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hannahssimblr · 4 months

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Chapter Eighteen

Back in Clontarf, I perch at the gleaming, marble island while Jude prepares dinner. I watch him doing it with undisguised interest, because he cooks the way that I imagine he makes art, fully absorbed, with precision and confidence, and completely and utterly in the flow of his own enjoyment. He connects his iPhone to a Bluetooth speaker and plays music for a while, until Ivy bursts in and complains that she can’t focus on her homework with all of the noise.

He switches it off for her, but even in the silence he moves around to the beat of the music in his head, with a smile on his face that only endures the more stupid questions I ask him about what he’s doing. He’s making a spice mix in a pestle and mortar, he’s coating the fillets in flour, that’s actually rose water, not vanilla, yes, he taught himself how to do this, those flowers are actually totally edible, they’re not just there to look good, so a shallot is actually stronger than an onion, that’s why he’s using it. He prepared a lot of it earlier, marinating fresh fish in harissa for hours, and par boiling the potatoes so that they’d be oven ready by the time we got home from visiting Jen, and when I ask him where he found the time to do all of this he explains that he was simply procrastinating, because he doesn’t want to write his thesis.

We eat at the dining table with Ivy, who shovels the food into her mouth in the span of about five minutes despite her complaints about it tasting bad, and gives a series of very bored, one word answers to his questions about school in between mouthfuls. He reminds her that she should practise for her piano lesson tomorrow and tells her that he can’t collect her from afterschool hockey so she’ll have to get the bus. It occurs to me that this is perhaps the most un-sibling like relationship I’ve ever witnessed. Perhaps it’s a symptom of their age gap.

“Where’re your parents tonight?” I query once Ivy rushes off to her bedroom to reconvene whatever teen girl things were interrupted by dinner, and he looks down at his plate. “Working late again.”

“Seems like they really like to work.”

“They sure do. Or they really like not having to be in this house.”

He’s said things like this to me before, these kind of vaguely troubling statements about his parents in very casual, matter of fact ways, as though they’re entirely absent and have no love for each other whatsoever, and this is something he finds normal. I’ve never asked him about it before, and something I’ve never quite been able to handle the idea of broaching, but now, since we’re… kind of, sort of going out with each other it suddenly feels important to know whether his expectations for his own relationships are different to his parents’ strange marriage.

“What is it about them?”

“We don’t have to discuss these grim things about my family, it’s alright.”

“We don’t have to, but I think I’d like to know about it.”

He pushes his food thoughtfully around his plate. “They just shouldn’t have gotten married, I suppose. I think they meant well initially but it’s ultimately done more damage than good.” He glances towards the closed door and up towards the ceiling, where his sister is, and lowers his voice a little bit. “I think they’ll probably get a divorce as soon as Ivy finishes school.”

“Oh.”

“I’m the reason they’re married, and she’s the reason they’re still together. They had this amazing idea at one point that having another child would solve all of their issues, but now they’ve just trapped themselves in a bind for an extra nine years. They could be blissfully divorced by now, but they won’t do it until she’s moved out, because they don’t want to disrupt her schooling.”

“How old were they when you were born?”

“Nineteen and twenty one.”

“Oh, God.”

“Yep, big mistake. Whoops.” he tosses a chunk of potato into his mouth and leans back in his chair. “Mom finished school and went to stay with her aunt in America, took up a job at a department store in Albuquerque, hooked up with a med student at a bar on her first month there, and well…” He throws up his hands in mock celebration. “Here I am!”

“I suppose that being unmarried with a child wasn’t really an option for your mother at the time.”

“No, not at all, I mean, she had come from catholic Ireland. She didn’t think she’d ever be able to live at home again unless she married the man from that bar.” The way he speaks about his father is strange, as though despite his presence in their lives, he’s still some random, nameless med student from San Bernardino.

“And then what?”

“Well, then my dad continued school, and my mom began her studies and my great aunt took care of me on and off until my dad got his doctorate degree. Then they had Ivy, on purpose, by the way, and when she was a baby we moved back here.” He shrugs. “That’s all.”

I breathe out a laugh. “You’re so cagey.”

“Am I?”

“Yeah it’s like you don’t want to talk about them, or your home life, like, ever.”

He doesn’t look like he’s all that bothered by my interrogation, he just gives me this self-effacing little smile. “Come on, Evie. It’s because this stuff is boring.”

“I don’t think it’s boring at all.”

“Well, okay. They didn’t want to be together, they shouldn’t have had kids, and they act like they never did because they barely parented either one of us. Has anyone ever told you that you’re bad at letting things drop?”

“Yeah, loads. Has anyone ever told you that you’re bad at talking about serious things?”

“Of course.” The corner of his mouth quirks up and he lifts my arm from the table to kiss the inner part of my wrist. “Has anyone ever told you how pretty you are?”

“Yes, you. Tell me what it was like for you when you were growing up.”

“I’ve told you loads about my childhood already though.”

“Yeah, you have, and I loved hearing about how badly behaved you were and what it felt like to live in America, but I wish you’d get into the guts of it, the real stuff.”

“The real stuff?”

“The stuff that makes you so clearly sad. You get that look on your face whenever it comes up.”

He hasn’t let go of my wrist, and now his thumb is gently stroking the skin that he kissed a moment before while he stares out into the garden through streak-free glass patio doors, and he chews on his lip before deciding to speak. “Well, when Ivy was born I stopped being a kid, I suppose. My parents didn’t have a lot of interest in caring for either of us, and I was lucky, because my great aunt in Albuquerque did all of that for them when I was little, but when we moved here the support system really fell away. Nobody had considered that. We have my mom’s parents, but they’re about as warm as she is, and even though we’d be dumped over to theirs at the weekends, it wasn’t like we had especially fun or memorable times. Usually we’d get some bucket of crap toys from the seventies and whatever was on the three TV channels that they had. They were okay, but Ivy was a really nervous toddler. She didn’t like being around unfamiliar people, to the point that our grandmother would have to roll her bottles down the hallway to where she was hiding at the bottom of the stairs so that she’d drink anything at all. She just screamed whenever either of our grandparents came near her. It just wasn’t working out, so we eventually stopped having to go, and by then, when I was like eleven, it just made sense that I’d look after her instead.”

“What did that involve?”

“Everything. Feeding her, dressing her, putting her to bed, shopping for food, toys, eventually bringing her to the creche. She used to go to the childminders while I was at school, but only until I finished at three or four o’clock, and then I’d swing by and get her. A child collecting another child, like, I don’t know if they’d let that kind of thing happen anymore, but it was a small family run childminders, the kind of lawless place where they have this one old granny looking after about twelve children in her house and everything and anything goes. My mom used to come home and cook dinner for a while, but she was delighted when I got old enough to do that for her too. It meant she could stay out of the house for longer and do whatever she used to do. Have affairs or whatever.” He huffs out a laugh. “I mean, I really don’t know if that was ever the case but I wouldn’t be that surprised. Everything got really confined because of Ivy, you know? I always had to be home, and helping, and collecting and living my life on this schedule while all the other teenagers were just being blissfully selfish and… just teenagers.”

“But you had time to yourself, surely?”

“Yeah, at night when my parents were finally home from work, but I mean, yeah, it wasn’t about not having time to do hobbies or hang out with my friends, it was about having to do it at all. It was about having to consider those things. Nobody should have to parent their siblings, it was really stifling and really unfair. If my parents wanted another child then they should have been prepared to take care of her. You can’t just offload that responsibility onto the older child. I resented it, and I still do.”

I spear my fingers into the side of his hair and run my hand down the back of his head. “That’s why you went to Berlin.”

“I just didn’t want to do it anymore.”

“You shouldn’t have ever had to.”

“Right.” He hesitates and his teeth rake over his lower lip, pulling the skin until it’s taut and white. “I just feel like going to Berlin was the most selfish thing I could have possibly done though.”

“No way.” I say. “It forced your parents to do what they should have been doing all along, and look after your sister.”

“Yeah but it didn’t really do that. I look at Ivy now, and she’s doing a lot of those things I used to do for her all on her own. My parents never stepped up like I hoped they would, so she’s just becoming another teenager with too many responsibilities, and parents that will divorce as soon as they can and leave her without a solid base to come home to when she’s in college. And then, you know, on the other hand I think about Jen, and how bad everything has become for her and I know that if I’d stayed, and if I’d been here for her then maybe I could have-”

“It’s no use thinking that, Jude. You had to be on your own for once. You can’t hold up the whole world on your shoulders.”

“I’m selfish.” His voice is acidic, and the moment I feel his fingers loosen on me I grab a hold of his sleeve, because all of a sudden it feels vitally important to keep a connection between us.

“You didn’t get a proper childhood. I’d be even more selfish if I were you. You need to be doing the things that you want to do, seeing the world, partying with your friends, all of that stuff that you’ve been doing for the last four years. It’s all food for your soul.”

“You’re too forgiving of me. It’s okay to say that I’ve been generally inconsiderate.”

“You’re way too hard on yourself.” I say quietly. “And you know that’s not true. You’re a good person, and you were always so nice to me, even when I was quiet and shy. You made an effort to talk to me at that time that Jen invited me to that modern art exhibition in Dublin, and you made me feel so included and asked so many questions about me even though I felt so nervous around you both.”

“I feel like that’s the least anyone could have done.” He says sulkily, as though he doesn’t really feel like being talked out of his mood. “The more I dwell on it the more I think there is something seriously wrong with me. Something that should have been figured out a lot earlier, but like, here I am, a twenty two year old, in the final months of my final year at college and I feel a bit… I dunno, lost, or something. I’m floundering, and I don’t really know who I am anymore. I swore I had it figured out at eighteen but now that seems laughable to me.”

“Nobody tells you how weird it is to be in your twenties.” I declare. “They insist that it’s amazing and fun and you’ll have all of this independence, but actually it feels strange and vulnerable, and there’s no rule book about how to navigate your way through it. One day you’re a stupid teenager and the next you live on your own and you have to know how to use the city bus and remember the pin of a debit card.”

“Yeah.”

“It’s alright that you find it hard, is all I’m saying, and I for one, feel like I truly knew nothing about being an adult. To be honest sometimes I get a bit freaked out by how lost I feel. But then I try not to think about it, and I just go on with my day.”

“That’s your advice?” He says, with the hint of a smile threatening to crack through the gloom. “Just don’t think about it?”

“Probably shouldn’t be, should it?”

“I think that’s terrible advice, Evie.”

“Well that’s all I have for you.”

He leans into me and lightly kisses my jaw before going back to his food, and the featherlight touch of his lips sends shivers right down to my toes. “Well I think we should think about hard things.” He says. “I think that ignoring them only gives them more power, actually.”

“Maybe some things aren’t meant to be processed now. They’re meant for later.”

“How much later?”

“I don’t know. Just later.” I push the last of my dinner onto my fork and into my mouth and try not to feel self-conscious about the fact that he’s watching me like I’m under a spotlight.

“I just want you to know that if you ever wanted to talk to me about any of the things that happened you in first year then-”

My chair makes a hideous scraping noise against the parquet floor. “Do you have any pictures of you when you were small?” I say, wiping my hands on the thighs of my jeans, and he blinks. “Um. Why?”

“Just when we were talking about your childhood, like,” I stack his empty plate on top of mine. “I was wondering to myself what you might have looked like as a little boy. That’s all.”

“There are some, somewhere yeah. I can root them out if you want.”

“I’d love that, would you mind?” I hastily pack things away in the dishwasher, and I put the plates in crookedly, and I can’t find where the cutlery goes, and Jude is there, and he takes the forks out of my hands and gingerly places them into the sink.

“It’s fine. Leave it.” He says. “Come into the living room, I’ll get the baby photos out.”

Beginning // Prev // Next

#lucky girl part 3

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courtofmatchups · 25 days

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Hi hi, this is @shxtodxroki here, I saw your ask about a match-up exchange and I'd love to exchange obey me match-ups with you so here's my info :> (I’m only on anon because that blog isn’t my main blog) Also no rush to complete mine or anything, feel free to take your time! I should be able to get yours posted within a week of sending this (so by next Sunday night)!

My name is Bee, I go by she/her pronouns and I identify as bisexual! I’m an INFJ, a Taurus and a Ravenclaw if any of those are important!

As for my appearance, I have dyed bright pink hair that goes a little past my shoulders, its naturally wavy but sometimes its straight depending on how it dries. I’m 5’7” and I have green eyes, I’m pretty pale and I have freckles but you can see them much better in the sun. I think I’d say I’m more pear-shaped overall, and a slightly more sharp face/jaw. I tend to prefer more cute, pastel and/or feminine styles, but I also like to mix things up sometimes and try different styles like a more grungy all black look or just a cozy, relaxed one lol. When I’m at home, though, I’m usually quick to change out of the nicer outfits and just relax in some sweatpants/shorts and an oversized t-shirt :> I intend to get tattoos somewhere in the near future hopefully, as well as a tongue piercing someday!

For my personality, I’m definitely an introvert. I love spending time with the people I care about, but I also need at least a little bit of alone time each day just to decompress and relax. I have pretty bad anxiety, so I tend to overthink and I’m frequently stressed even if I don’t show it, and even about small things that most people don’t even think about lol. I’m also super awkward and shy especially when I first meet people especially since I sometimes struggle to read social situations, I’m really not the type to initiate conversations much at first and I even struggle with initiating physical affection with someone I’m close to. I like making lame jokes when I’m comfortable with people, and once I feel safe and close with someone I tend to ramble quite a lot about my interests or just topics I’ve dived into recently. I love making it a conversation and going back and forth whether the topic is super important or super dumb just because it’s fun for me to get to share my perspective and hear others’ perspectives too, and I tend to think I’m a pretty good listener as well! :) I try my best to generally be a friendly, kind person and look out for others even when it makes me nervous to confront things, and I tend to avoid conflict unless someone I love is being hurt. My worst trait is probably my procrastination so that’s something I’d love to get better at, in all honesty. I’m currently in college and studying to hopefully become an English/Language Arts professor one day, though I’ve been considering switching to sociology and being a sociology professor instead! I really really do love learning about things I find interesting/important and getting to share what I learn with people :] I love starting big, exciting creative projects in all kinds of forms, though I only end up finishing them about 50% of the time lol, and I usually enjoy staying up somewhat late as I just like being up and being able to use my time how I like, without my time being dictated as much as it usually is when I’m awake

Some qualities I tend to like in a partner is confidence/willingness to initiate since it’s something I struggle with, someone who’s patient and willing to listen when I’m having a hard time (and I’m more than happy to do the same in return) and someone honest and loyal. Since I’m very anxious, I’d prefer someone who’s open with their affection with me! They don’t have to make it super obvious in public or anything, just someone who’s open and not ashamed of their partner :) And someone who’s willing to kill/get rid of bugs! I HATE bugs, especially spiders and any kind of worm :< I don’t think I’d do well with someone who struggles with showing affection at all, I feel like two anxious attachment styles may be difficult to work with in a relationship and if someone is more avoidant or doesn’t like to show much affection in any way, I’d most likely get overwhelmed and insecure and it probably wouldn’t work out well :/ My giving love languages are mostly physical touch and gifts (I love getting to see people’s reactions when I get them gifts I know they’ll love, and even if I don’t have a ton of money I’m willing to spend a lot of it just to make my loved ones happy), and my receiving love languages are probably physical touch, words of affirmation and acts of service.

Some date activities I think I’d enjoy would be like a picnic or a trip to a theme park or fair, as well as pretty much any cozy inside date :) I like the thought of watching a movie at home too, but not really at a movie theater as it’s hard to really spend much time with your date or interact with them that way and I like being able to discuss movies with my partner as we watch them (after pausing to make sure we don’t miss anything of course lol)

As for my interests and hobbies, I’m a big fan of horror or mystery movies/media in general. (My favorite movie, for example, is Knives Out) I really enjoy reading as well, even though it’s much harder for me to find time to read and motivation to pick up a book lately lol, and I really enjoy writing as well! I enjoy anime/manga (my favorite anime is Yuri on Ice, if you’ve heard of it) and even though video games aren’t generally my favorite, there are a few kinds I really enjoy like visual novels (especially spooky ones), games like Danganronpa or FNAF or “cozy games” like Minecraft or Stardew Valley! I also play the cello (though I haven’t practiced as much in this past year) and I work backstage as the stage manager in most of my school’s theater productions. I really enjoy all kinds of music, I listen to anything from k-pop to musicals to “emo” music to just regular pop lol. I do bullet journaling as well, and I really enjoy collecting things even when I lose interest! (As in, even after I stop fixating on an interest so much and switch over to a new one, I never get rid of the merch because it still brings me joy and reminds me of how important that thing was to me :> ) I like anything that makes me emotional, whether it’s soul-crushingly sad or inspiring and heartwarming, I just like when media can make me feel things, and I’m a big crier since I tend to get emotional pretty easily :]

Sorry this is so long, I tend to ramble on and have trouble condensing things lol but I hope this is enough, and thank you so much again for agreeing to this exchange! I’m excited to see what you think :)

@shxtodxroki this is for you

It seems to me you've captured the heart of...

Leviathan!

Damn, you sound like the kind of person Levi would REALLY get along with. I see the two of you talking 24/7 and it'd be a dream come true for him. And you of course. You and he could totally relate on a lot of things, and I don't see you getting bored of each other. And you're really cute, too.

Some things that stood out to me: The fact that you are a huge fan of horror and mystery movies. Levi likes to dip his toes into every genre. If the movie/manga/anime/book is well written, he'd eat up whatever you'd recommend. Speaking of manga and anime, I think you and he'd like to share each others' thoughts on each other favorite anime without judgement and he definitely wouldn't feel ashamed around you. You seem like a pretty chill and relaxed person, which I think he would appreciate as he does have a tendency to overthink sometimes.

Also, as you're such a good listener, be prepared for LOTS of infodumping. His love languages include telling you all about the things he likes.

There are gonna be some rough patches like your anxious attachment style. Levi would be more than happy to help you tame your own demons, but you really gotta communicate what's on your mind if you feel insecure for whatever reason. Tends to overthink, so you might need to help him sort out his thoughts. With enough work, you can overcome whatever hurdle you face.

Expect lots of room dates with Levi. And if there's gonna be a comic con or something of the sort, he's definitely taking you. Whenever the two of you have a movie date, one thing he really looks forward to would be you snuggling up to him as the movie goes on.

#court of matchups #otome #obey me matchups #obey me shall we date #matchups #obey me #obey me x reader

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ayoharuko · 8 months

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♡ Writhing is art, Wanna try? ♡

Hello and Welcome to my Page! My names Ayo Haruko, you can also call me Emiko or just Ayo :3

I'm 21 and my Pronouns are She/Her!

The most important thing that you need to know about me is that I have ADHD, in other words. Inattentive ADHD or ADD, in simple terns I have attention span, distractibility, forgetfulness, and procrastination problems.

So if I open my requests please take note that your requests will take at least 5 days or less to finish, I apologize for that.

I mostly write Fluff and Angst, but when I'm in the mood I'll write some lime or full on Smut.

Platonic and Romance is an okay too!

Still deciding on your names Cuties ~

♡ Rules ♡

Please follow these rules before sending in a request or ask.

I will not take in requests that involve incest or abuse, or any dar themed stuff.

Please try to at least be polite and nice whenever you might send in a question or a request.

Please respect when I say that I'll be closing my requests. Sometimes people just don’t listen and still send requests. You will know if requests are closed if I post a note.

I do NOT write for incest nor support it so anything regarding that will be ignored.

Please do NOT copy and paste my work, or post them in another website. If you see someone do so, or see my work somewhere else please tell me.

Tumblr is the only place I post my works so if you see my works being posted by another person, just know that, that person isn’t me.

I can delete any requests that I don’t feel comfortable writing so please respect that.

When I say that REQUESTS ARE CLOSED, it means that all requests for the fandoms I'm writing for are closed.

Let's all try to be respectful to each other alright? :)

♡ Fandoms I currently write for ♡

Genshin Impact (All the guys and girls, the kids I will only write them platonically)

Yu Yu Hakusho (Team Urameshi including Koema, all the guys expect the Toguro Brothers, all the girls expect Atsuko)

Luxiem

Iluna Boys

Xoleil Boys

Shxtou

Haikyuu

My Hero Academia

Love and Deepspace

~ More will be added ~

♡ Strictly tropes I don't write ♡

Incest

Abuse

♡ MasterLists ♡

Genshin Impact

Danganronpa

Haikyuu

My Hero Academia

Luxiem

Yu Yu Hakusho

Love and Deepspace

~ More will be added ~

♡ !More About Me! ♡

I have a Cat named Fuwa!

I'm Taken by my S/o, yes I'm not a single Traveler >:3

I'm a Wanderer, Xiao & Lyney Main! (I decided to take these 3 because I don't wanna choose)

I have a slight obsession with Otome Games (I can confirm its different when you have a S/o already while playing them)

I play Twisted Wonderland and Honikai Star Rail! But I don't have the confidence to write about them yet (If this gets removed it means I already did heh)

My first Anime Crushes were Yoko Kurama from YYH and Tomoe from Kamisama Kiss (Till now I have a thing for long hair or just white hair in general..)

I'm a HUGE Extrovert, your girl loves talking :D

I have a Twin Brother, his just as annoying as me :3

I'm a huge hopeless romantic ♡

I'm Filipino, yea :D

Thank you for reading this far! I hope you guys will stay with me on my writhing journey :3

Make sure to also check this pinned post from time to time, because sometimes I might add a few more things.

But don't worry, I'll post a note if I've added something new :)

#Post by: Ayo Haruko/Emiko #Genshin Impact #Yu Yu Hakusho #Luxiem #Iluna Boys #Xoleil Boys #Shxtou #My Hero Academia #Haikyuu #Danganronpa

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daydreamerfox · 1 year

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Hi! I have a few things I wanna say! It's all under the cut so it won't occupy too much space, also, please enjoy this cute fanart of Layla, my child who I relate to way more than I wish I did

Maybe you’ve noticed that I've been kinda quiet the past few weeks… or months… Well, there’s a reason for that. At first I wasn't motivated at all to keep working with art, I mean, let's be real here, it's not really the easiest thing to work with... and we all know that. That fact plus not having my own computer to work whenever I want can lead to a lot of frustration. Feeling like drawing, but not being able to because of many reasons outside of my control can make my motivation vanish really quickly. I’m sure a lot of you can vouch for me on that, artist or not.

The thing is: I have been trying to keep going besides that, because "it's just a phase, things will get better, I just need to push past it" to a point where it was just bad for me in general and completely unhealthy.

I was avoiding drawing as much as I could and, when I did draw, I wasn't as productive as I wanted to be, because I kept getting distracted with everything else, procrastinating it as much as I could without realizing it, which would just lead to more and more frustration with myself.

I felt like I was falling behind, I wasn’t being able to post as frequently as I wanted to, so I thought maybe finishing Illustrations quickly was the way to go, but that would lead to me wanting to draw whatever and even then not being happy with the results. When I was happy with it it just didn’t get the attention I was expecting it to get, which just made me frustrated again and made me try to push myself even more, even though I didn’t have the tools I needed to finish any art piece on the time I decided to do it or I’d just pull all nighters just to get something done.

Whenever I thought of strategies of how to fix my problem I just felt lost. I knew where I wanted to get, what I wanted for myself, but I didn’t know what I should do to get there, I couldn’t get to a conclusion about it no matter what I tried. It just felt like I was doing a lot of work, but with no direction and it just made me be stuck at the same place, which would just tire and stress me instead of giving me any gratification

It got to a point where I genuinely thought about giving up working with art for good. If it was so bad for me, why would I keep trying, right? Maybe I should just try to find something I could work with instead, something that wouldn’t stress me so much, but I have to admit that just thinking about that possibility made me so anxious! Imagine myself not creating something as a career, not working on getting my comic done, not making my ocs be known, not creating art for games, it all just filled me with anxiety.

I wasn’t sure what to do anymore. Continue working in the way I was working was just tiring me, stressing me and just being terrible for me in so many different ways, but at the same time I know I need to do it for my mental health. I need to vent out, I need to express myself and the easiest way for me is through my art!

All I could think of the entire time was that I wanted my mom to still be here and help me find out what I should do!

It was a terrible weekend where I was thinking about it nonstop and wondering what to do and what path I should take. I was trying to organize my bedroom to at least try to keep my head occupied with something else for a moment, and then I found an old notebook where my mom wrote something for me and along with many things she wrote:

“Never give up on your dreams. Know that sometimes they don’t come true in the time we want because there’s always the right time for it to happen”

It might not seem much for you but this sentense alone kind of made everything click for me. It was just the one thing I needed, the advice from my mother I was looking for.

I think it’s important to say that I didn’t feel better right away, but at least I knew I couldn’t give up like I was thinking about doing. When my friends asked me what would be my decision, I still wasn’t sure, but I knew I couldn’t and I wouldn’t give up, so I wanted to try at least one last time…

Honestly I wanted to start working on it right away but I caught a cold right after I had that decision. I guess that was something else I needed: Time for me to plan out what I would do, rest, allow my body and brain to breath for a moment and not feel bad about it, just respect myself and not worry about being late for something I wasn’t late for. I shouldn't strain my body and I'm trying to understand that still. It’s not easy.

While I didn’t feel well enough to work I took a few classes on how to do what I’m planning to work on and, while that didn’t answer all my questions, at least that helped me a lot on knowing what path I should take to get to my goal. I know it won’t be easy, I know it won’t be quick, but knowing what I need to do to get there is enough for me not to be as anxious about running in circles trying to get somewhere. Even if sometimes I still get scared thinking about that possibility.

Ever since then I’ve been trying to organize myself, I’m documenting it, making a few vlogs (It’s in portuguese, but I can subtitle it for the people who can’t speak portuguese, if you guys want it). I’m planning on talking about what’s working for me and what isn’t, what are my thoughts about this process and what I wanna keep doing or not. Maybe some of it might help someone who’s struggling like I was, and if it does, then I’ll already be happy.

Making videos like that is something new for me, so it might take a bit long for now, but I want to make something nice for everyone. I’ll also write down my thoughts about it, post it here and on my other social media (I’ll try to make something kinda regular, but I’m still thinking about how often I’ll do it.) I know not everyone enjoy watching videos and sometimes can focus better on reading things and either way that’s a way for myself to organize my thoughts. I’ll write it down anyway, the difference is that I’ll post it and hopefully help someone.

I might add a few WIPs here and there, but it’ll mostly be focused on my organization and my journey to become the artist I wanna be.

I’ve also found a notion template that is actually working for me and I’m able to organize all the posts for different platforms I was so desperately trying to make (it's easier to keep track of everything if they’re in just one plae and it’s easier to reschedule things if they’re digital)

It’ll be a long way, I know that, but I’m glad I haven’t given up yet and you guys are more than welcome to join me, if you want to! I'll love to share this with you and know what's working and what isn't working for you guys! We can always share tips and tricks with each other!

I hope to be able to show up here more often and that you guys can have fun and maybe feel motivated to follow your dreams or try to reach your goals too. Maybe I’m dreaming a bit too high, but I just need to be patient and keep working for it, trying to make things work and most importantly, not giving up!

On a higher note: my sister helped me fix a laptop so I can work on it most of the time and a friend of mine is helping me build an actually good computer for myself, though I don’t know how long the latter will take, it’s already good news… at least in my opinion.

Here's my youtube channel for those who want to check on the vlogs (though I'll still let you guys know when a new video's out)

And if you prefer any other social medias:

Insta: https://www.instagram.com/daydreamerfox.art/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/daydreamerfox Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/daydreamer_fox

#Genshin impact #Layla #Fanart #brazilian artists #brart #Sumeru #daydreamerfox #🦊 The Artist Rambles #(I should probably make one of those pretty and aesthetically pleasing deviders just so I'll be happy looking at written posts on my blog)#art.txt

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blazedrawsstuff · 11 months

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Hemo Marrow, son of Monster Blood!

Hemo Marrow Son of Monster Blood

Parent

Monster Blood

Age

Killer Style

Don’t have one. I usually don’t care about how I look. As long as it’s passably clean and I feel good in it, that’s all that matters.

Freaky Flaw

I’ve been told that I’m kinda lazy. It’s not my fault most important things are so boring.

Pet

Rex. Now lemme tell you, he is a BIG dog. Like you know those books about the big red dog? That’s how big we’re talking. His doghouse is as big as our own house!

Favorite Activity

If you don’t count my love of eating, I love to collect toys, especially ones from the 90’s. Game Boy? Check. Tamagotchis? Check. Etch-a-Sketch? Check!

Pet Peeve

Airline food. For some reason it just doesn’t agree with me.

Favorite Subject

Skullinary Arts. You get to learn how to make food and you get to eat it when you’re done. I say that’s a win-win! Also Study Howl, it’s a good opportunity to chill out after a long class.

Least Favorite Subject

Maths. Like I know it’s important, but I’m already halfway asleep by the time we finish one problem. Such a snorefest…

Favorite Color

Green

Favorite Food

How can I choose? I’ll eat (almost) anything!

Friends

Ichorus Marrow (OC, Cousin) Maxillae "Max" Carpal (OC) Gulliver Earlmand (OC) Deuce Gorgon

Abilities

Large Appetite Like his parent, Hemo can eat much more than other monsters. He can even eat stuff that is normally inedible without negative consequences.

Skillset

Competitive Eating

hanks in large part to his large appetite, Hemo easily surpasses most monsters in terms of eating quantity. Making him an easy winner in eating competitions. Collecting Hemo has been known to collect a wide array of toys, his favorites of which coming from the nineties.

Personality

Hemo’s personality is as simple as his fashion choices, in that he is chill, laid-back, carefree, and mostly just goes with the flow. Chill as he is, he’s also passionate, especially in the worlds of eating and collecting old toys. However, he is the lazy sort, often only giving minimal effort for things he cares little for (ex: schoolwork) and tends to procrastinate on important tasks, often leaving them until the last minute. When it comes to eating, he can be rather greedy, usually trying to take as much food as he can before the others can even get a finger on it.

Trivia/Additional Information

Both his first and last name are references to blood. As “Hemo” is a prefix meaning anything relating to the blood and “Marrow” references bone marrow, where blood is made. Hemo’s headcanon voice actor is Scott McCord, who voices Owen in the Total Drama franchise. His dislike for airline food is a reference to the Goosebumps TV episode “More Monster Blood”, where airline food was how the protagonists were able to defeat the Monster Blood by making it sick. His dog, Rex, is based on Evan’s (the protagonist of the Monster Blood series) dog Trigger. Like Trigger, Rex is also named after a horse that starred in films. It is also a play on Tyrannosaurus Rex, as Rex is about as big as one. His birthday is September 12th. The month coming from the month the first Monster Blood book was published. The day comes from the book Monster Blood for Breakfast, where in that book the Monster Blood was a “12 Hour Trial Strength” version. This makes him a Virgo. His interest in collecting toys references the fact that in the first Monster Blood book, the Monster Blood was found in an old toy store.

#monster high #monster high oc #hemo marrow

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sanversandfriends · 1 year

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Today we're delighted to hear from @rdshirt, a longtime Sanvers fan and 2022 Big Bang artist. She'll talk about the importance of finishing things, and why, as she puts it in the intro to her A03 piece, we should all "sign up for the scary stuff."

Thanks, Redshirt!

Tell us a little about yourself. How long have you been creating fan art? What were some of your first subjects and what ships/characters in the SG universe have you illustrated?

I never did any fan art until I signed up for the Sanvers Big Bang. That was the first time I had ever made humans that managed to actually resemble the humans they were supposed to be. (Know that meme where the horse starts out great on one end and looks like a toddler drew the other end? Well…all the drawings in the figure art class I took all remained headless for a reason.) It was exciting to learn the new skills and have it finally click for me.

What are your favorite mediums to work with?

Since I was young I’ve been an oil painter. Though I did have a long hiatus from that, because I promised someone a painting and when I didn’t deliver I felt too guilty to paint anything else. Good news, I’m back painting again. (Y’all I had to finish that painting before the person died and I felt guilty for the rest of my life.)

For the fan art, I’m using Procreate to make digital artwork. I like it for this, because I can play around and change things easily.

What kinds of scenes do you enjoy illustrating? Do you have any favorite tropes or themes? Imagery that you like to work with?

I enjoyed the ranch scenery of my Big Bang. I’m comfortable with landscape and it allowed me to ease in to (*cough* procrastinate *cough*) the portrait part that I was nervous about. I’m excited about the imagery in my Finish-the-Fic match. It is very visual and there are a lot of things for me to play with.

Any advice for aspiring fan artists?

Do it. Do it because you want to and it makes you happy. Even if you’re scared. Even if you don’t think you’re “good enough”. You’re always going to see all the flaws in your own work. But I guarantee 99% of other folks seeing it are just going to be excited because there is fan art of the thing they also love. (And don’t worry about that other 1%, what they think doesn’t matter.)

Do you have a gallery of online work you’d like to post a link to?

I don’t have a gallery, but the Big Bang I did the art for is The Long Way by jkbtseriously (JessAnn), maybe go give that a read if you haven’t https://archiveofourown.org/works/43060836/chapters/108205251

#Sanvers #Supergirl #Finish the Fic #Fan Art #Getting Started #Sign up for the Scary Stuff

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cities · 1 year

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THINGS I HAVE LEARNED IN MY LIFE SO FAR

The list that follows was originally inspired by Stefan Sagmeister’s list by the same name. I’m also inspired by lists by the likes of Andrea Zittel, Jenny Holzer and Milton Glaser.

Since its first iteration in 2008, my list has been heavily edited. It's served as a guidepost to assess where my head's at with work/life through the years.

The irony of this list: life is messy. I think it'd be better titled THINGS I THINK I KNOW SO FAR, LET'S TALK IT OUT. I'm working on not being so black and white. If there's one thing I know for sure: we must discard our certainties when they're no longer useful. See #33.

Honing a self-concept is essential to create. Rarely do the self-concept and the real self align.

Art is an act of expression. Design is an act of service.

Everything deserves a closer look.

Trust, but verify.

Helping others helps me.

Dishonesty is at war with freedom.

The key to a good ending is knowing when to roll the credits.

In business, an inner world is only as interesting as it is marketable.

Originality is a necessary delusion.

You can’t work for a person you don’t respect.

Consistency outweighs speed.

Iteration over perfection.

There’s enough time for what is actually important.

The process of creation often yields a more interesting result than the finished product. At the same time, there is a cleansing in shipping the work.

Inquire within.

Forgive. Forgive yourself.

It is okay to not be okay.

Writing daily breeds honesty, and in its own time, action.

Certainty is at odds with curiosity.

Everywhere I go, there I am.

Maps, like rules, are still subjective.

Reality is neutral.

A good idea is never done. The same goes for places, people, events. Everything can be recontextualized.

Perfectionism is golden if you want to live safe and die predictably, like everyone else.

Minimalism can be an act of devotion or an easy answer. Sometimes it’s both.

Envy and procrastination reveal what you value and what you don’t.

Money can buy freedom, but freedom’s nothing much without a plan.

Love is an action.

Turn soft and lovely in a lesser town whenever you have the chance.

Love who you love, out loud and openly. You only get this once.

Maintain a curiosity the size of Carl Sagan’s comb-over.

Carry your camera wherever you go.

Discard this list and start again.

#nl #cities #rules #manifesto #holzerisms

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cheer-soli-art · 1 year

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It was a good year for art

Commentary for each artwork under the cut :D

February - biblically accurate bam - This was back when the jokes of ‘biblically accurate (insert noun here)’ had really hit mainstream, or maybe I just finally got inspiration to do something about this topic. Since Bam is the night, I added the usual night symbols of moons and stars. The waves at the bottom represent how the tides change with the cycle of the moon, and it ties in well with the idea of Bam being a ‘new wave’ in the Tower.

March - double city - An artwork that I haven’t released anywhere on the internet until today, as it was part of a school exhibition. The idea behind it was taking the place I grew up in and the city I lived in at the time and merging them into one location, representing how I am influenced by both cultures.

April - Marpril Colors Series - 17 Azure - This was a series of sketches I did over March and April, as a countdown for my return from Tower’s Tale (TT) hiatus. During these months, I was busy with school stuff and working on TT, so I didn’t have much time or desire to make other artworks.

May - Part 1_Page 201 - I started working on this TT page in December of the previous year, as the scene this page is a part of was important for me (oh, and the plot too). I was still practicing a new style, and though I don’t like it as much now, I still think it was worth the experimentation.

June - yanfei.jpg - This one was part of a Six Fanart Challenge that I never finished. Whoops. Anyways, I drew her because she’s the character that I’ve played with the most. I’m really proud of how I was able to capture most of the details, especially that staff, haha.

July - KBWday5.PNG - Ah, yes. The KhunBam month, where I spend 3 weeks thinking about what to post only for me to procrastinate on it until KhunBam Week arrives. I like this artwork because it’s where I finally started using references (lol), as well as understanding more organic backgrounds.

August - glitterandgold_01 - One of the two artworks I made for a WIP Big Bang. This is also the first artwork of the entire year that I finished on my laptop instead of my phone, as I had lost my stylus and only bought a new one around this time. I like that I was able to carry the dramatic mood from the sketch to the final version.

September - Part 1_Page 237 - There wasn’t a lot of artwork activity this month, apart from TT, so here is another page I’m really proud of. I wanted to communicate the overwhelming difference in power between the characters, so the pages before have a lot of open paneling and negative space that progressively build up to this one, which covers nearly the entire background in green. The frame around Goseng and Bam is actually the same proportions as the usual page border, but shrunken, to make it look like the fire was spreading beyond the edges of the page, to really emphasize the probable helplessness Bam is feeling in the situation… Sometimes, a lot of thought goes into these pages.

October - kitsune khun - This is a drawing I made for a raffle winner on Twitter. I included it here because this and the other artworks I made that week felt like they ‘clicked’. They were the ones that all the process from previous artworks were leading up to - finally I had an artwork that I was very satisfied with, where the process was fun and the final result was pretty to look at too. I’m a huge fan of using complementary colors, especially orange lighting and blue shadows..

November - Snow Study (gasp) - I don’t do studies as often as I should, so this one came as a surprise. I save a lot of images from Bing’s daily wallpaper, and since the cold weather was coming, I painted this chilly town with one as a reference. I also wanted to update my blog so it matched my current style, so this was drawn for that reason too.

December - ‘Polaroid’ mini series - “with hyung.png” - This is one of four artworks I made in a ‘polaroid photo’ style. I really like that aesthetic. There is something very nostalgic and deep about it - capturing a moment you deem important. Taking the context of polaroids and film into account, you don’t have the luxury to take various copies of a moment and pick the right one afterwards like we do nowadays, so ideally you’d want everything to be perfectly in place and extremely important before you press the shutter. And yet, in these ‘photos’, the moments captured are not of grandiose events or life-changing moments, but of casual, daily life. I wanted to appreciate the ordinary in this small series. Maybe I’ll revisit it next year.

Bonus round

There were a few artworks that didn’t make the cut, but I still wanted to talk about them. So here they are.

“A summoning ritual (that worked a little too well)” - This is where I started the habit of drawing genshin characters when I wanted them on my team. Though this one is a little rough around the edges, I still like the colors and texture of the artwork.

“met gala hwar” - I was watching a video talking about how the Gilded Gala was a disaster (unsurprisingly), and one of the looks that went by (as examples of what worked) caught my eye. So I drew Hwaryun in it.

“Part 1_Page 216.PNG” - I have a very consistent system for numbering pages - just thought you might wanna know. I didn’t count this one in the final cut because some of the panels here were from pages drawn last year, so I felt that I was cheating a bit. There is a lot of thought behind this particular panel, but I will discuss that one when I release the full cleaned-up version sometime in the next few months.

“a precious jewel” - This artwork means a lot to me. Though it was rather quick (done under an hour, curse my comic panel habits), a lot of ‘feeling’ went into it. I think that out of all of the artworks, this is the one where I’m pouring what I’m actually feeling at the moment - I can’t quite put it into words here (as it is a little awkward, and I’m afraid of things getting lost in translation too), but I’ll try. I think that for that hour, I understood where Khun was getting at with the jewel metaphor, but rather than wanting to hide someone away, it was more of wanting to keep those feelings close to my heart… that kind of thing.

“Bleak December_07” - My entry for Secret Santa this year. Just thought I’d include it. I signed up to an email address sending Edgar Allen Poe’s works, and was floored by The Raven, so the title and tone of this short comic reflect that too.

“fall for you, fall for me” - i like khunbam. and i like autumn, now. i like coloring khun’s hair, ‘cuz its color can look so different under different lightings. it’s a simple and easygoing artwork. i like simple and easygoing things sometimes too.

#art summary 2022 #art summary #artists on tumblr #my art #digital art #I’ve had to draft this three times thanks tumblr

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ladynahimana · 2 years

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I thought it time to give an update on my doujinshi progress for Teach me and sharing my thoughts on the topic of AI-generated art and how I came to drawing these doujinshi.

Progress is slow, because I'm not satisfied with the cover and I'm doubting ths appeal of this series in general. Its topic and atmosphere is not my strength and therefore I feel it's not enough. My mentor probably also felt this. She didn't like the script, but couldn't pinpoint what exactly was wrong with it. Maybe it's the kink. Neither of us know and since then I struggle. How to improve something you don't know where the exact problem lies? I still managed to finish the storyboard and my mentor now likes it and encourages me to finish it completely. After working on the cover and not being satisfied with it, I stopped working on it. Procrastination at its finest. Recently I at least finished the draft of the script for the next part, which will probably be the last of it, ending this series with three parts. Instead I want to go back in my comfort zone and that is heavy romance. My sister calls my works cheesy, but I like them the way they are and the most important thing for me is to feel proud of what I created.

So yeah, enough about my struggles with this new series. I started creating doujinshi as part of my manga lessons, which are part of the rewards I get on Patreon. When Covid-19 hit and cons all over the world got canceled, I decided to raise my pledge to one of my favorite artists to support her in these difficult times. The one-hour monthly lessons started out with how to draw in chibi style and after that, to continue the lessons, I decided to draw doujinshi with her guidance and feedback.

I love doujinshi and have collected four boxes full of only FMA ones. *cough* I rarely read a BL manga I end up enjoying, because I, as the reader, usually don't feel like the mangaka drew them with passion and more like because it's just a job they try to earn a living with. It's also why I'm not a fan of manga where writer and artist are different people. On top of that there’s this generic art style for the BL genre and the characters are really stereotypical and nowhere near as deep as the characters that can be used in fanworks (which is no wonder due to the short length of most BL manga).

And this leads me to AI-generated art. I'm just a hobby artist. I don't earn money with any of my art and therefore I personally don't have to fear for paying my bills. But I fear for the artists that do and the world of art in general. An AI will never be able to create something with a heart. It has no emotions. It does not think about happiness and the joy of creating something. It is soulless and their art will always lack something truly beautiful.

The sad thing is that so many people don't care. What they define as "beautiful" is different. They want to see “perfect” drawings. They don't see the beauty that is imperfection and criticize the work of artists, when they see it. Human faces are not symmetrical, not perfect and drawing them that way will always be more beautiful to me than an artist drawing one side of a face and then digitally mirroring that to create a perfectly symmetrical face.

Society doesn't see artists as essential, which Covid-19 already highlighted and now those artists are getting abused by stealing their art and training AI designed to replace them. When Clip Studio Paint announced the inclusion of Stable Diffusion into the program and advertising it with how easy and fast backgrounds can be created, I was like "oh no" and so relieved, when they canceled it after getting much negative feedback. Of course, drawing things like backgrounds is time-consuming and not the focus for readers of comics. In the age of webtoons it's all about being fast and productive, but at what cost? Ripping the artists off that fed the AI without consent to enable mass-production? To me an elaborate background created with 3D-models converted to lineart will always be inferior to a background that is self-made with wonky lines and a perspective that is a bit off. It's the heart, which created the artwork, that counts. It's not mass-produced and passionless. It's art that can even touch the soul. That being said, I would be really happy if my so far shared doujinshi were able to accomplish that for someone. Art is a passion I hope to never loose, even if there are times of struggle and uncertainty.

#royed #edward elric #roy mustang #fma: brotherhood #fma doujinshi #my art

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4reology · 1 year

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imperfections are a part of art

my friend @gabdigitalart sent me this video earlier today:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SMwAfHCzxtM

... and asked for a summary of key points like i don’t have the memory of a goldfish!

but honestly, it was a great video. so, as per my friend’s genius suggestion, here are my notes and thoughts:

on a 9hr drawing: “most of that time was spent staring at it, mustering up the courage to make the next stroke" (or something like that... im paraphrasing okay?!?) man’s summarized my whole art process in a single comment. if you look at my art style, you’d think that they’re very simple and should take no time at all... and you’d be right! i don’t even draw them from scratch, and the colors are super flat bcs lighting scare the shit out of me. yet, it takes me hours to finish one piece, and a month to start another. my art process has been revolving around my lack of courage: from omitting a lot of important elements to procrastinating on a piece for weeks, just so i won’t have to leave my comfort zone.

setting timers: i never liked the idea of this at first. it seemed counter-productive to me. but seeing how the artist in the video initially set himself a 2-hour timer, stopped to take his time on a few art pieces then went back to setting timers when he started to feel the burnout, i realized i got it all wrong. the timers weren’t there to improve your drawing speed at the expense of quality. they’re there to force us artists to focus less on details. sometimes, our perfectionism holds us back more than it pushes us.

#art journey

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galactic-pirates · 11 months

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So I might not have anything else ready to post for prompt month. I have some pieces in progress but it’s looking doubtful that I will finish them. After the “Ezekiel as Ezra” drawing I took a break from the art and shifted gears to revision analysis of this novel draft I wrote a couple of years ago.

Ten days later and I have tossed most of it, have a rewritten outline, and I’m ready to write the second draft.

Except I’m not.

For two days now I have procrastinated and avoided and just not started with the writing. This is something of a pattern with me. If I can do things (and often I can’t do anything) but when I can do things, I can do pre-tasks quite well. I can make lists, I can plan, I can be analytical and do prep work. The rewriting of the outline involved a lot of creative thought too, as once I knew what didn’t work I had to come up with something that I hoped would this time. So it’s not like I can’t totally do creative stuff.

I just can’t word.

It somehow makes it real I think which hits me in the subconscious where I am afraid all the time. I am afraid that it will suck again. I am afraid that I will never be able to fix it to my satisfaction. I am afraid that this will all just be wasted effort. I am also afraid that I will be able to write it ok, that I will make it ‘done’ at some point because I am afraid of what comes next and I’m not sure I’m ready for that. So yeah equally afraid of failure and success. Probably overwhelmed too for good measure with all the things I am trying to remember about how to write it better this time (technique wise, not just the content points).

I’m not just like this with words, I am like this with everything. Prep work is fine but the actual thing? My mind runs a million miles in the other direction. Like I want to get better at art but I have some fairly comfortable bad habits and it’s easier to just roll with that, rather than actually tackle the hard work and practice to really improve. I don’t have to face how crap I am without the crutches I lean on. Plus if I don’t ever seriously knuckle down and try, then I don’t have to find out whether it’s impossible for me to get to the skill level I would like.

My whole life is like this. The second anything gets real, or feels important, or has consequences, I start to run. I was good at school until the actual qualification years came about. Then I stopped doing my homework when it was set, and started scrambling to do it the night before. I stopped putting in extra effort and started doing the bare minimum. My classmates thought it was funny and strange as if they shifted it was the other way, to doing better now it mattered.

So I don’t entirely know what to do with myself. I am trying to be gentle and listen to my feelings rather than push and beat myself up, and send myself into a depression spiral (like normal). As that isn’t a behaviour pattern which serves me. It’s one I have practiced and reinforced for over two decades though so hard habit to break. Plus, intellectually knowing something and actually feeling it are two different things. I am annoyed with myself and I wish I could do better, I wish I could be the person I want and not self-sabotage like this. I hate it.

#sam rambles (a lot)#feeling the frustration today #being better is so much harder

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cathrynworrell · 1 year

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Embracing imperfection in our drawings

I’ve been struggling recently to pick up a pen or pencil and make a drawing in my sketchbook. Every day for the past couple of weeks I’ve made lists of ideas for things I want to draw or paint but the motivation comes just as I’m about to go to bed and when I wake up in the morning I spend the day avoiding my sketchbook again.

Perfectionism as procrastination

But then I realised my subscribers on Patreon and Substack were due a sketchbook prompt and a drawing demo video so I decided to just get on with it and pick up my sketchbook. I looked at the prompt I’d chosen and thought ‘I don’t want to draw that’. I found something to draw from observation that fit the prompt perfectly and thought ‘Nope, I don’t want to. I can’t.’

But I gave myself a talking to, sat down and did it anyway. I kept things simple - a basic, not-too-big sketchbook, no paints, a pencil before adding black ink on top. I found myself looking intently at the jar I was drawing, getting the basic shape down lightly in pencil and adding a fine black line over the top.

It all went reasonably well. And then, just as I was finishing the drawing, I realised I’d drawn the checked pattern on the lid wrong. It had started so well and although it was tricky to draw with just a black pen, I was managing pretty well but half way through I lost concentration and the pattern wasn’t quite right any more. I fudged it to do the best job I could and finished the drawing.

Be OK with the mistakes

Walking away from my desk I felt disappointed and thought that maybe I could in fact ditch the video I’d made and start afresh tomorrow. Choose another subject, pretend this one didn’t happen. In other words, procrastinate some more and only share the ‘perfect’ work. But no doubt that drawing wouldn’t be perfect either so where do we draw the line?

Why do we draw in the first place? I know for me, the reason I got back into drawing was all about the process of drawing, not so much the outcome. The feel of the pen against the paper, getting lost in the moment, and being comfortable enough to look at the final drawing without judgement before turning the page and carrying on.

So yes, maybe I will make another drawing tomorrow. But, if I want to share the reality of what it’s like to make art with my Patreon and Substack communities, then sharing the wobbly mistakes is important. It’s genuine.

No matter how long we’ve been drawing, we’ll keep making mistakes here and there and not everything is going to be perfect - maybe nothing will be and that’s OK too. The thing about drawing, especially in your sketchbook is that it’s a drawing. It’s come from your hand and your eye so it’s always going to have something about it that isn’t absolutely, exactly, like the real life object/scene you were drawing from. And to be honest, most people looking at the drawing won’t notice the bit that went wrong, or if they do they won’t care, so why should you?

Enjoy the process, turn the page and keep going

It’s one drawing, from one moment in your life and when you look back at it you’ll remember that moment, maybe even more so because of the imperfection. It you want it to be exact, then just take a photograph and move on but something tells me that you’ll open you sketchbook again soon and make another drawing and another and another.

If you want to feel more at ease about your imperfect drawings, join me over on Patreon where you’ll get to see me making all kinds of drawings - the good, the bad, the ‘what was I thinking’. Just keep drawing.

#drawing #imperfection #sketchbook #patreon #substack

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talabib · 1 year

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Unlocking Peak Performance: How to Level Up Your Productivity Game

Key Point:

Productivity is a learned skill. And with the right techniques and mindset, you can reach levels of elite productivity. By staying agile, mindful, and organized, even the most daunting to-do list can be swiftly dealt with.

In today's fast-paced world, productivity is paramount. Whether you're a busy professional or a dedicated student, mastering the art of efficient task management can significantly improve your performance and overall quality of life. This post delves into the secrets of leveling up your productivity game, offering valuable insights and actionable strategies to help you excel.

Become a Productivity Ninja

Transforming yourself into a productivity ninja involves honing your skills in time management, prioritization, and organization. By consistently practicing these disciplines, you can cultivate a mindset that promotes efficiency and ensures optimal utilization of your resources.

Value Your Attention as a Precious Currency

Your attention is a valuable asset that should be spent judiciously. Be mindful of how you allocate your focus, directing it towards high-impact tasks and activities that contribute to your personal and professional growth.

Master Inbox Zero

Inbox zero, the practice of maintaining an empty email inbox, is an achievable and sustainable goal. By implementing effective email management techniques, such as sorting, labeling, and archiving, you can streamline your digital communications and reduce stress.

Capture and Consolidate Outstanding Tasks

Ensure that all pending tasks are recorded and consolidated in a single, easily accessible location. This practice prevents tasks from slipping through the cracks and enables you to maintain a clear overview of your responsibilities.

Hack Your To-Do List for Enhanced Productivity

Optimize your to-do list by breaking down large projects into smaller, manageable tasks, and prioritizing them based on urgency and importance. This approach enables you to tackle your workload strategically, ensuring that you make consistent progress towards your goals.

The Importance of Reflective Thinking in Productivity

Thoughtful contemplation is as crucial as action when it comes to productivity. Regularly reflecting on your performance, habits, and strategies allows you to identify areas for improvement and implement changes that enhance your efficiency.

Tackle Tasks Head-On

Procrastination is the enemy of productivity. To overcome it, adopt a proactive mindset and tackle tasks promptly. This approach not only helps you make steady progress but also bolsters your motivation and sense of accomplishment.

Implement Smart Strategies for Productivity Gains

Maximize your productivity by employing intelligent techniques, such as time blocking, the Pomodoro Technique, or the two-minute rule. These strategies help you optimize your workflow, maintain focus, and boost your overall efficiency.

Leveling up your productivity game is a continuous journey of self-improvement and strategic planning. By implementing the tips outlined in this article, you can transform yourself into a productivity powerhouse, capable of conquering even the most daunting tasks with ease and finesse. Embrace these principles, and witness the remarkable impact they have on your performance and overall success.

Action Plan: Don’t give yourself more time than you need.

Ever heard of Parkinson’s Law? Work expands to fill the time allocated to it. Whether you have two weeks or two days to write a report, you’ll probably still be putting the finishing touches on it when you hit your deadline. So be ruthless with the amount of time you allocate for specific tasks. There’s no point allowing yourself five hours to do your expenses when, if you really knuckled down, you could get them done in one.

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