#fred and remus live bishes

[animegeek-101]

Sirius : it's time to end this once and for all Voldemort : why you gotta be so sirius about it? Sirius : well you're quite nosey today aren't ya? Voldemort : ... Death eaters : ... Remus, Harry, Ron, the twins and other Hogwarts students : * laughs * Bellatrix : is these bishes for real' James from heaven : for fvck's sake you're in the middle of a fvcking war!! Voldemort : you all would pay for this AVADA KEDAVRA!! Harry : OMG I'm so scared, bish take the hint I'm ImMuNe to aVadA keDaVrA Voldemort and the death eaters : bish say what? Harry : and now AVADA KEDAVRA! Voldemort dies * everyone is sHoOk * Harry : lastly * goes on one knee * Harry : ginny since the day I met you and the day we started dating I always knew- Ginny : oh harry! Harry : that I was and forever will be gay * turns to Malfoy * draco will you marry me? Malfoy family: ...what? Lucius : I can assure you Pottah that my son would never marry the likes of yo- Draco : Yes! I've been waiting for this day for the past 6 years! Lucius : dear do you mind booking the therapist for tonight? Narcissa : should i bring your emotional support vodka as well? Lucius : and the tequila. Draco : mom dad wtf?!

the end

A/N ; it was meant to be shorter than this but oh well. also i really do suck at tags.

[hp-again]

Rereading Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince: Chapter Five - An Excess of Phlegm

WE AT THE WEASLEYS HOUSE YALL!!!!!! time to party

“Hi, Tonks.” Harry thought she looked drawn, even ill, and there was something forced in her smile. Certainly her appearance was less colorful than usual without her customary shade of bubble-gum pink hair.

is it wrong that it bothers me tonks is so fuq’d up over a man? but then again, the man IS remus so i guess its understandable. 

- I LOVE THAT THE FIRST THING MOLLY DOES IS FEED AND LOVE HARRY like it just makes me remember that all is well and good in the world at this house

- lol at every hand of the clock pointing at ‘mortal peril’ and molly just shrugging like ‘meh. nbd’

“What do you like me to call you when we’re alone together?” Even by the dim light of the lantern Harry could tell that Mrs. Weasley had turned bright red; he himself felt suddenly warm around the ears and neck, and hastily gulped soup, clattering his spoon as loudly as he could against the bowl. “Mollywobbles,” whispered a mortified Mrs. Weasley into the crack at the edge of the door.

arthur and molly know how to keep the sex game picante 

- fred and george live in a lil flat in diagon alley now bc their such big business tycoons and if i wasn’t already attracted to them before, things have gone to a whole other level

- THE TRIOS BACK TOGETHER YALL!!!!! ron got so excited he punched harry in the head!!!! it was adorable!!!!

Fleur turned back to Harry, swinging her silvery sheet of hair so that is whipped Mrs. Weasley across the face.  “Bill and I are going to be married!” “Oh,” said Harry blankly. He could not help noticing how Mrs. Weasley, Hermione, and Ginny were all determinedly avoiding one another’s gaze.

MY GURL FLEUR!!!!!!! this plot line always pissed me tf off bc everyone hates on her the entire book when in reality she is truly the goddess we all aspire to be

- like forrealz they’re all plotting to stop their wedding and get bill to fall in love with tonks instead bc shes ‘ funnier/nicer/smarter’ than fleur and its like BISH yall dont even know her!!! and as harry (and I) have pointed out, she was in the triwizard tournament so UM she aint dumb!!!! LEAVE FLEUR ALONE

“She still hasn’t got over what happened... you know... I mean, he was her cousin!” Harry’s heart sank. They had arrived at Sirius. He picked up a fork and began shoveling scrambled eggs into his mouth, hoping to deflect any invitation to join in this part of the conversation.  “Tonks and Sirius barely knew each other!” said Ron. 

1. lol @ everyone thinking tonks is depressed about sirius 2. harry :’(  3. savage ron going in on a supposed mourning person is savage

- HAHAHAHA harrys finally confessing to ron and hermione what the prophecy said about him being the chosen one and then hermione gets punched in the eye by a telescope lololol really lightened the mood

“Hermione, will you shut up, you’re not the only one who’s nervous!” barked Ron. “And when you’ve got your ten ‘Outstanding’ O.W.L.s...” “Don’t, don’t, don’t!” said Hermione, flapping her hands hysterically. “I know I’ve failed everything!”

if i havent said it enough over the past five books yet, i love hermione granger.

“How did you do?” “I - not bad,” said Hermione in a small voice.  “Oh, come off it,” said Ron, striding over to her and whipping her results out of her hand. “Yep - nine ‘Outstandings’ and one ‘Exceeds Expectations’ at Defense Against the Dark Arts.” He looked down at her, half-amused, half-exasperated. “You’re actually disappointed, aren’t you?” Hermione shook her head, but Harry laughed.

if a ‘half-amused, half-exasperated’ look doesn’t spell out L-O-V-E to you, then idk what will

- aw at harry thinking he wont get to be an auror bc snape wont let him takes potions. JUST U WAIT LIL BEBE!!!!!

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