#gordan merkel one shot

[hecohansen31]

KINKTOBER (20: Loss of Virginity)

Gordan Merkel+Poet! Reader:

Hey lovelies!

This is my first fic on Merkel ever, so if you ever want to anymore asks, please let me know!

Also the concept of this belongs to the lovely @emmyrosee so please check out her blog, because we stan (1) queen, much love to you!

From the list of prompts by @rougepetale​.

SUMMARY: It was fate who brought them together, but it is war separating them. Will their last goodbye be hurtful or sweet?

WARNINGS: Loss of Virginity/ Unprotected Sex (... don’t do like Merkel... wrap it up)/Oral Sex (Female Receiving).

You and Merkel had basically grown up together, childhood friends since the start.

So, when he had joined the “Resistance” you hadn’t stopped at nothing to follow him, in your own way.

You had always been good with words, they flowed so easily from your mouth and onto the paper page that you couldn’t help but write what you felt, being repressed by a competitive regime, that stopped others from expressing themselves and meet again with their family, from which they were separated by the big and feared Wall.

You hadn’t thought you could become such a phenomenon but once your brother, who worked on the streets alongside Merkel had told you that the Stasi had started wondering who was “the bitch, who wrote those offending poems that they found everywhere in the city”.

You had started writing even more dramatic poems, speaking more freely and eventually it got you caught.

The fact that even international espionage agencies had started being involved in Berlin was enough for Merkel to freak out and order you out of the country, getting somebody to bring you with them abroad in secret.

But you hadn’t wanted to leave him and this had made you start an argument with him.

“You fucking don’t understand, (Y/N)!” he screamed at you, making you back up into the wall, where you stood onto, shielding your body slightly with your hands and Merkel backed immediately up understanding your discomfort “… I can’t have you running around, putting yourself in dangerous situation, anymore, the situation is fucking serious!”.

“…I know, Merkel” you weren’t stupid so you knew perfectly what he meant “…but it would break my heart to leave you here”.

“You don’t understand how much it hurts me” he mumbled, whispering slowly and grabbing your hand, bringing it to his cheeks, flamed and hot due to his own rage mixed with the love he felt for you.

The girl he had always considered nothing more than an annoying bother, always clutching at him, was now the one he would die for, had anything happened to you.

Like it might happen during those times.

Not only he was having trouble dealing with Percival, but the new agent from the UK didn’t make it easy for him and all he wanted was to have just one less thought, with you away somewhere safe…

… somewhere far away from him.

It pained him to think about it, but knowing you safe brought him more comfort than knowing you in Eastern Berlin, risking your life.

“… but it is the only way out of this I see” he mumbled softly, his voice becoming a whisper meanwhile he brought you in a strict hug, feeling you sniffle in his arms, slowly becoming more and more loose in his arms, giving yourself up to your own fate.

“I don’t…” you mumbled meanwhile a sob shook your tiny body, so tiny in his arms and so frail “… don’t think that I can live without you, Gordan”.

He gently kissed your forehead and then pushed back to look at you in the face, muttering softly.

“You can and you will” he promised you, watching deeply in your eyes, before softness overtook him and he find himself strangely tearing up a bit “… how will I survive without you constantly annoying me?”.

You pushed him away, with a dark stare in your face, giggling shyly at his own joke, meanwhile you taunted him with a few fists to his chest, with had no effect on him although he faked to surrender under them.

But one hit him just right and you found yourself tumbling on the floor with him, one on top of the other.

You were confused by the sudden situation, not knowing if you had gone further than your usual friendship, mostly since Gordan’s lips were just under yours, a slight pressure towards the ground and you…

… he kissed you before, it was so sudden that you were taken aback, but quickly relaxed yourself into it, letting him take the lead to what was a sweet kiss, a farewell of some sorts and wanting more, desperately.

Even more with the way he grasped your clothes tight, almost wanting to rip them from your body.

You had to stop him, more to calm your quickening heart and regain your stolen breath, than from true disgust or rejection.

“I am sorry” he muttered, confused and not knowing whether he had wronged you or…

“… does your heart beat as quick as mine?” your hand pushed itself onto his chest and felt his heart rapidly beats against it, effectively answering your question ”…I have been feeling like this since I first met you, and you were nothing but an arrogant older boy”.

“… so… you can sprout insults but I can’t…” he mumbled, getting another hit on his chest, but a kiss to his lips soothed him.

And before you knew it, you were on the small bed of your childhood room, with your childhood friend, holding you closer to him than you thought was possible, meanwhile he laid sweet kisses onto your body, not forgetting any spot, as if he wanted to commit every part of your body to his memory.

The thought made you almost feel as if you already were missing him, as if he was already gone from your life.

You tightened your grip on him, and grabbed his hair in your hands, meanwhile he went down on you, sharing your juices with him, as he gently rubbed your clit, making you feel better and taking for a bit your mind off the dreadful thought of being separated by on ocean.

He brought you over the edge, after holding you onto it for quite a bit.

And then his member rubbed against your tender skin, still sensitive from you high, and you couldn’t help but blush a bit, slightly stilling in his close grip.

Something which didn’t go unnoticed by him, who gently peppered your face and neck with small kisses to make you relax and face him.

“What is wrong, little katze?” he mumbled as soon as he got your attention, no matter that you tried to avoid staring him in his beautiful eyes, eventually giving up and whispering your little secret.

“You are my first, Gordan”.

This left him wide-eyed and a smirk appeared on his face and you hid your face to your side, muttering something about making his ego just stronger, pushing him away, but he just made you face again, gently brushing his member against your clit, making you arch onto the bed.

“… I’ll make it special, if you want me to be your first” he said, caressing your sweaty hair out of your face, tracing with his thumb your lips “… I would have bought candles and flowers and all the shit, had I know it… and if you want to wait… we can…”.

“I don’t need “all that shit”, Gordan” you giggled, this time being the one that made him blush “… I just need you, and the thought of losing you, makes me so so…”.

“I don’t want to rush you…” he whispered onto your lips, before he laid a kiss there and you couldn’t help but smile into it.

“…I am ready, Gordan” you muttered, against his lips, caressing them one last time with yours “… I don’t want anybody else other than you, as my first”.

You saw tears shine again in Gordan’s eyes, but he ducked them down quickly to focus on the task ahead, entering you slowly and letting you get adjusted to it, meanwhile you hissed due to the painful intrusion.

Quickly Gordan’s hand joined yours and his lips went to your forehead, whispering sweet nothings in your ear, meanwhile he gently started moving as you squeezed back his hand, giving him the possibility to move, in you.

And with that you lost your last drop of innocence, blood coating the sheets as you laid in each other’s arms once it was all done, a phantom pain gently sobbing between your legs, but the knowledge that your last memory of your best-friend-turned-lover was so sweet, soothed any pain.

You would miss him, but you knew you would meet again.

You had grown up together, fallen in love and you had no doubt love and happiness were in your future.

You just had to wait.

---

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[sir-skarsgard]

Prompt List

My list of prompts that I’ve found on the internet or from movie quotes for one-shots; pick a character, pick one or more dialog prompts below and send in a request! Maximum prompts per request is three. 

List of character I will do: 

Axel Cluney (Deadpool 2)

Bob Gray (IT) 

Henry Pearl (Battle creek)

Gordan Merkel 

Mark (Assassination Nation) 

Mickey (Villains 2019) 

Roman Godfrey (Hemlock Grove) 

The Kid (Castle Rock) 

1: “Sometimes I get sad and I don’t know why. I’m sorry.” 

2: “I hope you find the happiness you pretend to have.” 

3: “I would love you in any shape, in any world, with any past. Never doubt that.” 

4: “If your life had a face I’d punch it.” 

5: “Do you have any fucking clue what you do to me?” 

6: “Sometimes I wish I could turn back time. Not to change anything, just to feel some things twice.” 

7: “I feel like I should stop thinking about you, but I can’t” 

8: “It’s a classic. He/she loves someone else.” 

9: I think you’re enough. You’re enough for you. You’re enough for me.” 

10: “I have nothing.“ “You have me. Am I not enough?“ 

11: “ I shouldn’t be jealous, he/she isn’t/aren’t even mine to be jealous over.” 

12: “Who am I to be in love when your love was never for me?” 

13: “Except for being a bit fucked in the head, I’d say he/she’s normal.” 

14: “I love you. I knew it the moment I met you. I’m sorry it took me so long to catch up.” 

15: “Words... how little they mean when you’re a little too late.” 

16: “It’s a party. So I’m pretending to have fun.” 

17: “When was the last time you were hugged?” 

18: “How can someone just not be there anymore?”  

19: “That wasn’t very romantic. Kind of gross too.” 

20: “I’m not a person you should fall in love with.“ 

21: “I don’t mind you breaking my heart.” 

22: “Do you know how it feels when the person you love the most tells you that you shouldn’t love them?” 

23: “Just admit it; you want to kiss me.” “Or maybe you want to kiss me and you think using reverse psychology is going to make me kiss you.” 

24: “Did you really just push that guy/girl off the couch so you could cuddle with me?” ‘Yes.” ‘This is why I love you.” 

25: “Is there at particular reason you’re in my room half-naked?” 

26: “Oh, would you look at that. There’s nowhere to sit besides my lap.” 

27: “Can I have some of that blanket? I’m freezing.” 

28: “Why are you so jealous?” 

29: “What’s the matter, love?” “Nothing, I’m just a little sad.” “Come here.” 

30: “I know I’m supposed to be mad at you, but I miss you so much.“ 

31: “What did I ever do to you?” 

32: “I’m just scared that you’ll leave me one day.” 

33: “I wanna kiss you so bad right now.” “So then kiss me.” 

34: “I can’t sleep. I had a nightmare again.” 

35: “I can’t have a proper conversation if you’re shirtless.” 

36: “Holding you in my arms is the best feeling in the entire world, and I don’t ever want to give that up.” 

37: “You know I’d never leave you. I love you too much and I’m too selfish to walk away.” 

38: “Did you... shit, that was smooth as fuck.” 

39: “You’re better than my favorite fictional character, and that’s saying a lot.” 

40: “You may not be my first girlfriend, but you‘re the only one that matters.“ 

41: “Out of all the things I like to eat, you’re my favorite.” 

42: “I always joke around because it makes you smile and I love seeing you smile.” 

43: “Why are you so quiet around me?” “Because I’m worried I’m gonna say something stupid and scare you away.” 

44: “Stop looking at me like that!” “I’m sorry to have to be the one to inform you, but that’s what eyes do.” 

45: “My mom would love you.” 

46: “I’ll always be there.” 

47: “You can miss someone and still be mad at them.” 

48: “The more people you let into your life the more they can just walk right out.” 

49: “Why are you like this?” “Unresolved daddy issues.” 

50: “I was being sarcastic.“ 

51: “It’s no big deal.” 

52: “You scared the shit out of me.” 

53: “Thanks, but no thanks.” 

54: “That’s easier said than done.” 

55: “Wow, you look like shit. What can I do for you?” 

56: “I don’t believe in love at first sight, but if you’re willing to walk by again I think I can make an exception.” 

57: “I loved you.” “You did what?” 

58: “Listen.” “What am I listening for?” “Nothing, I just wanted you to shut up.” 

59: “We need the cavalry.” “I am the cavalry.” “Fuck you mean you’re the cavalry?” “I’m all that’s left.” 

60: “Do you think you could ever love me again?“ “I never stopped loving you.“ 

61: “I need a favor.” “I already gave you a favor and you got my girlfriend shot.” “She’s alright.” “And? That doesn’t change anything.” 

62: “You have this smile.” “What kind of smile?” “The type of smile that would be cruel not to kiss.” 

63: “Sorry I’m not a heartless bitch like you.” 

64: “I’m sorry I wasn’t the friend you deserved, but you were the friend I needed.” “You’re saying that like you’re never going to see me again.” “I’m not. I’m leaving.” “But you just came to make amends!” “No, I came to apologize.” 

65: “If you think, for even a second, that I wouldn’t risk everything for her/him, then you’re wrong.” 

66: “I love you.” “I love you, too.” “Do you?” “Hey, you know you’re mine.” “Yeah, but are you mine?” 

67: “People are so quick to leave. It doesn’t matter if they're all you have.” 

68: “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you while I was hurting.” 

69: “It hurts so much, and you don’t understand how much it hurts. You don’t care because it’s not happening to you.” 

70: “I can’t do this anymore. I can’t just sit here and wait for you to come back.” “I don’t want that either.” “Then stay!” “I can’t.” “Then leave. Leave and do not come back.” 

71: “I love my boyfriend/girlfriend more than anything in the entire world and I would die for him/her, but I know that’d make him/her sad, so instead I’m gonna live for him/her.” 

72: “What can I say? I’m irresistible.” “And yet, here I am, resisting you.” 

73: “You don’t get into a relationship to mess around and cheat you get into a relationship to search for that one person you love more than yourself. And I know now that that’ll never be possible for you, because you’re incapable of loving anyone besides yourself.” 

74: “Give it up and she lives.” “You’re an idiot if you think she can’t take care of herself.” 

75: “Don’t tell me you're afraid.” “I was born afraid.” 

76: “Go ahead. Do what I can’t do.” 

77: “I don’t want to speak to you anymore.” 

78: “This is everything!” “No, he/she is everything.” “You’re going to give all of this up for him/her?” “Yes.” 

79: “”You wouldn’t understand. its a secret.” “I wouldn’t understand or it’s a secret?” “You wouldn��t understand (character), it’s a secret.” 

80: “Thinking I had the heart to care for you was your first mistake, followed by countless others.“ 

81: “I can’t figure out what you are.” “Excuse me?” “Good influence or bad.” 

82: “I’m scared of sex, but not because I think it’s going to hurt, but because I’m uncomfortable with my body and I’ve never been naked in front of anyone before.” 

83: “Does he/she really think of her/him as just a friend?” “No, he/she’s in love with him/her, he/she just won’t admit it.” 

84: “All I ever really wanted was for him/her to love me.” 

85: “Nothing is going according to plan!” “That depends.” “On what?” “who’s plan you’re talking about.” 

86: “You intrigue me.” “I’m not very interesting.” “Funny, uninteresting people don’t usually have to say that.” 

87: “Why is he bleeding?” “Because he’s an idiot.” “I didn’t know idiocy cause people to start spontaneously bleeding from a gash in their (body part).” 

88: “That is a terribly, horribly, incredibly stupid idea. Let’s do it and see what happens.” 

89: “He/she’s an idiot, I’m an idiot. We’re co-presidents of the Club Idiot.” “Don’t you mean the Idiot Club?” “Exactly.” 

90: “He/she’s crying. What do I do?“ “Go comfort him/her.” “How?“ “Start with hugs.“ “With what?“ 

91: “You know you’re in love with her, right?” “Since when?” “Since pretty much always. That’s why I’m breaking up with you.” 

92: “Will you hit him over the head with a frying pan?” “I believe the technical term for that is ‘will you murder him’.” “Fine, then. Will you murder him for me?” 

93: “I would like to join you in acknowledging the difficulties of your life.” “You’re the worst at this comforting thing.” 

94: “You don’t strike me as a professional criminal.” “That’s what makes me so good at it.” 

95: “Literally everything about that is illegal.”  

96: “Why are you doing that?” “Doing what?” “Treating me like a person.” “Because you... are one...?” 

97: “My mascara is too expensive to ruin by crying, but just know I am feeling a lot of things on the inside.” 

98: “Did you bring us here to die?” “Obviously.” “I can’t tell if you’re being sarcastic or not.” 

99: “Are you clinically insane or incredibly annoying?” “I don’t know. Probably both.” 

100: “That’s not funny.“ “I thought it was.“ “You don‘t count. You stared laughing in the middle of a funeral because you started thinking of a meme you saw.”