#everythting. i guess.

[hopefullyababe]

i haeve a quiestion;

aWHY. is does snake deos is is does LOOK. l i k ee. AMONGUD

[justsomeoneunordinary]

tfatws finale rant

i refuse to tag this cause i don't want any discourse, i just wanna rant cause i'm pissed. if you haven't watched it yet or liked the ending, then scroll past this and don't start any discourse - i'm allowed to have my own opinion

well, that was one of the most disappointing endings ever. like, the show wasn't doing well already, but they somehow did manage to make it worse wtf. the only ending that's worse is the endgame one and that only cause endgame was the finale for the og6 and there was no hope for fixing that since that was their last time. but wow, even the wandavision finale is less bad than wtf this was.

first of all, that suit is absolutely horrible. an eye-sore. a huge no-go. and it's so disappointing cause the mcu actually managed well in the outfit departement for their super suits but here they said, let's do it exactly like the comics???? bitch, that works in the comics but not in live action version wtf, mackie is way too handsome to wear this atrocity, i'm so sorry for this.

don't like the new wings either, but that's a personal thing. sorry, but it's just a tad bit too high-tech and not enough bird. hate the new noise too. but at least redwing is back. missed the bird roomba

where was sam in this episode??? sorry, there was no sam wilson, that was steve rogers wearing sam's face. i wanted to watch the sam wilson show and not the "steve rogers 2.0 with his best friend who's gotten way too much screen time" show. they really said sam whomst? and slapped steve's character on him wtf i hate it here

i can't believe they gave walker a redemption arc. THEY GAVE WALKER A REDEMPTION ARC WHILE KARLI AND THE OTHER FLAG SMASHERS WHO FOUGHT FOR WHAT WAS RIGHT HAD TO DIE! and that even tho, EVEN THO, he works with madame hydra!!! what the flying fuck??? and all that while olivia is still at his side and supporting him??? welcome to the daily dose of your pro america pro capitalism propaganda i guess

lmao, sam talks with the senator a lil bit on live tv and ta-da!! everythting the flag smahsers fought for is accomplished now :D ARE YOU SHITTING ME

sharon!! I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY MADE HER THE POWER BROKER OMG THAT IS SUCH BULLSHIT WTF. i'm not even that much of a sharon fan but god am i angry on behalf of her character and her fans. IT MAKES LITERALLY NO SENSE TO HER CHARACTER! the comics have enough villains, they literally don't need to use one of the most important characters of the cap franchise for that what the fucking fuck

did i mention how ugly sam's new suit is? cause damn is it fucking ugly, i'm so sorry mr mackie that they did this to your handsome face

the isiah part???? no??? not good?? like, at all??? i saw someone say the government should've apologized to isiah first and foremost instead of sharon, but i disagree cause there's no fucking way the government will acknowledge what they did to him and the others. the moment they found out he's alive, they'd just kill him. the only way it'd work is if those files that talk abt what happened got released to the public

also, fuck, sam's suit is ugly

but that exhibit is still not good. like, it doesn't erase what happened to him. it doesn't make it better either. and isiah said himself he couldn't give a damn abt cap but suddenly he's so happy for sam? after everything??? hm, sounds like pro america propaganda to me

carl lumbly was amazing ofc and my eyes did get a bit wet ngl, his performance was incredible every single time in this show, but that doesn't change that his part was badly written in the end

wtf why has bucky more character development than sam in this entire show, they clearly favored him, i fucking hate it here. not only did they never fully flesh out sam's personality, but also did they make him steve 2.0 wow wtf

even walker bas more character development than sam????? what the shit??????

god that suit is ugly

also, i hate that sam is cap, even tho i knew it would happen. wish he had destroyed that damn shield. sorry, but at the end of the day my hatred for america is way stronger than my love for a fictional character. as a non-american i hate that stupid stars and stripes bullshit with a passion and i hate that they put a character i genuinely like in this position

now i have to watch lovely sam wilson being the face and rep of fucking shithole america fuck that shit fuck that patriotism fuck that shield and suit fuck america

if a person with the american flag as outfit and the alias captain america came here, it wouldn't matter the gender or the skin color, i'd expect them to bomb us either way

and don't fucking @ me for that, fuck you, i'm allowed to hate the cap america symbol, the us fucking bombed my country so my anger is more than justified

sam's speeches were straight up bad. bad, bad, bad and sooo corny. like, cringe-corny. the whole episode was just cringe

the delacroix ending was cute tho, liked that

the suit is one ugly fucker

just. wow. bad!!!

god, i'm still so angry. i was prepared for disappointment but wow i did not expect to be this disappointed

idk how long i'll keep up with the mcu if this is the shit we gotta deal with

[cbocstar]

hidden thoughts i guess you can say?

Lately, I’ve just been doing a lot of researching trying to figure out what’s going on with my body, and trying to figure out if there’s a name or just trying to find something that can give me a clue on what my chronic pain is exactly. Not really in terms of like a self-diagnosis or some sort. I just want to know what i might be up against.  I just feel so hopeless about life right now.  Whenever this pain strikes I just I can’t help but go to those thoughts that are very alarming and warning signs i guess? Idk I just I feel like Why do I even bother existing since I just feel like I’m not doing anything that is impacting anyone or I just feel like I’m not good enough. After my breakup with Craig and just everythting I am just battling a lot of self hatred with myself and the aftermath of the damaged I’ve been left with. I just I don’t even want anyone to deal with me. LIke this health I am in is such a terrible chore and a huge burden. LIKE i already felt like a burden but now i feel even more like a burden. And I I just after doing research with my condition its like been 2 years now and the pains just getting worse. So it’s like with age its going to just keep getting worse so why why should i even keep living then? And my medication has warning signs of it being opioid addiction? and liver damage in the long run? SO like I took like 3 bottles already the past 3 months so now i probably damaged my body to just quiet the pain. because my body cant handle codeine anymore bc its not strong enough. And I I just I dont know how much longer I can handle this.  And i feel like I’m not even improving on my art. Like its so mediocre and average. I just I just feeel like I’m just a a waste of space. 

and I cant let my job know of my condition because i dont want to get fired. Because i”m now taking care of my mom and me because she’s retired and she’s depending on me. and shes been always at me for wanting m eto get a full time job. and its stressfull bc i dont even have time for myslef anymore now. but like at the same time I like my job. I feel important it makes me feel important but then at times I just feel like i’m not doing anything right either.  i just I just really hate myself . Like I really really hate myself. 

I just feel so alone in this pain. I miss feeling independent. I miss being able to open a door or pushing a door or carrying groceries without fearing of consequences in the evening if it might triggger a pain attack. 

I saw the doctor tooo and she told me she’s concerned and doesnt understand why my pain keeps coming back and how it should be gone by now. And i’m just like “IVE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU THIS. but thanks for finally understanding my concerns!!! lolol 

so she told me she wants me to do a kidney puncture test and then get a CTC scan because she thinks its not just my sternum that is damaged but also my ribs so its like LOL lovely LOL. 

and i dont even know when I’ll even be able to take the test since my schedule for work is giving me no time to even have a life LOL  I just its exhausting because I feel so alone and I feel like social media is also ruining my sanity. because it makes me feel even more lonely than ever. 

[wolvesfromsaturn]

that fun feeling when you see people having fun without you and that they probably don’t care a damn second about you since months while your fantastic abandonment issues are here reminding you of every people that left you in your life and you just feel clingy and annoying and stupid

[coffin-flop]

I went through my tags for my dad and retagged everythting that happened after his death as dead dad stuff so i could watch my journey i guess but now I’m sad. I always do this to myself