#german pokémon names are a treat but these too

[ganondoodle]

hm ....

[inprogresspokemon]

Could you imagine your half-evolved Pokémon having German names and French names? Maybe Japanese n' Korean too. But I suppose that both French and German follow a name-pattern upon their evolution lines, so I suppose it wouldn't be too hard to name them in other languages so long as some of your followers are fluent in either aforementioned languages. Also, I wonder why TPC doesn't give Pokémon unique names in Spanish, Italian and other European Languages, but from there, it ain't on you at all.

That would be cool! I sadly lack the language capabilities to do that and for the purposes of this blog I think English names suffice, but it would be very neat to think what they would be. Due to how Pokemon has treated naming in other languages, I imagine the inspirations and references would be (while still related of course) fairly different for all the names.

No idea on why some languages have unique names while others simply carry over the English names!

[totentcnz]

Wilhelm has some of Richard Wagner’s original Pokémon. Not all of them--his team is mostly new and let’s be real a lot of Wagner’s ‘mon would have some real nasty attachments to their old master and his family--but he does currently have a few.

The first is Fáfnir, his ace (and the Pokémon who will later become his dragon sibling--the dragon that he as a Draconid will Bond Phenomenon with). Fáfnir is a Hydreigon who used to perform in Wagner’s original operas, being most famous for playing the dragon of a near-identical name in the opera Siegfried. However. I should say that Richard Wagner’s love of Pokémon extended only to those who were nonsapient. If a Pokémon was sapient, he’d treat them just like every other human he came into contact with, aka garbage. Fáfnir stuck with the dude because his operatic performances were second to none. But the moment Wagner was cursed to lose his talent after his death, Fáfnir ditched him and his family completely and decided to offer himself to whoever it was that would receive Wagner’s talent.

I should make another note here. Fáfnir is Poison/Dragon, being a variant of the Hydreigon that’s closer to the original hydra (which was deadly poisonous), and he doesn’t have three heads--he has nine. He’s been around for a very long time, long enough that his heads would have been cut off and regrown until he reached the maximum. It’s unusual for such a powerful Pokémon to ally with a boy so young, but as far as the dragon is concerned, anyone who can reach his former master’s level of talent while simultaneously not being the horrific human being he was is worthy of his services.

Wilhelm’s second group of Wagner’s Pokémon includes Brünhilde, his Altaria companion--a German variant that’s Dragon/Fairy before Mega Evolution. Wagner had a ton of Altarias by his side (and quite creepily referred to them as his “collection” even though they were sapient); he’d gathered the best of the best of the best to be able to sing in his operas, and basically hoarded them & their families not letting anyone else “have” them for their productions. Though the Shiny Altarias are still with the Wagner family in Bayreuth, Brünhilde was one of the many who “defected,” so to speak, to Wilhelm once he came around and proved that he had their old master’s capabilities. And for good reason, too. They hang around Franzi’s house with him a lot and he treats them a lot better than Bitchard Wanger ever did.

[eldunea]

god ok i haven’t even started anakin’s blog yet but i already have his entire pokéverse thought out here i go

ORIGINS.

anakin was born in my fakémon region of preuzien to an enslaved old prussian (prūsai) family. in real life the old prussians were exterminated but in the pokémon world they were made the slaves of the junker ruling class. when the allies came into germany after wwii they tried to put a stop to this but unfortunately were not entirely successful.

as in canon, he has no biological human father, he’s like……the universe’s kid or something, it’s where he gets his insane powers from. in this verse he is also definitely a chosen one, but don’t take that to mean he isn’t a douche because he still totally is

like in canon he was a racer, but he didn’t race pods he raced dragons. his master knew he could make big bucks off him from an early age due to his abilities so according to prussian custom he was put on a dragon before he could learn to walk and learned how to ride that way. 

he speaks three languages: german, prūsiskai (the old prussian language) and english. his inability to speak japanese has been a weakness of his that he wants to improve on, and so he is studying that as well.

his first pokémon was a racing noivern that he named majjis, which is old prussian for “corn.” she loves her name and he didn’t even change it after he went vader, it was real fucking obvious which one of “team sith” would go back to the light side when all the other admins named their pokémon stuff like “void devourer” and “bone crusher” and here was darth vader with his ace named fucking. corn. he is currently 36 and starting from like age 10 he never lost a single race while riding corn until he was finally defeated by his son luke.

also like in canon, he won his freedom in a race but was unable to free his mother. much like lotor at the age of 12, anakin had the sense to get the fuck out of preuzien, but unlike lotor, nothing pressing dragged him back. he went to make a name for himself as a trainer and racer around the world, and also became the world’s strongest psychic.

he did go back to prussia briefly to rescue his mom. by that point shmi had been brutally beaten for refusing to give sexual favors to her master, and died in anakin’s arms. enraged, he slaughtered the entire family that had enslaved him.

DESCENT AND REDEMPTION.

as in canon, he was tormented by prophetic dreams of his lover padmé amidala dying and was corrupted by sheev palpatine to join the sith order (colloquially referred to as “team sith”), a criminal organization in orre that stole some of team snagem’s shadow-turning techniques and aimed to do it on a grander scale. palpatine’s goal was to build something known as the shadow star, a weapon so powerful that when aimed at a planet, it could turn all beings shadow, even arceus. the sith order would then use shadow control techniques to rule the world. but one thing that palpatine was also obsessed with was the search for immortality, which is how he baited anakin into joining him--by promising he could save the one he loved.

when anakin became darth vader, he allowed palpatine to turn him into a SHADOW HUMAN, just like all the other team sith admins. this means that much like a shadow pokémon, the door to his heart was sealed and much of his original personality was subsumed into just. this roiling inner turmoil of anger and violence. formally, nobody knew that star trainer and dragon racer anakin skywalker was actually underground crime lord darth vader, but they could all tell that something was really, really wrong because he started becoming colder and more withdrawn to his fans that he had formerly loved. 

nobody guessed that he had become a shadow, however, because they all attributed his change in personality to the cybernetic enhancements he had been given. by this point he had lost half his head and three of his limbs in battle, and so they were replaced with prosthetics and his artificial brain was enhanced with programming for metagross supercomputers. metagross are known for being assholes who think more like machines than living beings, so it was easy for his adoring fans to believe that anakin’s change of personality was no fault of his own.

he was purified by his children, luke and leia. they were battling rivals who later discovered that they were twins and figured out who their father was. meeting them, he felt human again for the first time when he was around them…then they told him they wanted to defeat the evil darth vader and darth sidious and restore balance to orre, and he was just. well this is awkward.

his first instinct was to just kill his children but something held him back. so instead of killing them, he accompanied them on pointless missions that would ultimately lead them nowhere near close to defeating him and sidious--just to keep them distracted. little did he know, the more he fought alongside them and spent time with them, the more his heart gauge was emptied and the closer he became to purification.

much like a shadow pokémon, the more he was purified, the more his body and brain resisted it. finally the temptation to stay shadow became too strong, at which point he told his kids he was vader, locked them up, and turned them over to sidious to dispose of them. they managed to escape, however, after which there was a double battle of luke and leia vs. vader and sidious. the twins found themselves quickly overwhelmed, and sidious was about to kill them--when the sight of the two children about to die in front of them instantly emptied the remainder of anakin’s heart gauge. finally feeling real love again for the first time in years, anakin killed his master and saved his twins. luke and leia then took him to a purification chamber to be fully restored.

CURRENT STATUS.

anakin has returned to preuzien to become one of its strategic gym leaders. his gym’s theme is sky battles, which are fought only by pokémon that can stay airborne such as flying-types and those with the ability to levitate. though this may seem to be restrictive, anakin can still fight with a diverse mixture of pokémon.

he’s actually a league member in two regions: preuzien, aka german prussia, and prutenia, the newly-instated old prussian nation. essentially he’s a diplomat but in many ways he’s the wrong choice because……darth vader, have you fucking met him? however, lotor deliberately chose someone who was angry and undiplomatic to fulfill this role because he wanted to make it very clear to the german prussians that the rights and sovereignty of the prūsai are completely non-negotiable and there is a guy in the prutenian league who will happily beat the shit out of anyone who says otherwise.

he and lotor have a very strained relationship. on one hand anakin has healed a lot since he left the sith, and he is very concerned because he sees lotor going down the same path as he did. but on the other hand he still has a long way to go yet acts like he’s 100% redeemed when he lectures lotor, and lotor sees right through this…then when lotor calls anakin out on the fact he still has issues, anakin gets all pissy. also, anakin correctly suspects that lotor is using him as an ally for his “chosen one” status, inviting him to the league and giving him a second chance in spite of him being vader because he wants to get on the legendaries’ good side by treating their chosen one well. basically them being colleagues is an Angry Bastard Disaster that they need a lot of sorting through if they are ever going to be on truly good terms.

one time anakin straight up “force choked” lotor using his psychic powers in a fit of rage. lotor taunted him by choking out the words “vader…you haven’t changed.” this could easily have led to lotor’s death, as anakin was highly emotionally charged, but instead of snapping his neck psychically at that moment he dropped him to the floor and left the room. a sign of hope in their relationship perhaps?

honestly he’s? still a fucking mess??? like just because he left the sith doesn’t mean his issues are over. he’s still angry over his mother’s death and over padmé’s death, and now he’s angry that he let palpatine manipulate him and suffers from crippling guilt that he nearly killed his two kids. not to mention psychologically he’s part machine now so he has forgotten how to be human in some ways, and it’s in this way that he still hasn’t stopped being vader.

he doesn’t feel love for anyone except his twins, majjis, and padmé. he feels small likings toward other people and pokémon and he is trying to turn that into something deeper, but he’s still extremely stunted.

he gets terribly impatient with humans when they’re not as precise or as exacting as he is. in the og movies darth vader hated anything that he perceived to be incompetence, and anakin is the same way…except now that he’s part metagross, his standard of “competence” is so far above anything humans can do that he inevitably gets irritated and lashes out at people just for being human.

he’s lost all interest in “the little things.” he doesn’t appreciate the warmth of a sunny day or the coolness of a soft breeze or seeing a pretty looking bug on the sidewalk or anything like that, the only thing he is fixated on 24/7 is sharpening his intellect. he’s kind of like sabrina in that way.

MISC.

this would be his battle theme, full stop.

he has an aegislash variant that is basically a lightsaber: the hilt is metal but the blade is pure energy. 

he is an overprotective dad and in that way he’s kind of a hypocrite, because of how he was once the biggest threat to his kids before he reformed. he gets rEAL FUCKING ANGRY when leia starts dating han solo, saying he’s just a street rat from orre and he’ll eventually stab her in the back and she’s like do i need to remind you of how you almost killed us?

he doesn’t need to hold out his hand to force choke someone bc that’s not how psychic powers in pokéverse work, he just does it because he’s a dramatic little bitch

he eventually has five grandchildren, all of which he gets overprotective toward. on luke’s side: ben skywalker. on leia’s side: jaina, jacen, anakin and ren solo. and if you thought him disliking han solo was bad, you should see his reaction when ren starts dating palpatine’s granddaughter rey…he just tENSES any time he’s around her saying i sense a great potential for evil in her and his kids are like oh really, well we’ve been sensing that in YOU ever since we met you and we don’t judge, so………damn i hate canon reylo but i mean it could work in an AU where kylo ren was never evil

[ashversion]

Original comments:

“You can't look at these movies (The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari, Nosferatu, The Golem, Faust) and deny that they literally defined the horror movie genre. Using lighting to create a mood? Name one director since the 1920's who doesn't do that. Besides Ed Wood, I mean. And how busy am I? This comic was in the making until 2:30 this morning. I'm going to bed.

***Later That Afternoon...*** Halloween is our second favorite holiday, right after Christmas. What other day of the year do we get to publicly act like a maniac? I'd rather do it all year, but people look at you funny if you so much as sing a song aloud. My favorite part is wearing a costume. I like playing a part, and it's fun to scare the kids who are raised on Casper the friendly ghost or something rather than Tim Burton. I've stopped trick-or-treating, not because I think I'm too old or anything, but because people would harass me about it. People asking us "Aren't you too old for trick-or-treating?" took a lot of the fun out of it. Besides, we always have leftover candy.”

-

And so begins the holiday comics.

I think it’s safe to say we’re the only people who have ever combined Pokémon with German Expressionism. Here’s the map:

[lifegoeson-wecarryon]

Youtube AU Chapter 4

YouTube AU That-Doesn'-Have-A-Name-Yet Words: 1014 AU Summary: Simon and Baz are popular YouTubers with a rivalry. Chapter Summary: Agatha takes a walk to the dog park. First Chapter | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter [ Yikes, I’m two days late. Sorry about that! Also, check out this beautiful fan-art by @cloudyrainyday ! ]

[Agatha] Because I'm moving to California in a few months, I've been throwing parties non-stop. It truly is exhausting. I'm glad that I'm taking a break. I might go down to the beach and take a few last pictures, I probably won't get another chance before I leave. God, why do I have to be so busy? Everyone expects me to throw these parties nearly every weekend, considering it's something I've been doing for years. But things grow old. Perhaps I'll throw parties in Cali. Hopefully, not as often. Maybe then, I'll actually have enough time to relax. I won't stop taking pictures, though. There will be a lot of places in Cali to photograph, and I'm going to get every bit of it. Maybe I'll get a dog or something, that'll be fun. Pulling my hair into a ponytail, I open my apartment door and make my way outside. I hear a scream coming from a few rooms down the hall, but I choose to ignore it. I already know what's going on down there, and I don't want to bother with it. I step outside into the cold air, taking a breath. After walking a few steps, I notice a man who seems familiar somehow. He has his hood up and it's hard to see his face, but I can see his eyes are dark, almost grey. I shrug it off, pulling part of my bangs behind my ear and starting in the direction of the local dog park. I don't actually own a dog- like I said, I might get one in Cali. But I have a few friends who own dogs, and the park is public. I can go there whenever I want, and watching dogs run around and be idiots is somehow relaxing. Sometimes I even take pictures. (With permission from the dog owners, of course.) My friend Minty said that she'd be there today with her German shepherd, Elvis. I love Elvis. He knows who I am, and always runs up to me to play fetch. You don't know how happy Minty is to see us get along. I'm going to miss them a lot when I move to Cali, but I'll make sure to visit every summer. I near the dog park and I see them playing. Elvis is in front of Minty with a ball in his mouth. "Elvis!" She calls out, pointing to me. "Look who it is!" I think it's a misconception that dogs are stupid and that you should baby talk them, but they play along with it because they love their owners. Elvis looks over at me, before he runs over and tackles me to the ground excitedly. "Haha, you've grown a lot, haven't you?" I say, holding him in my lap. He starts licking my face in greeting, before running back over to Minty. He comes back with the ball in his mouth, and drops it in front of me. "He really likes playing with you." "I know," I smile brightly. "I don't know what you'll do with him once I move to Cali." I throw the ball, and he runs out to catch it. "Must you leave so soon?" "Minty, I've been here for twenty years. It's time to move on." She shrugs. "Hey, I'll visit every summer." "And we'll talk on Skype?" "Of course." That cheers her up, and I let out a small laugh. Hours seemingly pass as minutes, and I'm surprised when I notice the sunset. Elvis calmed down a while ago and he's laying down in my lap. Minty is sitting on the park bench reading an eBook on her tablet, when she looks over to me. "It's getting late, Agatha. You should head home." I chuckle a bit, looking down at Elvis. "I'm kind of trapped at the moment.” She smiles. "Elvis? Elvis? Come here, boy." Elvis' ears perk up, and he quickly stands, before running over to Minty. "That's a good boy," She coos, pulling out a dog treat for him and putting it in his mouth. She's petting his head, and I already have my camera out. She smiles when he jumps up and starts licking her face, and I manage to get quite a few shots. I'll have to edit them later. "Agatha, are you taking pictures?" "I can't help it, you two are adorable." "I guess I should be glad I'm your friend, I don't have to pay you." We both laugh, and I stop when I notice that man again. He's walking down one of the many paths, looking at each and every dog he sees. I catch a glimpse of a smile on his face. "Agatha, everything alright?" Minty asks me, worriedly. I shake my head. "It's nothing, just thought I saw someone familiar." She looks behind her to where I was looking. "Him? Honey, I don't think I've seen that man before. He must be new to town." "I think he likes dogs." "What makes you say that?" "He's looking at every dog still here and smiling." "Well, I'm glad he doesn't like cats. I can't have a cat lover in my neck of the woods." I roll my eyes. "Cats are pretty cool too, and don't assume that he doesn't like them." "Yeah, they're cool, until they scratch your eyes out and bite the rest of your face off." "Dogs can do that too." "But they don't." I sigh, shaking my head. "I should head back. Doctor Who is on tonight." "You still watch that show?" "It's a classic." "It's 50 years old." "It's still running." "What is this, Pokémon?" "Shut up, you love Pokémon." "Fine." She sighs, shaking her head at me this time. There's a small smile on her face, however. "Go to your time lord." I laugh, standing up and turning away. Elvis tries to run up to me, but he's stopped by his leash. I turn around, walking towards him and scratching his head. "I'll be back again soon, okay?" I wave goodbye to them both, before making my way back to my apartment.

[preussischen-a]

Running The Gauntlet 1/?: Your Adventure Begins…With Government-Funded Child Abuse

So you thought Preuzien’s National Tournament was bad?

Wait until you find out what it takes to get there.

Like everything else the Prussians do, the entire Training system was developed because they didn’t think the traditional method was good enough. It became known as Running the Gauntlet, both domestically and internationally--named after a military punishment that Prussia was infamous for, in which soldiers were forced to strip half-naked and run between rows of fellow soldiers whipping them from both sides.

And while not even the Prussian League is harsh enough to do that to its trainers, that’s sure as hell how the journey feels.

[TW: Death, violence, child & animal abuse]

Welcome To Hell: The Starter Pack

Most regions offer one starter per person, of the Fire, Water or Grass typing. Thanks to Unit-style battling, however, Preuzien doesn’t do that shit. Preuzien is “above that”--young Prussian Trainers can think in more advanced and nuanced ways. Why? Because they’ve already committed to the program for an entire semester before they even pick their starters.

There is no “late bloomer” option for Trainers born in Preuzien. You either get your ass into two years of military--er, I mean Trainer School when you’re ten and do the whole hell run as a kid, or you don’t become a Trainer at all. (Note that you can get a Trainer’s license in Preuzien if you’re a foreigner who has already had League experience, which forces many “late bloomer” Prussian Trainers to go abroad first and then come back to the home league to apply for a foreigner’s license.) The good news is, Trainer school is completely funded by the government because Preuzien was one of the first countries to have universal education and so take it extremely seriously. The bad news is, well, everything else.

The Prussian Trainer School system has a rigorous, relentless curriculum in which the classes in the first year are specifically designed to be harder than a 10-11 year old can reasonably handle. They are not so much harder as to make learning impossible, but hard enough to make kids have at least one mental breakdown a semester over how stupid and inadequate they feel because of the speed at which advanced information is flung at them. In the second year, the courses are suddenly adjusted to meet the age level of their participants (11-12)--which tricks the young Trainers into feeling even more confident in the face of their insurmountable challenge, and ready to take on more. The point of this is to force children to learn the hard way what it means to overcome adversity, and toughen them for the even worse hell that will be their Trainer journeys. And the whole “weeding out the weak” sentiment is totally a thing, especially because the government doesn’t actually have the money to pay for all of its students--which is their dirty little secret. Of the 100,000 or so students who enter the government training academy every year, only 20,000 or so make it past the first year--and the Prussian education system actually plans a budget anticipating the four-fifths drop in the amount of students due to kids being too mentally broken to continue.

Want to back out already? Too bad, because you can’t get your Prussian Trainer’s License without this.

Trainers are given Pokémon based on their danger rankings, which go from Type I to IV, as I mention on one of my super old blogs here. Note that much of the information on that post is headcanon that I no longer take as my hc or am reconsidering, so I’m going to only reproduce the part that’s applicable, aka the tier system:

Type I Pokémon have been domesticated, present minimal danger to early Trainers, and are easily trained. If they are sapient, they are the most devoted to humans. This would include Pokémon like Pidgey, Rattata, Poochyena, etc. that most resemble their animal equivalents (seed-eating birds, rats and mice, dogs, etc.) Really, they’re no more harmful than the real-world household pet, and many young Trainers get their first taste of Pokémon handling with these guys before moving on to starters such as Bulbasaur, Charmander, Squirtle, etc.

Type II Pokémon have been domesticated, present a little more danger to early Trainers, and are reasonably well-trained. If they are sapient, they have a favorable opinion of humans. Within this tier are the formal starters that young Trainers receive alongside their licenses in traditional Leagues, as well as other “pet-like” creatures such as Shinx and Electrike. They differentiate themselves from Type I Pokémon because they can use more dangerous elemental attacks (Ember, Vine Whip, Water Gun, etc.), but if a young Trainer obtains them before the more serious attacks (Fire Spin, Leaf Blade, Water Pulse, etc.) are learned, they can still be pretty safe.

Type III Pokémon have not been domesticated OR are a more dangerous evolution of a domesticated species, are meant for medium-level Trainers, and are not necessarily obedient. If they are sapient, their society dislikes and distrusts humans. Obviously, humans haven’t had enough time (or capacity) throughout history to domesticate all 719 species, nor do many of the 719 species want to be domesticated. Essentially, these creatures are the type that Owen Grady would hang out with—they can be trained to like you, but they should be treated as wild beasts and given the necessary respect.

Type IV Pokémon have not been domesticated, are meant only for experts, do NOT tolerate chemical injections, and need special handling to ensure obedience. If they are sapient, they would be the ones to start a revolution. In the Jurassic Park of Trainer life, these Pokémon are the T. Rexes. They were really, really not meant for any contact with humans, not least because they see us as prey, or otherwise as an inferior species. Some are deadly because of their raw attack power, like Hydreigon and Gyarados, while others, like Alakazam, are dangerous because of their intelligence and bitterness toward human oppression. They absolutely MUST be socialized with humans and other Pokémon from a young age, or else they will never be trainable—and no matter what, nonsapient Type IVs will never go well with small children.

A Prussian Trainer’s first Pokémon is always a set of three Type I Pokémon, and one Type II of their choice—this constitutes the Trainer’s first Unit. They don’t even receive them, however, until the end of the first semester, which is when they rigorously study the basics of Typing and Unit battle mechanics but also some advanced strategies, and then the rest of their time at the center is spent putting what they learned into practice. As for catching new Pokémon, students are given exactly one-month catching intervals between the immersive battling sessions in which they set out with their advising groups and spend half the day learning academic subjects and half the day catching Pokémon. Advising groups basically do a backpacking trip throughout a huge section of Preuzien each month, and are then returned to their school via plane. There is no break between the rigors of being out in the wild catching Pokémon, and the grueling school schedule that ensues the day after one returns.

Worse Than My Mother’s Micro-Managing, Tbh

The daily schedule is intense. Students rise at exactly 5:00 A.M. and go to sleep at 10:00 P.M.—and they don’t have a choice in this, because there’s a building-wide alarm clock to wake them up, and at 11:00 P.M. all the electricity in the school instantly turns off except for heating and cooling. The schedule never changes Monday through Friday beginning in the second semester of the first year, with a small change at the end of Saturdays to allow for one-on-one consultations with the advisor.

5:00-5:15: Wake up and wash up.

5:15-5:30: Breakfast.

5:30-6:30: Strategy lecture for the entire school.

6:30-8:00: Drill session with advising group. Trainers and Pokémon both participate, as it is a Prussian custom for people and Pokémon to train with each other. This also provides a small opportunity for students to ask questions to the advisor about things they didn’t understand, and for the advisor to comment on the group’s progress as a whole. They have no qualms about humiliating students whom they feel have fallen behind.

8:00-8:30: Rest and plan for the battles ahead.

8:30-12:00: Students engage with each other in three 45-minute Unit-style battles.

12:00-1:00: Lunch and Pokémon care. Students learn the fundamentals of Pokémon healing as well as Pokémon battling during the first semester, and may only take their Pokémon to school caregivers in an emergency. New rankings are posted based on the results of the previous night and the day’s morning.

1:00-1:30: Recess.

1:30-6:30: Academic subjects are taught—45 minutes each for Math, Science, History & Philosophy (one subject), English and German, with 15-minute breaks in between. As mentioned before, academic subjects are more of a focus during the one-month Pokémon-catching intervals.

6:30-7:00: Dinner.

7:00-9:00: Two additional Unit-style battles on weekdays; one-on-one advisor consultations on Saturday.

9:00-11:00: Homework (though it’s surprisingly light), wash up and bed.

As for Sunday? Since Preuzien is an Arceist (Christian) nation, Sunday is seen as the “day of rest” even in the school, which holds a two-hour compulsory Calvinist Protestant religious service with no option to opt out if one practices a different faith. Though official rules expressly forbid training on Sunday, the school doesn’t bat an eye when people choose to anyway—to the point that training fields are booked up by overachieving students several Sundays in advance. Also, individual teachers hold mandatory training sessions for their students in flagrant violation of the official rule—which students have complained about, to no avail.

It should also be noted here that the school has absolutely no respect for any religion except its own. Doing the hard work and following the strict school schedule was far more important, even if that should trod over the holy days of another faith, and in the past, students were forbidden under any circumstances to take time off from the schedule to practice their religion, whether a few weeks for a holiday or a few minutes for a prayer—forcing them to do their religious practices in secret. Nowadays, though, it’s not much better. If someone of a non-Christian faith should request holiday time, they are actually penalized for it. They are forced to spend 1.5x the amount of time they “wasted” (and yes that is the actual word the school uses for their holiday time) making up lost training over the one-month summer break, which sometimes ends up consuming their break and puts them at a disadvantage against their well-rested Christian peers. It’s not even a good environment for Christians, either. Christian children who were raised devoutly to not work on Sundays are pressured and even bullied by Christian children who do train on Sundays because the toxic culture of the school regards resting on Sunday as “weak,” and non-Calvinists feel the same pressure to convert to Calvinism as non-Christians.

By the time they graduate from the training school at age 12, students already have Pokémon in the Level 50-60 range—and the Gym Challenge is all about getting their Pokémon to Level 100 for the League, which is yet another reason why the Prussian League is hands down the hardest League on Earth. When they graduate, Trainers are encouraged to leave behind Pokémon based on “merit,” which often translates to abandoning anyone you thought wasn’t good enough. Now here’s where it gets dark. If the Pokémon was “bad” enough, they are further encouraged to give the Pokémon a demerit. Thing is, the school doesn’t tell the kids that Pokémon--even sapient ones--who receive a demerit are euthanized by the school because they weren’t good enough. And the kids never find out because by the time they’re either consumed by the burdens of fame or chewed up and spit out by the system, they’re too bogged down by worldly concerns to remember or care about the Pokémon they left behind.

Forced to be Homeless

In the real world, most middle-class and upper-class Trainers who have the support of their parents will go from Gym to Gym by car or even plane; those you see traveling on foot are usually lower-income Trainers, Trainers from a higher socioeconomic status who were kicked out by/ran away from their parents, or Trainers from that higher status who seek the “real world” experience of roughing it (and usually run crying to their mommies for cash about two weeks later). But in Preuzien, all the riches and noble titles in the country won’t save you from a Training life lived at nature’s mercy. In this country, it is MANDATORY for every single Trainer, regardless of socioeconomic background, to travel on foot or by Pokémon.

And they are totally fucking serious about this. They were so fucking serious that even the bleating of the wealthiest, most spoiled Prussian families was not enough to change their minds--and keep in mind this is a country in which all goings-on were controlled by wealthy nobility for centuries. Using a mode of transportation that is not pre-approved by the League bureaucracy may even result in the revocation of your Trainer license--you will only receive the privilege to ride in a vehicle again once you have finished the Gym challenge. Only recently was the law changed to define “emergency” as encompassing a threat to the life of oneself or one’s Pokémon; in past years, you could save yourself by taking an ambulance, but you would be forced to let your Pokémon waste away if something should happen to them.

So Why The Hell Is Nobody Stopping This?!

Simple. It’s for the same reason that nobody stops injustice in the real world. Because sometimes the stars align in all the wrong ways, and there’s not much you can do about it.

Germany doesn’t like what Preuzien is doing. The world doesn’t like what Preuzien is doing. But not even the entire world can stop them because quite frankly, their efforts have fallen apart because they couldn’t get their shit together for two seconds to stop these flagrant Pokémon rights abuses and borderline human rights abuses from happening. 

Unova like America always has its head up its ass when it comes to international affairs, so it’s barely cognizant of what’s going on in Prussian Trainer schools. 

Alola, a former Unovese colony, literally just set up their League--and they’re too busy consolidating their own to worry about the problems of others.

Sinnoh fullheartedly supports the Prussian system, because it has its own normalized system of Pokémon and Trainer abuse. Therefore, it would not only see nothing wrong with the Prussian model, it might even find a kindred spirit in it.

Kanto is a governmental clusterfuck where it’s more likely than not everyone is just stoned, and Johto is too isolationist to care.

And Kalos was the country with the closest shot at stopping them, but Heureka Goeritz and Jötunheimr’s Army’s exposé on Kalos’s unethical continuation of the fascist Project Asgard halted its push for an International Pokémon League investigation of Prussian practices. And I mean, it’s not as though Project Asgard didn’t deserve to get exposed. It’s rather that one, Kalos was distracted from just about everything else they were doing by the human rights violation within their own borders--and two, Preuzien took advantage of that to completely discredit Kalosian attempts to correct anything they saw was “wrong” with the Prussian system.

As for Germany? Well. Since RL Prussia was a douche to the German government when it originally unified Germany, essentially seizing control of it and giving little representation for the other states, there’s no reason they couldn’t reestablish that system after an alternate history reunification in which Prussia/Preuzien came back from the dead. Which means they could be assholish enough to create a governmental blockade and shut down any attempts at League reform. And if I choose the route that Preuzien is independent from the South German states, there’s nothing South Germany can do to halt their crazy northern neighbor.

Clearly, the only change can come from within. But there isn’t a large enough impetus within Preuzien itself to change the system because most people think it’s for “the greater good” of Trainers. Remember, these abuses have been normalized. And the worst effect of abuse is that many times, the victims don’t even see it as a problem.