#exhaustedfander speaks

[exhaustedfander]

Idk if this is kind of a dumb idea, but imagine Patton at first thinking he just really likes the color yellow. It’s a happy, cheerful color, and he always does his best to be a happy, cheerful side so, for him, it makes sense that whenever he’s around Janus he feels real happy! Janus might wear a lot of other yellow garments when not in his usual attire, some more casual-wear, and whatnot. So as Patton continues to spend more and more time with Janus, he’s still convinced the joy he feels around him is in association with the color.

But eventually, reality strikes him. Patton doesn’t love the color yellow; he loves Janus.

[exhaustedfander]

It’s in my username, after all

[mimssides]

Words are hard and there are only so many Ways to misinterpret a Hug: Part 10

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___

Logan was back in his room and walked up to his bedroom. Pleasantly surprised, he found Remus sitting on his bed, eyes droopy and smile wide as he saw him enter. For a second Logan was going to inform Remus that they were going to do the next day but decided against it. The side needed his sleep and he was not going to get it if he would bring this up right now.

“I brushed my teeth,” Remus said with a huge smile.

Logan clicked his tongue and nodded in with a sense of pride shining through his movements.

“That is very good, Remus,” Logan told him and walked up to the bed sitting down on one end as Remus observed closely despite his sleepiness. “I will get ready for bed myself and join you now. Is that alright with you?”

Remus nodded and kept eyeing Logen. He got up, loosened his tie and laid it orderly on his dresser. Then he got out of his shoes, placed them neatly next to the dresser, pulled his shirt over his head, folded it and put it next to the tie, loosened his belt and did the same with his pants. Remus could not keep himself from watching him undress and move so casually and yet professionally. It was like magic to Remus and he hoped that it would never stop. That he could just keep looking at Logan with this empty head and peaceful feeling in his chest.

But it didn’t last, as Logan put on his long-sleeved navy pyjamas and then walked back to his bed. Remus just smiled until Logan cleared his throat and Remus finally caught on to something in Logan’s demeanour that resembled discomfort. With a frown he tilted his head and motioned Logan to tell him what was up. There came another throat clear before Logan finally settled on an answer.

“Which side do you prefer to sleep on?”

Remus frowned more. This didn’t seem like the question he wanted to ask nor the question he was so nervous about. Which meant that Remus was now very curious what Logan was afraid off and let him wake up considerably.

Not quite as energetic as usually but much more forceful than previously today Remus said: “I don’t know yet! I first need to have you on the bed as well, so I can see how you fit best in my arms.”

Remus had assumed that his proposal would get a reaction out of Remus. He hadn’t assumed that his eyes would widen in surprise and his hands fidget at the suggestion. It was not that he was uncomfortable though. No, the idea didn’t repulse him but threw him completely into a loop. And Remus did not enjoy watching that. So, he skidded back on the bed and vividly patted to the spot next to him for Logan to sit down on.

Hesitantly, Logan followed and sat down on the bed after he had switched the big light off. Expectantly Remus watched him next take off his glasses and put them on the nightstand before he cleared his throat anew and tried to ask something.

He didn’t get the words out, as Remus put his arms over his chest and pulled him down on the pillows. Possessively, he draped his right leg over Logan’s and pressed himself against Logan’s side. That cuddly attack got a laugh out of Logan and Remus happily pulled him even closer.

Logan moved a little bit around and turned off the lamp on the nightstand before he let himself completely relax in Remus’s embrace and cover them with his comforter. Moments passed and Logan was very aware of the fact that Remus’s fingers were tracing lines between his soft chest and his round belly. He liked the feeling but it also made him aware how big he was and how much place he took of the bed. He didn’t want Remus to feel squished or uncomfortable next to him.

“Please inform me if you are uncomfortable lying beside me or if I accidentally squish you,” Logan eventually settled on whispering.

He didn’t expect the laugher tickling his neck and instinctively felt his hand tightening on the small of Remus’s back before he could stop himself from doing so.

“Oh, Logie,” Remus slurred and brought his mouth close to Logan’s ear, “you’re not too fat. You're soft and warm and very, very comfortable to cuddle with. You're not smashing me like a tomato, not that I could burst like one anyway. So, it wouldn’t be fun, ya know? Bursting I mean.”

Remus waited. Gradually, Logan relaxed. His shoulders stopped being tense and he began to let his hands wander over Remus’s back until one rested on his neck and the other in Remus’s hair. Softly he scratched the skin and Remus began to drift off with a loopy grin. Logan’s heartbeat was soothing. Everything about this was soothing. Being able to hold Logan was wonderful. Having him holding him back was breath-taking.

It was almost too good to be true, Remus thought letting out a little wince. Reflexively he buried his head on Logan’s soft chest and felt the logical trait shift beneath him. Despite his tired state sleep hadn’t taken Remus yet and he felt how Logan lifted his head in the darkness as if he wanted to look at him.

There was a pause, Remus felt how Logan’s chest was rising as if he was taking a deep breath before he would start to speak. His impression had been right.

“Is this an activity you and Janus have performed together in the past?”

Logan’s voice was even. Almost professional. But Remus felt something uneasy wafting off his Logan and adjusted his head a little on Logan’s chest. He furrowed his brows in the dark and started thinking about the question. Not if it was true or not, he knew that. But why Logan would ask such a thing.

“Nah, Jan is not the cuddly type,” Remus mumbled and let his left hand rest on Logan’s chest close to his own face. “What brings the question? You’re not one to pry.”

Logan swallowed and Remus lifted his head as if he was watching him.

“I did not mean to overstep any boundaries. I apolo-”

“What is it teach? You’re not asking what you want to ask and the thought’s making you restless.”

Another pause before Logan put one hand on Remus’s and took another deep breath.

“Virgil hinted at the fact that you and Janus were an “item” figuratively speaking. Romantically, I assumed. And you and I sleeping like this could possibly worsen your relationship with him, which would not be beneficial for any of us.”

“… Lo, I wish I had a thing with Janus but the guy is also Denial, so that’s not something you need to worry about.”

Remus’s voice grew mellower and Logan felt how he slowly put his head on his chest again. He was really falling asleep now but Logan’s questions weren’t answered quite yet and he really needed an answer right now.

“But Virgil…” he tried quietly and heard Remus softly giggle before he felt his breath against his skin.

“It’s sweet that he worries,” Remus slurred the words. “He always worried about us. I liked it, even though it was annoying sometimes. Don’t think though that he still worries about us like that. Not anymore… But I’m not against trying and getting on their good side again, Lo… You’ll be able to pull it off with me, I think… You’re just right for them and me… It’ll be fine, my bug…”

The stream of words stopped tripling from Remus’s mouth. Logan’s heart was pounding wildly as Remus had switched into a peaceful slumber. Now there was nothing for Logan to do but lay here and hope that somehow, he would be able to fall asleep. His thoughts were racing but not clear enough to notice how the weight of Remus on him slowly lulled him into sleep and let him forget about the feelings blooming within him for the next few hours.

___

@varthandi

@sammy-is-obsessed / @exhaustedfander

@alexisrealgay

@softie-sushi

@wolfs-feder

@just-a-neoclassical-painting

@winter-jay-official

@a-ghostlight-for-roman

@mychemically-imbalanced-romance

@whattheremus

@sarenicide  

Tagged for this fic:

@frawkeye

@nightweirdo

[exhaustedfander]

The entire fandom really said “Strawberry Roman is absolutely perfect,” huh?

[exhaustedfander]

Janus’s sweater look oh my GOSH

[exhaustedfander]

Aw, thank you, Mim! Your support always means the world to me, especially considering what a talented writer/artist you are!

Good evening! Question:

Who are some good and/or underappreciated writers in the sasi fandom? Any recommendations?

You can also tag them in this post if you like!

[exhaustedfander]

Question for Fander writers

What character do you struggle writing the most, and why? 

Personally, I have the hardest time writing Patton. As much as I adore his character, I often worry I’m not getting him quite right, never know where to place the “kiddos”, and I’m terrible at coming up with puns so I have to utalize pun websites quite a lot.

[exhaustedfander]

I think I’m gonna title my upcoming intrulogical oneshot “Shake the Lightning from the Locks of Your Unbound Hair,” because I cannot stop listening to the song “Running Towards a Place” from the killers new album, Imploding the Mirage, and that’s a lyric from it. Also long haired Logan rights, my dudes! I feel like Remus really wanting to play with and braid Logan’s hair is a really sweet thing to think about, too.

[exhaustedfander]

There’s a really fun chapter of First Comes Love coming a little bit later tonight! I think you guys are gonna like it 

[exhaustedfander]

Saint Motel’s “Sweet Talk” as a Roceit song

Okay but imagine The song “Sweet Talk” by Saint Motel about Roceit. I say this as a major Janus Stan, but imagine the angst of it all.

[exhaustedfander]

Me bouncing between writing several different oneshot requests at once: Does this count as being productive?

Seriously though, I’ve got several really good requests in my inbox right now, I’m just incredibly bad at sticking to one thing at a time. With that being said, in the (who knows how distant) future, I’m gonna have some fun analogical, logince, moceit and dukexiety content coming out. Ah, the joys of being a multishiper! 

[exhaustedfander]

So many Mother Mother songs have such strong Remus vibes. I feel like he’d really like that band 

[exhaustedfander]

I’ve had suuuuuch bad writers block lately. I’m sorry updates have been few and far between as of late, but I promise content is coming soon. On an unrelated note, I’ve been thrifting quite a lot lately which is super fun. Would anyone be interested in photos of the outfits I’ve been able to find?

[exhaustedfander]

Very angsty Anxceit idea:

I’m listening to the wonderfully sad Amanda Palmer song “The Bed Song,” and thought to myself, “Huh, how can I make anxceit an even angstier ship? Make that song about them!” Communication issues, babey! The line “I would’ve told you if you’d only asked me,” reeeeally hurts in this context. 

[exhaustedfander]

Hey, this isn’t Sanders Sides related but I was wondering if anyone has any good Jonmartin fic recs? I recently got fully caught up on The Magnus Archives and Jonmartin makes me so happy (Yes, I know, TMA is a tragedy and my feelings are going to be absolutely crushed by the end. But SHHHH, let’s not think about that!) I’m incredibly new to the fandom and I’m not sure what the go-to fics are. I’m looking for anything, honestly, besides major character death of Jon or Martin. Be it short or long, I’m down to read it. So, please, send me some fic requests (and don’t be afraid to self promote!)

[exhaustedfander]

MOUNTAIN GOATS LYRICS!?!?!?!?!

Yup! The Mountain Goats are one of my favorite bands. I’m so hyped for their new album!