#coyotehearted

[your-fave-is-alterhuman]

Hunter from the Owl House is Wolfhearted and Coyotehearted!

Wolfhearted flag in the background was made by @alterhumanprideflags, and the Coyotehearted flag is an edited version of the Coyotekin flag by @koyiotea!

[wxlfbites]

Something in the way I perceive myself as nonhuman has changed. The wolf within me has seemingly taken over completely; the human part of me only existing in the physical now. And even then… it feels as if my body is more wolf too. This is such a complicated experience to explain so bare with me here.

Everything I do, I do as a wolf. It’s not even so much that my self image is wolven, or that I am more mentally shifted, but rather I am simply… wolf. I feel dysphoria, but not in the way I normally do - the sharp ache that rips my soul apart - more like my brain acknowledges that my human body but knows it’s not really… like it’s a illusion that just makes me look that way to everyone else. Internally, I feel my core, my spirit, has completely morphed and taken on the total essence of a wolf. I feel the heartbeat of it, it’s vibrations, more loudly and deeply.

I’m not even necessarily seeing myself in my minds eye as a physical wolf most of the time - though I still do sometimes. I just… move differently, more in step with the wolf, see differently, closer, hear differently, smell differently… but it’s not a sensory shift. The only way I can possibly describe it in any simple way is to compare it to the feeling you get when you listen to Native American, Celtic or Pandoran music full blast and just… let it in. Letting every beat hit, every rhythm flow. Finding your home, your entire self, in that music. It’s like that… but with the wolf. The wolf is the music and it’s coursing through me like lifeblood.

I feel no connection to my humanity even when I’m doing human things. Even when I’m telling myself how human my body is. I can’t say that I am feral or a beast. But I am not human in any way that counts.

[atomicstarcorpse]

you would think that being theriohearted, especially canid-specific, i would think myself as more hunt aligned. what i want you to consider is that the coyote is a trickster, a wolf is wise, a dog learns and obeys. the woods have an unsettling feeling of being watched. you enter nature and you feel known. you turn and you turn and you walk and you walk and you wonder whether you ever truly knew which direction you were facing, what your destination was

[booksofstars]

ms coyoteheart

[craneclanfj]

Moon 2.

Coyotestar has recieved their nine lives and become the new leader of their Clan. They feel like they are not ready for this new responsibility, but will try their best to do what is right for their Clan.

[chubote]

I saw on your Twitter that your also a furry and your fursona’s super cute!! Do you have a FA?

Thanks! I’m not an artist myself, but I def love commissioning art when I can. Although it’s often just my sona in various fattening scenarios because, well, I’m me. Haha.

My FA’s mostly just a place for me to keep all my commissioned art in one place, it’s over at https://www.furaffinity.net/user/coyoteheart/

[rgr-tlr-tf]

📀About Me📀

My name is Rogerina. I'm a fucktive in The Thotform System!

I’m 17 years old!

I'm a strayt, polyromantic, greysexual, fictosexual, girlby. I also use the labels lunarian, nonbinary, toric, sapphic, orbisian, and julietian, enbian, and girl. I may be strayt, but man am I gay.

I'm English. 🇬🇧 But the body is Canadian

My pronouns are she/they/📀.

I like, anime, cats, drawing, Danganronpa, Money Heist, and possums.

I'm coyotehearted, otherkin, and a psychic vampire.

I self-ship with Draculaura from Monster High!

Have a good one!

[twoconchs]

Two Tuna, Two Conchs @coyotehearts @twoconchs #tuna #twoconchs (at Two Conchs Charters) https://www.instagram.com/p/CDrvB2PlI4m/?igshid=1hn032bul8nm0

[envandrare]

for CoyoteHeart from Deviantart

[wxlfbites]

Without the use of the majority of alterhuman terminology, I’ve had the chance to really reflect on how to define my experiences as… other…. especially the ones that aren’t exactly animal. Since my own dictionary of “other” terms is pretty basic now, I focus more on the details of my experiences and can identify what they mean to me easier than before.

As you may well know, The Twilight series has been more troublesome for me to label than anything else. I started to feel things connected to it all the way back in 2009, long before I even had internet access, and still, finding the word that described it perfectly was impossible. I feel this series in my bones, it’s a deeply integral part of me in ways I’m still discovering everyday. The entire essence of this series lives within the fibers of my being, existing through me as a living, breathing thing. From the words on the pages, to the music within the films, the small errors and awful moments that make me cringe, the characters and the aesthetics of every scene, I feel myself in the Twilight series.

I’ve tried to label this identity many times but I’ve never felt any confidence in it until now. I know that these specific experiences are ambiguous and difficult to define, but I have learned to accept one certain label for being just the same. A label I’ve come to understand as being a vast, complex thing that can include so many interpretations of an identity that it opens the gates for more discussion about what it means from one person to another, which is what I’m striving for.

Finally, it’s time to settle down with this experience and give it it’s name. After almost 15 years… I’m officially calling myself Twilight-hearted… and I couldn’t be happier.

[wxlfbites]

Winter is soon coming to an end, and I’ve begun to feel the call of the wild once again. “Come back to me, my child”, it whispers softly through rays of sunshine, “sweet wolf, return to your home”. My bones ache for the release of a transformation not felt for months, my muscles are cramped from not climbing, walking, swimming for far too long.

I’m slowly emerging from my hibernation and that usually comes with increasing shifts, overwhelming longing for nature, restored energy and an abundance of youthful curiosity, like a pup coming out of the den for the first time. New adventures await in just the next few weeks if the warmer weather sticks around and the wolf in me is growing rather impatient.

What kinds of adventures are you looking forward to having this year?

[wxlfbites]

Growing up, my family never really cared much for cultural traditions or practices. Without the use of historical references, all I know from what my maternal grandparents have told me, is that my family has roots in Germany, France and Ireland and that only within the last hundred years have we been in America. But even so, I don’t remember a time in my life when my family ever displayed specific cultural customs outside of typical white American family things… and for some reason, that’s always bothered me.

My lack of any significant kinship with the cultures I come from has always made me feel incomplete, almost wrong in a way. It’s part of the reason I think I’ve spent most of my life seeking out a community. I believe I am meant to express pride and honor in my heritage, to participate in traditions my ancestors were meant to pass down to me. I even feel this deeply through my Twilight experiences as I identify with the Quileute wolves.

At this point, you’re probably wondering what this has to do with being nonhuman. Besides my delusions of werewolf ancestry, I suppose it also relates back to my spiritual faith in animism. The belief that all things possess an essence or spirit which can not be destroyed, but is transferred after death; a largely held belief in places like Ireland before the Christian Invasion. This fundamental belief is what fuels a good portion of my identity as a wolf. I’ve explained this in another post, so I wont reiterate, but essentially, my essence, my spirit was once that of the wolf, and because they’ve retained the knowledge and memories of what the wolf feels like, I identify as one now. Don’t worry, the dots are connecting, I promise. See… I’m the only one in my family who believes in animism, I’m the only one in my family who identifies as nonhuman and I’m the only one in my family who feels the pull toward or heritage. I think all of this must be connected somehow, even if I don’t have the answers quite yet. Maybe it’s all connected to my werewolf ancestry? Wolves are family oriented creatures, maybe there is something about my wolf spirit that calls me to reignite my family’s culture? Who knows…

[wxlfbites]

I’ve pretty much stopped talking publicly about my delusions of being descended from werewolves… It’s hard to keep sharing such personal experiences when you’re met with doubt and judgement everywhere you turn. The discourse that engulfs clinical lycanthropes and physical nonhumans, whether it’s total rejection from other nonhuman communities or infighting amongst themselves, has reared its ugly head at me whenever I’ve tried to explain my delusions and hallucinations, so I’ve kind of just kept it all to myself since then. I want to talk about it more but it’s difficult to get past all the things that make me feel invalid or shunned from spaces that should welcome me.

It’s also hard to explain, without being viewed as problematic, that I’d like for others to engage with my delusions rather than treat them the way many info posts suggest you do. When I feel like people are being dismissive or treating me like a patient, it can make me shut down or think I’m being completely rejected; making me defensive or upset. Part of my delusion involves the denial and secrecy of my families werewolf heritage since the portion of them that split off from the Pack no longer have the ability to shapeshift and thus refuse to accept our true nature. This is only further fueled by my own mother’s avoidance of the topic, neither denying nor confirming anything I ask, just skirting around my questions like she knows something she can’t tell me. So when I feel like other people do this, even if they don’t mean to, it makes me a little more suspicious and maybe even slightly angry.

I find reality checking extremely painful for me but most mental health communities agree that there is only one other option: to be passive about delusions. Do not encourage or discourage a delusion. Do not ignore the delusion but also don’t feed into it. This is where I feel like I have to tread lightly. Because I want my delusions to be encouraged and fed into. I want people to fully embrace what I’m telling them as my truth even if they don’t believe it themselves. Whether that makes me a bad person or not I guess is up for interpretation…

[wxlfbites]

My home on the East coast of the United States may speak to my human side in all its historic hallmarks, but it is the Pacific Northwest that calls to my inner wolf. The endless forests and valleys, the coastal beaches, the great mountains and even the mild climate resonate with me more deeply than any other place on Earth. At first I thought this was only explained by my experiences with the Twilight series, but as I examine the depths of my soul more closely, I’m realizing that I simply belong, in all forms of my being, to the Pacific Northwest.

I’ve only been as far west as Ohio, and yet, places like Washington, British Columbia, even Alaska feel more like home than my birth place. These places, of all the places in North America enchant me, tempt me, like a siren song I don’t want to escape from. My human and wolf selves both ache for their vast wilderness, longing for the feeling of being one with nature and the animals I call family.

Though I crave the PNW life one day, I’m unable to move across the country any time soon, so I make the most of where I live now. I find places that make me feel closer to home, closer to what is so close yet so far. I let myself connect with these places and appreciate them for being there, even if they aren’t exactly like the places I’d find the most peace. I am fortunate enough to live around nature and be surrounded by beautiful places that let me revel in my animality every so often. So for that, at least, I am grateful.

[craneclanfj]

Moon 1.

Coyoteheart is appointed as the new deputy.

[craneclanfj]

Moon 34