#do i tag ezio??? naaahhh

[teecupangel]

Nothing has made me feel like I'm Ezio more than watching people go crazy over coins I threw in the air as part of our New Years party.

[teecupangel]

On the badtouch templar idea, just how bad is the Pazzi-Auditore rivalry pre- and post-Dec. 29, 1476?

Badtouch Templars AU! (main idea, the Auditores and the Borgias)

The Auditores’ relationship with the Pazzi could be summarized as ‘pulling the pigtails’ kind. Giovanni didn’t immediately think they were Templars because they were rival bankers and more of a nuisance than an actual threat to the Medici family.

Then Vieri and Ezio had a one night stand before becoming bitter rivals who may or may not kiss and hatefuck once in a while and Giovanni just chalked that up to teenage hormones.

So when he got evidence that the Pazzi were in on a very serious and dangerous plan to take out the Medici, he jailed Francesco out of caution. When Francescao started making comments of how Giovanni needed a firm hand to guide him, well… red flags are being raised by then but he still needs proof.

The Auditore arrest still happens though and Giovanni will never stop beating himself for simply dismissing the Pazzi’s previous actions as ‘meh’ instead of ‘Templars! Absolutely Templar badtouch!’ but, in his defense, the Pazzi’s badtouch didn’t really start amping to Templar level until they showed their true colors.

In a nutshell:

Vieri absolutely carries a torch for Ezio but, in this case, Ezio has an upper hand in their ‘relationship’. Also, Ezio has had a threesome with Vieri and his sister, Viola… the joke of Ezio fucking Viola once that enraged Vieri was because he was mad that Viola got to fuck Ezio without him.

Claudia hates Viola because she’s super clingy whenever they meet during noble gatherings and even in the streets. She assumes Viola is into Ezio and is trying to be close to Claudia to get to him. Viola wants Ezio AND Claudia. (She may or may not be a Templar BUT she’s definitely a Pazzi with the hots for the Auditores)

Francesco definitely wants Giovanni, half because, come on, it’s Giovanni, and half because he wants what Lorenzo has

Jacopo thinks Giovanni is a lost cause but his children, especially Federico and Ezio could still be ‘saved’.