryn Caliban (he/him) - Doesn't really have an actual job, does card tricks for the cabaret and occasionally runs card games down in the lobby for anyone who wishes to join. Helps out wherever he can, as he, in his own words, has 'nowhere else to go'. From a westernesque cowboy planet, and a town surrounded by monsters. Has intricate scars over his torso and arms, patterns of flowers and teeth and faces. Teeth are suspisciously pointy, but won't say anything about it.

[cosmic-conundrums]

Coscon Intro: Characters Pt. 2

Cabaret Staff

Eilyf (he/him) - plays the violin in the cabaret. does not know his own last name. grew up on a planet constantly at war, was forced into a program by the government that would help his side win the war. he betrayed his side, and was punished for it. he won't talk about what it did to him except to people he trusts deeply, but whatever it was it causes his brain to 'glitch' on occasion (these 'glitches' can range from him spacing out for a minute to him clutching his head and screaming for an hour). He has an odd knowledge of fucky time stuff, which makes him fit in quite well at the hotel. He's Tash's bff. red hair, green eyes, snake tattoo curving just over his left eyebrow and across his temple, covering up a jagged scar.

Vivenne Dumort (she/her) - singer. her songs tell stories in a way that make you feel like you're there, and always take an emotional toll on you. no one knows exactly where she came from or who and what she is, she gives a different story to everyone who asks. the one thing she does say is that she's on a mission, and intends to see it through to the end no matter what it takes. says friends can call her Enne, but whenever anyone tries to she glares at them and informs them that they are not her friends. She's 6'9, jet-black skin, hair that appears silvery-white at first but becomes every color of the rainbow when the light hits it right. she's constantly shadowed by a collection of miniature swirling voids that she refers to as the Voidlets. They act as backup singers, emitting strange otherwordly hums to accompany Enne's singing.

Sasha (she/they) & Swan (he/they/she) - twins, dancers. Once co-captained an exploration vessel sent out to previously unexplored sectors of the galaxy, often tasked with investigating unexplained phenomena such as planets disappearing and appearing out of nowhere. Their ship had a run-in with a weird black hole, and the twins were the only survivors. Now both of them have semi-insubstantial bodies that look normal when they're standing still, but twist into liquid-looking ribbons when they move. They're nearly identical, somewhat translucent skin, white hair, opalescent eyes, but Sasha is slightly taller.

Flerby (she/her) - Flerby is an 8-armed mechanical spider-thing that plays every instrument that isn't the violin. She's very sweet and lovely, everyone enjoys talking to Flerby. She also acts as a doorman, taking people's luggage if they have it alongside her fellow mechanical spider-thing Tim. Tim and Flerby can't lie. They have a very specific set of rules that they have to follow programmed into them, and if they go against that they will self-destruct. They're also HUGE. Well, not super huge, but almost 5 feet tall. So quite large. I love them.

[cosmic-conundrums]

Coscon Intro: Characters Pt. 4

The Snapdragon Crew

The Snapdragon Crew is the title I use for the crew of the Snapdragon, a flying dimension-hopping pirate ship that stops by the hotel on occasion for multiple different reasons. They often bring supplies and news from outside the hotel, as well as a chaotic presence and often a lot of fun. And a velociraptor.

(Captain) Atlas Morgan (he/him) - Tash (the bartender)'s brother, captain of the Snapdragon. Half-siren, he and Tash were hunted down for most of their early lives because of this. He was always the only thing Tash had, and he blames himself for when she was taken away from him and sold into working at the hotel. He spends a lot of his time researching the hotel and whatever power makes it so the employees can't leave, all so he can get his sibling out. He also has a 10 year old daughter that he is not allowed to see, due to her grandparents blaming him for his husband's 'death' (the circumstances surrounding his marriage and dead husband are. fishy). He's older than most other members of his crew, and has become something of a parental figure for the younger ones. (the crew is SUCH a found family). 6', dark green skin, curly black hair. Gills!!

Lily Weston (she/her) - first mate. The first crew member Atlas picked up, back when he still had a completely normal pirate ship. In fact, the Snapdragon was originally her ship, that Atlas stole from her. She chased after him, they ended up in a sticky situation together, and now he's the closest thing to a father she's ever had. 5' 11, short turquoise hair, eyepatch.

Adrian Riggs (he/him) - ship's surgeon, but also doubles as quartermaster when Lily or Atlas or both are overwhelmed. Goes by Riggs. Atlas's qpp. The second oldest crew member, but has earned the nickname of 'old man' because he acts a lot older than he is. A himbo but pretends otherwise. Has a cat named Duchess Henrietta. Covered all over in ragged stitches from an incident he doesn't remember. Whatever happened, it made most of his internal organs mechanical and gave him metal bones. He knows it was a big event in his life, but he doesn't remember what happened, and none of the crew know, because he never told any of them before he lost his memories. brown skin, black hair, dark brown eyes. 5' 11

Casey Beckett (xe/he/it) - boatswain. Goes by Beckett, unless one of the crew (especially xyr girlfriend) is mad at xem, in which case they call him Casey. Beck's honestly the most mischievous member of the crew, and gets into the most trouble. The others have often had to rescue it from some very ridiculous situations (he has earned the official title Thief of Velociraptors (more on that later)). But xe's also actually very very good at xyr job and is an expert at taking care of the crew or making sure they take care of themselves. In a romantic relationship with Lily, Kellan, and Lance. A natural redhead, but dyes its hair partially black. freckles. red eyes!! (like naturally red pupils they aren't contacts or anything). 4' 11. A tiny chaos monster I love xem so much.

Harley Morgan (she/they) - mechanic/weapons master. The youngest member of the crew. She took Atlas' last name when she joined the crew because they didn't want anything to do with their birth family. Trans. Often joins in Beckett's shenanigans because she loves the adventure (although she did not participate in the stealing of the velociraptor). She's really the only reason the ship is still running, because they're constantly repairing the mechanism that makes it able to jump dimensions. Blond hair, green eyes, 5'6.

Finlay (they/them) - cook. Actually an eldritch cosmic force that gained a humanoid form after an encounter with Riggs. They created their body and their name out of Riggs' memories, and in the process successfully erased that set of memories (this is why Riggs can't remember what happened to him). After this, Finlay joined the crew, as they had nowhere else to go and nothing else to do. Riggs feels that Fin is his responsibility, and is fiercely protective of them. Despite being an ancient cosmic force with pretty much unimaginable powers, Fin struggles with learning how to adapt to their new form and new life, and they actually really enjoy the adventure and experience they get with the crew. And if anyone or anything threatens that crew, they WILL go fully feral eldritch horror. Reddish-blond hair, 5' (tiny).

Tequila the Velociraptor (she/her) - a literal velociraptor. Like scientifically accurate with feathers and everything. Green. Beckett stole her from a dimension where the law enforcement had dinosaurs. She's been with the crew ever since.

Kellan and Lance (see previous character intros) are also honorary members of the crew, as they're dating Beckett and Lily.

[cosmic-conundrums]

Coscon Intro: Characters Pt. 3

Hotel Guests & Other Residents

Fable Rye (they/them) - 'building inspector', or so they would like everyone to believe. Crashed into the hotel in a seemingly official inspector's shuttle, emerged in a seemingly official inspector's uniform, but seem to have absolutely no idea what they're doing. Has tattooed numbers all across their arms and torsos, won't explain what they're for. Blue hair, 5' 2, black eyes with white pupils

Kellan Dawn (she/her) - captain of the Night Terror, whose crew is the restless dead. Claims she stole the ship and the crew from her home planet of Somnus, an infamously religious planet known for worshipping dreams. Also admits that Kellan Dawn is not her full name, but refuses to tell what it is as she 'wishes to spare myself from the embarrassment'. It apparently has many middle initials and extravagant titles. Spends most of her time at the hotel, so much so that she's practically a permanent resident, although she comes and goes as she is also busy running her side business of trading secrets. Is also dating Lance and two others (members of the Snapdragon crew, who have yet to be introduced here). Often wears a coat with a pair of stylized wings on the back. 5' 5, light brown skin, short-ish dark brown hair, purple eyes.

Kieran 'Kit' Fairley (he/they) - the hotel's resident scientist, or so he is described as by the staff and other residents. Has been there for quite a while, and is treated as something of a permanent fixture. Is determined to figure out the secrets of the hotel: how it was built, why it was built, how it works, why exactly it is the way it is. Can often be found wandering the halls, jotting down notes in a small notepad. walks with the assistance of crutches and occasionally uses a wheelchair, as his legs are partially crushed. Has definitely been spotted once or twice chipping off pieces of the wall and putting them in their mouth. 5' 5, dyed black and green hair (short and spiky). Dresses like a gothic vampire novel protagonist.

Rafaele (he/him) - last name unknown. True first name unknown, supposedly in a language no one but him can speak. Kit's 'shadow', can always be found at the scientist's side. Is fiercely loyal to them and loves him beyond anything else. 6' 9, reddish-brown skin, scaly in some places. Curly shoulder-length black hair. Horns!! Curvy ones, kind of spirally. Also has a massive pair of red and black wings. Wears tiny wire-framed glasses :) low-key a massive himbo

Assorted local cryptids!!! There is a tribe of 'fairies' living in the walls, tiny winged creatures that build themselves and each other out of scraps they steal from the guests. If you peek behind the door labelled 'Staff Lounge', you can sometimes see a figure with moth wings in the shadows. There is a man with horns who can be seen talking to the concierge sometimes, faint inky smoke always drifting off of him. And there is a patchwork ghost (or at least that's what they call him) haunting the building, watching, never there for more than a second. She seems to be waiting for something.