#for context i guess in sg not a lot of people like to interact with strangers or random kids bcoz thats just how it is but WAHHH

[synth-spinner]

There was some small kid outside the restaurant window making silly fun hand gestures and there's this HUGE guy sitting by the window (white people so tall) who just immediately started COPYING HIM AND PLAYING WITH HIM AND AND THEY ARE.. HAVING A BLAST !!! World is a joy born to love....<3 be so niceys and have so much fun.. aughhhhh

[mogamifucker666]

 cabana au plot thing maybe. i can’t write so.. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

premise: Mogami is an assassin/hitman, working at a tropical resort for cover. his mom is sick. he works with SG guy (Sargent) as assassins but also at the same tropical resort place. Matsuo is a rich gold digger, killed his last husband but was judged innocent in the trial. now he’s looking for thrills, doesn’t desire more money, just trying to have a good time. which for him means.. causing choas.

(this post is so long and dumb and gay i am so sorry for anyone on tumblr mobile RIP)

(edit: it’s even longer now and i tried to fix the typos from before. i hate how invested i am in this AU and yet i cannot stop.)

Matsuo comes to this resort regularly and the staff are Wary and particular about the staff they (somewhat) sacrifice to Matsuo. but Matsuo has MAD CA$H so they assign him like.. a personal attendant of sorts.

Mogami was hired between the last visit and this one, has been working there a lil while (some months but less than a year), Sargent is part of the resort’s management and works to cover for Mogam to give him alibis while he’s off killing ppl Just In Case

Mogami probably has an alias that he uses for like everything and that’s “Kai” bc he works by the ocean lmao. 

I guess Mogami works around the pool and beach? waiter/bartender type thing. trained as a lifeguard so he does that too.

Anyhow he gets assigned to Matsuo, is aware that Matsuo’s was on trial for the murder of his husband but wasn’t convicted, but doesn’t really know what to expect. definitely not the chaotic twinky gremlin that Matsuo is in this AU.

Possible first interaction: Mogami is just trying to serve some drinks  and Matsuo intercepts him and he's like "can i help you.....uhm........?" (can't figure out Matsuo's gender) 

Matsuo, "that would be sir, thank you. but in a different context you can call me baby." Mogam is internally like o no-- Matsuo, not missing a beat, "and i can call you daddy." and Mogami is like. CRIngiNG he's like this is it, this is the curse brought on by killing people, the bad luck has finally caught up with me-- etc

Matsuo has a thing about paying ppl with Mogami’s job 4 sex/seducing them

Mogam is not about it

Matsuo won’t ease up

Anyway. things r tense and assassin stuff is more difficult bc of dealing with being Matsuo’s attendant. but there r days when Mogam isn’t working, where he has leave to “see his mom” which are often used for assassin stuff but. sometimes seeing mom. sometimes both.

Mogam still maintains his cool and indifference to Matsuo’s attempted advances

it’d be ridiculous if Matsuo very obviously fakes drowning. standing in shallow water (literally standing) and just flinging water around and looking like a fool, calling out “help me lifeguard! im Drowning! oh the humanity! i am struggling to breathe oh lifeguard please help me!” mostly bothering the other people around so Mogami feels compelled to usher him away but Mogami does Not lol and Matsuo just looks like a desperate fool.

maybe he actually pretends to drown

“i think i need cpr”

“i’ll just call an ambulance for you”

“come ON” as Mogami gets up and Leaves

Matsuo: >;;;;^(  Mogami: B^|

Matsuo prObably goes for some other poolboys in the meantime. partly for attention, partly because it’s what he does.

Matsuo insists that Mogami has a secret (and he does) but Mogam denies that he has any secret of interest to Matsuo

somehow Matsuo finds out about his mom tho and Mogam is like “ah yes. my dark secret. i am indeed secretly tender at heart and love my mother very much. u got me.” but like. no it’s that he’s killing people. But there is some bonding and more respect from Matsuo. some but not much.

the Advances continue tho Matsuo is like still like  “if u need money then sleep with me??”. Mogam is like. No.

also, at some point, Mogami to Matsuo “has anything bad happened to you at all in your life?” (bad things have happened but it’s been a While and Matsuo is hella detached from that)

Matsuo is legit like. lowkey a psychopath probably and breaks into Mogam’s (place of residence) (apartment proabably?) and Mogam gets back from a nearby “job” (shady bloody job) and Matsuo sees him (Matsuo wasn’t hiding lol) and Mogam Very Clearly bloody (under the shirt he was wear and since removed bc he’s home now) and is internally like “i’m not prepared to deal with this. this is over my head, the disappearance would go noticed, and would obviously connect to me... i’ll call Sargent. i probably have to kill him, such a hassle.. could be the end of things. what i thoughtless greedy awful--”

i drew it:

(evil gremlin pixie gets gay while dead-inside man contemplates the logistics of murder and disposing the body)

he glances down and Matsuo is like... sparkly heart emojis looking at the blood on Mogami and. Mogam is CONFUSED hE’s like “What.. are you doing looking like that?????”

(the blood drawn on his face/hand doesn’t make sense now that ive thought about it but. i can’t be bothered now.)

(my fave Mogami reaction to Matsuo is “bitch what the fuck” honestly) 

Matsuo is rlly hot about the blood i but Mogam is just tired of this he’s like. resigned and kind of given up and legit just “I’m going to take a shower”

“can i come with u? ::::3c”

“you can do whatever you want” (figures Matsuo will follow him but doesn’t care if Matsuo leaves and tells the police he’s just tired rn)

Matsuo does follow him (he’s got his Eyes on the Prize)(the “prize” has gotten more and more interesting and enticing as time went by and now he is enthralled. Matsuo is chaotic and freaky and i love him. kinky(TM))

Mogam is trying to ignore Matsuo in the shower but eventually just Gives Up and like yeah wow sex huh

it is. a lot more good than Mogam anticipated and Matsuo is very :^)))))) after (satisfied and “i told u so” and still sneaky but also. more solidly attached now)(Mogam is endearingly passionate  and it’s hot i guess idk don’t look at me)

Matsuo is probably the only (alive) person besides Sargent who knows he’s killing people so like. that relieves tension and allows for more intimacy ok

(im gay don’t talk to me)

at some point after that Matsuo is like “you like killing people”

“no, it’s just a job”

except he does and something happening close to the time of the convo is like ‘wait yes i do enjoy it..’

At Some Point Matsuo gets a wound over his eye (so the scar matches canon lol), it’s somehow a result of hanging around Mogami

thanks @ Nick for this idea: maybe Matsuo gets kidnapped and Mogam has to go save him. Jokes on Mogami tho Matsuo knows how to use a gun and can handle i knife decently. basically Matsuo kills at least Some of his abductors, gets his face slashed, and escapes by the time Mogami arrives to save him.

probably a sobering experience for Matsuo like ‘o right actions have consequences that affect me. wow. strange.’

this isn’t a deterrent for him tho, he’s still having fun, but he’s gonna be less flippant and careless from then on.

idK eventually an agreement of commitment happens and like. Mogam quits and the resort and moved back with Matsuo to the US i guess and now he doesn’t have to worry about money for his mom’s care bc Matsuo is stacked.

so Matsuo has married twice and the latest one is dead but the other one (his first marriage) is to Toichiro.

Toichiro’s wife divorced him, he’s rich and is some important af person in a corporation idk, he and Matsuo r together for a while and then married briefly and then Matsuo divorces him and gets hella money (awful. cruel. rude boy. evil. i love it) 

(their relationship was like. probably kind of sad bc Toichiro is pretending he’s not torn up abt his ex-wife and maybe Matsuo like?? wasn’t just being a gold digger and actually cared about him, but was constantly eclipsed by the ex-wife n got tired of it and once they were married he was pretty soon like “Okay. That’s That. Bye.” dark. idk Matsuo is an energetic and wild person and Toichiro is cold and dead inside and Matsuo probably brought a lot of like.. joy to his life, and he took that for granted n Matsuo left. bye bish.)(lmao i h8 angst i’m sad now)

the current dynamic between him and Toichiro is like.. whenever they see each other they just drag the shit out of each other and r snide and that’s their point of camaraderie but Matsuo rlly doesn’t care abt him and always rubs Toichiro’s unsatisified life in his face.

but Matsuo is with Mogami now and they’re back in the US (some big city, probably Los Angeles or NYC.. or both. Matsuo has an unnecessary excess of wealth he can have a house on both coasts) but they end up talking with Toichiro and so Toichiro and Matsuo r doing their nasty banter thing and Toichiro starts talking dirty and about stuff he and Matsuo did and Matsuo is kind of pissed and internally like ‘wow in front of my boyfriend?? i know i have no class either but xcuse u bitch :^)’ but. also talks abt the stuff he’s been doing with Mogami. meanwhile Mogami is just there SEETHING quietly, tensely but politely smiling, thinking 'the nerve of this awful man with ugly eyebrows. abhorrent.' Matsuo is keeping an eye on him as the tension is rising and eventually.. 'wow my murder bf is about to fight my ex and while that's Hot that's not a good idea---' so he he cuts the conversation off like "well, i know who i've chosen--" wraps arm around Mogami's waist "--have a good life pining for your ex-wife" and like. leaves. bye.

or “have fun trying to fill the void left my your ex-wife for as long as you live”

Matsuo’s second marriage is probably to Ishiguro and purely for the money. but Ishiguro is gross and old and Matsuo was tired of waiting for him to die and took matters into his own hands. and ended up with a lot of money and no jail time.

idk what else. vague ideas kind of like. Mogam has a day of and Sargent goes to visit momgami in the hospital as a way to cover for Mogami going to do a hit. or doing a hit for Mogam so he can visit his mom. tru friends. 

the beginning aesthetic being like. tacky tropical beach and it changing into like. lavish but sleek spy-aesthetic by the end is funny to me. tropical pattern prints and speedos and petty drama and humar to dark clothes and a scar  and like. weirdly devoted and sexy dynamic. silly to serious. hilariously bad rom com to..  rich murder gays (NBC Hannibal stole my aesthetic)

im starting to fall asleep but ya this au was originally 100% shitpost and yet here. i am. thinking about it seriously.

[theblessed-unrest]

Story of my Life

Today as I was sitting in the Seminar Room for a marketing workshop and hearing everyone share the vision they have for themselves 10 years later, it struck me that everyone has their own stories. I think when I was younger I hated social interactions and went out of my way to avoid them - looking back it was a mixture of pride and (natural amounts as a kid of) self-absorption (both of which I still have to guard against!). It was a seemingly trivial activity but through it I was reminded that people’s personal experiences really shape their world views which go on to shape their visions and what they want to do with their lives. 

I think it really sank in as I was silently judging (I’m so judgey omg - but judgement can be good too... right?) everyone as they were sharing their visions. They were mostly noble sounding - e.g. to build a more inclusive Singapore society where all children can learn to live together and embrace each other’s differences / to ensure children get to enjoy their childhood in safety, comfort and protection while imparting skills and knowledge to them - and it struck me how they always started with their own stories or volunteering experiences before they shared their visions. But one particular one got me thinking - is this really necessary and struck me as quite naive. This was the vision of improving social media literacy in Singapore. I thought to myself: Is there really a need for this in Singapore? Even if there were, how would you go about encouraging social media literacy - especially in a hyper polarised context where these extreme groups of people cannot be appealed to by reason?

Then as I went to get my coffee fix during the break (6 hour workshop and I only had tea in the morning ok), the guy who shared his vision of improving social media literacy (L) wanted to refill his bottle too. He didn’t bring his access card so he needed mine to enter the lounge, so we started talking and it turns out L is a graduate student studying Information Systems and is considering writing his research paper on ways of improving social media literacy. It was then that I realised how this wasn't a naive interest in the subject, but something that he was deeply passionate about and had expertise in dealing with. As we were talking about this and American media and ways to align this goal of social media literacy with the profit-making objectives via advertising on social media platforms, I recalled reading an article about Google’s Jigsaw using algorithms to dissuade people from joining ISIS (in 2016 where they were rampant and releasing a lot of videos on Youtube). Turns out this information was rather in line with and useful for his research! And I was reminded how fruitful conversations can be so fulfilling but can only come about with humility and being genuinely interested in someone’s life story.

Such fulfilling social interactions of late has made me grow to really enjoy talking to new people and hearing their stories. I have grown in my love for humanity as I come to realise that no single person’s story is mundane. And the most interesting of people I’ve met are the ones who at first glance appear to be mundane! It’s so hard to dislike someone or categorise them into “good/bad” or other convenient paradigms when you actually know them as a person. Other stories I’ve heard today which I just want to recount for no real reason than to humanise humanity:

The trainer today is currently a post-grad student at SMU and did his Masters after working for 25 years in Visa Worldwide. He left his well-paid job because he found it unfulfilling (as you do) and wanted to go into teaching. Not being deterred that he would be the oldest student in class, he pursued his Masters in Marketing and Consumer Insights in his 50s and said he even went on to “ace” it. He also sat on the board in the social service sector where he noticed a deep distrust between people in social service and the wealthy businessmen who provide funding. I guess the confluence of these experiences culminated in his vision to groom the youth to be able to make social impact for good in the future and bridge these divides. What really inspired me was how he went against the grain to leave his job and pursue his masters late in his years, and how in spite of his rich experiences, he remained so humble and approachable. Another example of an adult who doesn’t have to grow jaded!

Another intern from IIE who I also really enjoy talking to (an Art and Psychology and I forgot what else major from Columbia) was talking about her heritage - her mother’s Italian and her father’s Greek-Roman, and they met in Venezuela. She’s now studying in the States and came to Singapore to do her internship. She conducts art classes in a low-income community school in NY and hopes to increase the number of first-generation college students from underprivileged backgrounds through art. I find that really cool too because I do see the importance of arts education and there are studies showing a correlation between arts and creativity, improved academic performances and boosted confidence. And in general I love making connections between seemingly unrelated things/disciplines. She’s also very well-versed in protest art which is so intriguing to me because that’s really arts effecting change in our culture, politics and human psyche and the combination of beauty and the fluidity that comes with it with rigid structures/systems in place.

Talked to another graduate JD student, C, when we were throwing away the pizza boxes. He did his undergraduate studies at NTU in the sciences but seems to have a heart for the marginalised groups in SG. Don’t know the full story yet because the break ended but to be continued for sure!

Also met another SMU undergraduate in the same year, Ch, who I don’t remember seeing around school but said she has seen me around before. Apparently she has pictorial memory so she can remember faces really well but she doesn’t remember where exactly we’ve met. Super nice and sweet girl - asked me if P (a LCSI staff) had eaten and suggested that we set aside some pizza for her in case it ran out (it did within like 20 mins). So much to learn in loving others around me practically!

So many other miscellaneous interesting and enjoyable social interactions I had today (and the night before and really this whole week) that I can’t possibly list out all which is leaving me really warm and fuzzy and wide-eyed this evening.