#fearneposting

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happy fearne calloway episode day

[swordmahes]

[lostamongthefearnes]

my wife and i adopted this german shepherd / lab mix puppy two weeks ago and we named her Fearne a little bit after ferns and a little bit after Fearne Calloway and anyway she is the cutest most silliest dog in the whole wide world pls just look at her :’)

[magsowo]

fearneposting

[maluspumilaa]

fearneposting again soon , ehe hehe.,

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fearne was born under the flare of a ruidus moon seven years ago. she's aged over a hundred in the feywild. she touched a vestige and gained a permanent reminder of what she could become if she was selfish with her powers. she lost some of her own warmth to a ghost pirate. she regained someone else's warmth with a titan's shard. its presence still lingers on her even when she's not transformed.

how much of her is still her?

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fearne being a weird fey girl that fell out of a portal in front of orym and him immediately offering friendship and understanding to this total stranger. laudna skulking into gelvaan expecting the worst from the townspeople and imogen immediately connecting with her and sympathizing with her struggles. ashton finding a hurt, beat up robot and trying to get them fixed up no questions asked. and then this whole ass group accepting chetney for the weird old gnome he is immediately...

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fearne when she finds out about the deal orym made

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i dunno, man.

i guess maybe back in episode 34 we didn't have as much fearne lore as we do now. how could you be so incurious, though? why didn't anyone question why fearne seemed to instantly go to a hellish inverted feywild or what that could mean for her? why are we only now realizing that being killed by otohan was traumatic for her too? like fearne wasn't just traumatized by watching both laudna and orym die and how that probably might've tied into her outburst at ashton when she killed him on accident? how about having to choose between them over and over again in life or death scenarios? and not just them, but being pressured and guilt-tripped into bad scenario after bad scenario over and over again that she's basically told to suck it up for the greater good? and she still keeps a brave happy face through it all? and the fandom rewards her by refusing to talk about her depth and only using her for shipping content or getting angry at her for being "selfish and impulsive" and it drives me fucking insane?

idk!! idk!!!!

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and the thing is, i get where they're coming from! laudna and imogen cannot consent to ignore the various magic bullshit that's tangled up with them so they're trying to make the most of it. but fearne can, and she's been running from a version of herself that accepted dark power and brutally murdered all of her loved ones for it! that's not her denying herself power, it's a conscious choice to not let people she cares about get hurt! and her massive near-murder of ashton really fucked her up because oh shit, she almost did that even without the shard in her! do you you get it. do you.

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also don't think i didn't notice you, ashley motherfucking johnson, making fearne be dead fucking quiet as soon as they got off the moon and the reality of fcg's death hit them

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hey whatever you do don't think about how fearne immediately tried to collect what was left of fcg's body but it was all just shrapnel and the only complete thing they have left of them is the coin that she flipped to see if she would save orym or laudna

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I am 1000% ready to step up on every soap box about Fearne Calloway. Because after being killed on Otohan’s blade this woman was revived only to be told Orym and Laudna were also down and iT WAS HER JOB TO BRING ONLY ONE OF THEM BACK.

Then she watched Ashton die several times over trying to keep the damage from being too much to bring them back from, and she was angry.

And then FCG uses their final act to save the group from Otohan only to be told that she has to watch her best friend walk around with the blade that killed him, and was then a coin flip away from him being GONE gone.

Orym has lost a lot of people, yes, but I would argue Fearne has had to live with a lot more as a result of Otohan.

And she plays it all so flawlessly too. Ashley fuckin Johnson, man.

and also her coping with the fact that the only reason she was born was to be a weapon that was stashed away in the feywild and that she was so desperate for her shitty fucking dad to be proud of her she almost died. and her trying to connect with imogen over them both being ruidusborn but never quite being able to because of laudna. and the way she loves and loves but is terrified to show that love or any other emotion that makes her uncomfy.

i love the her

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let’s talk about fearne getting mad!

fearne does not like being mad. she doesn’t like complex emotions in general. she likes being happy and she likes to see her friends happy. when dorian left, she hated the thought of feeling sad about him leaving.

this best shows off in episode 34 when she was killed and went to... somewhere. she shrugged off her own death, but was devastated when laudna and orym died and she had to choose which one of them to save. she didn’t want to. the thought of choosing herself and losing either of them would have killed her, and fcg gives her the coin so she doesn’t have to make that choice. and try as she might, she can’t save both. the coin said tails. laudna dies.

so she blames the coin for it. she is upset with fcg, but she pretends that the coin doesn’t exist until fcg uses a spell to make it more evident. and then she proceeds to talk about destroying the coin or getting rid of it even after laudna is brought back. and speaking of when laudna returns, fcg keeps using the coin and scaring her away! and fearne gets pissed when they do this and almost refuses to cure him because he was cruel to laudna.

and then when ashton and her reclaimed a shard everyone pushed her to take it right after she was told that using it would cause her to blow up and trying to make it sound like a good thing that she should have it. but she says no, it’s ashton’s shard. they should have it! they’re a titan, not me!

fearne is scared and uncomfortable, but she thinks she’s doing the right thing right up until she isn’t and ashton is almost killed due to them going off a hunch. and we see how her rationale works in episode 78: this is all ashton’s fault, no, it’s their stupid hammer’s fault, no, it’s all the harness’ fault, that caused all this, i have to destroy it so everything will be okay again.

and chetney confronts her and she again realizes the truth that they’re both culpable for their actions in this but she’s still upset whenever they mention the harness. she says she’s angry at ashton, and i think she genuinely was, but it’s not as angry as she is at herself and the harness that almost got him killed.

and it’s not nearly angry enough for her not to be horrified when they say that they deserved to die so she would be happy. so she takes something that she was told time and time again would kill her and reminds her of something that she has tried not to be like to protect her friends just so she can make sure her friends are all happy. because if they’re happy, she’s happy.

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me externally: imogearne good

me internally: fearne is terrified of anyone letting go of her in all her relationships. she deeply desires some sort of bond with them that will make them stay. she deeply cared for and still does care for chetney and bonded with him over his lycanthropy and was upset when he completely stopped pursuing her after they banged. while she does have feelings for ashton and now a solid bond with them because of their shards, she's convinced herself that ashton deserves better than her or would be miserable with her because she almost got him killed and he said he deserved to die. she is scared of using her shard power and they are not which further splits the rift. so she tries desperately to bond with imogen over their shared ruidusborn powers more and more blatantly even though she knows imogen loves laudna and wants them to be happy because they are her friends. even so, she also deeply loves imogen and hopes that she could be enough for her and that she won't leave like everyone else. and maybe if they're both ruidusborn it'll be worth it to stay with her. imogearne good.

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When Fearne told the Archheart that she thought she could handle Predathos as the vessel, I couldn't help but think she really would do that just so Imogen wouldn't have to.

My concern (I say 'concern'; it's more of an angst-riddled thrill) is that Fearne will pull an 'Ashton and the Shard' moment and take Imogen's place as the vessel. Especially after feeling so guilty for Laudna's death and later, for not taking the titan shard.

(Also, if Predathos turns out to be more of a starving alien creature than oblivion personified, she'd probably have a better chance of connecting with it, both having been caged for so long...)

hey remember during zone of truth spin the bottle when fearne implied she would help ludinus if all her friends could be alive after they released predathos