#dang i saw this on my Instagram and brought back a lot of old memories

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On Friday, April 27th 2018 at around 5:45pm my dog, Ollie, was lost to IMHA. If you’ve been following me for a while you’ve probably seen my posts about the fundraiser. It is still up on [gofundme] as well as some amazing [merch] for him that was created through the help of some amazing artists and @fiftyshadesofdes. The goal I wished to reach was $10000 to cover his costs and we reached around $1000. Since it has been a year now the need is not nearly as strong as it was, but if anyone has anything to spare it would be greatly appreciated. You can also directly send money to my paypal email which is HBader97@gmail.com if that is the easiest option for you.

Under the read more I am going to have lots of pictures of my baby boy as well as some amazing memories I have of him because he was, and still is super important to me. If you want to see additional pictures of him with cute in-character captions, I made him a [memorial instagram] that you can check out if you’d like to.

This was Ollie, he was supposedly a pomeranian/corgi mix but we were never really sure what he was. He weighed a whopping 10 pounds. The moment I saw him on the adoption agency’s website we got him from I was in love with him. We went to meet him and it was an instant click. He was around 6 months old when the adoption went through, he was my first, and so far my only, dog I’ve ever owned.

Ollie really was my best friend, he was always there for me when I needed a cuddle or some kisses. Or when he just really wanted to eat whatever food I was eating.

He was by my side a lot, always giving me a gentle look that he cared, when I was on my laptop in the basement he would move the baby gate at the top of the stairs and come down and just lay next to me. It made me feel safe and cared for, growing up in the environment I grew up in, he really helped keep me sane and I like to believe he knew that.

We hung out a lot, as he got older he took more and more naps, sometimes on top of me when I really needed to be doing something else. But he was the king and he would give me a grouchy growl if I ever tried to move him from where he was resting and stubbornly flop back down.

He liked to sleep on my bed with me, except he’d usually leave at some point because I toss and turn. He had a stash of pillows he’d stolen from me at the foot of my bed and usually ended up there. After my father took him on his morning walk he would barrel back downstairs full of energy and jump on me until I gave him attention then he’d go back to sleep after a little while.

One of my proudest accomplishments was training him. When we got him I was I think between 5th and 6th grade, I taught him how to sit, stay, lay down, roll over, beg, bow, crawl, dance, jump, give his paw, give his *other* paw, come, speak, as well as a few other fun things. One thing he was never good at was leash training, I guess all dogs have their quirks, but he was a pain to walk because he zoomed all over the place.

He really liked to watch me while I was doing anything. He’d give me a stare from a few feet away until I invited him over for some snuggles or he’d just insert himself in front of what I was doing until I gave him attention. One of the silliest things he did was he’d slowly walk towards me and I’d pretend not to see him and then when he was a foot away from me I’d whip towards him and he’d run away and it would repeat and repeat until he got so hyped he got the zoomies all over the place.

Ollie really enjoyed going on our beach trips with us, we took him for a walk on the beach in the late afternoon/early evening once during every trip. Last year was the first trip we spent without him and it was really hard to get through. I went on a walk by myself down the beach at sunset, full on crying because he wasn’t there with me.

If you’re not aware, I work with dogs. I’d bring him with me every so often. Since he was getting older as I got the job he wasn’t super into coming with me since he was a really little dog and wasn’t very experienced in playing with big dogs. He did have one dog he was friends with, a chihuahua mix named Ginger.

Ollie could have been a famous dogsplayer (dog cosplayer) if he wanted to be, he was already a perfect model for pictures. And so dang cute to boot.

I really feel, in some way, that he’s still watching over me. And I hope he knows I still love him with all of my heart. Ollie, you were the best thing to ever happen to me and I will never ever forget all the good and happiness you brought me. I hope you’re enjoying doggo heaven, or wherever else you ended up.

This was his collar, I wore it around my wrist when we left the hospital. I still have it sitting on a table by my bed, tags and all. Whenever I bump it and it jingles it hurts my heart. It no longer smells like him either since it’s been so long, but I can’t bear to ever get rid of it.

Ollie. I still love you. I hope you know that. I miss you so much, every day. I hope we meet again some day and we can make up for the time we weren’t able to spend together. Goodnight, my sweet angel.