#fetus jeon-parks jeonparking

[whysojiminimnida]

Welcome To MiniMoni, or Jungkook Is Just Screwed Isn't He

Because let's be honest...

Cameron Phillip as Jungkook is not entirely wrong. But before we go barrel-rolling off to some toxic Jeonlous narrative that, well, okay, in this case it kinda DOES exist but only a little bit and it's not toxic, it's normal; Let's all enjoy twelve minutes or so of a nice compilation of some sweet and fun moments between Namjoon and Jimin:

Edited videos are always suspect to me unless I am (A) watching them for fun and not for evidentiary findings; or (2) they're not really trying to prove anything. But let's be reasonable here - nobody honestly thinks that MiniMoni are a thing, do they? Plus it's a really cute video with a lot of great moments. Props to the creator.

(photo collage cr. @sherwynphilip)

Cute boyfriend-looking guys in couple fits, okay, I guess I could see it if like a Jeon Jungkook didn't exist. They do look very pretty together. And there's nothing they love more than a good selca.

Honestly, I could ship it if not for the existence of the Jeon half of the Jeon-Park household. And the possibility of Namjoon just not being into guys.... BUT WAIT I STILL THINK HE KINDA IS THO. The Jimin effect also exists and I really don't care who you are, it's pretty obvious that Joon enjoys Jimin's visuals, his intellect, his emotional support, his friendship and his ass affection.

Jimin has an ability to find the emotional center of people around him. He is reportedly highly emotionally intelligent and is a caregiver, a gift-giver, an encouraging, kind presence (when he isn't being a total Slytherin) to his friends. And I think Joon appreciates that about him. Meanwhile Joonie stimulates Jimin's brain, his artistic side, his sharp wit and his need for affection and praise. Namjoon has no problem giving Jimin what he needs in any of those areas. That they also happen to find each other attractive is not necessarily a bad thing, and in this case, a little chemistry goes a long way. They kind of provide each other a safe flirtation outlet, if that makes sense.

It is very normal and not weird for two close friends to also be like "yeah, would possibly hit that if it wouldn't gank up the friendship and/or if I wasn't already otherwise involved." Happens all the time and it's not exclusively masculine.

WHICH BRINGS US TO WHY JUNGKOOK IS JUST SCREWED OKAY.

Jungkook's first real guy crush was, apparently, Namjoon. This is based on stuff Kook has said about joining BTS specifically because of Joon, and about his thighs, and his basically spending 2012-2014 just following Namjoon around like a puppy.

So Jungkook admires/crushes on Namjoon and Namjoon admires Jimin who flirts with the world but is in love with Jungkook, this actually does read kinda like bad fanfiction. Or maybe good fanfiction. IDK y'all I just show up here and make observations and post shit. I can't be held responsible for what these grown ass men do in front of a camera. Or behind it for that matter.

The upshot is, Namjoon is aware that Koo crushed on him first. He is also well aware of the Jeon-Park situation having been thoroughly exposed via my personal favorite show, Namjoon In The Middle, for well over five years now. Six, really. Maybe seven. Whatever, HE KNOWS OKAY. They ALL KNOW. Nobody's hiding from anyone in BTS. These guys got their boundaries all trampled on before most of them were out of their teens, they don't even know how to act most of the time.

And Jimin is also aware that Jungkook liked Namjoon maybe better right at first and he is not above caressing a wow-thigh here or there if he needs to get a point across. And sometimes he do. I don't know what the point was on this day but something was going on.

But let's please notice, Jimin is not the only Slytherin in Bangtan. Not by a long shot. Y'all got to stop villainizing Jiminie when Namjoon knows exactly what's up and he's just letting this ride and encouraging it if not openly initiating. And it's not the only time.

Maddest I've ever seen Kookie was at this fansign, please ignore the overt misspelling of "avert" and understand that I have an image limit I'm working against here, anyway, boy was PISSED OFF. Namjoon just triggers him when it comes to Jimin. And I don't find this "toxic" behavior. This is normal behavior. Normalize the idea that sometimes in relationships, especially as-yet unestablished ones, insecurities happen. Doesn't make him toxic, makes him human, get off his dick okay.

Maybe he knows something we don't or maybe Jiminie kinda uses Joon to rile up his man or maybe, maybe, Namjoon is also sometimes a Slytherin. To be fair Joon is owed certain compensatory enjoyment for having to be the Jeon-Park Police but somehow he lets Jimin get by with shit and kinda dishes it Koo's direction, historically, and I haven't figured that out yet.

But ...

In the last couple of years, as the Jeon-Parks have grown up a bit and solidified their own bond, Joon has also grown up a bit. Because I don't think it really damaged his and Jimin's friendship, but I do think he and Jungkook realized that while they are never gonna be the tightest duo in Bangtan, they do work together, they do both love and care for Jimin, and they are friends. Just, not Jinkook-level friends. MiniMoni are always going to be one of the closer pairs, and Minkook is kinda... a little on the side-eye side. But still cute. So things have mellowed a lot. Jungkook in particular has mellowed a lot. And as of late 2021, MiniMoni are still MiniMoni-ing and the Jeon-Parks are still Jeon-Parking and all is well (including Namjoon, I hope, he should be testing negative for COVID like, soon, right?) So that's my take on those guys. Cue the cannons. I'll be behind the sofa if you need me.

[whysojiminimnida]

He carried him in his arms😭😭.... Like what was the need for that? Can't Jimin walk? Does JK think they live in some kind of fairytale or some shit? This is real life and people's feelings are involved. They destroyed me. I am destroyed. It's like JK likes to show him off or something. Like, look, he is the most beautiful human and he's all mine😭😭... I am not okay. Not at all.. but like, this is what Park Jimin deserves, to be carried around and shown off like the mother fucking prince he is. Sigh. I need to get off the internet and get some sleep😂.. The concert was amazing as always 🥰🥰...

By the way, I love your blog, your sass and sarcasm is everything 🤗🤗❣️

Hiya @chumbay! Sorry I'm slow I was waiting on a picture and if you guess which one nothing will happen except me telling you you're awesome HERE WE GO Jungkook loves to hold on to his Jiminie. And if they need to go somewhere while he's holding him, that's cool. And Jimin has no problem just jumping, because he knows his man is gonna catch him every time.

I MEAN WE GOT THIS JUST LATELY LIKE What goes on, gentlemen, that the reflex response to a Jimin jump looks like this?

I AM STILL STUNNED BY THE REFLEXES. It's automatic. Not a second delay and BOOM ARMS POSITIONED FOR THIS

And it's not just the Bridal/Princess Carry all the time, either. It literally matters not at all what Jungkook is doing, Jimin just hops on like (credit to DT Parker) a spider monkey and Jungkook never, not ONCE, tells him no. He simply does not ever fail to hold on to his Jiminie. And his Jiminie knows this AND IS COMFORTABLE IN THAT KNOWLEDGE LIKE

I'm so sad right now WHY DO I NOT HAVE LOVE LIKE THIS DAMMIT

And it's been going on for years. At least five. Maybe as long as seven. Some love has been happening FOR A WHILE OKAY

I think that if there was such a thing as a true life fairy tale, these two have it. Two handsome princes, both of whom might be a princess from time to time, gender is a construct and we validate and celebrate that in this household. Difficult beginnings, overcoming stigma and hate, I think we have yet to even get to the happy ending part but just what we have seen so far is so beautiful...

I love them so much. The sun and moon. Sea otters. The Busans. Jimmeo and Kookliet. "You are me, I am you" don't steal it that's plagiarism

I wish them all the happiness their hearts can hold.

[whysojiminimnida]

But What About Orange Jimin, Though?

All I'm saying is that for a long time I did not understand the Lure of the Orange Jimin, and I am a hardcore Jimin in Perfect Man STAN.

It SLAPS. SHINHWA should be thrilled.

The choreo is amazing. Jimin carries that song FIGHT ME IDC I will happily die on that hill. Perfect Man Jimin is one of the top five Jimins in Jiminstory. Maybe top three but Seoul 2022 threw a wrench in there with that moon tattoo and that long hair

AHEM ANYWAY.

I have always been a Pastel Jimin enthusiast. Other people like Mint Yoongi (also excellent) or Red Taehyung or Purple Jungkook (it's me i'm purple jungkook) but I was a ride and die Kitty Gang girl

And let's be honest that is some peak Jimin right there. But Orange Jimin? It kinda eluded me.

I mean, he looks pretty but y'all it's Park motherfucking Jimin, he always looks pretty.

Lately though I've been going through a bunch of 2013-2016 stuff looking at the fetus-to-early Jeon-Parks, kinda trying to eyeball some parallels and stuff, and ...

I'm starting, belatedly, to figure it out. Like we all (I say all, some of y'all just got here last week it's cool) know that Jungkook really started showing up for Jimin more in 2015. That whole slightly mistranslated "I want you" video. THREE TIMES. And what the boy said translates better, according to some good translators and a Kevin, as "I want TO HAVE YOU" with, yes, all the things that implies.

And it started out like a game but I don't think it was really a game. It was plausible deniability and we all feel a little weird looking at this because of Jungkook's age (I'm getting to that) and Jimin's obvious fluster. This is 2015, Chicago, NOW 3 Part 6 photoshoot - the squirmy giggles start about 4:00:

Which is actually NOT EVEN WHAT I MEANT TO TALK ABOUT BUT. Later that year still in Orange Jimin Era we get this.

I'm OUT OF IMAGES? WTF TUMBLR FINE

Anyway I have decided that the Rainy Day Fight went down several months earlier than I thought. It had to have happened in the spring or summer (rainy season is June-August) of 2015. And I think that Jimin was in his full orange era, no longer the hip-hop snapback boy. Jungkook was coming of age that year in all the ways that mattered, although in 2015 Korea the age of consent was THIRTEEN and that's Korean age (I found a case involving a 15 y/o thrown out in 2017 for age of consent, believe it or not). It's now 16 which is still low. So we ain't gotta like it but the Orange Jimin was perfectly legal and then some, and so was Jungkook, in 2015 when they were 20 and 18.

THE SHIT I LEARN Y'ALL. PREtEND ThEREs A Pretty PICKSHUR HERE DERP

Anyway. I'm still not 100% on board the Bring Back Orange Jimin train - I'm holding out for blonde, or rainbow, or pastel Jimin again, lord love his hair follicles, but I think Jungkook would be totally into it. And for that reason (and the vain hope of a Perfect Man redo) I'm into it, too.

[whysojiminimnida]

I Got Your PROOF Right HERE

Old songs on new tour THEN WHAT (ireumeun Jungkook 2022 is what and OMG SEND HELP he's gonna need a bigger scale)

And I'm not mad about it. Lots to do with a brilliant anthology, plenty to discuss, we can stream ALL THE THINGS and maybe get Paradise and Louder Than Bombs live and cool stuff on Spotify I AM CENTERED ALL IS WELL let me have my moment of Zen thank you. It's been a bitch of a week for a lot of us, amirite? Bitches can't follow a Met Gala theme and SCOTUS is everything we knew they were and we're getting the new album and it's just... a lot OKAY WE'RE DOING OUR BEST RIGHT? We are. All of us.

But anyway I was mining for fetuses in a very Early Jeon-Parks way and NOT IN A ROE V WADE WAY DON'T TALK TO ME I'M STILL UPSET but I… noticed some things.

*cough* Minor things, really. *cough*

But you know how I said when Jimin talks, Jungkook listens with his entire self?

It's been going on for awhile.

AS MANY AS THREE CITIES YOU GUYS OMGGGGG I'm having fun with this. Stay tuned.

[whysojiminimnida]

Yeahhh… I have no words lol

https://twitter.com/jikook_connect/status/1513928653654032386?s=21&t=egucB_9AOMYBXA9eQ7X_gQ

LORD HELP US THE GAYS THE GAYS THEY INDIRECTLY KISSED

Jungkook was still a minor so I really can't say anything further about this other than if anyone thinks either of these kids was straight or attracted to anyone but each other -- even back then?

They would be, in a word, mistaken.

[whysojiminimnida]

WHEN I SAID I WANTED THIS IN HD I WAS NOT JOKING

So here it is.

The camera angles are not better but the resolution certainly is. My Jeon-Park house elf status is hopefully now assured. I can chill, secure in the knowledge that the Jeon Jungkook 2016 chin-jerk shoulder drop is captured for eternity in full screen 1080p, safe in the arms of my hard drive (and yours should you choose to save it AND I SUGGEST YOU DO) ALSO CAN WE JUST TALK ABOUT HOW PRETTY THE JEON-PARKS ARE BECAUSE OMGGGG SOOOO PRETTY Coming of Age Jikook is possibly my personal favorite of all the Pre-Jeon-Park-Household-Status Jikooks. They are a highly superior jikook. That is all.

...for now.

[whysojiminimnida]

WHICH OF YOU IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS

Because it is the gayest thing I have seen this week

… and that is going some considering this one guy wore a pink silk kimono with kittens on it for an entire FaceTime two days ago.

Like how did I not know this picture existed? Did I see it and delete it at some point? It is not in my "Gay Gay Couple Fits" folder nor is it in my "Sassy Dainty Koo Photoshoots" folder and it is not but should be in my Balls Out For Jimin-ssi folder so I did NOT HAVE THIS BEFORE TODAY Anyway thank you, whoever you are.

ETA: Thank you @slowburnwithahappyending for getting me other pics from this shoot and for letting me know they were from September 20, 2014. (Yep that one kid is totally a minor. Look away!)

[whysojiminimnida]

ONCE MORE FOR EMPHASIS AND COMMENTARY ... BECAUSE I SAID SO THAT'S WHY

Buckle in this is a long one with a read more linky and everything.

I AM AWARE I JUST POSTED THIS HANG ON and come along for the ride or don't it is totally your call. Because I bitch about the camera angles and the cutoffs and how WE BARELY SEE THEIR FEET WTF CAMERA PEOPLE but really it's all jealousy that I don't own this performance in 4K high definition from a full body perspective, is all. So we are gonna bust out the Bangtan Bomb and the original video and the lyrics and the influences. We are gonna take this baby out to a nice dinner and buy her some wine and chocolate and let her get a nice buzz on and ask her nicely if she'll whisper her naughty little secrets go over rhythms and backbeats and Why Jimin Is A Damn Genius and What Happened With Rehearsal and Own It (in the next post, probably) and

just go clicky and read on if you've a mind to do so.

Are you still there? (/portalturret)

Oh thank God because here's me posting the Bangtan Sub link that I keep around for just such purposes:

WHEN I TELL YOU I BOUGHT TIMBERLANDS OVER THIS I AM NOT JOKING OKAY and me a grown ass woman adult it is embarrassing. How emotionally invested I got. Such the Jeon-Park house elf I became. Call me a joker I will not even argue the point you are probably not wrong in any event. Because kids. This is dance.

It is not perfect dance. It's not. It's... kind of a mess, in places. JeiKei's got his balls out for Jimin-ssi in the rehearsal and nukes 'em for performance, like he doesn't even look up half the time for stylistic or shy reasons I don't know. Jimin can't focus. Things Went On after rehearsal on Day One but we'll get to that... in the next post probably so this one doesn't get too long. Y'all know this is a Park Ji Yoon cover right? You do okay. Good. But if you need a refresher course here is the original - not the music video because it's long, but the Y2K Music Bank performance because it's (a) shorter and (2) the choreo Jiminie wa Jungkookie used, mostly:

I've been a Park Ji-yoon fan since, well, forever, and this song is great and she is great and HERE ARE THE ENGLISH LYRICS:

https://lyricstranslate.com

Adult Ceremony Hey you, why are you hesitating? I know you want me Right now in front of you, I know what you want, What you’re waiting for, just come here I’m not that little girl, You used to know anymore, I’m a woman now I’m thankful that you’ve waited for me Now I’ll become a woman at your kiss (Chorus) I’m not a little girl anymore Don’t hesitate any longer As much as you waited, I’ve waited for this day too Give me twenty stems of roses, so I can feel your love As I wait for you, I close my eyes Hey you, I want to give you permission to give me your love Teach me how love is so sweet and fragrant It was hard looking at you suffering and waiting My heart even hurt But now came the day where there is no reason to wait anymore (Repeat Chorus)

AND HOLY SHIT PEOPLE WHAT IN THE WHAT WHEN I FIRST HEARD THE JEON-PARKS EVEN DID THIS I WAS LIKE WHAT THE HELL WHO AUTHORIZED THIS? ISN'T ONE OF THEM STILL A MINOR (he wasn't but give me credit for asking okay) AND

My brain exploded, y'all. It did. And they DID THE CHOREO, mostly. With Jungkook POPPING HIS GUM and WEARING THAT HAT and THOSE PANTS MY GOD no wonder. Jimin was his own strongest soldier that day in rehearsal the boy's SHIRT WAS SEE THROUGH HE SHOWED UP ALMOST NAKED Jiminie could barely BREATHE.

And y'all don't think Jungkook showed up that day LOOKING TO GET LAID? Yes he did. He was gonna prove he was grown, thank you. And if Own It is any indication he may well have BUT AGAIN NEXT POST ANYWAY

That wasn't even the best part of the choreography. NAH. The off-beats were great. I still think Jimin put most of this together but Jungkook seemed very happy to participate. The best part of the choreo was from the second half of the performance after they just abandoned Park Ji Yoon and went straight for Billie Jean and Dangerous/Smooth Criminal via Michael Jackson's 1995 VMA performance. Which: I think they had help since neither of them were dancing well in 1995. But maybe they didn't. Michael Jackson, personal life aside, was an absolute GOD of pop choreography. I was taught the entire 1984 tour at a classical ballet company in Texas. Not one song not five songs THE WHOLE SET LIST. Can perform the shit to this day which is HOW I KNEW that well hell, they were just doing Billie Jean right out the gate for the second half. And IT LOOKS GOOD.

(ETA for nerd reasons the very cool leg sweep battement to half-turn head pop thing and the crotch grabs are straight from the Dangerous stage at about 8:00. It was never performed exactly that way anywhere else so this is canon choreo anywayyyyy…)

If you care at all give this a watch, the good part is right after Slash so about 3:40. Not that Slash isn't great we're just not doing him today. And Dangerous/Smooth Criminal is at 8:00 and yes you have to click through to YouTube to see it because copyrights.

So yes. We have a bizarre but brilliant pairing of Park Ji-yoon and MJ by way of horny gay Jikook out there jikooking the jikookery and it plays wonderfully, actually.

Jungkook in particular has a specific jerk to his shoulders and neck that thrusts his head forward a little bit, and downward. It's less apparent now he's older but back in 2016 it was a hallmark of his dance style.

You can still see it in the My Time choreo, though - just kind of a jerk of the chin, almost. It's usually followed by him dropping his shoulders down deliberately - going into a turn is a good place to spot it, or into a transition right before a jump or drop. Jimin can do the exact same turn choreo and shoulder drop but it doesn't have the angular, sharp look you see when Jungkook jars that shit at you. I actually like it, it's distinctive.

Kookie’s lines are also very languid for as sharp as they are... it looks like he takes extra time to unfold his limbs. He doesn't, it's an illusion that is specific to him due to his limb length. Kook is not in a hurry to get anywhere, he just shows up finished on the beat, and it's part of what makes him a great dancer. If you get a still shot mid-move his lines are nearly perfect no matter what position he's in. And it seems, although maybe isn't, entirely innate. Like, he was born with it. Jimin OTOH is a sex dancer but we all knew this. And it's somewhat embarrassing to refer to a 20 year old Jimin as a sex dancer but let's be honest, his isolations combined with the legato of his movement... well sex plus technique equals one hell of a body roll at any given time.

He is also exceptionally precise in both his timing and his angles of movement in relation to the air and the floor. His math maths, basically, but it does so in a way that makes it look like breathing. Jimin is, to my eye, one of the most beautiful dancers ever on the planet. You can totally see why Jungkook might feel the need to prove some things. ANYWAY I AM APPARENTLY WRITING A DAMN NOVEL ABOUT THIS OVER HERE and I am sorry, it's personal and my own problem. I'll be continuing this post (probably tomorrow) with the timeline of rehearsal to performance, plus Own It, and all that stuff. My brain hurts now. See you when I get back!

[whysojiminimnida]

Yes They DO Have Insta ft. JeiKei is A Genius

Tannies' usernames on istagram : rkive, jin, agustd, uramyhope, j.m, thv Then Jungkook : abcdefghi_lmnopqrstuvwxyz (blank space = JK)

We all know it went down like this in the Jeon-Park shared apartment while they are quarantining together (let me have this until it's proven otherwise okay)

"Babe hey babe we gotta launch these instagrams" "I know bb we working on vacation, you gotta username picked out?" "Yeah babe. JK, duuuhhhh. You gonna JM for me?" (sighs) "My name is J-I-M-I-N, dork." "Not according to my tattoo it isn't." "Oh. OH. You know what, baby?" "...fuck. JK is taken, goldenboy is taken, hwanggeummaknae is fucking taken...jeonbam is taken... what, love?" "I just got j.m for my user name. Just like on your hand." "Awwww... ilysm babe, c'mere..." Some time later....official insta user j.m slides under the covers, where unnamed official insta user is glaring at his phone. Bam the wonder pup snorfles across two pairs of feet happily etc etc insert half naked post coital domestic bliss with a side of Annoyed Jeon here.

"Baby, any luck on that insta user name?" "Babe you know I love ARMY but this is ridiculous. Damn fanstagrams up on my dick like jeonjungoo is taken, ggukie is taken, kyukyu is taken... FUCK sassydaintykooismyfavoritekoo is taken goddammit" "Baby, last person on your dick was literally --" "Get back here. We're on vacation. Where you going? Spent two weeks having to act like we don't even live together then they put us in separate cars to drive us to the same place hold up.... nope, goldencloset also taken." "Huh. Maybe just start looking at what isn't taken, baby?" "Oh my GOD PARK JIMIN YOU ARE A GENIUS I got it I got it how about abcdefghi__lmnopqrstuvwxyz?" "Perfect, baby. Hey, do you think we could use these insta things to bring back Fetus Us? You were soooo cuuuuute!"

"What NO, babe. I was the most awkward baby gay and oh god that hat you wore NO don't why god whyyyyy..."

" I feel like the Return of The Snapback could be a thing."

[whysojiminimnida]

I was out on the bird app looking for my favorite romantic jikook video for Valentine’s Day and

I found it!

It’s on loop now.

Yoongi the cat says yeah truth, that’s how he lost his balls and I’m just like yeah I KNOW I paid the vet who’s your bad bitch NOW

[whysojiminimnida]

A Lot of Dancing Was Done That Day

OR: DAMMIT Jungkook STOP POPPING YOUR GUM; ALSO Why You Drop Like That Park Jimin?

My GOODNESS Y'ALL these kids out here making me clutch my pearls. Good LORD. We have a rapping Taehyung, dancing Kims, Jikooks just jikooking the jikookery (nbd), there's always a Hobi and even Yoongi is in here like "please steal this VCR when it comes out on paid VOD in FIVE YEARS and do something productive with it" AND WHO AM I TO ARGUE WITH MY CAT SO HERE YOU GO And seriously, what in the gum popping slut dropping mutual seduction was all that, because the Jeon-Parks were FEELING THEMSELVES that day. And possibly each other. LORD HAVE MERCY.