sadgirlqueenshit

[scarlettgauthor]

Happy New Year! I Buched a Noel!

So as someone who loves elaborate baking projects, I've always kinda wanted to bake a Buche de Noel, but I unfortunately never had the opportunity or occasion. It's just me, my wife, and our cats, and the cats can't help with eating a giant cake. (For their own health. They would love to help eat a cake if I let them.)

This year I decided that if I didn't have an occasion, I would make an occasion, so I invited some friends to my house yesterday for a "Please Help Me Eat This Buche De Noel" Party.

Y'all... I fucking delivered.

This incredible cake consists of a vanilla sponge with a vanilla buttercream frosting, brushed with maple syrup and filled with a maple custard whipped cream, decorated with maple meringues, maple sugar crystalized moss, sugared rosemary, and sugared cranberries. It tasted absolutely as good as it looked!

I'd never done a proper sponge (meringue folded into cake batter) before, and not everything was a total success (I tried to make maple spun sugar to use as the moss decoration, but I'd never done it before and something clearly went wrong, because it seized and crystallized, so I just used the tinted maple sugar as the moss which also looked great!), but I learned a lot in the process and I'm so, so happy with the outcome.

A portrait of the baker with her creation.

It was also a delight to get to share such an incredible baking success with friends on the last day of 2023. The energy was wonderful, and I'm going to try and take that feeling forward into the new year.

May your 2024 be full of friends, laughter, and elaborate, delicious creations!

[10000badframes]

Adventures in Macarons!

In my pursuit of media which is gentle and competes over low-stakes things if at all, I stumbled on the Great British Bake Off last year (or, as American TV would have it, the Great British Baking Show, because Pillsbury has a trademark on the phrase 'Bake Off.') Up until then, I did not consider myself passionate about baking, and I mainly used it either as a means to an end, or when I was trying to hold my own with my family at Christmastime (my mother and sister are genius bakers.) GBBO won my heart almost immediately, and in watching it over and over, the baking ethos integrated itself into my brain.

Last month, I asked my friend Mea if I could bake her anything for her birthday, and she said that she loves macarons. I'd seen them done a lot, and knew that they were notoriously finicky, highly temperature-dependent, timing-dependent, and even humidity-dependent. Because I'm a sucker for a challenge and have not yet entirely shaken my need for approval, I decided to give it a try. MARY BERRY, GIVE ME STRENGTH.

Since then, I have found out many things! Things that people didn't say in the recipes! I TRUSTED YOUUUU! I've tried macarons about twelve times now, and I think as of today, I've finally narrowed down where I went wrong the other 11 times. Here are some of the things which made the biggest difference.

1) It's all about the meringue. I tried the kind of meringue where you heat the sugar and then add it to the egg white, and I read a lot about whipping the whites at certain speeds for a certain amount of time. Honestly, though, it's about whipping room temperature egg whites at top speed and adding the granulated sugar gradually until it's glossy and holds a peak. Eyeballing it and erring on the side of under-whipping works best. I chronically over-whipped when I followed timed directions (i.e. ‘1 minute at 4, 2 minutes at 6′) and ended up with something that looked more like it belonged in a foam party than in a mixing bowl. I did fine with eggs which had been brought to room temperature by running them under warm water for a few minutes.

2) ALSO. I did not know that the addition of food coloring could affect a meringue as much as it does. There's something in standard food coloring which causes a reaction with the egg whites sometimes, and a promising meringue would go all foam party on me without over-whipping. I haven't yet had the courage to try adding food coloring to the meringue yet, but when I do, I'll be doing gel food coloring or nothing, because I know the powdered stuff and the standard stuff will wreak havoc on me.

3) On baking, it's not just about temperature (though it also is very much about temperature, and those store-bought oven thermometers will sometimes lie to you, as I found out the hard way.) In trials between an industrial baking pan - which is a little hollow all around the inside and larger - and a standard aluminum baking sheet, I found that the baking sheet made the feet rise faster and taller, and the bottoms lacier and more complete. Furthermore, spacing is important. Too close together, even if they're not touching, will affect the rise as well. They should have about an inch and a half to two inches of space all around on either side, and templates which dictate otherwise won’t get the best results. 

4) That whole 'lava' thing that they talk about in instructionals is legit, and you know you've reached it if the batter drops off the spatula and leaves a distinctive V shape behind it, or if you can draw a figure 8 on the surface of the batter with more batter, and it holds its shape for a bit. There was no distinctive difference, though, between shells which had been piped and allowed to rest for half an hour, and those which rested for forty-five minutes. I had been worried that the passage of time would affect them, and it doesn't, at least, not at that increment.

5) Other things which are legit: dropping the trays to knock the air bubbles out, the principle of resting in general, prodding them when it's time to take them out of the oven to see if the tops move over the feet (if they do that, they're not ready,) and letting the macarons 'mature' by piping the buttercream/ganache in, then letting it soak up into the shells for a day or so. Things which are not legit: smoothing the little nipples which form sometimes during piping with a wet fingertip. The ones I did that with developed weird little foamy hats. Also, moving the shells from one tray to another once they've been piped. It disrupted the skin enough that they came out all crackled.

Here is a link to the recipe which turned out best for me in terms of the shells. I made a fresh-squeezed orange buttercream to go inside, rather than the chocolate ganache, but that part's a little more open to interpretation. Happy macaron-ing, everyone! https://medium.com/@imaznation/how-to-make-my-favorite-earl-grey-macarons-ea457cbc2cb3