#going back into hibernation goodbye /j

[liz-zardii]

hello meet my genshin oc

her name is andreya, she’s from mondstadt and is electro sword

[lukef]

the fire is calling, and luke follows.

the wings of the bird echo so loud in his ears that he feels like he’s going deaf. it started as a murmur and developed itself into a roar, the roaring of destructive and enraged fire. it’s source is unclear, but he forces himself to stay, wait and follow the flames back into his core. deep furrows burn into the skin of his left arm and right shoulder, the bird uses it’s claws to take what’s theirs. like seeks like, birds of a feather flock together.

luke calls the fire, and the fire follows.

he’s been at this place before and the first thing he sees when he looks out of the window is trees burning. the wood is going up in flames and the sound of an explosion echos in his mind. then, silence. he watches as the fire takes and takes, watches as the life fades out of every single leaf as the smoke takes them in and the flames flicker higher. 

then, he closes his eyes again.

“i like you, luke, i really do. and i want to.. but i can’t.”

he tries and tries and tries, but no matter how hard he wants to understand what the other just said, the words don’t fit in his brain. 

“i’m just not capable of seeing the good that you see in me. and maybe that’s because i know i’m not a good person.”

he wants to scream, wants to yell at cassius. but it’s as if he’s frozen. he has never seen the other like this, so devastated. and as soon as he continues to speak, he knows that the other tells the truth.

“i’d ruin you.”

now, years later, the pain isn’t as bad as it used to be. a gentle sting in the left side of his chest and the distant memory of what his voice used to sound like. with his eyes still closed, he reaches out to touch the other’s cheek again, but his fingertips bump against the memory of someone he used to treasure more than everything. the fire reaches the window and the flames flicker high enough to reach one of the handkerchiefs placed on a commode. the fire takes and takes, and luke grants it.

“how long does it take to kill someone?”

he ignores the boy, who seems to be around eight or nine. being disturbed while meditating is definitely one of his least favorite things. 

“how long does it take to kill someone?” he repeats. “how long does it take to kill a human?” luke has no idea why the boy would approach him at the beach to ask such thing. as far as he remembers, he didn’t have fire elementlist written all over his face. he’s sure he has never seen him before, but he looks weirdly familiar. 

“how would i know how to kill a human?”

“she says you know.”

luke’s head shoots up and he’s greeted by warm and welcoming green-brown eyes, wavy brown hair and thousands of memories. he jumps up, “it can’t be.”, reaches out and watches as she falls apart and becomes ash, just from a single touch.

“destroy. kill. take. fire elementalists are the flames, they devour and kill and take until nothing’s left. once united, never divided.”

while luke cries into his hands greasy of ash, his younger self leaves.

as the fire comes closer, the heat reminds him of the long healed wounds on his arm and shoulder. after one and a half years, the wounds have become scars. the scars on his shoulder have been covered by tattoos months ago. luke knows what he is, and he has come to terms with it. even his hair resembles fire, dark brown merges into red.

the flames flicker higher and as they finally reach him, the whole room crumbles. he is left in between ashes and ruins.

“like seeks like. birds of a feather flock together. but compared to a sparrow, you have to be an andean condor.”

"Hey! Focus up, buddy, you coming or what?

luke had been so busy with meditating and burning his imaginary room down, that he almost forgot about the reason he was back to the seaside. when he finally opens his eyes and is blinded by sunlight, he feels like a bear awaking from hibernation. holding on to memories and letting the last three years pass in review seems to be a good thing when you came to say goodbye. luke smiles at the brunette and signals that he’s coming.

as he walks over, backpack in his hands and one of the shells he just found between his fingers to give it to her, he realizes that he has gotten used to being alone. 

but three years in umibe and abroad were enough. he’s going back to kadeu.

luke spent the last three years abroad. the paragraphs written in cursive are extracts from dreams, nightmares and memories that accompanied him. the solo portrays him meditating at the seaside of umibe, his way of accepting that a certain time in his life is coming to an end. 

the only person he has been in constant contact with is hyeonju. luke sent him a letter every two-three weeks.

after he returned from umibe, he has also returned to being a dueling instructor at the academy. his wrist is still decorated with the (now familiar) J, the letters KH and one arrow pointing down (representing the state of his favor with ace kang harold.)

to see more visuals/outfits/aesthetics, check out luke’s pinterest board.

[lizacstuff]

Bunch of anons about Carina and Roswell NM drama

Under the cut because it’s long and gossipy...

Anonymous said: Whatever nonsense Carina may have been up to with Jeanine and Nathan, both the leads have seemed to keep their private issues to themselves by not telling other cast or friends. That's why it angers me that the person who leaked the information disregarded Jeanine as a person and victim.

I’m of two minds on this.  On one hand I totally agree and I hate that Jeanine’s name was drug into this and her involvement was shared by the multiple inside sources, but on the other hand I do not like Carina, I think she was awful to work for, and I think it’s a good thing if it’s know in the industry that she created friction on set and was investigated by HR.  

She was so unprofessional, just from what we could see as fans, that she should NOT be put in charge of another show any time soon. So I think for the sake of people she will work with in the future, it’s a good thing it’s out there.  She has a whole lot of growing to do before she should ever work in television again. 

You make a good point about Jeanine and Nathan keeping their business to themselves.  Carina is out there over-sharing constantly, putting every neurosis on full display, and forcing half the cast to be out drinking and entertaining her on a regular basis. While those two, kept quiet and out of the spotlight. In interviews/panels they’ve both been completely professional, doing their jobs while also being charming, funny and eloquent.  

It was obvious to those of us watching closely that all was not well between J/N and Carina when the season started shooting. Carina was bitchier when she talked about them and those characters than she had been before, and J/N were nowhere to be seen in her braggy out-partyin’-with-my-cast IG stories and posts.  

As you say, it doesn’t look like J/N tried to drag any other cast or crew into whatever the issue was. I’m not sure the same can be said for Carina, that speaks volumes about the character of all involved. 

Anonymous said: I saw that abnormallyadam is doing a live social media thing with Jeanine and Vlamis soon. I guess we might get more information then and if Jeanine decides to say anything.

How hilarious would it be if Adam gets the scoop of a lifetime!?

I’m guessing this chat or whatever it is was set up before Jeanine and Vlamis knew the studio was going to swoop in and make their lives a whole lot better by firing Carina. So it will be interesting to see if it still happens on schedule or if it’s postponed for awhile.  

If it does go on, I think they will probably cover it really quickly and superficially like Vlamis did when he was schilling his merch the other night and then move on.  They won’t deep dive into it, that’s for sure. 

Anonymous said: Carina has been tweeting incessantly today! Like tweeting about other meaningless things won't make people forget lol. Also about that anon message you received about unfollowing nathan - wowwww she used to be up his butt.

Yes, remember the days when Carina used him as her social media crutch (every post she makes like that with a hot actor or country singer is basically her rampant insecurities saying: “hey look at the hot guy(s) who hang out with me and take pictures with me, it means I have value ya’ll!”) before she moved onto Trevino and then Vlamis.  So sad.   

They were clearly friends after The Originals and she invited him to audition.  I’m glad she did, he’s great in the role. Although it sounds like he was lucky that the President of the CW saw him and told her he was a leading man, since she didn’t see him as a lead. Sometime a friend’s preconceived notions might actually hold a person back... 

Who knows what happened, but just knowing human nature and Carina’s energy, I’ve always wondered if she thought she was going to have her friend on set and he was gonna be her social crutch, her go-to to entertain her and party with her, but right off the bat he and Jeanine got together so during the first season filming he wasn’t so much interested in the single, going-out partying lifestyle that she’s clearly addicted to and that rankled her a bit. Perhaps she lost her party buddy to her leading lady, and the loss of that attention “displeased” her. (to quote Kamran who said Carina told the writers to punish actors who displeased her by reducing their screen time. Interesting thought, no?)

Anonymous said: Well the interesting thing is some of the other people she follows don't post much either and she continues to follow them. Interesting interesting.

I know. She didn’t unfollow him because of that. That was definitely a show of cutting ties with him. It was probably in a fit of rage because she can’t unfollow Jeanine (because that would look terrible).  Also she has been so humiliated between being unceremoniously fired and losing her development deal with WB, the Hollywood Reporter article making her look terrible, and that writer spilling tea, that my guess is she’s hoping to shift focus to someone else and she knows unfollowing him will make us all wonder why. 

Anonymous said: Well shoot, maybe it was Nathan and not Jeanine who went to hr? And Carina found out? Or Nathan took the fall? Sorry I'm just going down a rabbit hole of conspiracy.

In my opinion there’s no reason to think those sources got it wrong. I would guess that Jeanine was involved, but that doesn’t mean it didn’t also involve Nathan.  Those two are a self-professed team, so no reason to think they wouldn't be in this instance as well. 

Anonymous said: Does this mean she'll unfollow Jeanine too??

I’m sure she wants to, but she can’t unless she wants to confirm that, yes, there was friction on the set and, yes, there was a specific problem with her leading lady.

Carina went out of her way to try and combat the “rumors” about her and Jeanine not getting along, addressing the situation in her goodbye post-- drawing more attention to it in the process-- so unfollowing her now would just make her look foolish and like everything she said was a lie and everything from the inside sources is true.  

Anonymous said: Carina will definitely do something stupid. She can't help herself. But even though there's no reason to follow Nathan, he's been inactive on Twitter for over a year and for her to unfriend now during this drama and mess...how is that a coincidence?

As I said above, I know it’s not a coincidence.  She’s dumb because by doing that she pretty much confirmed that there was friction on the set.  If there wasn’t, she wouldn’t be unfollowing the person in the main cast who she was closest too prior to the show. 

Part of me wonders if, as an old friend, she asked him for something (to defend her or a show of support) and he wouldn't do it.  Perhaps she’s most hurt by him not supporting her since they were friends before and she did give him a lead role on a network show (and also accidentally introduced him to his girlfriend.)  Maybe she thought he owed her and he didn't step up to defend her or even just give a tacit show of support by responding to her social media posts on leaving??

I’m guessing if he had come out of social media hibernation to give her one of those paltry “Thanks for everything” responses to her IG post like the other actors she wouldn't have unfollowed him. 

Anonymous said: Someone said the writer deleted all his tweets about Carina.

Not surprising, it was a crazy spree he was on, who wants to bet that he got contacted by a lawyer late Friday night?

I’m sure Carina was doing everything in her power to threatened him and to get him to stop. 

Anonymous said: I remember the writer also referring to Nathan as Carina's "friend." Is it in quotations because they are not actually friends? Frenemy? Carina was recently saying nice things about Nathan so based on her perspective, she thinks they were still on good terms?

Well they were apparently friends before he was cast, what happened after that is hard to say. They seemed fine during the promotion of season 1, but as soon as season 2 started filming, Carina’s tone when talking about him and Max got ugly and Nathan and Jeanine were staying far away from her socially. I mean Jeanine hosted a ladies Friendsgiving at their house, where 40 women from the cast and crew came over for a Thanksgiving feast, but the female showrunner wasn’t there. Hmmmm...

However, this spring things seemed to have thawed a bit.  Jeanine and Carina would occasionally like each other’s IG post (someone pointed out to me that had stopped during summer of 2019 and they didn’t engage with each other’s posts much if at all during S2 filming) Jeanine and Carina did that IG live and Carina was talking positively about Nathan and Max and seemed to be setting him up for a big season 3 with the dual roles and talking excitedly about that, so honestly, to me, it seemed like they had made their peace.  Perhaps Carina getting fired (and the straw that broke the camel’s back on that was clearly her idiotic tirade against the UK distributor) brought back up all the issues??? Or maybe Carina blamed them because of the prior issues? Or maybe they didn’t support her with the studio when she was trying to salvage her job? All I know is that Carina’s public behavior on social media is enough grounds to fire her, so she has no business blaming anyone but herself. 

Anonymous said: Someone said to the writer that jeanine, amber and nathan are staying silent on the matter and kamran replied that "Silence speaks louder than words." just above that they also were wondering who Carina harassed and bullied into silence? was it nathan?

Who knows... ask the writer. 

Anonymous said: Carina going from Zapit straight to writing for TVD is peak white privilege. After that THR article you could tell she believed a little too much how far that privilege would get her. Good riddance. Good luck getting another job for being such a big liability. I don't see any corporation hiring her again.

I think the only way she’s getting another job in TV anytime soon is if Julie gives it to her. She’s talented, once she grows up maybe she’ll be capable of running a show, but it was clear from the peanut gallery she should never have been given that amount of responsibility that she had on RNM. 

[ncts-nightnight]

2018-01

180101 또다시 365일이 주어졌어. 그 모든 날들을 행복으로 채우긴 힘들겠지만, 하루하루엔 분명히 작은 기쁨들이 들어있을거야. 놓치지 않고 만끽하길 바래! We're given with 365 days again. It will be hard to fill all those days with happiness, but there must be a little joy in every day. I hope you enjoy it without missing it. 180102 이런거 생각해봤어? 니가 좋아하는 단어, 좋아하는 모양, 좋아하는 옷은 뭐야? 제일 좋아하는 표정은? 늘 좋아하는 것들을 떠올리자. 그러면 늘 기분이 좋을거야. Have you thought about this? What is your favorite word, your favorite shape, your favorite clothes? Your favorite expression? Let's always recall things we like. Then, it will make you feel good.

180103 누군가 나에게 주는 믿음은 큰 힘이 돼. 하지만 그보다 더 큰 힘을 가진건 내가 나에게 보내는 믿음이야. 어떤 길을 가고 있더라도 우리는 믿음이 있다면 흔들리지 않아. The faith that someone else has in me can give me lots of strength. But more powerful than that is the faith that I have in myself. No matter what way we are going, we will not waver as long as have faith. 180104 다시 만날 수 없는 사람, 그 뒷모습을 지켜보는 아쉬운 마음. 오늘을 배웅하는 이 순간에도 그런 마음이 들어. 나한테 와줘서 고마웠어, 잘가. The person whom you can't meet again anymore, the sense of regret felt when watching that back view. Bidding farewell today at this moment, I feel that way too. Thank you for coming to me, goodbye. 180105 좋은 일이 많았어도 내가 만족하지 않음 괜찮은 날로 기억되지 않을거야. 힘들었어도 그래. 자기전에 한번 기분좋게 웃을수 있다면 그렇게 나쁜날로 남진 않을거야. Even though there were lots of good things that happened, I wouldn't be satisfied and remember it as a good day. It's the same when it's tiring. Before sleeping, if you can smile happily, it won't remain as such a bad day. 180106 내 마음에 필요한 말을 영화나 드라마에서 우연히 만날때가 있어. 그런말을 만나는건 행운이야. 두고두고 대단한 힘이 되어주니까. 일상에도 그렇게 우릴 위한 명대사가 많으면 좋겠다. Sometimes we come across words that our heart needs coincidentally from a movie or drama. Coming across such sayings is luck as it becomes an amazing strength for a long time. In our daily life, it'll be nice if there are lots of such memorable sayings for us too. 180107 내 마음에 필요한 말을 영화나 드라마에서 우연히 만날때가 있어. 그런말을 만나는건 행운이야. 두고두고 대단한 힘이 되어주니까. 일상에도 그렇게 우릴 위한 명대사가 많으면 좋겠다. It's said that time is the solution to everything but actually, that's not done by time. It's something that's accomplished by conquering over myself for a long long time. In the end, all of them are things that are accomplished by myself. 180108 어떤게 행운을 갖다준다고 믿어? 네잎클로버? 행운의 동전? 소원팔찌? 그냥 너 자신이 행운을 부르는 존재라고 믿어보면 어때? What do you believe will bring you luck? 4-leaf clover? Lucky coin? Wish bracelet? How about trying believing that your own existence brings you luck? 180109 내일은 얼마나 추울까? 일기예보를 보다가 이런 생각이 들어. 일상에도 예보가 있어서 내일을 준비할 수 있으면 좋겠다. 그런데 그럴 수 없겠지? 내일은 예정된게 아니라 내가 만들어나가는 거니까. How cold will it be tomorrow? While looking at the weather forecast, a thought like this came to mind, if there's a forecast of our daily lives, it'll be nice to be able to prepare for tomorrow. But that won't work. Tomorrow is not something that can be anticipated but is something that I create. 180110 미끄러운 길을 걸을 땐, 걸음에 더 집중하게 돼. 복잡한 소음 속에선 옆사람의 소리에 더 귀 기울이게 돼. 가끔은 일상을 방해하는 것들이 내가 하려는 일에 더 간절히 집중하게 해. When walking on the slippery road, you become more focused on your steps. In the midst of noise, you listen more attentively to the voice of the person beside you. Sometimes, the things that disrupt my daily life make me do things in a more earnest way. 180111 찬 바람엔 옷깃을 꽁꽁 여미게 되는 것처럼 차가운 사람 앞에선 마음을 여미게 돼. 늘 햇살처럼 따뜻한 사람이 되자. 그럼 모두가 마음을 열어줄거야. Just like adjusting your collars tightly because of the cold wind, adjust your heart/mind when you're in front of a cold person. Let's always be a warm person like the sunshine. Then everyone will open up their hearts for you. 180112 편안한 사이를 위해선 어쩔 수 없이 시간의 도움을 받아야 해. 편안함은 오랜 시간이 깃들어야만 완성이 되니까. 그래서 우리 사이가 대단하고 소중해. For a comfortable relationship, there's no choice but to receive the help of time. Because comfort has to seep in through a long time for it to be completed. Hence, our relationship is amazing and precious. 180113 내 모든 말에 귀 기울여주는 사람, 내 말에 한걸음 다가와서 반짝이는 표정으로 듣는 사람. 그런 사람은 사랑하지 않을 수가 없어. The person who listens attentively to all of my words, the person who takes a step closer to me with a glowing facial expression while listening to my words. You can't help but to love such a person. 180114 가끔은 감정도 소리나 향기처럼 공기를 타고 전해���는것 같아. 좋아하는 마음, 설렘 이런것들은 옆사람에게 숨김없이 전해지잖아. 그래서 우리가 같이 있으면 행복한가봐~ Sometimes emotions seem to be transmitted through the air like sound or fragrance. Feelings of fondness and excitement, things like these are transmitted to the person beside you without being hidden. Hence, it seems like when we are together, we're happy! 180115 누구의 기준에도 맞추지 않고 그 누구의 기분도 계산할 필요 없는. 그래서 가장 나다운 나로 있을 수 있는 시간. 바로 지금이야. There's no need to match somebody else's standards and calculate that somebody's mood. The time when I can be most like the way I am. It's right now. 180116 밥은 먹었어? 옷은 잘 챙겨 입었고? 추우니까 따뜻하게 입고나가~ 내일은 우리가 먼저 엄마에게 저런 말을 해보면 어떨까? Have you eaten? Did you dress up warmly? It's cold so dress up warmly before going out. Tomorrow, how about saying such words to our mum first? 180117 하늘, 바람, 공기. 늘 우릴 둘러싼 것들에서 벗어나긴 힘들어. 그래서 어쩔수 없이 날씨에 기분이 따라게 돼. 오늘밤 우리 모두에게 기분 전환이 필요해. Sky, wind and air. It's hard to free ourselves from things that are always surrounding us. Hence, we can't help it but our mood changes according to the weather. Tonight, we all need a change of atmosphere. 180118 이 순간이 지나고 있는게 아깝고 아쉬운 건, 내가 지금 행복하기 때문이겠지? 우리 내일도, 모레도, 매일매일 이렇게 아쉬워하자. The fact that I feel regretful and upset that this moment is passing by is because I'm feeling happy now right? Tomorrow, the day after and everyday too, let's feel regretful like this. 180119 칭찬의 힘, 참 대단하다는 말을 자주 듣잖아. 우린 그럴 때 마다 서로를 더 자주 칭찬하고 주고 받아야겠다고 생각을 해. 그런데 다른 사람 말고 너를 더 칭찬해줘. 오늘도 칭찬할거 많지? We always hear that the power of a compliment is amazing right? I think we should always give compliments to each other more. However, start by complimenting yourself, not others. Today, aren't there are lots of things to compliment? 180120 나 스스로를 과잉보호 할 때도 있어. 세상에 나섰다가 실패할까봐, 다칠까봐, 나서지 않고 나를 감쌀 때. 그런데 우리, 그렇게 약하지 않아! There are times when I overprotect myself too. The times when I'm stepping into the world and I'm afraid of failing and getting hurt, I don't step forward and just shelter myself. However, we are not that weak! 180121 몸에 안좋은거 알면서 못끊는것처럼 마음에 안좋다는걸 알면서도 못 끊는 것들이 있어. 나랑 안맞는 사람, 이루어지지 않을 짝사랑, 해결되지 않을 고민들. 마음에 정말 안좋아. Like how we can't stop even knowing that it's not good for our body, there are also things we can't stop even though they are upsetting. The people who don't get along with us, the unrequited one-sided love and the worries that can't be resolved. It really doesn't feel good. 180122 재밌는 일도, 좋은 사람도, 계속 같이 있으면 시시해지고 소홀해져. 뭐든 늘 곁에 있으면 결국은 소중함을 잃어. 모든 순간 행복이 내 곁에 있어주지 않는 이유, 그래선가봐. Fun things and nice people, if they are always here, they turn dull and we become indifferent towards them. If everything is always here by our side, eventually its preciousness is lost. That seems to be the reason why happiness is not present by my side in every moment. 180123 오늘처럼 추운밤 황량한 겨울나무 끝을 봐. 거기 매달린 겨울눈속엔 아주 작은 봄이 들어있어. 우리 맘에도 늘 그렇게 희망이 분명히 들어있어. On a cold night like tonight, look at the barren winter tree tops. Inside the winter bud, it contains a really tiny spring. Inside us too, hope is always definitely there. 180124 어린 아이한테 어려운 문제를 내주고 못푼다고 나무라는 사람은 없잖아, 세상은 우리한테 이길 수 있을 만큼의 무게만 지워줘. 이만큼은, 할수있어. No one gives a young child a difficult question and scolds the child for not being to solve it. The weight that the world puts on us is only as much as how much we can overcome. This much, we can do it. 180125 늦게 집으로 돌아가는 길, 피곤하고 힘들지만, 같은 시간 집으로 향하는 사람들, 여전히 불켜진 가게들을 보면 위안이 돼. 우리 서로가 서로에게 위로가 돼. On the way back home late at night, although it's tiring and tough, we feel consoled looking at the people who are heading home at the same time and the shops that are still lighted up. We become each other's consolation. 180126 겨울잠 자는 동물들, 푹 자고 깨어나면 눈앞에 초록빛 따뜻한 세상이 펼쳐져있겠지? 우리도 오늘 푹 자고 일어나면 따스하고 설레는 일들만 다가와있으면 좋겠다. Animals which hibernate during winter, when they wake up after a good sleep, a green world will unfold in front of their eyes right? Us too, if we sleep well today and wake up, it'll be nice if there are only warm and exciting things approaching us. 180127 지금이 최강한파! 다음주엔 날씨가 풀립니다. 내일은 나아질거란 말에 강추위도 버틸수 있어. 일상이 견디기 힘든날에도 누군가 이렇게 말해주면 좋겠다. 오늘이 제일 힘든날! 내일부터는 반드시 나아집니다. It's the strongest cold wave now! Next week, the weather will thaw! With the words 'tomorrow will be better', even if it's extremely cold, we can endure it. In our daily life, on a day when it's hard to endure, it'll be nice to tell someone this. Today is the hardest day! From tomorrow onwards, it'll surely get better! 180128 아무말을 하지 않아도, 한번도 웃지 않아도, 어떤 노력이 없어도, 기분 좋게, 편안하게 한 공간에 있을 수 있는 사람. 주말 밤엔 그런 사람과 함께였으면 좋겠어. Even without saying anything, without laughing even once, without having to make any effort, the person who makes it feel nice and comfortable just by being in the same space. It'll be nice to be together with someone like this on a weekend night. 180129 종일 마주치는 많은 사람들이 우리의 기분을 물들여. 그래서 가끔은 내 의지와 상관없이 내 기분이 어두워질 때도 있어. 하지만 지금 이 시간의 기분은 오직 나만이 선택하 수 있어. Our mood is influenced by the huge number of people that we come across all day. So there are times when my mood becomes gloomy against my will. However, my mood at this current moment can only be chosen by me. 180130 가끔 다른 사람들은 꽤 재밌게 사는것처럼 느껴져. 그래서 그 사람의 일상을 들여다보는데 꽤 많은 시간을 쓰기도 해. 근데 그 시간에 나를 위한 일을 하면, 내 일상이 진짜 재밌어지지 않을까? Sometimes, it feels like other people are living really interestingly. So we even use lots of time to look into other people's everyday lives. But if I use that time for things that are for my own sake, won't my daily life become more interesting? 180131 오늘은 별로였어, 내일부터 잘해야지, 생각하는 순간 오늘은 미완성이 돼. 아직 한시간 남았잖아, 오늘을 멋지게 완성해보자. The moment you think that today wasn't good and that you need to do better tomorrow, today becomes incomplete. There's still one hour left! Let's try to complete today cooly!

korean transcript: @valentinesboy97 korean-english translation: @fluffywhitie, @jaehyunbom__

[trashy-greyjoy]

am i the only one who lost complete faith in bellarke the shows been om air for 4 years and the one final opportunity they had to kiss shouldve been right b4 they separated for 6 years they both were walking into their potential deaths and it just makes no sense how there wasnt at least a confession. then i remembered the writers are still pandering to antis who never shut up so it pretty much made me think that legit every small moment that has been given to us is bait for us to stay watching

2/2 you seem like one of the voice of reasons in the fandom and i just had to get it off my chest im just pretty sure the writers are baiting us all along for when they bring you know who back in the series finale or something its so sad bc we stuck around for so long and idk im pretty sure everyone has this feeling that bellarke will never happen so the antis will be happy. i wish theyd realize most of general audience prefers bellarke idk im just sad i wasted my time on this show for 4 yrs

Hello nonny! Not worry I am here to restore your faith in all things canon blarke and s5 is our time! I totally feel your pain, sometimes even I get in those ‘blarke is never gonna fuck what’s even the point’ moods, but i have some long ranting posts ill shoot your way so you have some things to think about and hopefully it'll raise your spirits! (also you saying I'm a voice of reason made me laugh because in all honesty I'm a huge emo mess )

About the kiss being in the s4 finale. at first I really thought it would happen too, since if they think they're gonna die they should confess and make out, except, they didn't think that, at least Bellamy didn't. He thought they were gonna have 5 years of the 2 of them stuck in space to figure it out and be together so he didn't feel the pressure to have to confess before they went up. Clarke probably didn't do anything because she was almost certain she was going to die and she probably didn't want to put all that on Bellamy if he was just going to lose her anyway. Thats especially easy to notice if you pay attention to the face caress scene where she seems light hearted and happy looking at him and then she remembers her mom’s vision. And if you recall there were two separate instances where one of them tried to either confess or say goodbye and the other wouldn't let them (Bellamy before clarke went to the island and Clarke before the head and heart convo). ALSO leaving the confession up in the air gives the opportunity for them to add a lot of conflict with bellamy not getting to tell her going into next season. So when you think about that, it makes a lot of sense for them not to have kissed in the finale.

About the writers pandering to a certain audience, I agree. they name dropped L at unnecessary and excessive points last season to pacify the antis as best as they could. I get it, I hated it, it hurt Clarke’s character, and it wasn’t needed, but like i get what they were trying to do, unsuccessfully. HOWEVER I don't think that'll be a problem going forward. The time jump allows time for Clarke to have grieved and moved on in the last 6 years. She’s not fresh off the loss of a loved one and she’s been able to come into herself and move on essentially. AND the writers have been active on Twitter, and talking about Bellarke for the first time since S2 which is a big deal. They’re out of their Post-L Hibernation and they feel safe, well at least safer, talking about Bellarke on social media, meaning they’ve moved on from trying to pacify the antis in that regard. I think we’re pretty much over seeing them directly pandering to the CL’s at this point. 

Running off of that there’s also the scripts that the writers release, which have so far been pretty Bellarke heavy with the “another piece of her soul on the line”, “kill another person who she loves”, every part of the finale scripts and Bellamy’s “heart screaming”. Like... they released a script canonically saying Clarke loves Bellamy (and in a romantic way since the only other person she loved that she killed in canon was Finn). They’re putting it out there.

There’s no way they’re going to bring L back. Jason said she’s dead and not coming back. ABC has said it. And she’s trying to stay as far away from this show and that character as possible right now, she’s moved on she’s not going to come back. 

As for baiting, yeah they stretch it out and a lot of people think 4 season is unrealistic, but I say time and time again, when you look at canon slow burns and how long they take, 4 seasons, not even full seasons let me remind you, is child’s play. Mulder and Scully took 7 seasons to kiss and almost the whole 9 seasons to be fully canon on the show. Stiles and Lydia took 6 seasons to be canon, Rick and Michonne took 4ish seasons to go canon (still more episodes than The 100′s current 58). Booth and Brennan, Fitz and Simmons, Harvey and Donna (I see you Ana), Ron and Hermione, they all took years and almost twice as long as Bellarke have. It’s how television works. It’s annoying and it’s unrealistic a lot of the times, but its a trope, it follows a pattern, it’s how television shows grab a certain type of viewers and and ensure that they can keep them for the run of the show. Because it’s widely believed by the tv industry that once the ‘will they won't they’ aspect is gone, viewers lose interest so they string it out as long as they think they can. Whether its true or not thats how it works. 

There are also two more major reasons I think, or rather I know, Bellarke are endgame. The 6 Year Separation, and the fact that That’s The Story Jason Is Writing. 

I have separate long posts for these on my blog so I’ll be brief and link those for further reading, but to start off, extended separations are romantic tropes. Being separated for years and thinking the other person is or could be dead is a tried and true romantic Hollywood trope. Almost every example of this in entertainment, be it tv, books, or film, has romantic connotations surrounding it. The entire post about it can be found right here, if you want the low down, which I suggest. I list off other examples and proof in it. 

Moving towards Jason writing romantic Bellarke, it’s what he’s doing. If you look back at all the pivotal ‘Bellarke’ scenes in the past, Jason or Aaron have written a good portion of those episodes. Jason, the show runner, and Aaron, the guy he was ready to have take over if his other show got picked up. That combined with how many times he’s said that this is ‘Clarke and Bellamy’s story’ and in the past (S1-2) how free he was when speaking about Bellarke on social media. It’s always been the plan. He just likes to pull a Chris Carter (show runner of The X-Files, and the OG JRoth) and try to drag it out and deny it as much as possible. Seriously look up some of the stuff CC has said about Mulder and Scully in the past and it fits the same pattern. You can find the full post right here, where I give quotes and explain everything further. 

Taking a turn for a second, you can also think about the fact that tv shows almost NEVER put their big endgame together until the end of the show is approaching, especially if it’s between the two series mains. They don’t give that to you early on, that’s why most bigger ships in tv are at least partially slow burn, they don’t put the big couples together in the first season or two.

And I guess to close out, you can think about the fact that S1 Bellamy is set up as a romantic interest for Clarke from the beginning. His character and their relationship follow the ‘enemy/bad boy isn't actually that bad and actually has a heart and realizes that when he meets the good girl that challenges him’ like come on my guys... they’re set up as a trope from episode 2 when he saves her, and then episode 3 when he stares at her killing Atom and he gets all soft and realizes she’s not who he thought she was. It even comes complete with the jealous canon love interest and the ‘we’ve been through a lot together”

Never mind, I have one more point. Look at the sizzle reel for next season. It’s set up to make Bellarke look romantic or at least intimately connected. I have another long post for that one right here. 

I hope that did the trick for reassuring you at least partially and now we can all stew in this hellatus for a few more months before this hell shit returns to us!