Tumgik
#force that could actually do something anymore. Literally on our last telehealth call my old therapist said that a large portion of
flippedorbit · 2 years
Text
if i get talked down to one more god damn time I’m leaving again. I don’t care that its fucking storming outside
#I’d rather be struck by literal lightning than be treated like a two year old because someone doesn’t know how to raise their own kids.#hell i wasn’t even really raised. I had to do most of that shit for myself because everyone was more focused on my little sister.#I remember younger me wishing so desperately for my parents to pay attention to me and love me as much as they did her. And now#they don’t fucking mean shit to me. I’ve been treated like the cause of all evil for so long and I’m just genuinely so fucking sick of it.#I can’t get one moment of peace anymore in this house. I literally don’t even have a therapist right now. There is no help from an outside#force that could actually do something anymore. Literally on our last telehealth call my old therapist said that a large portion of#the stress I experience day to day is completely environmental; as in the people around me in my day to day life. I don’t know if its my#emotions or the sleep deprivation talking anymore but damn it I wanted to be treated nicely for once by my blood family.#I want to be told that I am loved and not immediately doubt it because everyone’s actions say the exact opposite.#I want to be told that they care and be able to fucking believe it. I want to care about so many things but the lack of care I receive#makes it a bit hard to dish out what I already have so very little of. No one in my family knows any of my interests anymore. Literally#every time in the past I’ve tried to open up about something I care about or am passionate about I get mocked or ignored. And yet#I have to listen to every little thing that my family members say and not disagree about anything they feel strongly on. It’s#absolute fucking bullshit and I want things to fucking change around here. I want to get better so badly but I literally fucking can’t.#I can barely get out of bed before 11am on most days now. I stay up later than I should so that I can enjoy the things that I love without#getting belittled or told to do something else.#anyway i think thats enough emotions for now. I really need to ask about getting stardew before I lose my nerve to do so#vent
0 notes