#drusus the younger

[wolframpant]

Domina and the children of the next Julio-Claudian generation

[cesareeborgia]

↳ family trees + Julio-Claudian dynasty (limited to the main figures)

requested by anonymous

[mywingsareonwheels]

A thing that should happen:-

Armando Iannucci should make a Thick of It/Death of Stalin-type tv series or film about the Emperor Claudius’s reign, and specifically about the increasingly powerful freedmen-led civil service under him. Almost certainly including the fall of Messalina, the marriage to Agrippina (eurrggh) and the adoption of Nero, and then Claudius’s death and Nero’s succession.

Lead roles: Pallas and Narcissus, obviously. And let’s face it the Palatine would have plenty of lovely corridors (even colonnades!) for them to have discussions/blazing arguments in.

Especially: look, Roger Allam and Anton Lesser are really too old to play Pallas and Narcissus (either way around) but WOULDN’T IT BE GREAT. You’d definitely want them both in it one way or another. And Capaldli if you could get him.

(Bonus points if they could cast someone actually disabled to play Claudius (and the fact that we don’t know precisely what his impairments/health problems were gives some flexibility there, but I’d be astonished if there isn’t e.g. a really superb and horribly underemployed actor with CP who’d be fricking amazing in the role).) (Triple bonus points if they can get Emma Southon to advise, and if they could persuade Natalie Haynes to play a guest role. ;-) )

[ancientcharm]

Claudius: The fool of the dynasty.

Claudius was born in Lugdunum, Gaul on August 1, 10 BC. On his mother's side, he was the grandson of the legendary Mark Antony and great-nephew of emperor Augustus. His father was the son of the Empress Livia and brother of emperor Tiberius. He also had blood ties with Julius Caesar.

According to historical sources: His sister, Livilla, after hearing an Augur say that her younger brother would be emperor, exclaimed: "May the gods save Rome from such misfortune. That would be the end of the empire." His grandmother, Livia, avoided talking to him because "when he was a child, the empress felt uncomfortable seeing and hearing him." During his childhood, the family avoided taking him to public events so as not to be seen. All this drama just because Claudius was lame, stuttered and had a tic.

During the reigns of Augustus and Tiberius, that is, for almost his entire life, he was prohibited from holding public office because of his "defects." From a very young age it was determined that he could never be heir to the throne. This was determined by his family but not by his destiny.

Three wives, three troubles.

Year 9: The Empress Livia convinced a senator who was a close friend of her family, to marry her daughter, Plautia Urgulanilla, to her 18-year-old grandson. They had a son, Claudius Drusus, who died at 14-15 years old when he threw a piece of pear into the air to catch it in his mouth and the piece got stuck in his throat. Years before the son's death, a girl was born. But months later, Claudius noticed that the baby looked more like one of his freedmen than him. Claudius publicly declared that the girl was not his daughter. This scandal occurred at the same time that her brother-in-law, Plautia's brother, murdered her wife by throwing her out of a window. After this, Claudius immediately divorced.

Year 28: The prefect of the Praetorian Guard, Sejanus, was plotting to occupy the throne. Knowing that no one would accept an emperor who was not related to the dynasty, he married his sister, Elia Paetina, to Claudius. They had a daughter named Antonia. In the year 31 the plots and murders of Sejanus were discovered; Emperor Tiberius sentenced him to death. Claudius was forced to divorce the relative of the traitor but he never abandoned his daughter Antonia.

Year 38: During the reign of his nephew Caligula, Claudius married a woman member of the dynasty. The young and beautiful Valeria Messalina was the granddaughter of Antonia the Elder, Claudius's aunt. Antonia the Elder was the first daughter that Mark Antony had with Augustus's sister. Ten years later, this third marriage will end in worse circumstances than the first two.

Interestingly, the “mad" emperor Caligula was the first to recognize that Claudius had the skills to hold an important position. Claudius at 46 years old had the well-deserved important office thanks to his nephew. He was appointed consul.

The less thought day

On January 24, 41, the emperor was assassinated by the Praetorian Guard in collusion with several senators. Minutes later, the emperor's wife and daughter were also murdered.

And what no one would have thought possible happened: At the age of 50 Claudius became Caesar. The fourth emperor of Rome.

According to the historians Flavius Josephus and Cassius Dion, Claudius, terrified, thinking that the senators' plan was to exterminate all the members of the imperial family to restore the republic, hid behind a curtain. A Praetorian soldier found him and immediately proclaimed him emperor because he was the only male in the dynasty who could rule, the other remaining member being his 3-year-old grandnephew Lucio Domitius, whom 9 years later Claudio himself would give the famous name Nero.

Claudius the Conquer

Claudius surprised Rome by proving to be not only an intelligent emperor but also a conqueror who would make the empire greater. In 43, Claudius begins the campaign to conquer Britannia. Circa 50 the Romans founded the city Londinium /London.

Although this was his most famous conquest and territorial expansion, it was not the only one. Noricum: Present-day central Austria (west of Vienna), part of Bavaria (Germany), northeastern Slovenia, and part of the Italian Alps. Thrace (Bulgaria), and he made the Danube River a new border of the Roman Empire.

Claudius the Emperor

He distinguished himself for his policy of Meritocracy. He rewarded for ability , not for personal sympathies. He allowed men from of non-aristocratic origin access to the Senate. Claudius gained the respect of the Senate, the army and the people at the same time, something that had not been seen in Rome since the time of Augustus.

He had two children with his third wife: Octavia, born late year 39, and Tiberius Claudius, later nicknamed Britanicus due the conquest of Britannia, born 19 days after Claudius' accession to the throne.

He wrote many works, most during the reign of Tiberius. In addition to a history of the reign of Augustus and some treatises on the game of dice, his great passion, among his main works are a History of Etruscan civilization in twenty books, a History of Carthage in eight volumes, and a dictionary of the Etruscan language.

Pliny the Elder refers to Claudius as "One of the best writers". Evidently, Claudius learned a lot from his teacher, the most prestigious Roman historian, Titus Livius (Livy), author of the extraordinary work Ab Urbe Condita.

In the year 47 Claudius celebrated the Ludi Saeculares of the eighth centenary of the founding of Rome.

The tragic end of the empress.

Empress Valeria Messalina becomes the lover of Senator Gaius Silius. Taking advantage of her lineage as a woman of the Julius Claudia dynasty, she convinced that man that together they could take the throne from Claudius. In 48, while Claudius was in Ostia, Messalina divorced him and married Silius. Three freedmen arrived in Ostia to give the incredible news to the emperor.

According to Tacitus: "Claudius, having returned to the palace, ordered that Messalina be brought to him, but the freedman Narcissus, fearing that the emperor would forgive her, ordered a freedman, a centurion, and some tribunes to proceed with the execution. The woman was overtaken in the gardens and executed; informed of his wife's death while he was at the table, Claudio would not have asked any more questions."

The senator and his group of accomplices and supporters were also executed.

Seven years earlier: Claudius ordered the return of his nieces, daughters of his deceased brother Germanicus:, Livilla and Agrippina the Younger, both exiled by Caligula in 39. Livilla was highly favored by Claudius, and Agrippina the Younger was ver loved by the people. This situation caused Messalina worry and jealousy.

Messalina, through intrigue, in a very short time managed to send Livilla back into exile, along with the philosopher Seneca -a close friend and ally of Agrippina the Younger- accusing them of being lovers and conspiring. Livilla died in exile shortly after arriving, which leads to suspicion that she was murdered.

But Mesalina could not make Agrippina the Younger disappear, who was extremely cunning and more dangerous than Livilla because she had a son, that is, a candidate for the throne who, to make matters worse, he had more blue blood than Britannicus. In all likelihood, this could be the reason Messalina attempted to overthrow Claudius.

The fourth wife, and the death.

If Senator Gaius Silius was able to use Messalina's lineage to try to overthrow Claudius by marrying her, what could another do who marries the widow Agrippina, a direct descendant of Divine Augustus? This was the reason for Claudio's incredible decision to marry his niece: simply so that no other man could marry her. Agrippina immediately accepted the proposal to become empress of Rome.

The marriage between an uncle and his niece was considered incest and a crime in Rome. However, this was not an incestuous relationship but a political union. Even so, dispensations had to be presented to the Senate and religious authorities, and there were endless ceremonies.

Finally, in the year 49, in an unprecedented event in Roman history, the Emperor married his own niece. Immediately she gets Claudius to bring her close friend Seneca from exile. Agrippina appoints Seneca as her son's tutor and teacher. Claudius granted Agrippina the title of Augusta. Curiously, he did not grant that title to empress Messalina when they both ascended the throne, but to his deceased mother Antonia the Younger.

In 50 Claudius adopted his great-nephew Lucius as son and changed his name to Nero Claudius. Agrippina's son become the heir to the throne, instead Emperor's own son. Many historians believe that this was because in the Dynasty, when choosing the successor it was more important to take into account who he was descended from in a direct line. Nero, unlike Britannicus, was a direct descendant of Augustus (great-great-grandson).

Later, Agrippina convinces Claudius to marry his daughter Octavia to Nero. At that time Nero and Octavia are around 14 and 12 years old respectively.

In October 13 of 54, at age 64, the emperor died suddenly during a banquet, after having eaten mushrooms, according to Juvenal's version.

There are several versions about his death, however they all agree on the theory that the emperor was poisoned. Personally, I want to believe that his death was due to natural causes.

Below, a text that is not mine but from a very important site with an extensive article on the death of Emperor Claudius. I copy and paste the final part that I was happy to read.

However, as Levick points out, those present at the banquet do not seem to have suspected poisoning of any sort; moreover, the eunuch Halotus, whose job was to taste the Emperor's food, kept his job when Nero assumed the throne—evidence that nobody wanted to put him out of the way, either as an accomplice or as a witness to assassination. We see no reason to believe that Claudius was murdered. All the features are consistent with sudden death from cerebrovascular disease, which was common in Roman times. Towards the end of 52 AD, at the age of 62, Claudius had a serious illness and spoke of approaching death. Around that time there were changes in his depiction in busts, cameos and coins—with thick neck, narrow shoulders and flat chest. The Apocolocyntosis, addressed to an audience some of whom were present at the death, makes clear that there is no need to postulate poisoning, accidental or otherwise.

Text : © 2002, The Royal Society of Medicine.

The Divine Claudius

Sculpture of Claudius deified (1st Century) Vatican Museums.

After his death, like Augustus, he was deified.

The boy who was said to never achieve anything not only became an one of the best writers of Rome, emperor and conqueror but also a god.

[uncleclaudius]

Cameo bearing an image of Claudia Livia, known as Livilla, niece and daughter-in-law of Emperor Tiberius. According to the ancient sources, she was, together with her lover Praetorian Prefect Sejanus, complicit in the murder of her husband Drusus the Younger. When Sejanus fell in 31 CE Livilla was condemned to death. Her mother Antonia allegedly starved her to death.

[duxfemina]

Who of the many women that surrounded Mark Antony could you see yourself being FRIENDS with? Not who you admire the most but who you'd enjoy drinks and dishing the dirt with the most

It's honestly kind of hilarious how the "Julio-Claudian" Dynasty is really a bunch of Antonians. Over half of the emperors and most of the influential women of the family are all Antonians

[liviasdrusillas]

Antonia, Livia's daughter-in-law, obviously enjoyed her company. After the death of Drusus, she chose to remain a univira and live close to Livia. Livia kept Julia the Younger going during her long exile (hypocritically, according to Tacitus), with financial and probably emotional support as well. Julia's daughter, Agrippina the Elder, was shielded from Sejanus by Livia.

Roman Women: The Women Who Influenced the History of Rome by paul chrystal

[just-late-roman-republic-things]

Just finished Servilia and Her Family by Susan Treggiari!

Overall, I really liked it. I disagreed with parts of her portrayal of Caesar, and there were two small factual errors, but otherwise the book seems very solid. Treggiari is very good at distinguishing fact from speculation and educated guesses. She also provides a valuable corrective to sexist assumptions and stereotypes that color our views of Roman women. I felt like I learned not just about Servilia, but about many women and their experiences of the world.

Treggiari's genius lies in prosopography. She is excellent at tracing complex family connections, ties of marriage and friendship, and obscure political alliances. Honestly, I lost track of all the links she described, because they were so extensive and detailed. (It wasn't lack of clarity, it was just a lot of info.) In fact, I'd even recommend this book if you want to learn more about Brutus, Cassius, Cato the Younger, Marcus Livius Drusus, or any of their associates.

I think Treggiari also strikes an excellent balance between painting a clear picture of Servilia's personality and activities based on what we know, and not leaning too much on speculation. Treggiari is good at presenting multiple plausible explanations and telling you what we don't know. But her Servilia still comes across as a resourceful, intelligent, brave woman who was devoted to her family while still maintaining a life of her own.

This Servilia is far more than just Caesar's mistress or Brutus' mother. She is a respected social leader and a skilled political operator. She loves, she worries, she has a sharp tongue when she's angry, she doesn't tolerate any disrespect, she survives multiple civil wars and threats to her life. She's one of the few people who can intimidate Cato the Younger.

Anyway, very good book. Along with Skinner's Clodia Metelli and Schultz's Fulvia, I'm pleased to have another biography of a Roman woman to recommend.

[blueiskewl]

Roman Marble Bust Early 1st century AD

Portrait of a youthful Julio-Claudian male probably Germanicus, the nephew and adopted son of Tiberius. This example is carved with the characteristic locks of hair combed over the forehead in this period. H. 36 x 18 cm.

Germanicus Julius Caesar (24 May 15 BC – 10 October AD 19) was an ancient Roman general and politician most famously known for his campaigns in Germania. The son of Nero Claudius Drusus and Antonia the Younger, Germanicus was born into an influential branch of the patrician gens Claudia. The agnomen Germanicus was added to his full name in 9 BC when it was posthumously awarded to his father in honor of his victories in Germania. In AD 4 he was adopted by his paternal uncle Tiberius, who succeeded Augustus as Roman emperor a decade later. As a result, Germanicus became an official member of the gens Julia, another prominent family, to which he was related on his mother's side. His connection to the Julii Caesares was further consolidated through a marriage between him and Agrippina the Elder, a granddaughter of Augustus. He was also the father of Caligula, the maternal grandfather of Nero, and the older brother of Claudius.

[wolframpant]

Domina characters and their busts

[markantonys]

Hii! I just wanted to ask if you saw the trailer for domina season 2?

and from another anon (lots of classics fans in my inbox today!)

Have you seen the new trailer for season 2 of Domina? Season 2 will start airing in July!!! I feel like I’ve been waiting forever. I’m so psyched especially to see more of Antonia Minor (how funny will it be to see Octavia and Livia share grandchildren after that finale) and Iullus and Julia and maybe even Tiberius and Vipsennia. Although I am a bit sad because there’s a lot of speculation that this season will depict Agrippa’s death and Drusus’s death but interested to see where it’s all going anyway. My only complaint is the lack of Cleopatra Selene and Juba.

ZOOMS OVER TO WATCH IT aaaaahh i didn't even know they were making a season 2!! it's been so long i thought for sure it had been cancelled! this is so exciting! i am ready to see my beloved himbo and poor little meow meow (a rare man who can do both) iullus antonius onscreen again!!!!! what do you mean he's not the main character, to me he is. you don't know true joy until you've gotten to see your Obscure Historical Fav be adapted onscreen for the first time in cinematic history :') (more or less, he WAS in one shitty made-for-tv movie i watched once)

on the one hand i hate how dirty they did octavia and how they went for the tired old trope of antagonistic female in-laws (it's great that you want to lift up livia who's historically always been villainized, but you don't have to turn around and villainize octavia to do it!), but on the other hand, i love mess and i will be chomping away on popcorn watching The Real Housewives Of Ancient Rome come july. and yes i can't wait to see more of antonia minor now that she'll be older! and iullus and julia!!!!!!! but agreed very sad that cleopatra selene wasn't included - i can see why there wasn't space for her story in a show focused around livia (and god there were SO many kids in augustus and octavia's households, some inevitably need to be cut), which is why we someday need that younger generation to be the FOCAL point of a show rather than just side characters in their parents' stories.

[palecleverdoll]

Wives and Daughters of Roman Emperors: Ages at First Marriage

I have only included women whose birth dates and dates of marriage are known within at least 1-2 years, therefore, this is not a comprehensive list.

Livia, wife of Augustus; age 16 when she married Tiberius Claudius Nero in 43 BC

Claudia, wife of Augustus; age 14/15 when she married Augustus in 42 BC

Julia the Elder, daughter of Augustus; age 14 when she married Marcellus in 25 BC

Julia the Younger, daughter of Julia the Elder; age 14 when she married Lucius Aemilius Paullus in 5 BC

Livilla, wife of Gaius Caesar (and later Drusus the Younger); age 12 when she married Gaius Caesar in 1 BC

Agrippina the Elder, daughter of Julia the Elder; age 19 when she married Germanicus in 5 AD

Aemilia Lepida, daughter of Julia the Younger; age 18 when she married Marcus Junius Silanus Torquatus in 13 AD

Julia Livia, wife of Nero Caesar; age 16 when she married Nero in 23 AD

Agrippina the Younger, daughter Agrippina the Elder; age 13 when she married Gnaeus Domitius Ahenobarbus in 28 AD

Julia Livia, daughter of Agrippina the Elder; age 15 when she married Marcus Vinicius in 33 AD

Junia Claudilla, wife of Caligula; age 15 when she married Caligula in 33 AD

Julia Drusilla, daughter of Agripinna the Elder; age 17 when she married Lucius Cassius Longinus in 33 AD

Claudia Antonia, daughter of Claudius; age 13 when she married Gnaeus Pompeius Magnus in 43 AD

Poppaea Sabina, wife of Nero; age 14 when she married Rufrius Crispinus in 44 AD

Claudia Octavia, daughter of Claudius; age 13 when she married Nero in 53 AD

Vibia Sabrina, wife of Hadrian; age 17 when she married Hadrian in 100 AD

Faustina the Younger, wife of Marcus Aurelius; age 14 when she married Marcus in 145 AD

Lucilla, wife of Lucius Verus; age 14-16 when she married Lucius in 164 AD

Bruttia Crispina, wife of Commodus; age 14 when she married Commodus in 178 AD

Vibia Aurelia Sabina, daughter of Marcus Aurelius; age 10 when she married Antistius Burrus in 180 AD

Julia Domna, wife of Septimius Severus; age 17 when she married Septimius in 187 AD

Antonia Gordiana, daughter of Gordian I; age 13 when she married an unnamed senator in 214 AD

Annia Faustina, wife of Elagabalus; age 15 when she married Pomponius Bassus in 216 AD

Sallustia Orbiana, wife of Severus Alexander; age 16 when she married Severus in 225 AD

Tranquillina, wife of Gordian III; age 16 when she married Gordian in 241 AD

Galeria Valeria, daughter of Diocletian; age 27 when she married Galerius in 293 AD

Fausta, daughter of Maximian; age 18 when she married Constantine I in 307 AD

Justina, wife of Magnetius (and later Valentinian I); age 10 when she married Magnetius in 350 AD

Constantia, daughter of Constantius II; age 12 when she married Gratian in 374 AD

The average age at first marriage among these women was 15.

[ancientcharm]

Isabelle Connolly as Antonina in 'Domina', Season 2.

Antonia the Younger, or Antonina (Little Antonia) one of the most respected and beloved women in Rome, was the youngest daughter of Mark Antony and Octavia; niece of Caesar Augustus, daughter-in-law of Empress Livia, sister-in-law of Emperor Tiberius, mother of Emperor Claudius, grandmother of Emperor 'Caligula' and Empress Agrippina the Younger, great-grandmother of Emperor Nero and Empress Octavia, and great-aunt of Empress Valeria Messalina.

Her grandson Caligula wanted to grant her the title of AUGUSTA and she refused, but her son Claudius, upon ascending the throne in 41, named her Augusta as a post-mortem title. The day of Antonia's birthday, January 31, was decreed by Claudius as public holiday.

Antonina had many tragic losses in her life: She was widowed very young with her three very young children, Germanicus, Livilla and Claudius, in 9 a.C, and never wanted to remarry. She really loved her husband Drusus.

She lost her son Germanicus, heir to the throne, who died at the age of 33 under mysterious circumstances (perhaps poisoned) in the year 19 AD. She also lost her daughter Livilla, accused of poisoning her husband, son of Emperor Tiberius (something that could never really be proven) in the year 31.

Lost three of her grandchildren in horrible way: Claudius's first-born son, died at the age of 14 after accidentally choking on a piece of pear; Later the two the eldest sons of Germanicus, falsely accused of conspiracy, died in jail between the years 30 and 33.

She passed away at age 72 during her grandson's reign, luckily for her died months before the horrible death of her grandson Gemellus.

Strange fact: Her grandson Gemellus, Livilla's only son, forced to commit suicide at age 18 on late year 37, was born on the same day that her son Germanicus died (October 10, 19 AD).

Note: The story of Antonia the Younger locking up her own daughter and letting her starve is so credible as the story of "Caligula" giving the position of consul to his horse, or Nero playing the lyre on the terrace while his beloved Rome burned.

Gifs by wolframpant

[meadowlarksabove]

Tales from Arizona 2/?? 

Featuring Gabban during his time as a Decanus and his love affair with a married woman. 

Alternatively: Worshiping Venus while being unlucky in love.

(Bonus notes: It's been really difficult to write in english or even make sense of english sentences. I'm not 100% happy with this, but it's my writing nonetheless and that's the whole reason for this blog lmao)

_____________________________________________________________

Her mural wouldn’t be finished before the first week of summer. The recent restrictions on blue and purple pigments had delayed the artist a month from completing the muses who, robed in their fine silks, danced in a circle of golden bulls. These kinds of personal commissions, regardless of the patron’s wealth and class, weren’t a high priority for traders who’d rather supply their tints for the construction of new Legion monuments. In terms of luxury items like rich paints and varnishes, scarcity existed only for the individual whereas money was no object to their public officials. Now empowered by the increasing value of the Legion denarius, Arizona’s public offices were determined to reshape Flagstaff into the seat of a real empire. 

 Therefore the muses have waited on the back wall of her bedroom for almost a full month, their arms reaching for one another in celebration, though none with hands to close their merry ring. Their smiles glimmered in the tender light of her candles, but their eyes saw nothing through the haze of their colorless pupils. Aida had tried to hide their condition by rearranging her furniture and hanging curtains over the sides, yet nothing could mask the urgency of their joy. They were women whose blurred gaiety reflected a happiness soon to come. 

Aida was like them in both feeling and beauty. She was a woman waiting for her bit of happiness to come back. Drusus, her husband, and father to her firstborn, had yet to return from the battlefields in Utah. Unbeknownst to her, it would be a long time before anyone would return from Lanius’ campaign through the state. She would have to suffer his leave for many months yet. Unlike most marriages in the Legion, Drusus and Aida had known each other before the flames caught their tribe. Perhaps it was in that resonance, where pain met pain, they bonded together. It was rarer still for a pairing to come from the same people as the Legion tended to dissolve any of the social and cultural ties of their annexed nations. Yet Drusus had come up the ranks as a fine warrior, and used his rising authority to justify the marriage. They had even spent the early days of their union settling into their little adobe home, glad to have found someone like themselves in the midst of all their misery. As far as Aida was concerned, Drusus was the perfect husband and the perfect father to her child.

It had been foolish for Gabban to think that anything but distance had led her to other men, and to him. He’d fully deluded himself into believing she was pining for love and not convenience. Aida already had Drusus for romance and marriage, everyone else was an accessory to be worn in his absence. It had been a clever game on her part, and an even better way of keeping her own peace. Although she was married to a well respected man, the horrors of Arizona were vicious and plenty. What better way to keep the vermin at bay than to get a temporary guard dog? 

The plan had worked too well, however, and things had gotten very real for her younger lover. She had invited him into her room one last time to gently break the relationship with excuses or with worry for her husband’s return. But Gabban wanted to fight for a place in her life and couldn’t be deterred. Soon after her third objection he made a suggestion that froze her heart. He offered to kill her husband and later take her as his wife. Aida kept quiet as he assured her that he’d accept her son as his own and could only stare while he pressed feverishly for her approval. In all their time together, Aida had only seen the weak underbelly of her quarry. She had always known Gabban to be affectionate, faithful and easily satisfied. 

This was not that man. All at once she was reminded of the spikes soldered onto his armor, the scars that littered his body and the bloodstains smudged on his leathers. She had tamed this mongrel for a time, but he's proven himself too wild for leashes. Her silence and hardened expression began to clue him in on the reality of the situation. The tick of her arched brow, the deep frown on her beautiful face and the fierceness of her gaze told him more than he’d ever wanted to know. 

Aida had crafted for him a dream, an ideal she never strove for. Their talks of settling during peacetime were only fantasies hung up onto clouds, vague and hopeful, like muses half painted on a wall.

“I get it now...” 

She stepped back and her jewelry glinted prettily in the dim lighting of her bedroom. “You need to leave.” 

It was Gabban’s turn to freeze. She had strung him along, used him, and somehow he loved her all the more for it. Even as he felt the bite of her rejection, he couldn’t stop himself from admiring the way she’d lured him in and made him feel welcome. His body was cold, his soul had left through the soles of his feet, but his love remained forever true. He wanted nothing more than to embrace her again, but the horror dawning in her eyes kept him from doing so. She was ultimately afraid of what he’d do. A soldier of the Legion with a blade on his hip, alone with her in the dead of night, only the very worst could happen. Suddenly, it seemed that neither of them had truly ever known each other. 

“Gabban, I value your kindness and your loyalty to me, but this would have never worked out.” 

He blinked a few times and looked around the room, observing all the little things he’d come to like about her house. The idols beside her bed, her baskets, the patterned drapes, her jewelry box, the unfinished painting- everything that had finally made the world a home to him.

“I shouldn’t have let this happen in the first place. It was great having you with me, but I’ve dragged this on for far too long and now you’re hurt because of it. You’re young, Gabban, and you’re looking for a wife. But the truth is that I’m not looking for a husband, I already have one. I don’t want to be married, because I am already married.” She crossed her arms and her expression softened. “I thought we were on the same page, that you understood that what we were doing wasn’t serious, but I should have really spoken to you about it. I regret doing this to you.” 

“I don’t.” How could she regret this? How could she regret him? 

“It’s already time, Gabban. It’s done. I’m sorry.” 

It felt as if his organs had fallen out of the seams of his flesh and splattered across her wooden floors. Everything that had kept him together snapped like frayed rope. Yet there he stood, unchanged. Gabban couldn’t open his mouth for fear of vomiting, and his hands clenched until he drew blood from his own palms. He had bared his heart to Aida, told her of his life, his experiences, and of the one shadowed memory that still shocked him awake at night. She knew him as a person, not as a soldier or a killer. So was his personhood not good enough? Real enough? He turned away from her and locked eyes with one of the golden bulls. 

Not strong enough?

The thought of looking back never crossed his mind, because nothing crossed his mind but fuzz and static. He walked out of her room in a slow haze and her house seemed large and labyrinthian then. When he had finally made his way out, there were no voices or growls at the back of his head. Gabban journeyed through town in a silence so definite it seemed that all life had been wiped off the face of the planet. Flagstaff had already been heating up for the coming season, but he couldn’t hear the usual chittering of insects and elf owls. There was nothing but night, moon and stars. 

Most of the troops were sleeping or sitting by the fire when Gabban returned to his tent. The second he passed through the heavy flap he collapsed onto the floor. He didn’t scream, he didn’t make a sound, he crawled over to his wash bowl and poured the fresh water over his head. All the strength in his legs was gone, he’d wasted the last of his resolve on the walk back and now he was down for the count. It was a struggle to reach his bed, but when he’d successfully dragged himself atop he quickly reached over the edge and into a private chest. True to the Legion’s philosophy on austerity, Gabban owned but a handful of personal effects, and so it didn't take him long to find what he was searching for. 

Brilliant, laughter-loving goddess. Delight of gods and men, sea-born, secretive and with a power most divine. She who adorned Pandora with her golden belt so that she could be for men the happiest of their miseries. Whisperer, killer and enemy to the sane. Venus, goddess of love. 

Kill me.

Her shape fit perfectly in the hollow of his palm, subtly curved to give the impression of a feminine silhouette, Her face chipped with an expression of godly serenity. The crudeness of Her idol was not Her own, but a flaw born out of the callousness of an unbelieving sculptor. Yet Gabban had faith all the same. He knew Her, felt Her, and had smelled the scents of Her ambrosia in the climax of his episodes. She had been with him during the best and worst days of his life. Love, Hers and his, were drops of his blood, the warmth of his breath and the song of his voice. 

Gabban looked into the ovals of Her eyes and wept soundlessly. Though he prayed to Her the most and dutifully saw to Her rituals, he’d also done nothing but fail Her. To worship Venus was to have worshiped the sweetness of a lover’s kiss, yet his lips only ever brittled the soil they touched. He’d seen the happiness of blessed pairs many times, though his own partners never confessed to such joys. Was he cursed? Was he corrupted? If not, then why was his love wrong? Worse than poison and waste, his love was like a fruit left to rot on the vine. This fault was not Hers however, but his, a part of his vile make. He knew the truth of his filth and wickedness laid deep in his being, yet Her power was said to supersede all evil. She had existed long before men could even think of the first sin. Nothing should have been impossible for a goddess of such antiquity, Her love was meant to be stronger than any of his mortal evils, and so the flaw remained his own. It was likely he wasn’t even worthy of Her help. 

Take this love away from me.  

He pressed the idol to his chest and burst into another bout of tears. Gabban had felt with Aida the same fluttering in his chest that he’d experienced with Sebastian. Though where Sebastian had ultimately left him in death, she had now left him in life. Worse still, she had loved her husband all throughout their relationship. What he thought had been his chance to live in Venus’ grace, had been the plot of a brilliant woman. He felt proud of Aida in some ways, and flattered to have been the hapless prey in her hunt. Yet he’d been toyed with, used for her benefit, until the expression of his love emerged from the froth. And it had emerged not as a goddess, but as a shadow on the sea, the shade of a hound. He’d thought of biting her throat the second she stepped back. 

But he hadn’t. She was still blameless in his mind, her cunning was but a sword in a warrior’s hand, a cruel necessity in an even crueler world. He would have done the same in her position, in fact, he would have done worse. Though understanding something with the mind wasn’t like understanding something with the heart. Gabban held onto his goddess tightly and prayed She bash Her scepter against his skull. Why should he keep living with the wound in his chest? What good was there in living wrong, loving wrong, and in being wrong. Wrong as a soldier, wrong as a lover, wrong as a servant, and wrong as a mongrel. 

Mother of love, apparent and unseen. Torturer of the flesh and conjurer of madness, I beg you to kill my heart, and to forgive me. I’ve been a fool…

Gabban prayed until the figure in his hands seemed a blur and his eyes fell into darkness. 

There were no dreams that night. Though his heart pattered restlessly in its cage, he never once stirred with panic or with the familiar animal fear. Instead he woke up in time to greet the dawning sun, as all the while he thought he smelled perfume on his cot. He felt the idol still clutched to his chest, then drew Her to his lips and kissed Her. “I will suffer for you. Always.” Carefully, he placed Her among the rest of his belongings and shut Her away for safety. She would always be his dearest treasure.

He undid his armor, cleaned himself and had been washing his mouth when a courier called for him. At first he thought it had been something urgent, but the courier seemed as confused as he was to be disturbed so early in the morning. They had brought with them a basket from Gabban’s centurion. Centurion Gnaeus had sent his decanus a gift of assorted bird meats and rooster feathers, beneath which he’d included bundles of expensive incense. The messenger hadn’t been briefed with the purpose of their delivery, and fortunately seemed wholly oblivious to its meaning. For Gabban’s part, he looked at the feathers with great apprehension until he recognized the taste of saltwater lingering on his tongue.

I will suffer for you. Always. 

“Please give our centurion my thanks, and tell him that I will meet with him soon.”

[modwyr]

official domina s2 thoughts are: suffered the same pacing issues as s1 what with trying to fit ten years of history into 8 episodes, and unfortunately this is also trying to cover a period where 3 major characters all die, so agrippa, octavia, and drusus all drew short straws in terms of this. however on the positive i liked that much more attention was given to the younger kids, particularly antony's (im biased) and i think antonina was the star of the season - her and drusus were sooo good and i loved the feeling that they were too good for this and that they were always doomed for that. also i loved the agrippa/livia stuff, it was really good and they had great chemistry, i only wish there was more time for it but alas. overall another 7/10 because i did have fun and i think the acting and costumes were great