#further adventures in wisdom teeth removal

[talesfromthebandgeekmafia]

God I’m so hungry but the only thing I’m allowed to eat today is cold smooth stuff so my options are milkshake pudding or popsicle 😕 I just want some chicken

[catonablog-blog-blog]

Absurd Advice: The Benefits of Flossing with Licorice Hello there, my fellow oddballs and eccentric individuals! I'm Rufus T. Flywheel, your guide through the whimsical world of unconventional wisdom. Today, I have a rather peculiar topic to discuss with you - the benefits of flossing with licorice. Yes, you read that right. Licorice, that delightful confectionery treat, is not just for satisfying your sweet tooth. It turns out, it can also double as a surprisingly effective tool for maintaining your dental hygiene. Intrigued? Well, let's dive in and explore the absurdity of this advice together. Now, before you dismiss this idea as sheer lunacy, let me assure you that there is some method to my madness. Licorice, derived from the root of the Glycyrrhiza plant, has been used for centuries in traditional medicine for its antibacterial and anti-inflammatory properties. In fact, licorice extract is found in many oral care products for its ability to combat plaque and bacteria in the mouth. So, why not take this a step further and use licorice as a flossing alternative? Flossing is a crucial part of maintaining good oral hygiene. It helps to remove food particles and plaque from between your teeth, preventing cavities and gum disease. Traditional floss can be harsh on sensitive gums and may cause discomfort for some individuals. This is where licorice comes to the rescue. Its soft, pliable texture makes it an ideal candidate for a gentler alternative to traditional floss. Plus, the natural antibacterial properties of licorice can help to keep your mouth clean and fresh. Now, you may be wondering how exactly you can use licorice as a floss. Fear not, my intrepid explorers, for I have devised a simple method for you to try. First, procure a piece of licorice root. You can find this at many health food stores or online. Cut off a small section, about 6-8 inches in length. Chew on one end of the licorice root to soften it slightly. Then, gently maneuver the licorice between your teeth, using a sawing motion to remove any debris. Voila! You have just flossed with licorice. But Rufus, I hear you cry, won't this make my mouth taste like a candy shop? Ah, my astute friends, that is a valid concern. While licorice root does have a naturally sweet flavor, it is much less intense than the sugary licorice candies you are familiar with. Additionally, the antibacterial properties of licorice can help to neutralize any lingering sweetness and keep your breath fresh. Just be sure to rinse your mouth with water after flossing to remove any residue. Now, I must issue a word of caution. Licorice is not suitable for everyone. If you have a known allergy to licorice or related plants, it is best to avoid using it as a flossing alternative. Additionally, licorice root should not replace regular dental flossing entirely. It can be a fun and novel addition to your oral care routine, but traditional floss is still the gold standard for removing stubborn plaque and debris from between your teeth. In conclusion, my dear adventurers, the world of oral hygiene is not as black and white as we once thought. Embrace the absurdity of flossing with licorice and discover the potential benefits it can offer. Remember, it's okay to think outside the box and try unconventional methods from time to time. Who knows, you may just stumble upon a hidden gem of wisdom in the most unexpected of places. Until next time, keep smiling and stay curious! Yours whimsically, Rufus T. Flywheel

[isedonsdndgame]

Game Night 2020-11-14

Once the party is done healing their most immediate wounds, they head into the next defensive chamber, once more bypassing the guardian creatures that have now roused themselves and quickly passing through the transit tube to the Emerald Heralds chamber. The combat is furious but short lived as the party quickly focuses their attack on the central crystal while taking numerous wounds from the onslaught of many spined limbs and psychic assaults. Ignys quickly gathers up some of the green dust to complete the components he believes will be vital to the amber prison ritual that he learned in Barovia. The final green shimmers on the large warded door fade and it opens to reveal overwhelming white light that fills the chamber. An amused voice fills their heads saying “You fought hard for an audience with Bolothamogg, you have my attention.” As the voice of Bolothamogg speaks, the transit tubes leading from the current chamber are overgrown with spines and teeth that prevent any further use of them.

Considering their options for healing, they discuss the possibility of taking a short rest before entering the final chamber.  In response to their suggestion, Bolothamogg offers to allow them one hour to rest if they will let him have a small peak in their minds without any resistance. The party roundly refuse the offer and draw upon the last of their healing potions, scrolls and the last charges in Driscoll's staff of healing. As they prepare to enter, Samantha reminds them that while Bolothamogg is strong here, the very essence of their location can still be shaped by the strength of  their minds. Healed as much as they can, the party heads into the light of the innermost chamber. The brilliance of the light surrounds them and they seem to be someplace with an endless horizon and impossibly bright at the same time. The doors they entered from are no longer in view and they can feel the presence of Bolothamogg everywhere around them, pressing into them, seeming to know every aspect of themselves.

Ignys and Iltharian feel a presence burrow into their minds and dive through their memories while Iskafar and Driscoll manage to resist the attempt. The voice is once again amused and wonders how well they can deal with their past challenges now. The party then sees a writhing circle surround them, brown and green shapes rushing towards them from the distance. As they get somewhat closer, they can be seen to be thousands of the twig blights that they once fought before.  Ignys thinks about surrounding themselves in fire and they notice some flickering flames try to take hold but are unable to fully manifest. Driscoll hastily thinks about a wall of flame as well but is not able to cause it to manifest. Unable to conjure a quick fix, Iskafar throws down the adamantine fortress and it rapidly expands into a tower. They all rush in and manage to bar the door just as the wave of twig blights crushes up against the walls of the tower. 

Driscoll asks the group to think hard about him manifesting a supercharged divine aura and as the party aids in his concentration, the tower chamber becomes filled with radiant lights that swirl around. The others look outside and see the field extending 20 feet from the tower and turning the sea of blights to ash. After a while, when the last of the blights are destroyed, Bolothamogg voices his amusement and dismisses both the aura and the adamantine fortress. He then conjures up an incarnation of Strahd, the Baba Yaga, and the Icy Bladelord from the Alabaster Mansus, all three just standing around the party, watching and ready for any command. Bolothamogg then advises that it is time for their minds to be purified so they can join the other countless souls and their memories that are part of itself.

Ignys feels a pressure in his mind and his scene shifts to that of Ashbourne manor burned almost to the ground, his burned and injured father in front of him with a pleading look on his face saying “Ignys! If you can hear me, your ritual went horribly wrong and you went on a rampage! You've been burning everything and everyone while shouting about a psychic god or some other nonsense! Please let me put you in the vault before you cause any more harm!” Ignys, having prepared himself to be facing mental trickery of some sort, steels himself and argues with his father before killing him swiftly, anger rising at the situation he was put in. The rest of the party see Ignys freeze in his movements and appears to become partially see through.  Driscoll concentrates and thinks about Bolothamogg in physical form and a colossal entity of twisted tendrils and eyes appears, towering over them. It appears to peer at itself before expressing interest at the unexpected development.

Iskafar is next to feel the pressure on his mind and succumbs to the mental prison that shows himself covered in blood and holding his cursed axe while standing in the corpses of an entire village. The feeling of helplessness and the drive to continue killing creeping up on him as he looks to another village in the distance. Seeing Iskafar’s form freeze and shimmer as Ignys did, Driscoll concentrates and wills himself to duplicate with rethread fate into for copies of himself, and he dives into the form of Bolothamogg, each form radiating a divine aura that spins through its flesh tearing holes in the incarnation.  Driscoll feels a pressure in his mind but manages to shrug it off as he continues the assault, the extra copies of rethread fate burning out his ability to do so in the future. Bolothamogg redirects his attentions to Iltharian and traps him in a mind prison that has him apparently as a lord of an elven kingdom and swamped in bureaucratic duties that seem to overwhelm him. He struggles under that reality for a moment before violently rejecting the premise. As he does so, he hears chuckling and looks up to see the cut facets of a gem that seem to make up the sky. Beyond that gem surface, he sees a face that looks similar, but not the same as his own. He hears the voice from that face speak its humour at what a tortured mind gets up to as the soul gem is put back into a darkened storage.

Driscoll finally succumbs to a mental prison of his own as he valiantly tries to destroy the physical form of Bolothamogg. The illusion of his capture revolves around veneration of the Silence being outlawed and himself executed for violating that law. He is then cursed to wander as an undead spirit and watch all the temples being destroyed or repurposed into, all traces of the Silence being forgotten. Shortly after Driscoll is contained, Iskafar’s vision changes to that of Samantha, arms outstretched and placing a helmet on his head. Her flesh begins to ripple and change again as she gurgles out “Unleash…. Your….. Curse!” before collapsing to the floor as the transformation takes her once again. Free from mental influences, Iskafar rethreads fate to have a copy of himself, one with the cursed axe, one with the solar axe. The cursed axe becomes aware of the situation, its perception filled with the untold number of souls that compose Bolothamogg, and it tears free from Iskafar and stealing his warlock essence as it rapidly spreads through the bright expanse, pockets of darkness feeding on the light, and then receding as the light of Bolothamogg fights back.

The physical form of Bolothamogg fades as they hear the voice in their heads, clearly distracted, say “Noooo, what have you done!! This entity should not be here!” The party all freed from their mental cages, Ignys taking advantage of the distraction to pull out his luck sword and he wishes for the arcane knowledge to successfully cast the ritual of the amber prison to contain the entities. His mind fills to overflowing with arcane concepts and he quickly lays out the crystal residue and conjures a diagram on the ground to suffice for the ritual. With precision and wisdom born of the wish spell, he utters the incantations of the ritual, withstands the psychic assault that comes from the realization of what he is attempting, and sets in motion the amber encasement of Bolothamogg. The ritual complete, the arcane knowledge bleeds from his mind. They see the amber walls forming all around them and the worms and stone begin to turn to steam and mist. Driscoll rushes to Samantha and casts a remove curse spell to halt any transformation, and they run out of the brilliant chamber, the walls disintegrating at their touch as they flee towards the shark vessel.

They make it back on board as the Pyramid is rapidly dissipating, large amounts of amber compressing and containing it. Ignys being too wounded to risk connecting to the crystal again, Iskafar volunteers and suffers a large shock, but manages to hold on and speed them away as the orange light of the realm dims, the black stars appearing to wink out all around them in the distance. They activate the crystal to switch dimensions, reappearing in the deep ocean of the material realm. The divinatorium does not report anything on the alternate dimension.

Epilogue:

They rest and recover over the 10 day journey back to Neverwinter. The psychic barrier around the land now gone, trade resumes and the city will recover once more, as it always does. 

Samantha, free of her curse, bids the party farewell and heads back to find what has become of her family.

Ignys travels with Iskafar to visit Iskafar’s mother and see the magnificent mazes and labyrinths that she creates, and then heads back to his own family in Ashbourne manor to aid in the implementation of the newfound balance of frost and flame together in their practices. 

Iskafar returns home for a time, but stripped of his warlock powers, and desiring the decadence of luxury, he sets back out adventuring, this time on the path of the bard.   

Driscoll returns to the temples of the Silence to incorporate all that he has learned and to help as many as he can. He invites Iltharian into the order if he wishes.

Iltharian accepts and begins on the path of a Paladin of the Silence.

[ask-de-writer]

DARING DO and the ADVENTURE of the X'IBIAN VASE! : MLP Fan Fiction : Part 20 of 21

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Daring Do

and the Adventure of the X'ibian Vase!

by

De Writer (Glen Ten-Eyck)

And

Carmen Pondiego

Cover Art by

Doctor Dimension

52630 words

© 2015 by Glen Ten-Eyck

Writing begun 08/26/15

All rights reserved.  This document may not be copied or distributed on or to any medium or placed in any mass storage system except by the express written consent of the author.

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Copyright fair use rules for Tumblr users

Users of Tumblr.com are specifically granted the following rights.  They may reblog the story.  They may use the characters or original characters in my settings for fan fiction, fan art works, cosplay, or fan musical compositions, provided that such things are done without charge.  I will allow those who do commission art works to charge for their images.  

All sorts of fan art, cosplay, music or fictions is actively encouraged.

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The party began to descend the causeway, Daring Do in the lead.  She carefully sifted chalk powder on trap trigger stones in both causeway and the wall.  Tyranny, seeing that Robber had out a large knife, did not even try to touch any of them.

They reached the stone platform at the bottom of the causeway without further incident.  If you do not count the three small trickles of blood on Tyranny’s coat where Robber poked him with the knife as incidents, that is.

Unappologetic, Robber just said, “I thought that he was starting to put a hoof where he should not.

“It looks like an easy walk to the place where we can begin uncovering the tomb door.  That makes me suspect that it is not safe at all.”

Sang He nodded agreement.  “You alone of your compatriots, Mister Robber, appear to have learned some wisdom.  You are correct.  That easy appearing patch of sand between here and the tomb of Im Farst is quite dangerous.

“Doctor Do is preparing to take to the air to scout whether the sand lions that we know are here can be coped with.”

As Daring Do was stripping away her pack, saddle bags and anything else that might slow or interfere with her flight, Tyranny snorted, “Sand lions!  Those are a myth!  They have never been documented by any reputable scientific authority.”

Sang He and the rest of her herd ignored him, while efficiently readying their rifles.  They began to aim them out over the seemingly empty sand.  Daring Do lifted off to the flutter of strong wings.

Moderately high up, she circled, scrutinizing the sand below.  She stooped into a dive, like a striking hawk!  She hit the sand, bunched and leaped high, wings driving for all that they were worth!

Only a few meters from her striking point, the sand erupted in a fury of raking claws, snapping fangs and a leaping blotched tan and white monster.  Daring Do was up, out of its reach ~ barely!

As Daring Do swept up and about, the now revealed sand lion kept pace beneath her.  Robber commented sarcastically, “That looks like a real myth to me!  At least as real as the Heart of Discord.”

Gaining on the pursuing beast, Daring Do dived again!  Her thump as she hit this time drew, not one, but three of the hidden monsters!  Soon she was leading a ravening pack away from the causeway and the expedition.

Tyranny tried to self-importantly bustle out onto the now “safe” sands.

Bullets blasted past him!  The sand lion that did not follow Daring Do was ripped by flying lead!  It emitted an unearthly roaring scream as it collapsed in a pool of its own gore.  The thirsty sand soaked up its gore as the beast died, half out of the sand that hid it from sight.

Jeremy, a smoking rifle of his own in hoof, was hugging a dromedary.  “That was wonderful shooting, Shu!  You took out its spine right through its open mouth!”

Shu was returning the hug, delighting in his praise.

Tyranny saw the hug and curled a lip.  “Can’t you stop disgusting us by your perversion?”

Soree and the entire herd all froze.  As one, they turned their backs on him.  Shocked, Tyranny saw that Robber had joined them and Ovethrow was refusing to meet his eye.

Shu, still holding Jeremy, observed, “I must offer my apologies to the dung beetles.  That unworthy creature has not earned their august company.”

Sang He, turned to Tyranny, rifle lowered to aim directly at him.  All of the others followed suit. Jeremy, standing beside Sehang Shu, had his rifle aimed too. Soree pulled her talwar and even Robber had his knife aimed at him.

Sang He demanded, “Precede us across the sands or die here and now.”

Quaking with fear, Tyranny asked, “What if there is another one like that?”

Sang He half lidded her eyes and replied, “Then we will kill it.  If it kills you first or not is of no importance at all.  GO!”

The rest followed Tyranny at a small distance as they made their way across the sands.  The passage was made without any further problem beyond maintaining footing in the slippery sands.

They were climbing onto the outcrops of sandstone that shielded the ruins of the ancient complex.  Jeremy’s rifle barked once.  The sand lion that was up in the rocks a bit above them tumbled down to flop in a blotched heap of tan and whitish fur at their hooves.

There was a flurry of wings as Daring Do landed among the party.  She paused to examine the kill at close range.  She shifted the massive head and examined the structure of the jaws and fangs.  “Soree, dear.  I need good sketches of this.  See how these fangs are set in the jaws?  See how these ears work to keep the sand out while it is below the surface?  We need this documented very carefully.”

Soree began to make many sketches of the dead beast.

Daring Do turned her attention to the stones ahead of them and smiled.  Taking Jeremy by the hoof, she pointed.  “See that, Jeremy?  It was made to look natural but it is not at all!  We are at the outskirts of the tomb complex!”

The others fell back and let their acknowledged expert check out the way ahead.  Daring Do led the way, her wings slightly raised.  A short ways into a defile, they were faced with fallen rubble partly covering an ancient lintel over what appeared to be a door.

Standing in the small defile, Daring Do took out a paper and compared the time worn characters carved on the lintel piece to what she had.  Nodding in deep thought, she began to back out with the greatest care.

Tyranny demanded, “What is the hold up?  All that we have to do is pry and dig out those fallen rocks and force the door!”

Kanya Ama put a hoof over her eyes in frustration as she suggested, “Eater of dung beetle leavings, please go and jump about on the sand.  We would like to see if those mythical sand lions have returned.”

Sehang Shu condescendingly offered, “If Doctor Do is getting away from there, one may presume an excellent reason.  This could be trapped, a false entrance, or both.  Please tell us where your brain was buried when it died.  We need a latrine.”

Robber joined in the general chuckle.  Tyranny fumed.

Daring Do, out of the slot, commented, “Note this place well, Soree.  I want your best sketches.  We will return here later.  This is where the tomb’s workforce was interred.  The stones here are not trapped.  They were merely meant to be sure that any who survived the drug could not escape.”  

Sang He and the rest of the herd bowed their heads in respect.

After the moment of silence, Sang He suggested, “So, shall we search around on this bluff to find the true Auspicious South where the entrance most likely is?”

Daring Do nodded.  “Yes, my friend.  That is what we must do.”

As the party worked their way through a maze of broken and fallen stone, it was the sharp eyes of Kanya Ama who spotted it.  “Look!  Up there! They must have had some sort of bridge that was removed after the doors were sealed.”

She was pointing up.  There was a ledge with barely visible stone works to its back.  Daring Do spread her wings and flew up near to it, verifying that it was indeed the place that they were searching for.

She landed in a jubilant mood.  “That is it!  We have the true entrance to the tomb!  Thanks, Kanya Ama!”  Daring Do hugged the big dromedary.

Using Jeremy’s grapnels and ropes, it did not take long to rig a rope ladder up to the ledge.  Tyranny watched, mouth agape, as the clumsy seeming dromedaries swarmed up the ladder without effort.  Jeremy and Soree followed, showing an agility that he had never imagined.  Robber and Overthrow worked their way up without undue problems, though they were clearly not comfortable with the task.

Tyranny began his climb.  He struggled to find his footing on the loose, dangling ropes of the ladder.  Several times he missed with a hoof and had to feel about to get secure.  Looking down, he froze.  

His terrified screams caused the others to put their heads over the ledge to watch.  Sang He observed, “It is obstructing our ladder!  Perhaps if we shake the ladder, the bug will come loose so that we can use it.”

Sehang Shu pointed out, “The splatter of its fluids could contaminate the site.  Since we are being paid a share of the value estimate, that could lower our income!”

There was a flurry of other, similar commentary, punctuated by laughter.  It was the laughter that reached Tyranny.  Gritting his teeth against his fear, he struggled and fought his way to the top.

Now he could see what the others already had.  The tomb entrance was carved with a female Draconequis as one pillar of the doorway and a dromedary was the other. The Dromedary’s  bearing was so noble that even Tyranny could feel it. Together, they upheld what could only be a representation of the sky itself.

Soree, ignoring all of the byplay, was working on careful sketches both of the whole and detail copies of various portions.

Seeing the unguarded doors of the tomb proper, Tyranny began to stride confidently forward to push them open.  The realization that ALL of the others were silently taking cover stopped him!

As he turned to say, “What are you afraid of?” a missile shot past him, just barely scratching the skin of his neck!  The missile did not clatter on the stone below.  It silently vanished when it failed of its target.  That, more than the trap itself caused Tyranny to stop in wide eyed shock.

Sehang Shu called derisively, “I told you, OUR MAGIC WORKS!  Please go toward the doors again!  We have a betting pool on how many traps you will trigger before you are killed!”

Shaken, he backed away from the deadly doors.

The others emerged from their cover.  Sehang Shu set up the portable stove and began to fix rice and dried vegetables for Jeremy, Soree and Daring Do.  She called quietly, “Mister Robber, would you care for a portion too?  You have earned my respect and may share our camp if you wish.”

Robber paused, bowed deeply and asked, “What of the rest of your herd?  What do they say?”

Sang He spoke for the rest, giving him a bow of equals, “The affront was to Sehang Shu.  If she has forgiven you so far as to share with you, then so shall we.”

Robber then returned her bow, replying, “It would be my honor to share food with you.  I have little to offer in return, only a single ration of cheese that dried out and has crumbled to small lumps.  The dried bread crusts that we had, Tyranny abandoned somewhere along the way.”

Sehang Shu invited, “Share what you may.  The cheese will rehydrate along with the rice and vegetables.  It will add an excellent flavor for my dear and his friends.”

Without further comment, Robber handed over the small packet of crumbled cheese.

Robber was surprised when Daring Do and Jeremy moved aside to make room for him.

Jeremy, studying the doors, asked Daring Do, “How many traps have you spotted so far?  I count six.”

Robber stared at the innocent seeming doors and shook his head.  “I am glad that your group is here.  Tyranny would have got us all killed before we ever got this far.  I can’t even see the one that shot the missile at Tyranny and I know that it is there.”

Sehang Shu nodded, “They are difficult to detect.  Doctor Do’s class, Temple and Tomb Guardians 406, is a great help.  We took it by Magic Net after assisting her with the Darkling’s Tomb and the area survey.  Our ancestors were very ingenious.”

Daring Do nodded acknowledgment.  “They were indeed, Sehang Shu.  Jeremy, there are in fact six.  You spotted them all. There is one for each of the cardinal points of the ancient X'ibian compass.

“At least these are not as dangerous as the ancient Rune Work of Baratted the Goat during the Nightmare Wars.  Those are deadly.”

Jeremy shuddered.  “I know.  Circle Lake and Crescent Lake in central Equestria were his work.  They are each just over thirty kilometers across.”

Sehang Shu interrupted.  Smiling, she announced, “The meal is ready!  Mister Robber, your cheese addition smells good!  Thank you!”  She began to serve out four bowls, one for each of the ponies and the horse before her.  Smiling happily, she served Jeremy his bowl first.

Daring Do smiled as she watched Jeremy get his bowl from Sehang Shu.  She and Soree were next.  Robber waited to last and took his bowl with a bow of thanks.

As Robber sat to eat, Tyranny stomped over and demanded, “You have to share that with …”  His demand was silenced by a meaty thud!  Sehang Shu pulled her leg back calmly from the hard strike that took Tyranny off his hooves and sent him tumbling to a wall.  Robber, eyes wide, bowed to her, “I thank you, Sehang Shu.  He was carrying our dried crusts and other rations.  He left them somewhere on the way.  He has no right to any of your food.  I have no right either but that of your invitation.”

Sehang Shu nodded.  “That is so, Mister Robber.  We have a saying that goes, he who casts away what he has, has no right to what others may have.”

Daring Do was looking at the whole problem of the door traps.  Suddenly she smiled.  Taking out a piece of paper, she sketched a few things and made quick notes.  Jeremy realized that her quick notes were in ancient X'ibian!

She showed her notes to Sang He.  The dromedary’s eyes flew open in surprise.  “Of course!  There are six cardinal points to the ancient compass.  They all meet at the center!”

As swiftly as their luncheon was done, Kanya Ama began to creep forward on her belly. It was amazing how close to the ground so large a being as she could get.  

Sang He and Daring Do were coaching her, “A bit to the left!  Not quite so much!  There!  Perfect!  Now raise the target!”

Kanya Ama hesitated before raising a cut out on a stick. Robber giggled.  The cut out was a quite good likeness of Tyranny’s silhouette.  It was suddenly shredded as a stabbing blade trap, a missile trap, a falling stone, a swinging weight, a slashing blade and a pit opening all triggered at once!

Kanya Ama was laying in the only spot not struck, slashed, smashed or dropped!  All of the ancient traps slammed into each other and fell into the pit.  Seconds later, the pit closed.

With a groan like the weight of millennia was holding them back, the tomb doors yawned wide.  There, exposed to the light of day for the first time in three thousand years, was a long corridor leading downward into the depths of the burial complex.

Tyranny started for the opening.  The multiple clacks of rifles behind him being cocked and safeties released stopped him.

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[bilobasblogs]

What I’ve Accomplished and Learned in 2019

My fear of making this post and, in turn, solidifying my entire year’s-worth of lessons has brought a slight feel of malaise into the back of my mind; something I’d think of for a moment then try to forget about because of how exposing and ‘final’ it may feel. It made me feel a bit sick thinking about. Maybe because I felt like.. I had something to live up to? A certain criteria to meet? Maybe so.

All that being said, I’ve somehow, by the grace of God, motivated myself enough to write this in full. As the title implies, this is a (somewhat) cohesive list of what I’ve both accomplished and learned in this last year, 2019. I’m not sure if I will do this every year or not, but eventually I did realize it’s something I have to do for myself, and for my journey of self-evaluation. That's why I gave in. So without further ado, let’s move on to the first on my list. :’)

ACCOMPLISHMENTS:

1. Removing myself from a toxic situation: A storytime.

Let me elaborate on that a little, so you’re not so lost.. Anyways! Back in 2017, I struggled a lot with depression and thoughts of self-hatred, even suicide. My home life has never been great, but at that point I had lost all my IRL friends and was alone. To make a long story short, I turned to Instagram as a home for my friendless self. I joined fandoms and posted regularly, but it led to me making friends with very manipulative and toxic people. And it wasn’t healthy. I would talk to them everyday, all the time. Eventually, everything came to a grand finale when my closest friend accused me of hacking/stealing his account that I apparently ‘had the password to’. (I had an old password. It was changed so I could no longer use the old one) He blasted me all over his account with a decent following, calling me names, and getting his friends to DM me messages of physical-appearance shaming. Top it all off with a “Go rot in hell or whateva” message from him, and I basically lost everything I thought I loved. I made a vow to myself that I wouldn’t end up in that situation ever again. I promised to focus on me, myself, and my mental health ONLY, in 2019. And I’d say I accomplished that. I’m proud of myself for that.

I was originally going to put this in the “things I’ve learned” category, but because of how big a deal this was, it had to be delved into a little deeper. And it ends with a big accomplishment; the restoration of my sense of self-worth and ability to appreciate myself. I’d call that a win!

2. Finally getting that new computer I needed.

Okay, not much of an accomplishment.. But I added it on this list because of how long I’ve actually had my previous computer. Probably for more than 5 years, if I’m being honest. It was an old, rusty, 32-bit disaster running Windows 7. The main motivation for me getting a computer was not actually how slow or glitchy it was, but it was because I bought Sonic Adventure 2 on Steam and couldn’t play it on my PC. I was pissed so convinced my parents to help me get a new one. Now I bask in all my Chao World Extended mod glory!

3. Concert tickets get!

Shortly after getting my new computer at the beginning of the year, my favorite artist and songwriter, Marina, returned to the music industry after a 3-4 year hiatus. As soon as a supporting tour was announced, I knew I had to get those damn tickets. It had been too long since the last tour, there was no way I was passing this one up! So after months of begging my dad, he FINALLY ordered them and we attended, not just any concert, but my FIRST live show ever. Forever grateful for that experience... for the most part. Eh, I’ll get back to that story later. On to the next!

4. Not one, but TWO dental surgeries!

Yes, it’s true. I actually got my braces on this year (my teeth were abysmal, to say the least...) and had to get two separate dental surgeries to remove my teeth. One for wisdom teeth, one for my back molars. This was to make room for my teeth separating and straightening out. It was hell. But not because of the recovery process, but because of how anxious I was while I was getting put out for the surgery. They kept trying to get me to fall asleep and I kept on talking! I was actually scared as the world went black, but before I knew it, I was lying in my bed at home in severe pain. Ahh, good times.

5. Self-expression and my venture into deviantART..

I’ve saved this one for last, as I feel it’s the thing that benefited me the most this year. I’ve taken the time to figure out what makes me feel creatively realized as a person. What makes me happy? What makes me feel good after I’m completely finished? I’ve learned that two things check those boxes: Drawing and writing. Even more specifically, songwriting.

I always had known from my earliest years that I wanted to be an artist. I clearly had the passion and was willing to always learn and grow. I never cried over ‘failing’ as a child, I always just wanted to do better. I think that quality pays off for me in the long run, because in January this year, I created my deviantART account. I was in need of something to fulfill me after the loss of my friends, and it seemed that making a DA was the the right thing. It combined social and artistic aspects, which was perfect for me. Now I have a fantastic, small little following on a profile where I just draw fun NiGHTS, Sonic, and Crash Bandicoot doodles. I’m really happy now.

LESSONS I’VE LEARNED:

1. Never let somebody tell me my character, unless I know them extremely well and vice versa. I know myself well enough, and shouldn’t think differently of myself just because somebody else does.

2. Along those same lines, always listen to my gut. Never let a whisper here or a quip there influence me when I have a deep gut feeling about something.

3. An error and a mistake are not the same things. An error is when I fall down, which all humans do because we’re imperfect creatures. A mistake is when I choose not to get up and learn from the error as a lesson. A lesson will also be repeated again and again until it is learned and I decide to pull myself off the ground and continue going.

4. True forgiveness does not mean “I accept what you caused to occur”, it is saying “I accept that it has happened, and I’m letting go of the past I thought I wanted. And I am willing to move and do something with what I learned.”

5. There are two different ways to say sorry. First, is when you say sorry but actually mean “please forget whatever I just did”. The second is genuine and is when you say sorry and mean “I apologize for the wrong that I did, and am willing to learn and move on from it.”

6. I cannot shut myself down in front of people. I can’t shut people out. If I do that, I lose out on a precious time that could be spent with other amazing people. Sometimes it can seem like investing will lead to heartbreak, but it won’t always be like that. I have to invest, but I won’t invest in more than I can afford to lose.

7. Sometimes it’s better to let myself be wrong and learn than to try to be correct and refuse to grow.

Alrighty! That’s all I could think of for this very long, personal post. I know I don’t talk about my personal life too much on social media, so I wanted to make this end-of-year recap for myself so I don’t forget the lessons I’ve learned along my journey. If you got something out of this.. yay! I’ve sorta accomplished my goal! I also understand if this was boring as hell to read. But it’s special to me and I don’t want to forget 2019. David of the future will thank me later.

Anyway.. here’s to an even better and more fantastic 2020! Goodbye 2010s, I forever love you. The majority of my life has happened in the 2010s, and I’ve made so many memories in this decade. From the growth and blooming of the internet and memes, to more real/raw things like personal self-growth. I’ve gained a lot and lost a lot, but in the end I’m thankful for it all. I hope everyone’s holiday season was amazing and I wish you a great upcoming New Years into the next decade! Talk to you next time, loves.

much love, bilobasideya 💜

[dietaku]

Chapter 6: Video Games Have the Deepest Lore

I’ve been wanting to do this chapter for a while, so I hope you enjoy it! Also, Adventures of Hourai High is not only real, it’s perhaps my favorite SNES jRPG. It’s definitely worth checking out!

I stood up, dusting myself off, as I spied the quiet hamlet we tumbled into. A quaint village lay before us, with three large buildings standing before us. As I looked back at my friends, Zechs groaned.

“I landed on my keys,” he whimpered, removing his shades as he staggered to his feet. Jake loomed over him, arms crossed, as he helped Errin and Potato up.

“Zechs, about that motorbike, is that the ChromeBuster?” he asked, as Zechs nodded.

“Yup!” he beamed.

“Zechs,” Jake sighed, uncrossing his arms just to knead his brow,”WHY are you using a real cash item like the ChromeBuster?”

“B-because I liked the aesthetic. Plus, I got a special on the items, and I got the platinum gems, and...Oh crap, I shouldn't have told you that,” Zechs muttered, as Jake loomed over him.

“Zechs, did you have platinum gems, and you didn't tell us?” Jake asked pointedly.

“Um...Yes?”

“And you forced me to work for more?” I joined in, as Zechs stepped back from us.

“W-Well, I didn't want to spend my hundred thou on stuff for the guild. That was for me,” he protested, as Jake, Potato and I looked at each other, then back to him. Only Errin and Jun, patting each other down and laughing at their good fortune for surviving, didn't join in the unspoken judgment of our Breaker.

Jake then kneaded his brow once more, and said some incredibly rude things to Zechs, which naturally drew Jun's attention.

“Ms. Errin, what does it mean to F*** a goat like the dirty W*** you are, you cantankerous C***?” he asked, as Errin shook her head rapidly.

“Good boys shouldn't use those words,” she said, as he nodded gravely, understanding the temerity of Zechs' transgression. I sighed, shaking my head.

“Does this mean I don't need to 'earn' my keep now?” I asked tersely, as Jake shoot his head.

“No, this one will, though,” Jake growled,  pulling Zechs up by the scuffs of his coat.

“Please, no! I wouldn't survive working with my body!” he wailed, as Jake laughed cruelly.

“Oh, don't worry, you'll earn your keep  from here,” Jake pointed cruelly down to Zechs' backside as he went white with fear.

“Y-You don't mean--”

“Oh, for the love of---I mean your wallet, you dingus!” Jake corrected, as Zechs sighed with relief. I ignored the continuing banter as I looked up. Before me sprawled a large city square, hemmed in by three large objects. Before me rose a dense forest of fir trees, and bizarre reddish shrubs I couldn't put a name to. The lone path inside this dense bramble marked the spot as the meeting site of the Wardens of Nature. To its left loomed a Gothic castle, made all the more spooky by its apparent emptiness. Despite seemingly abandoned, the masonry looked in god repair, and even several of the gargoyles were patched with fresh cement. The welcome mat before the castle gate denoted it the home of the Soldiers of Virtue. To my right stood a dilapidated stone building. With crumbling walls, hoary bronze gates and two wizened lion statues guarding its doors, the sad plaque emblazoned on the gate identified the site as the meeting place of the Scholars of Wisdom..

“So, this is what the princess meant by the three Great Societies, I suppose,” I mused, as the others caught up with me,” Did you all know about this?”

Jake and Potato nodded, while Zechs shrugged, and Errin and Jun looked at each other quizzically.

“Of course I knew about Treisegen. I was honestly wondering when we were going to end up here. Potato and are both Soldiers of Virtue. What Society are you part of, Zechs? Jake asked, as Zechs coughed.

“Well, I, uh, y'know...The thing is, I'm very busy, and....I never joined any,” Zechs admitted, not looking at him.

“Well, you are today. You're gonna join the Soldiers of Virtue! Where are you headed, then, Dieter?”

I tapped my chin,” I'm not too wild on the Soldiers of Virtue or Scholars of Wisdom. I guess I'll settle for the Wardens of Nature.”

“I suppose I ought to join the Scholars of Wisdom,” Errin said, as Jun trotted behind her,” And I suppose Jun is coming with me?”

“Yes, I want to learn,” he grinned, as I chuckled, tousling his hair.

“You listen to Ms. Errin, okay?” I told him, as he excitedly nodded, trotting off as I waved.

“We'll let you get situated, and we can plan further tonight,” Jake called, as I gave him a thumbs up. Trotting off onto the path into the woods, I soon found myself in a small clearing, where a skinny bald man lounged on a tall rock before me. He was notable partially for his seat, but what really drew my attention was his striking garb; his modesty held by a furry tiger loincloth.

“Oi, you here to join up?” he asked, as I nodded.

“You know, this place is, like, serious and stuff, it's not just a place for orgies and the like,” he called, as I shot him a glare.

“What was that for?”

“Oh, nothing,” he waved off my retort,” Just most Floof Clanners who join clique up and just want to spend all their time together rather than partaking in Nature's sweet mysteries.”

I crossed my arms,” I've no interest all that. Show me what you got.”

He grinned,” That's what I like to hear. Follow me.”

Leading me through the forest along a small path, he stopped as the forest opened up around a large pool of...

“Mud?” I asked, scanning the clearing. Before me was a pit of bubbling gray emitting a pungent odor. Feeling dizzy just being around this bubbling pit, the man sighed.

“Oh, it's no good. No good, no sirree,” He grumbled.

“What's no good?”

As if to answer his question the mud rumbled, and a large beast rose out of the mud, a gigantic, squat beast with dark fur. It yawned, revealing broad, flat teeth from its grand, bulbous maw.

“A Hippopotomuds,” the man warned,” It moved into the mud beds since the last time we initiated a new member. You better rough it up to get it out of here.”

“I suppose,” I frowned, rolling up my sleeves as I strode forward. My fist swirled with the chill of air sucking away; the skill I learned in my battle with Marmalade.

“FIRST ATTACK! VACUUM FIST,” I roared, hitting the beast cleanly with my skill. I felt my skill reverberate through my foe's thick body, as it lazily looked up at me, and smacked me away with its large head.

“Ugh, I guess this means I was correct after all. Vaccum Fist really is useless after all. Take that, Jake!” I grimaced, jumping to my feet and back into the battle. “SCREAMING JETTER KICK,” I hissed, battering the muddy monster with explosive kicks. Alighting back on my feet from my tempestuous fusillade of strikes, I clenched my fist. Now, this is the end, baddy! BRUTAL SHRIKE DA--! I managed as my fist lurched back, as if hitting an invisible barrier,” BRUTAL SHRIKE DA--. BRUTAL SHRIKE DA--! WHY ISN'T THIS WORKING?” I wailed, as I looked through my vision at my Art Cells, now completely filled with arrows. In my haste, I completely forgot about  the limitations of Art Cells.

“You okay?” the man called, as I snorted.

“This is nothing,” I smirked, dong my best to hide my worry. Art Cells degenerated after ten seconds, and I currently possessed nine. To do my most basic skill, Screaming Jetter Kick, required two. Making the next twenty seconds the most critical to my well-being The Hippopotomuds rose from the mud, and snorted, its glare zeroing on me, as it slowly stomped forward, shaking its large head menacingly. Leaping aside did little as its snout caught me, hurling me into a tree. Using the momentum, I jumped back into action, only to be batted aside.

“Perhaps boasting about this wasn't the best thing,” I muttered, stabbing myself in the chest with Kindly Jab. Thankful my team skills didn't require any Art Cells, I looked up at my Art Cell Line, just in time to see two open up. Grinning manically, I leaped forward with a madman, sweeping forward with my kick.

“SCREAMING. JETTER. KICK,” I keened, slamming my kick into the beast as it groaned in pain. Slowly rising, it shuffled off, as I stood victorious.

“Yeah, you better run!” I called, turning to the man,” So, what's with this mud, anyways?”

“Oh, you just need to bathe in the mud. That way you'll receive Nature's blessing upon you.”

“And this isn't anything weird?”

He laughed,” Oh, no, not weird at all!”

I sighed with relief and looked over the steaming cauldron of mud for a moment, before removing my gi and shoes as I turned back around, finding the man casually watching me.

“...What are you doing?” I asked testily.

“Just ensuring you're actually entering the mud properly. You really ought to wear as little as possible,” he opined, as I snorted. I wasn't removing my bindings and fundoshi.

“Whatever, weirdo,” I grumbled, slipping into the mud.

“My name is actually Gribbs. I'm the guide to the Wardens. Now, relax and enjoy your initiation, newbie,” he cackled, disappearing into the brush. As I settled into the mud, I sighed, enjoying the warmth on my bare skin as I sighed contentedly. Despite the odd smell, the mud felt nice and the pleasant morning sun shone pleasantly upon me. Slipping deeper into the mud, I felt more and more lightheaded, as the sunbeams danced and visions shone before my eyes. A pair of women stood over me, arguing with each other, shoving each other back and forth, one an auburn haired Floof with an impressive set of tails, while the other I recognized as Ayin He, the War Goddess. The pair shrieked at one another in a language I couldn't make out, before they disappeared as swiftly as they appeared. In their stead, I saw the auburn haired Floof woman once more,  surrounded by adoring human women adorned in beautiful silk gowns. They were soon replaced by an ever increasing procession of Floof men and women, which finally ended in a man and woman who included Deegal's mother. The others disappeared, and Deegal's mother revealed a small bundle from behind her, as the two looked despondent. Eventually, the man left, leaving the woman in her own despair. However, just as she too left, a flash of sunlight hit the small bundle, and a tiny arm rose up, from its depths grasping at her. Realizing what happened, Deegal's mother scooped up the bundle crying tears of joy, and I realized what it all meant.

I was that bundle. Oh, God. Does this mean.....

Before I could continue this train of thought, new visions assaulted me; a tower in the center of a bustling nation, with happy, contented people, only to be swept aside by waves of flame and descending angels. Those who survived were branded with painful reminders of this transgression, as the Earth itself was slowly scoured. Then, ten stars alighted in the sky, and as quickly as it began, this apocalypse ended. Further visions haunted me, from a distinguished Loppo woman garbed in silver and red robes descending to a city of pagodas and fearful Pan'Tou. Then, at last, a single Loppo fell from the moon gracefully, to a grand city with  a castle and a sprawling city, which I recognized as Grafzou.

“So, this is it, then. I'm just a magnet for bad luck, then. First I can't even be born correctly, and now this Loppo man from before. It seems there is no rest for me,” I thought,” Well, excpt maybe Jun. He's a good boy.”

I floated in this pleasant fugue for what seemed like hours before I blinked in the evening sun, as I felt the mud shift beside me. Rising to my full height, I gasped when I saw my neighbor. Beside me sat Dennis, grinning at me sleepily.

“Why do you always show up whenever I pass out?” I demanded, as Dennis tapped her cheek thoughtfully.

“I dunno! Why do you keep passing out around me?” she asked, nonchalantly.

I snorted,” Whatever, what do you want, anyways?”

“How rude! I'm a Warden of Nature, too! I just saw you in the pool of initiation, and I thought I'd join you,” she smiled, flashing a ring on her finger.

“What's with that ring?”

“Oh, this?” she smiled,” This is the Eternal Communion Ring you gave me, to symbolize our union.”

“Our what?” I asked.

“Our Union. When you were celebrating your adulthood with Pai Zuri, you and I enjoyed some time together, and it was then you told me,” I'm sorry you've been alone. You're really pretty when you smile, I'll be there with you. Forever.” You then gave me this ring as a symbol of this promise. I decided to let you have some time to yourself. I'm a kind wife, you see,” she smiled, as I blanched,” Oh, do you want to be the wife, then?”

“I...No,” I sighed. I didn't recall anything about that night, save my attempts to sing Qwest. I know, I know, it was cliche choice, but if I didn't sing “Don't Stop Doubting” badly, then who would? Still, this just raised more questions than it answered, and my concern must;ve showed on my face, as worry crossed over her face, as she fidgeted with her hands hurriedly.

“So...Are you denying it?” she ventured, as I shook my head slowly.

“No. I won't take back that if I did tell you that. Do whatever you want. I-I just don't remember, is all,” I mumbled. If I did tell her that, then who was I to back out now? That was the way my arents taught me, so I'd stick to my word, even if I regretted whatever drunken promises I made.  Donning my clothes as I climbed out of the pool, they quickly slipped off my skin,” W-what the hell?”

Dennis giggled, pointing at my shoulder, now covered in a faint green swirling tattoo. Sure enough such flourishes covered my body as I looked myself over.

“Those are Nature Seals, the mark of initiation into the Wardens of Nature. To have those upon your body counts as clothing. You can only be garbed with very special and specific clothing,” she replied, as my heart sank.

“And how do I remove these, then?”

“You have to be fully initiated into the Wardens of Nature. Then they'll disappear.”

“Oh,” I sighed. Looking over my gear, I found only one armor was compatible with the Nature Seals: Aharel's Maidservant String. I groaned inwardly as I donned the slinky garment, Looking myself over, It seemed everything was in order, even if I suspected I was barely R-rated. Dennis looked me over with a small smirk, before tossing her blue cloak over herself.

“h, it's easy for you. You have a cloak,” I growled, as she tossed it off.

“What does it matter? We're here in the Wardens of Nature. No one will arrest us, and it's not like I'll catch cold. I'm an Ishtar Theurge. Why bother with the judgment of others? You're strong and beautiful, so take comfort in that,” she shrugged.

“D-do you really mean that?” I whispered.

“Of course! You and I are linked now. I would never lie to you,” she smiled, as I paused, thinking on her words.

“She's right. We're only with other Wardens here. Besides, what does it matter what others think? I'm the strongest among my party, anyways! I should enjoy this new freedom!” I thought. My epiphany must've shown on my face as Dennis brightened as well.

“C'mon, I want to see more of this place,” I motioned for her, rushing off into the woods. She and I ran through the woods, coming across numerous other Wardens as they contemplated Nature, planted trees or enjoyed the sun through the boughs of the trees. After frolicking, we finally sat down on a grassy hill and listened to Gribbs speak to several other Wardens below us.

“Nature itself has no morals, merely accepting what is. It is for this reason alone that we must preserve it. Humanity has its morals and values, and that is fine, but the only moral Nature teaches us is Life is sacred and must be preserved. This of course means other lives must end, but that is the beauty of Nature, to see that those with Will, Luck and Strength live. So, Life and the pursuit of its continuation is the one Virtue we espouse. All others are your own personal goals, and will be accepted as Nature accepts all, but do not confuse your own values with that of Nature's Will,” he warned, droning on and on about such philosophical points. As the sun dipped beneath the horizon, I left the woods alongside Dennis, as I found the others camping around a small fire.

“Oh, wow, Dieter. I didn't know it was my birthday,” Zechs called, looking up as I paused, unsure what he meant. Dennis giggled, and as his meaning dawned on me, I growled back at him loudly.

“Momma, why are you dressed like you're gong to the beach?” Jun asked, as I knelt down and tousled his hair.

“I had to do some things today near some mud pits. I didn't want to get my clothes dirty, I explained, as I scowled.

“I wanna t'go to the beach, too,” he grumbled.

I patted him on the head,” When we're done here, we can go to the beach.”

“You promise?”

I beamed,” I promise!”

“Oooooh, who is this?” Dennis asked, sidling up beside me.

“I'm Jun. I'm a Rancher. Who are you?” He asked bluntly.

“She's a friend of mine, Jun. I want you to be her friend, too, okay?”

He nodded, rummaging through his pocket, before revealing a glass rose he handed to Dennis.

“A Porcelain Rose! You can only find those in the Subterranean Depths! Thank you, you're quire the gentleman,” she patted him  on the head as he chuckled proudly.

“Once again, the little kid gets all the attention,” Zechs grumbled.

“Well, then, what did you learn from your time with the Soldiers of Virtue?” I asked.

Zechs shrugged,” Not much. I was taken to their inner sanctum and told about their history. Then I saw the mausoleum of their four founders, and saw their mummies. You'd never guess it, but they were these weird Qwibon-man things. And they all had extremely radical names, too, like Thomas, George, John and Benjamin.”

“Things were different back during the Green Age, Zechs. Lots of things were different,” Jake stated sagaciously, as Errin looked up from her soup, clearly impressed.

“Oh? That's very impressive that you know all that,” she called, as Jake shrugged.

“I just know that since I read all the fluff text for items and quests. Unlike these two,” he scowled, pointing at Zechs and myself.

“Hey! I have things I gotta do! I don't care what dead guy decided to mix mushrooms and Healing Herbs together to make potions,” I countered, as Jake shook his head.

“Then what have you learned?” he asked.

I paused, choosing my words as I spoke,” I...I realized we may not be in a game. This may be entirely real.”

“Bullshit,” Jake spat,” Entirely bullshit. How can this be real? This isn't the real world, and all this magic, these gods and demons? How can any of this be real?”

“Yes,I know! It's crazy, but, Jake, listen! I've seen things. I've met Deegal's mother, and I honestly think this may be a real world all its own. There's too many little things that tell me this! The trash on the street, the way people talk to us, the fact that they have bathrooms! Do you even REMEMBER a game that has bathrooms coded in?”

“Adventures of Hourai High has bathrooms,” Zechs pointed out.

“I....Yeah, you're right. Still! I think this is bigger than we initially thoguth,” I said, as Jake arched a brow.

“Then what do you suggest?”

“I dunno. I guess revisit Princess Catalina. She's the reason we headed this way ourselves,” I muttered, as Errin nodded.

“I'm beginning to feel the same way as Dieter. I noticed in my time here I've begun to recall things I would never -could never- know. Yet, I do. What does this all mean? I searched for answers during my time with the Scholars of Wisdom, but alas, nothing has come up,” she sighed,” In any case, I need to get up early, so I'll be turning in soon. Good Night.”

With that, Errin waved, and began unrolling her bedroll, as Jake nodded,” She raises a good point. I'll see you all tomorrow.”

With that, Jake, Zechs and the others wandered off to their own corners of the small clearing, collapsing asleep in their bedrolls, as Potato and I sat alone around the embers of the fire.

“So...You gonna explain to me why Jake things you're a guy?” I asked finally.

Potato looked up, removing her large top hat,“You're a guy. You wouldn't understand.”

“Oh? Go ahead, try me.”

Potato coughed, her voice becoming a fluty tone,”When I met Jake, he was a weakling who had no sense of the game or its mechanics. In spite of this, he tried his very best and never gave up, even when death looked him square in the eye. Because of this, He....He...I wanted to help him. I made a new character and everything, and even crafted this new persona as 'One of the guys' to help him, all because I loved seeing him sparkle so, growing and learning. All this for m, this is nothing. I love numbers and I love games. I'm a programmer in real life. I make websites and the like. Figuring out the underlying logic of Slidelands was simple. However, Jake didn't see it like that. He saw it as a world, and that's why I want to help him...”

“Because you want it to actually be a real world, don't you?”

Potato covered her face as her cheeks grew a deep crimson,” Y-yes, but there's other reasons.”

“O-oh. Oh God,” I snickered,” You-you actually like him, don't you?”

“See!” she squeaked, covering her face,” You don't understand! I told you!”

“Now, now,” I patted her on the back,” It's cool. I getcha.”

“Why are you so buddy-buddy with me, anyways, then? You trying to seduce him, too?” she whispered.

I snorted,” No. Absolutely not. Jake is a friend, and that's where that ends. However, you seem nice enough, and hey, it's cool you opened up to me like you did. If you need a wingma—erm, wingwoman, then I'll help you out!”

Potato wiped her eyes,”Thank you. I appreciate that. I guess I ought to have known a DPS like you would get it.”

“I—Huh?” I asked, as Potato giggled, waving as she too wandered off to bed. I sighed, tossing out my bedroll, as both Jun and Dennis sidled beside me. I fell asleep sandwiched between two squirming Floofs as I swiftly fell asleep.

I spent the next few days learning the ways of the Wardens of Nature, meditating in the woods, picking berries and listening to Gribbs' rambling diatribes about the aspects of Nature and the underlying sense of it all. No new epiphanies came to me during this time, but after performing a an afternoon of yoga, Gribbs approached me.

“You've done well, but now is the time for you to prove yourself. You must face the guardian of the forest, Humbaba.”

“He doesn't sound so tough. I'll take care of this,” I smirked, as Dennis trotted beside me.

“I'm not so sure, Deegal! Humbaba is a Divine Beast, tasked by Aleph Lamed to terrorize Humanity since antiquity! He won't be so easily cowed!” she pleaded.

“What do you suggest, then?” I arched my brow. What strange advice would she offer me? She rummaged in her cloak before producing a small pouch, offering it to me,” This is a small charm I made. It will boost your Luck.”

I took the amulet, not wishing to tell her my Luck was among my higher attributes,” Thank you. I'll wear it for you.”

I tied the amulet to my waist straps and trotted along behind Gribbs as Dennis waved me off We traveled together for an indeterminate time, as the Sun hid behind the boughs above us, with just flecks of light falling through the rare spaces in that dense armor from the sky. We walked along, till reaching a clearing, where Gribbs stepped aside. I blinked in the bright light, as I stepped back in fright. Before me sat a gigantic man-thing. He possessed the body and limbs of a human, but he was easily as tall as a two story house, and his head was that of a glowering lion, mane and all. Immediately spotting me as I jumped back, his attention turned to the pair of us as he shifted to face us.

“Gribbs, who is this you bring to me? Another play-thing to torture?”

“Master Humbaba, this is the latest supplicant to our order. I merely ask that you test her, to see if she is worthy of our order's inner secrets,” Gribbs asked, as Humbaba laughed. Standing, he loomed over even the treeline, as he looked down as me, his breath now hot and smoky.

“Small child, you stand before me a supplicant, then? Yet you also are a demigod, one of Hu Shian's despicable children. I will enjoy this,” he sneered, as he roared, a flash of flame and roaring steam spewing towards me. Leaping out of the way, I danced from Tree to tree as his offensive continued, sweeping his arm along, smashing over the trees. I hopped above his trundling barricade of flesh, running along its length until delivering a hearty Vacuum Fist to his cheek.

“GOTCHA!” I cheered, as Humbaba groaned in pain, before snatching me out of the air. Squeezing me in one hand, he gloated with a rumbling chuckle as his grip about me tightened.

“Little demigod, even with the divinity your bloodline gives you, you are nothing compared to me! I was granted seven terrors to array myself against you and all the other humans! Just skitter off to the rest of your disgusting race!”

“N-no,” I wheezed, as I felt my muscles and bones squeezed, bones cracking, muscles screaming out in pain. In this moment, my mind blanked, and I Bit his finger harshly. He howled in pain, loosening his grip as I let the flaring call of World Ogre's Mask overtake me.

“I dunno where you get off just mocking me like that, but I won't stand it,” I hissed, as I felt the pain of Alluring Tail Whirlwind. I stepped towards the giant with but one thought running through my mind; to destroy this monster utterly. He paused, stepping back himself as he flexed his fingers towards me.

“An impressive display, but your disgusting magic means nothing to me! Die in your own mind,” he cried, as a flash of flame covered me. Ignoring this torrent of heat, my temper flared. Lunging forward with several of my tails, I felt my power surge ever higher as “World Ogre Cleaver” flashed on my action menu. Whatever magic he employed cracked before him as spectral blades materialized about my tails, as he stepped back once more.

“What. Is. THIS? Destruction of Magic? Only a god could achieve such a feat! I-Lady Ayin,” he gasped, as I screwed up my face, my tails firing forward, slashing him with cruel slashes. He collapsed to his knees before me.

“Lady Ayin, I apologize. I didn't realize you were reborn. Please forgive this impudent slave,” he grovelled. I blinked, and my Rage dissipated like the fog on a sunny day. I scanned my menu and found my health barely at half.

“But World Ogre Mask only triggers if I'm at critical levels? What happened?” I thought, before realizing Humbaba still lay prostrate before me,” Ah, well, you are forgiven. Now, do I pass your test?”

“Huh? Oh, yes. You pass, of course,” Humbaba rose,” Gribbs give this one the lessons. I must return to the Cedar Forests. If Lady Ayin has returned, then her temple must be rebuilt.”

“Oh. Very well, then,” I called, turning to Gribbs as he looked at me with both awe and surprise.

“Very well, then, come along,” he motioned, as I trotted along behind him.

“Do you know why we gave you the Nature Seals when you first joined us?” he asked.

“No, what was that all about?”

“We bury our initiates in mud as their first task as symbolic of how, much a like a seed, they are beginning their journeys towards understanding. Then, we expose you all to the flames and danger of Humbaba in order to force you to grow. All those who cannot make it, well...” Gribbs looks away..

“You had them killed?”

Gribbs sighed,” Nature can be cruel, but fair. We like to think we're adopting her methods. With that, though.” He whispered a series of hushed syllables, and the tattoos along my body vanished.

“You don't mean,” I cried.

“Yes, you are free to wear clothes again, as a full Warden of Nature,” Gribbs declared, nodding, as I cheered. Donning my old gi, I spun about triumphantly, rushing towards the exit as Dennis perked up at my arrival.

“Oh! You made it! I mean, I knew you would, but....Well,” She mumbled, as I laughed.

“It wasn't anything,” I guffawed, putting Humbaba's strange surrender out of mind,” Now, c'mon, let's get the others.”

As we returned to the forum, we found ourselves alone, save for other Player Characters milling about. Meditating as a way to pass the time and raise my Holiness Skill, which raises my Spirit, I soon fell asleep, as a presence loomed over me, before I blinked awake, finding Jake and Zechs standing over me.

“I didn't figure you'd be goofing off so early in the day,”Jake mused, as I leaped to my feet.

“I was training! Meditating to raise my Spirit!” I countered.

“Yeah, sure. You drooling on yourself while meditating is a thing, too, right?” Zechs observed, as I shot him a glare.

“What do you guys want, anyways?” I asked, wiping my mouth.

“We just got Zechs initiated into the Soldiers of Virtue. If you want to continue elsewhere, then we can,” Jake explained.

“I was initiated early this morning. It's just the Grandmaster who had to go on and on with the prayers, benedictions, and rites for hours and hours on end aft—OWOWOWOW! WHAT WAS THAT FOR?” Zechs complained, as Jake slapped him upside the head with an armored hand.

“Those 'prayers and benedictions' were to extol you to further glory! Something you should've took to heart,” Jake growled. Before Zechs could reply, Jun bounded over him, crashing him to the floor as he rushed to my side, proudly presenting me with a diploma.

“Look! Look! I'm official now! I'm a smart!” he beamed, as I looked over the paper.

“This certifies Jun as a proper and rightful Scholar of Wisdom, fully certified to explore and plum the depths of all mysteries of this world and others. Wow, congratulations,” I patted him on the head, as Errin chuckled, walking up beside us.

“Indeed, despite his lack of schooling, his sense of logic and deductive reasoning are exemplary. Now, we're both licensed as Scholars What do we do now?” Errin asked.

“We need to get back to Grafzou. I need to talk to Princess Catalina and see for myself if my theory is correct,” I said.

“Oh?” Jake asked.

“Yes. I need to find out for myself if this really is a game or not,” I said.

Jake snorted,” There's no need. This is obviously a game.”

“But if you want to get from here back to Grafzou, then I recommend going along the Air Line bridge,” Potato interrupted, hopping down from a nearby tree,” It won't remove the need to travel along the Veeya Stream entirely, but it will cut off a good portion of the way, making it quicker. There's something else I remember is important, but....I can't recall what, though.”

“Well, then that settles it. Let's take this Air Line Bridge,” I declared as the others followed along,” One thing, though, where is it?”

Potato coughed politely, and took the lead, leading us off from the courtyard through a path to the east, crossing over a forested trail that weaved its way through the rocks and crags of the uneven terrain, painted with the falling leaves of the nearby trees. We traveled silently in this way for some times, as we came along a long narrow bridge made of woven metallic ropes seemingly pulled straight up from the ground itself. Walking along the platform of the bridge hesitantly as it vaulted at a steep grade up, I found, despite its narrow construction, it was of solid construction, and I soon forgot my dears, enjoying the view, all until the clouds about us parted and I spotted a lone figure before us.

“Oh. Now, I remember, “ Potato breathed.

“What? What is it?” I demanded.

Potato raised her trumpet,” This is the thing I was worried about.”

“What?”

“Ricky Raccoon,” she hissed.

“WHAT?” I demanded flatly as the figure approaching us came into focus. A roughly humanoid figure trotted forward, dressed in leather pantaloons and flamboyant red vests, covered in dark grey fur with a raccoon head, about as tall as Jun.

“Oh! Oh! OOOH! A bevy of beauties approaches me on my bridge! Well, I must've been a good boy in my last life! Oh, wait, I wasn't!” he cackled, as Jake sighed.

“What's your deal, little man?”

“I'm Ricky Raccoon, a Divine Beast formed by dear Lady Bet Mem! This bridge is my charge and I must charge those how travel along it! Now, if you want to, then I'll take one of your ladies, if you please,” he grinned maniacally, as I snorted.

“No chance,” I growled, as I rushed forward. As I shot ahead, I swung at his face. However, as my fist brushed his fur, he melted out of my sight, as I felt someone patting my backside.

“Mm, excellent, excellent. I prefer Loppo girls, but no one can deny the classics,” he chortled, as I spun about, slapping his hand as he wove out of sight again, dancing on the railing.

“NO ONE CAN HIT ME! NO ONE CAN HIT ME! NO ONE! WHOA-” he mocked, as Jake swung his hammer wildly at the weaving trickster,” You almost had me!”

“You slippery eel!” Jake roared, prompting only further laughter from Ricky Raccoon.

“Jake, keep calm! He's using an auto-evade skill, we can't just charge in blindly,” Potato called, as Jake fumed so badly, steam rose from his breathing slits.

“ABSOLUTE BATTLEFIELD MURDEROUS INTENT!” He roared, as a wash of killing intent flooded the air like a tsunami of solidified bad feeling, sending shivers down my spin, as Ricky Raccoon Leaped into the air.

“YOU! You did it! You did it! But, you have to know!, YOU CAAAAAAAN'T STOP THE RICKY!” He sang in a calliopean tenor. I grabbed my ears instinctively as the blast of the singing sent me flying backwards off the bridge. Hanging on the railing desperately, his pitch rose to an atonal wail, as I winced, grabbing my ears without thinking, and realized my mistake as I fell. Whistling through the air, I blacked out, presumably falling to my doom.

I awoke with Jun and Dennis hovering over me, as the pair sighed.

“Did we lose?” I croaked, as Dennis nodded slowly.

“We all got tossed off the bridge by that monster's bad singing,” she sighed, as I rose. I found we were in a simply furnished inn room, as Jun and Dennis rushed to my side.

“We're in the village of Feite right now, a small hamlet parallel to the Air Line. According to the locals we can get back on the Air Line if we cross northwest, but...As we are, there's no much we can do,” Dennis sighed.

“Oh?”

“Yes. I have no way to attack an auto-evading foe, and it seems like you don't, either,” Dennis frowned, as I nodded. I had no clue that such a benefit was even possible.

“Can you do anything about it, Jun?” I asked, as he shook his head.

“Rancher is a utility class. I can buff you all, but attacking isn't much I can do. Especially with that much Air energy around. Most of my attack Skills are Earth-based,” he said,” Sorry.”

“Potato, Jake, Errin and Zechs, seem to have a plan, though,” Dennis offered, as we found our fiends around a table on the first level, with Zechs lifting a bizarre sword. Its hilt was nothing special, but its blade was that of a meter stick.

“Now, Zechs, be careful, this weapon is incredibly dangerous,” Jake warned,” It will apply Sure Hit to all your skills, so if you use Area of Effect attacks, you WILL hit everyone within the area.”

“No need to worry, all my best skills are single target. Now, time to test this guy out! What is this sword's name, anyways?” Zechs asked, testing its balance.

“The Absolute Metric--”

“No matter. I'll call it the Frank Glabzarios,” Zechs interrupted, as Jake pursed his lips.

“Why did you ask if you were just gonna ignore me?” Jake demanded, as Zechs raised his sword, as the jar of cookies on the far shelf shot into his hands.

“OH BOY!” Zechs grinned, as he turned to me,” Oh, Dieter!”

“Hi--” I managed, as Zechs appeared before me, massaging my chest roughly, before warping back to his seat,” W-WHAT WAS THAT?”

“Nice, really nice,” Zechs grinned, as Jun nearly fell over out of shock.

“WHAT THE HELL, ZECHS?” Jake roared, as Errin shook her head, chuckling.

“I'm not sure what you expected, Jake,” Potato offered, sipping her tea.

“ZECHS, H-HE JUST MOVED THE WAY RICKY DID,” I squeaked, as Potato shook her head.

“Zechs didn't move. You did. This weapon, the Frank Glabzarios, applies Sure Hit, so if something is targeted, it will be hit by the user,” she explained.

“It's the Absolute Metric,” Jake sighed.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. I will be sure to use this weapon for great morality, just like the Grandmaster told me!” Zechs cried

“He said to use your power to protect others, not...grope people. Goddammit, Zechs,” Jake sighed, as Zechs teleported out of his seat and to the door.

“I'll be off training. See you all later!” Zechs called.

“We better follow him. Who knows what he's going to do with that much power,” Jake sighed, as Errin and Potato followed him out the door.

“Are you hurt? Do you need anything?” Dennis cooed, as I waved her off.

“I don't need anything. Just...I need warning from stupid stuff like that,” I sighed, as I followed the others outside.

The next few hours saw Zechs abusing space and time, as he warped about the small hamlet. Jun remained spooked as Zechs zipped about him. I secretly suspected he was doing it on purpose, but I didn't voice my opinions. Eventually, Zechs tired of his tomfoolery.

“Okay, okay, I think I got a hand for the Frank Glabzarios-”

“Absolute Metric,” Called Jake.

“Whatever. LET'S GO!” He cried, as we followed behind. Soon we fond ourselves back onto the Air Line, and before long, back against Ricky.

“You're back. Will you give me my toll?” he leered, as Zechs laughed.

“Hardly, you mutt! I'm gonna flay you alive so we don't have to listen to your singing! Seriously, it was like listening to a drowning cat on a blackboard!” he taunted, as Ricky paused. A bloody aura enveloped him, as Zechs reached for the Frank Glabzarios' hilt, as a cracking sound rang out and he winced.

“Zechs, what was that?” Jake asked.

“Promise to not get mad?” He asked.

“WHAT DID YOU DO?”

“THE FRANK GLABZARIOS BROKE, OKAY?” Zechs cried.

“YOU IDIOT! That was our one shot at beating this guy It took me three hours to make that sword!” Jake roared, wringing Zechs by the neck, as Ricky leaped forward, lunging and removing their heads with a clean sweep of his paw.

“YOU INSULTED MY SINGING! YOU'LL WATER MY BRIDGE WITH YOUR BLOOD!” He screamed, as I scampered backwards, falling over my feet as Errin, Dennis and Jun all fell prey to Ricky's attack, before he slowly turned to me.

“Now, where were we? Oh! Oh! Oh! What do you think of my sing--” he managed as a boom roared out across the bridge as he collapsed to the floor with a smoking hole through his torso.

Out of the fog a new figure stepped forward. Dressed in a red leather coat, fashionable red trousers, and high boots, with a broad stetson perched on her head. This Loppo lass looked over her handiwork with a satisfied smile.

“You can 'bang' that!” she chuckled in a cutesy voice, as she coughed roughly, blood dripping from her lips,” Oh, god. That was harder than I thought.” I stared, partially out of shock, but also at my savior's name.

FluffyStar

[Neutron Drifter]

Level 12,345.69

[longsleeveeveningdresses]

There were also no mirrors around ！@……~！￥……&Two-piece prom dresses

To start, do as all brides should do'have fun browsing Pinterest and Instagram (how Bryan found Paige!) to narrow down your most must-have wedding gown styles ball gowns wedding dress. From there, research your favorite recurring designers and whether they offer customizations. And, if you already have a vision in mind for a completely made-to-order garment fashion mother of the bride dresses, make sure that it aligns with your chosen designer's aesthetic. "I always try to make sure that the idea and the essence of the brand really resonates with our clients if they're going to do a custom look lalamira prom dresses," says Paige. She added that "that's the tricky thing with designing something custom is that if you're idea is way off base from what I would normally design, I would be very hesitant to work with that client because I would want them to work with a designer that really matches their concept and their vision."

I grew up in the '70s and '80s, but in a slightly different kind of environment ?C my father was the one who managed the household. He woke us up, brought us to school on his way to work, signed our spelling sheets and distributed the weekly allowance. He knew who to call when the toilet choked or when our living room tiles popped in the dead of the night. He bought breakfast on Sunday and took care of the finances. He made all our doctor appointments and it was him, not my mother, who held my hand as I cried while I got my wisdom teeth removed at 16. My mother loved us, but her inability to cook and her fear of blood just meant she showed her love in other ways. Only the bride can wear the traditional red qun kua, which consists of the 'qun' (skirt) and the 'kua' (jacket). Due to its origins in southern China, a common misconception is that only Cantonese brides can wear the ceremonial dress. Janet says: jsweddenladress20107 'This cannot be further away from the truth. All Chinese brides can wear the qun kua, as it is actually a Chinese practice.' Meanwhile, your groom has a few sartorial choices to match your qun kua. He can stick to his day suit, wear a Tang-style jacket with dragon motifs or Mandarin collar shirt, or even go all out and wear a ma gua (a silk Chinese men's jacket over a gown) with embroidery and fa kao (cloth flower ball).

Phillane: We did one in Bali and another in Singapore! We were in Bali for a work trip and decided to do a shoot of our own to celebrate our anniversary. The one in Bali, was an adventure in its own. We had no makeup artist, no hair stylist, so we did everything on our own, in the dark. Because the villa we were in blacked out the night before floral evening dress, it affected the lightings. There were also no mirrors around Two-piece prom dresses, so we used all the resources we had ?C compact powder mirrors, small foldable mirrors, phone cameras and so on just to have a glimpse of how we look like. It was really an experience! What suits your friends and family's needs may not suit yours, so save yourself the pain of any regret by doing your due diligence and look up reviews and portfolios of these recommended vendors before you engage them. Meet up with them to find out if you feel comfortable with them and make sure that their works are consistent with the ones that you've seen on their social media and website. Doing a thorough research of your vendors before you engage one will give you confidence in your decisions and make them easier to make, and knowing that you've made the right choice will also save you some wedding stress. You May Also Like: mother of the bride dresses and rose gold bridesmaid are ... But equally important as the dress or the shoe is the prom ... Where can I get an affordable designer little girl formal ... How do I find the cheapest prices plus size prom dresses 2019 lace mermaid wedding dress with sleeves&blush mermaid ...

[kytober]

I’d like to introduce everyone to Scabiosa, the Floravien Monk. Age 50, 4′11, 86lbs, Male, Lawful Neutral.

This piece took me ~6.5 hours and I’m really proud with how it turned out.

Floraviens are one of my 3.5 homebrew races. The design was inspired by starbound’s floran and the mechanics were based on Warforged and Adu’ja, but the lore is original.

If you would like to use this race for your games, let me know! You don’t need permission, but I’d love to hear how it goes. Please hold criticism of the race’s mechanics. I will soon be doing a playtest where I’ll get the feedback I’m looking for firsthand. Without further ado, here is the race’s entry.

---

Floraviens, or floras, are a race of mischievous humanoid plants that flamboyantly promote nature’s splendor.

Personality: Floraviens tend to be devious schemers and tricksters or wise sages. Young floras like to lay traps, pull pranks, and fluster other races as much as possible, but as they age these feelings subside. An old floravien still enjoys a good prank, but the acts are far more mild and lack the obnoxiousness of younger floras.

Physical Description: Floras look like toned humanoids with smooth, cool green skin sparsely covered in small, colorful flowers and leaves. Their heads bear one or two large, prominent flowers, and their eyes appear as large dark beads of black, green, blue, or some other color. Their noses are simply two slits on the front of their smooth face. Their mouths have no lips, instead opening to reveal stout, pointed thorns instead of teeth. They usually wear loose, revealing clothing to expose as much of their body to the sun as possible.

Relations: Floraviens individually get along well with anyone who enjoys excitement and a good joke. As a culture, floras only get along with individuals who revere and appreciate nature.

Alignment: Floras tend towards the chaotic alignment, with a decent split between good, neutral, and evil. Good floraviens focus on the sacrificial healing they can perform with their flowers, while evil floraviens focus on the poison they produce.

Floravien Lands: Floraviens live in forests along with fey and other plant creatures. They form small communities, often no bigger than five families, and defend themselves by creating cunning traps that utilize the dangerous plants of their homeland.

Religion: Floraviens worship the gods of nature and plant life.

Language: Floras tend to speak with an underlying deviousness, often giving the impression that they’re plotting something involving the person they’re speaking with.

Names: Floraviens tend to name their children after a flower that shares a color with their first bloom.

Adventurers: Flora adventurers tend to be druids and rangers in order to boost their natural prowess, though floravien rogues also crop up fairly often. Floraviens adventure to explore the world around them, to gain attention and status, to promote the sanctity of nature over urban expansion, or to merely get their kicks.

FLORAVIEN RACIAL TRAITS

·         -2 Strength, +2 Wisdom

·         Size: Medium.

·         Plant (Humanoid-Plant): Floraviens are plants with the humanoid-plant subtype.

·         Humanoid-Plant Traits: Floraviens have the humanoid-plant subtype, granting them capabilities unknown to other plants while weakening their connection to their ancestors. Unlike other plants, a humanoid-plant has an Intelligence score. Unlike other plants, a humanoid-plant is not immune to mind-affecting effects. Unlike other plants, a humanoid-plant is subject to critical hits and flanking. Immunity to poison, sleep effects, paralysis, polymorph, and stunning. Does not need to sleep, but does need to eat and breathe. Does not need to sleep, but must rest 8 hours before preparing spells.

·         Floravien base land speed is 30 feet.

·         Low-Light Vision: A floravien can see twice as far as a human in starlight, moonlight, torchlight, and similar conditions of shadowy illumination. They retain the ability to distinguish color and detail under these conditions.

·         Photosynthesis (Ex): If a floravien has access to 4 hours of direct sunlight and at least 1 pint of water each day, they do not need to eat.

·         Natural Weapons: 2 vines (1d3+1/2 strength mod plus poison) 10ft reach. See below.

·         Vines (Ex): Floraviens have two long vines that sprout from their shoulders. These appendages are fully prehensile and are a floravien's primary natural weapons. The vines are thin, ending in sharp points. The vines are covered in thorns that secrete a weak poison. If a vine is cut off, it regrows in 1 month. These vines allow the floravien to more easily climb surfaces, and if both vines are wrapped around a sturdy object, a floravien can use them to hang, freeing their arms. Each vine has a reach of 10ft and deals 1d3 slashing/piercing damage plus half the floravien's strength modifier on a successful hit. Each successful hit also has a chance to poison the target. These vines can be used to hold objects, but they cannot be used to wield a weapon or shield or activate magic items.

·         Bloom (Ex)/(Su): Each year on their birthday, a floravien's flowers bloom into a different color, which it remains as for the rest of the year. Each floravien can grow a number of special flowers equal to half their HD (minimum 1). If the floravien removes one of these flowers as a standard action, it deals damage to the floravien equal to their HD, but any creature who eats the flower (also a standard action) heals for the same amount. It takes 1d4 days to regrow a flower, and a plucked flower rots after 1 week.

o    Roll a d8 to determine the color of the bloom.

§   1 - Red

§   2 - Green

§   3 - Yellow

§   4 - Blue

§   5 - Purple

§   6 - Pink

§   7 - Black

§   8 - White

·         Poison (Ex): A floravien produces a weak poison depending on the color of its bloom.

o    The DC of this poison is 10 + half the floravien's HD + the floravien's Constitution modifier and deals the same initial and secondary damage (except white).

§   Red - 1 Str

§   Green - 1 Dex

§   Yellow - 1d6 HP

§   Blue - 1 Int

§   Purple - 1 Wis

§   Pink - 1 Cha

§   Black - 1 Con

§   White - Sickened for 1d3 rounds / Nauseated for 1 minute.

·         Speak with Plants (Sp): A floravien can use Speak with Plants once per day as a spell like ability with a caster level equal to their HD.

·         Vulnerability to Fire: A floravien takes +50% damage from fire, regardless of whether a saving throw is allowed, or if the save is a success or failure.

·         +2 Racial bonus on Climb and Survival checks.

·         Automatic Language: Common and Sylvan. Bonus Languages: Any

·         Favored Class: Druid.

Level Adjustment +1

-Age- Adult: 20 Middle Age: 125 Old: 200 Venerable: 300 Max Age: +2d% years

-Height/Weight- Male: 4'5 +2d6 80lbs (x1d6) Female: 4'5 +2d6 80lbs (x1d6)

-Starting Age- Barbarian/Rogue/Sorcerer: 4d4 Bard/Fighter/Ranger/Paladin: 6d4 Cleric/Druid/Monk/Wizard: 10d4

[xenodross]

The 19th Day - After Lunch

A moment of respite after our frenetic encounter with the repugnant rats beneath the Traveler’s repose.

I’m jotting these words as some bandages are administered to Master Bellamy and Mistress Tambledorne. I must record my findings while they are still fresh!

An unexpected use for the Energy Extraction cantrip -- if I refocus the timbre of the resonance it can be used for recuperative effects as I theorized! Mr. Bellamy seems to be suffering from no unexpected or deleterious effects and his wounds reacted similarly to my application of energy as they would to other ‘divine’ spells I’ve observed. The fools, they thought I had gone too far - but I have only tiptoed beyond a glorious threshold - who knows what discoveries wait beyond?

A debate is being held about our next steps. The infestation of rats in the inn’s fetid basement seems to have sprung from an tunnel leading beyond the environs. There is some interest in plunging further in - but also a certain vague sense of duty to report our success to our temporary employer and his brutish wife above. I will remain removed from the dialogue for now until such time as my knowledge can lend best aid.

I am still astonished at this new application of my theorem that I have discovered. Years at the Veneficium, and now only a few hours as a member of this adventurer’s consortium and I have stumbled upon this breakthrough. I see now the wisdom that can be found in the necessities of the field, that would never be revealed in the dusty halls of my beloved libraries. Could further exploits lead to even grander discoveries? This is something I must consider carefully.

An adventurer’s consortium! How strange and droll to write these words! And what an odd consortium it is...

We met by chance in the town square, our various needs leading us all at once to the town Notice Board, where opportunities to seek and offer employment are hung. Master Binderwall was perhaps glib to pronounce it ‘Destiny’ - but perhaps not. For each of us, travelers in this town to arrive at the same point in space, at the same moment in time - all seeking the same sort of aid does suggest some sort of cosmic synchronicity that may govern or nudge the events of this plane. I would not lay it at the feet of a so-called deity for obvious reasons, but still -- curious.

The five of us, meeting in the square of Greenest - all in need of strength and skill beyond our own.

At my suggestions we retired to the common room of the Green Rest (weary sigh) and I spent some of my fading resources on tea and biscuits for the table. I must be honest - it was not destiny or fate that moved me at this time, but the prosaic need for coin. Master Binderwall carries a right heavy purse and it was to him I was most oriented.

A strange gnome, I’d hazard a guess even among his kind. He speaks in strange half-sentences and grand pronouncements. (Or perhaps he is unfamiliar with Common, I have just realized! I must make time to speak with him and help expand his vocabulary and usage.) He spoke of some grand task, but gave little detail other than he was eager to aid the rest of us with our own projects. After some probing, he did allude to some sort of employer or organization beyond him providing resources - this will bear careful attention.

Pledged to the gnome’s service - at least for the moment, Master Bellamy. A large man with a sword. I do not like him.

The strangest one at our table without a doubt was Mistress Mouse. (no family name! Uncertain whether she is concealing it or perhaps never had one!) An orc-touched wearing armor of ancient design. She comes from the Wood of Sharp Teeth to the north, but I am completely puzzled as to how she learned her martial skill or really what antecedent events could have produced such a strange figure. It is though she wandered in from another world entirely. Vicious and effective with her axes though, as the now deceased rats that surround me can attest.

Mistress Tambledorne is a bard, with a quick wit and a knack for gathering intelligence from unlikely sources. She displayed some surprisingly efficient magical effects during our battle, perhaps I must revise my alma mater’s commonly held opinion about these spellworkers. (But why the singing - what does the ukelele have to do with it? So...redundant.)

Not the most impressive group, to be certain - but I can intuit no ill intent from any of them. Except perhaps that tea-kettle Bellamy. I drew up a simple Vagabond Contract on a free page in this journal and we all signed in good faith. I worry that perhaps I was too fervent in the clarity I expressed about my availability and interest in the consortium -- in that it is extremely limited. Tomorrow we will follow the trade road to the west, from whence my delivery was supposed to arrive and hopefully retrieve it and learn the fate of Camden and the other merchants.

But today it was decided that we should seek more information about the bard, Loesin - the quarry of the majority of our group. For some reason that was never fully explained to me, taking this small odd-job of clearing the rats in the basement of this inn would help us with that task? It was unclear, but without a better suggestion I found myself stepping down into the acrid, fecal matter festooned basement of this place. Only my delight at arcane research has been able to help me keep my stomach settled.

Ah - I see Master Binderwall beckoning me over. My knowledge and wisdom is required, as I expected.

More later - Scholar of Tomorrow!

[insidethemarble]

The Porcelain Throne of Judgment

“Oh. I’ll clean it up!” he said.  Words, and subsequent actions, which have become one of the clearest demonstrations of grace that I’ve ever witnessed.  ~~~~~ One day last year, I stood with all of my roommates in the hallway, preparing to embark on a group adventure. I live with 4 other guys in the upper level of a church. The sanctuary is right below our apartments. It’s pretty trendy.  I went into the bathroom to brush my teeth. Upon walking in, it was hard to miss the puddle of “golden glory” sitting smugly on the toilet seat. Lovely.  I was annoyed. All of my roommates are grown adults! Is it really so difficult to pee into the toilet, not on it? Come on guys! 

With angry hands on my hips, I walked back to the laughing cluster and said, “Who left pee on the toilet seat?” Any moment now, I expected someone to fess up and offer to go wipe it off. How “just” of me, right? Teaching someone responsibility and general hygiene. I was making the world a better place by enforcing the standards of basic humanity and “trusting” my roommates to take ownership; to be the dignified men God has called them to be. I represented God’s own “White Throne of Judgment” [Rev 20]. Thank goodness I lived here so that righteousness could be established in the house of the Lord!  (Oh brother...) What I expected is not what I got. My friend, Anthony, happened to be with us that day. He’s officially been a pastor for only a few years, but his wisdom and character reflect a much deeper walk with Christ than I usually get to see in most folks. On this day, while I sat on my critical seat of judgment demanding justice and accountability, Anthony surprised me with his quick and kind response: “Oh. I’ll clean it up!” Crazy, right!? He didn’t make the mess. In fact, we never found out who was responsible. But he took ownership, bringing the solution by doing what only potty-training dads do. He cleaned up somebody’s pee! (....gross)

“What!? No!” I thought. “How are we going to punish someone if you clean it up for them?  But Anthony didn’t think like that, because he knew who sat on the throne of his life. He demonstrated a kingdom principle that day which has stuck with me ever since. It’s all over the bible, but sometimes you have to see it in action before it sinks (or in this case, flushes). He demonstrated grace. With a servant’s heart, he covered someone else’s mistake by cleaning up their mess, without the need for punishment or retribution. Nobody got in trouble. Nobody was publicly shamed. The issue was solved, and we went on our merry way without further incident. I didn’t say anything at the time but I was deeply impacted by that moment. That kind of attitude only comes from one person. The apostle John says, “Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into his hands...rose from supper...Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet and to wipe them with the towel that was wrapped around his waist.” Later on, Jesus explains what he’s doing. “If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. For I have given you an example...” [John 13:1-15]

Jesus solved problems that weren’t his and he freed people with forgiveness. He did, and still does, prefer mercy over immediate punishment. And he prioritizes relationship, removing walls that divide us with the goal of peace and reconciliation. He’s not out to punish us; he wants us to experience his love. So instead of coming at us with retribution, or keeping a grudge-list, He nailed our offenses to the cross and cleaned up the mess we made. Through his forgiveness, I’m free to relax and trust that he likes me, wants me around, and that I won’t end up in the doghouse for my numerous, numerous mistakes. Thank goodness. He expects us to do the same. Since He forgave me of my sins (aka, criticism, judgment, and mis-applied justice mentalities) how much more can I forgive my brother who pees on the seat? (Jesus died for that too, by the way). I want my first instincts to be to forgive and resolve. Forgive wrongdoers their wrongs and resolve problems without making a scene.  I want to be someone who brings freedom and grace rather than justice and law. That’s what Jesus did, and we love him for it. [John 1:16-17] It was easy that day to see who sat on the “throne” of Anthony’s attitude. Whether it’s before the white throne of judgment, or the porcelain throne of grace, I want my character to represent Christ’s.  So next time, I’ll just clean it up. 

[satyrsandburritos]

Campaign Diary 1: Session 2

November 2016

The party awoke and set out on their first adventure, a small task. Thanks to the discovery of a reward poster by our vulpin cleric and kri fighter duo, the party found work. A local glassworker named Behruz, a camel centaur wizard, had recently been the victim of a theft. A very valuable, new glass dagger had been stolen from his shop, and he was offering 100 gold pieces plus some in-store credit to everyone who could help him retrieve it.

So the party of foreigners, led by Behruz, set out into the desert, following a lead they’d been given by some kids in town. Before they set out, some party members attempted to enter the desert without Behruz, and found that they couldn’t enter it. Behruz explained that only those in the company of natives could enter and survive the dune sea. It had always been this way.

So with Behruz leading the way, the party made the trudging journey into the desert, narrowly avoiding a potentially dangerous encounter with some sand cats, ferocious and nimble large felines with saber teeth, thanks to our kender sorcerer’s use of her screeching hoopak.

The heat was blistering, and our half-elf ranger and human fighter became exhausted, but just in time, for ahead of them was an open passageway leading down beneath a dune, marked by a single red banner.

Forgetting to stealth, our two exhausted players made a beeline for the stairs seeking shade, but only alerted a bandit on guard of their presence. The party hurried in and silenced the guard easily enough. Down the stairs and into the dune was a large open room with columns and faded fresco on the walls.

The one visible fresco depicted a large, black and long-necked feline creature roaring, with a caption below in Sekhi, which only our Wizard speaks. The party takes a short rest; our Wizard translates the caption and the others explore and adjoining room.

In the adjoining room is nothing but some broken potter and a tub of some sorts, covered in a dusty wooden slat. The party removes the cover and discovers that the tub is actually a well of sorts, about 6 feet deep. Our kender sorcerer, seeing that the liquid is clear and doesn’t smell, decides to taste it to see if it is indeed water. She makes a wisdom saving throw, and tells the party that the water is just water.

Our human fighter is unsatisfied with that answer, and tosses a coin in to test it further. When nothing happens, he hops in to retrieve his coin. He rolls a wisdom saving throw and fails it. Due to being submerged in the water, he is now considered charmed, in a way, and finds himself suddenly smitten with our kender sorcerer. Upon meeting back up with our wizard in the main chamber, he reveals that this is, of course, an old abandoned temple to a mostly-forgotten goddess of worldly pleasures and sexual acts called Garameda, explaining the well’s affects.

There is still one room to investigate, and the party assumes that’s where the rest of the bandits are. Our kri fighter leading the way, the party rushes in ready for combat. Behruz and our human fighter delivered the final blows to all four of the bandits, and the glass dagger was found. Around the room, which was a ritual room at one point, the party looted and found upwards of 500gp, as well as some gems and crystals.

Pleased with the outcome of this venture, the party heads back to Katua for dinner and rest. The party, save for our native wizard, heads back to the tavern. Behruz returns to his shop, where he finds that his romantic interest, a young and pretty fellow camel centaur has installed an actual, wooden lockable door onto his shop to replace the curtain door.

The party plans to take Behruz up on his reward of in-store credit the following morning.