garazeblaszane

[c0rpsedemon]

no i'm still thinking about the annoying ass forums that class makes us do . the fuck do you mean there should only be one Deaf university, do you know how many Deaf ppl are out there? and idc if my grade is being held hostage i'm not playing devil's advocate for fucking oralism babe .

[hzcleski]

dylan o’brien. cis male. he/him.  ／ hal zaleski just pulled up blasting 6 god by drake— that song is so them! you know, for a twenty-three year old nhl player, i’ve heard they’re really crass, but that they make up for it by being so protective. if i had to choose three things to describe them, i’d probably say bruised knuckles, sharp turns in a worn pair of ice skates, and blood dripping from a menacing smile. here’s to hoping they don’t cause too much trouble!

nathan harold zaleski iii was born ( practically with a pair of skates on ) in toronto, ontario. he’s third in a line of hockey royalty that started with his grandfather nathan i, in the 70s and 80s ( most notably with the montreal canadiens ), then continued with his father nathan ii, in the 90s and 00s ( most notably with the detriot red wings ). both were legendary defenseman in the nhl with several stanley cup wins and a olympic gold medals to their shared name.

so, no pressure right? nathan iii aka hal, has spent his entire life training to play hockey. he could skate before he ever knew how to walk and was taught how to hold a hockey stick before he was ever taught how to hold a pencil. he was barely homeschooled so that absolutely nothing would get in the way of his training in his formative years, casually had living legends coming over this house for dinner every other week, etc.

his parents divorced when he was ten years old, which he handled remarkably well for a kid his age but he honestly...couldn’t remember a time when his mother and father ever seemed genuinely happy or even as if they genuinely liked one another.

after the divorce and a messy custody battle, hal wound up staying with his dad, who was traded to the new york rangers on the very last leg of his career. his mom moved back to poland ( where she was from ) and he and his dad moved to nyc. a couple years later, when hal was twelve, his dad officially retired from the nhl and soon after married the mother of sabrina miller. she and hal hit it off right away and even though their parents would eventually divorce, the two are still close and hal still refers to her as his sister.

hal and his father attended the 2010 winter olympics in vancouver and because of who his dad was, he got to be all up close and personal with team canada which was equal parts thrilling and nerve - wracking, but overall he had a great time and after that experience, he became more serious than ever about hockey.

he went back to nyc after the olympics were over and, thanks to ages and ages of endlessly begging his dad, finally got to attend “a real school”.

it was there that he would meet isabel nichols, an accomplished figure skater who...absolutely hated his guts. at first. the two grew on one another and began dating, which eventually led hal to propose when they were uhhhh. seventeen

she was training for the sochi winter olympics and wound up breaking off their engagement during the actual games. isabel sorta dumped him w/o any explanation whatsoever so it kinda came out of nowhere for him, and this was basically the event that turned him into the fuckboy that we all know and begrudgingly tolerate today!

so idk how getting drafted into the nhl works bc idk anything abt sports and looking it up on google just confused me BUT what’s important here is that when hal was drafted into the nhl, he first played defense for the edmonton oilers before being traded to, again, play defense the new york rangers about which is where he still is now.

so around this time is when hal and his dad have a HUGE falling out. it had basically been building up since the day he was born so when it finally exploded...whew! all of the pressure that his dad has put him under his entire life, all of the pushing and prodding and nothing he ever did being good enough...it was allllllll thrown out there into the open and they’ve never really recovered from it. hal’s dad is basically just a big sore spot for him that he doesn’t really talk about. ever.

back to hockey, he’s still a big fan favorite and considered to be kind of a golden boy type despite being known for getting into fights on the ice and racking up endless penalties. it’s the kind of rebellious edge that people LIVE FOR. it also helps that he is, in fact, a really talented player.

injured his knee during a game in late march of 2019 and he was out for the rest of the season in order to recover which KILLED HIM he was MISERABLE but he’s been given the all clear to play once preseason starts and he’s so excited that he’s practically counting the s e c o n d s until september 18th

he’s technically married to genesis iver buuuut as far as 99% of people know, they’re engaged with their january wedding date on its way! their story is kinda Messy bc that’s their brand but basically friends to lovers to husband and wife and they’re v in love so it’s super sweet and all.

fun facts !

born on december 31st which makes him a capricorn!

he was mostly raised by his nanny, angeline, so tbh he was never really that close to either of his parents. in fact he hasn’t seen his mom in person since she moved back to poland when he was ten buuut she does call him sometimes

also - hal speaks fluent ( canadian ) french! angeline was from quebec, so it’s actually his first language. little known fact! he knows a few words in polish too but he’s not at all fluent.

his english is very good but tbh that’s probably part of the reason why he never did so well in school besides the fact that it just wasn’t his focus and i’m kinda sad now that i think about this aw :(

he’s ambidextrous it’s v cool

freak of nature athlete who will literally go to the gym at 5am to get ready for his 7am practice and a big physically imposing guy soooo 0/10 probably do not try to fight him

tbh the only sport he cares about besides hockey is basketball he’s a raptors fan

kind of a hothead but he keeps it in check and tbh otherwise his personality is amiable and even kinda...goofy. basically, outside of his regularly scheduled fuckboy activities he tends to be chill and calm and he’s actually a very genuine person.

basically him and gen together can seem SO CONFUSING bc the two seem like complete opposites in every single possible sense of the word but idk that’s true love for ya i guess

a total Dumb Jock Stereotype™

he’s basically a golden retriever in a backwards snapback

[babblingbat]

Various Characters I meant to post Months ago

Various Characters of mine

I have so many I want to write (some) of them down! This is a suuuuuper long post so more under the cut! Includes a spy, a crime lord/activist, and a bargaining warlock (I have to reblog this later bc tumblr threw a hissy fit about the length)

X

- Kinda in a Bond-esque spy agency, but more of a contractor

- When everything goes to shit, you can count on them to fix it

- Nonbinary protege of whoever is in charge of the tech division (Mezza? Sloane? Dixon? idk, but they have a hell of a shady past and there’s like… noooothing that can keep Sloane out of computer systems)

- X isn’t formally recognized by APO (authorized personnel only, the spy agency) but they do have access to all information because of a backdoor Sloane made

- So I guess the name is Sloane

- Anyways, X goes on the black ops of black ops, typically with either mercenaries or no back-up at all

- Thus trust issues and like the opposite of dependency - they have so much trouble asking for things but are willing to help anyone or offer material assistance - if they have it

- X is nonbinary and really doesn’t have any preferences on pronouns, as long as they aren’t he/him or she/her

- They’re also autistic and shut down if there’s too much loud noise or if they’re just too tired for some reason - sometimes this means going nonverbal or just Not Functioning and their favorite way to feel better is to sit on the ground, wrap themselves in a blanket and listen to music - so in conclusion they don’t really use guns unless there’s a silencer, and they aren’t v good with them

- A huge part of their espionage function is language!

- They speak German, Spanish, Japanese, FSL, and ASL all idiomatically

- They also speak Russian, French, and Afrikaans, but not fluently

- They can swear and count to ten in Korean and Czech

- They’re pursuing a PhD in computational linguistics, though APO gets in the way

- They’re 24, and have a bizarre set of skills because both of their job, previous jobs and jobs they hold as a cover to pretend they pay their taxes, and special interests

- Sloane is only 7 years older than them, and recruited X out of high school

- At first it was small things, like ‘pick up this book from Elm Street and drop it at Main’ but it got bigger after they graduated

- When X turned 18, they went through formal training - protocol, combat, and analysis

- They’d done some martial arts before hand, but not much punching, mostly kicking, throws, and staffs (5 and 6 feet)

- X’s main job is to clean up messy situations, usually by stealing things or extractions, and their own ops are less combat oriented than the clean ones

- X is not the best at math, not by a long shot, but they can see patterns from a mile away

- “I am the fact guardian, guardian of the facts!” “Puzzles quiver before them!” “FUCK OFF”

- They do simple division when bored and solve a lot of math things by finding patterns and using them

- X is both their designation in the agency (as in ‘x factor’) and their actual name- they use an alias for college

- They live with a few people, most of whom complain at their erratic sleep schedule and ask that please, for the love of god, X gets sleep meds and just a solid 8 hours, for once

- Sloane eventually sends X on an op to extract Mel, Sloane’s girlfriend and top operative

- X doesn’t know what to tell Mel, so mostly they just tell them that things will be answered later

- Mel asks Sloane, who reluctantly explains X’s role, and this sets some things into motion of X eventually being brought into the spotlight

- They have several hearings about their activities

- Eventually, Seville (who runs things? I guess) tells them to carry on as they do, reporting directly to Sloane, but they are recognized now by the APO

- There are three other things I want to fit in:

- Goes missing for [period of time], leaving a very close friend behind, comes back after being presumed dead and no memories, apparently solved a conspiracy and now has many illegal friends who all enjoy thievery

- Magic is a thing (because it wouldn’t be my words if it wasn’t lmao) and common enough that people know it exists but rare enough that it’s kinda intimidating and sometimes people will freak out about it, despite plenty of people having it.

X has/develops magic at some point but is terrified to tell anyone and tries to hide it from their team (which is now their family, love that trope) because they don’t want to be barred from the APO, but it comes out accidentally during a mission

- X’s infodumping saves the day somehow

The Celestian

- K so this is more about an organization, but the Celestian lives in a like a 1920s fantasy setting and likes dancing

- They run a social activism group masquerading as a crime network that uses queer bars and stuff as fronts

- To get money, they dance competitively with their bodyguard and d8m8, the BFF (butch femme fatale) who identifies as a nb lesbian

- To get into any of the places where actual political dismantling and activism happens, who have to have very specific patterns on your nails - nail painting is a method of communication and is also a huge teambuilding exercise

- There are different codes for everything

- When cops try and get in (they can only find the places if they have a member of the Queer Folk), the code is “blue denim” and then the person caught tells the police they need nail polish and then laugh as they get caught, as if they were bullshitting the whole thing

- Other things are called “10:50 am” which looks like a sleepy eye

- Or “songbird rhapsody” which is also a popular song that the Celestian sings at clubs

- Or “money” which is just a green splotch on all the nails

- If you’re a member of the Queer Folk, you get a crate monthly of money and nail polish, and special things on birthdays and holidays

- The Queer Folk do everything from organize protests to take kids in and try to pay for their education through crime - as in robbery from different places

- Their crimes always have a certain flair to them - they value creativity and snazziness

- The Celestian is like 5’ 3” (which, to be fair, is 3 inches taller than I am) and the BFF picks them up a lot

- They don’t like alcohol or caffeine but drink herbal tea 24/7

- If they don’t, something is very, very wrong

- They have a prosthetic leg

Red

- Literally in high school

- A warlock! They traded their gender and all “gender identifying features” to a trans demon for magic powers

- The demon mostly asks them to get coffee and stuff because the demon isn’t very good at bargaining and just wanted Red’s gender, but it’s expected of a patron to keep using the warlock for things

- (on the demon phone) “hey so this is super duper important and if you could get it in the next half hour that’s the best thing”

“what is it”

“alright so go to the corner of Lincoln and Greenleaf, turn three times to your right, once to your left, and a door should open behind you. Don’t try to turn towards it, just fall backwards”

“if I fall onto poison ivy or concrete I’m breaking my fucking contract”

“No, no no no, you’ll appear in that good good heaven spot”

“… the coffee shop?”

- Red focuses on science in their school

- Every interaction is a deal. E V E R Y I N T E R A C T I O N

- Breakfast? “I’ll give you the salt if you hand over the pancakes”

- Entering a building? “Hold the door open and I’ll give you praise”

- School? “You want me to tell you what I do in my spare time? Give me an A on my midterm and I’ll tell you”

- The last one has left a lot of teachers confused and more than a little scared of the silly little nerd in their class

- Honestly, they have straight A’s because they make deal after deal about grades. They never cheat on tests, but they make deals, hold people to them, and know what they’re doing

- Red’s demon is getting a little worried with all the deals

- Red is most accustomed to deals rather than anything else because they think that unequal exchange (i.e., gifts) is really suspect

- That said, Red has no problems altering “equal” exchange to benefit them

- If they ever became a business owner, they would be terrifying

- They want everything to turn out the best it can for every one but… are not fans of laws

- They have many Opinions on law, its enforcement, and the government

- That cousin that will tell you constantly about how the government is corrupt and should be rebooted with the youngest people as the primary interest

- Anarchy? Not quite, but revolution? Most definitely

- No angst, just high school silliness and chaos

- Has no idea what’s going on 90% of the time - a kid on a sportsball team did something amazing, people started treating him like shit for adults liking him, and Red had no idea until like 3 months later

- Red just kinda lives in their head

- Did they hear what you just said? Nah, but they sure did hear that wristwatch every time it clicked on the second.

- Likes the sound of adventure, but mostly gets lost in Ikea and makes deals with the eldritch monsters in the mattress section

- SUCH A SHITTY SENSE OF DIRECTION, COULD GET LOST IN A GRID WITH MAPS AT EVERY INTERSECTION

- Charismatic, but mostly in the sense of lying their ass off and persuading people

- Once tried to go a day without making a deal (on a dare), ended by making a deal to not have to ever do that again

- Businesses both hate and love them - they pay for nothing but will bargain away odd things of equivalent value every time and catch shoplifters, dislikes shoplifters because it’s not a fair trade

- Bizarrely good luck with finding things in pockets, particularly to “pay” for things