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athyrabunlord · 8 years

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Daydream [IV]. Kanan

Reminder: This is based off of Daydream Warrior and this fanart I did Warning: Profanity, violence and sex. Ships: You>Chika>Kanan>Riko>?; with mentions of YouMari & KanaMari, and implied DiaYoshi & Maruby Words: 2,330

[I. Mari] [II. Chika] [III. Yohane] [IV. Kanan] [V. Dia] [VI. Hanamaru & Ruby] [VII. You] [VIII. Riko] [IX. ???]

IV. Kanan

“(But this illusion) has crumbled, hasn't it?” “It’s a bad dream.”

Kanan’s long, inky hair cascaded wildly over her back and shoulders like waterfall, creating menacing shadows that contradicted her serene expression. Clad in only tank top and jeans, she sat propped up against Chika’s bedrest with one toned arm draped over her drawn-up knee.

“Hey. You’re here.”

You barely heard her. She could only stare blankly at the mop of mikan-colored hair nestled against Kanan’s thigh. Chika was sleeping soundly, her hand loosely grasping the hem of Kanan’s tank top. The blanket slid down slightly at each even breath she took, revealing more of her naked shoulders and the hickies that blemished her skin. Her shirt, pants, bra and underwear were set in a neat pile near the foot of the bed, as if they were taken off one by one with great care.

You feels herself trembling from sheer rage and horror.

Yet before she could move, Kanan gently brushed away a strand of hair from Chika’s face, her gaze filled with fondness. “Shh, you’ll wake her up.”

Instead of a growl, a strangled whimper was all You could muster. “Don’t fucking touch her-”

“Didn’t I say?” Kanan peered at her through half-lidded eyes, her mellow tone belied the dangerous glint in those fathomless violet. “Let her dream.”

You was paralyzed, her throat parched as she helplessly stared at her beloved once more. She looked so content, wearing that endearing smile, like she was having the most incredible dream. Her cheeks were flushed and her hair mussed was in a way that covered her with seductive charm. She looked so enticing, so beautiful, and so very utterly taken.

Enveloped by the afterglow of sex, she looked like a total stranger.

You’s stomach churned in agony, refusing to accept the fact that Chika gave her innocence to someone as wretched as Kanan.

Or was it forcibly stolen?

“She was so sweet, and a bit shy,” Kanan murmured as she carefully extracted herself from Chika’s embrace, pausing when the younger girl shifted and snuggled. She only resumed moving and got off the bed when Chika’s breathing became even again. “She was so worried about not being able to please me… which she shouldn’t have to. All she had to do is let go, wouldn’t you agree, You?”

You couldn’t reply and couldn’t move, and she simply could not look away.

Kanan stretched languidly before tying her hair in a messy ponytail. She smiled at Chika again and gingerly tugged at the blanket to cover the sleeping girl, mindful not to disturb her dream. “Yeah, she was so warm, so sweet…”

You marched up to Kanan and threw a punch before she knew it. The taller girl blocked her fist and gripped it tightly, the ghost of a smile still present on her relaxed visage. Growling, You sent an uppercut towards Kanan’s chin but her arm was knocked aside as well. You then jerked forward as if about to headbutt Kanan, who instinctively leaned back to avoid the attack. Using the blind spot created by this maneuver, You buried her fist in Kanan’s stomach and successfully broke free of the latter’s vice grip.

Kanan coughed and took one step backward, but otherwise she appeared unfazed by the attack. You clenched and unclenched her fists, as if to savor the sensation of hitting flesh. In spite of her heart thundering in her ears and her blood boiling beneath her skin, she felt eerily calm. There was a string of expletives at the tip of her tongue, ready to curse Kanan into oblivion, yet nothing left her lips.

She just wanted to hurt. Whether to hurt Kanan or herself, she did not know. Her heart ached so much that she was numb to every other feeling, except for that fleeting exhilaration when she managed to strike Kanan. She needed something more, an actual pain, to truly feel again.

The fact that Kanan was merely watching her made that horrible void even worse. Why wasn’t she attacking back? Why did she appear as if she knew everything, as if she understood?

Was that… pity in her eyes?

What, pitying her, because she had claimed Chika? Was that it?

How dare she.

You closed their distance and punched again and again, wildly and unreservedly. However, Kanan either parried or dodged her attacks, her expression never-changing. There were many openings yet the taller girl didn’t strike back, not once. All You could feel was Kanan’s gaze, as fathomless as the ocean, observing her every movement.

Say something, do something! You roared through her fists and glare, but somehow she was unable to actually let it out of her throat.

Chika was still sleeping. She did not want Chika to see her like this.

After a while, You’s relentless onslaught finally cornered Kanan against the wall opposite of the bed. As if possessed, You picked up a nearby stool and swung it with all her strength.

The wooden limbs snapped with a nauseating thunk and the pieces clattered onto the floor.

A manic grin lit up on You’s face as her opponent staggered and collapsed. She glanced at the cracked stool leg in her hand and its mesmerizing sharp edges. Before she could make another move though, she heard a very unsettling sound.

Kanan was laughing.

Even as blood trickled down her face, she continued to chuckle, sounding truly amused as if they were laughing over a bad joke. You breathed heavily, her arm frozen in mid-air with the broken wooden leg held high. She couldn’t bring herself to deliver a potentially fatal blow to her foe, but she couldn’t drop the weapon either.

She loathed Kanan, despised her so much that she had fantasized many horrific scenarios. But now that she had the opportunity to realize her darkest desire, she hesitated.

Suddenly, she even forgot why she hated Kanan in the first place.

Was it because of Chika? Because of Mari? Or-?

“Do you know how much Chika-chan loves you?” You choked out, her fingers curling tighter around the broken stick. She was mortified by how pathetic she sounded.

“Yeah. I know,” Kanna said flatly. The smile was gone from her bloody face.

“And Mari-chan… you’re important to her too, y’know?”

“Mari is important to me too.”

You could feel her nails digging into her clenched fist, the sharp pain barely suppressing her anger. “Then… what… the fuck… are you doing…?”

“I thought you of all people would understand me best, You,” Kanan rasped as she slowly stood up and approached the trembling girl until they were one step apart.

“Me…?”

“I just want to wake up from this nightmare.”

Torn between the urge to laugh and scream, You threw away the stick and snarled like a wounded animal. “What kind of bullshit is that? What the fuck does that even mean? Screwing around with Mari-chan? Now Chikan-chan too! What the fuck, Kanan, just what is all this? I thought you love Riko-chan?!”

You didn’t notice the slight widening of Kanan’s eyes and how they darkened and blanked ominously.

“Chika-chan trusts you! Fuck, even I trust.... I believe you love Ri-”

Stars burst behind her eyelids as pain exploded in her jaw. She blinked up at the ceiling a moment later, still disorientated as to how she ended up on the floor. Kanan’s silhouette loomed menacingly over her fallen form for a while, the silence thick and the tension frigid.

“Stand up.”

You shakily wiped her chin, growling at how slick her own blood felt against her skin. She lunged at Kanan’s legs, using the momentum to pull and pin the older girl onto the floor. The revolting vertigo filled her senses when Kanan rolled with the tackle and threw her to the side. A swift but hard kick dug into her stomach, making her retch and curl up involuntarily.

“Get. Up.”

You glared up at Kanan and, frankly, was frightened by how the latter looked at her. It was not hot-blooded rage and indignation like the thugs You had defeated in the past. There was no emotion in those violet eyes. No sorrow, no anger, nothing. Something else was in that hollow gaze though, a chilling intent that she couldn’t quite decipher.

Scoffing, You spat out blood and tried to keep up with her bravado. However, each and every one of her punches were blocked and countered and she repeatedly got struck to the ground.

And every time, Kanan told her to get up, before knocking her down again and again.

Perhaps she truly was a masochist, for she fell into a rather pleasant daze from the bone-aching bruises that must be forming from Kanan’s fists. The pain was keeping her mind from wandering and she could actually feel her body, instead of that floating sensation as she trudged through every day

How pathetic was this? She was getting her ass handed to her by the person she hated, and she actually felt like laughing?

A mad grin lit up on her face. Was this why Kanan was laughing earlier? Fuck, she was right, maybe she did understand her the most?

You’s smile became twisted in agony when Kanan hauled her up by her collars and slugged her face. A strange buzzing resounded in warning in her mind and her eyesight blurred as she peered at her opponent, who raised her fist slowly for one last hit.

Ah, so Kanan wanted her dead. She could see it now.

“K-Kanan-chan, no!”

The grip loosened around her collars and she dropped bonelessly onto the floor. Out of the corner of her dimming vision, she saw Chika grabbing Kanan’s arm and attempting to push the older girl away. Her legs were bare and the overly-large shirt drooped to one side, revealing one shoulder, as if she threw on one piece of clothing in a hurry before coming to intervene.

Grunting, You agonizingly sat up. ‘Get away from that person, she’s dangerous!’ was what she wanted to say, but only a hacking cough left her mouth. Chika spun around and hastily crouched by her side.

The sight of Chika’s tears and horrified expression hurt more than her wounds.

“Y-You -chan? D-Don’t talk okay? We’ll get you… both of you to the hospital. I-I’ll grab something to s-stop the bleeding…”

“No need. Tend to her, Chika. I’ll leave.”

Chika flinched but she stayed by You’s side. “But, Kanan-chan, y-you’re hurt too, and-”

“It’s okay. Stay,” Kanan crouched down as well. “Unless, you want to come with me?”

To You’s surprise, Chika shook her head, and that was when You was aware of the crying girl holding her hand.

Kanan smiled at her then, a soft and charming sort of smile that lacked any malice. “You’re such good girl, Chika.”

It was the same opinion as You’s, but hearing it coming from Kanan filled her heart with bitterness. How dare she share the same sentiment?

“I-I’m not,” the mikan-haired girl sniffled and squeezed You’s hand. She noticed Chika was shaking and borderline hyperventilating.

“You are.” Kanan gently pulled her to a hug and gradually, Chika’s shallow breathing became even. You could only watch helplessly, her consciousness flickering a little until she realized she wasn’t going to pass out into blissful oblivion any time soon. She felt like an outsider, really, seeing how perfectly Chika melted into Kanan’s embrace.

“W-What happened?” Chika whispered feebly and peered up at the taller girl. “No, rather, why did you two-?”

Kanan tenderly cupped her cheek and leaned close as if to kiss her, but paused and only placed a soft kiss against her forehead. “All I can say is, I’m sorry for what happened here, for messing up your room. It’s better... that I go now.”

“Wait, Kanan-chan, don’t-”

The older girl shook her head and caressed Chika’s disheveled hair before stepping out of the room. She was biting down her lips to muffle her whimpers, her body trembling in great distress.

You cursed herself for unable to comfort the girl she loved, not even a simple hug.

After a deep breath, Chika began to dab and wipe at You’s bloody face, using her long sleeve. Inadvertently, You glanced at her exposed shoulder and thighs and the hickies that marked her.

Something ugly flooded You’s chest.

“I thought you don’t want anything in return?” Though her voice was hoarse and slurred, she knew Chika heard her clearly. Her mind was screaming inside, for her to stop, for her to just hug the distraught girl. This wasn’t Chika’s fault. She mustn’t lose it on Chika. Chika was just a victim. All the blame should be on Matsuura Kanan.

Chika smiled brokenly and gingerly lowered her hand. “You’re right, You-chan. I’m so, so, sorry. I wasn’t… I didn’t plan to…”

See, it was all Kanan’s fault. She must have coerced or seduced Chika somehow, using her feelings for sex. You sighed shakily and was about to reach for Chika’s hand when the latter’s words froze her.

“But when we… when she held me, I-I realized how much I wanted…” Chika sobbed and hid her face behind her face as if ashamed. “I so wanted to be s-someone to her. I so wanted to be l-loved in return too, so I-I…”

“You lied to me.”

“W-What?”

You coldly stared at Chika’s bewildered and tear-stained face. “Before, when we were shopping, when you got that music box, you gave me that whole speech and… what a fucking idiot I was, for believing your words! You didn’t want anything in return, heh… well, in the end, you’re just human. Right, that’s better this way, actually.”

“Y-You-chan?”

“Like you, Chika-chan, I’m only human.” You ignored the warning voice in the back of her cloudy mind. She roughly grasped at Chika’s shirt and pulled.

“Wha-”

Chika’s lips tasted salty like tears and coppery like blood.

You’s broken phone lays forgotten in the corner, the anchor keychain stained with maroon.

#athyra writes #chikanan #chikayou #well it's really youchika and kanachika #-feels guilty #poor mikan >_>#the muscle duo.. eh they can handle the abuse from this mean writer #lololool #finally updated after so long \0/#difficult chap to write for a reason #maa at least I can move onto the next 'arc'#5 chaps left to this story /0/#if anyone's still reading it #I've been told the complicated relationships between each char's too much lawl #alas that's what DaydreamWarrior inspired me to write so #¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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