#essbert

[pressedinthepages]

Porcelain

Whoopsie...surprise @sometimesiwrite :D

also! the corset is inspired by this work of art.

Rating: E

Relationship: Lambert/Essi

Content Tags: smut, fluff, established relationship, reunions, porn with feelings

Summary: While at a banquet, Lambert stumbles across someone he hadn't expected.

Lambert huffed. He was leaning on the balcony of a castle overlooking the tumultuous waves crashing beneath the light of the waning moon. The breeze chilled him to the bone, yet another sign that he should begin his travels north, back to the keep. He’d pushed it, passing through a town on the coast with a siren problem. Odd, considering that he wasn’t in fucking Skellige, but it was bound to be easy coin for an easy contract.

And it was. A few bombs tossed, half of a potion bottle downed, a few new nicks on his sword, and Lambert was ready to take his jingling coin pouch and leave the town behind. Yet, the Lord insisted on a feast in his honor, and judging from the look lingering behind his eyes, Lambert didn’t have much of an option but to attend.

It wasn’t terrible, Lambert had to admit. The food was plentiful and fresh, and the wine didn’t taste like he had licked the inner sole of his boot. He knew that the people were not really celebrating him, but of finally being rid of the beasts that had been plaguing them. And he couldn’t blame them for their wary eyes, the tinge of sour fear dripping from the pores behind their ears.

Didn’t mean he enjoyed it.

And, once everyone was sufficiently drunk enough to start dancing, jumping and whooping with delight and glee, Lambert knew he had to make his escape. Not terribly far, as he’d been offered a room in the castle for the evening and he wasn’t about to give that up, so he trudged up the staircases to his assigned dwelling and stripped away his doublet, leaving him in his trousers and light linen shirt. He was lucky, as he was far enough from the banquet that the din of the townspeople’s merry making was a mere tingling in the recesses of his senses.

Although, it seemed that he hadn’t found a remote enough spot. A set of footsteps were making their way up the winding stairs, and stopped just shy of his door. He’d left the door ajar on purpose, as it didn’t have a lock, so he’d be able to hear and see any potential threat easier. Lambert turned and was faced with a vision that could’ve only been born from his most starlit dreams.

A young woman, with golden hair spilling in waves over her slender shoulders, stood in his doorway. She was bathed in the soft light from the moon, illuminating her pale skin and her wide cerulean blue eyes. Her cheeks were flushed pink from the spirits on her tongue, and her lips were stained with the rosy hue of flowers burst from the bloom.

And for fuck’s sake, she was dressed as though blessed by the Gods themselves. A supple skirt the color of midnight spilled from her waist, with the hem bunched over one of her knees to draw the long line of her leg down to her slippers. A corset was tied onto her chest, though it was as if liquid porcelain in that same blue that dwelled in the night sky had been poured over her skin and painted with swirls of leaves that hypnotized any onlooker into a state of awe. It was gilded in golden ornamental swirls that cupped her breasts and drew the line of her waist, and sapphire gems and golden chains dripped enticingly from her hips and down her thighs.

“Essi?” Lambert breathed, drawing his brows together, almost unable to believe his eyes. Though, he knew it was her. Only she smelled of lanolin and citrus and verbena, and the soft musk that was truly her own. It felt like Lambert had broken through the water’s surface to finally gasp fresh air that had been held out of reach for too long.

The young woman grinned. “Lambert. Oh, how I’ve missed you.”

He crossed the room in long strides, propelled by a desperation deep in his gut. He swept her into his arms, glancing his fingers over the nape of her neck as he held her. “I didn’t know it was possible to miss someone so much.”

Essi trailed her hands up Lambert’s shoulders and into his hair. “I’ve longed for you in unspeakable ways, dear Witcher. And tracking you down was no easy feat, in itself.”

Lambert crooked his brow and set her back down. “You…searched for me? Why?”

“Because you are worth it.” And if that didn’t nail Lambert right in the gut. Essi said it so simply, so easily. So…truthfully. All his life, Lambert didn’t believe that he was worth more than the measly coin he was paid to do his job.

But Essi? Every time that their paths crossed, Lambert felt more human than he’d ever thought himself capable of. It was dizzying, intoxicating, the way that her words weaved their way around his heart.

“Stay with me tonight,” he whispered into Essi’s ear, dragging his nose over the soft swell of her cheekbone.

Essi grinned and reached behind her, shoving the heavy wooden door shut. “There is nowhere I’d rather be.”

They surged into each other, crashing their lips together and reaching desperately for the places within that beckoned without words. Lambert cupped her face in his hands and they staggered together towards the bed. Essi kicked off her slippers without a care, though Lambert stumbled and hopped as he tried to blindly remove his boots. They clattered aside along with his socks as Essi’s fingers flitted through the laces on his trousers. They came undone with ease, and her hand was warm when she reached in and wrapped herself around his arousal.

Lambert moaned into her mouth and his hips thrust into her grasp as he trailed his hands down her back to the ties on her corset. They were surprisingly simple, needing only a few well-measured tugs to loosen the corset’s hold. Essi’s breath came deeper, harder as he peeled the ornate garment up over her head and arms. Lambert set it down carefully, letting the gems tink happily against the cold stone floor.

He brought his lips back to her and fit his hands at her waist. One hand moved to her hip to pull at the ties on her skirt, while the other roamed up to palm at her breast. Essi arched into his touch and nipped at his lip as he kneaded her tender flesh, and Lambert groaned into her mouth.

“Too good to me, you know that?” The skirt fell to the ground as Essi tugged Lambert’s shirt from his trousers. He reached up and pulled it off himself, sending it flying across the room while Essi worked on shimmying his trousers down his legs. His cock bobbed heavily as he stepped out of the pants, and he watched Essi hook her thumbs into the edges of her underthings and push them down as well, leaving them both bare and wanting.

Lambert took a deep breath, tasting the heady musk of her arousal on the air. She was always so sweet, though never cloying. It made his head swim as he reached out to her, pulling her back into him. He spun them both around and guided her down to the mattress. Essi smiled up at him, dancing her long fingers over his brow and down his jaw.

“Go on, Lambert,” Essi breathed, her pulse thrumming beneath her skin, “take me.”

Lambert scoffed lightly and settled himself on his knees, still hovering over her. One of his hands traveled downward, past her collarbones, over her nipples, along the soft plush of her belly, through the dark, curly hairs at her core. “What do you take me for? I’d be an idiot not to take my time with you.”

Essi chuckled as Lambert’s finger trailed down further, slipping through her folds and gathering some of her slick. “Your words, not mine.”

Lambert hummed as he slowly circled her clitoris with just the barest bit of pressure. Her legs spread further as he touched her, using every drop in his well of patience to make best use of their time together. He leaned down and wrapped his lips around one of her nipples, lightly sucking at it and licking at the pebbled peak, listening to the echoing thunder of her heart beneath her ribs.

He slid one of his fingers inside of her, feeling her pulse around him as he moved to her other breast. Essi was beautiful, always, but spread out beneath him, aching with pleasure that burned in the marrow of her bones, oh that was where she shone. Lambert thrust slowly, using the heel of his hand to keep gently grinding over her clitoris as her hands roved over his shoulders and back up into his hair.

Another finger slipped inside next to the first and Essi groaned low from behind her teeth. She gave Lambert’s hair a tug, and Lambert gave the underside of her breast a nip in response, just a glance of his teeth as he cast his golden eyes up to her.

“Lambert,” she gasped as he crooked his fingers, bumping against the tight bundle of nerves locked away inside of her, “I need you inside of me. Please-”

Never one to deny Essi, Lambert adjusted himself. He pushed up to kneel and slid his fingers out of her, fitting his hands behind her knees and spreading her to lock her ankles at the small of his back. He gave himself a few cursory tugs with his palm before dragging the flushed tip of his cock through her folds that glistened with her arousal. “You’re sure?”

“If you don’t get your cock in me right now-nnnngg-”

Lambert pushed in profoundly slowly, dragging through every slick inch of her walls until their hips met. His breath came in desperate gasps as he slid back out, setting a steady rhythm. Essi met his thrusts with her own, their hips rocking together in tandem while both of their climaxes loomed in the distance.

“Fuck, I don’t know how I got so lucky,” Lambert grit his teeth and grunted as his hips lost rhythm. He reached down and pulled one of Essi’s legs to rest on his shoulder and drove into her, pounding deep and unyielding in his pursuit of her pleasure. “You’re more than I could’ve ever dreamed I could have in my life, gods you drive me crazy-”

Essi moaned as his cock hit that spot inside of her relentlessly, sending stars flying behind her eyes. She reached down and grasped for Lambert’s hand, holding him fast while her eyes rolled back in her head.

“Oh yeah, you like that, don’t you, just like that-” Lambert brought her leg back down but kept his hold on it while he leaned over, practically bending her in half while he thrusted. One particular rock of his hips pulled a whine from her chest, and she surged up to meet his lips in desperation to meet her own end.

Lambert kissed her with intensity while he felt her clench around him, angling his hips to hit perfectly each time while she froze in suspended bliss before she plummeted into her climax. She writhed and gasped, her nails digging into his scalp and scratching across his skin.

His mind went blank as soon as Essi’s orgasm overtook her, now past the point of no return as his own pleasure mounted. It built in the small of his groin, bubbling and growing, a wound spring that tightened with each surge of her body around him.

Lambert spilled within her as his climax sent him spiraling into oblivion, scrunching his eyes shut and likely leaving bruises in the pattern of his fingers on the back of Essi’s thigh. He spent hard, driving his cock as deep as he could reach while his hips stuttered and his grip on her hand held fast.

Breathing deeply through his nose, Lambert brought himself back into the present. He carefully slipped his cock from Essi’s slick grasp as he kissed her softly, pouring every ounce of admiration that he could find within him into their embrace. He turned his every touch into something tender, his hands smoothing up her skin, his nose trailing over her cheeks.

Essi chuckled lightly. “Quite a reunion, I’d say.”

Lambert hummed. “I have to agree.”

“You’re leaving tomorrow?”

Lambert sighed and met her gaze. She wore her heart in her eyes, though there was always something otherworldly locked within the sadness. He nodded. “It’s almost winter. I need to go back, to…”

Essi cupped his cheek in her hand. “I know. And I’ll be waiting for you when you return.”

Lambert grinned. “I can make it easier for you to find me…meet me at the inn at Ard Carraigh with the bluebirds on the sign. I’ll head there at the first sign of thaw.”

She smiled softly, guiding them to roll over onto their sides atop the mussed blankets. “I’ll hold you to that.”

Lambert kissed the crown of her head as she lay on his chest, already heavy with sleep. “I know you will.”

[pressedinthepages]

Urge

Shared some smut prompts with @continentcakeshop and I got a ton of suggestions! Here we gooooooo...@sometimesiwrite suggested #4 with Essi and Lambert <3

Rating: E

Relationship: Lambert/Essi

Content Tags: smut, public sex, fingering, voyeurism, exhibitionism, modern au

Summary: Essi and Lambert have a date night, visiting a sleepy diner and taking advantage of their privacy.

Lambert’s fingers trailed little circles over Essi’s thigh, just north of her knee. His milkshake was melting in the tall glass sitting on the table, only a few sips taken through the bright pink straw. His pinkie glanced a bit higher, just barely slipping beneath the hem of her skirt.

Essi elbowed Lambert with a grin and a sideways glance. “Lambert…not right now, you troublemaker.”

Lambert hummed and frowned dramatically, tracing his fingers even higher and across the soft insides of her thigh. “Oh, come on. I know you didn’t pick the table in the corner for nothing.”

“Behave,” Essi hissed, eyeing their server approaching with their ticket. She smiled and crossed her legs beneath the table. Lambert huffed and squeezed her knee.

“Y’all want a cup to take that shake to-go?” Their server smiled and rested her hand on her hip.

Lambert shook his head. “Nah, no thanks. Mind if we just sit here for a bit?”

The young woman looked around the near-empty diner, at the two other groups of people at their own tables on the other side of the room. “Not at all. I’ll leave ya be, flag me down if ya need anythin’.”

Essi tutted in Lambert’s ear as their server walked away. She uncrossed her legs, shifting her hips just slightly to invite Lambert’s fingers back to their earlier musings along her skin.

“So,” Lambert whispered, nosing along Essi’s jaw and dragging his fingers beneath her skirt, almost to the crest of her hip. Goosebumps echoed in his wake, and he relished the hitch in her breath as he wrapped his other arm around her shoulders. “We gonna get out of here, or do you want to stay?”

Essi sighed and reached for the milkshake, the glass frigid and sweating under her fingers. She spread her thighs minutely as she sipped through the straw, moaning filthily, just loud enough for Lambert to hear as she swallowed. “We can stay.”

Lambert hummed happily, digging the pads of his fingers into the soft flesh of Essi’s thigh. “Want to run to the restroom, bring those panties back to me? I’ll keep them safe…”

Essi smirked and just barely shook her head. “Don’t need to.”

He scrunched his brow at her, his mouth suddenly dry. He tracked his fingers up higher into the crook of her hip, down into the soft curls at the apex of her thighs. “No panties? Oh, you absolute menace, you spoil me…”

Turning her head and baring her neck, Essi chuckled lowly. She felt Lambert’s hand smooth over her mound before traveling further down, circling broadly around her entrance and through the delicate folds nestled away. “Just stay focused, darling. I’d like to finish my shake before we leave…”

“Oh, you’ll finish all right, that I can promise.”

Essi rolled her eyes good-naturedly as Lambert traced his nose down the line of her throat. Her body clenched around nothing while Lambert’s fingers kept their lazy meandering, though she felt him slip and collect her slick before circling back up with a bit more pressure. Her eyes fluttered shut as he rolled around her clit, just enough to coax her body and her mind into that hazy space of arousal.

“Mm, you’re so wet,” Lambert hummed and adjusted his hips, ignoring his own growing arousal between his legs. Essi smelled of sugar and rosin and spring berries, drawing Lambert in and curling around him.

“You’re a bad influence,” Essi breathed, arching her back and scooting into Lambert’s touch. She spread her legs a bit more, biting her lip as Lambert slowly pushed one of his long, nimble fingers inside of her. It was his middle finger, she knew, for his pointer and ring fingers rested on the sensitive flesh around her entrance, only adding to the sensations shooting through the basest parts of her brain.

Lambert chuckled and nipped at Essi’s shoulder as he flexed his arm, flicking his wrist and dragging his finger slowly out and back in again. Essi grabbed onto his arm, her fingers grasping onto the edge of the rolled-up sleeve on his blue-striped button-up. “You think these people know? I don’t. If they knew, gods, they wouldn’t be able to take their eyes off of you. Fuckin’ gorgeous, you know that? Can’t get enough of you-”

Essi keened through the back of her teeth, low and long and just barely audible to Lambert’s ears. His eyes shut as he indulged in the sound, that desperate link to her pleasure that encouraged him along. He slipped in a second finger, his ring finger, resting his pinkie where it had been on her soft flesh around her slit.

“Go on, Lambert,” Essi’s voice was a hushed whisper, ghosting over the hair on his temple, “please-”

Lambert crooked his fingers up, stroking back and forth over the bundle of nerves inside of her and flicking his thumb over her clit at the same pace. Faster and faster, frantic snaps of her hips and darts of her eyes around the near-empty diner leading Essi closer to her climax by the moment. Her slick noises and the scent of her arousal had Lambert’s mind swimming and his own cock hard as steel in his trousers.

Essi’s hips lost rhythm, desperately meeting his hand and covering her mouth with her own. She clenched around him, seizing in his grasp and stalling for the space of a heartbeat before plummeting. Stars exploded behind her eyes, pleasure blooming from her core and radiating through every ounce of her skin. Lambert’s lips burned brands into the crook of her neck as she rolled her hips slowly, coaxing her orgasm into the finest recesses of her mind. Lambert withdrew his fingers, rubbing against her core softly, almost petting as she returned to herself.

“Mm, there’s my girl,” Lambert brought his fingers to his lips, darting his tongue out and licking them clean. He reached into his pocket and fished out a travel-pack of tissues, ripping one out and bringing it back beneath the table. He gently wiped her clean as her chest heaved with long, heavy breaths. “Y’alright?”

Essi swallowed thickly. “M-mhm. Yeah, ‘m good. Fuck, thank you.”

Lambert chuckled and stuck the soiled tissue in his pocket to dispose of later. “Oh, no thanking me yet. I’m not nearly finished with you.”

Essi smirked and looked out of the window, eyeing their car in the parking lot. “Take me home, I’ll make sure you finish before we get there…at least once.”

Lambert winked. “Don’t have to tell me twice.”

[pressedinthepages]

Trapped

got the next fill for the August Bingo for @rawrkinjd (also im not sure if my tags have been working here on these...so... :D)

thanks so much to @major-trouble and @tumbleweedtech for helping me Make Decisions

Prompt: Upper Right (a blue bird inside a small, dome-shaped cage against a grey background)

Relationship: Lambert/Essi

Rating: T

Content Warnings: lil bit spooky, curse, True Love's Kiss Breaks A Curse, Lambird

Summary: A poem of a quest to find Essi's lost Witcher.

The moon hung low

In the sky, framed by

Crackling clouds that rumbled

And tore at the darkness beneath.

Light as a robin’s feather,

Her feet flew through the woods,

Chasing a ghost of light

That wisped along an unseen trail.

Errant branches and fallen logs

Clawed at the hem of her skirts,

Calling to her,

To drag her into the mossy earth.

She stumbled and twisted

And bumped shoulders with the odd tree,

Still keeping her keen blue eyes

Set on the bouncing white light.

She burst into a clearing,

Finding the wisp had faded away

Into nothingness.

A great tangle of branches

Grew from the forest floor

And built themselves

Into a cage, a prison.

Essi wandered closer,

Beckoned by the ethereal blue glow

From the heartbeat within.

A twitter, like windchimes

That only caught against themselves

On the stormiest nights.

A blue bird,

Nestled among the wicked branches

And chirping up at her

With honey-golden eyes.

Essi reached out,

Her fingers sparking with

Chaos and the things that tied the world

To the roots of the trees.

A key, out of thin air,

Fell into her palm,

Cold and devoid

Of whence it had come.

Her fingers twisted the key

In a lock that she hadn’t seen,

Clicking and opening the mechanism

With a simple flick of her wrist.

An opening in the branches,

Just barely enough

For the bird

To make his escape.

Though he did not erupt into flight,

As Essi had expected.

Instead, he dropped onto the mossy ground

And hopped on spindly legs.

Searching.

All the while chirping and trilling,

Carrying on what felt like

A conversation

With the Bard who felt

All too familiar.

He bounced and flapped his little wings

As he dove headfirst

Into a long overgrown bush,

Leaving Essi waiting patiently behind him.

He exited the way he had gone in,

Bouncing with his rear in the air,

Though he now had a long silver chain

With a wolf’s head held in his beak.

Essi gasped and ran her fingers

Over the simple silver,

Feeling it hum and call

Beneath her hands.

The little bird dropped his treasure

Before perching himself onto

The long spindly bone

Of Essi’s finger.

She brought him to her face,

Scrunching her brow

And peering at him

Through her golden curls.

The bird leaned forward,

Almost enough to have had him

Careen back to the ground,

But let his head bump against Essi’s instead.

A shock, a bolt of lightning

Swam behind her eyes,

The vision of a Witcher cursed

And imprisoned, with naught a hope to have.

“Lambert?”

A whisper, barely louder than the wind

That swirled around them

And threatened to carry them away.

He narrowed his eyes at her,

And she could only imagine

The tongue lashing she shall receive

Once this was all said and done.

Essi was no sorceress,

No curse-breaker,

And she only had the stories of children

To rely on.

Oh, what the hell.

“Lambert, I’m going to kiss you.”

A quiet whistle in return,

Almost sad as Lambert turned his

Golden eyes to shine into her blues.

She leaned forward and scrunched her eyes closed,

Gently placing her lips to his hard beak

And hoped to all hopes

That this worked.

Soon enough though,

It was not a beak that she was kissing,

But instead a pair of human lips,

Soft and warm and sliding with her own.

She broke away with a gasp for air,

Finding the familiar face of her Witcher

Knelt on the ground before her,

Naked as the day he was born.

She chuckled, reaching up

To ruffle his normally meticulously tamed

Dark hair, that still held a few errant feathers

In its nest.

“Well,” Essi smiled

As she ran her hand

Down the line of Lambert’s jaw,

Secretly thanking the wisp that led her here,

“I suppose it was my turn to save you.”

[pressedinthepages]

Decembert Day 29 - Carols/Singing

@continentcakeshop thanks as always for the encouragement <3 also, this song is one of the oldest known medieval love songs :)

Rating: T

Content Tags: TW3 Lambert, yearning, first kiss, heckin soft

Summary: As Lambert completes his nightly ritual, a song comes into his mind, and Essi joins with the words.

The breeze tickled the back of Lambert’s neck as he sat hunched over his sword, swiping his whetstone down the edge over and over. The woods that their camp was in were quiet, only the occasional hooting owl breaking up the crackling embers in the fire and the calm heart pounding in his companion’s chest.

Lambert sighed to himself, twisting his sword over to run the stone over the other side. He started to hum quietly to himself, a random medley that danced through his mind without really needing any extra thought. He could feel Essi’s piercing eyes watching him across the fire, but he paid her no mind. He knew that she, unlike some bards that he knew, was comfortable with quiet. So he continued in his task, intent on finishing sharpening his sword before retiring to sleep for the night.

Soon, though, he heard her humming along with him. He loved her voice. It was soft and a little raspy, as if her passion laid in the back of her throat just waiting to bleed out. As Essi’s hums joined his in harmony, he suddenly recognized the melody for what it was. A love song that Essi had written as they walked, side by side along the Path. Lambert knew every word, held onto them like falling leaves in the night.

Lambert stopped his whetstone and set it aside, looking over at Essi where she already watched him. She held out her hand, palm up, an invitation. One that Lambert took, fixated on the relaxed curve of her fingers.

He sat at her side, feeding from the warmth of her more than the fire at his feet. Her lips were turned in a soft smile, waiting for his lead. Their breaths held in the space between them as Lambert made his choice.

In quiet, clear words, Lambert sang. He sang the words that haunted him at night, trailed behind him as he fought away the monsters that peeled at his core.

Merry it is while summer lasts

With fowl’s song.

But now nears the wind’s blast

And weather strong.

Essi gasped out a breath, something fleeting and tasting of sweet summer rain. Her hand grasped onto Lambert’s knee as she looked at him in disbelief. “You know the words?”

Lambert nodded, unable to look away from her riverstone blue eyes. “They follow me. I’ve decided…to let them catch me.”

Essi’s hand came to his cheek, resting warmly on his skin. “And me? As I follow you?”

“I’m caught.”

They breathed in each other’s air, drawing closer until their noses brushed and their hands began to wander unbidden. The last few words were easy, easier than the hearts beating in their chests.

Oh, oh! How this night is long!

And I with very much wrong

Sorrow and mourn and fast.

The silence between them was deafening before they both surged to fill the void, their lips crashing in a wave that rivaled storms on the seas. Lambert sighed into Essi’s lips, wrapping his sword-calloused hands around her waist and holding her fast, as though he feared she would drift away on a winter breeze. Essi threaded her fingers up into his hair with the same fervor, her nails on his scalp grounding Lambert away from the spiral that his mind so willed him to fall into.

They parted, resting their foreheads together as their chests heaved with heavy breaths taken to desperately fill their lungs. Essi chuckled, a light sound to break through the outside of Lambert’s shell. “I am glad, Lambert, to have caught you. Finally.”

Lambert sighed, a soft smile escaping his lips. “As am I, to have let you.”

[pressedinthepages]

Allure

next fill for @witcher-rarepair-summer-bingo

also big thanks to @childoffantasy for beta-ing and @sometimesiwrite for helping me spin this story together <3

Prompt: Non-human genitalia

Relationship: Lambert/Essi

Rating: Explicit

Content Warnings: siren!essi, smut, non-human genitalia, discussion of a/b/o dynamics, cum play, squirting (sort of), a tad bit of overstimulation, oral (f/non-human receiving), penetrative sex.

Summary: Lambert hears a voice calling over the cliffs and instead of finding a threat, he finds some welcoming company.

Scents of salt and sea-crisp breeze filled Lambert’s senses as he tred beneath the moonlit coast. His coin purse was light, and he had found himself searching the shoreline for drowner nests or rotfiend camps. He had been walking for hours and hadn’t seen hide nor tail of any of the scaly fuckers, couldn’t even smell the deathly sweet tinge of decay on the air. Lambert had just about given up when he heard a voice, sweet and ethereal, calling out in a language unknown over the craggly cliffs.

His medallion hummed lightly on his chest and he tred carefully, his boots pushing through damp sand and sea glass until he rounded the base of a low cliff. Lambert stopped dead in his tracks when he saw her, golden-blond hair glowing in the light of the moon and the stars where she stood atop the cliff. She looked down, her voice carrying over the waves and the unrelenting breeze that threatened to lift her away. She held out her hand and stopped singing, and Lambert’s medallion stilled on his chest. He raised his brow, gave a quick glance around, and sighed.

Eskel’s been getting to me.

Lambert hopped up onto the lowest rock at the base of the cliff and followed a hollowed out trail set deep into the dark stone, keeping his steps light and his hand braced in the sign for Quen, just in case. The wind whipped through his short dark hair as he crested the bend, finding lucious beds of grass leading straight to the woman’s bare feet.

She stood with her back to him, her shoulders and hips relaxed. She wore a simple dress that was so thin, so light, that it was almost sheer, the curves of her shoulders and her waist silently taunting Lambert from where she stood. Her hair fell in light blond waves down the line of her back, dancing and twirling in the wind. Lambert took a deep breath in, trying to decipher what was her and what was picked up on the air.

His mind swam with her. She was of chaos and serenity, spice and salt, a sweet spring day and the sharp tang of poison. She was dangerous, and Lambert was fucking hooked.

Lambert cleared his throat and kept his eye trained on her, waiting for the pin to drop. “You uh...you alright?”

The breeze carried her breathy chuckle to his ears as she slowly turned around. Her eyes were blue, and just a bit too...shiny? Sparkly? Both? Eh, who gives a shit. “I’m doing quite alright, thank you for asking.”

Lambert took a hesitant step forward, keeping his hands by his sides to show no outward signs of aggression. “What are you doing up here?”

The woman glanced around and shrugged, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “Singing.”

“To?”

“Whoever will listen.”

“Uh huh. Right…” Lambert nodded and took another step towards the woman. “What’s your name?”

The woman smiled kindly, showing canines that were maybe just a little too sharp, but it could’ve just been a trick of the light. “I am called Essi. And you?”

“Lambert.”

“A witcher, correct?” Lambert nodded and Essi crossed her arms. “Have you been sent to kill me?”

Lambert furrowed his brow as he held the intense gaze of the woman with the magical voice before him. “Should I have been?”

Essi shrugged and gestured widely to the bare evening around them. “People, these days, tend to fear what they deem ‘different.’ I am no exception.”

Lambert stepped closer once more, enough to feel the subtle shift in the air around her and catch the tinge of salt on his tongue. “You look human. I can tell you have magic, and that song...it’s enchanting...and not just in the complementary way.”

“You’d be correct. It’s a siren song, meant to ward off predators.”

Lambert nodded. “Part siren, then? Huh. How’d that happen?”

Essi tilted her head and sighed. “I’d...rather not get into it. It’s not a terribly happy story, I’m afraid.”

“Fair enough,” Lambert crossed his arms and breathed in the cool night air. “Are you...safe here? I mean, as safe as someone can be nowadays…”

Essi shook her head, her golden curls bouncing over her shoulders and around her collarbones. “Not really, no. I’m headed for Skellige, though. Just wanted one last night here…”

Lambert cleared his throat, watching her sparkling eyes dance over the tides. “You uh...you need any help? With anything?”

She looked back at him, her eyes slowly dragging down his body and back up again, burning with their intensity. Something darker, sweeter floated across the breeze and Lambert could almost taste the honey-sweet aroma that threatened to send him under.

“I could use your company for the night, if you’re offering.” Essi reached up and undid the button on one of her shoulders, letting the gauzy fabric fall open. Lambert swallowed thickly as the curve of her breast was bathed in moonlight, her nipple already pebbled from the chilly breeze that could cut through skin.

“Y-yeah. Yeah, I’m offering,” he said, closing the distance between them and finally reaching his hand out to touch her. Essi’s fingers tangled with his, pulling a shuddering gasp from the back of Lambert’s throat at just the simplest contact.

“Sensitive,” Essi drawled, baring her throat as her eyes gleaned down to where Lambert’s pulse beat beneath his wrist, “good.”

She pushed him gently as she stepped around him, still holding his hand and pulling him along. Lambert watched the waves of grass skirt along her ankles as she stopped, the wind still carrying her in an endless dance. Locking her eyes with his, Essi brought Lambert’s hand up to her breast and pushed his fingers into the tender flesh.

“Don’t-uh…” Lambert glanced around even as the insistent thrum of her heart sang up through her impossibly soft skin, “don’t you wanna find somewhere more private?”

Essi shook her head. “No one will bother us. The song, meant for so long to keep away those that would wish us harm, now keeps any and all at bay. The only reason you were able to find me is because I allowed it.”

“Why?” Lambert breathed, his hand resting still above Essi’s heart.

“Must there be an answer?” Essi tilted her head and ran her fingers down the line of Lambert’s jaw, watching the muscles shift and twitch as he clenched down and drew in a shuddering breath. Her other hand drew up past Lambert’s on her chest and released the other bit of her dress and let it fall to her hips, revealing the plane of her chest and the dips of her collar. Her nipples, dusky pink against the pale alabaster of her skin, pebbled in the cool air and Lambert was overcome with the urge to wrap his lips around them and drag his tongue over the sensitive nubs.

Lambert swallowed thickly and shook his head. “N-no, I guess not.”

“Good,” Essi whispered like leaves on the wind as she pushed up to her tiptoes and finally closed the miniscule distance that was left between them.

Lambert inhaled sharply through his nose at the first glance of her lips against his, his skin almost surprised at the gentle touch after so long without. She tasted of ocean air, light and crisp and it was almost as if he could feel the call to go deeper to sea in her kiss. He carefully squeezed the flesh of her breast in his hand as he brought his other to rest comfortably on her hip, toying with the edge of her dress where it still sat, momentarily forgotten.

He deepened the kiss, swiping his tongue over the seam of Essi’s mouth and groaning when her lips parted, her fingers threading up into his hair. He felt just the barest tingle of her magic along his scalp and down the line of his spine as she pulled him impossibly closer, slotting his leg between her own and dragging herself along his thigh. Lambert’s medallion offered a little vibration on his chest, which was dutifully ignored by its host.

Essi ran her hands down Lambert’s neck and to the straps of his scabbards on his shoulder. “May I?” Essi breathed into his mouth.

Lambert took a deep breath and brought his head back enough to look into her too-blue eyes, searching for that last little hint of ill-will that would make him take his swords and scram. All he found, though, were pupils widened with lust and lips swollen and shining from his own. He felt her fingers fiddling with the metal buckle on his shoulder and he nodded. “Yeah. Yeah alright. Go ahead.”

Essi hummed with a cheeky smile as she slid the leather out of the buckle, taking his swords, so deadly and threatening to anyone who would wind up on the wrong end of them, and setting them safely on the ground with a reverence one would typically reserve for precious jewels or beloved mementos. She undid the ties at his neck holding his jerkin closed, sliding her hands beneath the heavy armoured fabric and pushing it off of his shoulders and down his arms.

Lambert felt struck dumb as she went about undressing him, his arms hanging limp at his sides as his jerkin was set down on the ground with as much care as his swords had been. Essi fiddled with the ties on his codpiece, her fingers just barely glancing over his cock that had been willfully ignored for far too long.

He surged forward, digging the pads of his fingers into the softness of Essi’s hips as he fit his nose into the crook of her neck. He breathed her in while she yanked his linen shirt from where it had been tucked into his trousers. Essi’s hands, while still gentle and deliberate, moved with fervor as Lambert nipped and sucked on the delicate skin above where her pulse beat erratically.

Her hands were oddly cool on his skin as she pushed his shirt up over his head, Lambert’s lips leaving Essi’s neck for only the briefest moment as it was shoved aside. He brought her back to him, pressing their bare chests together and rubbing his thumb over one of her nipples, relishing the throaty gasp torn from her chest. He could feel the pull of chaos building behind his belly button, the fish hook yanking backwards into places within him yet unknown. Goosebumps erupted along Essi’s skin as Lambert’s hand passed over it.

“Your fingers tingle with magic hidden beneath the skin,” Essi whispered as he dragged his hands down over her stomach.

“Not like yours,” he said, pressing his lips into the hollow of her collar, “mine was trained into me. You...you’ve got magic older than what time can rightly tell.”

Lambert slid his hand down to the apex of Essi’s thighs and went to run his fingers along her slit. Though...it didn’t feel quite how he was expecting, even through her dress. But gods, he felt the gasp that she bled into his mouth like a punch to the gut, and he really couldn’t find himself to care just what lay beneath the thin layer of windswept linen.

Essi’s nails dug into the meat of Lambert’s shoulders as his hands dipped under her dress and over the swell of her ass, pushing away the fabric and leaving her bare in the moonlight. She stepped out of the dress as it pooled onto the ground and kicked it away, letting Lambert’s eyes dance over her naked form. She was fully aware that she didn’t look precisely human while nude, but she had been around long enough to not care, and to know that a great many humans didn’t care either.

“I’m sure you already know this,” Lambert breathed, dragging his fingers lightly up the outside of her thigh, “but you really are beautiful.”

Essi felt herself blush as she pulled him down for another kiss, her hands working at the laces of his codpiece and pushing it aside, reaching in and wrapping herself around the weeping cock hidden away. She smirked against his lips when he bucked into her hand. “You’re not so bad yourself, especially like this.”

Lambert smirked right back at her as he wrapped his arms around her waist and led her to lay in the grass, letting her golden hair splay around her head like spilled starlight. He kicked away his pants and boots and kneeled down by her knees. “I’ve never really had anyone like...this. Tell me what feels good?”

Essi nodded. “You’re doing well already. Not many ask my preference.”

“Well, then they’re assholes.”

“I won’t argue that. Slip your fingers into my slit, feel around. Tell me what you find.”

Lambert quirked his brow with a roguish grin. “So mysterious. I’m always excited about research…”

He slipped his fingers down into the warm embrace between her thighs, finding...something that might remind him of a small cock without much use of his imagination. But it was ribbed along the base and came to a finer point rather than the bulbous head he was so familiar with. As he parted her slit, it sprung free and bounced up to rest by the crook of her hip, clearly rigid with blood in the way that he might also expect. What he didn’t expect was the color. The slick, smooth skin was a deep navy blue, which transitioned to the color of the blushed corals that grew along the shoreline.

Lambert tilted his head and dragged his fingers down the stiff line of Essi’s length, watching as her back arched and she let out a strangled gasp. “Well,” he smiled, “I have found something that seems to feel very nice indeed. And quite lovely to look at. What do you call it?”

Essi chuckled as she ran her fingers through her hair. “Well...I think that the technical term is ‘anchor,’ though I don’t think that’s terribly sexy. I usually just call it a shaft and move on with my life.”

“And, ah, have I been treating it properly?”

Essi dragged her fingers down over her chest, lightly rubbing her nipples as Lambert almost started to fucking drool. “You’re on the right track. Now, you can gently wrap your hand around it and stroke up and down, almost like your own. Though I don’t much care for the squeezing. Touch me like you’d touch a glass with a bolt of lightning contained inside. It’s very powerful, sturdy. But it can shatter with the smallest push too far.”

Lambert nodded with a wink, “Sounds like something I’ve handled successfully before.” With that he took her gingerly in hand, feeling the smooth weight of it in his palm. It was slipperier than he was used to, which eased its movement in his loose fist. He didn’t have to go far, it fit almost perfectly in his hand with the exception of the coral-pink tip which seemed to be the most sensitive area. He worked slowly, carefully, despite the voice in his head screaming for him to get on with it. He wasn’t an idiot. There was a right and a wrong way to do this, and the wrong way meant a good time had by no one.

Essi felt a pleasant shock rumble up through her stomach and across her chest, her hips following Lambert’s loose grip as her breathing became deeper and more drawn out. “Ah, ah just like that. You’re a natural-”

“Can I taste you?” Lambert interrupted her, his eyes almost black with how dilated his pupils were. He could smell her arousal, that thick heady scent swirling straight down to his cock and fucking Gods he just really wanted to use his mouth on her-

Essi chuckled breathily, “Alright, yes! Again, just be gentl-nnngg…”

Lambert felt his cheeks flush when he realized that he had actually been speaking aloud, but he hid himself by dragging the flat of his tongue slowly up the line of her shaft. He could feel the ridges catching before smoothing out towards the tip, which he only barely lapped at when he felt her thighs tense around his head. Gods, she tasted like a gulpful of air on the purest beach.

After a few successful laps at her shaft, Lambert tilted his head, adjusted his angle, and carefully took her entire length into the wet heat of his mouth. Essi gasped and keened loudly over the cliffs, and Lambert wagered no one else had bothered to think of doing that. Numbskulls didn’t know what they were missing. He felt cool fingers weave into his hair as he worked, rubbing the textured base with his thumb and forefinger, which prompted a guttural groan from above him.

“F-fuck, al-” Essi swallowed thickly, willing herself to see this out. Gods-be-damned, he was good. “Alright. T-take your fingers and go back a bit, I ne-fuck I need something inside of me please.”

Lambert’s fingers stopped their back and forth drag around Essi’s shaft and dropped lower, sliding between slick lips and fitting comfortably into an opening that fluttered around the intrusion, drenching his hand with a fresh wave of arousal. It was quite the familiar spot for Lambert to find himself in, though it was...unexpected, what with her shaft having held the forefront of his attention so far.

He pulled away from her shaft long enough to make sure he knew what he was working with, “H-how...Essi, is this what I think it is?” Lambert’s voice was incredulous, almost sounding as if he had never known anything that had made him quite this happy.

“Essentially, yes.”

“Fuck, you’re incredible.”

Essi smiled, that oddly sharp canine tooth glinting under the moon, “All sirens are either Alphas or Omegas or Betas, and have the corresponding equivalent anatomy. With our own little twist, of course. I would be considered an Omega, if I were a full-blooded siren, but being half-human, I have my own unique variations. You should be more or less familiar with this territory. Unless I’m much mistaken.”

Lambert sighed happily. “Gods, woman. You are just a whole bunch of extra fun, aren’t you?”

He shuffled around for a moment, bracing himself on his knees and elbows with his head level with her core. Essi felt the warm fan of his breath over her before he slowly pushed two fingers inside of her, moving back and forth at a languid pace while his other hand resumed its gentle exploration of her shaft. “Is it extra sensitive down here too, or can I give you a little more?”

Essi shook her head as she felt Lambert’s tongue lap at the base of her length, teasing the ridges back and forth. “No more than typical I’d say, at least for what experiences with human women I’ve had. Th-the tip is the most sensitive, so you, uh...you can go for it. Just not too fast all at once, alright?”

Lambert nodded and carefully nosed down the line of her shaft and down to her entrance. His hand still moved loosely over the base while he licked into her core, broad strokes matching the pace of his hands around her and inside of her. Essi looked down and watched him with an odd expression. His eyes were closed and the high planes of his cheeks were flushed pink as the dark blue skin of her shaft bumped against his forehead with every stroke of his fist and tongue.

Meanwhile, Lambert was having a religious experience in the liminal space nestled between Essi’s thighs. Time didn’t exist outside of that spot, and for all he knew the world could’ve ceased turning and was hurtling towards oblivion. And if it were?

Well, he really didn’t give a shit.

His own cock was achingly hard, leaking pearly strings onto the grass between his knees. Lambert relished every twitch of Essi’s thighs around his head as he pushed his tongue into the warm embrace of her slit. He moaned from deep in his chest, his nose bumping against the ridges on Essi’s shaft while he still moved his hand around her.

Essi gasped and writhed as Lambert very gently ran his thumb over her extra-sensitive tip, not lingering or pushing her too far, just the barest shock of intensity before resuming his gentle exploration. Her hands flew to tangle into his hair and she could feel his smirk as he pressed his lips in soft kisses to the insides of her thighs. His chest rumbled with a hum as he slipped his fingers from her core and shoved them into his mouth, licking them clean.

“W-” she breathed, feeling the golden flames of his eyes trail over her skin, “why’d you stop?”

Lambert braced his hands on the ground and pushed himself up, the scruff on his chin shining with her arousal and the endearing smile on his lips. “Just don’t want this to be over before it starts. C...can I fuck you?”

Essi smiled and ran her hands over Lambert’s stomach, through the dark coarse hairs that led down to his cock jutting just next to her own hard shaft. “Yes,” she smiled, her blue eyes boring into his, “but not like this.”

She gently pushed Lambert’s shoulders back and sat up with him, slotting their lips together briefly before she flipped herself around onto her hands and knees.

Lambert groaned, running his hands up the back of her thighs and giving the soft rounds of her bum a squeeze. He slid his finger down to the slickness between her thighs. “Oh, fuck me sideways, woman.”

His hands were reverent, skirting tracks of stardust along her spine and down over the gentle swells of her hips. Essi arched her back and shot a devilish smirk back over her shoulder, waving her ass back and forth enticingly. “Come on then,” she said with a glint in her eyes, “be good to me.”

Oh, and if that didn’t go right the fuck to Lambert’s cock. He scooted forward on his knees and took himself in hand, running the head of his length through her slick folds a few times, catching on her entrance. He felt a queer growl reverberate through her skin and he chuckled. “Alright, alright. Patience, you.”

He pushed in slowly, feeling her envelope him in the most indulgent heat he had ever had the great grace to know. Lambert dug his fingertips into the meat of Essi’s ass, while Essi’s nails dragged tracks along the soft grass pillowed beneath her. As his hips blissfully met the backs of Essi’s thighs, Lambert let out a shaky breath in an effort to keep his mind clear in the hazy mist of Essi’s pleasure.

“You ah-” Lambert sighed as her walls fluttered welcomingly around him, “you alright?”

Essi reached back, grasping onto one of Lambert’s on her hip. “Very,” she breathed, her chest heaving and her cunt clenching and flexing around Lambert. “Now if you would kindly move, it would be greatly appreciated.”

“You know,” Lambert said as he slowly shifted his hips back before rolling back in, looking down at her shiny lips trying desperately to keep him buried within her, “you’re quite the spinstrel. You-nnng, you should be a bard…”

Essi chuckled lightly. “A half-siren bard with enchanted songs? A cliche if ever there was one.”

“Just a thought, trying to keep myself from finishing before we really get anywhere,” Lambert grunted, his hips picking up just a bit more speed. Essi planted her hands firmy back on the ground and met him thrust for thrust, the claps of their skin echoing back from the cliffs.

Both of them were being swept out to sea by their pleasure, rushing waves slamming back and forth between them. Lambert’s eyes flitted over every inch of Essi before him, from the soft waves of her golden hair that bounced with each snap of his hips, down the delicate slope of her back arching into him, the curly fuzz that surrounded her slit and brushed against him as he buried himself inside of her.

Lambert slowed himself, grinding his hips up and down. Essi grit her teeth and keened quietly, pushing herself back in an effort to encourage Lambert’s pace.

“C-can I flip you over?” Lambert huffed, tracking his hands over Essi’s hips. “I know it’ll be a lot, and if you don’t like it, we can go back to this. But...I think you might enjoy it-”

Essi gasped as Lambert’s cock just barely brushed against the tender bundle of nerves nestled deep within her. She nodded frantically, “Y-yes, we can-fuck, please Lambert…”

Lambert looked down, his eyes locked on the sweet blushed lips of Essi’s cunt as he dragged himself from her embrace. He groaned as he fell from her, thin tendrils of her slick still attempting valiantly to tie them back together. Essi slid down, slinking and twisting onto her back. Her shaft lay up on the mound of soft curls at the base, shining with her arousal as Lambert crawled atop her.

He leaned down, resting their foreheads together and searching those far-too-deep eyes. He could smell her lust dripping from her skin, but could see just a hint of worry hidden in her glances. “Hey,” Lambert whispered, brushing their lips together as he spoke, “like I said. You don’t like it, say the word and we stop. No questions asked.”

Essi took a deep breath and nodded, swallowing thickly. “I promise, I want this. So fucking much. It’s just...going to be a lot. I don’t want to push too far...but I also kind of want to push too far, if that makes sense.”

Lambert pressed his lips softly along the line of her jaw and down into the hollow of her neck. “It absolutely does. But not too far, not tonight. Maybe, if we see our paths cross again, we can have some fun with that.”

Essi waggled her eyebrows and gently rolled her hips, gasping when the base of her shaft rutted against Lambert’s cock. “Please, fuck me.”

“It would be my pleasure,” Lambert hummed as he lined himself up in her slit beneath her shaft, pushing back into her warm embrace with a growl that tore through his chest. The cool air on his back was shocked in great contrast with Essi’s body, hot and wet and so fucking tight.

Lambert gave a few good thrusts until he was buried deep within her, and fuck if he didn’t want to stay there until the world stopped turning. He leaned down, wrapping his arms underneath Essi’s back and letting his hands grip onto the backs of her shoulders. He felt her walls flutter valiantly around him and he groaned into her mouth.

Essi was shocked with just how much she felt Lambert. In her, on her, around her. Everywhere. He was fucking her slowly, intensely. Deeply. He wasn’t even really thrusting anymore, just grinding up into her and the coarse hairs on his stomach leading down to his groin brushed against her shaft every. Fucking. Time. She was almost delirious with the intensity, but instead of wanting to dance away from the ache, she found herself with the low burn of craving that had her fingers itching for every ounce of Lambert that she could reach.

Essi dug her nails into the short strands of his hair, mussing it before smoothing her hands down his neck and over his shoulders. Lambert shuddered over her, beads of sweat collecting at his temples as he nipped at her chin. Through the haze of her building climax, Essi only barely had the wherewithal to rub her thumbs over his nipples in time with the rolls of his hips.

And sweet fucking Gods above that was almost enough to do Lambert in. Just barely hanging on by a thread, he persists, determined to see Essi through to a satisfying finish. He felt her shaft pressing into the cushion of his stomach, the ridges along the underside sliding along the tender space of skin nestled right above his cock. “F-fuck,” he moans, tasting his own arousal on her lips, “w..what do you need? I’m so close, I-I need you to-”

“T-touch me,” Essi whispered, her eyes fluttering shut as another wave arousal threatened to send her over, so close but not quite enough. “The t-tip, not a lot, jus-aaaahhhhhhh-”

Lambert reached between their bodies, lightly glancing his fingers in gentle strokes over the blushed tip of her shaft. Her back arched high and he could taste her tears of overstimulation as the wave of climax finally, blissfully overtook her.

And...well. That was an experience that Lambert found himself woefully underprepared for. Sure, he was familiar with the sensation of a fluttering cunt flexing around his cock. But holy fucking shit was the rest of this uncharted territory.

Essi’s shaft spurted out long streaks of spend, much thinner and wetter than he expected. It actually reminded him of a woman he had been with years ago who let out a long release of liquid when he hit a certain angle over and over again inside of her and drenched the both of them in her slick. The same happened with Essi as she spent long and hard, spurts of her arousal wetting the downy hairs on Lambert’s chest and pooling in the soft valley between her breasts.

Lambert’s hips faltered and he ground himself once, twice, thrice more before pulling himself out and stripping his cock, frantically letting his own orgasm white out his senses. He spent pearly white ropes over her shaft and her stomach, letting it drip down into the petals of her cunt.

His chest heaved as he felt his senses poke and prod at his climax-squishy brain. He could feel Essi’s hands smoothing down his arms and up to cup his face, her lips pressing soft kisses across his cheeks and into his slack mouth.

It was the scent of their spends mixing atop Essi’s skin that brought Lambert back to the present, Essi’s saltier and with a sweeter musk than he would think. He leaned down and ran his tongue between her breasts, his hands cupping the tender mounds while he tasted her pleasure. Her spend was clear with a light blue-grey tinge, and fuck it was addicting. She ran her fingers through his hair as he mouthed at her, moving down her stomach and over the hairs at the peak of her core. Her shaft had softened and slid itself back away, but she still glistened beneath the moonlight with the evidence of their climaxes.

Lambert sat up, bracing his hands on either side of Essi’s hips. “Well,” he smirked, but Essi could see a soft twinkle in his eyes, “did I do a well enough job to earn an encore?”

Essi laughed lightly, “I’d say yes, with certainty. Though, not for quite a while. I think you may have ruined me for taking any lovers in the near future. Not that I’m complaining, mind you.”

Lambert dipped his head and captured her lips, letting their tastes mingle on their tongues. “Shall I come find you in Skellige?”

Essi hummed, “If you like. I shall not turn you away should you find me.”

“And if you find me first?”

Essi pushed his shoulders back, shifting and rising to meet him on her knees. “Then I shall call for you, just as I did here. Just follow my song.”

[pressedinthepages]

Decembert Day 4 - Shelter

@continentcakeshop thanks as always for the encouragement <3

Rating: T

Relationship: Lambert/Essi

Content Tags: TW3 Lambert, modern au, fluff, yearning

Summary: Finding himself at her doorstep, Lambert seeks shelter with Essi for the night.

Lambert shivered in the cool winter air as little flurries of snow floated to the ground around him. He stood at the stoop of the familiar apartment, though he had yet to knock or ring the doorbell. He stood there, freezing his balls off, because he couldn’t make himself seem like a bother all of the sudden.

It was quiet, though Lambert could hear sirens in the distance ringing through the night. He sighed and rubbed his hands together, trying to warm them before he pressed the little buzzer next to the door.

His keys jingled in his pocket as he bounced lightly from foot to foot, waiting for the door to open. A set of footsteps bounded softly down the stairs inside before the door unlatched and swung open, revealing a young woman with long, wavy blond hair that hung over one of her bright blue eyes.

“Lambert?” Essi quirked her brow, tying her fuzzy dressing gown around her waist. “It’s the middle of the night.”

“Yeah,” Lambert sighed, running his hand back through his hair sheepishly. “I locked myself out of my apartment. I was wondering if I might could…stay here tonight?”

Essi smiled softly. “Lambert. You don’t have to lie to me. I can see your key sticking out of your pocket.”

He was lucky for the chilly wind, for he might have been able to blame the flush of his cheeks on it. “I…well, you know, I just-“

Essi laughed, bright and warm and straight to the soft spot in Lambert’s stomach. “Shut up. Come on, get inside before you catch cold. We can put on a movie…”

Lambert shuffled in and kicked the snow from his boots before leaving them at the door as Essi locked back up. He instantly felt warmer, though not necessarily from the heat inside her apartment. No, it radiated from her, a sweet sear that cut through Lambert’s core and kept him warm on the coldest nights.

So there he stayed.

[sometimesiwrite]

The Way It Is

Prompt: Fake Dating

Pairing: Lambert & Essi Other Characters: Julian (Jaskier), Eskel/Geralt

Rating: Teen Content Warnings: No Archive Warnings; platonic/queerplatonic dynamics; pressure to engage sexually; coarse language; alcohol/intoxication; modern AU.

Summary: When Essi and Lambert are setup on a blind date, they don’t expect to get along as well as they do. However, when they decide to keep their relationship platonic and non-romantic, they realize they might face some uncomfortable pressure. For the sake of simplicity, they decide to tell people they’re dating, but is it sustainable? 

@witcher-rarepair-summer-bingo​

Essi fidgeted with the bent corner of her cafe menu, looking around at the various styles of local artworks hanging on the walls. She was early by about ten minutes, but that didn’t stop her from checking the pearlescent dial of her watch every thirty seconds. Finally, the bell above the door tinkled and a man walked in. Essi could tell from the way he was looking around that he was there to meet someone—her. The only other people sitting alone in the cafe were working on laptops and tablets; no one else waiting for a date. And this man was most certainly looking for one. 

He was handsome in a ruffled sort of way, though he’d clearly put in a bit of effort. His black casual dress shirt and slim light-wash jeans fit his lean frame impeccably, and a subtle quantity of mousse was clearly doing its best to tame his short, scruffy brown hair. Even his bristly beard appeared to have been trimmed recently. Though there was nothing particularly remarkable about his clothing, there was something striking about the way he carried himself, a devil-may-care sort of presence that Essi appreciated. For a blind date, she thought, it certainly could be worse. Allegedly, they knew each other, at least based on his abruptly out-of-the-blue text, and the closer she looked, the more her memory of him crystalized. 

A loud ping! emitted from Essi’s phone and the man looked up from his own cellular device, clearly having just texted. 

“Uh, Essi? Essi Daven, right?” He took a step towards her and leaned in, pointing to his phone screen. 

“Yes,” Essi stood to shake his hand, “hi.”

“Nice to see you again. Lambert.”

They sat down awkwardly, both struggling to find the will for smalltalk. 

“So…” Lambert had become keenly interested in a black-and-white digital photograph behind Essi’s shoulder.

“Listen,” Essi could feel the words start to tumble out of her mouth, and it was too late to do anything about it. Lambert raised an eyebrow,  “I don’t really know how to say this, so I’m just going to be honest and probably regret it later: I don’t really do this. Dating. I find it strange and uncomfortable and if I’m perfectly honest I think I’d rather die.” She didn’t cringe apologetically, which would have been the expected behaviour to accompany an outpouring of disinterest. Instead she stared at him, wide-eyed, lips slightly pursed as a muscle in her neck twitched, waiting for his response.

Lambert laughed. Genuinely laughed—a joyful release of tension and dread, “Oh, thank Fuck!” Essi blinked in pleasant surprise and watched as Lambert began to relax.

“Excuse me?” Her startlingly blue eyes widened in amusement. 

“No, no, I just mean—I would absolutely and one-hundred percent, without a doubt, rather die in a hole than date,” Lambert slotted the edge of the menu under his fingernails and let his eyes wander a little more freely around the cafe. 

“So then… why?” 

Hm. Direct, frank, amusing lack of filter… the memories were starting to come back from what limited, heavily inebriated, time they’d spent together.

There was something about the straightforwardness of this endearingly odd woman that made Lambert feel infinitely more comfortable. Usually, any kind of interaction with the potential of building mutual interest made him feel like he was playing a game he didn’t know the rules to. The signals, the code words that never meant what they said: having sex on the first date means you’re a slut; not having sex on the third date means you’re a prude; grabbing coffee means this; having dinner means that; if they your arm but don’t invite you up, it means that they’re actually a KGB operative and need to give you the launch codes for a super secret missile...

Fuck that, we have words for a reason. Say what you mean and don’t waste my time. For that reason alone, Essi was already scoring quite well in Lambert’s books. 

He shrugged, “You somehow remembered me from the KM Christmas party almost six months ago, and still asked for my number. I figure that at least deserves a coffee and a conversation.”

Essi was bewildered, “I didn’t ask for your number, you texted me.”

Lambert shook his head, “Impossible. No offense, but I absolutely guarantee you I did not.” He produced their short text exchange and scrolled to the top of their conversation: 

Hi, is this Lambert? From the KM Christmas party? 

You might not remember me, we got talking about 

the political situation in Kashmir after about…

Too many drinks. Eeep! 

Anyway, I’d love to get a coffee sometime, if 

you’re interested. 

Sorry, this is Essi Daven. 

You called me Goldilocks at one point and 

seemed amused XD 

Hope you’re well! 

Essi snatched Lambert’s phone, shocked and slightly outraged as she reached for her own device, opening her thread with Lambert. The text at the top was not from her, but from the man across from her: 

Yeah, hi, this is 

Lambert-from-the-KM-Christmas-party. 

As it happens, I remember you and our 

conversation quite well. Not many folks 

happily get into drunken political discussions

You know what, I wouldn’t mind grabbing a 

coffee. 

Let me know if you’re free in the next couple 

weeks! 

Lambert gestured emphatically at Essi’s phone screen, “In what world is this an acceptable way to ask someone out?! I wouldn’t have said yes to that!”

“I don’t know,” Essi fired back, “It was straightforward! I found it charming, okay? Is that a crime?”

“No, but I have some serious concerns about your taste in men.”

“Like you’re in such a fine position to judge after the hollow, paltry invitation you accepted—which I absolutely did not write, by the way. I want to make that perfectly clear.”

“Alright, alright, cool your jets, we’ve got bigger fish to fry.” Lambert narrowed his eyes as he passed Essi’s phone back to her, “You didn't fire the first shot, so who texted me from your phone and cleared the history?”

Essi nibbled the inside of her cheek, “I can think of a few.”

“Okay, next question,” Lambert pocketed his phone, “who added you to my contacts before you texted. Because we did not exchange numbers six months ago, but your name was already there when I received it.”

Essi shrugged, “Who has access to your phone?”

“I dunno. Really just Eskel and Geralt and neither of them would—”

“Geralt.”

“Why him?”

Essi’s bright blue eyes turned steely and murderous, “Julian… They’re working together.”

“Wait, wait, wait. Are you telling me that Geralt the-last-thing-I-need Rivia and Julian Alfred these-aren't-my-pants Pankratz think we're so helplessly undateable that they decided to secretly set us up?” 

“Eskel doesn’t know me that well; he wouldn’t try to set you up with someone he hadn’t vetted. Who did you talk to first when you got that text from me?”

Lambert’s eyes widened, “Holy shit, they’re working together.”

Essi nodded, a flood of embarrassment warming her cheeks. “Sorry to waste your time. You’re very nice but, um, I should just…” she got up to leave.

“Wh-hey, hold up. I mean, if you wanna go, go, that's fine, but there's something you might want to know first.”

Essi tossed her yellow bangs out of her eyes, “Oh? What's that?”

“This,” Lambert produced an Amex credit card from his breast pocket, “is Geralt's.” The cheeky glint in his eyes was a very convincing argument.

“Fine then. Coffee and a conversation.” 

The coffee was hot and decent, and the conversation meandered through the usual topics of music, movies, and television, but also dipped into deeper waters as they grew more comfortable with each other’s company. Of course, it didn’t hurt that neither of them had any stakes in the outcome of this “date”. It made it easier to be frank and open, which in turn led to them quickly enjoying their time together. So much so that coffee turned into lunch, which turned into a long walk in the pleasant weather, which finally landed them outside Essi’s apartment, just around dinner time. 

“I have to say, this was actually a pleasant encounter,” she said, turning to face him with a characteristic toss of her bangs. 

“Yeah, who’d’ve thought two people forced together by meddling friends would actually find it enjoyable?” 

“In light of that,” Essi squared her shoulders and found Lambert’s hazel-brown eyes, “I think it’s fair to say I want to see you again.”

He cringed regretfully and scratched the back of his head, “Ahh, yeah, so… I don’t know if that’s really--”

“Oh, relax,” Essi smirked with a casual touch to Lambert’s forearm. “I don't mean like that. I just mean--you're interesting and fun and, well I don't have many close friends and I feel like we connected well today.”

“Well…”

“I'll make it even simpler: I absolutely, one-hundred percent, am not interested in dating you.”

“Easy there, you know I love it when people get all straightforward with me.” 

“I mean it, I just want to be friends,” she toyed back, trying her best to look sultry. It kind of worked.

Lambert bit his lower lip in mock arousal, “Mmm, oh yeah...”

She swayed her shoulders forward and back, doing her best to emulate the seductive actresses and models of the 1950s, “I want to Netflix and chill with a documentary about Soviet propaganda.”

Her last comment prompted a playfully stern look from her companion, “Careful now, you’re wading into actual turn-on territory.” 

“You're such a weirdo,” Essi chuckled, giving him an endeared shove. “Seriously, though, would you like to do this again? Friends?” 

He nodded sincerely, “Yeah, I think I'd really like that. Just one problem, though.”

“If we claim not to be interested in each other but keep hanging out we’ll never hear the end of it?” 

“Bingo.” 

Essi hummed thoughtfully and nibbled the inside of her bottom lip, “Well… we could always… pretend?” 

***

“Sounds like you two are hitting it off. I’m glad. I know Essi’s been feeling a little isolated between work and being new to the city.” Geralt closed the fridge with his foot and headed towards the sofa, popcorn in one hand, three beers in the other. “I’ll take my card back, by the way.” 

Lambert reluctantly handed the Amex back in exchange for a beer and perched on the arm of the sofa. “She’s really something. We’re, uh—yeah, hitting it off is a good word.”

And hitting it off, they were. The last ten days since their first “date” had been more enjoyable than all the dates he’d had in the last year combined. Essi was a fantastic companion: sharp, witty, kind, took no bullshit… They had done absolutely nothing but hang out, and no one had pried them for many details about the nature of their relationship. As far as their friend group was concerned, they were simply dating in the way that most adults dated. This also meant more time to themselves without unwanted interruptions (namely Julian barging in with his spare key to gossip about whatever fires were currently alight on twitter). The first night Lambert had been over, it took Julian all of five minutes to “grab something from the fridge” before parting with a knowing wink. 

To her credit and imagination, Essi had expertly fielded her cousin’s initial barrage of questions when she first announced their “involvement.” It wasn’t that she didn’t like her cousin, Essi adored Julian, but she was also the first to admit that the man had no boundaries. What he lacked in that arena, he certainly made up for with opinions, which he was always more than happy to bestow on his younger cousin—usually dating advice, almost always unsolicited. Lambert had a much easier time convincing his side that he and Essi were taking it easy to see where things went. Between Eskel being a consummate gentleman and Geralt having his own Delicate Sensibilities, neither of them had demanded any details. 

“As long as you’re both happy and everything’s healthy, that’s all that matters,” Geralt’s partner reiterated, reaching into the bowl on Geralt’s lap. 

“Jesus, Eskel, you sound like my Nonna.”

“That's no way to talk to your father,” Geralt smirked into his hand of popcorn

“You're no better,” Lambert took a swig from his beer, lips popping as he lowered the bottle. “I swear, you've turned into a couple of mother hens since you two got together. Quit fussing and watch the game.” 

Geralt put his arm around Eskel’s shoulders, “We have gotten a little soft haven’t we?”

Eskel huffed out a laugh, “Probably. Hey, Lambert, don't fuck it up or I'll kick your ass into next week.” 

“Thank you. See? Was that so hard?” 

“Eh,” Eskel shrugged, helping himself to another handful of popcorn, “I stand by my original statement. Geralt agrees.” 

“It's true,” he said between mouthfuls. “Essi’s a good woman. Smart, talented, kind, attractive.” 

Eskel cleared his throat.

“Eskel, she is, it's just a statement of fact it doesn't mean that she doesn’t have other…”

“I know it doesn't but I still think you could bear to be a little more…”

“Funny thing,” Lambert interrupted, “I still can’t figure out how this smart, talented, kind, attractive woman’s number programmed itself into my phone. Because I may have been drunk the night we first met, but I have never in my life forgotten a successful number grab. Fess up, fellas. Who was it?”

Eskel’s eyes widened, “Geralt, you didn’t.”  

“I… may have… helped Julian gain access to Lambert’s phone.”

“Unbelievable. The betrayal,” Lambert shook his head, eyes still on the game. “If only there was some way to square things up…”

“You charged everything to my company card, didn’t you?”

“First two dates and a fresh pair of pants. Thanks, bud.” Geralt accepted a pat on the back as Eskel began gently but sternly berating him.

Lambert shook his head, smirking as he took another swig of beer, leaving the two lovebirds to bicker amongst themselves. His hip pocket buzzed and he checked his phone: Essi. 

Next Wednesday? Pizza and a movie?  Still can't believe you haven't seen  Ocean’s Eleven. 

Yeah, okay, fine. Jeez :P 7:30 my place? I'll provide beverages. 

If by ‘beverages’ you mean watery beer…

Fuck off, I'll get the good stuff. Unless  you prefer Arbor Mist or some shit. 

*gasps* I am offended! (but also it's delicious)

*sigh* do you want me to get you some?

*turtles into hoodie* ...peach or cherry pls? 

Haha okay, fine, I'll get a bottle. Can't promise  I won't judge you forever, though ;) 

It's okay, I deserve it.  g2g, see you tomorrow! xox 

***

Lambert groaned contentedly, massaging his stomach as he sprawled back on his aging brown sofa, long legs resting habitually on the coffee table. The now-empty pizza box lay abandoned on the far edge, accompanied by four empty beer bottles, and a nearly-empty, unfavourably warm Peach Arbor Mist. The toilet flushed and Essi emerged. Her dark gold hair had long ago been pulled into a messy bun, but her indigo skinny jeans had been replaced by soft-looking grey leggings. 

Lambert shook his head in amusement as she settled back next to him on the couch, "I still can't believe you brought your own lounge pants"

"That's because I'm a genius," she quipped, crossing her legs and adjusting the height of her waistband. "Besides, when else will I have the opportunity to actually be comfortable during a date?" 

"You took your bra off, too, didn't you?" Lambert asked without missing a beat, eyes never leaving the screen. 

"Yup!" Essi confirmed, her sparkling blue eyes glinting with joy as she raised her glass to her lips.

The movie continued as the new friends settled into comfortable silence, their food-drowsy, alcohol-fuzzy states lulling them into a new level of comfortability around each other. Legs fell asleep, positions were adjusted, and shoulders leaned on as the two sought maximum comfort for minimum effort. Soon, an arm was around Essi's shoulder as she settled her cheek on a comfortable spot on Lambert's chest. 

"You good?" Lambert asked, only half-irritated at her seemingly endless search for the perfect angle. 

"I'm sorry, I thought I'd found a good spot, but..." A few more adjustments of her head and Lambert couldn't take it anymore. 

"Jesus, woman, here. Get up for a sec."

Essi sat up as Lambert rearranged himself into a sort of semi-recline with one foot on the floor so his other leg could make room for the tiny pain-in-the-ass that was taking up the rest of the couch space. At his invitation, she wriggled up to the crook of his arm and quickly settled in. Lambert hadn't really thought about what they were doing. Not when Essi had harmlessly leaned against his arm; not when their weight settled into each other; not when Lambert had put his arm around her; not even as he was rearranging to get to where they were now. It had all just... happened. Now, though, with Essi lying still, Lambert felt the weight and warmth of her body shifting gently against his, and it dawned on him that this had the potential to be, well, weird.

But the strange thing was, it didn't feel weird. He'd fucking cuddled before, but there was always a sense of holding back, a tension in his body, being on the lookout for signals from the other person to move onto the Next Step. But now, he actually felt comfortable. There wasn't anything that was supposed to happen after this. Nobody was asking anything of him, no one sending signals he could pick up on but never read properly, no sinking feelings of dread as the other person moved in for a kiss that always felt too soon. Essi was just there, breathing, content. And Lambert was relaxed.

The woman half-on top of him gave a twitch as the credits started to roll, and Lambert let out a private laugh, "Hey, Sleeping Beauty, show's over." 

Essi inhaled heavily through her nose and lifted herself up, "Hmmm?" 

"Movie's over." 

"Did I fall asleep? I'm sorry!" she sat and rubbed her eyes, taking a sip of water to rinse the stale taste from her mouth. 

"Eh, only a little." Lambert exited Netflix and tossed the remote back on to the table. "Thought you might wanna start heading home before it gets too late." 

Essi nodded in response as she grabbed the pizza box and brought it to the kitchen trash, leaving Lambert to bring the empties. 

"You going to finish this atrocity of a beverage?" Lambert waggled the near-empty wine bottle at Essi as he passed on his way to the sink. She merely scowled and shook her head, letting him pour it down the drain 'where it belonged anyway'.

Essi gathered her things and met Lambert by his front door, checking her pockets for her phone and keys one last time before putting her shoes on. 

"You okay to walk? Want me to come with?" 

It was only 10:30 on a weeknight, and she appreciated the gesture all the same, but it was fine to walk. "Thanks, though. And thank you for tonight. I really needed to get out of the house. I hope, um..." 

She trailed off, not sure how to ask. She didn't have the same physical boundaries that most others seemed to have. She was affectionate—often overly so, and it had led to more than a few misunderstandings in the past. She didn't want Lambert to feel as though she had ulterior motives when the simple fact of the matter was that she hadn't really been thinking. Between the instant relief of not actually being on a date and Lambert's easy manner all evening, she'd forgotten that most friendships didn’t generally involve that much physical contact. Would Lambert be confused now? Thinking they were onto something more than friendship? Had he been wanting more? Had she pushed past a point of no return and doomed their friendship?

She inhaled, "Were you comfortable tonight?" 

For a split second, Lambert flailed, wondering whether he’d made her uncomfortable. Fuck, she'd seemed comfortable, if anything it felt like he’d been following her lead but maybe...

"I—yeah. That was, I enjoyed that. Were... were you not—?" 

Essi smiled and Lambert relaxed again, "No, I was. I wanted to ask in case, that's all. Boundaries and all that. I'll text you when I'm home." 

Lambert opened the door and waved her off toward the elevator, "'Kay. 'Night!" 

The door clicked shut. 

Okay, alright. Fine. Did they cuddle? Yes. Did he enjoy it? Fuck yes. He absolutely didn’t care what anyone might think about how he chose to enjoy his time with other people. However, this didn’t stop him from acknowledging that he was in uncharted friendship territory. More than anything, he was worried about how Essi really felt. Of course, she had no reason not to be honest with him. But the last thing he wanted to do was play fast and loose with someone’s emotions, especially not a friend, and definitely not one as close as Essi. Time would tell. As Lambert’s head hit the pillow, the memory of her warmth and weight settled over him again, and he slept soundly for the first time in months.

***

“Yes Poppet, but have you slept together yet? Honestly, you’ve been dating for almost three weeks now, what could you possibly be waiting for?” 

Oh, I don’t know, hell to freeze over? You to mind your own business? Whichever comes first… 

“I mean, you clearly adore one another, I’ve never seen you happier. What’s there to lose?’”

Essi scoffed. 

Julian placed his hands on her shoulders, “I know it’s been a while for you, but I think you can afford to let yourself go a little, have some fun, hm? Besides, it’s better to find out sooner rather than later if you’re sexually incompatible.”

She took a deep breath, “That’s a very good point, Julian, I’ll think about that.” The dating act was starting to wear a little thin, but it was worth not having to explain to anyone that they weren’t doing exactly what it looked like they were doing. 

Julian took time to give his cousin a scrutinizing look, “Well, by the look of things it won’t be long anyway. If you spend all of your time together as tangled up as you were the other night when I came over, it’ll happen sooner rather than later. Just trust your gut, and when in doubt, a little hint never goes awry.”

Needless to say, Essi more or less ignored her cousin’s advice.

As the weeks stretched on, it became evident that they were quickly becoming what most people would consider to be more than friends. The first time they pulled the covers back and climbed into bed, each on their half of the mattress, they were aware that yet another boundary of friendship had been pushed a little farther into the grey zone. But, they woke up the next morning feeling happy, content, and refreshed, and surely there was nothing wrong with two people sharing a comfortable bed. Essi had woken up with crust in her eyes and her nightgown bunched around her waist. Lambert had woken up with morning wood and his hair a mess. Neither of them cared. People wake up in the morning, big deal. 

Still, it didn’t stop the questioning that oscillated in the background of Lambert’s mind. Was he unknowingly leading Essi on by allowing her so much closeness without a clearly defined relationship? She’d made her own disinterest clear enough on their first “date”,  but feelings change over time. What she’d told him three weeks ago might not be true anymore… 

And then there was that soft warm tingle in the middle of his chest every time she lay her head in his lap, every time he ran his fingers through her hair. He knew he wasn't in love. Not that he was an expert, but what was all that "when you know, you know" bullshit if he couldn’t trust his own feelings? He loved her, sure, but more like a... not a sister, that would be weird. He didn't know what like. Whatever. Fuck it. Eskel had said it best three weeks ago: “As long as you're happy and everything’s healthy, that’s all that matters.” Yeah, sure. We’ll stick with that.

As far as Lambert and Essi were concerned, it was what it was, and whatever it was was working… wasn’t it?

***

"Fuckin' finally!" 

The door to Essi's apartment clicked closed as the tenant wilted against it, emitting an exhausted groan, "Two. Hours. It took me two hours to get home!" She toed off her penny loafers and abandoned her purse and jacket in a pile by the front door, ignoring the hook three inches to her left. She flopped heavily onto her living room carpet. 

"I see you found my spare key," she added, not at all surprised that Lambert had managed to let himself in. 

"Yeah, you should probably put that in a less obvious spot," he answered, crossing to the door to hang her things up. "So, I see it's a lying on the floor kind of evening. Can I interest you in a drink to start? Vodka pairs well with the general vibe of Done-With-This-Shit, or we also have tequila if you feel like shouting out the window after a couple shots. Alternatively, there's gin if you want to cry later." 

Essi smiled with her eyes closed, feeling her body slowly relaxing into the spongy throw rug underneath her, "You know me so well." 

"Vodka?" 

"Vodka. Euch, I need to vacuum!," Essi peeled herself to a seated position as clinks and clatters began in the kitchen. She hopped in the shower to rinse the day off, and after a few minutes, there was a knock on the bathroom door. 

"Yeeees?" she called, playfully. 

"Drink delivery!" Lambert hollered back, "you want this now or later?" 

"Why are you so good to me?" 

There was a draught of cool air as Lambert opened the bathroom door, "Because you only marginally annoy me. Here," he passed his hand between the shower wall and the opaque fish-scale-patterned curtain. "What's on the docket for tonight?" 

Essi groaned, "I don't know, I'm sorry. I used all my brain cells trying not to murder people on the streetcar." 

"Okay," Lambert sat on the lidded toilet, "here's the thing. I kinda maybe figured that might be the case so I kinda maybe picked up a few things to make dinner." 

A shampoo-piled head poked out from behind the curtain, "You're kidding." 

"Nuh-uh." 

"I love you." 

Lambert chuckled, "Yeah, you're alright. Come on, hurry up, this bathroom's a fuckin’ sauna, and I don’t want the croutons to get soggy." Essi burbled an answer about conditioner and almost done, and Lambert took that as his cue to leave.

Dinner was simple: pan fried Salmon with crispy skin (delicate and buttery on the inside); wax beans in butter (tender and not overcooked); grilled brussels sprouts (just beginning to brown on the edges); and a fresh caesar salad. Everything done to perfection. Full, content, and ready to take their relaxation to the next step they settled themselves on Essi’s blue-grey sectional to begin the arduous task of deciding what to watch. 

This was proving particularly difficult with the addition of Essi's caveat that whatever they chose not be "too plot-heavy" which so far had included Masterchef, an interior design show, and program about shepherding in the Orkneys. 

"Sweetheart, you gotta give me some slack here. I thought I was on track with the sheep!" 

"I know, I'm sorry!" Essi muffled into his shirt sleeve. "I do like animals..." She gasped loudly. "BLUE PLANET."

Lambert stopped the endless scrolling and pushed play as the soothing voice of David Attenborough filled the small living room.

"Hey! Why'd you pause it?" 

Lambert was standing up, "If we're going to do this, then we're doing it right. Hang on." 

Essi slumped on the sofa as the microwave kicked on. In a few minutes, there was popcorn in their laps and half a bottle of vodka on the table with an ice bucket and lemon wedges in a bowl. Lambert read off his phone screen.

"We will take a drink when: 

-David says 'Extraordinary' -David uses a clear understatement such as 'But then again, living in an active volcano is not without its risks' -An animal is being eaten -An animal is mating -There is sped up footage of a plant growing."

"Oh no," Essi lamented, chewing her popcorn ungracefully, "I'm going to get so drunk." 

"You got it, Goldilocks. Fill up."

And with that, they were off, taking it slow with their vodka twists, but nonetheless feeling the warm buzz start to tingle under their skin. The box of microwave popcorn was empty by halfway through, and the remains of Essi's exhaustion had almost dispersed entirely.

"Ooh! Understatement! Drink!!" 

By ten o’clock, pink-cheeked and feeling boisterous, they had finished with their favourite parts of Blue Planet, or at least the ones they had patience for, and had moved on to Planet Earth II.

“Holy fuck, that’s a lot of snakes—Go, you little fucker! Go!”

The drama on the screen had caused the two to separate from one another while Lambert invested himself in the success of the small lizard. Once the baby Galapagos Iguana had made it to safety, they were once again able to recline without Essi risking an elbow to the face.

She bundled against him, scooting farther between his legs where he leaned in the corner of the sectional. He gathered her hair and draped it over her left shoulder so it wouldn't get caught in his buttons—they'd learned that the hard way. It was still damp, cool to the touch, and smelled like verbena sea salt shampoo. He felt a pulse of affection ripple through him as her weight resettled. He loved that feeling. It had taken some time to get used to it. But now it was high on his list of favourite things. He was happy. And it was healthy. And that really was all that mattered. 

Right?

Eskel’s words turned themselves around again in his mind as he wrapped his arm around the front of Essi’s shoulders. He let himself indulge in the texture of her cotton knit nightshirt under his fingers. He relished in the peace of mind at being able to just be there with someone who meant something to him and made absolutely no demands. He let himself relax. 

Essi felt a kiss land on the top of her head with a playful, "Muwah!" 

She giggled quietly, "Thank you!" Then, upon further thought… Did he want to kiss her? Her mind did a double take as she tried to get on top of the ball.  

It wasn’t impossible. They were close after all, and she wasn’t opposed to the idea. She’d recently found herself in a balancing act of realizing she could, in theory, have a deeper kind of feeling for Lambert. Only if, for whatever reason, it turned out he felt the same way. These weren’t the helpless uncontrollable feelings of ride-or-die infatuation; they were malleable, translatable, general feelings of affection and fondness that belonged in any number of different relationships and dynamics. 

No sense risking it, she thought. They'd found a liminal space of comfort and safety that she'd never experienced with anyone else before, and if the options were between being a little confused and ruining everything, the choice was an easy one. Then again, if Lambert was developing feelings for her, she didn’t want to miss an opportunity. Shit. Her cheeks burned as she felt the question rise closer to her lips. 

"Lambert?" she sat up abruptly and turned to her friend who was still moulded into the corner of the couch, watching the mating rituals of exotic birds with bewildered skepticism. 

He jolted at Essi’s sudden movement, "Hello, yes." 

Her bright blue eyes were now slightly unfocused, "Do you—? Nevermind." She lay back against him, suddenly skittish..

"Mm, nah, try again," he said, sluggishly. "What’s up, buttercup?" 

She swayed a little when she sat up, "Are you happy with what we are?"

Lambert blinked, caught slightly off-guard. The question was easy enough to answer, "Yeah! I mean I don’t know what the fuck we are, but I’m feeling pretty good about it. Shit, why? Are you not? I can be less… whatever. Or… more?" It wasn’t like he was repulsed by the idea of anything else happening between them—in theory it was a possibility. In practice, however...

Essi put an emphatic hand on Lambert’s knee, her glassy eyes going wide, "Do you want more?" 

"What? No! I dunno, I—maybe. I haven’t really thought about it. I mean…” Lambert searched Essi’s face for any clue that might help him know how to proceed, “I don’t not want anything else. Fuck, I don’t know! I’m used to doing things the other way around. You know the drill: uncomfortable date, smoosh faces together, have sex, hope feelings fall out. Lather-rinse-repeat. I dunno, do we have to… But what if we try something and...? I don’t wanna lose this." 

Essi leaned in close and whispered, “I have an idea.”

"Why do I feel like I'm going to regret this?" 

"We should kiss."

Lambert nearly swallowed an ice cube, "What?!"

"Just once. Quickly. Just... in case." 

"You want me, Lambert, to kiss you, Essi Daven, on the lips."

She nodded sincerely, "For science."

There was a brief pause during which Essi felt the beginnings of panic brewing in her stomach, but by the time she'd finished grappling with potential consequences, Lambert was filling their glasses. 

"Alright. Fine. My friend wants me to kiss her for science? Fuck it. I'll drink to that." 

They downed their drinks and squared up, knee to knee on the edge of the sofa as they each prepared for their best form—or as good as they could offer given the circumstances. They counted down, 3-2-1...

The kiss was quick, over as soon as it had begun, and both friends pulled away with questioning looks. Inconclusive. They tried again for a little longer, still returning with the same quizzical expressions. They went in for a third time, committing more thoroughly, and for a brief moment it seemed they might have found the semblance of a spark. But it didn’t build. It felt… fine? But no different than if they were lying together on the sofa. It was just another thing they were doing. They each tried to find the right word for what they were feeling, but were soon distracted by the oddness of it all.   

Essi started to giggle. Less than a second later, Lambert joined her, and they both pulled away, thoroughly satisfied that their experiment had yielded a strong No on the subject of More. There was a dull thud as Essi slid from the couch and onto the floor, still holding her drink in one hand and laughing hysterically. 

Lambert sighed and shook his head, "I think it’s time we got you to bed."

Headaches and dry mouths greeted the two friends the next morning when they blinked awake. Essi’s hair was a cotton-candy mess, having still been slightly damp when Lambert put her to bed. The brunet himself didn’t look much different from his usual scruffy state as he gathered Essi up in an armful of duvet and squeezed tight.

“Gods, Lambert, I still need to breathe,” Essi chuckled, pressing her back into his chest. 

“You’ll get over it,” he teased and self-indulgently nuzzled even closer. “You feeling alright? I mean, aside from the hangover. About last night?” 

“Oh no,” Essi groaned, “I’m so sorry, Lambert. I shouldn’t have said anything. It’s just—you kissed my head and then that got me wondering about whether you might want something else, and then I didn’t really know what was happening and—” 

“Hey, easy on the rambling, okay, I’m running on limited brain cells, here. Look,” Lambert sat up to find those big blue eyes, now shining brightly, “I have no idea what the fuck this is that we’ve got going on, but I like it fine just the way it is.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. And we can keep talking about that. Just, you know, maybe next time something’s on your mind, don’t wait ‘til we’re wasted at 2am?”

“Okay, deal. Can we go get bacon now?”

Lambert chuckled, “Yeah, alright, fine. Make me put pants on, I see how it is.”

Their conversation continued over strong coffee and eggs benedicts. Between their check-in that morning and everything that had happened the previous night, it was well-established that they were perfectly happy where they were. Rather, the main topic of conversation was their growing desire to level with their friends about the nature of their relationship. Eskel and Geralt, they both agreed, would be the easiest—Lambert could tell them that evening. Julian and Essi’s friends on the other hand would be a little more difficult. 

Telling Julian together would be best, Essi thought. He was bound to have questions, and if both she and Lambert were there to answer them definitively and explain that no, they didn’t have secret feelings for one another; and yes, they really were just friends and not at all interested in exploring the relationship further thank you very much. Exactly when this discussion with Julian would occur still wasn’t clear. Realistically, they could pick any time, but they decided to wait until Lambert could tell the Old Men. At least then they were assured some less invasive support. 

Their reaction was easy enough to predict: Eskel reassuringly repeated his standby “As long as you’re both happy with things…” and twirled a forkful of pasta; Geralt tilted his head thoughtfully and said, “That sounds very nice. I’m happy for you.” Lambert had expected mild disapproval, concern that they were deviating too far from the norm and into a complex dynamic that would be too messy to manage. Instead, Geralt simply said it ‘sounded very nice.’ Lambert smiled into the open refrigerator on his way to get a beer. 

The following weekend was Julian’s birthday, and, as per their annual tradition, the group all gathered on Friday evening at the birthday boy’s favourite restaurant—Vegelbud’s. The two decided to tell him the week after his birthday so as not to detract from his Big 3-0. Just one more week, and it would all be in the open. Easy breasy.

The afternoon of the dinner, Eskel and Geralt received a group text: Haven’t told Julian the details yet. Keep the beans to yourselves please (I’m looking at you, @Eskel). 

“Why me?” Eskel turned to Geralt over his paperwork, looking a little hurt. 

Geralt chuckled, “You have a slight tendency to overshare when you want to be supportive.”

“I do?” He turned on the bar stool to follow his partner on the way upstairs.

“It’s not a bad thing, but…” Geralt sighed, “Lambert has always needed to feel in control of situations like this. He doesn’t want one of us bringing this up before he’s ready to talk about it, especially in a public place, you know how he gets when he feels cornered. And Julian is Essi’s cousin…”

Eskel raised a hand, “You’re right, you’re right. All points taken. Are you showering?”

Geralt smirked as he headed for the stairs, “Come on then.” 

Four hours later and halfway through dinner, everything had gone swimmingly. The food had been expectedly delicious, the company and conversation excellent, and so far no one had felt the need to bring up Essi and Lambert’s relationship on any level. That is until Julian got a few drinks under his belt, and decided it was time to document the occasion. Geralt and Eskel were the first victims. 

“Aww just look at you two! So in love, so vivacious and full of adoration,” Julian held up his phone as Geralt touched the side of his head to Eskel’s. Beep-Chk! A perfect image of a happy couple was captured and posted to Instagram (#julianturns30 #dinneratvagelbuds #dinnerout #cutiesofinstagram #favoriteotp #gaycouplesofinstagram #livelaughlove…). There were a few more photos of the three of them together, the white chocolate raspberry cheesecake with the candle in it, a group shot taken by the waiter. It was all so close to being over, Essi could practically taste the refuge of the streetcar. 

"Come on, lovebirds, show us a smooch!" Oh no. Oh no, oh no, oh no. Essi’s stomach lurched and she felt her cheeks start to warm. Lambert’s hand landed gently on her knee under the table, his fingers pressing firmly into her leg as she desperately tried to think of something to say. 

"Oh, um..." 

Across the table, Geralt and Eskel shared a wordless communication: de-escalate, distract, redirect.

“You’ll want to eat that cheesecake before it gets warm” Geralt offered. “I hear it’s so light it’ll disintegrate in a heartbeat.” Eskel nodded in encouragement, taking a bite of his own. 

“I know, I know,” Julian shrugged, “Just a quick one. Say Cheese!”

"Not right now, Julian," Essi tilted her head, her eyes flashing a little. 

"Oh come on, Poppet! I know you don't like PDA, it's just one little picture--"

“Don’t call me Poppet.”

Eskel cleared his throat loudly, "Doesn't seem they're that keen on it. Maybe let's try for one another time." 

"It's past your one-month-a-versary, let everyone see how in love you are." 

"Julian," Geralt growled, "leave it." 

Julian covered his mouth in alarm, "I’m so sorry, have you not used that word yet? I didn’t mean anything by it, I just want the world to see how happy my beautiful cousin is!" 

“Really Julian, it’s not necessary we—” Essi’s fingernails were starting to dig into Lambert’s palm from the sheer effort of maintaining composure. She wasn’t sure whether she wanted to cry or disappear, and with neither of those being an option, it seemed the only possible escape was for them to kiss. They’d done it before. No big deal. It would feel off, but they’d just go back to her place and drink about it after. 

“Essi, what’s the matter with you, it’s just one little picture, and we all know you’re not camera-shy. On three, ready? One, two…”

"For fuck's sake we're not dating!" 

The table all silently turned their attention to Essi whose cheeks had been turning progressively redder. 

“What?” Her cousin laughed incredulously. 

“We’re not a couple, Julian. We’re friends. We have been from the beginning, but we didn’t want to tell you because we knew you wouldn’t fucking leave us alone until you could boast about having set us up.”

Lambert shared a brief look with Eskel before lowering his eyes to the tablecloth, his hand still firmly clutched in Essi’s. 

Julian gaped, “So, it was all… the cuddling, the laughing, that time I came over and you were asleep on the couch, that was all… a ruse?” 

“No, Julian, that was real. I told you, we’re friends.”

“That’s not friends! Since when have friends watched a movie half-on-top of each other?” 

“Two people can enjoy each other's company lying flat, Julian,” Eskel’s rich voice interjected across the table and the discussion ground to a halt. 

Geralt shrugged with his tea at his lips, “It is the twenty-first century after all.”

Julian’s cornflower blue eyes flitted back and forth between the two friends, utterly bewildered. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Well what with your complete and utter invasion of privacy for the sake of hooking us up, we didn’t necessarily trust you to believe us,” Essi answered curtly, her hand shaking slightly. 

“Poppet, you could have just told me—”

“Stop. Calling me that. And I did tell you, Julian!” she exploded. “I told you the first day I moved here. The first. Day. I said, ‘Julian, I think I want to take a break from dating until I’ve been settled for a year.’ And what did you do? Conspired with my well-meaning former mentor to hook me up with someone I had one good conversation with at a Christmas party. And do you know what? We are happy. But we’re happy in our own way. And maybe our boundaries with each other seem a little strange to you, but we’re not fooling ourselves. We don’t want to kiss each other, we don’t want to have sex, and we don’t want a relationship. And even though it’s absolutely none of your damn business, I’ll tell you anyway: we’ve talked about it. All of it. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I don’t think I want to be here anymore.” 

The chair legs scraped against the floor of the restaurant as Essi stood to leave, throwing her purse over her shoulder as she went. Lambert looked hesitantly around the table, “I should probably, you know…” He gestured after Essi with his thumb. Eskel gave Lambert the go ahead and he quickly stood to follow his friend out of the restaurant, leaving a very stunned Julian with the other two. He found her perched on the parking barrier in the small lot to the left of the front doors. He called to her and she looked up. Eyes shining, mascara running... 

“Ah shit, you know I’m no good with this kind of thing.” 

“I’m sorry, Lambert, I just—” she blew her nose, “—he just wouldn’t stop and I didn’t know what to do or say, and it all just came pouring out. I didn’t want it to. The whole time I was begging myself to stop, but I just couldn’t, it’s been bottled up for so long and-and—but it’s his birthday, and—oh, he must feel so awful! I didn’t want to make him feel bad, but—and with Eskel and Geralt there too! They must think I’m horrible! I’m so sorry, Lambert, I didn’t want it to be like this, I wanted to have him over and sit him down and be patient, and instead I’ve just made a complete mess of things. And on his birthday! It’s his birthday, oh God, this is the worst thing I could have done.” Essi choked back bitter tears as she tried desperately to stem the flow with her soggy tissue, “Are you upset with me, Lambert? If you are, I understand. Maybe we should take a break of some kind, you know. Not see each other for a while and—”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold it right there. Look, I’m probably not going to say any of the right stuff here, but I am absolutely not upset with you. You got that? And for what it’s worth, I don’t think us taking a break from spending time together is going to do anything. Unless you’re looking to punish yourself by taking away a nice thing which, okay. But the fact that you’re willing to ditch me instead of Arbor Mist says something about our friendship I’m not too pleased with.” 

Essi turned her wide, pleading, bloodshot eyes to Lambert who cracked a smile, “Jesus, I’m kidding! You adorable fucking mess, c’mere.” He pulled his petite friend into a hug and rested his chin on the top of her head until she quieted down. Neither of them was quite sure how much time had gone by, but Essi found herself wishing it had been long enough for everyone to have gone home so she didn’t have to face whatever aftermath she’d left behind. 

Meanwhile, Eskel and Geralt had settled the bill and offered to give Julian a lift back to their place for a night cap, not wanting to leave the evening on such an unsettled note. Essi needed space, and whatever company she needed, Lambert was clearly capable of providing. It was for the best, they suggested, and dissuaded Julian from trying to call her. 

“Best to sleep on things,” Geralt said, tucking his card back into his wallet and giving the waiter a nod in gratitude. “We can meet for coffee this weekend and sort this out. For now, just let her cool down.” 

Eskel clapped Julian encouragingly on the shoulder as they made their way into the damp summer night air. As they turned into the parking lot, they came face-to-face with Essi and Lambert who had clearly just turned to come back inside. Both cousins looked like they had seen better days: Essi’s eyes were puffy and red, her cheeks blotchy and streaked with inky makeup stains; Julian was perhaps less dishevelled, but the dark circles under his eyes were more pronounced, his boyish features now dejectedly weighted down with remorse and hurt. 

“Juian, I’m so sorry, I didn’t—” 

Essi’s cousin raised his hand, “Don’t. Please don’t. Essi, I am so, so sorry. I never meant to push you like that, I didn't realize... you both have been so happy this last month and—"

"It's okay, really, we can talk about this all another time. I'm just so sorry I ruined your birthday. We wanted to sit down with you and talk properly but..." Essi's tears welled up again, and Julian smiled weakly. 

"But we both did what we always do?"

She sniffed, nodding emphatically with a tearful, "Yeah.” Julian pulled his cousin into a fond embrace while the other three clumped together to watch the reconciliation. 

“Oh! Here,” Essi reached into her purse and pulled out a small, neatly-wrapped box. “Happy birthday!” 

Julian opened his gift without a second thought, his face brightening instantly. The box contained a set of premium ultra-light guitar strings and a pair of concert tickets. The perfect gift. Overwhelmed with gratitude, and the atmosphere having been recovered, Julian suggested they all attend brunch together that Sunday morning, his treat by way of apology. Geralt offered to split the bill as a peace offering for his part in the initial setup, and the five made a date. 

A fresh start, a promise of spending time together with fewer secrets and, Julian conceded, a few more boundaries. 

[pressedinthepages]

Decembert Day 21 - Midivaerne

@continentcakeshop thanks as always for the encouragement <3

Rating: T

Content Tags: TW3 Lambert, Essbert, half-elf Essi, fluff

Summary: On the longest night of the year, Essi takes Lambert into the forest for a night of secret celebration.

Lambert felt like his arm was about to leave his socket as he was dragged through an unfamiliar forest, his feet struggling to keep ground as he was pulled along. Essi had him by the wrist and was practically at full sprint over bent logs and gnarled trees.

“And just where, Bard-“ Lambert dodged a branch where it threatened to send him reeling into a concussion, “are you taking me? It’s the middle of the night-“

“When the moon is highest,” Essi smiled back at him, her blue eye twinkling while the other was hidden beneath her wavy golden hair, “is when the festivities begin.”

“Cause that’s not ominous or anything-”

“Oh, would you just trust me?” Essi finally stopped and turned to Lambert, placing her hand softly on the tendon in his neck. A vulnerable spot that very few were allowed to touch. She knew that he trusted her, trusted her deeper than almost anyone on the Continent. Lambert nodded and Essi smiled, leading him along once more.

After not too much longer, Essi stopped them once more, her hair drifting oddly in the breezeless night. Lambert looked around the empty forest, feeling a queer pull in the back of his stomach.

Essi locked their fingers together and stepped forward slowly with Lambert right behind her. He felt something drag over his head, an invisible fabric woven between the trees and the chilly night air. He blinked, and instead of the tightly packed woods with nary a soul to be found, there was a great party. Elves, tall and short and fair and dark and lean and chubby, mingled and danced as balls of light bounced merrily between the trees.

“Wha…” Lambert couldn’t keep his eyes in one place, there was too much to see. Tables filled to the brim with meats and cheeses and fruits, dresses swirling over the ground that glittered in the magical light, people whose very beings had been threatened for decades but still wandered the earth, still found each other in times of celebration.

“It’s Midivaerne,” Essi whispered with a smile into Lambert’s ear. “One of the only times of the year that Elves can celebrate without worrying of being found. The veil of magic is thin, and what runs in the Elves' blood is enough to keep us hidden through the night.”

“Us?” Lambert looked down to Essi with a crinkle in his brow.

Essi laughed lightly, a sweet thing that twisted Lambert’s gut into a comfortable little knot. “Yes, us. I thought you knew. I’m half-Elf, that’s how I was able to get us through the veil.”

Lambert hummed. “You know? That makes a hell of a lot of sense. So…” he looked around at the group of people, watching them laugh and smile through the pain of persecution hanging like a cloud above them, “what exactly do we do?”

“Well,” Essi tilted her head, “we dance, drink, eat. Prepare for Yule, visit with those we’ve not seen in far too long. Introduce new friends. Like you…”

“Oh no, no. I don’t need to make any sort of entrance. I’m more than happy to be your side-piece for the night and drink until I get a nice little buzz behind my eyes.”

“I know, Lambert,” Essi squeezed his hand gently. “You’ll do just fine at my side. Besides, there’s nowhere else that I’d rather you be.”

[pressedinthepages]

Clean

@witcher-rarepair-summer-bingo

also thanks to friends in the Cake Shop for the encouragement, and to @sometimesiwrite for the nudges in the right direction :D

Prompt: *Bathtub*

Relationship: Lambert/Essi

Rating: Teen

Content Warnings: fluff, non-sexual nudity, brief thirsty thoughts, first kiss

Summary: Lambert is in desperate need of a bath, and Essi is more than happy to lend a helping hand.

“Gods above, Lambert, you smell like you just crawled out of the depths of hell.”

Lambert shook his head and rolled his eyes. “Not hell. Just a nest of nekkers. Not exactly known for their sweet, floral scents.”

Essi sighed and set her lute down at the foot of her bed. Lambert’s bed lay across the room, yet his was untouched. “Here,” she said, striding to the corner that kept a small wooden tub tucked away, “let me get one of the girls downstairs to fill this for you.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Lambert scowled as he untied the knot keeping his gambeson closed, “I’m used to the shit monster smell.”

“Just because you’re used to it doesn’t mean that you need to wallow in it all night. C’mon, your poor nostrils must be burning.” Essi spoke quickly and clearly as she turned the tub on its side to roll into the middle of the room.

Lambert took a deep breath (yes, through his mouth, shut up) and stubbornly crossed his arms. “Cool it, bard. We don’t need to waste the coin when I can just rinse off in a river when we get back on the trail tomorrow.”

Essi let the tub slam down onto the floor and matched Lambert in posture, her own arms crossed and her head cocked as she observed him through her very bright eyes. “It’s not a waste of coin, Lambert. We have plenty, you’re just being an ass.”

“This is not a new phenomenon-”

“Dammit, Lambert! Let me do this one thing for you. Please.”

Lambert paused, casting a scrutinizing eye towards Essi. Gods, she was almost shimmering, passion brewing from her very being. And yes, while Lambert may have been one of the most stubborn bastards to have ever walked on the Continent, he was also tired. And Essi seemed sincere, not wanting to do this for him for her own benefit, but actually just...for his.

Weird.

“Fine,” Lambert groused through gritted teeth, “but you make sure that they make it hot enough. If I’m taking a bath, I want the damned full experience.”

Essi nodded with finality and let a gentle smile turn the corners of her lips. “Would you like for me to see if one of them would come help? I can go and give you some privacy, if you’d like-”

Lambert sputtered as he watched Essi slide her shoes on. “N-no. Don’t do that.”

Essi shrugged, “Alright. You said you wanted the ‘full experience’ which, for men, usually involves a woman’s hand.”

“Women don’t typically take kindly to Witchers in their tubs,” Essi scowled at Lambert’s words. “Besides, I just need to get clean. I don’t need all the fancy stuff.”

Essi peered over at him with an odd look on her face. Lambert couldn’t really place it. Not pity, not amusement, nor abashedness. Just...odd. “Whatever you say, Lambert. Would you still like some time for yourself? I really don’t mind stepping ou-”

“Stay. I don’t wanna kick you out. Besides, it’s cold out. You should keep by the fire.” Lambert...wasn’t really sure where all that came from, but he could tell that it wasn’t the answer that Essi was expecting either.

Essi looked over her shoulder to him as she set her hand on the doorknob. “Alright, Lambert. I’ll see what I can round up for you.”

Lambert could hear her feet bounce down the steps towards the tavern below. He sighed to himself and continued on with removing the outer layers of his armor. The gambeson was first to hit the floor, left to the side so that he could properly clean it later. Yeah, he thought as he raised his arms above his head and caught a whiff of himself, maybe I did need that bath.

He slipped off his gloves next, flexing his newly freed fingers a bit as he threw the gloves to the floor. The boots were toed off at the door and his potions belt was set next to them. He was just contemplating the ties on his trousers when he heard approaching footsteps with a familiar cadence.

Essi knocked before she entered, as she always did whenever the two of them traveled together. Lambert never really understood it, but he also appreciated it nonetheless. The Path was not made with privacy in mind, so he cherished every little bit that he could get. He called her in and she kept the door propped open behind her.

“The innkeeper’s daughter will be up in a few moments with the water, she’s got it heating up now.” Lambert kinda lost himself in the high pink planes of her cheeks and the glow behind her crystalline eyes before the words registered in his brain.

Lambert nodded and stepped back so that Essi could set an armful of towels down on her bed and rifle through her pack. She emerged with a handful of little glass bottles and a soft scrap cloth. He quirked a brow and tried to look over just what she had snuck in here. “What’s all of that?”

Essi chuckled and glanced back over to him. “What does it look like? You said ‘full experience,’ so I brought it!”

Lambert shook his head and smirked, “I also said you didn’t need to worry about all of that. Besides, I don’t do all of the smelly soaps, it’s too much for my no-”

“Yes, I know. That’s why I chose these. Here,” Essi uncorked a small bottle and held it at arm’s length, “try this one.”

Lambert stepped forward and leaned down, just barely sniffing the contents of the bottle, fully prepared for an assault on his senses. He furrowed his brow and inhaled deeper, only just barely catching a trace of earthy spices on the tail end of the air. “That’s...not too bad. Where did you find this?”

Essi smiled wide and turned back to the other glasses on her bed. “You know, I don’t spend all of my time with Witchers. I have a friend back in Oxenfurt who is an alchemist, and they like to make soaps and such. I asked if they had anything that might not be too aggressive for your nose, and they didn’t. But they did have a few ideas, so they finished up this batch by the last time I stopped in. I’ve been trying to figure out the best way to give them to you, and now seemed like a good enough time as any, and-”

Lambert shook his head and held out his hand, palm up. Essi stopped rambling and carefully set the assortment of bottles into his grasp. “Essi. I...I can’t pay you back for this, not right now. I can’t just drop coin on this kind of stuff-”

“You don’t have to pay me back, Lambert. It’s a gift. One that you very much deserve.”

Lambert felt something weird rising up in his chest and tug behind his stomach. “I-hmpf. Thank you, Essi. It...it means a lot that you would think of something like this for me.”

Essi reached out and placed her hand gently on Lambert’s arm. “Of course. You’ll have to tell me what you think of them, and I can pass the message back to my friend for their next batch.”

Lambert ran his thumb back and forth over the smooth glass in his hand. He could feel the warmth of Essi’s skin radiate from her palm and through his linen shirt, and he wanted so desperately to be able to find the words to thank her properly. “Essi, I-”

A knock on the door startled them both and Lambert cursed himself for getting so caught up that he didn’t even hear the poor girl climbing the stairs. He pulled open the door and stepped aside for her to clamber into the room with a large pot. She upended it into the tub, letting steaming water slosh around and immediately fill the air with the thickness.

“Anything else that I can help you with?” The young woman asked kindly, crossing her hands in front of her and looking up at Lambert. He shook his head and let her out of the room, closing and bolting the door behind her.

Essi smoothed her hands down her trousers as she looked Lambert up and down. He felt her gaze rover over his skin and felt a not-unwelcome prickle at the back of his neck. “Well, are you gonna bathe, or were you wanting to just get in like that and call your laundry done?”

Lambert actually let out a bark of laughter at that one, his heart warming when he heard Essi laughing a bit herself. “No, not gonna waste this hot water on my laundry. You mind if I go ahead then?”

Essi shook her head and took the bottles back out of his hand. “Go on, it’s not like I’ve never seen a naked man.”

Lambert felt the ghost of her fingers across his palm before he reached up behind his neck to grab onto the collar of his undershirt and lift it over his head. He wrinkled his nose as he chucked it to the side, apparently now making a pile for his laundry too. While Lambert wasn’t exactly ashamed of his body, he knew that it could be...distressing for humans. Scars and burns decorated his skin and, while he was leaner than his other Wolves, he still had muscles that shifted and danced as he moved that were never really paid attention to by others. He turned away for Essi and untied his trousers before pushing them down his thighs, and while he may have caught her heart beating a bit quicker than before, it was probably just his mind.

Lambert kicked away the trousers to rest with his shirt and carefully covered his manhood with his hand before he turned back around. As he faced Essi once more, he watched in real time as her eyes drank in his body, lines crawling up and down and around, making his head swim with the sudden feeling of being seen. Not necessarily just looked at, but something more, something deeper. Something he didn’t have a name for.

Essi blinked a few times and swallowed thickly before meeting Lambert’s eyes from beneath the curl of her bangs. “Well...hmm. You uh, you should go ahead and hop in before it gets too cold.”

Lambert caught the flush of her cheeks and how her fingers sort of fidgeted at her sides, drawing his attention away from her eyes. Lambert tried to balance carefully as he stepped into the tub, one arm still occupied with keeping himself covered from Essi’s piercing gaze. Lambert’s foot broke the surface of the bath and he felt the heat crawl up beneath his skin as he fully stepped in. The water would have been scalding to a human, but to Lambert? Oh, hot fucking water was pure bliss.

He shuffled a bit as he sat down into the tub, finally finding a position with his head leaning back on the rim and his knees bent and poking above the surface of the water. He sighed as his muscles relaxed into the heat, and he closed his eyes and just let his mind quiet for a few moments. Though, he could hear Essi fiddling with something, her hands as restless as her mind, it seemed.

“Essi?”

“Hmm?” Lambert smiled a bit and peeked open one eye when he heard her voice, clearly a bit caught off guard. Her hum had been a little higher than normal, and a bit too quick.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to, but I could use a hand with washing my hair-”

“Oh!” Essi jumped up and clambered for the array of bottles that she had spread back out on the bed. “I don’t mind at all, if you’re sure…”

Lambert hummed his assent and closed his eyes once more, listening to Essi patter about the room for a moment before coming to rest behind him. He heard a stool be set down and the gentle shifting of fabric as she sat atop it. “Right then,” she murmured, keeping her voice low and soft, “should I use that one soap I showed you, or a different one?”

Lambert shrugged as he sat up, his body warm and loose from the bath. “Maybe do that one for my hair, and I can try a different one for the rest of me?”

Lambert ducked under the water and ran his hands through his hair, rubbing down his face and along his jaw as he resurfaced. He felt the rivers of water trail down his spine and heard the telltale pacing of Essi’s heart fluttering in her chest.

He smirked as he chanced a glance over his shoulder to her. “Gonna just stare at my back all day?”

Essi, to her credit, hesitated for only half a heartbeat, just enough for Lambert to know that he had, in fact, caught her doing just that. She then huffed good-naturedly and reached out for his shoulders. “Well, if I could reach you, that would be ideal.”

Lambert hummed as he leaned and felt her hands guide him by the shoulders back to resting at the edge of the bath. He heard her take a deep breath, one that he knew was to steel the nerves. He found himself wanting to do the same, but for his own.

“Comfortable?” Essi murmured, her hands still resting lightly on the junction between Lambert’s neck and shoulders.

“Mhm,” Lambert nodded and let his eyes close. He could feel the pulse of Essi’s blood swirl beneath her fingertips, and the huffs of her breath ghost over his skin. The warm water soothed his muscles and led him down into a pseudo-meditative state, still aware of the world around him, but able to focus in on little bits of sensation as he wished.

He felt Essi’s hands leave him as she reached for one of the bottles at her side. As she pulled out the stopper, Lambert caught another whiff of the same scent from earlier. That dark, musty, earthy scent, raindrops pillowed on moss. It was accompanied now by honey and verbena, the light air wafting down from the thick golden tendrils of Essi’s hair.

Essi poured a dollop of soap into her hand and set the bottle back onto the floor before lathering her hands together. “Alright, I’ll start with your hair. Still good?”

“Yeah, fine,” Lambert hummed as he felt her fingers drag up along his scalp. He just barely held back a moan from escaping his throat as she lightly scratched back and forth through his hair, working the soap into soft, fragrant bubbles that trailed down over his forehead.

Essi began to hum, low and quiet, just barely a sound trailing from her lips. It lilted and bounced along the air with no clear direction, no endgame. Just...to be. She watched Lambert’s shoulders relax, the line of his spine dipping down further into the water and the dark hairs on his chest catching suds as they fell from the damp ends of his hair.

Once his hair was properly scrubbed, the scruff that it was, Essi let her hands follow the trail of suds down his neck to his shoulders, massaging tight and tired muscles as she went. Lambert did not succeed in holding back the groan that creaked from his throat as he crumpled slightly.

“Want to pick another one of the soaps, or should I pick for you?” Essi murmured, still smoothing her hands gently back and forth along the line of his shoulders, squeezing the muscles beneath with every pass.

Lambert hummed and shifted in the bath, the water sloshing around as he adjusted his hips. “You can pick. I trust you.”

Essi smiled as she turned to the little collection of bottles by her foot, grabbing a little bottle scented with lemongrass and sage, dabbing a small pool into the palm of her hand and working up a lather, spreading it along his arms and onto the top of his chest. She paused when she realized she wasn’t certain just how much more she could cover without… well, crossing some lines they’d never really discussed. They were friends, had become quite close in their travels. Essi knew that Lambert trusted her, just as she did in return. But some things just...hadn’t been addressed between them.

Essi scooted around so she was face to face with Lambert and washed down the line of his arm, working the suds and watching his chest rise and fall with long, deep breaths. “Alright...legs next?”

Lambert peeked open an eye, glancing around as if he were worried they’d be caught doing something inappropriate. He cleared his throat and closed his eye once more. “Y-yeah. Yeah sure. Fine.”

“Are you sure? I could not if you’d rather—”

Lambert limply waved his hand, “Nah, you’re fine. Go for it.”

Essi nodded and got to work, spreading the lather up and down his legs, massaging his feet and calves, working up to the tender muscles just above his knees.

“Oi!” He jerked away suddenly and Essi withdrew, worrying she’d accidentally hit on a tender scar or an injury from earlier. To her relief and amusement, Lambert smirked, “Tickles.”

“Sorry,” Essi snickered, “want me to move elsewhere?”

“Nah, you’re fine. Just uh-just don’t be too light there or else you may wind up with my foot to your face. Not on purpose mind you, but-”

“Alright, alright,” Essi laughed, kneading her thumbs more deeply into the skin of his thigh. Lambert’s head thunked back against the rim of the tub.

“Gods, woman. You’re going to be the death of me, you know that?” Lambert sighed as he wiped his hand down along the line of his jaw.

Essi shook her head with a snicker, “Oh please Lambert. Don’t even start with m-”

“You and I both know that I would absolutely not be in a warm bath with a very pretty woman washing me just the way I like if not for you weaseling your way into my Path.” Lambert once again wasn’t sure where that came from, but Gods know it was true. Every little bit.

Essi’s cheeks went bright red, “Nonsense, Lambert. I never weasel anywhere, and certainly not onto the path. But I’ll take the credit all the same for being pretty and stubborn.”

Lambert hummed and waved his hand around dramatically. “Bah, semantics. You know how I hate when you get caught up in word play-”

Essi scoffed with a great smile on her face, “Oh, don’t you dare lie to me! You love my word play, you and that sharp mind of yours. Admit it, you’d be bored to death otherwise.”

“Someone’s taking a lot of credit this evening. Never mind the nest of fuckin’ ogroids I just destroyed so an entire village could resettle.” Lambert opened his eyes and sat up, letting his leg fall back into the water. He braced his hands on either side of the tub and-oh fuck, Essi was now much closer than anticipated.

Lambert watched her throat bob as she licked her lips and swallowed, her eyes darting quickly down to his mouth and back up once more. They sat frozen like that for a moment, a hair’s breadth away from pushing into uncharted territory.

Essi cleared her throat and looked up at the suds threatening to drip down into Lambert’s eyes. “Perhaps you should rinse, then I can make sure that everything’s clean?”

“Uh… yeah-yeah, sure.” Lambert plunged his head under the water and was grateful for a moments’ grace from whatever the fuck that was. He emerged and pinched the water clear from his nose, scrubbing at his hair and blinking profusely—he hated going under water.

Essi watched him scrub away the last remaining drops of water from his beard and fucking shit why-

“Here,” she said, reaching out (Essi, keep it together. What exactly do you think you’re doing here-) “Let me scrub your chest one last time. Just to be sure.”

“Ah, it’s okay, you really don’t have to-”

“Do you not want me t-”

“No! No, I mean if you want… I just don’t want you to feel like you have to if-”

“I don’t mind!”

“It is… nice. I mean, your hands are—” Fuckingshitfuck “—you’re good at this,” Lambert gestured broadly, hoping to alleviate the feeling of having his entire foot in his mouth. Lambert shifted forward so that Essi wouldn’t have to bend and reach quite so far, painfully aware of her hand slightly outstretched and reaching for him.

Essi smiled and shook her head. “Thanks, I think. You’re quite good with semantics, though you seem to be running in circles tonight.”

Lambert huffed good-naturedly as he felt Essi’s hands, still warm and soapy, smooth over the broad plane of his chest. Essi hummed appreciatively as she worked the soap into Lambert’s skin, working circles into the hair dusted across the toned muscle. A smile pulled at her lips, her cheeks rosy with the still-hot water and the kind atmosphere that she simply radiated.

“What is it, songbird?” Lambert couldn’t help the little smile that graced his own face while Essi kept her eyes trained steadily on her own hands on his chest.

“I-well. I’ve always loved a man with some good hair on his chest.”

Lambert’s heart quickened from it’s normally slow pace as he felt Essi’s hand still on his chest, and he looked up into her soft blue eyes. She leaned in, just barely a tilt of her head, the always troublesome curl of golden hair falling down into her eye. Lambert reached up, his hand dripping with water, and gently pushed the curl back behind her ear, his fingers glancing over the impossibly soft skin of her cheek.

Essi closed her eyes and let herself hope, just for a moment, that she knew where this was going. She heard Lambert sigh and she blinked up, finding him closing the distance between her with a quiet, “Oh, what the hell.”

Their lips met with Essi’s hands still on Lambert’s chest and his hands in her hair. It was nothing more than a simple peck at first, a sweet push into unknown waters. But that didn’t last long, for she felt Lambert’s hands tighten in her hair and pull her close, licking insistently at the seam of her mouth.

She granted him access with a gasp, working her tongue with his and running her fingers down and around his chest, her fingers teasing the water line. Lambert tasted of woodsmoke and spice and cherries and Essi’s head swam as he kissed her intensely. Gods, Lambert kissed her like she imagined soldiers coming home from the war kissed their wives: methodical, thorough, devouring her soul with teeth and tongue and his hands grasping onto her so tightly that it could’ve hurt if he hadn’t keened lowly into her mouth.

Lambert shifted back, breaking apart from Essi for a gasp of air. She followed him though, pressing their lips back together and clambering into the bathtub, settling in his lap. He laughed into her mouth and settled his hands on her waist, “Essi, what the fuck? You’re gonna get all we-”

“Oh shut up and kiss me again.” Essi ran her fingers through Lambert’s hair as she leaned down, kissing up his jaw and meeting his lips once more.

Oh, this is gonna be fun.

[pressedinthepages]

Decembert Day 16 - Chapped Lips

@continentcakeshop thanks as always for the encouragement <3

Rating: T

Relationship: Lambert/Essi

Content Tags: TW3 Lambert, fluff, smoochin

Summary: At Essi's doorstep, Lambert worries that she might not be happy with him. But really, all he has to worry about is some chapped lips.

Lambert stood at the threshold of the door at the inn. He was on the outskirts of Oxenfurt, just far enough outside of the city to not smell the scent of ‘foot’ that bled through the streets. It was their agreed upon meeting place, and Lambert could hear the fluttering heart of his companion, her boots pacing around the room back and forth and back again.

He rested his forehead on the door. What am I doing? She’s probably only here so she doesn’t hurt me. She wouldn’t want to be here with me. Hells, I still have necrophage on my boots.

Suddenly, in the midst of Lambert’s moping, the door swung open, causing Lambert to stumble face first towards his companion’s bosum. He caught himself and steadied his hands on her shoulders.

“Quite the entrance as always, Lambert,” she smiled, her blue eyes wide and gleeful in the dim light from the waning fire.

“Gotta keep you on your toes, Essi.” Lambert straightened himself and let his hands fall from her shoulders. They stood there quietly for a beat, just kinda…looking at each other.

“Oh, come here,” Essi surged forward and enveloped her arms around his neck, pulling him into her embrace.

Lambert melted into her, her touch chasing away the things beneath his skin that wound him into a tight ball of nerves. Gods, but she was soft, her skin and her hair and her scent, it soothed him to the core.

Lambert leaned back, nosing along her jaw. Essi giggled, the sound singing through his bones, until hit found himself a hairs’ breath from her lips. He sighed with a smile and made to close the distance between them, but Essi fit her slender finger between their lips.

“Your lips are chapped, darling.”

Lambert scrunched his nose and huffed dejectedly. “You try travelling for weeks on end in the fuckin’ cold-as-an-ice-troll’s-ballsack wind and tell me your lips don’t get a little dry.”

Essi chuckled good-naturedly and grabbed his hands, pulling him into the room with her. “Please. I know well enough that you don’t allow yourself enough love on the Path. Here,” she rummaged around in her pack before finding a small tin. “Beeswax. It’ll melt a bit on your finger, then you can smear it around. It’ll help, and you’ll taste like honey.”

Lambert hummed and crooked his brow, plucking the tin from Essi’s fingers. He twisted off the lid and took a smidge of the thick wax onto his finger, taking a cautionary sniff. Yup, beeswax.

“What,” Essi smirked with her hands on her hips, “don’t trust me?”

Lambert shrugged before sloppily spreading the wax over his lips, feeling it seep into the tender cracks and soothing the wind-worn skin. “Can’t be too careful. Knew someone who thought they had a tin of slick, but ended up rubbing his dong in wraith oil. Shit scarred like nothing else I’ve seen, I swear.”

Essi grimaced. “Ew. Yeah, fair of you to check then. Feeling any better?”

Lambert nodded and put the lid back on before chucking it aside. “Much. Silky soft as a bard’s butt.”

“Good,” Essi grinned and shook her head, wrapping her arms around his neck once more. “Then kiss me.”

Lambert leaned down and pressed his lips softly to Essi’s, tasting her happiness on his tongue. He hummed lightly against her mouth and swayed back and forth, rolling them in a lazy dance as they melted into one another after so long apart.

“So,” Essi whispered, “up to some fun tonight?”

She hooked her finger in the low v of his undershirt and tugged gently, teasing his skin and pulling a gasp from behind his throat. He smirked dangerously and rubbed his nose over the soft slope of her cheek. “With you? Always.”

[sometimesiwrite]

Steady As She Goes

Summary: Lambert begrudgingly insists on escorting Essi through Velen on her way to Novigrad. On their three days' journey, an unexpected bond is formed as the unlikely traveling companions encounter one another in new light. But will they get through unscathed?

Part 1 — Part 2 — Part 3

Dear Lambert, Thank You

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