#eventually we got downright giggly about it

[foxsoulcourt]

drinking up the majesty of these colours + shapes

grateful to share the magic of this place w/2 DeLigHtFuL companions that day : @fuzzballsheltiepants + @justadreamfox (who did the heroic job of driving the whole dang day-into-night)

[tickle-bugs]

Wrestling With Love

Summary: Tahani catches Jason and Eleanor wrestling for the last Hot Pocket and has no idea how to react. Eleanor picks up on her out-of-character awkwardness and decides to help in her own way.

Anon: I love you’re writing! It’s exactly the lightheartedness we need right now! If you’re up for it, could you do one for The Good Place where Eleanor tries to get Tahani to loosen up and let her know that she doesn’t always have to be prim and proper if she doesn’t want to? Growing up in a less than affectionate family, the concept of horseplay and tickling is very foreign to Tahani, and Eleanor is happy to show her that she can be both and elegant lady and a giggling mess whenever she wants

Eleanor skidded into the kitchen, her cactus-print socks slipping frantically across the hardwood. She’d heard the ultimate transgression taking place in her own home, an unfathomable crime that only one man would have the audacity to commit.

“Mendoza.”

“Hi, Eleanor!” Jason waved.

“Unhand the Hot Pocket.” Eleanor pointed an accusatory finger and strode forward. Jason continued to tear open the package. 

“What? Why?”

“Because it’s mine!” 

“But it’s in the kitchen?”

“Exactly. My kitchen. Which means it’s mine.”

“But I don’t see your name on it. Aren’t you supposed to write your name on it?” Jason turned it over in his hands, earnestly searching for Eleanor’s name. She knew he was being genuine, in his sweet, dumb, way, but that was so obviously a challenge. 

“Last chance!” Eleanor made a show of stretching and bouncing around. 

“No.”

“...no?” Eleanor stopped.

“I found it, so it’s mine. Florida rules.” He nodded, as if the rule made sense.

“We’re not in Florida.”

“We’re not?” Jason’s eyes widened and he clutched the Hot Pocket in fear. 

“I—okay. Last last chance. Hand over the Hot Pocket or I’ll be forced to unleash my wrath.” The threat came out more like an elongated sigh as Eleanor pinched the bridge of her nose.

“Let’s wrestle for it! That’s how I used to settle things with Pillboi!”

“Alright, but I have to warn you, I will probably kill you.” Eleanor assumed a vaguely karate-like pose, but it looked more like she had a leg cramp she couldn’t shake off. 

“You may try,” Jason beamed.

“3, 2-”

Eleanor took off, launching herself at Jason with a war cry. He toppled over with an armful of angry, writhing blonde. He maneuvered her beneath him, sprawling over her like a weird throw blanket, and she could feel the air slowly being pushed out of her. A classic move, but no match for an Arizona dirtbag. Eleanor employed her personal favorite technique: poke until the person quits.

She jabbed Jason in the arms and shoulders, delighting in the little grunts of pain he made. One of her pokes caught his ribs and he squeaked, slapping her hand away.

“Oh?” Eleanor smirked, poking him again. A giggle slipped past his lips before he could stop it. 

“Tickling is cheating!” Jason whined, rolling off of her and trying to protect his torso. She followed him, and when a pinch to his side made him laugh outright, she lit up.

“I don’t think so, bud. It’s not my fault you’re ticklish.” She wormed her hands past his arms and wriggled her fingers into his stomach. Jason fell into giggles, kicking his legs, but still held tight to the Hot Pocket. 

That was alright. He’d give it to her eventually. 

“Eleanor!”

“Yes? I’m listening.” She buried her hands under his arms and he squealed, trying to shove her away with one hand. He held the Hot Pocket as far out of her reach as possible, but his arm was shaking, and it was only a matter of time before he handed her the prize. 

“What are you two doing?” Tahani poked her head around the corner before coming to hover in the doorway. 

“I’m absolutely destroying Jason in a tickle fight.” Eleanor grinned down at him, just a smidge drunk with power. 

“Why?” 

“Because I want the last Hot Pocket.” Eleanor furrowed her brow. 

“Couldn’t you talk things out? Reach a diplomatic agreement for both parties?” Tahani flinched when Jason squealed again. Eleanor’s fingers searched for a surrender under his arms, and it was only a matter of time until he gave in. Was the Hot Pocket easily accessible with the way Jason had curled up? Yes, but it was about the moral victory. 

Chidi would be proud. Probably. 

“Tahani, babe, there is no peaceful way to decide who gets the last Hot Pocket. It always ends in blood—or in Jason’s case, laughter.” Eleanor wiggled her fingers in the air over him, giving him another chance to willingly surrender, but he flipped the two of them over and grabbed hold of Eleanor’s knee. 

“Hey! Tahani, hehelp!” 

“Jason, cut it out. Release her at once.” Tahani assumed her ‘stern voice’ and straightened her posture. Jason didn’t even blink in her direction. 

“What’s the magic word?” Jason sang, pinching at Eleanor’s knee like there was no tomorrow. 

“Please?”  Tahani tried. 

“Nope! It’s hot wings.” Jason beamed.

“That’s...two words. It also isn’t much of a password if you just tell me the answer.” Tahani raised an eyebrow. Jason hooked his fingers behind Eleanor’s knee and she kicked, muffling her frantic laughter in her hands. 

“Okay, try and guess the new password.” 

“Is it—Is it hot wings, again?” Tahani chuckled.

“Yep!”

“I’m dying!” Eleanor wheezed, pushing her heels along the floor to scoot away. Hot Pocket forgotten, Jason pulled her back and tickled her stomach, laughing along with her. Jason wiggled his fingers in the air before darting down to squeeze her sides, and growls permeated her next set of giggles at the role-reversal. 

“Do you wanna help?” Jason gently pulled Tahani’s hand until she kneeled next to Eleanor.

“N-No! No helping!” Eleanor pointed a shaky finger at the two of them. Jason rolled his eyes and affixed his hands to her ribs, giggling at the way she would try to curl up. Tahani experimentally ran her nails over Eleanor’s knee and she yelped.

Oh?

Tahani scooted over, brow furrowed in concentration, and hiked Eleanor’s leg into her lap. Her fingers skimmed curiously over the denim, dancing in various swirls and lines to pull the sweetest music from Eleanor. It felt like learning guitar after learning to play piano--you knew all the sounds, but your fingers would trip when met with strings, rather than keys. 

She knew what tickling was, of course, but to enact it? Her only reference points were films and Jason’s guidance. With the way Eleanor was cackling, though, it seemed like she was doing a decent job. 

“Counterattack!” Eleanor squeaked, reaching up to quickly tickle Tahani’s stomach. Tahani made a tiny noise of surprise and flinched away, hands flying to cover her face. When the attack didn’t persist, she slowly peeked through the gaps in her fingers to find Jason and Eleanor staring, wide-eyed. 

“Why are you looking at me like that?” She silently cursed the obvious waver in her voice, but the way her friends were watching her was downright terrifying. She immediately got the sense that no stern voice would get her out of whatever she just stumbled into. 

“My dear, sweet, giraffe. Have you been holding out on me?” Eleanor scooted close with an objectively evil grin. 

“Sorry?”

“You will be.” Eleanor pulled Tahani close, scribbling experimentally at her stomach. Tahani peeped--quite literally peeped--and wrinkled her nose with a smile. 

“For the record, you’re infuriatingly adorable,” Eleanor grinned, wriggling her fingers into Tahani’s sides. She yelped and fell into loud, melodic laughter, eyes wide as if startled by her own volume. Air fled her lungs far faster than she could replenish it, and she snorted around her next batch of giggles. 

“Do that again.” Eleanor’s hands stilled. 

“Absolutely not.”

“Please?” Eleanor looked at her so earnestly that Tahani’s breath caught in her throat. If Kamilah--or worse, her parents--had heard her make a noise like that, she’d be the laughingstock of every event for months afterward. But Eleanor didn’t have the sneer that her family usually wore, only an amused smile and soft, genuine eyes. 

“Even if I wanted to, I can’t just...do it on command.” Tahani averted her eyes, cheeks pink, but she could still feel Eleanor’s piercing gaze on the side of her face. 

“Oh, I can help with that.” Eleanor started up again, much more gentle than she was with Jason, and with each twitch of her fingers she asked an unspoken question. Each pause between scribbles and waves of pokes inquired if Tahani wanted to stop, but...she didn’t. Eleanor’s playful attitude was so contagious that it inspired Tahani to not self-destruct when she snorted again and again, like a giggly, broken record. 

“I wish you’d laugh like this more often,” Eleanor sighed, pained, but she didn’t relent--she just kept giving Tahani little windows to flee. She just gripped Eleanor’s wrists and laughed with reckless abandon. 

“I really shouldn’t--Eleanor!” 

“Why not?”

“I-It isn’t--” Tahani’s voice got stuck on her laughter before her barely-coherent sentence had the chance to leave her mouth. Every time she tried to speak, more giggles and titters floated out of her in place of words. 

“I have no idea what you were gonna say, but the fact that you couldn’t finish means it didn’t matter. Besides, there’s no need for, like, a presidential speech. Normal people laugh, Tahani.”

“I’m not normal!” That wasn’t all that she’d intended to say, but all her coherent thoughts were fighting and losing against another round of snort-filled laughter. 

“Are you kidding? The only thing not normal about you is how cute your laugh is! You sound like a princess! Ignoring how angry that makes me, you are as normal as anyone else.” Eleanor squeezed her sides and Tahani squealed, then groaned. Eleanor couldn’t help but laugh with her. 

“Noooo,” Tahani whined, hiding her face in her hands. 

“Yes. I bet even the Queen of England has snorted once. You can be all snooty-” she dragged out the ‘o’ while poking Tahani’s stomach- “and have fun.”

“I promise that there’s nothing unladylike about making your friends laugh. It’s the only skill on my resume, which makes me a professional, which also means that you have to listen to me.” Eleanor tugged Tahani’s hands away from her face and brushed her hair away from her eyes. 

“Repeat after me. I, Tahani Al-Jamil…” Eleanor raised her right hand. Tahani just watched her with a silly smile until Eleanor rolled her eyes and raised Tahani’s hand for her. 

“I, Tahani Al-Jamil….”

“....have the world’s cutest laugh.” Eleanor beamed. 

“I am not saying that.” Tahani tried to cover her bashfulness with an indignant huff, but the grin on her face undermined her attempts. 

“Well, it’ll be a lot harder to say laughing, but I respect your desire for a challenge.” Eleanor nestled her fingers just behind Tahani’s ears, taking her by surprise. Before she could even hope to fortify her composure, she crumpled into Eleanor’s arms. High-pitched, screamy giggles erupted from her poorly covered face as she tried to turtle her way to safety. 

“Alright, my laugh is c-cute! Cut it out already!” She swatted in the general vicinity of Eleanor’s hands but she missed every time. Eleanor slowed down, smoothing and tucking Tahani’s hair with light fingers just to hear a few more whispers of laughter.

The crinkle of a wrapper shattered the mirth-charged air, and two pairs of eyes turned to watch Jason dispose of the Hot Pocket packaging. The empty Hot Pocket packaging, to be exact. 

“I was hungry.” Jason shrugged, completely oblivious to the murderous look in Eleanor’s eyes. Tahani could feel the simmering rage emanating from her, and if it wasn’t for the familiar way that Eleanor’s fingers were twitching, Tahani would have feared for Jason’s life.

She still did, but it was less likely that Eleanor would have the patience to kill him with laughter versus, well, a stranglehold. 

“Tahani--”

“On it.” Tahani helped Eleanor to her feet. Jason’s eyes widened and he bolted, already giggling, with his friends hot on his heels.

[sixpenceee]

Slices of Life

A real Salvia experience by u/SmokinTuna where he saw the “reality” of the universe. Edited by u/sagittariuscraig

The following happened to me seven years ago while I was a sophomore in college, and it was my first experience with any drug other than weed (great choice, right?). There are many things in this report that are downright stupid and reckless, ranging from lack of research to reckless dosing. As I said, this was seven years ago, and I have learned how to be responsible with drugs now. However, at the time of the report, I was a fool. In fact, this experience is the main reason why I'm extremely cautious and heavily research any drug I am interested in taking to this day.

I first heard about Salvia a year before this experience from a friend who lived down the hall from me in my dorm. He described it as a legal psychedelic (it's legal in Oregon and available in almost any smoke shop) that was super fun and a lot like weed (those who know how wrong this are probably rolling their eyes about now). I tried it a few times at parties in a social setting, usually in a circle of people (again, stupid, I know). I never experienced any effects other than slight spinning and loss of balance, mainly due to the fact that we didn't know how to smoke it properly (we used shitty small pipes), didn't hold in the hits long enough, and didn't really know what to look for.

Fast-forward, one year later: I was at the local smoke shop in my town, buying a new glass bong (my first "real" piece). Since I was out of weed, I decided to pick up a gram pack of 20x salvia as well, since I wanted to test this new masterpiece out, although I had not the slightest clue what 20x stood for at the time. Remember, at this point, I thought it was kind of like weed but made you dizzy/giggly for a few minutes.

I tried it a few times in the proceeding week but didn't experience any effects other than what I described above, likely due to my failure to hold in the hits and my poor bowl-lighting technique. I still thought this was "fun." Eventually, I had most of the pack of salvia emptied, with enough for one large bowl left. I decided the following day would be a fun time to try it out and got some rest.

I woke up early the next day and went on a bike ride with my friends, who for the sake of anonymity I'll refer to simply as S, T, and R. We got back, and after relaxing for a bit, I decided to finish off the bag of salvia once and for all (what a waste of money this was, I thought). With the exception of R, none of my friends were interested, so he and I stepped out into the garage, and I sat down on the stairs and get everything ready. Next to the stairs is an old wooden fence lined with saplings and one big tree. Behind it is my neighbor's field, which had a bunch of little kids in it, running around and screaming playfully.

I packed the bowl (a big bowl piece) to the brim with the remaining salvia 20x extract. My friend R was too scared to try it since he'd heard from others about its potential to create nightmarish effects ("Yeah, right," I thought), so he agreed to sit and watch me. Here goes nothing!

I leaned down and torched the bowl as hard as I could. The bong filled up with way more smoke than my old pipe ever could, and I torched about half the bowl in a single hit. Since this was the last of it, I decided to hold the hit as long as I could in order to maximize the effects (which is why it finally worked). After about 35 seconds, I exhaled and noticed I was feeling weird as fuck. So, like any sane 18-year-old who had no idea what they were doing, I torched the rest of the bowl in one gigantic hit and cleared the chamber, then held it as long as I could. After I exhaled for the second time, R asked me how I was feeling, or if it was bunk again. I tried to ask him how come he was talking so weird but all that came out was slurs. At this point my vision started "chopping," like everything around me was being rendered by a flip book. I finally managed to say, "Oh, shit, I'm gonna need a minute." R could tell something was up, so like a good friend, he went inside to watch TV while I proceeded to lose my mind.

The last thing I remember of this reality was R walking past me, back into the house. At that point, everything was just starting. As I said before, everything in my field of vision slowed down and was being chopped up. I moved my hand in front of my face and could see that it wasn't actually moving in front of my face, but that it was actually being drawn across my field of vision like an animation or a flip book. This is hard to describe. The best I can say is: imagine it as a flip book. With each frame, the hand moved a little bit more across my vision, but it wasn't actually "moving," it was being rendered. As soon as I realized this I understood that I was watching reality being created instant by instant, and it isn't a constant stream of conscious like we perceive. Weird, I know (imagine how I felt). As soon as this realization came upon me, I heard an incredibly high-pitched squeal and experienced the feeling of impending doom, like something of epic importance was happening. It was at this point that I completely forgot I had smoked salvia at all. Everything that happened after this was legitimately happening (or so I thought), and my reality was falling to pieces.

I closed my eyes, thinking this was too much to handle. As soon as I did, I was in another world. The prior two minutes of my life were laid out in front of me like snapshots, with each picture representing a single instant of time. The pictures were being flipped to demonstrate the effect I mentioned above (the flip book), and show how reality was being created. The pictures then split apart and I was shown what existed "behind" existence, what is actually happening behind the curtain of our day to day lives. At this point, I had no memory of my life at all.

As soon as the pictures split, I was sucked into the space between them, which I was told (by a disembodied female voice I could not place), that this was the place between moments. We perceive life as a continuous stream, but in actuality, reality is completely destroyed and re-created between each instant. In other words, each instant is a page of the flip book, and the previous page is destroyed and replaced with a new one. These "pages" were being flipped by an enormous wheel, which was the source of the noise I heard earlier. I could feel this wheel pressing up against me, threatening to destroy me and replace the current "me" with the "me" from the next moment. Naturally, I was horrified, and for some reason filled with déjà vu. I knew I’d been there before (which was weird, because this was the first time I "really" smoked salvia). I cannot stress how powerful and massive this wheel seemed. It was the source of reality as we knew it, responsible for creating the universe around us. And it was touching me.

The voice then told me that this wheel and this space is the only thing that "truly" exists. Reality as we know it is merely a side effect of the action of this wheel. My consciousness has existed in this space for all of eternity, being ground against this wheel, spinning with it and helping it create reality. I somehow "escaped" it years ago, which coincided with my physical birth, but now it somehow got me back where I belonged. I felt utterly hopeless. My entire life had been a temporary escape into a dream in order to cope with being merely a cog in the wheel (both literally and metaphorically), and now that that illusion was broken I was trapped here again, and the entire life I lived was merely a dream. All of my friends and family, as well as any experiences I remembered, never really happened, and were just a cheap trick I used to distract myself. This... was the real existence.

The feminine voice told me that everyone around me are her children, and our purpose was merely to spin with this wheel and create reality. I looked around, confused, and realized then that I was surrounded by trillions of other little people like me, all of them trapped and spinning in order to create reality. They all screamed at me, "Help us, help us spin. Stay with us. Now that you are here, you cannot leave. You cannot leave. You cannot leave. YOU CANNOT LEAVE. YOU WILL NEVER LEAVE. YOU ARE US AND WE ARE YOU. IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN THIS WAY, AND IT ALWAYS WILL." These were her children, and I was her child as well. I had escaped, but now I was back.

Naturally, this scared the shit out of me.

I was in Hell. I was always in Hell, I just forgot.

I was trapped there for what felt like an eternity. Time had no meaning in that place; each second felt like countless years. Slowly, I began to forget my life on Earth (it was a "dream" as far as I was concerned, and it felt like I was forgetting it in the same way you forget a dream minutes after waking). I was dysphoric and terrified, and resigned myself to spinning for the rest of eternity. After what felt like thousands of years (who knows? In eternity, nothing means anything. 1% of infinity is still infinity), I remembered that I had somehow "escaped" into the dream world (normal, Earth reality) in the past, and maybe I could do it again. I didn’t think I could get back into my old life, but maybe I could escape, and as the woman told me, be "born" again. Anything, even starting over in another life, would be better than that hell.

I managed to turn my head to look at the wheel head-on, desperately trying to see how I escaped in the past. I managed to turn my head so that I was looking at the wheel from the side (the flat side, so that it resembled a spinning two-dimensional circle). The wheel was divided up into slices like a pizza, or the wheel on Wheel of Fortune (the pieces were broad at the top and narrowed closer to the center). Each slice was a different color, and the edges were incredibly jagged and multi-hued. There were an infinite amount of slices and the wheel was spinning infinitely fast. This made perfect sense in salvia-space. In the face of infinite time, after all, what is infinite space? Each slice whizzed by my face, so closely that I could feel them pulling my face and grinding it down to my bones with an effect that felt almost electric. This felt pleasant compared to having my body constantly torn to pieces for all eternity on the other side of the wheel.

As each slice rolled by, I stared intently at them. Slowly I began to realize what I was seeing (the slices were moving so quickly that it took a while). Each slice was a moment in time belonging to someone in the dream world (Earth reality), and maybe I could use them to escape!

As soon as I thought this, the female voice spoke to me again. She told me that escape was useless, and that even if I managed to escape into reality again, my return there was inevitable (either through death, or by being stupid enough to smoke salvia again). I began to desperately claw at the wheel, trying to squeeze myself into one of the slices, in the hope of inhabiting one of the bodies I saw represented. However, the wheel was spinning too fast, and when I touched it, it felt like electricity coursing through my body. Very painful.

I fought through the pain and clawed at the wheel more and more until, very briefly, the wheel appeared to stutter and slow down! Hope surged through me and I began to claw harder, which caused the electric grinding feeling to increase, but I didn’t care. I pulled and pulled until the wheel slowed down enough for me to look at each slice individually. As I pressed each slice I temporarily "became" the person in the moment the slice belonged to. I became an alcoholic old man sitting on a couch watching TV, wishing his children were still around. I became a young girl, talking on the phone with her friends. I became a father, screaming at his children, looking at his kids cowering in the corner of his kitchen. I became a junkie in an alleyway, waiting for someone to walk by so that I could rob them.

Each slice belonged to a person, and as I moved my hand up and down the slice I went through their life. The top of the slice (the broad part near the edge) was the beginning of that person's consciousness, and the tip in the center of the wheel was the end, their death. Moving left to right on the slice represented the different realities that person existed in based on the decisions they made. This is why the slice was broad at the top and thin at the bottom. At the beginning of one's life, they have an endless amount of paths to choose, and as they get older (and closer to death), there are fewer and fewer paths to take that can steer them away.

I realized that each one of these people had smoked salvia at some point in their life, which is what "opened their slice" to me being able to enter it. In salvia space, you have access to the infinite timelines of others who have smoked it.

For a brief second, I could see into the slice where I came from. I saw myself sitting on the stoop in my garage, sitting there with my head down and my eyes closed. Everything was distorted, though, as if I was viewing it through the window. I touched the slice and briefly became myself again. I opened my eyes and looked around, feeling incredible joy to be back here. I instantly felt my hands slip as the wheel sped back up, and I was torn back into salvia space, and away from my body. I desperately clawed at the wheel but it was moving too quickly. I would have to wait another eternity for the wheel to revolve again so that I could reach my slice. I debated trying to jump into another person's slice to get out of that hell, but I didn’t know if it would work, or if it did, if I would effectively kill that person and take over their body.

At that point, after experiencing so many other realities, I was having trouble remembering which one was mine. For those brief times, I fully believed myself to be the people in those moments. Who was I to say that the one I remember, of me on the porch in my garage, was really the reality I came from, or simply the one I touched last and remembered best? "Fuck it," I thought. "Anything is better than this."

I waited until the wheel came around again, and I could see my slice coming up. I clawed at the wheel again, once more experiencing the electric, bone drilling feeling, until it slowed down. I grabbed my slice at the edges and thrust myself headfirst into it as hard as I could, desperately trying to get back to where I had been. As soon as my head made it through the slice, everything exploded. My skin was peeled off of me into countless dimensions, and my body was torn and twisted into shreds. I fell into blackness. Surrounding me were pieces of the slice I tried to climb into. Each one was a porthole (like on a submarine) into reality, but at different times of "my" life. There was no order; the windows were scattered around me. I could see a moment from when I was in middle school, practicing the saxophone. I could see another of me sitting on a couch with my sister, arguing about something stupid. I saw several more that I did not recognize, with people I didn't know.

I assumed these were from my future (or from the future of whichever person was being displayed, at least). I didn’t even know if this was me anymore, or if this was just the slice I chose. I was afraid to touch these, as I didn’t know if it would cause me to experience the moment as the slices had done earlier. I also worried it might toss me in at that point of time (further forward or back in time from where I had been). Then I finally saw something that looked familiar: I was sitting in the garage, loading up the bowl, and R was talking to me. The perspective was weird, though, and it seemed like I was looking up at myself from thirty feet away, as if I was deep in the concrete floor.

I grabbed the window by the sides and again thrust myself forward as hard as I could. As soon as my feet made it through, I was back in my body (well, in someone's body, I don’t know if it was mine). At that point, I still had no memories. I was an empty shell, in an unfamiliar body, in an unfamiliar place. Slowly my recollection started to return to me. I remembered events from my childhood and my family. I remembered I was a college student. I came out to do something... what, though?

I looked around and saw the bong at my feet, and suddenly it all came back to me.

"I smoked salvia!" I cried out. "That’s what caused all of this?!"

I looked behind me and discovered I could still see the tear in space where I had pulled myself through. I heard children - her children - laughing and chanting. I looked at the trees around me and could see them frantically working and creating everything around me. The trees stretched out and were trying to push me into the hole I came from. I instantly got up and ran to the other side of the garage, away from the trees and the rip I'd created.

I turned around and looked through the door into the house. Everything was still distorted and spinning, and I could still hear the wheel's high-pitched shriek, emanating from some unknown space. Slowly the world became less choppy. I looked at the tear I had come through and saw millions of tiny children's hands reach through the other side, laughing hysterically the entire time, as if they found it hilarious that I had escaped. Did they know something I didn’t?

They pulled the rip closed, and it slowly melted back together as they chanted, “See you soon! See you soon!” As soon as the hole closed I could no longer hear the scream of the wheel. I heard the female's voice one last time, however. "Don’t worry," it said. "You’ll be back soon enough, my child. Enjoy your time."

To this day, this is still one of the most traumatic experiences I have ever gone through. Immediately after I came down, I ran into the house and locked my bedroom door. Everything felt incredibly fake. I was shown how everything was made and how empty and pointless it all is. I had trouble talking to my roommates for a while because I saw them as philosophical zombies, rather than as real people. From my newfound perspective, they were nothing but constructs, empty shells pretending to be people. Perhaps they even were part of the wheel. After all, I was the only person in this world. Everything else was created by the wheel.

The most significant issue I had after this was that for a while afterward, I was convinced that I wasn’t back in the "right" body. I was certain that my present body had existed normally until its former occupant decided to smoke salvia, at which point one of the wheel's children - my consciousness - hopped in while he was absent. I only have the memories I do because they are stored in this body. If I had grabbed onto another slice, I would have been thrown into that body (or shell) instead, and I would have slowly remembered all of "their" memories. In short, I hijacked this body, and its prior resident is now trapped in that nightmarish realm. I know this sounds insane (and I realize that now), but it felt so incredibly real that I still have my doubts every now and then.

Now, eight years later, I feel comfortable enough to talk about this experience. I have PTSD-like nightmares once every few months, where I find myself back in that hellish place, and I always wake up in a sweat and run across the room to get away before I realize where I am and that it was a dream.

I bought more salvia off of the internet (plain leaf and 5x, nothing stronger) in order to conquer my fear of the substance (cue laughter). I now smoke plain leaf rarely and 5x even less often, and achieve an altered state of mind, but nothing of the magnitude I experienced on 20x. I am working up the courage to try and go back there, so that I can see what really happened, but I know it will be a long time before I am comfortable enough to go that far.

I’ve grown comfortable in this body the past few years, and I can't help but wonder... what will happen if I can’t make it back?

[vee-angel]

Sharking Sherry (Chapter 1, repost)

So I have, at last, managed to get the Introduction to the fifth and final member of the Pervert Pentet. I’m pretty excited about that because it means the first part of this series is done. I actually wanted to write Sherry’s story earlier, but I put it off a bit after I decided that it would be written in first person from the perspective of someone who’s a much bigger anime/hentai fan than me. It’s always tricky trying to realistically write a character who knows much more than you about something.

This is probably my most wholesome story so far, so there’s not really any content warnings needed, but as a bonus, there is a bit of a flash-forward to the point where all five of the character’s stories converge.

________________________________

My name is Sherry Sugisaki, I’m twenty-two years old, single, blood type B, and as of today, I’m the official club historian for the Pervert Pentet!

The Pervert Pentet is a club that me and four of my best friends formed so that we could all get together and just be ourselves without other people calling us weirdos or sluts. Well, except for Piper. She calls everybody a slut, but trust me, compared to the other things that come out of her mouth, “slut” is a compliment!

Piper is kind of our leader. She’s the first girl I ever met who was an even bigger perv than me! She’s so smart it’s a little scary, and she always speaks her mind. The only problem is that her mind is always in the gutter!

Nancy is the muscle of the group. She’s the tall athletic type, and way prettier than she realizes. She can be a little intimidating, but I think deep down she has a good heart. I haven’t really gotten close to her yet, and Piper says I probably shouldn’t try to. Nancy says that she doesn’t want to hang out with me because she doesn’t like Asian people (except she said it in a way that wasn’t quite so polite), but I think maybe she just had a hard life and she’s not ready to trust people, yet. And she’s always hanging out with Teira anyway.

Speaking of Teira, she’s this rich, famous artist from Europe. Nancy went to one of her art performances a while back and Teira saw something special in her. Ever since then, Nancy has kinda been Teira’s sidekick. Teira can be a little scary too, but in a different way. While Nancy seems tough, Teira’s… well, creepy. She never smiles, never seems to have an opinion about anything, and she kinda has this icy-cold “I’d like to see you chopped into neat little pieces” vibe. In fact, the only time I’ve ever seen her look excited is when I introduced her to guro porn.

Bailee is the last girl who joined our club. She’s usually kinda dumb, exept sometimes she’s not? We’re all still trying to figure out exactly what her deal is. She’s sooo much fun to hang out with, though! And she’s actually into cute things, like me! As much as I love Piper, some of the things she’s into gross me out. But with Bailee, we can talk about cute boys, and go clothes shopping! Plus, she looks like the big-boobed girls in hentai, but in real life!

But you’ll get to know them later. They say to write what you know about, so I guess I’ll start by telling you about myself!

I grew up in the U.S. but my father is from Japan. My mom is from here, but ethnically, she’s half European and half Brazilian, which I think is why I have a bigger butt than most Japanese girls. My dad was the typical Asian father, which means that he worked all the time to provide for me and my mom, but I never really got to spend much time with him. I guess that’s why I started getting into Japanese culture at a young age. I was into all the normal stuff like Pokemon and Sailor Moon and Hello Kitty, so it was really exciting when I was little and my mom got me a subscription to this really cool anime streaming service!

But even though my mom really liked Japanese history and culture, I don’t think she realized just quite how naughty some parts of it can be. While other pre-teen girls dreamed of a storybook romance with a handsome man who buys them pretty dresses and mansions, I thought up pranks to play on my romantic rivals when we were all crowded into a little house along with our collective boyfriend! When I finally learned what other little girls fantasized about, it just seemed so boring! And lonely, too. I mean, sure, being in a harem seems like it might get a little crazy sometimes, but it’s also exciting. And besides, when things get really tough the girls always put their differences aside to solve problems as a family!

I guess watching all those shows gave me a sense of humor that wasn’t exactly “politically correct.” But honestly, it’s funny when busty girls get their boobs yanked out, or when lecherous milf-types molest shy, blushing lolis. Oh! And when bad-ass fighter girls get their clothes all ripped up during a battle and they suddenly realize that everybody can see that they’re not wearing panties and then they’re all like “Eep! Don’t look!!” That’s the best!

Okay, okay, maaaaaaybe it’s not just that I think it’s funny. Maybe it turns me on a little bit, too. But can you blame me? I mean, when you see a pretty girl on the street, don’t you just want to pull her dress up or yank her boobs out?? Of course you do! Everybody does, they just don’t talk about it. The only difference is that in my case I actually do it!

I’m getting ahead of myself again. I should back up. So when I was in middle school, my parents let me get a smart phone with internet access. And let me tell you, if you think anime is naughty, you haven’t seen hentai! I mean, there’s stuff that’s even too dirty for me! But eventually I came across one kind of video that made me obsessed. And for once, it wasn’t animated at all.

The first time I saw it, I was confused. It just seemed like a guy with a camera-phone following this cute girl in a skirt. But then this guy came out of nowhere and pulled up her skirt and yanked down her panties! She made this cute little “Eeeee!” noise while the guy ran off. It was so cute, and so funny, and so super hot! I figured that video had to be one of a kind, but boy was I wrong!

Apparently it’s called “sharking.” I never quite found a satisfactory explanation for the name, but it started in Japan (just like all the best pervy stuff!), and the idea is to run up to a girl and expose her while somebody else films and puts it online for everyone to enjoy! There’s all kinds of varieties. Top-sharking works best when you find a girl in a tube-top and you can pull her boobs out. Bottom-sharking works best for girls in a short skirt; and if you’re really lucky, you might find a girl who isn’t wearing panties! There’s even cosplay-sharking! That’s when you steal all of a girl’s clothes and run off with them, but you leave her a super cute, slutty outfit that she has to wear if she doesn’t want to walk home naked. Personally, just regular full-sharking is my favorite. That’s when you strip a girl naked and run off with her clothes while the camera guy follows her while she figures out what to do. It’s so exciting! I mean, at first the girl thinks it’s just going to be a regular boring old day, but then she gets to be part of this awesome sexy adventure where she’s naked in public! And nobody can even get upset at her because it’s not even her fault! Everybody wins!

I should know, I’m proud to say that I’m one of the few girls who’s been on both sides. You see, after I graduated high school, I got my parents to finally agree to pay for me to take a year off to visit Japan! It was everything I ever dreamed! I was surrounded by signs displaying happy anime characters, I got to ride public transit with groups of cute, giggly school girls and handsome, studious schoolboys. There were night-clubs with lolita-goths and J-pop was playing everywhere!

The only thing that could have made it better was if I could have had a romantic encounter with a cute boy. I think everyone who visits a foreign country kinda wishes that they could have a special lover to think back on fondly when they’re old and grey. Unfortunately, no matter how many blind corners I hurried around, I never accidentally collided with my true love. Not even when I had toast in my mouth!

I figured maybe I still dressed too much like a kid, and boys were scared that I was under-aged. So I decided to show off my assets! While I was far from flat-chested in America, in Japan my full C-cup breasts made me downright busty. And the Brazilian butt I inherited from mom put me way ahead of at least ninety percent of the other girls in Japan. So I got some new button up shirts that were small enough to hug my curves, and I left a few buttons undone. I also bought new mini-skirts short enough to ensure my panties would be visible with even the slightest breeze. Everybody in Japan is really into panties.

Unfortunately, most of the male attention I got from the new wardrobe was from middle-aged men who took advantage of crowded trains to touch my butt. But I wasn’t about to get discouraged! I mean, it’s not ideal, but if I’m getting attention, than I must be on the right track!

And then one day it happened! I was in a public park a short walk from where I was staying. I had my headphones on, listening to my Japanese language-learning app when this guy came out of nowhere and yanked my little school-girl skirt up to my waist and then pulled my white panties down to my knees!

I always thought that if I ever got sharked myself, that I’d do something really sexy, like wink or do a little pose or something. But honestly, the whole thing happened really fast so I hardly had a chance to react. And I didn’t even see where the camera guy was. I was just sort of… frozen. I just stood there with my panties halfway down my legs as the guy in the hoodie ran off.

A part of me thought that I wished I’d been more prepared for it, but on the other hand, that’s part of the fun! Unlike most Japanese girls, I keep everything totally shaved down there, so they definitely got a shot of my naked pussy. And there were going to put it online! How exciting is that! Once I pulled my panties back up they immediately got soaked. I felt like I’d just won the best prize ever! Now any-time somebody is looking at sharking videos on the internet, there would be a chance that they’d get to see me! I just hoped that the camera guy was good enough that I’d be popular.

I spent the next week looking at sharking videos more than I ever had before, but sadly, I still couldn’t find mine! I knew it would take time, but I just couldn’t wait. Part of me hoped that it’d go viral. Maybe it’d become the most popular sharking video of all time, and I’d get to be the poster-girl for the whole fetish! I’d be so famous that when people saw me in the street they’d yank up my dress and take pictures of my exposed body while I pretended to blush. I mean, I knew it wasn’t likely, but a girl can dream!

After a week of looking at every sharking related site I could I eventually came across this post written in Japanese that looked like it was a local casting call for a girl to be in a video! They must have been a really bad writer, because I could hardly understand it and my Japanese is perfect! I mean, I watched One Punch Man without subtitles and totally understood every word…. well most of them… I mean, at least half…

…

Let’s get one thing straight! I’m a Japanese girl so I obviously speak Japanese! They must have been speaking a weird dialect and that’s why I didn’t understand them that well, okay?!?

Anyway, the post said they wanted a girl to be in a sharking video, and I knew I wanted to be that girl. In all the videos I saw, it was always boys running up and exposing unsuspecting women. I’ve never seen girl-on-girl sharking! What a concept!

After a few messages back and forth, I ended up meeting them at this cute cafe by the beach. That’s when I got really excited! Bikini sharking is one of the best ways to get a girl totally naked in public! I’ve even seen it done where a guy gets two girls tops and bottoms off at once!

I didn’t catch the camera guy’s name, but the one who did most of the talking was named Kaito. I started asking them if there were any special techniques I should know so I could undo a girl’s bikini faster, but they seemed confused. I don’t know how, but there must have been a miscommunication. It seemed like they wanted to me to go somewhere private and stage a fake sharking. They said they were going to make sure to do it where no one would see me and they’d give me my clothes back at the end!

What a cheap trick! I told them that there’s no way. Either they have to shark me for real or I was going home!

I was pretty mad, so I laid out my terms and made sure they knew that there would be no negotiation! One: They had to strip me completely naked! Boobs, ass, pussy, it all had to be on display. Two: They had to do it someplace where lots of people would see. Three: sometimes in the really good sharking videos the guys would spread a girls legs or pull her butt-cheeks apart while the camera guy runs in close, that way everybody on the internet gets a good look at her vagina and butthole. I told them they had to do that, too! And four: Under no circumstances were they allowed to give me my clothes back or let me have anything to cover myself with afterwards.

If I was getting to be part of planning a sharking video, I was going to make sure it was the best one ever! There was no way I was going home unless it was completely naked!

Kaito and his friend whispered to each other for a minute, and then they asked me if I’d be willing to ditch some of my clothes in advance so that they could get me naked faster. Finally! They were saying something that made sense! And honestly, they had a point. I’m ashamed to admit that before that day I used to dress in a terribly un-sharkable way. Ever since then, the only question I ask when choosing an outfit was “How easy would it be for someone to get me naked in public?”

Anyway, I slipped away into a public bathroom to ditch my shirt, bra, and underwear. So now I was just wearing the zippered hoodie I put on when I thought I was going to get to shark a girl, and my mini-skirt. I told the guys that I was going to try to find a place off to the side of the boardwalk, far enough so that nobody could intervene, but close enough that everybody could still see my naked body.

I waited there for about five minutes, and I was starting to think they had gotten scared off, but then I saw the one with the camera sneaking up around the corner of a nearby building. I tried not to look directly at him, but I still wanted my front-side facing the camera.

My heart started racing as I heard Kaito coming up behind me! They must have been discussing technique, because he grabbed the bottom of my skirt and yanked it up until it gathered along with the hem of my hoodie. In an expertly practiced maneuver that seemed almost like a matador with a cape, he swept both garments up over my head and then down off my arms!

Suddenly, I was standing in the middle of a wide open public space in the middle of the day and I was completely naked! The sun seemed like a spotlight that shone down to reveal every private inch of my body.

Kaito tossed my hoodie and skirt and then grabbed my arms to bend me over a nearby bench. That’s when I saw the camera guy running in close while I felt his hands on my butt-cheeks. He reached down to the very bottom and spread everything open wide. The camera guy got in so close he must have been within a foot or two of my most private areas! I sure was glad that I’d shaved that morning; I mean, with the close-up he got of my pussy and asshole, everyone on the internet would have seen if I had even the tiniest bit of stubble.

I’d almost forgot! This was going on the internet! My heart was racing and I wasn’t sure if it was from fear or excitement. As scary as the whole thing was, I was still getting really wet really fast! I hoped that that camera could pick that up so that everyone would see how much girls like this kind of thing! I sort of moaned and wiggled a little bit, but then the two of them ran off. Thankfully they remembered to grab my clothes on the way, so that I wouldn’t have the option to cover myself!

I stood up to see two middle-aged ladies running up to me and yelling something at the men. I must have looked freaked out because they seemed a bit confused and frantic, like they wanted to help me but didn’t know how. Honestly, I was a little freaked out, too, but it was in a good way! Like when you ride a roller-coaster. Like, it’s really exciting and so scary that you scream but it’s also really fun! When I think back on it, I’m pretty sure I actually did scream when he first came up behind me and pulled all my clothes off.

The shorter lady had a jacked that she was unbuttoning, I realized that she was going to try to cover me up! What a prude! She must have just been jealous that a pretty young thing like me was getting to walk around naked in public and show off the goods when she was never brave enough to do anything like that!

I decided I was going to rush off down the boardwalk before she got a chance. I was still super nervous and excited. My heart felt like it was pounding in my throat and I was out of breath from the thrill of it all.

I had the temptation to cover myself with my hands, but I half-resisted. I must have looked kinda shy because I kept sort of covering my pussy, and then half-covering my boobs, and then I put both hands behind me to cover my butt. So anyone who kept looking for more than a second would have seen everything. And there were people everywhere, so even if I wanted to cover myself (which I totally didn’t), there was no way I could have.

I kinda figured that everyone would be staring at me and taking pictures and commenting on my body; I hoped that by the time I made it a hundred meters that I’d have a whole crowd of men around me, but honestly, no one said a thing! Some people glanced, and now and then someone would stare for a few seconds, but the majority of people averted their eyes and just pretended I wasn’t there!

They seemed almost… scared to look at me. This was even better than I could have imagined! I mean, at first I was a little disappointed that people weren’t excited to take in the sight of my naked, young body, but then I realized something! It wasn’t just fun and sexy to be naked in public, it also felt kinda… powerful!

Once I realized that, I stopped acting shy. I stopped trying to cover myself at all. In fact, I slowed down my stride and put on a cocky grin. By the time I reached the end of the boardwalk I was staring people right in the eye, but nobody had the guts to look back at me.

It was about a ten-minute walk back to where I was staying, but I decided I was going to make it take fifteen! There was even a spot where a dozen people were waiting for a train, and I decided to stand in front of all of them and check my phone for a good two minutes! Fortunately, I had the foresight to stick my phone, wallet, and apartment key in my sock before I had those guys steal all my clothes. I made sure to bend down in front of everybody when I took my phone out so they could have a chance to admire my naked butt.

I hoped that at least someone noticed how wet this was making me! I mean, I was starting to literally drip down the inside of my leg! I figured I’d better make my way home before my socks end up getting soaked.

When I got home I retrieved my apartment key from my sock and saw my neighbor coming home with a bag of groceries. I smiled and gave him a big wave, but he acted like he couldn’t see me. I unlocked my door and went inside.

The first thing I did was down a can of green tea, as fun as the whole walk was, my mouth was dry as a desert. As much as I enjoyed myself, it was nerve-wracking. The whole time I was sort of afraid the police were going to show up any minute, but that never happened.

All in all, the whole thing was way different than I expected. I guess that since I’m a perv, I expected that everyone else would be one, too. But everybody else was so well behaved. So I guess that makes me special!

Realizing that I was a pervert who walks around naked in public and gets off on exposing myself to strangers was the best moment of my life. It made me feel like I could do things that regular people couldn’t. Kaito sent me the video of my full-sharking the next day. Apparently, they had followed me almost all the way home without me even realizing it! They sure got some amazing shots and I’m proud to say that it has over a hundred-thousand views and counting.

I never found out the name of the guy who pulled my panties down that first day in the park. But a couple years later when I met Piper she’d tracked down the original video of me that he made. I posted a thank-you message in the comments telling him how grateful I was that he chose me, and how he changed my life for the better.

Ya know, it’s funny. Of all the girls that I’ve exposed in public and put online since that day, not a single one has posted a ‘thank-you’ message to me under their videos. Then again, I don’t do this for thanks, I do it for the knowledge that I’m helping others live the life that every girl wants! I’m helping them to be the perverts that deep down they all definitely wish they could be!

[ourimpavidheroine]

since you posted a playlist how about which songs your characters (OC and canon) would karaoke to? (adults obvs)

Oh, I had to go and make myself a cup of coffee before I tackled this one! I love it when you all send me these fun asks, I really do.

I mean, we’re assuming that for most of them it’s either tipsy or downright drunk Karaoke, right? Or at least I am assuming, based on my own experiences.

Also, this is AU obviously, which I normally don’t do but fuck it, I’m doing it with this one.

So lessee…a bar in Republic City one late night…

Wu would croon along to My Way in the most off-key caterwauling way ever. He would not give a shit at all that people were cringing and ordering new drinks because he is a Hou-Ting, thank you very much, and he expects that people will put up with him at all times, including when he is assaulting their ears.

I’ve loved, I’ve laughed and criedI’ve had my fill, my share of losingAnd now, as tears subside, I find it all so amusingTo think I did all thatAnd may I say, not in a shy wayOh, no, oh, no, not me, I did it my way

Not in a shy way indeed.

Mako would down his fire whiskey in one gulp, stand up, and do a surprisingly bluesy version of Smokestack Lightnin’. He would do it with feeling. The room would get instantly hotter.

Whoa-oh, stop your trainLet a poor boy rideWhy don’t ya hear me cryin’?Whoo-hooo, whoo-hoooWhooo

He might unconsciously grind his hips a little. Nuo would fan herself and take him up a few notches on her Exceptions List. 

Qi would do a smoldering whisper-sing to My Heart Belongs To Daddy and Mako would slam three shots in succession while glaring furiously at the little stage area. There would be lots of whistles of appreciation and a man who showed a little too much appreciation would get such a look from Mako that he would scuttle back over to the other side of the room.

Though I’m in love, I’m not aboveA date with a duke or a caddieIt’s just a pose, ‘cause my baby knowsThat my heart belongs to daddy

When people notice that the two of them have disappeared after Qi’s done and ask Wu about it Wu would merely sip at his drink and blandly say he was sure they’d be back soon. They would slink back in eventually, looking slightly worse for the wear. Wu is completely unruffled by this.

Nuo belts out Respect, of course. She does quite a bit of strutting during the bridge, which gets appreciative cheers from the crowd. Wing joyfully sings along with her in the audience. 

I ain’t gonna do you wrong while you’re goneAin’t gonna do you wrong ‘cause I don’t wanna All I’m askin' Is for a little respect when you come home Baby when you get home 

When she’s done she gets a huge round of applause and he yells louder for her than anyone else and kisses her when she sits back down in his lap, laughing.

Wing croons out This I Promise You and he only has eyes for Nuo. He’s got the best singing voice out of all of them and he sings it with such love and tenderness that there are handkerchiefs whipped out by many, including Wu.

I’ve loved you forever,In lifetimes beforeAnd I promise you never…Will you hurt anymoreI give you my wordI give you my heart This is a battle we’ve wonAnd with this vow,Forever has now begun…

When he’s done he sits back down next to her and she wraps her arms around him and if her eyes are a little wet everyone pretends they don’t notice.

Wei sings You Shook Me All Night Long, changing the gender, of course. He dances around a lot. Does air guitar, goes without saying. He’s clearly having such a good time that everyone sings along to the chorus. 

I’m working double time on the seduction lineHe’s one of a kind he’s just mine all mineWanted no applause it’s just another courseMade a meal outta meAnd come back for moreHad to cool me down to take another roundNow I’m back in the ring to take another swingCause the walls were shaking the earth was quakingMy mind was achingAnd we were making it

Sadly, there is no Sitiak there to be impressed with his performance.

Korra’s next and she screeches out Rebel Girl with more feeling than skill. Asami blushes. Korra gets so enthusiastic that she accidentally kicks over a speaker and it makes terrible feedback, but she just keeps going.

That girl thinks she’s the queen of the neighborhoodI got news for you, she is!They say she’s a dyke, but I knowShe is my best friend, yeah

After she’s done Asami is still blushing a little but is also clearly pleased. Everyone tries to get her to get up and sing next but she turns them down. Wei orders her another drink.

Opal busts into Shake It Off, awkward dancing and all. She’s a little nervous and a little drunk and she gets a little giggly. Her brothers all shout encouragement. Bolin leaps up and points at her and informs everyone in the bar, a huge smile on his face, that she’s his wife.

Cause the players gonna play, play, playAnd the haters gonna hate, hate, hateBaby I’m just gonna shake, shake, shakeShake it off. Shake it offHeartbreakers gonna break, break, breakAnd the fakers gonna fake, fake, fakeBaby I’m just gonna shake, shake, shakeShake it off, Shake it off

When she’s done, Bolin tells her she’s the best singer in the whole world. He means it, too.

It’s Bolin’s turn and he says “I’m singing this for my brother and my wife and kids, my Mama used to sing this to Mako and me when we were little,” and shocks everyone by singing Bridge Over Troubled Water. The entire bar goes silent. Opal cries all over everything. Mako clears his throat a lot and refuses to make eye contact with anyone.

When you’re down and outWhen you’re on the streetWhen evening falls so hardI will comfort you I’ll take your part, oh, when darkness comesAnd pain is all aroundLike a bridge over troubled waterI will lay me downLike a bridge over troubled waterI will lay me down

After he’s done he gets the most heartfelt applause of the night. There are no dry eyes.

Baatar Jr stands up and says something about not making people cry, and he launches into the most soulful rendition of Too Hard To Handle ever. He bumps and grinds, grinning the entire time at Ikki, who whoops and laughs her appreciation. By the end the rest of the bar has gotten into it as well, whistling through their teeth and stomping their feet.

Boys are things that come by the dozenThat ain’t nothin’ but drugstore lovin’Hey little thing let me light your candle‘Cause mama I’m sure hard to handle nowYes, I am

“I never knew your brother had it in him,” Korra whispers to Opal and Opal snorts and says, “Please, he’s a Beifong.” He sits back down next to Ikki and looks very pleased with himself. She kisses him until someone yells, “Get a room!”

Huan stands up, his eyes blinking rapidly, grabs the mic and says, “They don’t have the one I want to sing,” and then launches into an a cappella version of Be Prepared.

Be prepared! that’s the boy scouts’ solemn creed,Be prepared! and be clean in word and deed.Don’t solicit for your sister, that’s not nice,Unless you get a good percentage of her price.

When he’s done his siblings, Wu and Ikki are laughing wildly. Everyone else in the bar looks like they are not quite sure what to do.

Ikki gets up there, winks, and launches into Pony. The bar goes absolutely fucking bananas. She sells the shit out of it, too, getting off the stage and slinking around the audience. She even gives Nuo a little bit of a lap dance. (Nuo immediately bumps someone else off her Exceptions List and adds Ikki.)

If we’re gonna get nasty, babyFirst we’ll show and tellTill I reach your ponytailLurk all over and through you babyUntil we reach the streamYou’ll be on my jockey team

When’s she’s done she primly takes her seat and pretends to be surprised at all of the fuss. “I fucking love you,” Baatar says into her ear. “I know,” she replies, and looks very smug.

Yumi’s up next and since she can’t sing her way out of a paper bag she talks her way through Rock Lobster. Korra leaps up onto the stage with her and does all of the background OOs and SCOOBYDOOs and AAAAAAHs, joined by Ikki, Bolin and Wei. Most of the audience obligingly goes down down down with the music, and by the end most of the bar is surfing along with the music as well.

Motion in the ocean (Ooh ah)His air hose broke (Hoo ah)Lots of trouble (Ooh ah)Lots of bubble (Hoo ah)He was in a jam (Ooh ah)He’s in a giant clam! (Hoo ah)

She brings the bar to its feet.

Asami is finally convinced to get up there. (Mostly because Wei’s been getting her liquored up.) She sings along to She Works Hard For The Money. It takes her a little while to get into it, but everyone is very encouraging and she loosens up and has some fun by the end. Every time she sings “She works hard for the money,” Korra belts out, “So hard for it, honey!” in return, grinning.

She works hard for the moneySo hard for it, honeyShe works hard for the moneySo you better treat her right

She gets a large round of applause when she’s done and she sits back down. “Okay, that was pretty fun,” she says to Korra, and Korra just kisses her.

Meelo’s the last one of their group, and he rips into Revolution with some feeling.

You say you want a revolutionWell, you knowWe all want to change the worldYou tell me that it’s evolutionWell, you knowWe all want to change the worldBut when you talk about destructionDon’t you know that you can count me out

When he’s done, Korra slings and arm around him and hugs him tightly. “I’ll talk to him,” she says, but Meelo just shrugs. “It won’t do any good.”

They aren’t done: Ikki and Nuo and Korra and Wei do an impromptu version of Lady Marmalade which ends up in Wei falling off the stage and Wu and Yumi sing Over The Rainbow together and it is so bad it’s actually sort of good (only not really) and everyone gets into some Bohemian Rhapsody (while letting Wing carry all of the actual tricky singing parts) and it’s a good thing that everyone has taken cabs to the bar because no one should be driving home at that point.

[vee-angel]

Sharking Sherry (Chapter 1)

So I have, at last, managed to get the Introduction to the fifth and final member of the Pervert Pentet. I’m pretty excited about that because it means the first part of this series is done. I actually wanted to write Sherry’s story earlier, but I put it off a bit after I decided that it would be written in first person from the perspective of someone who’s a much bigger anime/hentai fan than me. It’s always tricky trying to realistically write a character who knows much more than you about something. 

This is probably my most wholesome story so far, so there’s not really any content warnings needed, but as a bonus, there is a bit of a flash-forward to the point where all five of the character’s stories converge. 

________________________________

My name is Sherry Sugisaki, I’m twenty-two years old, single, blood type B, and as of today, I’m the official club historian for the Pervert Pentet!

The Pervert Pentet is a club that me and four of my best friends formed so that we could all get together and just be ourselves without other people calling us weirdos or sluts. Well, except for Piper. She calls everybody a slut, but trust me, compared to the other things that come out of her mouth, “slut” is a compliment!

Piper is kind of our leader. She’s the first girl I ever met who was an even bigger perv than me! She’s so smart it’s a little scary, and she always speaks her mind. The only problem is that her mind is always in the gutter!

Nancy is the muscle of the group. She’s the tall athletic type, and way prettier than she realizes. She can be a little intimidating, but I think deep down she has a good heart. I haven’t really gotten close to her yet, and Piper says I probably shouldn’t try to. Nancy says that she doesn’t want to hang out with me because she doesn’t like Asian people (except she said it in a way that wasn’t quite so polite), but I think maybe she just had a hard life and she’s not ready to trust people, yet. And she’s always hanging out with Teira anyway.

Speaking of Teira, she’s this rich, famous artist from Europe. Nancy went to one of her art performances a while back and Teira saw something special in her. Ever since then, Nancy has kinda been Teira’s sidekick. Teira can be a little scary too, but in a different way. While Nancy seems tough, Teira’s… well, creepy. She never smiles, never seems to have an opinion about anything, and she kinda has this icy-cold “I’d like to see you chopped into neat little pieces” vibe. In fact, the only time I’ve ever seen her look excited is when I introduced her to guro porn.

Bailee is the last girl who joined our club. She’s usually kinda dumb, exept sometimes she’s not? We’re all still trying to figure out exactly what her deal is. She’s sooo much fun to hang out with, though! And she’s actually into cute things, like me! As much as I love Piper, some of the things she’s into gross me out. But with Bailee, we can talk about cute boys, and go clothes shopping! Plus, she looks like the big-boobed girls in hentai, but in real life!

But you’ll get to know them later. They say to write what you know about, so I guess I’ll start by telling you about myself!

I grew up in the U.S. but my father is from Japan. My mom is from here, but ethnically, she’s half European and half Brazilian, which I think is why I have a bigger butt than most Japanese girls. My dad was the typical Asian father, which means that he worked all the time to provide for me and my mom, but I never really got to spend much time with him. I guess that’s why I started getting into Japanese culture at a young age. I was into all the normal stuff like Pokemon and Sailor Moon and Hello Kitty, so it was really exciting when I was little and my mom got me a subscription to this really cool anime streaming service!

But even though my mom really liked Japanese history and culture, I don’t think she realized just quite how naughty some parts of it can be. While other pre-teen girls dreamed of a storybook romance with a handsome man who buys them pretty dresses and mansions, I thought up pranks to play on my romantic rivals when we were all crowded into a little house along with our collective boyfriend! When I finally learned what other little girls fantasized about, it just seemed so boring! And lonely, too. I mean, sure, being in a harem seems like it might get a little crazy sometimes, but it’s also exciting. And besides, when things get really tough the girls always put their differences aside to solve problems as a family!

I guess watching all those shows gave me a sense of humor that wasn’t exactly “politically correct.” But honestly, it’s funny when busty girls get their boobs yanked out, or when lecherous milf-types molest shy, blushing lolis. Oh! And when bad-ass fighter girls get their clothes all ripped up during a battle and they suddenly realize that everybody can see that they’re not wearing panties and then they’re all like “Eep! Don’t look!!” That’s the best!

Okay, okay, maaaaaaybe it’s not just that I think it’s funny. Maybe it turns me on a little bit, too. But can you blame me? I mean, when you see a pretty girl on the street, don’t you just want to pull her dress up or yank her boobs out?? Of course you do! Everybody does, they just don’t talk about it. The only difference is that in my case I actually do it!

I’m getting ahead of myself again. I should back up. So when I was in middle school, my parents let me get a smart phone with internet access. And let me tell you, if you think anime is naughty, you haven’t seen hentai! I mean, there’s stuff that’s even too dirty for me! But eventually I came across one kind of video that made me obsessed. And for once, it wasn’t animated at all.

The first time I saw it, I was confused. It just seemed like a guy with a camera-phone following this cute girl in a skirt. But then this guy came out of nowhere and pulled up her skirt and yanked down her panties! She made this cute little “Eeeee!” noise while the guy ran off. It was so cute, and so funny, and so super hot! I figured that video had to be one of a kind, but boy was I wrong!

Apparently it’s called “sharking.” I never quite found a satisfactory explanation for the name, but it started in Japan (just like all the best pervy stuff!), and the idea is to run up to a girl and expose her while somebody else films and puts it online for everyone to enjoy! There’s all kinds of varieties. Top-sharking works best when you find a girl in a tube-top and you can pull her boobs out. Bottom-sharking works best for girls in a short skirt; and if you’re really lucky, you might find a girl who isn’t wearing panties! There’s even cosplay-sharking! That’s when you steal all of a girl’s clothes and run off with them, but you leave her a super cute, slutty outfit that she has to wear if she doesn’t want to walk home naked. Personally, just regular full-sharking is my favorite. That’s when you strip a girl naked and run off with her clothes while the camera guy follows her while she figures out what to do. It’s so exciting! I mean, at first the girl thinks it’s just going to be a regular boring old day, but then she gets to be part of this awesome sexy adventure where she’s naked in public! And nobody can even get upset at her because it’s not even her fault! Everybody wins!

I should know, I’m proud to say that I’m one of the few girls who’s been on both sides. You see, after I graduated high school, I got my parents to finally agree to pay for me to take a year off to visit Japan! It was everything I ever dreamed! I was surrounded by signs displaying happy anime characters, I got to ride public transit with groups of cute, giggly school girls and handsome, studious schoolboys. There were night-clubs with lolita-goths and J-pop was playing everywhere!

The only thing that could have made it better was if I could have had a romantic encounter with a cute boy. I think everyone who visits a foreign country kinda wishes that they could have a special lover to think back on fondly when they’re old and grey. Unfortunately, no matter how many blind corners I hurried around, I never accidentally collided with my true love. Not even when I had toast in my mouth!

I figured maybe I still dressed too much like a kid, and boys were scared that I was under-aged. So I decided to show off my assets! While I was far from flat-chested in America, in Japan my full C-cup breasts made me downright busty. And the Brazilian butt I inherited from mom put me way ahead of at least ninety percent of the other girls in Japan. So I got some new button up shirts that were small enough to hug my curves, and I left a few buttons undone. I also bought new mini-skirts short enough to ensure my panties would be visible with even the slightest breeze. Everybody in Japan is really into panties.

Unfortunately, most of the male attention I got from the new wardrobe was from middle-aged men who took advantage of crowded trains to touch my butt. But I wasn’t about to get discouraged! I mean, it’s not ideal, but if I’m getting attention, than I must be on the right track!

And then one day it happened! I was in a public park a short walk from where I was staying. I had my headphones on, listening to my Japanese language-learning app when this guy came out of nowhere and yanked my little school-girl skirt up to my waist and then pulled my white panties down to my knees!

I always thought that if I ever got sharked myself, that I’d do something really sexy, like wink or do a little pose or something. But honestly, the whole thing happened really fast so I hardly had a chance to react. And I didn’t even see where the camera guy was. I was just sort of… frozen. I just stood there with my panties halfway down my legs as the guy in the hoodie ran off.

A part of me thought that I wished I’d been more prepared for it, but on the other hand, that’s part of the fun! Unlike most Japanese girls, I keep everything totally shaved down there, so they definitely got a shot of my naked pussy. And there were going to put it online! How exciting is that! Once I pulled my panties back up they immediately got soaked. I felt like I’d just won the best prize ever! Now any-time somebody is looking at sharking videos on the internet, there would be a chance that they’d get to see me! I just hoped that the camera guy was good enough that I’d be popular.

I spent the next week looking at sharking videos more than I ever had before, but sadly, I still couldn’t find mine! I knew it would take time, but I just couldn’t wait. Part of me hoped that it’d go viral. Maybe it’d become the most popular sharking video of all time, and I’d get to be the poster-girl for the whole fetish! I’d be so famous that when people saw me in the street they’d yank up my dress and take pictures of my exposed body while I pretended to blush. I mean, I knew it wasn’t likely, but a girl can dream!

After a week of looking at every sharking related site I could I eventually came across this post written in Japanese that looked like it was a local casting call for a girl to be in a video! They must have been a really bad writer, because I could hardly understand it and my Japanese is perfect! I mean, I watched One Punch Man without subtitles and totally understood every word…. well most of them… I mean, at least half…

…

Let’s get one thing straight! I’m a Japanese girl so I obviously speak Japanese! They must have been speaking a weird dialect and that’s why I didn’t understand them that well, okay?!?

Anyway, the post said they wanted a girl to be in a sharking video, and I knew I wanted to be that girl. In all the videos I saw, it was always boys running up and exposing unsuspecting women. I’ve never seen girl-on-girl sharking! What a concept!

After a few messages back and forth, I ended up meeting them at this cute cafe by the beach. That’s when I got really excited! Bikini sharking is one of the best ways to get a girl totally naked in public! I’ve even seen it done where a guy gets two girls tops and bottoms off at once!

I didn’t catch the camera guy’s name, but the one who did most of the talking was named Kaito. I started asking them if there were any special techniques I should know so I could undo a girl’s bikini faster, but they seemed confused. I don’t know how, but there must have been a miscommunication. It seemed like they wanted to me to go somewhere private and stage a fake sharking. They said they were going to make sure to do it where no one would see me and they’d give me my clothes back at the end!

What a cheap trick! I told them that there’s no way. Either they have to shark me for real or I was going home!

I was pretty mad, so I laid out my terms and made sure they knew that there would be no negotiation! One: They had to strip me completely naked! Boobs, ass, pussy, it all had to be on display. Two: They had to do it someplace where lots of people would see. Three: sometimes in the really good sharking videos the guys would spread a girls legs or pull her butt-cheeks apart while the camera guy runs in close, that way everybody on the internet gets a good look at her vagina and butthole. I told them they had to do that, too! And four: Under no circumstances were they allowed to give me my clothes back or let me have anything to cover myself with afterwards.

If I was getting to be part of planning a sharking video, I was going to make sure it was the best one ever! There was no way I was going home unless it was completely naked!

Kaito and his friend whispered to each other for a minute, and then they asked me if I’d be willing to ditch some of my clothes in advance so that they could get me naked faster. Finally! They were saying something that made sense! And honestly, they had a point. I’m ashamed to admit that before that day I used to dress in a terribly un-sharkable way. Ever since then, the only question I ask when choosing an outfit was “How easy would it be for someone to get me naked in public?”

Anyway, I slipped away into a public bathroom to ditch my shirt, bra, and underwear. So now I was just wearing the zippered hoodie I put on when I thought I was going to get to shark a girl, and my mini-skirt. I told the guys that I was going to try to find a place off to the side of the boardwalk, far enough so that nobody could intervene, but close enough that everybody could still see my naked body.

I waited there for about five minutes, and I was starting to think they had gotten scared off, but then I saw the one with the camera sneaking up around the corner of a nearby building. I tried not to look directly at him, but I still wanted my front-side facing the camera.

My heart started racing as I heard Kaito coming up behind me! They must have been discussing technique, because he grabbed the bottom of my skirt and yanked it up until it gathered along with the hem of my hoodie. In an expertly practiced maneuver that seemed almost like a matador with a cape, he swept both garments up over my head and then down off my arms!

Suddenly, I was standing in the middle of a wide open public space in the middle of the day and I was completely naked! The sun seemed like a spotlight that shone down to reveal every private inch of my body.

Kaito tossed my hoodie and skirt and then grabbed my arms to bend me over a nearby bench. That’s when I saw the camera guy running in close while I felt his hands on my butt-cheeks. He reached down to the very bottom and spread everything open wide. The camera guy got in so close he must have been within a foot or two of my most private areas! I sure was glad that I’d shaved that morning; I mean, with the close-up he got of my pussy and asshole, everyone on the internet would have seen if I had even the tiniest bit of stubble.

I’d almost forgot! This was going on the internet! My heart was racing and I wasn’t sure if it was from fear or excitement. As scary as the whole thing was, I was still getting really wet really fast! I hoped that that camera could pick that up so that everyone would see how much girls like this kind of thing! I sort of moaned and wiggled a little bit, but then the two of them ran off. Thankfully they remembered to grab my clothes on the way, so that I wouldn’t have the option to cover myself!

I stood up to see two middle-aged ladies running up to me and yelling something at the men. I must have looked freaked out because they seemed a bit confused and frantic, like they wanted to help me but didn’t know how. Honestly, I was a little freaked out, too, but it was in a good way! Like when you ride a roller-coaster. Like, it’s really exciting and so scary that you scream but it’s also really fun! When I think back on it, I’m pretty sure I actually did scream when he first came up behind me and pulled all my clothes off.

The shorter lady had a jacked that she was unbuttoning, I realized that she was going to try to cover me up! What a prude! She must have just been jealous that a pretty young thing like me was getting to walk around naked in public and show off the goods when she was never brave enough to do anything like that!

I decided I was going to rush off down the boardwalk before she got a chance. I was still super nervous and excited. My heart felt like it was pounding in my throat and I was out of breath from the thrill of it all.

I had the temptation to cover myself with my hands, but I half-resisted. I must have looked kinda shy because I kept sort of covering my pussy, and then half-covering my boobs, and then I put both hands behind me to cover my butt. So anyone who kept looking for more than a second would have seen everything. And there were people everywhere, so even if I wanted to cover myself (which I totally didn’t), there was no way I could have.

I kinda figured that everyone would be staring at me and taking pictures and commenting on my body; I hoped that by the time I made it a hundred meters that I’d have a whole crowd of men around me, but honestly, no one said a thing! Some people glanced, and now and then someone would stare for a few seconds, but the majority of people averted their eyes and just pretended I wasn’t there!

They seemed almost… scared to look at me. This was even better than I could have imagined! I mean, at first I was a little disappointed that people weren’t excited to take in the sight of my naked, young body, but then I realized something! It wasn’t just fun and sexy to be naked in public, it also felt kinda… powerful!

Once I realized that, I stopped acting shy. I stopped trying to cover myself at all. In fact, I slowed down my stride and put on a cocky grin. By the time I reached the end of the boardwalk I was staring people right in the eye, but nobody had the guts to look back at me.

It was about a ten-minute walk back to where I was staying, but I decided I was going to make it take fifteen! There was even a spot where a dozen people were waiting for a train, and I decided to stand in front of all of them and check my phone for a good two minutes! Fortunately, I had the foresight to stick my phone, wallet, and apartment key in my sock before I had those guys steal all my clothes. I made sure to bend down in front of everybody when I took my phone out so they could have a chance to admire my naked butt.

I hoped that at least someone noticed how wet this was making me! I mean, I was starting to literally drip down the inside of my leg! I figured I’d better make my way home before my socks end up getting soaked.

When I got home I retrieved my apartment key from my sock and saw my neighbor coming home with a bag of groceries. I smiled and gave him a big wave, but he acted like he couldn’t see me. I unlocked my door and went inside.

The first thing I did was down a can of green tea, as fun as the whole walk was, my mouth was dry as a desert. As much as I enjoyed myself, it was nerve-wracking. The whole time I was sort of afraid the police were going to show up any minute, but that never happened.

All in all, the whole thing was way different than I expected. I guess that since I’m a perv, I expected that everyone else would be one, too. But everybody else was so well behaved. So I guess that makes me special!

Realizing that I was a pervert who walks around naked in public and gets off on exposing myself to strangers was the best moment of my life. It made me feel like I could do things that regular people couldn’t. Kaito sent me the video of my full-sharking the next day. Apparently, they had followed me almost all the way home without me even realizing it! They sure got some amazing shots and I’m proud to say that it has over a hundred-thousand views and counting.

I never found out the name of the guy who pulled my panties down that first day in the park. But a couple years later when I met Piper she’d tracked down the original video of me that he made. I posted a thank-you message in the comments telling him how grateful I was that he chose me, and how he changed my life for the better.

Ya know, it’s funny. Of all the girls that I’ve exposed in public and put online since that day, not a single one has posted a ‘thank-you’ message to me under their videos. Then again, I don’t do this for thanks, I do it for the knowledge that I’m helping others live the life that every girl wants! I’m helping them to be the perverts that deep down they all definitely wish they could be!