#have it. its far from finished but whatever. happy valentines day

[spengsart]

everythin’s bigger in texas

[kaeyx]

Valentine's day special - Nakahara Chuuya

Word count: 3.6k

Warnings: yandere!Chuuya, kidnapping, afab!gn!reader, smut, voyeurism technically?, drugging at the beginning

Notes: happy valentine's day! This is neither edited nor proofread

You sigh and drag a hand down your face, yawning. Another day, another fiscal quarter, another load of budgets you had to go over and compile.

You allow yourself a moment to fantasize, since the box has no note or signature. If only it was from Chuuya, the most gorgeous man in all the Port Mafia. But oh, he'd never notice someone as unimportant as you! He probably didn't even know you exist! Him, the strong and powerful mafia executive and you, some poor sod who made sure everything ran smoothly, it was forbidden! He was just too out of your league..... dejected sigh.

Right, more like he's busy doing actually important things. He knows you exist, you sort of work under him. He's the one that goes through all your reports and comes back with budgets, so you know if you can order more paperclips and radios. And ammunition. And other things. He's just too busy being stupidly gorgeous and doing Important Executive Things to send valentine's day gifts to everyone who works under him.

With a sigh you set your papers down and sink into the chair, grabbing the box. A break wouldn't hurt. You don't recognise the brand, but there's a helpful little chart with the contents of each chocolate on the inside of the lid. Your thoughts drift back to Chuuya, as they often do. You can hope, right? After all, sending a bunch of gifts is exactly the kind of sweet thing he'd do. You've heard that he knows the name of everyone who works for him, and you're inclined to believe it.

Oh damn, these things are good. You pop a second piece into your mouth as soon as you swallow the first, feeling the taste spread across your tongue and burn your throat with its sweetness. Chuuya, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear while he writes. Chuuya, calling you by name whenever you see him. Chuuya, looking cocky and fiery and self satisfied after a job well done. Fuck, you really need to reign yourself in. This is reaching high school crush levels of infatuation, not that anyone can blame you.

Okay, okay, enough moping around, you're going to finish the whole box if you keep this up. Making a mental note to ask Kouyou about the gift later, you close the box and set it aside. Only, your hands feel a little heavy. You yawn, tiredness gathering fast behind your eyes. Shit, you know you hadn't slept well but surely it wasn't this bad? You don't want to take a nap right now.

Another yawn overtakes you and you lean back in your chair, rubbing your forehead. Okay, this never ends well, but you'll just take a 15 minute nap. Or an hour nap. Whatever. It's not like you have to clock out, as long as everything is in order by the deadline you can sleep as much as you want. You'll just.... rest your eyes a little.

✦✦✦

.....This isn't your office. This isn't even an office, it's a bedroom. You're still in your clothes, and your mouth feels pasty. The first thing you notice is the chocolates from before are sitting next to the bed, which is weird because you didn't bring them. The sunlight falling across your face is at a much lower angle than you remember. Your head is pounding terribly, but you're awake enough to realise you don't recognise the room at all. In fact, you don't even recognise the view beyond the gorgeous, floor to ceiling windows. It's a completely different part of Yokohama and, judging by how high up it is, far outside your budget.

The door opens with a smooth click and you turn to look. There's a sharp pulse of pain from your head and you close your eyes with a groan, hearing hurried footsteps coming up to the bedside.

"Are you okay?"

That snaps you out of it. It's Chuuya's voice. And indeed when you look, it's Chuuya's face close to your own, looking at you with concern. Your heart flutters and heat stirs in your gut as several realisations slam into you. Oh god, this is his house. Probably his bed. Had he been the one to find you? Had he carried you all the way here from headquarters?

"..... I'm fine. My head hurts," you answer quickly, realising you've been staring like an idiot.

"Figures," he sighs, running a hand through his hair. You notice he's missing his hat. You feel like you're seeing something you shouldn't. "I ordered those chocolates made pretty strong."

Hang on, what? "What? Those were from you?"

Your heart soars. Holy fuck he'd sent you chocolates on valentine's, and you're lying in his bed. But....

"You had them made pretty strong?"

Chuuya nods, looking a little awkward. "I had to get you here without a fuss, you understand. And I needed time to prepare for when you came."

You blink several times, head still spinning. This makes absolutely no sense.

"I just can't leave you alone out there, it's not safe. You have no idea what risks you take on the daily just working for me, doll. I couldn't bear it any longer, you're too special to lose." He's almost rambling now.

"And you didn't even ask first?" You interrupt him. He pauses, looks back at you with a delicate sort of expression on his face.

"I couldn't have you saying no. Or getting any ideas about leaving."

"But.... but what about my job? My apartment?"

Chuuya reaches a hand out and tentatively rests it on top of yours. It's effective in shutting you up, mostly because the touch makes you lose your train of thought. He's so warm, it's even radiating through the smooth leather of his gloves.

"I've taken care of everything. You don't have to worry about that anymore, okay? I can take care of both of us." He talks so gently, squeezing your hand gently when you don't lean away from him. A little bit like he's soothing a scared animal. That thought shouldn't intrigue you as much as it does.

You stare at him in silence, your sluggish brain trying to process everything through the fog of sleep and drugs. Which is also his fault, you realise. Chuuya is simply kneeling in silence next to the bed, fixing you with a steady gaze, and you can't tell what he's thinking. He seems to be holding his breath.

"You... just want me to stay with you?" You ask him, tentatively.

"You are going to stay with me, darling."

The pet name startles you in the best of ways and a traitorous shiver of heat curls up your spine. Damn, you knew you were desperate but this is just pathetic. You need space, fast.

"Go. Just leave, please. I need to think." If he keeps looking at you like that, so strangely hopeful, while kneeling, you're going to do something you might regret. And you still don't know how you want to feel about this.

You close your eyes and don't open them again until you hear the door click shut, not wanting to risk a look at his expression. There's also the sound of the lock, and the soft tumbling sounds of a deadbolt. You slump backwards onto the ridiculously plush pillows.

Is it bad that you're not angry? Maybe it's the novelty of the situation, or the shock. But, wow. That was intense. Are you really dense enough to miss all those signs, or is Chuuya just really good at acting normal? You know he's not lying. This is undoubtedly unhealthy, but you don't think you want to complain.

Warmth blooms in your chest and you get a little giddy. Is this a fucked up airport romance novel or what? The rich, handsome mafia boss has been secretly pining after you all this time too, even though you're a nobody, and he just can't wait to marry you! Okay, Chuuya isn't the boss and he hasn't said anything about marrying you, but he's gorgeous and he kidnapped you so it's close enough. It almost seems too good to be true. You get to stay in his house and quit your job, presumably to sit around and look pretty since he hasn't mentioned you having chores, and in exchange.... what? He wants to fuck you, like a sugar daddy of sorts? God, you can only hope.

This is so much to process, especially after you've apparently been drugged. You have to talk it out with him obviously, but not now. Later. When you wake up from this next nap you're going to take right now, snuggled up in sheets with a stupidly high thread count that smell like Chuuya.

✦✦✦

Unfortunately, Chuuya seems to have interpreted your initial reaction as a definitive rejection. And even though your situation isn't ideal, mostly because you can't leave, it's not like you have any other complaints. This has lead to easily the most ridiculous month of your life.

You'd had a short, hard think after your second nap of the day, that first day, and decided that this was an absolutely glorious situation to be in. The next time Chuuya had unlocked your door, bringing you food, you'd tried to talk to him about it.

Much to your confusion he'd just looked.... a little heartbroken. Like he didn't believe you at all. And now you want to punch yourself for letting him believe that, because Chuuya is horrifically stubborn and seems convinced you're lying to him to get out.

Sitting in bed, you ponder the absurdity of the situation. Chuuya is out for work, though he always makes a point to come home for at least one meal of the day. After the first week and a lot of begging he'd let you eat with him and also have free reign of the house when he was there, just so you weren't confined to what you now know to be the guest room. He doesn't let you have a phone or an internet connection for obvious reasons, but you have all the TV and books you could ever want, and a record player. Chuuya's taste in music was... more punk than you'd anticipated, but he seems perfectly happy to answer questions about each record when you ask.

So you ask questions, eat with him, ask about his day, you've even tried cleaning up a little while he's home and you're allowed out of the room! You're on your best behaviour to try and get him to touch you, to look at you even, but he just sighs like a kicked puppy and locks you back in the bedroom whenever he has to leave. He won't even give you a hello or goodbye kiss, and it's starting to sour your ideal of a domestic life. You'd be lying if you said it hadn't been an idle fantasy before, but now that it was both within reach and more unattainable than ever you feel like you're going crazy. What the fuck else are you supposed to do?

Flopping backwards onto the sheets, your eyes drift to the corner of your room. There, on the wall mounted lamp by the desk. He's got a camera. An idea begins to form in your mind. It's not like Chuuya had tried to hide the surveillance from you when you'd asked. To keep an eye on you, he'd said, to keep you safe. You know it's because he doesn't trust you to stay without trying to jump out the window or something equally stupid. You know he's got the system hooked up to his phone, that it's a live feed, and that he checks it sometimes. A grin spreads across your face, and you pray silently that he's bored at work.

It doesn't take long to set everything up. A hand towel from the ensuite bathroom, because of course Chuuya is fancy enough that his guest bedroom has an ensuite. A pillow, set on its side and placed in the middle of the bed. You, naked from the waist down except for underwear, straddling it with the towel on top to minimise mess. You'd had to estimate your position relative to the shot since you've never actually seen the camera's view, but it's a good enough job.

Straddling the pillow and bracing yourself on your hands, you close your eyes. Time for a show. You think of him. The soft, copper curls of hair, those gorgeous blue-grey eyes, and how he's taken you. He wants you, he has to want you. Out of everyone he could have he took you, kept you without asking. Like you were his already, like he owns you. Nothing gets you riled up faster than that.

Warmth settles low in your gut and you sigh. No, it's not time to move yet. You hope he's watching. What would that look like? Phone in hand, just taking a quick peek to check on you only to be met with this. You can imagine Chuuya's eyes widening in shock, maybe glancing quickly around him to make sure nobody else can see this. His hands, his gorgeous hands with their long, lithe fingers, squeezing tighter as he zeroes in on you.

Your hands sneak under your shirt, slowly, teasingly. They dance across your stomach before going up, up your chest, quickly pulling the fabric over your head. You're entirely exposed now, the sunlight streaming in through the windows and hitting your skin, lighting you up from behind in the camera's point of view. What if it saves the recordings? Will Chuuya watch the footage back? You hope so. You imagine him looking at the video over and over again while he palms his cock, maybe even at work, and the thought only makes the heat in your belly grow.

Grasping the pillow with one hand you brace yourself with the other, and roll your hips experimentally. A pleasant tingle of stimulation, dampened by your underwear being in the way, just how you wanted it. Your eyes slide shut again as you find a comfortable pace, head bowed. What would he look like while masturbating? His thick hair all messed up as his chest heaves, shirt undone and pants shoved down to his knees. His pants and grunts as his hand moves faster and faster and slick sounds fill the air. Has Chuuya ever thought about you, like you've thought about him? Like you're thinking about him right now?

Your face screws up a little and you whine, a bit louder than necessary. If the camera has a microphone, you want to make sure it catches every sound you make. A low groan reverberates in your chest next and you make no attempt to stop it, your movements speeding up a little as your cunt dampens. The friction is so light and teasing no matter how hard you grind down onto the pillow, it's already beginning to frustrate you.

With a little tug the pillow's seam slots itself perfectly against your clothed slit and you can hear your heavy breaths in your own ears.

"Chuuya...." You moan, quietly, wantonly.

He has to sound so much prettier than you, with that sweet voice that grows rough around the edges when he's excited or annoyed. You imagine his breathless panting and whining in your ear, his voice almost a growl while he fucks you, his hands gripping you like a bear trap. Oh fuck, you want him inside of you so badly. It's been too long, too much of having him right fucking there without being able to touch him. All you want is to reach into his pants, to feel his cock twitch and stiffen under your fingers. Does he like it rough, fast paced? Or slow and romantic? You can't decide, and you don't care. However he decides to take you, you'll go gladly. All you want is to fall apart on his fingers and tongue and cock, over and over again, enough to make up for lost time.

His tongue dancing over your clit, dipping in between your folds, oh how you need that. The pillow isn't enough, you're working yourself into a frenzy trying to get satisfaction from the teasing rubs, every pass of your hips making you lose your mind. You can barely think, except for fragmented fantasies about Chuuya. How you wish it was him below you right now, sucking on your clit and holding you down against his face. Your hands buried in that soft, silky hair of his as you rode out your orgasms. His moans vibrating against your cunt while he sucked and licked and fucked you on his tongue until you cried, and then not stopping until you collapsed over him in a sweaty mess. His already beautiful face stained with your slick even as he licked his lips clean and leaned in to kiss you.

Your head falls back with a cry of his name, all shame abandoning you. Quickly pulling one leg over the pillow you yank your underwear off, not even stopping to look at the pearly string of wetness that connects your soaked cunt to the fabric, tossing them onto the bed behind you and resuming your movements.

The change makes your knees weak and you whimper Chuuya's name again, almost automatically. The rough fabric of the towel feels divine, dragging across your clit over and over and almost burning with a raw ache. You pin the pillow with your legs too free up a hand and use it to pull back the hood, exposing the swollen nub. Your slick quickly leaves a wet patch on the once pristine fabric and the rough texture disappears slightly, leaving you both under and overstimulated.

Damnit, this isn't going to be enough to cum. You want to cum, you want Chuuya to be watching, you want him to break down the door and- and- something, anything. Push your face down and pull your hips into the air, spreading your ass to admire the mess you've made all for him. Lick a greedy stripe up your cunt to taste you before he bottoms out in one thrust, you're wet enough, you can take the sting. Fuck, the pain would feel so good if it came from him. The fast, unforgiving pace as he fucks you into the mattress, putting that insane stamina of his to good use until you're a braindead mess.

"H- Hah- fuck." Your voice shakes, you remember you're supposed to be making noise. "Chuuya, please, please.... Chuuya..." Your head thrown back, back arched, hips grinding mindlessly into the pillow as you beg, you're hopefully the picture of desperation and seduction. God, you need him to come home now.

The knot in your stomach tightens little by little and you concentrate on it, feeling your orgasm grow even as your legs begin to tremble from exertion. There's a sheen of sweat on your bare chest and your knees are beginning to hurt from bearing your weight, but you're so close. Just a little bit more, just-

"Fuck, I knew you'd come around. See? You're safe here, you're mine now."

The voice comes out of nowhere, scaring you so badly you yelp and lose concentration. Your orgasm, so tantalisingly close, slips through your fingers as you whine and look around.

It's two way, of course. Why hadn't you thought of that? The camera, it has a speaker on your end too. Chuuya is talking to you through the camera. Arousal spears through your gut and you turn your head towards where you know the device is, putting on a shaky smile.

"Are you- convinced now?" You pant. Your thighs are burning, badly. Still, your hips start moving again of their own accord.

"Absolutely I am, sweetheart." Oh, that nickname goes straight to your pussy, especially with the ragged, almost desperate tone in his voice.

"Chuuya," you moan shamelessly, "I miss you so bad... Want you to be here, I need you..."

"I'm coming doll, I'll be home soon." His voice crackles a little, but it's still recognisable. "You're the prettiest damn thing I've ever seen, don't stop moving okay? Put on a show for me."

You grin, once again curling over the pillow between your legs and focusing on your movements. It's not hard to find the edge again, you're already so riled up and his words are adding to the fire pooling in your guts.

"Keep talking- fuck, just keep taking to me," you beg.

"You like my voice, baby?" Chuuya sounds so self satisfied, you can picture the smug look on his face as clearly as if he was right in front of you. "You like it when I talk to you? Thought about my voice before?"

You nod frantically, stomach flexing. Just a little more, just a few more seconds...

"Gonna cum?" Chuuya's voice comes out a little breathless, almost awed. "Cum all over yourself just from humping your pillow and listening to me? Not even going to touch yourself, darling? Fuck, do it. I wanna see. Go on, cum for me."

That's all it takes, really. With a noise between a yell and a sob you reach your peak, cunt clenching around nothing while you ride out the high. Dimly you hear Chuuya's voice, rough and satisfied, praising you. You fall onto your face, landing in a sort of all fours position that keeps your back arched and ass in the air. Your poor, oversensitive clit has been rubbed raw against the towel and is still twitching, you must be a sight to see.

You turn your head to the side, looking in the general direction of the camera with a dazed smile.

"'M waiting for you, Chuu."

"I'm coming, doll."

[ironverseocs]

OC Valentine's Challenge 2024 -> Day 1: First Love

(Read on AO3)

Melissa scrambled up the limbs, hand over hand, feet scraping bark off where they struck and kicked off against the organism. She laughed as she chased Jackson higher up.

“Race ya to the top!” he said, unnecessarily so since he was already a yard from the last bough with two yards between him and Melissa.

“Says you with the head start,” Melissa sneered playfully. Nonetheless, she eagerly spurred on the pace.

Once she reached the last stable bough – something sturdy enough to support her weight to sit on –, she seated herself with her legs hanging off one side and her left hand wrapping around the top of the trunk for support. Jackson mirrored her on the opposite side. She could see half his face through the needles of the pine.

“So, what is it you wanted to give me?” she asked.

Jackson just smiled, a little bit sly, a little bit coy.

Melissa frowned.

“Don’t tell me it’s just this. Like, the view or whatever,” she said, finishing in thought, because that would be lame.

“It’s not.”

She waited for him to continue, to say what it was, but he held silent another moment longer.

“So?” she drew out. “What goes, Jack?”

Jackson sucked in his lips, pressing his mouth into a line. Suddenly, it was like all his glee had vanished and only his giddiness remained. He stared at her a second longer, then ripped his gaze away to stare at the ground below, a sizable drop below. Was that… sheepishness she was seeing? Why would he be scared? They had hung out all Summer since the moment he moved to her neighbourhood. They went to the movies together, biked to the far side of town, stayed up late into the night playing video games under the same roof or apart and online, speaking through headsets, trying to keep their voices low so they don’t wake up the whole of their households. His eyes drifted to a pocket on his cargo shorts before glancing behind him.

Melissa’s brows knit harder into one another.

He shoved his hand into the pocket and pulled out a parcel—brown paper wrapping with a red string tying off.

“Happy birthday,” he said quietly—in a tone that blew away all thought from the girl’s mind—and pressed his hand forward.

It was all Melissa could do to stare at it.

“For you,” he urged.

“Right. Duh,” she parried back and caught him in a glance before she took the parcel into her own hands. She flipped it over, studied the way the knot in the string was made and the tape was laid perfectly parallel with the edges of the paper. She looked at Jackson again.

There was a lump suddenly in her throat. “What is it?”

“Are you forgetting how gift giving works? You’re supposed to unwrap it and find out!”

Melissa holds back her sheepishness and peels the tape off with her fingertips. The package is irregularly shaped, cylindrical but squat, about one inch deep and three in diameter. It’s heavy, making Melissa guess it to be made of metal. She finishes peeling off the last of the tape, unraveled the paper, and revealed —

Her eyes flash wide and round; glittering bronze, polished glass, a shifting stick half red, half white with letters inscribed around the outside. White on black. Despite its now polished nature, she can tell it used to be old. An antique.

“Jackson, I — how much—” Breath catches in her throat. “This must have cost…” She doesn’t know exactly, but the gist…? “A lot. What made you– why– ?”

He shrugs. “I knew you’d like it. And…” He looks away, his cheeks tingeing with pink. “I like you.”

It’s Melissa’s turn to turn pink, from the tips of her ears to the bridge of her nose. Butterflies begin to flutter in her stomach, preparing for a liftoff. He likes me? she repeats internally, trying to comprehend what that actually means. She blinks, trying to make sense of it, and then it hits her: Yeah, right, he likes her; they’re friends. Why would he hang out with her if he didn’t like her?

But then, why would he have to say something like that, if both of us already know it’s true?

“Sure,” she says simply, cautiously, “like, as a friend, right?” Melissa studies the antique compass resting in her palm while in wait for a response. While probing the space for clarity, she cannot look at him. She cannot give him more than her carefully chosen words. She cannot take this too fast— assume too much, and fall flat on her face as a result.

“No, like…”

Jackson’s hand is suddenly on her wrist, gentle yet alluring, and the gesture tugs at her mind enough that she allows her curiosity to take over. She shifts eyes to the corners, lifts her chin a fraction… he takes his hand away, now that he’s got her attention, and smiles—a small smile not like the one before slightly sly but innocent and pure like stars in a midnight sky.

“Like this.” He leans forward, over the tops of the pine branches, and presses a kiss to her cheek. Before she can react, he pulls back, suddenly flushed with colour, gaze sheepishly casting down. But then, he realises, and his posture springs up; he looks alarmed. “I’m sorry. That was probably too much. I think I—”

“No,” Melissa states firmly, and her confidence shocks the both of them. “Why ‘sorry’?” And then she laughs. She can’t help it. The lost puppy look on his face makes it all ten times better. She should stop— she should sober up and ease his worries, but she can’t, for all she’s feeling is one hundred percent glee. “No no, you can’t be sorry,” she starts again. “Because if you’re sorry, I can’t do this.”

As best she can, Melissa twists on the branch she’s sitting on so she’s facing him, closes her fist around the compass (to tuck it into her coat pocket), and then reaches herself forward to catch him on the lips.

It’s a quick peck. Like his was to her cheek. But Melissa hopes it conveys all the sentiment she is unable to express into words. For things like this, words barely do the feelings justice. A simple ‘thank you’ does not express the warmth behind her sternum, filling up her ribcage.

When she pulls back…

“I like you, too,” she says. “So, there.”

Jackson’s smile is slow to grow across his face, but he says back to her, “There.”

“Thank you,” Melissa presses, “times a million, for the present. I can’t believe that you’d… How did you afford it?”

“Told my dad I wanted it, then gave it to you.”

Just like that? If she were in another state of mind (not a young love-spun one), she’d marvel at how easy he made that sound, how Jackson had spoken of his deed like it was easier than a breeze. Like using his parent to give him something that he wasn’t even going to keep… and then giving it to her… the awe of it wrapped around Melissa’s mind and would not let go.

“Well, tell you dad thanks for spending the money,” she jokes.

He smiles.

"But,—" more sincere, "thank you for getting it in the first place."

They’re back to their usual dynamic, it seems, but with one very significant change:

Now, they hold each other’s hands.

–

forever taglist -> @ocappreciation @ochub @arrthurpendragon @foxesandmagic @shrinkthisviolet @themaradwrites @goldheartedchaoticdisaster | dm me or send an ask if you'd like to be added :)

[galacticturtlefromwildspace]

So THIS is Tumblr...

My grandmother always told me I should keep a diary. My mom did too.

If you look around the house, you're sure to find various notebooks with one or two or ten pages filled out detailing whatever thoughts were going through my ten or thirteen or fifteen-year-old brain. But all attempts were short-lived. I didn't really see the point of it. I got distracted. I was more interested in writing about imaginary worlds where all my feelings would materialize into conflicts that would leave land scorched for as far as the eye could see, that would topple empires, that would lead to great discoveries, that would let me rest my head in a garden that only existed inside of it.

But I haven't been a teenager for a while. As I've grown older and more sentimental and keep ending up in places and situations where everyone else is asking, "Why aren't you writing this down?" I've been tempted to give in. I've told myself that maybe it could be therapeutic. It's my last year as a twenty-something and, at the moment, it's looking like it's going to be just as if not more eventful than a lot of the things leading up to this point.

So I thought of Tumblr. I avoided this place from its inception through high school and college. Then I mostly forgot about it. However, when contemplating the concept of airing my thoughts into the digital void, I remembered this place that had caused such a stir among my peers who were eyeball deep in emo bands, vampires, and anime.

Alas, here I am. I suppose I should get to it.

January 14th, 2023. You can call me Turtle. I'm a Tour Manager. Think of any live show you've ever seen or wanted to see. Did you manage to grab those Taylor Swift tickets? Ever fancied seeing Hamilton? This past holiday season, did you make it out to see The Nutcracker? You ever see those late night talk shows that always bring on a musical guest? Did you get excited about that Coachella lineup announcement?

I'm the type of person who makes sure everyone and everything gets to where it needs to be when it needs to be on time and within budget so the show can happen. My stuff is in Philadelphia but I live wherever work takes me dragging along a backpack and a carry-on sized suitcase because it's bothersome being weighed down by your own belongings.

Everyone wants to hear the crazy stories and every year I save a few that are Christmas dinner table friendly. Because it is true that one thing I don't have to deal with is monotony. Dull days are few and far between to the extent that I welcome them with open arms. Everything is loud and fast-paced and emotional and relentless, controlled chaos from start to finish. Is it romantic or is it hell? I can't say. But I do know that if you'd be happy doing anything else, odds are you won't stick around for long. I don't say that part to people very often.

For whatever reason, I've been doing this now for ten years which is... insane for me to think about.

In five days I ship off to do it all again, a short run around America and Canada. I'll be back just after sunrise on Valentine's Day assuming I'm not trapped in Vancouver by an armageddon snowstorm like I was leading up to Christmas.

What am I feeling? Cautiously optimistic. It's not a complicated show and I'm going out with a lot of experienced - if not opinionated - people. This will be the easiest gig I have all year. Nonetheless, I'm thinking about all the things that could go wrong because if I didn't, I wouldn't be doing my job. The thing about touring is that something (or many somethings) will always go wrong so putting in the work in advance to preemptively circumvent the little fires so that I'll only have to worry about the big ones is a vital process.

Simultaneously, I'm still tying up the odds and ends from two tours I had at the end of 2022... mountains of receipts and such. I'm also prepping for my next tour in March and am already being copied on email threads between booking agents trying to piece together a world tour I have this fall. That is honestly the thing I'm most worried about in the back of my mind.

You see, I've never actually fully done a world tour before. I've only ever been to North and South America. This one will be throwing Europe, Asia, and Australia into the mix. While this opportunity feels well earned, the downside of becoming a tour manager at twenty-two is that when it comes to new opportunities, you're always the one in charge which means any mistake you make is going to be quite public and spectacular which is another reason why I'm always so anxiously thorough. Luckily, the anxious part isn't very obvious to most people.

Leaving home always tugs at me a little bit. It's less about the onset of homesickness and more about stepping into another unknown. Home is stable, consistent, and reliable. But the second I walk into that first airport it's like starting at level one of a whole new game.

I take a deep breath and look straight ahead knowing this is the last moment of rest I'll have until I beat the game.

[midnightswithdearkatytspb]

Mob bucky/seb or mob chris/andy recs??

Updated 07/04/21 ✨ = Just Added

To be added please tag me in your future works!

Hey Anon! I’m so glad you asked this because Mob/Mafia! Any version of those boys is my favorite. In my previous fic recs I recommended...

If love was an option by @mianorth » Bucky Barnes x Reader — Part 1 🦋 Part 2 🦋 Part 3

Good Little Wife & Good Little Girl by @donutloverxo » Mob!Andy Barber x Reader – A little dark and it has some really good smut in it.

Blackmail by @stargazingfangirl18 » Soft!DarkMafia Andy Barber x Female Reader — You were just doing it to protect your family, at least that’s what you kept telling yourself, especially once you started to like it. (One-Shot)

Blow Sweet and Thick by @angrythingstarlight » Mafia!Bucky x Reader — Bucky is having a bad day, you can help him feel good. (Part of Mafia Monday’s)

Run To You by @bestofbucky » Mob!Boss Bucky x Reader — Mob boss Bucky Barnes hires you to be his bodyguard. (Series)

Can’t Run, Can’t Hide by @angrythingstarlight » Dark!MafiaBucky Barnes x Reader — When you get noticed by the infamous mob boss, you flee. But Bucky doesn’t like to be denied anything and he’s coming for you. (One-shot)

Six Feet | Ch.1 ⚰️ Ch.2 by @queenoftheworldisdead » Dark Mob!Steve x Reader + Dark Mob!Bucky x Reader — Your family’s small funeral home comes into financial trouble. In desperation your father finds the most unlikely solution to solve his financial problems. | (Short Series)

Bankrupt by @mypoisonedvine » dark!40’s!Mob!Stucky x Reader — Your husband’s gambling addiction quickly got him in hot water with the mob, and you by extension. When some debt collectors come by to settle what is owed, you realize that you have a lot more to worry about than money problems.

Partition by @angrythingstarlight » Mob!Bucky Barnes x Reader — Bucky comforts you after a bad day, and your boss learns why no one messes with his girl. —> Part 2: Let Me Show You — You wanted to know what your mobster boyfriend did, lucky for you he’s more into the show then tell.

Say the word and it’s yours by @angrythingstarlight » Mafia!Bucky Barnes x Reader — Your mobster boyfriend rescues you from a long, boring day at work. Bucky always said, “ask and its yours”

Lost Without You by @angrythingstarlight » Mafia!Bucky Barnes x Reader — Bucky Barnes would be lost with you. You’re his everything and he plans on spending Valentine’s Day proving it to you.

All Dressed In White by @angrythingstarlight » Dark!Mafia Bucky Barnes x Reader — You were going to marry someone else, Bucky won’t let that happen. You belong to him now and forever. Till Death Do You Part.

Thick As Thieves by @angrythingstarlight » Mafia!Bucky Barnes x Reader x Mafia!Steve Rogers — The only thing the Mafia hates as much as snitches are thieves. And you’re planning on stealing from Bucky and Steve, what happens if you get caught?

Won’t Let You Go by @kind-of-crazy-butthatsokay » Mob!Bucky Barnes x OFC!Kori — Kori met Bucky in one of his clubs, out to get shit-faced with a couple of friends to forget about her worries and maybe take home a guy to further rid herself of her numerous frustrations. Little did she know that the one-night stand with Bucky would turn into so much more than that.

Tell Me What You Want by @angrythingstarlight » Mafia!Steve Rogers x Reader; Mafia!Bucky Barnes x Reader — Your mob boyfriend, is none other than Steve Rogers and he is willing to get you whatever you wanted, all you have to do is ask. And be careful what you ask for because he’s going to give it to you over and over again.

To Have & To Hold by @slyyywriting » Bucky Barnes x Mob Boss!Reader — Bucky is trying his best to provide and care for his daughter who just entered first grade. Everything was alright until she asks why everyone else seems to have a mom except for her. You’re just a plain mob boss who wants to turn a new leaf. Challenges arise when the world refuses to let you take a softer, non-violent route. A little girl helps you navigate a compromise.(series)

✨ Mob!Sugar Daddy!Stucky Moodboard by @brattycherubwrites » Mob!Stucky x Reader

✨ Laced Around Your Throat by @angrythingstarlight » Mafia!Steve x Reader, Mafia!Bucky x Reader — Your Mob boyfriend knows that the only thing that looks even better than his hand around your throat is his custom made necklace. You’re his girl and the world needs to know it.

✨ Hidden Gems by @jtargaryen18 » Mob!Steve Rogers x Mob!Daughter Reader — Your father is the head of one of the most powerful crime families in Boston but he’s protected you from that life. In your quiet home outside the city, you’ve been cared for and protected. When the desires of a more powerful man with the will to dominate bursts into your life, all your illusions are shattered as he comes to claim what is his.

Necessary Arrangements by @stargazingfangirl18 » Andy Barber x Fem!Reader, Ari Levinson x (Different) Fem! Reader ft. Ransom Drysdale » One of my favorite series, chapters are decent sized and the smut is so good!

Hugs My Love by @thatfuckingweirdo » Mobster!Bucky Barnes x Reader — You just really need a hug, and Bucky is the only one you want it from.

my old man is a tough man, but he got a soul as sweet as blood red jam by @cloudystevie » Mob Boss!Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader — steve gives you what you want… kind of.

Brooklyn Wars by @world-of-aus » Stucky x Reader

Petals and Bullets by @revengingbarnes » Mob!Bucky Barnes x Reader (One of my all time favorites series)

I would check out @sinner-as-saint’s Masterlist they have quite a few Mob!Bucky series and one-shots that I have loved in the past.

Special by @buckycuddlebuddy » Bucky Barnes x Reader — this one-shot is really hot.

Love, Honor, and Obey by @constantwriter85 » Bucky Barnes — This one is good and I need to catch up on.

Mafioso by @captain-barnes-writes » Bucky Barnes x Reader — Please do yourself a favor and read.

Lipstick and Crayons by @oneoftheprettynerds » Dark!Steve Rogers x Reader - In Progress

A really good DarkMob!Steve Drabble called Please Hurt Me by @gotnofucks *chefs kiss*

The Mobster’s Little Girl by @smutsonian » Steve Rogers x Reader

off to the races 🐻 off to the races 2 by @harryspet » Soft!Dark Steve Rogers x Reader

The Ignorant Beauty & the Beast by @mysterioh » Steve Rogers x Reader – With 21 parts sadly it hasn’t been updated in 8 months, it’s one of my favorite Mob!Steve Roger fics out there. *Thanks to @inactivewhore I found out this story was moved to AO3 and is now called where angels fear to tread it was last updated on 13/11/20*

What It Takes by @cherienymphe » Bucky Barnes x Reader — You left Bucky once you found out who he really is. The one thing you thought would guarantee your safety ends up sealing your fate.

Welcome Home by @punani » Chris Evans x Black!Reader — He’s been away for awhile, but he knows that his girl’s loyalty to him knows no bounds. Knows she’s been waiting for him after her adamancy in telling him there was no other option. It’s only right to make the reunion a memorable one. | So, so, so, so freaking good!

These are what I found on Tumblr that I plan on reading.

Handmaid by @extremelyblackandwhite » Sebastian Stan x ingenue!Reader — y/n works as a handmaid for the daughter of an influential mob leader who is promised to the new boss of the most powerful mob family in new york, sebastian.

AO3 Website Reccomendations

Satellite Heart » Stucky x Reader — You used to be Steve and Bucky's girl. Then they fucking left without saying goodbye. Little did they know, you were pregnant. But life went on. You raised your Talia to the best of your ability. But one day, everything goes to shit. Now your boys are back in your life. And they're not planning on leaving anytime soon.

Little Fox A/B/O Series » Soft!Dark Bucky Barnes x Soft!Dark Natasha Romanoff x OFC! & Peter Parker x Soft!Dark Tony Stark — So I can’t stress this enough you need to read the tags for this series and I kept getting confused as I read this story as to how old Violet Mason is. But this series takes you on a roller coaster, I like it, my cousin didn’t finish it, I need to catch up.

Pelmeni *finished* » Stucky x Reader — James Bucky Barnes has a good life, as a member of a powerful organized crime syndicate. His best friend Steve is a member too and his literal partner in crime. Bucky's got a problem though. You. His longtime love and secret girlfriend. Unfortunately, your father is his boss and has plans for you that involve normal life. Steve has a problem too. Steve wants in on your relationship and more than the semi-regular/occasional steamy threesomes. You don't have a problem, you're just busy with a big mob wedding coming up, which means a big celebration, that you're busy catering for.

Dying For This Love » Dark!Bucky x Reader — That was before. When you were Bucky’s girl. Now, you have a score to settle. That’s why you’re wearing Bucky’s favorite red satin dress, the one with the cuts that reach right up to the tops of your thighs, the tennis necklace he gifted you for your anniversary, and are fresh off of a mani/pedi and hair appointment. He’s going to regret the day he fucked with you. | This one is intense and a tad bit dark, but the smut is good.

off to the races » Steve Rogers x Reader — In which you call the kingpin your Daddy.

The Mobster’s Little Girl » Steve Rogers x Reader — what happens when the big bad mobster gets blackmailed by your father to marry you? (kind of fluffy kind of not. kinda dark kinda not.)

Brooklyn Sweethearts » Dark!Stucky x Reader — Bucky and Steve had always been meant to keep her safe and happy. As far as anyone else was concerned, that was their sole reason for being alive. Unfortunately, the things that kept her safe were not always the things that kept her happy. Lately, she was making it pretty damn hard for them to compromise. | Probably one of my all time favorite Mafia!Stucky stories I have ever read, just sadly it also hasn’t been updated in like 8 months and I keep hoping it will get updated.

Hot Doll » Skinny!MobBoss Steve Rogers x Reader — Steve Rogers is on the rise in the New York underground as you’re trying to keep your own place there. | Dark and good!

Doctor Doctor » Steve Rogers x PlusSize! Reader — (1940 Mobster AU!) You're a war widow down on her luck; and the King of Brooklyn, Steve Rogers, takes notice. | Another one of my favorites. A little bit dark as well.

The Widow » Dark!MobBoss x Reader — It’s the 1920s and everyone’s having a roaring time but you. | Trust me it’s just dark enough.

Those are just some on AO3, I would just go through Mafia AU tag and go to filter and click Avengers or Captain America.

[lukescaboose]

So Into You

Hello everyone and Happy Valentine’s Day! I’m so excited to put this out into the world I’ve been working on it for almost a a year and its my first fic in nearly two years. I really hope you guys love it as much as I do and thanks so much if you choose to read it. love you all xx

Summary: Lauren and Harry are best friends who love each other and they both know it but Lauren is too stubborn to admit it.

What’s in it: Sugar sweet best friends to lovers with a healthy bit of smut. Black ofc.

Word count: 24.8k

Spotify Playlist

She couldn’t stop watching him from across the crowded dinner table. She admired him, his charisma and charm, his ability to dazzle a room without trying. She’d always loved that about him, way before she’d realized that she was in love with him anyway. It was his striking personality that had drawn her to him in the first place. Though they had never been anything more than best friends, Lauren was adamant to always let him know how much she appreciated that about him. And as she watched now she couldn’t help the small grateful smile from spreading across her lips. She was lucky enough to experience him for who he was and not because of the fame he had accumulated. Harry was everything to her. He reminded her that there were good people in the world, willing to give the shirt off their backs if it got someone else ahead.

Harry’s eyes met hers from the other end of the table, he offered her a smile and a silly face. She chuckled and looked away, her fingers coiling around the stem of her wine glass. She didn’t know anyone else besides Harry at this dinner party, but she knew how important it was to him that she’d be there. So she made an effort to make small talk with his colleagues around her but was easily lost when the conversation moved towards Harry’s business as the topic. She never cared for the limelight or wealth, her work dealt with children and the smiles she created were well worth it to her. Harry had felt the same, though his life had led him down a different path. His business created affordable living for lower-income families and he was very successful, though that didn’t matter to him.

Their aspiration for creating a change was how he and Lauren met. A benefit concert that Harry had put together drew Lauren’s attention and she brought some of her mentees. While the girls participated in the activities she wandered about to each vendor and learned about more ways to help within her community. It was when Harry had approached her that she thought her heart would lurch from her throat. He was incredibly handsome, dressed in a cream suit with a baby blue button-up undone at his chest. They talked, connected over their professions, and agreed to meet over dinner. It was no more than a networking opportunity, Lauren knew that a donation from Harry would secure a safe living environment for the girls at her group home. But when they met over dinner the conversation was endless and they talked until the restaurant was about to close. Harry had promised to make a donation to her home in exchange for her number. He was wildly attracted to Lauren, her dedication to her craft made him feel safe. She was ambitious, never righteous, and knew just how important her work was to the kids. He’d donate all of his earnings to her if it meant he got to see her again. 

As much as Lauren was attracted to Harry she’d never mix business with her own personal life, she was very adamant about that. Harry didn’t feel the same way but settled for friends if it meant that she’d be in his life. So they’d meet up for drinks often and discuss the labors of their work life, but the more they’d see each other the easier it was to blur the lines between colleagues and friends. Soon enough they’d begun to go over each other’s places and share the intimate details of their lives. They enjoyed each other’s company, knew how many people in their line of work only cared about money. Harry and Lauren both used their heart in everything they accomplished. With Harry’s personality and refreshing outlook on life, it was easy for Lauren to fall into a friendship with Harry - so much so he became her favorite confidant. It was nice for Harry to find someone who wasn’t interested in piggybacking on the tails of his success. Lauren had shared the same vision he did, the reward was simply making a difference. Though if it were up to Harry, he’d put Laurens name on every deal he’d ever signed, at the end of every speech he’d ever delivered. She was very much just as part of his success as he was and he’d never be able to repay her. He couldn’t imagine where he’d be without her, probably wouldn’t have made it as far as he had. Lauren listened to every idea he’d ever had, adding her input to his three A.M. thoughts. Without her, he’d probably be the same twenty-two-year-old kid with a dream.  

The dinner ended with Harry thanking his team for helping him achieve his vision. He made sure to give special thanks to Lauren, which had her smiling sheepishly at her dinner plate. Though he did that often, it never failed to make her cower under the stare of his colleagues. Harry smiled brightly at her from the head of the table reassuring her that without her none of this would have been possible. The opening of a new recreational center was Lauren's idea and she had pushed Harry way past his comfort zone when she presented it to him. The project was their baby and to see it come to light was something neither of them took for granted. Although Lauren wanted none of the praise or acknowledgment, Harry could never pretend as if this was all his doing. 

Lauren watched as Harry greeted and thanked his colleagues for coming. She stayed back, wanting to be the last to speak with him. They were going out for celebratory drinks, Harry’s idea. As the final group made their way out of the restaurant, Harry engulfed Lauren in a hug. “Feels good huh?” He asked her, placing a small kiss to her temple. She pulled away from their embrace, grabbing his hand in hers with a nod. “Really spectacular, Harry.” She beamed up at him. “All thanks to you, love. Still can’t believe you shot down my idea of putting your name on the building.” He frowned. She shushed him with a laugh, pulling him towards the entrance. 

Harry made sure to order Lauren’s favorite drink as she found a table for them to sit at. He brought the drinks back to her, ignoring the frown etched on her lips because he paid. He slid in next to her in the rounded booth, pushing her drink towards her with a smile. “Cheers to another advancement in the community and for all of your brilliant ideas.” He extended his glass to hers. She rolled her eyes jokingly at him but clanked her glass against his anyway. Harry grabbed her hand that rested on the table, capturing her gaze with his own with a bout of sincerity. “Thank you, Lauren, seriously. I couldn’t have done this without you.”  His calloused thumb rubbed over the smooth skin of her hand and she smiled. “We make a good team.” She grinned. “You give me any more ideas and I’m putting you on the payroll.” He chuckled over the rim of his glass, earning himself another eye roll from Lauren. “M’just supporting your vision.” She reminded him, taking a sip from her beverage. “Our vision.” He corrected her swiftly.  She smiled at him then, his kindness something she never took for granted. It was one of the reasons she found herself so desperately falling for him. He made it so hard for her not to want him in the ways that she did. She moved her hand from his hold and brought it to toy with her hair. She’d worn it natural tonight, the curls retracting when she let the strand free. 

“Like your hair like tha’.” He remarks, eyes following the actions of her fingers. Her gaze follows his, the curl she’d previously been playing with in front of her eyes now.

 “Thank you, took a long time.” She sighs, pushing the curl from her vision. He laughs, finishing the contents of his glass.

 “I know, seen you on wash day plenty of times.” She chuckles, shaking her head. “S’my favorite though.” He finishes with a sigh. A compliment was never far from his lips when he was around Lauren. Most of the time he did it without realizing it, always wanting to share whatever was on his mind with her. Other times he complimented her just because he liked the way her eyes shifted after. He found it funny that she always acted as if she’s heard something that wasn’t meant for her. That only made him reassure her that he was in fact speaking to her. She was gorgeous and he’d always tell her, she deserved to hear it. Lauren’s palms always got sweaty whenever he did that. She had never felt so seen and acknowledged as she did when she was around Harry. He was always bragging about her, even if he was the only one to hear it. He’d always felt that things that were incredible needed to be celebrated - in this case, his “thing” was just a “who”. She smiles appreciatively, the melanin in her skin hiding the inevitable blush. He never failed to make her flush. 

“You’re too kind.” She laughs, finishing the contents of her drink. The remaining ice hits the glass audibly and she sighs, settling back into her seat.

 “Only to you.” Harry winks at her, fanning a fire inside her chest that only he could put out. When he leaves to grab them a refill Lauren lets out an audible breath. She always feels like she’s holding the air inside her lungs whenever she’s around Harry. His compliments and praise suffocate her to the point where she feels dizzy. And if this were the way she was to die she’d be more than okay with that. She had never felt this way in her entire life. Men and relationships came and went, but this one she felt everywhere. It was like he had cast a spell on her, consuming her thoughts with every waking word and she didn’t mind but always felt relieved when she came back to earth. He was just so charming, to the point where it was hard to focus on anything else but him. She knew it wasn’t only her that felt this way, Harry had a way about him that would captivate his company. He drew people in, that’s what he was good at, and for her, he’d never stop until she succumbed to his charm. 

“For you, angel.” He slid the glass towards her, making himself comfy by her side. She smiles and thanks him, expelling the air between her lips after she swallows. “How’re the girls?” He asks, the tension is thick between them but he had grown used to it by this point. It was always like this, tense but comfortable, exciting even. Harry always looked forward to the times where they could be alone and catch up, even if he spent the majority of the time thinking about how beautiful she was. Lauren wipes the condensation from her glass onto a napkin, her eyes gleaming as she thinks about the girls from her job. 

“They’re great.” She responds with a chuckle, “So wickedly smart those girls.” Her mind travels to her mentees and how they always kept her on her toes with their insightful questions. They were always changing Lauren’s perspective on things and sometimes she felt that they were teaching her more than she was teaching them. 

“That’s great. And everything with the home is okay?” He queried and she nods with a smile. 

“What about you, big shot? Any new news that I should know?” She shoves at his shoulder lightly, having read in the paper that he had opened a new development on the west side of town. He laughs lightheartedly, his hand reaching up to wipe over his mouth. 

“I’ve been quite busy.” He shrugs then places his arm over the back of the booth. Lauren finds it difficult not to fall into his side. Even though she desperately wants to and Harry hopes that she does.

 “I’d say.” She chuckles. She places her chin in her hand, turning her body towards Harry’s. He fights the urge to lean into her, always wanting to be closer than what she’d allow. “Proud of you.” She murmurs, brown eyes watching over his face. He smiles a dimpled smile at her and clinks his glass against hers as a thank you. 

It's quiet for a moment, the bar is more upscale with very few patrons and Harry is grateful. Though he knows better than to think anything different, he almost lets himself believe that they’re on a date. Every moment spent with her felt intimate, whether those were her intentions or not, and most times Harry didn’t mind playing pretend. “You know,” He drags out the words, catching Lauren’s attention and she fights the urge to roll her eyes. Whenever he started a sentence that way a new idea followed. 

“Why don’t you take a break for a while, H. Bask in the moment for a bit.” She sighs, gently placing her hand over his. Lauren had come to learn very quickly that Harry wasn’t very fond of rest. Unlike herself, he was always bouncing from one venture to the next. She always felt like she needed a month's rest after one big thing. Though they were polar opposites, they worked together and were always pulling each other out of their comfort zones.

 “I know, love. Which is exactly why I booked us a getaway.” He grinned, that stupid grin that always made Lauren’s insides quiver. She furrowed her eyebrows at him, the confusion setting in after the initial shock. Harry gripped her hand that was already on his, squeezing gently as he beamed at her. “Know you’ve got some time off and I know how hard it is for you to actually distance yourself from your work. So, I figured, why not get away so you can actually take care of yourself for a bit.” He shrugs sheepishly and she continues to stare at him in bewilderment. Finding it hard to believe that he had actually done something like this. Not that this was something he’d never do, getaways were always something he’d bring up. But each time, Lauren would shoot it down with the excuse of work. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to go, she didn’t trust herself to go. Now she had no excuse, no safety net to catch her when she was in this kind of predicament. The way he was looking at her with such hopeful eyes was enough for her to contemplate saying yes for a moment. 

“Please, Lau” He pleaded when she was quiet for a moment too long. “You know how much we both could use this and there’s no better time. I’m stepping away for a bit since this project is completed, and I’d love nothing more than to run away for a bit with you.” She couldn’t help but smile softly at his words, even in the midst of her panic. There was no excuse good enough that he would accept, and she had no real reason not to go. Harry knew her boundaries and always respected them, she had no reason to believe that anything would change when they went away.

“How long?” she raised an eyebrow at him and his smile grew, knowing she was cracking. 

“Five nights,” He felt giddy as his body leaned in towards hers. “Santa Monica, beach view, close to the pier.” 

“Hotel?” 

“Airbnb.”

Her smile grew larger as the excitement set in, just as Harry knew it would. She had mentioned one time, a feeble excuse to get out of a vacation, that hotels were just as strict as work. She hated the rigidness and that you could never make a hotel feel like home. She always felt like she was sharing her vacation with a hundred other strangers, the shared amenities alone were enough to make her stay as far away as possible.

 “Fine.” She grinned.

 “You’re gonna love it, I promise.” Harry went on to explain the intricate details of their trip. They would leave that upcoming weekend, all their expenses were paid for. And he was certainly not budging on that. “You wouldn’t even let me compensate you for the brilliant idea of a rec center, Lau. Let me do this for you, Lord knows you deserve it.” He sighed. He ran a hand through his hair exasperatedly, her stubbornness has always been something he could do without. He admired it at times, adored it others, but when it got in the way of him trying to express his appreciation for her, he hated it. She stuck her tongue out at him teasingly.

 “I’m paying you back whether you like it or not.” She huffed, pulling her hand away from his albeit reluctantly.

 “And I’ll match it and donate it to a foundation of your choosing, princess.” She crossed her arms over her chest like a child which only made Harry chuckle.

 “Thank you, but I hate you right now.” She pouts. 

Harry shrugs and nods his glass towards her, “You can hate me on the beach, darling.” 

***

“All packed, lovie?” His voice echoes through the receiver as her phone lays on her dresser. She huffed, loud enough that she knew he’d hear it, whilst shoving random items into her dusty suitcase. It took her forever just to find the old thing. Mostly reserved for trips back home - which were few and far between - it was shoved in the back of the hall closet. She had made a list loaded with essentials to bring, but she wished she had cuter outfits to bring. It was stupid and she knew it, but despite how many times she told herself she shouldn’t, she wanted to impress Harry. 

“Just about, wish I had some new things to wear. Meant to go shopping this week but got caught up at work every day.” She groaned, pulling a bikini from her bottom drawer. It was barely enough to be considered cute but it would have to do.

 “Can always go shopping when we get there.” His voice sounded further away now, she reckoned he’d put the phone down somewhere as she had.

 “And overpay ridiculously at some tourist shop? No thanks.” She chuckled, now going through her summer basket.

 “I’ll take you to the nearest Target as soon as we land, how’s tha’ sound?” She laughed loudly, wishing she could smack away the smirk that was adorning his features inevitably. 

 “Oh I’ll be holding you to that, can’t possibly bring all my hair products on the plane.” The thought of that made her slightly nauseous. She didn’t want to pay for products that she wouldn’t be able to bring back home, but it was a small price to pay for a free vacation. 

“Thought you had an appointment to get your hair braided today? S’that why I never got those pictures I asked for?” She could practically hear the pout in his voice, and it was moments like these that made it difficult to distinguish what their relationship really was. She was certain he had only meant that he wanted to see her hair because that is what any friend would want, but her mind allowed her to believe that he was genuinely interested. Which he was, but Lauren was too stubborn to see anything for what it truly was. 

“I was getting butterfly locs, doofus, had to cancel last minute though.” She sighed at another added stressor.

 “Can’t go tomorrow? Our flights not til 10:30 at night, love.” He was closer to the phone now, sat on the end of his bed, and thinking of any way to make things right for her. He didn’t want her to worry about her hair or anything else for that matter, which is exactly why when he booked the hair appointment he had also placed a deposit for the next day just in case anything should go wrong. 

“Probably not, she’s definitely booked by now.” Lauren didn’t want to dwell on it much, though she knew how much she wanted that hairstyle. She could never find the time to get it done and thought it was perfect for a vacation of any sort. 

“Give her a call tomorrow morning, bug. Doesn’t hurt to ask.” Harry tried to sound as nonchalant as possible, knew she’d flip her shit if she knew what he’d done. 

“I’ll have to pay extra, it’s not even worth it.”

 He rolled his eyes on his end, “About the same amount you’ll waste on hair products, I reckon. You want your hair done, go get it done.” He huffed, hoping that would do the trick, he had no other moves up his sleeve. She was quiet for a moment and he knew she was contemplating his suggestion. 

“Fine. I’ll call her, but I don’t want to be let down again.” She picked at the lint on her carpet as she bit her lip and Harry tried his best not to chuckle.

 “If it doesn’t work out I promise to help retwist your hair every night before bed, deal?” He smiled at nothing in particular, laying back against his duvet while thinking about just how soft her hair was. He even contemplated canceling the appointment just so he’d have the chance to be close to her. 

“You’re impossible.” She laughed. The thought of not calling at all crossed her mind for a moment before she pushed it away, telling herself she’d revisit his words later. 

They’d hung up the phone a bit later after Lauren promised to share the outcome of tomorrow morning. Harry was excited to revel in just how happy she’d be to look the way she wanted and he was happy he was able to do that for her. He’d do anything just to see her smile, the consequences he was sure to face for it were minuscule. 

***

Just as he knew he would, the next day at around 2 o’clock he received a call from an angry Lauren. He quickly switched the call to video just to see her pretty face and couldn’t keep the grin off his own. She looked more gorgeous than he ever thought imaginable - though he thought that whenever he saw her - it was hard to focus on the irate nature of her tone. Apparently, when Lauren went to pay, the hairdresser spilled the beans that an English gentleman had already footed the bill, and had left a pretty generous tip. Which left Lauren flushing and dodging questions from her regular stylist with empty promises to answer her inquiries later. She rushed from the salon to call Harry immediately, her skin on fire with anger and simultaneously, appreciation.

 “Well aren’t you a vision?” He interrupts her rant as soon as her camera connects which makes her stutter out a thank you in the midst of her rambling. 

“You’re racking up quite a bill here, Styles.” She huffs as she gets into her car, and Harry can’t keep his eyes off his screen. He was sure that this vacation was sure to put the nail in his coffin but he didn’t mind. He had it bad for her and would do it again and again.

 “S’ nothing if I get to see you smile.” He reminds her, rolling over in his covers. He was faintly aware of just how late in the day it was becoming but figured rest was best before a vacation where his thoughts and attention would solely be on her. He ignores the way she rolls her eyes, his eyes watching the golden charms wrapped around her hair. “Seriously though, your hair looks very nice.” He hums and watches as she bites her lip to avoid smiling. 

“How’d you know what hair to buy, anyway? You didn’t even know what they were called.” She pesters.

 “Oh, I have my ways, darling.” Truthfully he had asked for a detailed list from the hairstylist on where to go and what to buy. He insisted that he pay for her time but she told him he had already given her plenty, which didn’t stop him from tipping her slightly more than necessary. 

“You make it so hard to be mad at you.” She scowled. Harry followed with a deep laugh, only wiping the frown from Lauren’s face just as quickly as it had formed.

 “Because I don’t deserve for you to be mad at me!” He grinned widely at his phone, all consumed with her presence.

 “That’s for me to decide, Styles. I’m not talking to you for the whole flight, swear it.” She nodded in agreement with herself, which only made Harry laugh harder.

 “We both know I don’t need your response to talk your ear off, sweetheart.” And he was right, that was one of the things Lauren loved most about him, his rambling. She could be dead asleep and he’d talk just to hear his thoughts aloud and she truly did not mind. She couldn’t count the times she had fallen asleep to the sound of his voice whether it be over the phone or in person. In fact, she preferred succumbing to sleep that way. The slow forming words on rose-colored lips painted her dreams anyhow.

She’d made it the entire ride to the airport, the trek through security, and half of the wait for boarding without talking to him. A task that was easier said than done. He was purposefully bringing up topics he knew she loved to talk about, and reveled in the way her face would twist when she caught herself opening her mouth to respond. She was more than ready to give up the charade but knew his satisfaction was not something she wanted to hear about. So she persisted, busied herself with her emails, and ignored Harry’s remark about taking a break from work. 

“How long y’gonna torture me like this, love?” His hushed tone against her ear had her shifting nervously in the uncomfortable airport chair. “Reckon everyone around thinks I’m just some lonely lad.” A cold shudder ran down her spine at his proximity and the feeling of his breath against the shell of her ear.  She was frozen in her place for a moment, the tempest in her brain willing her to give in. She needed to stay strong, assert any type of willpower at this moment. She figured it was time to change the outcome of how these things usually go. He was pulling all his stops and normally this is where she’d cave. But Lauren wondered what would come next, although against her best interest. So she stuck to her guns. She slid further into her chair, crossing her legs to draw Harry’s attention, and continued to scroll. He huffed, his hair tickling her cheek as he dropped his head dramatically. 

“Fine.” He slouched into his own seat, grumpily looking down at his own phone. His obvious pout was visible from Lauren’s peripheral and she found it difficult not to stare at it. Her thoughts reminded her that she was only punishing herself. So he had done a nice thing, so what? When’s the last time that anyone had been so thoughtful? The man had made two appointments and picked out braiding hair. But that was precisely the problem. Those were the reasons why she was as mad as she was. Harry had once again made it harder for her to distinguish the nature of their relationship. Then she was reminded that the only reason Harry was being kept at arm’s length was because of her in the first place. This then brought up the impenetrable fact that the relationship that they had built was too special to damage with self-indulgences. So the indifferent look on her face remained for just a while longer. Until they were seated next to each other, closer than could possibly be comfortable, she hated airlines for that. Unbeknownst to her, Harry was tempted to buy the first-class seats but knew better not to. No matter how uncomfortable he was in the tiny seats of economy-class. 

“Can’t leave me lonely the whole trip, can you? I’m on my knees here, darling.” He pleaded, trying his best to meet her eye but she wouldn’t let him. 

“You’re sitting actually.” She said pointedly, still making an effort to not return his gaze. He sighed in relief, dropping his head against her shoulder.

 “Geeze, love had me dying.” He mumbled. “Thought I’d have to start singing to ya.” He slumped into his chair, making himself as cozy as possible.

 “Wouldn’t have minded, know how much I love when you sing.” She teased, offering a small smile that tugged on the corner of her mouth. Harry flushed at her compliment, he only ever sang for her and his mum. He drops his head with a sheepish grin, fingers fiddling his rings for a second. Lauren softens deeper when she catches his diffident actions, knowing just how vulnerable he is about that area of his life. 

She had caught him singing on accident the first time, they were making dinner in the kitchen of his place, one of his many playlists going in the background. She remembered chopping onions to ‘Sparks’ by Coldplay when she’d heard him. It was faint at first, barely audible over the music, but this enticed her to listen harder. She turned from her position quickly, walking to his side of the kitchen to grab the kitchen towel. She was happy he hadn’t stopped when she approached him and decided to not comment on it then. He was rather good, a lovely voice she’d noted. It was unlike Harry to not flaunt the areas he was rather good in and Lauren figured it was something he wasn’t keen on sharing.  It wasn’t until he sang twice more that she spoke up. They were in her living room, the TV muted and a playlist of her own droning in the background. That was how they shared songs with each other, shazam’ing secretly in the other’s presence. Mac Ayres’s ‘Slow Down’ was playing softly and Harry began to sing absentmindedly.

 “Y’know this one?” She’d said without considering it, closing her mouth quickly afterward. Harry looked at her guiltily, nodding with a small chuckle. 

“Looked it up last time you played it.” He admitted. Lauren grinned, she always took secret pride in introducing Harry to new things. 

“You’ve got a nice voice, by the way.” She scrolled down her timeline in an effort to not watch for his reaction, knew he’d be a bit embarrassed. Which he was, he’d never thought of the possibility of Lauren actually hearing him. He knew that it wasn’t unlikely that she had, he had become that comfortable with her he supposed. But nevertheless, the compliment had him turning crimson. She never said anything about it after that. She wanted him to be comfortable around her, a safe space like he was for her. 

“Maybe I should sing more often if it means you’ll be mad at me less.” He chuckled, scratching his jaw in recovery.

 “Maybe you’ll be so busy singing, you won’t be able to do the things you do that make me mad.” Lauren smiles a closed-lipped sarcastic smile which only makes Harry grin.

 “Touche.”

 The seatbelt light dings then, signaling their takeoff and their attention is lost from one another. Lauren turns to look out the window, her blanket folded over her legs. She wore shorts in preparation for the warm weather upon their arrival, but it was a terrible idea. Her thighs stuck to every chair she sat in and the peeling of her skin from the fake leather was causing irritation. Harry could see the grimace in her face whenever he extended his hand to help her up, and at first, he thought it was because she was angry with him. It was when she rubbed tenderly at the back of her thigh that he realized. He offered to buy her some sweats from the tourist shop but the scowl she’d made was enough for him to not push it further. That was exactly what had gotten him the silent treatment in the first place. Instead, he placed his courtesy airline blanket over her chair before she sat down. Lauren wanted to be mad that he continued to be unreasonably sweet to her even without paying for anything, but she was too relieved to care. She had also worn short sleeves - which was a rookie mistake - and was deciding if it was her legs or arms that would suffer. Harry had layered up and truthfully didn’t mind. Lauren unfolded the blanket and extended some to him with a small apologetic smile. He returned one of his own, lifting the armrest between them.

 “Here get some rest, you had a long day today.” Lauren rests her head against his shoulder without a word, more than grateful for his offer. Harry rests his cheek on her head, inhaling her scent quietly. 

***

“Wake up, love.” Harry puts the rental in park, reaching over to gently touch her arm. “Food will be here soon.” Lauren lifts her head from the window, groggy and disoriented. She groans, stretching within the small confines of the vehicle.

 “What’d you order?” She grumbles, stifling a yawn with her words as she undoes her seatbelt.

 “Chinese. Got that sushi you like too.” He smiles softly at her though she’s not looking. He had decided that he’d let himself play pretend for a while, figured it couldn't hurt to just let himself be. If that meant living in delusion for the duration of their vacation, then so be it. He’d be there waiting until she wanted to make it a reality anyhow. 

The Airbnb was very quaint and sweet. Harry tried hard to find something that would feel like home for Lauren and still offered a nice view of the beach. He walked behind her through the front door, lugging a suitcase and waiting anxiously for her reaction. The layout of the space was open, not too much focus on the living room but rather on the kitchen that harnessed the view of the pier. Bright blues and grays decorated the home, deep mahogany hardwood adding just the right touch of home. 

“Oh, H.” Lauren breathed, her eyes wide as she took in her surroundings.

 “Do you like it?” He asks nervously, placing the suitcase by the door. There were more bags to be grabbed from the car, but he was enjoying the look on Lauren’s face far more.

 “It’s amazing, Harry. Really, I love it.” She turns to him, sporting a smile larger than Harry has ever seen her wear, and he wishes he could make her smile like that every day for the rest of his life. His arms wrap around her figure when she embraces him, placing a small kiss on his cheek. “Thank you, I appreciate this.” She says, letting her fingers graze his face in their close proximity. Lauren smiles gently, hoping that her words were enough to express just how appreciative she really is. No one had ever gone as far as to consider the small details that were important to her. She was genuinely grateful to have a friend like Harry.

“Anything to see you smile, you know that.” He speaks softly, the pad of his thumb rubbing small circles at her back. He places a slow kiss on her forehead, letting his lips linger for far longer than they should before pulling away. “I’m gonna grab the rest of our stuff.” His tone is just above a whisper, and Lauren is too enchanted with him to say anything before he’s out the door and down the porch steps. 

She was enamored by her surroundings, Harry’s sweet touch, and his words - things that would usually overwhelm her. But given her circumstances, she had never felt more cared for, the grave she had dug for herself had just become several inches deeper. She ran her hands along the cold stone of the large island, gazing into the darkness out the large windows. There was an alcove on the opposite side of the room that overlooked the scenery that was sure to be stunning in the morning, and Lauren was glad she had brought her favorite book along. She wanted to wait for Harry before going on a proper tour of the home, but curious eyes had her wandering down the long hallway. From what she had seen, there seemed to be no upstairs to the home and she was grateful. She hated homes that felt divided into too many parts. She decided to wait for Harry before checking the rooms out and made her way back to the kitchen. On the opposite side, there were large sliding doors that led out to a massive backyard with a pool that was lit up a light purple color. The air warmed her skin as she ventured outside, eyes resting on the patio set that would be perfect for breakfast in the morning. She made a note to wake up early so she could make breakfast for him. She’d already noticed that the cabinets and fridge were stocked full of groceries, surely something Harry had arranged, and she wanted to do something special for him. 

“Gorgeous isn’t it?” His voice startled her, only bringing a smile to his face as he leaned against the doorframe. She turned to face him, a shocked expression on her face and he couldn’t tell if it was the view or his sudden reappearance that had caused it. Lauren shifted on her feet, looking back out towards the view where she could vaguely make out the shape of the sea. “It really is, Har. I can’t thank you enough.” She breathes, fidgeting with her fingers as she speaks. The thought of how much he must’ve spent on such a nice stay made her uneasy but she figured she’d just enjoy it, there was no use in arguing over it.

 “The food’s here if you’re hungry, darling. After we eat we could go on a little tour if you’re not too tired.” He hums, twisting his rings around his fingers. He wasn’t uncomfortable with her around, only slightly surprised that he had even made it this far. He knew it would be a long shot to even get her to agree to come along with him, and it was nice to see that his efforts weren’t in vain. Harry honestly thought he’d take the trip by himself and sulk around the pier for a week. He hadn’t thought about what would happen if she actually came along with him, figured he wouldn’t get his hopes up with wishful thinking. 

“That sounds lovely actually.” She sighs, her stomach growling at the mention of food and Harry offers his hand to her before leading her into the kitchen. Lauren ushers him to sit, telling him the least he can do is let her make his plate. They had similar ways of showing their appreciation for each other, though Harry spent way too much money. Lauren liked to do little things for him, pick up a book he hadn’t gotten around to purchasing, unloading his dishwasher every now and again. They were always subtle actions that she didn’t think Harry realized but he always did. It was the way those little thoughtful acts made him feel that had him showering her with gifts and his constant attention. Those things were priceless to him and everything he did was in an effort to repay her. 

He remembered when he moved to Georgia after finishing college and how he felt like it would never feel like home. He had always figured he’d move back to England after school but there were more opportunities in the states for him. The first year was lonely, so he threw himself into his work and made friends that way, but nothing felt quite right. He always felt like a visitor until he met Lauren, she was his roots. Not the job, or his apartment, but her. As he watched her plate his food for him he couldn’t help but smile fondly at his best friend. She didn’t know it, but she was the reason he had stayed in Atlanta for as long as he had. Sure new opportunities had arisen for him in various places, but he only wanted to be wherever she was. 

“Better than home, huh?” She said over a mouthful of food. They had eaten mostly in silence, tired from a long day of traveling. The silence was nice now that Harry wasn’t being forced into it. He nodded while wiping his mouth, chuckling at Lauren’s terrible table manners. “Only by a little, you know how good the food is back home.” He leaned back in his chair, pushing his cleared plate away from him. She nodded in agreement, setting her fork on her own plate and letting out a sigh of content. Harry moved to clear their spots but she stopped him, insisting that she’d do the dishes in just a bit. He frowned at her but she wasn’t budging, grabbing his hand in hers to keep him seated.

 “You can throw away the garbage, but I’ll clean up. Let me, please.” She sighed, knowing that if she let him she’d never lift a finger the whole trip. 

“Deal, but let’s do the tour first then we’ll clean and unpack its getting late.” It was a little after one in the morning and the pair were exhausted. 

Harry kept her hand in his for the entire walk around the house, most excited when he showed her the courtyard, promising her it was more spectacular in the daytime. Lauren was in awe of everything he showed her, thinking that even if they never left this rental home her trip would still be well spent. He watched her choose which room she wanted, chuckling gently when her eyes widened at the size of the master. Complete with an en suite that encompassed a clawfoot tub she almost drooled at, she insisted that Harry take the largest room. Of course, he was prepared for the stubborn conversation that followed and in the end, Lauren’s suitcase was placed at the foot of the bed. She feigned a pout as she unpacked her bags, but Harry could see just how happy she truly was. His room was just across the hall, with an equally spectacular view just sans a patio. Harry didn’t care where he slept as long as she got everything she deserved. 

“Afraid your bed is comfier than mine.” He groaned, pushing his face deeper into the mountain of pillows. 

“Oh don’t start! I told you to take the room.” She stood at the end of the bed with her hands on her hips, a half-folded shirt crumpled in her fist. Harry laughed tiredly, rubbing his eyes with his knuckles. 

“M’just kidding, love. I swear a cardboard box would be just as fine right now.” He yawns dramatically, reaching his arms above his head.

“Head on to bed then, H. Know you’re tired.” She hums, putting the last of her things into the dresser. She liked putting her things away even when on vacation, it made her feel slightly more comfortable with staying somewhere that wasn’t home. 

“I should, shouldn’t I?” He sits up and runs a hand through his disheveled hair. She hums and makes her way towards the bathroom to wash her face. “Goodnight, love. I’m right across the hall if you need a cuddle.” He says sleepily. 

Lauren smiles at him through the mirror as he stands behind her, placing a small kiss on the back of her head. “Might take you up on that, I can never sleep well the first night of vacation.” She sighs, rubbing her cleanser into her skin gently. 

“Well if that’s the case I’ll just sleep in here with you tonight. Can’t have you tired on our first day.” He hums. She nods, more excited than she dared to admit out loud about sharing a bed with him. Sure they had plenty of times before after a night out or a hang out that lasted a bit too long. But it had been a long time since the last time.

 “I’ll go get ready for bed, be back in a minute.” She nodded again without a word, finishing up her routine by brushing her teeth. She was slightly happy that she had made it around to do some shopping and had picked up a couple of cute pajama sets.  The thought of wearing her oversized t-shirts on vacation wasn’t all that appealing and nice pajamas were always good to have. 

A few moments later as promised, Harry was snug in her bed waiting for her. It was definitely a sight she could get used to but decided not to think about too much. She tossed her old clothes into her travel hamper that she’d neatly set up in the closet before making her way to the dresser. Harry watched her with curious eyes as she applied lotion to her skin, making a note that she always used that brand before bed, he was sure to buy her more when they got home. He watched as she put her hair up into her bonnet, giggling sleepily at how cute she looked.

 “Literally takes you an hour just to get into bed, come on I’m sleepy.” He whines, sinking deeper into the covers. She laughs, assuring him that she’s almost done. She takes off her rings and places them neatly with the rest of her jewelry before climbing into bed and turning off the bedside lamp. Harry extends his arms to her, willing her to come closer and she obliges, settling softly against his chest. She doesn’t mind when he entwines their legs, twisting their bodies together so it’s hard to tell where his begins and hers ends. 

“So happy you’re here.” He murmurs, his breath tickling at her ear. Lauren’s stomach swarms within itself as he pulls her impossibly closer, fingers tracing aimlessly at her back.

 “Happy to be here.”  

Untangling herself from Harry the next morning was one of the hardest things Lauren feels she has ever had to do. He was so warm and the way he groaned when she pulled away from him almost broke her heart wide open. When she was finally free of his grabby hands and pouty face she shuffled to the bathroom, promising that she’d only be gone for a minute. It was the only thing that the sleepy man would acquiesce, although she knew she wasn’t coming back. It was 8:30 in the morning, far too early for Lauren’s liking, but she was excited to cook in the beautiful kitchen down the hall. After sliding on her slippers she quietly made her way towards the door, looking back to see Harry cuddled up with the pillow she had previously occupied. She smiled softly, closing the door behind her. 

Thirty minutes later, the bacon and eggs were cooking and a mountain of assorted pancakes sat prettily on a plate. Lauren sang along softly to Harry’s playlist as she cooked, carefully scrambling cheese into the eggs so they would be perfect. She had cut up some of the fresh fruit and set it up nicely in a glass bowl, everything waiting on the island to be brought outside. Harry wandered groggily down the hall, the smell of food pulling him out of his sleep. He wasn’t all too pleased when he woke up and Lauren wasn’t beside him. He had slept better than he had in a while last night and was looking forward to waking up with her in his arms. Lauren had felt the same, she wasn’t much of a cuddler and usually liked her space when she shared a bed with someone else, but it was different with Harry. With him, she didn’t feel smothered or overwhelmed, but safe and warm. 

“You didn’t come back.” He pouts when he reaches the kitchen, leaning on the counter beside her. 

She chuckles, removing the eggs from the pan and onto a plate. “Made you breakfast.” She smiles and the pout leaves his lips immediately.

 “I know, woke up to the smell of it. Looks good, bug.” She swats his hand when he cheekily pops a diced pineapple into his mouth.

 “S’just about ready, need your help taking everything outside though.” She says as she takes the bacon out of the oven. He nods and begins to fill his arms carefully. Lauren had already brought the plates and silverware out, along with the orange juice and glasses. She followed Harry outside carrying the eggs and bacon, taking a seat when everything was set up nicely. 

“Thank you for this, I appreciate it.” He says once they’re settled and Lauren is done taking a video for her Instagram story. She sighs around a mouth full of pancakes, wiping her mouth when she swallows. 

“The least I could do, really.” She looks out towards the yard, which was even more beautiful in the daytime. They could see the beach from here, the sun glistening on the ocean, and a breeze wafting the scent through the air. 

“What do you want to do today? Didn’t really plan any activities for us so we can relax.” He shovels a forkful of pancakes into his mouth, fighting the urge to moan at how delicious they were. He always loved her cooking and was grateful that she cooked for him often.

 Lauren shrugs indifferently, “Not really in the mood to go anywhere. I do wanna take a bath in that tub though.” She laughs. 

Harry nods along with a chuckle, knowing that would be her answer. “Guess we could hang out by the pool then, sounds good to me.” 

Lauren had stayed in the bath for longer than she had promised, just as Harry knew she would. She could see him go out to the backyard after about twenty minutes of soaking from the window adjacent to the tub. She watched as he applied sunscreen and laid out for a while, and knew it would only be a matter of time before he was knocking on her door because he was lonesome. Just as she predicted, five minutes later he rose from his chair and sulked inside. Lauren couldn’t fight the laugh as she rose from the tub, stepping out carefully. After drying off and putting her robe on she opens the door only to find him standing there, a pout on his rosy lips.

 “I know, I know. I’m coming, sugar.” She breathes, chuckling at his sorry expression. This only makes his frown deepen, moving to the side as she steps into the bedroom. “I saw you out there, looked miserable.” Harry sits on the bed and she opens the dresser to find a suit, pulling out two before tossing the other back into the drawer.

 “Always miserable without you.” He picks aimlessly at the comforter before twisting his rings around his fingers.

 “You’re a whiny little thing, aren’t you?” She chastises him in a feeble attempt to not dwell on his words for too long. She was used to his behavior, knew how vocal he always was about the way he felt. But she was not used to hearing it constantly like she was, and it was becoming more and more difficult to pass it off for just friendly banter. They’d never spent more than 24 hours together, mostly Lauren’s own doing,  and it was becoming easy to think he meant the things he said differently than she thought he had. It was nice to play pretend for a while, but she knew better than that. Nothing good would come out of fantasizing over someone she couldn’t have. 

“Only when you take too long, bug.” Lauren shakes her head at him and goes to the bathroom to change, purposely putting a noticeable pep in her step. Harry laughs behind her, falling back to lay against the covers of the unmade bed. She had reprimanded him for that earlier, but neither of them had made any efforts to fix it. 

When he sits up again his throat goes completely dry at the sight of her in her yellow bikini. He didn’t know much about women’s swimsuits, but he was certain this one was made for her. Unconsciously, he licks his bottom lip, pulling it into his mouth with his teeth as she rubs some sunscreen into her skin. He had seen her in a bathing suit plenty of times before, but that was before he’d fully come to terms with the way he felt about her. She always looked good no matter what she had on and he always was sure to tell her, even before she was the sun, the moon, and the stars to him. 

“S’that new?” He said, shifting to rest with his hand behind him. 

“Yeah, got it before we left. Do you like it?” She does a turn for him and he almost wishes she hadn’t. Her figure was full, hips and an ass to match. Her stomach had some give to it, creating a pudge that she always tried to hide.

 Harry has to manually close his mouth before he responds, shifting in his seat. “You look gorgeous.” He smiles. He lets his eyes rake over her for longer than would be appropriate, but she doesn’t mind. Truthfully, Lauren had bought the suit with him in mind even against her better judgment. She was a bit nervous when she had tried it on because it wasn’t a suit that would hide some of her insecurities. She never liked the way her thighs would jiggle and her behind would shake as she moved, but she knew she didn’t have to worry about those things while around Harry. He always made her feel good about herself and slowly but surely she’d come to agree with him. It was a cruel thing to do to herself, and Harry, but she was enjoying his reaction.

 “Thanks, we match.” She giggles, gesturing to his yellow trunks. He smiles a dimpled smile at her, standing up from the bed and towering over her.

 “I don’t look half as good as you do though.” He compliments her again, unsure if he’s capable of keeping his eyes off of her. 

She’s thankful for the melanin in her skin that hides her blush as she eyes her reflection in the wall mirror. Harry stands behind her, taking in their appearance. He liked that they were matching, however cheesy it was. He pulls his phone from his pocket and opens the camera, grabbing Lauren’s hip to pull her closer. The first few were regular vacation pics. It was when Harry bent down to place his lips to her cheek, that things took a different turn. Lauren was caught off guard, the smile on her face becoming genuine and one of her hands holds his cheek while the other is placed over his at her hip. Harry snaps a few shots, letting his touch linger before pulling away. They review the pictures together and once Lauren has decided on a favorite, Harry sets it as his lock screen. Her smile was wide, her eyes shut as he kissed her cheek. She was a perfect ray of sunshine and now he could be reminded of it every day. 

“Oh, I forgot my sunnies.” She frowns as she digs through her bag again. 

“Got them right here, love. Left them on the dresser.” He sits in the lounger next to her and pulls his own sunglasses over his eyes.

 “You’re an angel.” She thanks him, putting on the frames and chasing the glare of the sun away. She’d made them Piña Coladas and they sipped idly to beat the heat.

 The warmth was welcomed though, Lauren practically lived outside during the nicer months back home. It was nice to feel a warmth only the sun could provide. They laid in silence for the most part, Lauren’s mind adrift and Harry’s as well. She thought about the girls back home and how they were doing, and Harry mostly thought about her. He thought about ways to finally tell her, he thought about what the consequences of those actions may be. He thought about ways to make it so obvious that she couldn’t deny it any longer. Mostly he thought about a scenario in which she loved him back. That one was always the easiest to fall into and hurt way less so he stayed there. In this scenario, she couldn’t rip his heart out with rejection. In this one, she was there at home waiting for him, he was picking her up from work, they shared meals, they slept in the same bed every night. Even though they were sitting a few feet apart, he felt as if she was miles away from him. It was always like this and he wished that things were different. He wished for a life where she would let herself be, where she would let herself be happy. He knew more than anyone just how deserving she was of it, and he wished that she’d let him be that for her. 

“Come swim with me.” He beckons when his thoughts become too much. He tries not to focus too much on the way her skin glows under the sun, her complexion radiant as if she were its favorite.

 She groans as she sits up, and Harry extends his hand to her pulling her from her chair. He doesn’t let her hand go as they move towards the pool step, and Lauren uses him for stability as she tests the water with her foot. It takes her a minute before she adjusts to the water, and Harry follows behind happily once she’s in. He sings along to the music playing from the speaker as Lauren floats around on her back. She wishes there was a float or something so she could still catch some rays, and makes a mental note to stop by a shop tomorrow. The sound of seagulls and Harry’s voice relaxes her to a place where she feels likes she’s floating in a perfect nirvana. The atmosphere he’d created for them just what she desperately needed but would never ask for aloud. Harry swims closer to her when he becomes bored, calling her name softly to not startle her. She hums in response, blinking her eyes open behind her sunglasses, and sits up so she can tread water. 

“What do you think about going out tonight? I’ve got some friends here and they wanna meet up for some drinks.” He pulls her closer to him by her wrist, dragging her to the shallow end and into his arms. She holds onto his forearms as she contemplates his question, mostly thinking of what she brought to wear.

 She nods, “Would love to.” He smiles down at her and places a small kiss on her forehead. 

“Then tomorrow we can head to the beach - the best cure for a hangover.” He smiles softly and she rolls her eyes.

 “Plan on getting me drunk, Styles?” She splashes some water up at him and he chuckles, pulling her closer to his chest to stop her assault. 

“Just a little bit.” 

***

For the first time in forever, Lauren is grateful that she over packed. She had thrown more than a couple of evening outfits into her suitcase just in case they went out to dinner or frequented a bar for the week. She ditched all the blouses and things alike at home and opted to bring more revealing outfits because of the weather. The skirt she picks out is a pretty shade of blue and spandex material with a matching cropped top. She was also grateful she brought her comfy white shoes with the thick heel and open toe. They were her favorite shoes to go out in and were easy to dress up. They made her short legs look longer, and she always felt her best when she put them on. After doing her makeup she dresses, the slit up the side of her skirt adds the perfect amount of sex appeal and she feels she has never looked better. 

She walks into the kitchen to find Harry sitting at the island. He looks away from his phone when he hears the sound of her heels clicking against the hardwood, and he swallows harshly when she comes into view. He himself was wearing cream slacks with a t-shirt tucked into them. His hair was pushed away from his face the way Lauren adored, he always looked much younger when he did that. He lets his eyes rake over her as she stands beside him now and her eyes watch him in bemusement. 

“Y’look gorgeous.” He sighs, licking over his bottom lip when his eyes meet hers again and she smiles gently at him, giving him a spin as always. She mutters her appreciation and Harry pulls her closer to him, holding her at arm’s length to truly admire her. Innocent giggles fall from her full lips as he repeatedly tells her just how good she looks. He couldn’t help but notice how the material hugged every curve she had, the slit on the side showcasing her thick thighs that had Harry near drooling. Her ass is damn near perfect and her heels do wonders for her legs, and Harry knows that this might be one of the longest nights of his life.  Lauren falls to his chest, hiding her face in his shirt, and he places a gentle kiss on the top of her head. 

“Car will be here in just a minute, lovie.” 

The bar was more of a club and when the Uber drops the pair off, Harry grabs a hold of Lauren’s hand, bypassing the line towards the bouncer. Lauren wasn’t sure what his plan was but is pleasantly surprised when the bouncer gives Harry a nod and moves to let them through. Lauren can’t help but move along to the music as Harry leads the way through a crowd of people. The scene brings her back to her college days when fun was expected on every weekend and most weekdays. She admittedly missed going out and dancing, and was grateful that Harry brought her here.

 They make their way to a booth where two other men are sitting, and they jump up as soon as they catch sight of Harry. They’re all jeers and hellos as they embrace and Lauren hangs back for a moment. Harry turns quickly, tugging her closer to his side as he introduces her. Harry had known these guys from college and would visit California often to see them. They were just as attractive as Lauren was expecting, all of Harry’s friends were. Micah was tall, a fade cut, and wearing a suit that seemed very expensive. His smile was warm and inviting, he seemed clean and sharp around the edges. His skin was deep and rich, he was fine. Seth was more on the leaner side, towering over both Harry and Micah. His blonde hair was curly and long, stopping at his shoulders. He too had a perfect smile and a deep charming voice that had nearly knocked Lauren off her feet when he greeted her. She thought quickly that these men would be fun to flirt with, but the idea was gone as soon as it came when she noticed the wedding bands on each of their fingers. 

 They sit at the booth for a while and conversation is easy as Harry gushes about Lauren and all that she was doing. Harry stands to order another drink for each of them once their’s expires, leaving with a kiss on her temple and a promise to only be gone for a minute. The two men share a knowing smirk behind their glasses unbeknownst to Lauren.

 “He never shuts up about you, hasn’t in years.” Seth smiles politely and Lauren grins bashfully.

 “He gets a little excited sometimes, yes.” She shifts in her seat, itching to get on the dancefloor. 

The men chuckle and Micah swishes the content of his glass around. It was very clear to them that Harry still hadn’t made any advances and it was also obvious that Lauren felt the same way that he did. Harry returns just as Lauren is finishing up telling the guys about her life growing up in Georgia. He slides in with a grin, placing his arm around Lauren’s shoulders and pulling her close to his side.

 “Hope these two haven’t bored you half to death, love.” He pushes her drink towards her and she swats at him.

 “Better company than you, I think.” She smirks, pulling her drink to her lips. Harry clutches at his chest in fake hurt and his friends laugh.

 “She’s just as brilliant as we expected. Feel like we’re in the company of royalty with the way you go on about her.” Micah and Seth are all grins as Harry tries to fight the blush from creeping up his neck. Of course, his mates knew just how bad he had it for her and he should’ve known that they wouldn’t let this be easy.

 “What can I say?” He exasperates, “She’s just that perfect.” His hand finds Lauren’s thigh as he chuckles beside himself and she leans into him with a soft smile. 

They go on like that for a while and their glasses remain full. Lauren can feel the effects of the alcohol she’s consumed and she listens in quietly as the men talk business. She was beginning to grow impatient with every song that passed, wanting to release her new energy on the dance floor. Her hand finds Harry’s at her thigh and she places it over his. He gives her a gentle squeeze and she hums, toying with his fingers. She fiddles with his rings for a while, and Harry looks down at her when the conversation slows.

 “Y’alright, love?” He hums into her ear and she nods, glassy eyes looking up to find his. 

“Wanna dance.” She harrumphs, taking a slow sip of her drink. Harry lets a small laugh fall from his lips, nudging her head with his nose.

 “In a minute, yeah? Need to be nice and drunk for tha’.” She giggles drunkenly at that, and he squeezes her thigh again. “I’ll order some shots for us.” Harry announces to the table, “ This one wants to dance.” Lauren lets her head roll back onto her shoulders as she laughs. She downs the contents of her glass and dances in her seat when he returns. Harry does the shots fast, making a face when he finishes and Lauren giggles some more as Micah and Seth begin their banter. 

Soon enough, Harry’s vision is cloudy and he feels the warmness in his chest engulfing him and he bids his friends good night when they decline the offer to join them. He’s pulling Lauren to the dance floor when he hears a song he particularly likes and she follows behind with a giggle, shaking her hips as she holds tightly onto his hand. They form a sort of circle as they move to the beat, the alcohol making their moves slightly untimely. Lauren finds herself gravitating towards Harry, and his hands reach for her hips to pull her towards his chest. She closes her eyes as she moves to the music, her head tipped back as she holds on to his shoulder. One of his legs is brought between her two as she rocks her hips, his breathing is heavy as he watches her. Their chests are pushed together as she sings along to the lyrics, allowing herself to let loose for a moment. He rocks his body into hers, matching her slow movements. Her hand finds the side of his neck after a few songs, tugging him closer to be heard over the loud music. 

“I’m gonna go get another drink!” She shouts. Her inebriated mind allows her to let her lips linger for a moment and she doesn’t move away when he pulls back to look at her.

 “I’ll get it, ‘ve got a tab open!” He leaves a lingering kiss behind her ear before they part and she’s left to dance by herself. Lauren didn’t mind dancing alone and lifts an arm over her head as her feet carry her side to side. 

 When warm hands hold her hips again, she doesn’t think twice as she dances. She falls back against his chest, moving her hips against him. They rock from side to side for a while, until he’s gripping at her thighs and whispering into her ear.

 “Let’s go take this elsewhere.” He groans and Lauren jumps away from the unsuspecting partner. 

The man is, in fact, not Harry, rather Harry is moving his way through the crowd towards the pair. He watches the interaction as he comes closer, nudging strangers slightly. The guy is whispering into her ear and Lauren is shaking her head profusely denying his advances. The look on the man’s face is one of frustration as he throws his arms around to argue his case. Lauren takes a step back and gestures to Harry when he’s in her view.

 “Think I’ll take it from here!” He shouts, nodding in the direction of where the man should go and Lauren takes her drink gratefully. The man scoffs, muttering to himself as he leaves. Harry pulls Lauren back against his chest, bending down to speak into her ear. 

“Should’ve known better than t’leave you by yourself! M’sorry, love.” She hums at the sound of his voice, a shiver raking down her spine. 

Harry doesn’t like the feeling of jealousy that resides in his chest. Doesn’t like the idea that another had their hands on her, and he knows that it’s irrational to think this way, but he can’t seem to help it. He grips her hips tighter in his hands as she dances against him after telling him to forget about it. But he can’t seem to forget it, his empty hand runs along her side as he brings his face to the side of her neck. She extends her neck and he breathes her in, his nose dragging along the sticky skin. Her hand tangled in his hair and she slows her movements, dipping their bodies slowly as she continues to move her hips.

 “You’re so gorgeous.” He groans into her ear, drunkenly kissing at the skin on her neck. She breathes in sharply, her eyes fluttering closed as he squeezes at her thigh. 

She rolls her head to the side in search of his eyes, and he leans his forehead against hers. His drunken eyes are hooded and he can’t seem to look away from her parted mouth. She brings her drink up to her mouth as they continue to move, sipping the rest of it through the straw. Her inhibitions were low enough to let whatever should happen, happen and she couldn’t say that she would mind if they had. He turns her around in his arms and brings his leg back between hers. He drops his face near hers, his breath fanning over her lips. She bites her bottom lip and places her forehead on his as she whines to the music. His lips find her ear again and they brush over her skin when his head sways slightly. He pulls her closer to him by the small of her back, and he can just barely feel the heat of her center against his thigh. 

Lauren’s mind is borderline incoherent from the alcohol and the way Harry was lighting a fire within her. Sure she had danced with many guys in her past, but this was intimate. The way he was grasping at her fleshy hips, beckoning her impossibly closer, this felt personal. He just couldn’t seem to get enough of her and didn’t know how much longer he’d have her this close. His fuzzy mind was telling him to go for it, and the option didn’t look that bad at the moment.

 “So fuckin’ pretty.” He says into her ear, and Lauren bites back a whimper. She’s gripping at his shirt desperately and he brings his face back to hers, nudging her nose with his own. She lifts her chin slightly, begging him to go on and his eyes watch her. Hooded eyes, parted lips, she was totally blissed out and he’d be damned if he missed his moment. 

He takes it. Slowly at first, lips grazing over hers hesitantly. She sighs into his mouth when his lips fully encase hers, soft and supple. They pull apart slowly after the first peck, eyes peering at each other partly in disbelief. Their attention is elsewhere than the club they were standing in, moving too slow for the pace of the music. His hand holds the side of her face as she leans up to look at him. Harry chases her lips again, closing over her bottom lip and tugging. Her fingers entangle in his hair to hold him to her and she presses her chest to his. Their kisses remain slow like their thoughts, pulling at the other’s flesh as eyes pry open slightly. Lauren takes the initiative and tugs at his hair gently, sliding her tongue into his mouth when he gasps. He groans into her mouth, his body alight with a fire he could feel burning through his being. She caresses her tongue over his languidly, pulling kiss after kiss from him. Harry pulls away and captures her bottom lip, kissing at it. 

“Let’s go home.” He breathes into her ear and she nods, slipping her hand through his. 

The Uber ride is all stolen glances and soft touches, an unspoken thing lingering in the air around them. As soon as they’re through the door Harry is kissing down her neck from behind. Lauren hums, falling into his chest as her hand still holds onto his.

 “Let’s get ready for bed, yeah?” He mutters against her skin before releasing her and heading down the hall. 

Lauren stands in her spot, astonished at his behavior but follows him anyway. He turns into his room without a word and she goes to her own, collapsing onto the bed. Her mind runs in circles when she closes her eyes, and she can’t bring herself to change her clothes. The heels alone needed to be unbuckled and she didn’t think she had the dexterity for that. Harry comes in after a few moments and chuckles at the sight of her.

 “Supposed to be getting ready for bed, love.” He teases, sitting on the floor and grabbing her ankle. She sits up to watch him, leaning on her elbows as he places the heel of her shoe on his shoulder. He kisses at her soft skin on her ankle as his fingers undo the belt, massaging at the sore skin when the shoe is placed on the ground. Lauren groans audibly at the feeling, letting her head hang back as he continues. When the other shoe is pulled off he places her pajamas on the bathroom counter. Lauren takes her time changing and washing her makeup off, mentally preparing herself for what might happen. She giggles to herself at the thought that this was actually happening. She wasn’t sure if it was a good idea or not, but her mind had already convinced her that this was what she wanted. She doesn’t focus on the complications of what they’d started, her mind swims with unreasonable thoughts and she can’t seem to identify all the flashing warnings that she’d worked so hard on maintaining. Her rule was to never mix business with pleasure, and if she was being honest, the business aspect of their relationship had dwindled away so long ago. Now Harry was her favorite friend, her favorite soul, and she should take advantage of the opportunity. 

When she comes out of the bathroom, Harry is sat on the end of the bed, fiddling with his rings. He looks up at the sound of the door opening and stands, making his way towards her. He grabs her hand when he’s close enough, and pulls her to him, spinning her so her back is to his chest. A loud giggle falls from her lips as he sways them side to side, planting small kisses to her cheeks.

 “Ready for bed, love?” He hums, raking his fingers up her side. Her satin tank lifts slightly as he goes on and a shiver rolls through her, all she can manage is a nod. She puts her hair into her bonnet before climbing into bed, and his hands are on her again like they never left. Harry’s mind warns him to stop but he can’t seem to and he’s rolling over her and burying his head into her neck. She whimpers as he sucks on the skin, not enough to leave a mark but she’s gripping his hair nonetheless.

 “Completely adore you, bug.” He murmurs against her jaw, pressing soft kisses to her skin. A small whimper leaves her lips and her eyes are hooded. She pulls him closer so their chests are touching, and turns her head to find his eyes. He nudges her nose with his, smiling slightly as she croons. When their lips meet he’s humming contentedly into her mouth. Hands grab at her hips, squeezing in anticipation, and her jaw unhinges enough for him to slide his tongue inside. Lauren rolls them over then, straddling one of his thighs as he lays against the pillows. Their kiss is patient as she hovers over him, her forearms resting beside his head and fingers tangle into his hair. A cheeky hand finds its way to her behind, groping a handful and pulling her up against his thigh. Their lips part when she gasps, her head hanging backward on her neck. Harry smiles to himself at the perfect vision before him, humming when his lips kiss right underneath her chin. She looks down at him through glossy eyes, pressing her hands to his bare chest as she moves over his thigh. He sucks in a sharp breath through his teeth and places his hands around her wrists as she works herself against him.

 “Such a dream.” He says. His words string together slower than usual, and if she weren’t privy to his drunken dialect, she’d have missed it completely. She bends down to place her forehead to his, kissing at his nose softly and his eyes flutter closed.

 “So pretty.” She murmurs and moves to place her head into the crook of his neck, placing small pecks to the skin there. Lauren relaxes as his fingers trace patterns on her back and the world spins when she closes her eyes for too long. “M’so smashed.” She sighs, a giggle follows and Harry can’t help but laugh along with her. He rolls her off of him and leans on his side. His fingers graze at her cheek and she hums, nuzzling into his touch. 

“Kiss me.” She whispers, her eyes peering at him through her lashes. He doesn’t hesitate to move in, placing his lips over hers gently. He can feel her sigh against his mouth, chasing his lips when he moves away. He watches as her face contorts with frustration and he kisses her again, even softer this time. 

“Quite like kissing you.” His voice is below a whisper and she doesn’t think he meant to say it aloud. Her stomach swarms at his confession and she pulls her bottom lip into her mouth with her teeth to fight a smile.

 “Won’t last long.” She sighs, slotting her lips against his once more. He licks into her mouth, swirling his tongue over hers, and huffs into her. 

“What do you mean, pet?” His brows furrow and she’s chasing after him again, pressing a hand to his chest when he comes back to her. 

“Have to forget about it tomorrow.” She sighs against his mouth, jaw hanging slack when he grabs at her ass again. 

“And why’s that?” His teeth bite at her chin as he pulls her against him, eating up every whimper that falls from her sweet mouth. A particularly loud moan of his name has his eyes rolling back to his head, and his ego inflating. Praise from her was the only thing he ever cared about, it was all he ever thought about, and all his actions were done to please her. He loved her, way more than he thinks she loves him and he’s okay with that. He has no other option but to be. 

“Because we’re just friends.” She breathes behind a moan and Harry doesn’t believe her for a second.

 Friends don’t resist each other the way these two have been. There would be no reason to if they were truly just friends. She wouldn’t be melting into his touch, whimpering his name, tracing his tattoos when she thought he didn’t notice. He always noticed. He noticed the way she’d visibly relax when he hugged her, how her eyes averted his gaze when he complimented her. It was why he allowed her to steal his every breath, and consume his every thought. She was into him, and even though she fought it as hard as she could, she wasn’t fooling him. 

“Best friends.” He ruts his hips into her, watching her eyes roll to the back of her head, and he kisses her cheek gently. Her hazy mind pleads with her to stop things, put a pin in them before they can’t take them back. She was her own worst enemy, sacrificing her own happiness for the sake of stability. There was no reason valid enough for her to deny him, but there she was, pushing against his chest and tugging his heart out in the same motion. 

“We’re drunk.” She deadpans. Harry huffs, pulling her closer to him by her hip.

 “Have been for a while now, sweetheart.” His lips search for hers and she succumbs, slipping her fingers through his hair. 

She groans as his mouth works against hers. He tilts his head and she follows until he’s hovering over her. He liked to be in control, he didn’t like the bullshit that she was spewing at him, and this was certain to shut her up. Lauren had never been kissed like this in her life, and she can’t remember the last time she had spent this long just making out. In a way, she wishes she were sober, coherent enough to reminisce on this correctly in the future. She would be lucky if she could remember at all, and in some ways, she hopes she forgets. 

“Harry,” She whines when their lips part for a second and he licks at the corner of her mouth before pushing his tongue inside once more. His forearm finds the pillow on the other side of her head, and Lauren is wrapping her arms around his neck. 

“Keep whinin’ my name like tha’ and I’ll make sure you won’t be able to forget this.” He smirks against her mouth. She whimpers, nails scratching at his scalp. She’s pulling him closer to her, needing the weight of him to remind her of her reality. Though she wasn’t sold that it was a reality she would like to keep, she was certain that she would love him even more tomorrow. 

“Jus’ gonna kiss you to sleep I think.” He hums, slowing their pace down and remaining in control. 

This was the only time he was calling the shots when it came to Lauren, and he was gonna seize the moment in case it never came again. The alcohol in his veins makes his movements sloppy, leaving a trail of himself across her chin. She doesn’t mind, quite liked the desperateness of it all. He’s all teeth as he pulls at her bottom lip, releasing it to watch as it snaps back into place. He admires the way her drooping eyes watch him and he’s sure to put on a show for her. They’re quickly learning what the other liked and Harry silently prays he doesn’t remember this because he's sure the flashbacks would haunt him. He kisses her again, pulling away quickly to watch how her chin chases after him. Her lips are parted as he toys with her, nibbling and suckling as he pleases. Her breathing is slow as their lips move together, relaxation engulfing her. Small whimpers and moans fall from their lips as he continues, wandering hands familiarize themselves. When their kisses begin to slow he rolls them over so her head is tucked into his neck. All she can manage is a quiet hum and he shushes her, fingers tracing over her back. 

***

Harry wakes before her, the sun streaming through the patio doors, bringing him to consciousness. Memories from the previous night flood his mind and he’s pulling Lauren closer to him. He remembers her hesitation, the way she had told him to forget the whole thing. He brings his arm up over his eyes, a headache pounding at his temples, and the mess he had created for himself wasn’t helping by any means. He breathes in her scent as she sleeps, dreading the moment her eyes open and the same realization floods her memory. Harry can’t decide what he would even say to her. Should he confess or act like he didn’t remember as she’d wanted? He wanted to bring it up to figure out why she had pushed him away the way she had. It hadn’t then, but it hurt to think about now. Rejection wasn’t something he experienced often, but it was still his biggest insecurity when it came to her. It was the reason why he had kept his feelings at bay for so long, and now he had gone and ruined everything they’d built. But it wasn’t as if she had rejected him because she hadn’t felt the same, she seemed pretty into it last night. But things always change when inhibitions are back in place, and the sun shines through the light of day. He decides that should she remember he’d tell her and if she doesn’t he’d redo it sober another time. Either way, if she doesn’t bring it up, neither will he. 

The task is easier said than done, he’s nervous all through breakfast and as they pack for the beach he can’t help but stare at her. There was no possible way that she didn’t remember and if she had chosen to put their actions in the past, she was doing too good of a job. Lauren almost wishes she had forgotten, but Harry seemed to be playing it cool so she would too. She figured things would be easier this way, no one would get hurt and their relationship wouldn’t change. Except it had, and Harry was hurting far more than he would care to admit. She continues to pack their cooler and ignore his watchful gaze. It was hard enough to try to misplace the memory of his hands gripping her thighs, or the way he’d said her name. She tried not to dwell on the way her body fit so perfectly against his like they were made for each other. Or the way he kissed her like his life depended on it. But she wasn’t going to speak about it unless he had, just like she asked of him. Now that she thought about it, it was a stupid thing to ask of him, but she knew it would be for the best. 

“Can you grab the sandwiches out the fridge, bub?” She asks, pulling her focus away from her thoughts. Harry turns towards the fridge without a word, tossing the sandwiches onto the counter before walking down the hall. 

She pushes the air out of her lungs and stops her actions once she hears his door slam shut. He remembered, and he was pissed.  He sighs to himself as he changes into his swim trunks. He thought the whole thing was just stupid and childish. He knows that she knows, and the way she could remain so nonchalant about it was bothering him. Was that all he meant to her, was he that easy discardable, had he misread their entire relationship? He knew he had fallen for her and he liked to think that she had too, but had she no feelings for him at all? Maybe she had meant what she said. That they were “just friends”. His stomach is uneasy and he doesn’t think that he can bring himself to face her. He needed a minute to calm the tempest in his mind, but he knew that wouldn’t happen with her in the room right across the hall. 

“Are you upset with me?” Lauren asks after they’ve been sitting on the beach for close to two hours and the conversation is nonexistent. 

They had barely spoken when he emerged from his room, only offering one-word answers to her feeble attempts at conversation. Their walk down to the shore was silent as he carried their bags and she pulled the cooler. She tried to not draw attention to it, to move on in the way that she knew that they should, but he was making it difficult.

 “At you? No. At myself? Yes.” He says. Sunglasses cover his eyes and he doesn’t so much as glance at her. She huffs as she grows agitated with him, flipping onto her stomach to look at him better. 

“We can eat lunch and talk if you’d like?” She offers. It seems that the only way out of this was through it and since Harry wouldn’t let her forget, she’d have to suck it up and have the conversation. 

“You told me to forget about it, so that’s what I’m fucking doing.” He doesn’t mean for the words to sound as harsh as they had, and he regrets them as soon as they leave his mouth. It was probably best to talk about what had happened, but she had let him sit for too long, and his thoughts had gone from upset to angry. He doesn’t apologize and fights the urge to look at her when he sees her moving from the corner of his eye. 

“Well, you’re doing a terrible job.” She bites as she sits up on the blanket. He looks at her then, a scowl etching its way onto his lips, and his temper rising. 

 “I’m so sorry I won’t discuss my feelings for you on some crowded public beach, Lauren.” His smile is mean, and she has never hated the way her name sounds coming from his mouth more. He seldomly called her by her name, always opting to use pet names or nicknames instead. She can’t seem to focus on anything else but the way he had said it. He had said it with such distaste, and the stupid smirk on his lips makes her blood boil. 

“So I’m ‘Lauren’ now?” Her voice is just barely audible and even though he can physically feel his heart ripping in half, and can’t seem to stop. He keeps his eyes towards the sky, knowing that if he does look at her, he’ll be putty in her hands. That was exactly what he was trying to put an end to. The way she so effortlessly had played with his feelings, toyed with his heart, and threw it to the side when she didn’t want to play anymore. She had hurt him worse than any woman ever had, and he wanted her to feel miserable along with him. 

“That’s how friends call each other, right? By their names?” He swallows roughly, closing his eyes as his skin heats under the sun. He can’t see her, but she’s shoving her things into her bag, making way for a quick exit. And before he even realizes it, she’s leaving him there and walking back to the house without another word.

 Lauren could count the number of times he had been upset with her on her hands and never had he gone so far as to be purposefully mean. She didn’t know how to deal with him when he was like this, and she was upset that it had even gotten to this point. In her eyes, Harry had no reason to be upset with her, not to the point where he was being mean, anyway. Sure she can admit that asking him to put what they had done behind them was a stupid, drunken mistake. In an effort to protect her own heart she had damaged his and she felt awful. But that was no excuse for Harry’s childish behavior. 

As she treks up the sandy walkway to their home his words bounce against the forefront of her mind. Behind his snarky smile, he had admitted that he did have some sort of feelings for her and she could pretend no longer that she had no clue what they were. She had spent so long convincing herself that she couldn’t be with him and had missed the signs that he was falling for her. All the walls she had set up to protect herself he’d effortlessly pummelled through, and had never given her reason to believe that she couldn’t trust him with her heart. She had been so blind to the way he had changed around her. The way it was so effortless to be with him, and the way that neither of them had any other love interest over the past two years. Lauren had always contributed that to their busy work lives, but it was time for her to be honest. The only other person she ever made time for was Harry and vice versa. The only person she ever dared to consider beyond herself was him. He was the first person she shared any exciting news with and the last person she talked to before she went to sleep at night. And as much as she would like to believe that she had kept it platonic, her actions showed a completely different Lauren. She was having her cake and eating it too, without the consideration of Harry’s feelings. 

She sheds her things by the front door before retiring to her room for a bath. As she strips down she tries to rid her mind of all the times she should’ve made her intentions clear. But at the same time, her intentions were a reflection of what she really wanted from their relationship. She could admit to herself that she was in love with him, but when it came down to owning up to it, she was as lost as a teenager doing this for the first time. And in a way, it was her first time. She had never felt anything as intensely as she did when she was with Harry. She’d never suppressed her feelings this way. She was used to getting what she wanted and not caring about the consequences, but this consequence she felt everywhere. 

Tears sting at her eyes as she soaks in the bubbles. Here she was sitting in a damn Airbnb on a trip that was perfectly planned and tailored to her liking, and she didn’t even have to ask for it. Harry had shown her time and time again just how much he cared about her and she told him to forget her in a moment that should’ve brought them together. It was selfish the game she was playing. Everything was on her terms. And even though she hadn’t meant for things to turn out this way, she supposes this is the way they’d been heading for a long time.  They were both stupid. Stupid in a way that they’d tiptoe around their feelings for each other, taking whatever the other would offer and writing it off as a friendship. 

The water isn’t warm enough to melt away the sinking feeling in her stomach. She knows she’s fucked up bad this time and doesn’t know how she could fix it. She could blame her drunken actions, but that wouldn’t dismiss the way they’d handled each other today. And of course, she knew that she’d bring it up somehow today, she was figuring a way to slip it into their non-existent conversation. She’d never be able to simply forget it and she knew that. She knew that when she’d woken up and his arms weren’t around her and she could still feel the indent of his fingers against her skin. God did she love the way he touched her. She loved how quickly he’d got her to fall deeper into his embrace, succumbing to his hands and turning her brain to mush. She supposes she liked that the most. The way she felt as if all the planets had aligned perfectly when his hands were on her body. Or the fact that said fingers had touched her everywhere except where she had needed him most. She was no stranger to his teasing, was privy to the mischievous glint in his eye when he had something up his sleeve. And she should’ve known better than to think that it wouldn’t follow him into the bedroom. Lauren is almost agitated with herself for not exploring that side of him a little more.

Not to overlook the way he had known exactly what to say, exactly where to touch to have her rendered breathless. Putty in his hands ready to accept the outcome of her fate. She had taken advantage of that when the time was so fleeting. Though she knew their situation was less about fault and more about their lack of communication, it was hard to not feel some sort of guilt. She was upset because she had unintentionally made Harry upset, and she often took pride in the way she knew how to please him. She was always the one to make sure he was having just as good of a time as she was, especially when she drags him along to do something she particularly likes. She knows just how fidgety he can be, and the seemingly mundane tasks that brought her joy would offer Harry anything but. But he always stuck them out, reassuring her that any time spent with her was time well spent. She likes to think that they do that for each other, checking on the other when brought outside of their comfort zone. There was something simple about their relationship. Something that had just come so easy. Lauren supposes that is what had made it so difficult to grasp what it was. 

She can remember the fear that she had felt when her gaze had lingered on his naked chest for a second too long and she felt the butterflies erupt in her belly. At that point Harry had become like family, the initial shock of attraction had dwindled long before. She had figured that it was just lust anyhow and would subside the way those first feelings had. Except these feelings were nothing like the kind when you run into a cute guy at the grocery store. The way she had looked at him now had stemmed from her learning who Harry truly was. And once she had learned to love him because of all the attributes that made him who he is it was game over. She loved the way he rubbed at his nose when he was trying to make his words sound perfect. She liked the way he could be so calculated but so lax at the same time. She adored the way he thought of her opinion and considered her at times she’d liked to believe she would consider him as well. They had gotten along so well and she didn’t want to worry her mind with attachments and emotions. However, in that time she’d spent convincing herself that she couldn’t, she certainly had.  

In some ways, she likes to blame Harry for the way she had dismissed his advances. It wasn’t as if the writing on the wall was so plain, after all. She supposes that if he hadn’t been so damn charming to anyone that had the pleasure of being in his presence for more than fifteen minutes, she’d be able to think more clearly. On one hand sure, the man who plans a detailed vacation has it bad for you. But on the other, that same man could light up the world and empty their pockets with so much as a smile. He was kind and thoughtful, and just good. Too good. The kind of good that makes you believe that your feelings that would undoubtedly bloom have sourced from delusion. And the months that Lauren had spent arguing with herself that he would do these things for anyone who so much as asked were exhausting. In that exhaustion, she had failed to make the rather impressive connection that she hadn’t asked. Harry had considered her and did for her simply because he wanted to. But when your pessimistic mind is so bent on making you believe one thing, the latter is easy to miss. 

She doesn’t move from her spot in the alcove when she hears the front door open then close. The sound of the plastic wheels of their cooler rolling against the hardwood floors isn’t enough to turn her head, but it’s enough for her focus to be lost from her novel. She stares at the pages, the black ink swirling and becoming one haunting picture, wishing she could make herself small. He hasn’t noticed her presence yet and she can’t gauge his mood when his back is turned to her. Still shirtless, she notices the way his muscles move beneath his skin as he puts their uneaten food into the fridge. The extra sighs and huffs of frustration aren’t lost on her either, and for a second she fights herself from getting up and lending a hand. She remains stationary, though, her fingers flicking the dog-eared page. She’d read the novel more times than she could count, the one she holds now is her second copy. It’s the one Harry had surprised her with one Valentine’s Day after her’s had all but disintegrated from the seams. He claimed the holiday was a minor convenience of presenting it to her, but Lauren let the romance of it all cloud her mind in a Harry-filled fog. She took better care of this copy, always kissing her teeth when her old habits of folding the pages would surface. The note he had left in the cover, however, had melted her down to the bone and she swore she’d make this copy last forever. 

For the sweetest girl with the heaviest touch, be gentle. H. 

Admittedly for Harry, the few words he had scribbled into the paperback had far more meaning than what she’d figured. She’d touched his heart and transitioned his life. Her influence was just that. Heavy. Almost so heavy that at times he found himself wondering if he was wasting his “good years” pining after a girl who had no interest. He was savvy that way, leaving hints and tips that his heart burned for her, and almost every time feeling sour when things hadn’t changed. He wanted her to be more gentle with him. He at the time was still new to the way he felt about her, constantly thinking of ways to make it obvious. But obvious for Harry wasn’t obvious for anyone else. At least not to a girl who had convinced herself otherwise. He wasn’t so used to the uneasy feeling that swarmed his stomach when she went out on a date. Wasn’t accustomed to the way his heart would race when her fingers would dance along his shoulders. And he certainly wasn’t privy to the way he seemed to have lost all logical thinking when it came to her. Truth be told he’d give an arm and a leg just to see her smile but now that he could recognize how he felt towards her, that had gone beyond sensibility. He needed her to be gentle with him, to not shatter his heart because he knew he’d never recover. 

Lauren is pulled out of her reverie, fingers still stroking the pages of her book as she reminisces. Her teeth bite at her lip as she waits for him to notice her presence. She was dying to say something, anything, but that couldn’t be done if he wasn’t willing to speak to her. At the same time, she’d be fine with saying nothing at all. She thinks to herself that she should’ve known better. Five days with just the two of them under the same roof should’ve had her running in the opposite direction. She should’ve expected lowered inhibitions and drunken words said without thought. But instead, she’d continued to live in the fantasy world that she’d created for herself. The one where she does as she pleases and expects Harry to move with her. 

She holds her breath when he puts the last of their food away and closes the fridge door. She buries back into her novel, the words not making it past her eyes but she pretends nonetheless. She only looks up when she hears him gasp. He stands behind the island, palms pressed to the cold surface and a look of shock etched into his expression at the realization of her presence. She offers a shy smile that doesn’t quite meet her eyes and tries to decipher if he’s still upset with her. He seems calmer if his face is any indicator, and his sunglasses are now pushed atop his head. Under any other circumstance, she’d take a moment to ogle his chest and the way his biceps flex as he pushes himself away from the counter. However she still takes a quick peek, her teeth still gnawing her bottom lip raw. 

When she finally brings her gaze to meet his own she feels her nerves beckoning her to retreat to her room. Everything in her begs her to run away and forget the argument that they’d had. She hated confrontation, would rather forget it and move on than work through it. For most of her life that is exactly what she had done. Nothing was worth exerting that kind of energy into and more times than not, she wasn’t up for it. She liked to lay low, and would rather be someone’s peace than their problem. 

She feels frozen in place as they gaze at each other. Suddenly the room feels much cooler than it had before and she’s unsure if she’s ready to face the can of worms that they’d opened. She wanted to tell him that she was wrong, that she was sorry, but she’d be fine if he’d decided to move on. But that wasn’t the kind of person Harry was. He was the stick to it and fight through it kind of person. He didn’t like mulling over things for a long while and would rather tackle the things that bothered him head-on. There wasn’t a chance that he’d decided to not bring it up and Lauren was bracing for the impact. 

“Didn’t know you were there.” He mumbles, crossing his arms over his chest as he leans his lower back against the edge of the countertop. She nods stupidly, eyes shifting down to her book in her lap. Uncertainty swims through her like a sailboat caught in a storm, and she’s not ready for the waves to crash over her just yet. She’s sifting through the thoughts in her mind, trying to quickly form sentences that would convey her regretfulness. At the same time, her brain is muddled with thoughts and memories of everything that had led them to this moment. She can’t read him, his face is expressionless and his jaw is relaxed in the way that makes her palms sweat. Her throat is dry and she almost opens her mouth to speak before thinking better of it. The silence between them is deafening, she can feel his gaze from across the room as her fingers trace the title of her novel. 

She looks up when she hears him moving around the kitchen, and he’s moving towards her still without expression. A grimace finds her lip when he sits beside her and she’s drawing her knees to her chest to make room for him. Harry sits down beside her with a sigh, crossing his arms over his chest with his gaze out the back windows. He slides his body further into the cushions of the bench and another breath of air expels from his lips. Lauren eyes his profile suspiciously when he makes no efforts to speak, still silently gazing at the horizon of the ocean. It was nearing sunset and the sky had begun to paint itself a pretty shade of orange. Her favorite time of the day, where everything was touched by the sun, changing color to honor her beauty. In those minutes it was hard to think about anything besides the divinity of the sky. A moment of reflection, she’d like to call it. Sunsets always reminded her of just how big the world was but simultaneously she felt intense comfort. Everything just felt better. Everything was beautiful, everyone was kind, and nothing mattered. Something short of a small utopia.

 But the way she felt right now was anything but. She admired the way the sun cast a glow onto Harry’s tanned skin and deepened the color of his hair. If it were any other moment she’d crawl into his chest to watch the sky change with him. Now she sat facing him, the sun turning her eyes golden and warming her skin. She thinks about the time they went to watch Memorial Day fireworks. Sitting atop the largest hill Harry knew to exist in Georgia. They got there early because he knew how much Laren loved to watch the sunset, and how much he loved to watch her. She remembers how his eyes kept shifting between the sky and her profile, and the way she’d looked at him when he had that funny look on his face. He smiled at her, the kind where his lips only parted a tad, and pulled her closer as the air began to chill. Her gaze stayed on his as best she could, a silent indication that she wanted to know what was on his mind. He hums, tangling their fingers as his eyes gaze over her features. 

“Your eyes look like little pots of honey.” He smiled, tilting his head slightly. A smile pushes its way onto her lips as she turns away bashfully. He’s pulling her closer then, letting her hide her face into his shoulder. He can’t help but chuckle and place a gentle kiss to her hair. “So pretty.” He’d said. Lauren can’t forget the way he kept her hand in his the entire evening. She supposes she should’ve known then. 

His fingers wrapping around her ankles pulls her back to focus. He pulls her feet into his lap wordlessly and Lauren relaxes. Even in the silence, she feels more at ease than she had all day. The pads of his fingers rub at her skin seemingly unconsciously as he appears to be deep in thought. Her eyes are fixated on the bridge of his nose and the dip of his lip and for a moment, everything feels okay. 

“Suppose we should talk, yeah?” He murmurs, tearing his eyes away from the sky to let his cheek fall to his shoulder.  She nods, humming when he squeezes at the sole of her foot. He knows she’s a bit nervous, can tell by the way her fingers haven’t stopped circling over the cover of her novel. He fights the soft smile that threatens to overtake his features when he realizes which book it is. He can barely make out the shadow of his writing beneath the lifted cover. His hands on her skin ground him, and the changing sky makes it difficult to stay mad at her. He regrets the way he spoke to her, more sorry than he could express about being cross with her. He knows that he could’ve handled it better -- should’ve handled it better, and mostly he regrets letting her walk away. 

He opens his mouth to speak, but when his eyes meet hers it falls shut. He’s lost in the way her eyes glow in the sun, the warm brown shining, and for a moment he’s lost everything he was going to say. Once again his heart feels too big for his chest, his brain empties and everything seems insignificant. His body is enchanted by her, love overtakes him and he knows that he can’t let the opportunity pass him by. Before the silence lasts too long he’s running a hand up her leg and closing his eyes for a moment. “M’sorry about what I said earlier.” He starts, the low and steady bass of his voice cutting through the air. “I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that and I know I made you upset.” He’s fiddling with his rings when he finishes, unable to watch for her reaction. 

“Harry,” Lauren sighs, her chin dropping to her chest as she grapples with the words she needs to say. Harry’s lost in the way his name sounds like a song falling from her mouth, and he’s humming unknowingly. His eyes find her face again and he’s almost mad at her for being so damn pretty. 

“I’m sorry for telling you to forget about last night.” She breathes. Her palms sweat and her fingernails create half-moons on her skin. Her throat feels dry as she tries to maintain his gaze, willing herself to not be distracted by the soft features of his face and his apologetic expression. “It was a stupid thing to say, especially knowing it was the furthest thing from what I wanted to say.” She chuckles beside herself and Harry’s expression turns from sorry to perplexed. She’s twisting her ring around her finger with her thumb and the way her eyes stay fixed on his, he’s not sure if she realizes that she’s doing it. 

He lets a beat pass when he realizes that she’s finished, and suddenly he’s inclined to pry. “What did you want to say?” He asks unassumingly, relaxing his expression slightly. Lauren pushes out a sigh, looking towards the setting sun for an answer. The gentle graze of his fingers on her shins eases her discomfort. She doesn’t look at him when she speaks again, and he can’t help but notice the way her skin gleams under the touch of the sun. “Wanted to tell you,” She breathes in deep, sucking the air to her lungs and hopefully mustering up some courage as well. “--Wanted to tell you that I’m completely enamored by you. And that I’ve never felt more cared for in my entire life and that terrifies me.” Her eyes are back to his on her last word and he takes in the way they’re glossed over, glistening under the rays of the sun. 

For a second it feels as if he’s in a state of comatose. His chest is swelling and bursting and filling him with the warmth of a thousand fires that he thinks he might explode. The orange hue cast on her skin radiates around her and he swears she’s never been more beautiful. His smile threatens to split his face as he fully rests his cheek on his shoulder. He’s humming, pulling her legs closer into his lap and fighting the urge to wrap her up in his arms. Her words bounce around the forefront of his mind and he can’t focus on anything other than what she had said. 

“I’m scared too, but only of letting you get away.” He says gently. Her brown eyes watch him carefully as he brings his finger to flick underneath his nose, and he’s looking at her again with that same bout of sincerity he had on that Memorial Day. She’s silent, the steady drum of her heart reverberates behind her ears and she feels as if the moment would slip away in a second. “I’m sure that I love you more than I’ve loved anything or anyone. And I’m sure that I’ve never felt this way before, which scared me at first, but now my only fear is losing you.” He breathes.

 He’s unaware of the way her lip quivers slightly, and her hands ball into themselves. She feels as if her chest has been cracked wide open and every fear or worry that she’s ever had dissipates. Harry’s focus is on his hands, small remnants on a smile taint his lips. He loved her. Lauren almost wants to punch herself. What was all of this for? Why had she put up so many walls just to let him worm his way through? Why had it taken so long for her to realize that maybe, just maybe, he loved her too? She thinks she can blame it on her own insecurities, but even those Harry had made feel minuscule. She was worthy of love and worthy of happiness. That was all Harry had been trying to make her realize. She loved him. More than she knew what to do with but she was content that she got to try. 

Without a second thought, she’s removing her legs from his lap and standing to her feet. Harry looks at her with shining green eyes, irises bright from the light of the sun. She moves to straddle his lap and his hands find her uncovered thighs with ease, humming at the feeling of having her close again. The smile on his face is bright, crinkling the corners of his eyes and dimpling his cheeks in the way that Lauren loved. It was the face he made when he was so ridiculously happy and needed a release of emotion. She brings her hands to the side of his face, a grin splitting across her face. The sun was almost beyond the horizon now, an amber hue encompassing their small sliver of earth. The final rays of the day caress the skin of her back, warming her to her bones. “I love you.” She hums and Harry is lost in the glow of her eyes and the crinkle of her nose as she smiles. He lets his eyes flutter shut for a moment, relishing in the way he feels right then. When she’s nudging his nose with her own, he opens them again and hums at the feeling of her skin on his. 

“I love you.” He repeats, the skin of his lips brushing against hers and she sighs. He lets his hands trail up her sides and around her back slowly, up and down until they're under her t-shirt. He leans up to connect their lips softly, humming contentedly. He takes his time this time around, memorizing the way her lips slot over his and how her fingers squeeze behind his ears. He has nothing to prove now, no flashing club lights blurring his vision, no alcohol to numb his thoughts into oblivion. Everything was out in the open, into the universe, and blooming under the sunshine. 

As his lips close over her bottom one he’s smiling softly and dropping his forehead to hers. He kisses his way along her jaw, pressing others to the lifted apples of her cheeks. Soft words of adoration fall from his mouth as he continues, and her jaw falls to her chest when he gets to that spot behind her ear. She’s mewling into his touch, raking her fingers through the long strands of his hair. He hums at the small pleas that fall from her lips and places a gentle kiss at her temple.  “Not gonna run from this, this time?” It’s posed as a question but the look in his eye says otherwise, and he’s pulling his chin away when Lauren goes to slot their lips together. “Asked you a question, love.” The cool metal of his rings bites at the skin of her back and she feels her insides swarm with the change in the tone of his voice. She’s damn near whimpering as she moves into him again only to be met with his retraction. Her breathing is shaky as she strings her words together, maintaining his eye contact. “Not going anywhere.” She assures him, biting at his chin. Harry pulls her closer then, reconnecting their lips and biting at her top one. His hand moves from under her shirt to the side of her face, fingers squeezing behind her ear when he moans on his next breath. 

She adores the way he kisses her with such fervor. Even as she leans over his seated frame, he commands her to follow his lead with every part of his lips and turn of his head. She doesn’t mind letting him work into her mouth and moans when his tongue slides over hers and finds home. He pulls her closer into his lap, a low groan reverberating in his chest when she sits on the becomings of a hard-on. Lauren hums into his mouth once again as she rolls over him and grips his hair a bit tighter. Harry pulls her bottom lip into his mouth, biting on the flesh before pulling a kiss from her. His palm is splayed across her lower back as she grinds against him and he watches her face with parted lips when he pulls away from their kiss. When he’s met with her golden eyes he can’t help but let his jaw hang slack for a moment. He takes in the small pants of air falling from her kiss swollen lips, and he doesn’t let the warm flush of her cheeks slip his notice. He almost whimpers at the sight before him, entranced with the pure unadulterated version of it. He’s vaguely aware of her hands slipping down his shoulders to his chest, fingers creating crescent-like shapes in their wake. His focus is blinded by the way she kisses across his jaw, familiarizing herself with the skin right below his chin. She nips there for a moment, sucking a deep bruise on the stretched skin and his eyes are rolling back into his sockets. 

The selfish need to have her closer racks through him, and he reckons he’d never grow tired of having her this way. Both hands are back under her shirt, desperately tugging the fabric higher up her ribs. His eyes are a gentle plea of consent and she nods, raising her arms over her head silently. He kisses at her smooth brown skin, suckling next to a freckle he’d been eyeing all week. She can feel the short pants of his breath at her ribcage as the shirt is moved up towards her arms. His touch is light as he moves the shirt over her shoulders, green eyes boring into hers in an intense stare she can’t tear her eyes away from. Their eye contact is lost for a moment when the shirt is tugged over her head and Harry’s moaning against her skin before their eyes reconnect. She hadn’t felt it necessary to put on any kind of underwear after her bath. The task itself seemed mundane as she had dwelled on her once dreary thoughts. But now as the cool air hits her skin and her shirt is tossed to the floor, she’s sucking in a breath through her teeth and her nipples are pebbling. Harry doesn’t hesitate to envelope one of the buds between his lips, humming in satisfaction when her fingers tangle through his hair once more. She lets out a wanton moan as he flicks at her nipple with his tongue, rolling her hips against his in anticipation. 

“Fuck.” That is all he can manage to breathe out when his hips rut into her on the next forward roll of her hips, and his bottom lip rests on her skin. Lauren brings her hand to the side of his face, admiring the little furrow between his brows. “So fuckin’ pretty.” He whines and pulls her back to him by her neck. He pushes their lips together in a chaste kiss and pulls away to watch her chase him. Her brow furrows and he offers a soft smile, lips slotting against hers softly.

 “Want you so bad.” Her voice is just above a whisper but he catches it and the words turn his stomach in ways that he’d only dreamt about.  He rests his forehead at the base of her throat in an attempt to bring himself down to earth. This was something that had never left the confines of his conscious, something he reserved for his alone time. “I’m yours. Always have been, pet.” He says into her skin, placing a gentle kiss where she’s swallowing harshly. Fingers cart through his hair softly, and she places a small kiss on his head. He turns his head to the side to catch her gaze, brown eyes shining in the lasting embers of the sun. The drum of her heart pounds beneath his ear and his hands find her hips to pull her closer to him. He watches the way her eyes flutter shut when his erection slides against her soft center. The material of his swim trunks is thin enough for her to feel the slight curve of his member and she can’t help but want to feel him completely. She seldom thought about him this way, the thought of it always got her too worked up to continue. But when she had, she had imagined every detail.

“Need you.” She exasperates, her head falling forward on her neck. He captures her lips between his own then, tracing his tongue along the curve of her, and sighing. He can’t think of a time where she had ever been more vulnerable with him, and as much as he wants to satisfy her every need, he wonders how much she’s willing to share. He hums against her mouth when she tugs at the roots of his hair, a whimper falls from her mouth when he pulls away slightly. 

“Where do you need me, lovie?” His bitten lips brush against hers as he speaks, the low octave of his tone spurring her on. She turns her head, groaning against his cheek and he chuckles deeply. He moves his hand up her side, gliding over her rib cage and gently cupping the swell of her breast. Her breathing is shaky, mind muddled with nerves and desire. His fingers tweak at her nipple, pulling just enough to elicit a moan from her pouty mouth. “Harry-” She whines, her jaw hanging open as she tilts her head up towards the ceiling. “Need me to help you feel good, babe?” He hums and trails his nose against the length of her neck. She nods meekly, turning her head to capture his lips in a swift movement. Her hand finds the side of his neck when she feels him about to pull away, sucking his lip into her mouth before offering him her tongue. He grunts, kissing into her and letting her take control of his mouth for a moment.  She moves her mouth against his quickly, a feeble attempt to distract him and he’s groaning as he submits to her. His other hand moves around her back until he’s gripping her ass, sliding her back into his lap with a sigh.

 “Got to use your words, sunshine.” His grip is tight on her, stilling her movements and making her whimper desperately into his mouth. He was so hard, harder than he thinks he’s ever been in his life but he loves her this way. Needy, clinging to his shoulders and whining against his temple. “Make me feel good, H. Please.” She barely recognizes the sound of her own voice. He’s humming against her skin, tonguing his way along her throat. The hand that had played idly at her breast makes its slow descent down her stomach and in between their bodies. He plays coyly around the hem of her shorts, dipping his fingers in slightly to run across the smooth skin of her stomach. “Right in here?” He asks absentmindedly, watching her face as he pushes a single finger into the front of her shorts. They moan together, Harry in the realization that she wasn’t wearing any underwear at all. 

“Fuck, yes.” She whines as the tip of his middle fingers collects her wetness before running up to her clit. She exhales a shaking breath, her hips grinding down on his slow-moving digit. He’s moving so slowly in a way that makes her brain fuzzy, and her eyes dilate under the shifting sun. “Want me here or do you wanna go to bed?” He breathes, soaking his finger in her as he pushes into her. Her back arched into his chest, fingers scratching at his scalp and she’s unsure if she could breathe let alone tell him what she wants. He’s pulling his finger away slightly when she doesn’t answer, green eyes peering at her as her eyebrows furrow. 

“Here, love. Please, feels so good.” Her mouth hangs open as he’s pushing two fingers into her on his next go, groaning at the feeling of her squeezing him. His fingers reach places she could never reach on her own and she pants quick breaths as she rocks against his hand. His hand at her ass guides her with his rhythm, soft pleas fall from her lips when he curls his digits and scratches at the spongy spot within her. 

“Look so fuckin’ pretty riding my fingers like tha’.” He moans, voice gravely with his own arousal just from watching her. His words rang through her ears, spurring her hips to come down on his fingers with every thrust. He had managed to get her so close to the edge rather quickly, and the familiar tingles shot down her spine as she neared her finish. 

“So close, H.” She whines, dropping her forehead to focus on his eyes. What she sees instead has a deep guttural moan ripping through her chest and it takes everything in her not to screw her eyes shut. Harry had a hand down his swim trunks, squeezing and pumping at his length. When his eyes meet hers again, his mouth falls open in bliss his eyes a gentle plea for her to come for him. With his next thrust into her, he pushes his thumb against her clit, rubbing slow steady circles until she’s crying out his name in a way he decides that he loves. 

“Make a mess on my fingers, baby. Wanna feel you.” He groans before pulling her nipple between his teeth and his fingers reach for that spot that he knows will bring her over the edge. Her hands claw at his shoulders as he sucks a deep bruise into the underside of her boob. When her legs begin to shake against his thighs he pulls his hand out of his trunks and cups her jaw to pull her mouth back to his. Their kiss is all brushing lips and deep moans as her orgasm rushes through her, tensing her body and he works her through it. “So fucking good for me.” He says against the corner of her mouth as she comes. His thumb slows its movements at her clit until she’s grabbing at his wrist when it becomes too much. 

She places a soft kiss against his lips when she comes to, slotting her lips against his. His bottom lips rest between her parted mouth as she pulls kiss after kiss from him, eating every moan and whimper that falls from them. He’s pulling his fingers from her then, cupping his hand until he’s out of her shorts. She watches with wide eyes as he brings the digits to his mouth, sucking his middle finger into his mouth and humming at the taste of her. He keeps his eyes open, watching the way brown eyes focus on the way his tongue laps over his finger. When he’s had his share he taps his ring finger against her lips, sliding it through when they part with a groan that has his hips in search of her center. A slow fuck reverberates from his throat as he watches her through a lustful gaze. Her eager mouth sucks him in slowly, putting on a show for him, licking around his digit in a way she had only imagined she’d suck his cock if given the chance. 

“Need t’be inside of you.” It’s a desperate whine, really. An airy plea that falls from rose-colored lips, tickles her insides and fills her with a warmth that blankets her soul. With a nod of her head and a whisper of, please he’s standing to his feet with her in his arms. He puts her down before spinning her in his arms, grabby hands caressing her skin as he nips at her neck. He’s pushing his hips into her as he grabs at hers, pulling her back to his chest. Her head is lulling against his shoulder facing the opposite way as he sucks a deep mark where her neck and shoulder meet. 

“Just can’t get enough of you, bug.” His hands slip up her sides, cupping her breasts in both palms. “Pretty under the sun, like it was made for you.” He murmurs, voicing his thoughts into the open. She whimpers when his hands tug at her shorts, fingers dipping below the waistband.  “Take ’em off.” She breathes above a whisper, placing her hands over his and pushing the tight fabric down her legs. He turns her around in his arms when she steps out of them, hands running aimlessly over her naked body. She’s pushing his swim trunks down his legs, keeping her eyes fixed on his. He watches her with a parted mouth as she drops to her knees before him and steps of out his shorts with a sigh. 

Lauren can hardly keep her hand still as she wraps her fingers around his length, groaning at the feeling of him in her hand. His skin velvet smooth, the weight of him resting in her palm nicely. She kisses around his thighs, whimpering along with him as she spreads the precum around his tip with her thumb. A muffled shit falls from Harry’s lips as he tilts his head back on his neck, blowing a puff of air towards the ceiling. Her heart pounds behind her ears as she takes him into her mouth slowly at first, humming at the taste of him on her tongue. Her eyes flutter closed for a moment, savoring the way he felt in her mouth, how heavy he felt laying against her tongue and she can only imagine the way he would fill and stretch her. She holds the base of him as she circles around his tip, familiarizing herself with every curve and indent of his cock. Harry’s hand finds its way to her hair, bunching at the nape of her neck and she lowers her mouth on him with a satisfied sigh. 

“Yes, baby suck me off like tha’.” He moans as his chin rests on his chest, which was beginning to glisten with a sheen of sweat. She places her other palm of his butterfly tattoo, nails creating crescents in his skin as she peers at him through her lashes. Harry knows that this can’t last for very long, not with the way her small hand stokes at his cock and her mouth swallows him deeper. He knows that if he doesn’t want to cream down her throat he should pull off soon, but the way her hand meets her mouth right under his tip when she’s rearing back has him shifting his hips forward towards her pretty mouth. 

She finds a rhythm of stroking her hand and sucking him off, squeezing at the base of him when she got there. Harry can’t contain the sounds that fall effortlessly from his mouth, whimpering her name like a prayer as he watches her take him down her throat. She lets her wrist twist as she pulls upwards, releasing her mouth from him with a pop in an attempt to gain some air. He nearly loses it when she taps his swollen tip against her stuck-out tongue before she traces the vein that runs along the underside of his length. She kisses at his thighs as she wanks him, leaving small marks on his skin as she sucks. Her thumb swipes over his slit periodically as she keeps her rhythm, twisting her wrist and squeezing slightly when she reaches his tip. Harry’s curling his toes against the hardwood flooring, his hand feeling limp in her hair as he succumbs to her touch, chanting her name as she pleases him. He lets her go on for a moment longer before he’s pulling his hips away from her and meeting her eyes with a breathless pant. 

“Got kinda close there, hm?” She asks as she stands to her feet again with a smile. He nods sheepishly, the words lost on his tongue and he presses his forehead to hers and she grasps at the fleshy part of his hips. She presses her mouth to his again, pulling up on his shoulders and he groans at the taste of himself and the stale remnants of her on his tongue. He brings her back with him as he sits on the alcove bench once more and she straddles his thighs, making a point to sit directly over his hardened length. 

“Gonna be a good girl fo’ me and ride my cock?” He murmurs against her jaw, placing soft kisses to her skin. She nods as she lifts her hips, reaching a hand between them to grab his dripping length. She holds him there for a moment, letting him slip against her folds and brush at her clit, eliciting a moan from her lips. Harry groans at the feeling of her wetness coating his cock and anticipation swells in his chest because he knows his fate. He had dreamt of it more times than he could count. Thought of the way her walls would stretch open for him and squeeze against him as he sheathed himself within her. But nothing compares to the way it actually feels when she sits down on him, drinking him in inch by inch and whimpering a soft cry of his name. Her nails dig into his shoulders and he hisses, watching with wide lust-blown eyes as he disappears within her. 

“Fuck, I love you.” He cries, bringing his eyes to find hers once more. Lauren finds his lips again as his chest heaves up and down against her own. “I’m so in love with you.” She whimpers against his lips when he bottoms out, filling her to the brim. God, was he big. Lauren thinks she has never felt so full in her life, never had she taken a dick as big as his and she needs a minute to just feel him. He kisses her slowly as she adjusts to his size, his thumb caressing the soft skin of her cheek as he lazily moves his tongue with hers. The initial roll of her hips has him moaning a filthy sound into her mouth, his other hand taking purchase of her ass. Her jaw unhinges and their kiss is lost as she does it again, lifting up slowly and rolling her hips forward when she comes back down. The hand on her face joins his other hand, his forearms resting underneath her thighs and holding her ass to guide her. The support allows her to rock her hips faster, bouncing along his length and scratching at his scalp. 

“Taking me so well, baby.” He snaps his hips up to meet hers and all the air is lost from her lungs as she cries out. Harry’s lips find her neck, sucking evidence of the way she was making him feel into the clammy skin. She tugs at the roots of his hair as she moves faster against him, feeling the pit in her stomach knotting itself once more. 

“Feel so full, H. Need you to fuck me.” The words sound so sinful falling from her lips, coated with an intense need for him. She knows there was no way she’d ever let go of this now, no matter what it took to keep it. He was hitting all the spots within her that made her legs shake and knees buckle, murmuring words into her skin that were only ever meant for her to hear. 

He flips them over quickly, resting her head against the arm of the bench with his hand underneath to keep her safe. His other hand pulls her leg around his hip as he kneels over her and pushes his chest against hers. A loud cry of fuck expels from her lips as his hips come down against hers, deeper than he was in their last position and her fingers claw down his back, leaving marks in her wake that she was sure to admire later on. One hand tangles in the damp tendrils of hair at the nape of his neck while the other grabs aimlessly at the apex of his ass while he fucks into her, drawing himself out completely before pushing into her again. 

“Need a proper fucking, yeah? Need me t’show you how much you mean t’me?” He pants against her ear, sliding his arm around her waist to hold her closer. His words further intensify to knot in her stomach, sparks tingling in her spine once more. She rolls her hips up into his, finding his rhythm and crying out when his patch of hair brushes against her clit. “Shit, Harry. I’m gonna come.” Her voice raises an octave towards the end and he’s picking up the speed of his hips. 

“Can feel you squeezing me, bug. Hold on f’me.” The kisses he’s pressing on her skin are a stark contrast from the steady roll of their hips, his tongue tracing behind her ear before sucking on her ear lobe. The pulse of her walls around his cock has him twitching within her, the familiar feel of his orgasm building at the bottom of his spine. He’s not quite finished with her yet, wants to be enveloped in her warmth for as long as he can. He knows he’ll be spending the rest of their stay buried inside of her in every room of the house because he just can’t seem to think about a scenario where they aren’t doing this. And he’s mad at himself for not saying anything sooner because this was what he had been missing. He should’ve been making love to her repeatedly way before they even got to this point, but he figures that it made it better. 

“Fuck, love want you to come.” He breathes against her mouth, hovering over her parted lips as his eyes stay locked on hers, supposing he’d be damned if he closed his eyes and missed the way her face turned when she comes undone. The snapping of his hips is relentless as she chants his name, willing her eyes to stay open as she fucks him back, welcoming the warmth that rushes over her. She tugs at the roots of his hair while simultaneously pushing him closer to her, breathing his name in airy sighs as she feels her orgasm peaking. 

“I’m coming. Fuck, baby, I’m -” 

“Come on my cock, love, need you to come.” He groans along with her as her legs shake and her orgasm ripples through her, squeezing the length of him tightly until his hips begin to stutter and he knows he can’t hold out for much longer. He holds her close as he works her through it, whispering sweet words against her cheek. “Tha’s it, love. So good for me.” The furrow between his brows is deep as he feels the start of his own orgasm building and numbing his legs. He grunts against her mouth as she holds him to her, working her hips as best she can as he rocks into her, bottoming out and staying there for a moment. 

“Come on, H. Want you to come inside.” She whimpers, the fluttering of her walls enticing him to do just that. “Yeah? Want me to fill you up with my come? Gonna take it all?” He rambles behind a wanton moan, his muscles tensing with every word that fell from his lips. She’s crying out his name, begging for his load in a way that makes Harry never want to stop coming. With three more thrusts, his body tenses on top of hers, and she continues to roll her hips as ropes of come paint her insides. Her name falls from his lips as he empties his balls within her, and she watches the way his face contorts, his mouth making an o shape. She kisses his face softly as he comes to, heavy grunts leaving his mouth and his chest heaving against hers frantically. 

It silent for a moment as they catch their breath, the sun has set beyond the horizon and a purple hue covers them. All that can be heard is their labored breath and Lauren carts her fingers through his hair as he softens inside her. She doesn’t want him to move, quite honestly. She has never felt closer to him than she does now, and she fears that if he moves that feeling will go away. Her heart pounds within her chest, her legs beginning to ache and she knows that she should clean the mess between her legs. Before she can move Harry’s slipping from her fold with a moan and grabbing her discarded t-shirt from the floor before bringing it between her legs. Harry laughs at the way Lauren scrunches her face as he uses her shirt to clean her up and he knows it’s only because it’s hers. 

“Didn’t wanna move too far from you just yet.” He laughs and presses a kiss on the side of her mouth. She hums, wrapping her arms around his neck before bringing his mouth back to hers to kiss him slowly. When his tongue enters her mouth she sighs, relaxes into the cushions of the bench and all of her worry dissipates. There was nothing to worry about. Harry loved her and she loved him and time had proven that the only thing that had gotten between that was themselves. She was certain she wouldn’t let that happen again and as their kiss deepened, Harry’s thoughts mirrored hers. 

“Love you, you know tha’?” He hums when they pull apart for a moment and she smiles softly, brushing the fallen hair away from his forehead with a nod. She repeats the sentiment and sits up, stretching her legs with a wince. Harry’s pulling her into his lap, unable to keep his hands off of her for more than a second now that he knows that he can, and Lauren sighs as she rests her head against his shoulder and watches out the window.

“We should take a bath, H. Think you broke my back near the end there.” A loud laugh pulls from his chest and he’s standing up with her in his arms. “M’sorry, love. Let’s go get you all put back together again.” He kisses her forehead tenderly and she can’t fight the smile that splits across her face. “Love you.” She sighs, burying her face into his neck as she crosses her ankles against his ass. 

“Love you, sunshine.”

2.14.21

Masterlist

[seasonschange-butpeopledont]

Candy Hearts

A Deleted Scene from the Book Club-Verse

Pairing: Eddie (Buffy the Vampire Slayer) x F!Reader

Warnings: None. 

Word Count: 586

Author’s Note: Yes, I know it’s July. I started this back in February, but I gave up on it when I didn’t finish in time for Valentine’s Day. I felt inspired to write for Eddie again, so I decided I would go ahead and put this out there as a little bonus content for Book Club. ​

Summary: Eddie finally finds the perfect gift. 

Other Installments to this Series: Book Club - Kindred Spirits – More to Life Than Austen – The Vampyre

Taglist Form - Masterlist

Eddie had never had a Valentine before. 

Sure, there was the obligatory exchange of Valentines in elementary school, but this, standing in the twenty-four hour drugstore staring at heart-shaped boxes of chocolates and teddy bears and sappy greeting cards, felt different. Overwhelming. Nerve-racking. 

Would you even like any of this stuff? 

He stood in front of the chocolates, scanning over each of the decorated boxes. There must have been a hundred different kinds here. Filled, unfilled, peanut, almond, toffee, caramel, mint, dark chocolate, milk chocolate, white chocolate. He’d never actually shared a meal with you before, for obvious reasons. What if you had some kind of allergy he didn’t know about?

It was probably best to take chocolates off of the table, just in case. 

He considered the array of stuffed animals. They were cute and cuddly, but what message did it send if he gave you one of the little bears clutching a love heart between its paws? Would you place it amongst your pillows and think of him before you slept? Or would it sit forgotten on a shelf somewhere? Both possibilities made his stomach twist with nerves for very opposite reasons. The bear was too much pressure, he decided. 

A card, then. 

Were there cards meant to be exchanged between... Well, whatever the two of you were to each other? Had Hallmark discovered the perfect words to say “you’re my best friend, and I think I’m falling in love with you, but I’m afraid of pushing too hard and ruining what we have”, and could they sell them for only $2.98?

And then, in the midst of his agonizing, he sees them. Tucked away on an end-cap, the cast-offs of the commercialized Valentine’s world. A display of pocket-sized cardboard boxes, the picture of pastel pink simplicity. 

The advertisement proudly proclaimed, “If you’re at a loss for words, say it with Brach’s Hearts.”

Eddie picked up one of the boxes, inspecting it closely. The multicolored candies were printed with short, simple phrases like “Be Mine”, “Love You”, and “Kiss Me”. Each heart proudly displayed a thought that had crossed Eddie’s mind when it came to you, a box full of all the things he’s never had the courage to say aloud.

They’re understated little things, far from the flashiest gifts in the store. He remembers their chalky taste, and can smell their overly sweet aroma even without opening the box. He used to love these things as a kid, back when anything with sugar was the key to instant happiness. They were perfect. 

It wasn’t epic romance or beautiful poetry, but it was a sweet, genuine gesture. Classic, if not a bit cheesy. 

Simple. Real. From the heart.

Eddie understood the immortal words of Austen better now than he ever had. 

“If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more.”

There was so much he wanted to say, so many feelings bottled up inside just dying to be let out. He just didn’t know how. He didn’t have the perfect, long-winded declaration of his undying affections prepared for you just yet. He couldn’t pour out his soul to you like the great romantic heroes in your books. 

But underneath those eloquent words, all confessions of love held the same basic sentiments:

Be mine. 

I love you. 

Kiss me. 

Maybe Eddie didn’t have all the right words for you yet, but as he looked down at the little box of colorful candy hearts, he knew exactly where to start.

General Taglist: @theravenreads​ @marshmallowtraver​ @computeringturtle​ @maythxthirstbxwithyou​ @artsymaddie​ @heythere-mel​ @jaime1110​ @rosiefridayrogersunday​ @mssarahpaulsonnn​

Pedro Character Taglist: @pascalisthepunkest​ @coldlilheart​ @fuck-goes-on​ @spideysimpossiblegirl​ @grogusmum​ @fangirl-316​ @writeforfandoms​ @tobealostwanderer​ @diaryofkali​ 

The Book Club-Verse Taglist: @julesorwhatever​ @songsformonkeys​ @sarahjkl82-blog​ @giselatropicana​

Eddie (BTVS) Taglist: @artemiseamoon​ @ickleronniekinsemotionalrange​ @fangirl-of-randomness​ @orneryscandalousevil​ 

[savagenutella46]

Standing Here With You

A valentine’s day gift for @thecaptainhelm lm. (By the way, I love you so much and you’re amazing) I hope YOU have an awesome eventful day filled with lots of love because you’re such an amazing writer and I love you!!!!!!

Also, @eat0crow , who is moderating the gift exchange! Thank you for all you’ve done!

Everyone has a soulmate. 

It's not a notable deal. Though it's something many people cherish and look forward to, it's just as much an ordinary fact as primary color mixing: that's just how the world works.

Blue and yellow mix correspond with each other to produce green; soulmate A and soulmate B each have tattoos to correspond with one another, completing either tattoo on the skin of their other half.

Marinette will be damned if she finds anyone to match her tattoo. She'd loved it as a child, sitting through boring classes with a pout and jittery knees so she could rush home and admire the strange tattoo that covered the length of her inner forearm.

But now, she couldn't find a single thing to be more ashamed about. 

Even as she moves halfway across the world from taunting bullies and mind-controlling sociopaths, the damage is done. 

Marinette Dupain-Cheng does not want a soulmate.

She does not want to disappoint, to never live up to her soulmates expectations, because, "Your soulmate wouldn't like those pigtails, Marinette." and, "How could someone want a bully like you?"

Marinette does not want to relive her lycée experience, covering her mark every chance she could get so that Lila Rossi wouldn't antagonize whoever was on the other end of her soul line.

She’d watch as other people’s—normal—soul marks started to glow, indicating the one thing soulmarks are responsible for. Marinette witnessed on the sidelines as everyone she knew and had learned to love and lose found their other half, and left her in the dark. Watching, seeing, but never to experience what it was like. To find your soulmate.

Her mark. A white rose hanging upside down at the epiphysis of her radius, petals spread wide against each other, some looked as though they were flowing freely in the air, and some looked as though they were stuck to one another.

A deep red liquid spurting out of the center, running down the limp rose and glazing its petals as it oozes from the center bottom and down the sides of her arm, creating for a unique, yet concerning mosaic upon her forearm.

"Is that blood?" They'd asked, some looking curious, and some looking downright disgusted at the mere sight of her mark. Something that was supposed to be naturally celebrated, not hated and sneered upon. They were convinced she'd be a menace to her soulmate, like soulmates were anything other than fate.

Marinette did not know if it was blood, obviously. There was no superior entity whispering to her at night, informing her of every single petal's weight in grams. Instead, it was easier to have a friend pick apart the dubious meaning of such a cryptic mark, unlike so many others, hers was not so simple.

Kagami, especially, had a great eye for these things. The meticulous thought that girl compartmentalizes for the sole topic is unbelievable at first glance. It's only when you see much more of her, do you understand why she even bothers with soulmarks.

"You wouldn't believe the meaning behind such marks, Marinette. It's only when you start to break the first barrier, do you know." Okay, so, Marinette had no such way with words as the world-class fencer, but she was pretty sure the girl was saying that marks represent people the way names represent their spices.

Salt, for example. You can just tell the flavor of salt by it’s damn name.

“You’re the epitome of innocence, Marinette,—“ Marinette begs to differ, she’s read fanfiction. “But it seems you’ve been hurt, aged more than what a white rose will represent for you. That’s where the blood paints over you, like a parasite.” Marinette furrows her eyebrows at Kagami, a reoccurring gesture that will give her wrinkles by the end of the year, she knows, but it’s Kagami.

They’re sitting in their apartment, high above the Gotham smog and litter they’ve learned to acquaint themselves with, and looking out over the city from their ratty second-hand couch.

—Because Marinette wants to live with someone who will break her finger and then call her stupid and put a cast on it for whatever reason, you feel?

Another twig, green leaves still growing out of it—though, probably not since the severance—blows by their window, spurred on by a lone gust and back down to the ground, plummeting to an unfortunately placed puddle on the pavement.

“Stop moping.” Marinette makes a face.

“I was not moping.”

“You were making that sad face you make when you see a puppy walking by itself on the street. You’re moping. Why?” Marinette huffs in annoyance, and turns to look at her friend, who’s already staring with an exasperated quirked eyebrow.

She flounders for words, making exuberant gestures with her hands as she tries not to look Kagami in the eye.

An audible exhale from the woman. “You’re worried about, what, your soulmate, for whatever reason?” 

Marinette looks down at her mark, it’s entrancing rose petals glowing brightly against her skin, almost alike to the glittery sheen of highlighter she so often brushes onto her cheekbones.

“It started glowing last night, Kagami.” Marinette worries her lip and continues to stare at the now pulsing, almost obnoxious glow of her rose, the red liquid that spurts from its center taking on a glamorous shine.

“That’s wonderful. Right?” Kagami adds, when she fails to find a response. 

It should be. She knows that. She should be joyous right now, jumping ecstatically and rejoicing at the fact that she might find her soulmate sooner than later, but the ever-impending doom of, ‘what if’ continuously pops up in her brain, muddling any chance of happiness she might’ve had.

Marinette’s psyche is aged. She’s been through things. A lot of things that most people haven’t been through. Deaths, loss of loved ones, reoccurring terrorist attacks, and so much more that puts a haunted look in her eye and a deep hunch in her shoulders. She couldn’t bear to see the look on her soulmate’s face.

Kagami seems to read her mind and makes a low noise in the back of her throat. “Let’s go to the zoo.” So spontaneous, it almost makes Marinette do a double take.

“You? Want to go to the zoo?” She stares at Kagami, the latter unwavering with a borderline determined look on her face that says, ‘Nope. No fighting me on this one.’

“Distraction.” Is all she says, and for once, Marinette agrees that, yes, maybe a distraction is in order.

The Gotham City Zoo proves to be a great distraction, in between the hippo exhibit and the jungle-themed building just for showcasing snakes, Marinette finds a rather warmth in her heart.

Marinette grins widely at the crocodiles lounging across various rocks, seemingly not a care in the world is thrown around in between her and the fenced crocodiles, and she harbors  a sort of piece standing alone. (Kagami had ditched her at the zebras for the lions.)

Distantly, she hears what sounds like two people fighting—or, bickering. 

“—over here, got bit by a crocodile.” An erupt of laughter from two different voices, one distinct with a low raspy laugh, and the other, who starts hacking nastily in the middle of it.

“Those cigarettes do not benefit you, Todd. This is not a laughable event.” A third voice juts in, and she has to turn her head, locate the source of whoever said that.

Three men, one looking younger than the other two, stand slightly to the right of her in front of the crocodile exhibit, the two older men seem to be laughing at the younger’s expense—how do you even get bitten by a crocodile? She decides to not judge. This is Gotham, after all.

And, oh.

The guy they seem to be laughing at has the brightest green eyes she’s ever seen. Ink black hair frames his face beautifully, as he sneers down at the other two. The stranger doesn’t seem to notice her stare, but it’s cut short anyway by the sudden immense throbbing of her forearm.

Marinette winces, and slowly pulls down her sleeve to see her soul mark is—

Finished. It’s glowing, glowing far more than it had been over the course of the past two days, glowing so much she can barely squint to see that buried deep in the middle of her rose, a pristine dagger.

Marinette’s eyes widen, and she can’t help but make an incoherent sound that fights its way up her throat.

A tap on her shoulder, and she turns around to see the boy she was shamelessly staring at is right in front of her, and, woah, he’s tall. Marinette cranes her head up to look at the boy who so quickly grabbed her attention.

He also has the prettiest blush on his face, his eyes darting in between her and his companions, who seem to be laughing even harder, and in the distance, she hears a crude nickname being thrown at him.

“Holy shit, Demon Brat actually has a soulmate—“ a sentence cut off by more wheezing laughter, so she turns her gaze back to the boy in front of her.

“I’m Damian, you’re...soulmate.” The last word comes out wonky, like he couldn’t believe his own words, but she understands. He’s staring at Marinette now, bright green gaze fixed so intently on her, and she can’t help but blush, herself.

“Marinette. I figured, actually, when my arm started to sting like a bitch.” She says, once her mouth finally aligns with her brain and she gets the courage to say something relevant to smart.

Damian cracks a small smile, and she finds herself following the gesture with her eyes. It’s a beautiful movement, one she can tell is foreign to him, a shame.

And she doesn’t feel jittery. More at peace, looking at the equally aged look deep in his eyes, and the mark right in the middle of her forearm, she can guess he’s been through a hell of a lot, maybe more than she has.

Marinette will spend a lifetime learning what lies behind his exterior, looking at him now.

She supposes this soulmate thing won’t be too hard, after all, even as the two men behind them keep bickering and laughing at their predicament in front of the crocodile exhibit.

[retroellie]

Hi there! Love your writing, especially all the tlou content is just *chefs kiss* If you take requests at the moment, can I ask for a Ellie x reader fic where they're on their way to Seattle and Ellie finds the reader pleasuring herself one evening, saying how they didn't think Ellie would be in the mood given everything, then Ellie makes sure the reader knows she is always in the mood for them ;) I have a soft spot for eager Ellie trying to prove herself when it comes to pleasing her partner, maybe she could ask the reader to sit on her face, maybe some thigh riding idk ^^'

Summary: Ellie gets insecure when walking in on reader pleasuring herself 

A/N: Thank you for the request <3 sorry it took so long i just had a lot of ideas ASHAS. Anyways, i started this saying Dom!ellie and than i was like hmmm i want Sub!ellie so i did both. Sorry it sucks but i wanted to get in out today, Happy Valentines day!!

Warnings: NSFW, Fingering, thigh riding 

Word count: 3.1K 

You were exhausted, blood stained your clothes and you somehow sprained your ankle. You didn’t mean to make her mad or sad or hurt, whatever she was feeling wasn’t your intention but the information coming out of her mouth was too much. You saw her breathe spores and the hoard, you were upset and she was upset. It was just a mess 

Ellie had stormed off, telling you she was just going to check to see if it was safe but you knew she was upset. So she left you there, frustrated, scared, and so fucking in love with her. Your body felt like it was on fire, you shouldn’t feel like that at this moment but you did. 

Seeing her, her arms, her lips, the way she was so protective of you and so bossy. It made you feel things, maybe it was the fact you hadn’t been touched in almost a month and the tension was building up but it wasn’t going to stop anytime soon. 

‘Just a quick get off and than go apologize to Ellie, I need this’ you whispered to yourself

You slid your backpack off before laying back. You shut your eyes, pictures flashed behind your eyelids. Times of you and Ellie, wrapped up in her sheets, her head between your thighs, her eyes boring into your hot skin. Your hand started at your neck before it slowly made its way to your jean button. 

Your hand slipper underneath your jeans, sliding it under your underwear. You didn’t hesitate in sliding two fingers in, wanting to get it over as fast as you possibly could. Someone seeing you like this would embarrass you for the rest of your life.

You let your mind go wild, all the quick fucks and long drawn out ones where Ellie did nothing but edge you for hours straight. She always knew how to push the right buttons, making you shake and squirm under her grasp.

Your mind settled on your 1 year anniversary, it opened you up to a whole world of pleasure. Ellie leads you to the bedroom to see a set up they did in cheesy romantic films. She laid you on the bed before kissing up your body, moans escaped your mouth and she basked in them.

You arched your back into your own fingers, grabbed at your own boobs. Your face heated up, it wasn’t much but it’s the own friction you felt in a long time.

‘You look so pretty baby, lemme hear those pretty moans’

Her voice echoed through your head, her silky voice she had on that day etched into your brain. You imagined her fingers instead of your own, imagining she was on top of you. Her hair felt soft in your hands, her touch cooled your flushed hot skin down.

You picked up the pace, working your fingers in and out of you. Your mind racing with thoughts of her, imagining her taste that will never leave your lips. Your toes curled, so close yet so far away. If you could just get out a weak orgasm, you’d be fine it would tide your over.

“I forgot how pretty you looked when you were like this.”

Your eyes shot open, ripping your hand out of your jeans. You almost fell off the couch you were sitting on. You looked up to the voice to see Ellie standing there, smirking down at you.

“Shit, don’t sneak up on me like that.” You breathed out, holding onto your beating heart.

She chuckled, playing with her fingers. Your face heated up more if that was possible, embarrassment coursing through your body. Your orgasm is long gone, your fingers still warm and your body still sweaty.

“Sorry. I heard your moaning, I thought you were hurt.” She said, her eyes never made contact with you.

There was an angry tension, you both were still upset and honestly you were even more upset because of the build up and not being able to finish. You sat back with your arms crossed, Ellie didn’t know what to say. To say you all sweaty with your hand working in and out of you didn’t excite her, she would be lying.

“You know I could’ve helped...” she said, eyes finally meeting your irritated ones.

“What?” You asked, sitting up and buttoning your jeans back up. 

She sighed, slowly making her way to the couch to plop next to you. She knew how she hasn’t been much of a help these last few weeks, she hasn’t touched you and she was so grateful you let her take her time. But everyone has a breaking point.

“You could’ve come to me and I could’ve helped get you off.” She elaborated.

As much as you wanted to, you didn’t want to rush her into anything, she was still mourning and she had nightmares. You didn’t want to put more pressure on her. You were completely fine with pleasuring yourself, you just didn't like being interrupted.

“Ellie, you don’t have too.” You started. “I don’t expect you to fuck me after all you’ve been through, I never want you to feel like you have too.”

You had good intentions yes, but she felt she couldn’t please you or you didn’t want to come to her. Ellie always wanted to make you feel good, she had a need for it but she has been distant and just not wanting to do it. The way she was feeling right now, seeing you like that made her feel something. The thought of pleasuring you made her hands shake.

“I can still make you feel good, I’m not going to freak out or anything.” Her voice was laced with a bit of sassiness, she didn’t mean for it to come out like that but she was frustrated

“I know you can ellie, you never fail too...” you paused, moving closer to her. “I just want you to be ready, i don’t want you going into it too fast, I’m completely okay with getting myself off.” You said, kissing her cheek. You kept your head on her shoulder. 

She was so lucky to have you, you were the best person she had ever known. After the joel situation you had been nothing but patient with her, letting her take her time. It took her a while to be able to kiss you again, she felt bad she made it out alive and she still blames herself so she felt she didn’t deserve to have the pleasure of kissing you. 

The way you looked pleasuring yourself, your chest bouncing up and down, the way you bit your lip, the way you moaned. She was ready, she wanted you. She put a hand on your thigh, sliding it up. 

“You wanna get yourself off?” She asked, the silky voice made a come back 

Her hand ran up your thigh, it was y’alls first time in a while so of course she was going to tease you. Make you beg and make you want her as much as she did you. You were clueless to what she was doing, your head on her shoulder still. 

“I mean i’m okay with doing so, if y...” Her hand had made its way all the way up, meeting your heat 

You gasped out, you were still sensitive from touching yourself. It sent hot tingles up your body, making you shiver. Your head perked up, watching her hand. She just chuckled out, moving her hand back to her own thigh. 

“Well, what are you waiting for.” She said, patting her thigh 

You knew what that meant all too well, the idea never failed to excite you. You gave her a smirk before throwing your legs over hers. You were straddling her, your arms rested on her shoulders and hers on your waist. You looked down at her and she looked up at you, this was the first time in forever where you both had such an intimate reaction with each other. 

“Are you sure?” You whispered. 

She nodded, giving your hips a quick squeeze before reaching up to kiss you. It was a quick peck, a reassurance that she wanted this. She pulled away, hand on your cheek lovingly. 

“Let me make you feel good.” She said, bringing her knee up to meet you. “Take what you need” 

You gasped at the sudden action, holding onto her shoulders for dear life. You smirked down at her once more, bringing her into a kiss. You moved your hips, rubbing your heat on her thigh. You were sensitive still and the roughness of your pants on you gave you a delicious burn. 

You deepened the kiss, pulling at her hair; moaning into her mouth. Your thrusts were sloppy, trying to get yourself off as best as you can. Her hands rubbed slow circles on your hips, watching as you tried so desperately to get yourself off. 

“Come on baby.” she whispered, you threw your head back as sparks of pleasure shot through your body. “You're gonna cum on my thigh, like a good little slut.” 

Her words sent more sparks, almost sending you off the edge. She moved her hands up to your chest, grabbing at your boobs. She noticed your hips becoming more frantic, moving at a fast rate. She knew that meant you were close so she snaked her hand up to your neck, just to push you over the edge. 

“You doing so great baby, look like a fucking goddess.” She said, watching you unravel. 

The pressure on your neck, the words she spoke, the burning of your thighs, it all overwhelmed you in the best way possible. You were thrown off the edge when she bumped her leg up, sending a wave of pleasure through you. You threw your head back, losing control of your hips; lost in the pleasure 

“That’s right babe, let go.” Ellie talked you through it, moving her hands back to your hips. 

She moved your hips along her thigh, coaxing you through your orgasm. Your body jerked violently, it was the first orgasm you’ve had in a while; it felt like a foreign feeling. She watched as you came down from your high, rubbing comforting circles on your hips.

“It’s okay baby, come back to me.” She encouraged your through it

Your body relaxed a bit, collapsing on her thigh. You let a sigh out as she pushed your hair from your face. She wanted to see you, post-orgasm, sweaty, and so fucking beautiful.

Your vision came back, seeing her give you a little smirk while staring at you. You gave her a small smile before pulling her into a kiss, grabbing at her hair once more.

Her hands made their way up to your hair, you both were grabbing at each other like it was your first time. Her hands in your hair made you feel calm for the first time in weeks, you were so touch deprived that you wanted more of her.

You were becoming more eager, your tongue made its way into her mouth and your hands twirled around in her hair roughly. She chuckled at your neediness before pushing you away gently.

“Someone's needy.” She laughed, dropping her hands back to your hips

You sat back in her lap, breathing hard. The sudden change in demeanor made you nervous, scared maybe you went too fast. The touch felt so nice, it was something you craved every time Ellie was around you and when you finally got it you couldn’t stop.

“I’m sorry...am I pushing it.” You asked, untangling your hands from her hair.

“No no, of course not. i want this.” She replied, giving you a small smirk before giving you a small kiss on your nose. “You're just going a little too fast. It's been a while and I can't keep up.” She joked 

You smirked at her, pecking her lips a few times. You ran a hand through her hair once more, watching as her eyes closed leaning into your touch. You knew the sudden touch was overwhelming her as well, she wanted to please you. 

“We can stop, I don't mind.” You stated 

She shook her head, bringing you closer to her. She reached up to kiss your neck softly. The feeling of it made you lightheaded. She laid you down slowly, kissing down your chest. She stopped at your boobs, grabbing the flesh. 

“I just wanna fuck you nice and slow that’s all.” She smirked, kissing down your body once more. 

She came back up, pulling at your shirt, hinting that she wanted it off. you obeyed, pulling your shirt off your body. The sight left her breathless, your boobs in the plain black bra you wore, your soft stomach, the sweat that glazed your body. It made her body tingle, she was in pure shock. 

You pulled on hers as well, she sat up on her knees to pull  her shirt over her head exposing her bruised body to you. It felt like you two were exploring each other's body for the first time, the wetness in your underwear grew. You sat up, grabbing her waist. You reached up to kiss her, impatient and wanting her. She bent down to meet your lips, slipping her tongue into your mouth. 

Your hands fumbled with her jeans button, trying to undo it but failing. She pulled at your hair, she was the one being needy now. You unbuttoned her jeans, immediately sticking your hand in her jeans. You rubbed her through her underwear, causing her to gasp.

She left tiny kisses along her bra, you let her grind her heat on your fingers; letting her adjust to the immense pleasure. You let her take her time with your fingers, you could feel her wetness grow through her underwear. Her moans grew, grabbing onto your shoulders for support; you decided now was a good time to put your hand in her underwear. 

You stuck two fingers in almost immediately, she almost lost her balance. Your fingers worked in and out of her, watching as her legs shook. Her mouth gaped open, her eyes rolled back, her chest rising and falling roughly. 

She was lost in her own pleasure, her body was basically frozen up; letting you fuck her with your fingers. You decided to lay her back because she was wobbling back and forth, you could swear she was going to fall and break her head open if you didn’t. 

She grabbed onto you, pulling you into a kiss. She grabbed at your boobs, sloppy massaging the flesh. She let out a moan when you brushed your thumb against her bundle of nerves, you smirked.

“K-keep doing that..” She moaned out, you continue working your hand on her 

She threw her head back, allowing you to kiss her neck. You sucked, bit and kissed her neck until there was nothing but purple love bites on it. She dug her nails into your back, leaving scars there for sure. You watched in admiration, watching as she took what you gave her so well. 

Her hands made their way to her own boobs, grabbing at them. You took that as a hint of what she wanted, you pulled her sports bra up and left soft kisses along the flesh. That’s exactly what she wanted, her moans got louder. Her hands grabbed at you again, making their way down your body. 

“I wanna... touch you.” She said, in between breaths. 

You nodded, moving your hand down to your jeans. You pulled them off with your hand still on her. She watched as you did so, staring at your cloth covered heat. She leaned up to push you back down with her, almost immediately pushing her hand down your pants. Her legs wrapped around your waist, pushing your fingers deeper into her. 

She worked her fingers in and out of you like you did her, the same pace; she wanted to come undone with you. Your lips messily moved together, bumping teeth and breathing heavily into each other's mouths. 

“Fuck, ellie...” You breathed out as her fingers pushed deeper into you. 

You both were moaning messes, hips thrusting together, sweat dripping down each other's bodies, moans coming together. She was so close, any change in pace or movement could send her off the edge. You were still so sensitive from your first orgasm that you were on the verge as well. 

“I wanna cum together...” She moaned out, you hummed out a response. 

You thrust your hips roughly, knowing she  wouldn’t last too long. You could feel your orgasm pick up, making the knot in your belly tighten. She couldn’t hold any longer, her orgasm ripped through her. She came with a loud moan, her walls contracted against your walls. It didn’t take you long to cum after that, a few more thrusts and the knot in your belly exploded. 

You collapsed on top of her, your bodies going limp from the pleasure. You stayed like that a bit, coming down from your earth shattering orgasms. You could hear ellies heart beat, it made you sleepy. She chuckled, causing you to pop your head up. 

“What?” You asked, giving her neck tiny kisses. 

“I just would never thought we would fuck in a movie theater.” She laughed out. 

You chuckled, giving her neck a couple more small kisses before moving off of her. You made yourself comfortable by her side, squeezing between her and the couch. 

“Really? That was in my bucket list.” You joked, interlocking your hands. “I just didn’t think I'd be at the top.” 

“Hey!” She shouted, looking over at you. “You didn’t get me a chance to top... you know i always top.” 

You giggled, looking over at her. At this moment it was only the two of you on the word. Right now you two weren’t chasing after Abby, you weren’t thinking of Joel, there were no nightmares; It was just you two laying there in an abandoned movie theater. She lifted her hand up to caress your face, watching as your mouth contorted into a smile. 

“Thank you...” She paused. “I really needed this.” 

“I’m glad you enjoyed it.” you said, giving her a kiss once more

You both laid there, exhausted  from the journey, the sex, and the 2 hours of sleep you were both running on. You both lazily cuddled up to each other, lulling to sleep by the quietness of the theater. 

“We should fuck in art museum next.” She joked. 

“ooh, that’d be hot. All the weird art watching us.” You joked back

“Why are we like this??” 

-

-

-

(Credits to gif owner)

[amazingphanisnotonfire-imagines]

Cheryl//this is me trying

Request: Can I request a season 1 cheryl x reader. Cheryl always protects reader from people and r is shy but falls in love with the redhead and some who’s accidentally tells her while she’s having a bad day but cheryl is quick to reassure her then they cuddle after going to pops or something and it’s just fluffy.

hey! happy valentines day gays! and get you, two imagines in one day, it must be the day of love. i hope you all like this because it’s really fluffy and i enjoyed writing this a lot!

Overnight, Riverdale became a shell of its former self. Two months since Kevin Keller and Moose Mason stumbled upon the body of Jason Blossom, and nobody has been the same since. 

The town is riddled with secrets, they’re slowly destroying it like a disease. Nobody trusts anybody anymore, everyone is on high alert, and everyone is a suspect. 

Cheryl usually loves being the centre of attention, she has done ever she was a kid. It’s something that comes naturally with being a twin, you share everything and as much as she loves loved the shared birthdays and friends, she has always loved being the centre of attention.

Now however, she hates it. Her life is a true crime documentary at the minute, and all she wants is for the killer to be caught so the crew can pack up and leave and she no longer has to stare down at the blinding lights being cast over her and her family. 

The only thing that’s kept her sane over the past two months, is you. Despite everything happening, despite the murder and the secrets and the suspicion, you’ve stuck by her side. You were with her when they found the body, and you haven’t really left since. 

The two of you are unlikely friends, she’s Cheryl. Bright and bold and never one to back down from confrontation. But you’re Y/n, sweet and shy and always the first to shrink away from any sort of attention directed at you. 

She knows you hate the constant attention recently, it’s something you get used when you’re best friends with the victim’s sister, but not once have you complained. 

You’ve being questioned by police, journalists and strangers on the internet. You’ve had camera’s shoved in your face on your walk back from school and been asked countless questions about what you know about the Blossom’s. And you’ve also been offered ridiculous amounts of money in order to talk. But no matter what happens, you always just rush past them and join Cheryl, who’s always waiting for you with a sad smile and warm hand. 

Due to the constant hoard of vultures swarming Riverdale High, the two of you had to figure out somewhere else to meet after school so you could walk the long way home. It adds twenty minutes to your walk, but it’s not that well known around town, meaning people can’t bother you. 

Plus, the extra twenty minutes that you get to spend with Cheryl isn’t the worst thing. It’s the opposite in fact. It’s the thing you look forward to, even if you are looking over your shoulder every so often 

But today you’re not at your meeting spot. 

When Cheryl pushes her way through the stares of her fellow students with you and only you on her mind and makes her way through the school basement, back up the stairs and out of the fire exit, you’re not waiting for her with a smile that makes her feel warm and a cold slice of pizza you snuck out of the cafe earlier. 

The only thing waiting for her is a full bin and an empty field. 

“Y/n?” She calls out and looks around the corner. She’s met with three seniors, all of which are smoking with absolutely no care for being caught. 

“She’s not here.” One of them says, her blonde hair and large glasses cover half of her face and Cheryl forces a smile. 

“Hey, Blossom.” A boy says and Cheryl freezes. Who knows what they want, but whatever it is, it probably won’t be nice. It’ll probably be something along the lines of ‘hey, did you kill your brother’ and no matter how many times she’s asked that, it doesn’t get any easier. “Maybe try the bleachers.” He says, ending his sentence with a sympathetic smile and Cheryl nods slowly, not really sure what to say. 

“Thanks.” She forces and spins on her heel. 

“We’re sorry about your brother, Cheryl.” The blonde one says and she turns around again. Each of them look sad, with matching frowns and sorrow swimming in their eyes. 

Jason meant the world to Cheryl, but he also meant a hell of a lot to other people too. And that’s when it hits her. Of course you’re at the bleachers. 

For some bizarre reason, only known by your father. You and your family used to come along every other week to watch the Bulldogs play. For a while you thought it was because your dad was trying to get you and your brother into football and this was a lot cheaper than the actual game, but the older you got the more you figured it was because he was just trying to relive his youth. For 90 minutes he could pretend that he was quarterback again and for those 90 minutes your dad would be the happiest he’d been all week. 

Then one week, a redhead sat beside you. In clothes that were far too expensive to be worn to a high school football game. Her parents looked like they wanted to be there as much as she did, but then a boy with matching red hair ran out on to the pitch and you’d never seen a smile quite like it. 

After that, you made sure to sit beside her at every game. And then one day she sat opposite you at lunch. The first few times she was alone, but then soon she began to appear with a group of other girls, but you were the only one she’d talk to. 

Eventually lunch times and football games turned into group projects and sleepovers. You spend hours braiding her hair and listening to her tell you stories of other worlds and the creatures that live in them. You’d sneak down the dark and creepy halls of Thornhill in hopes of finding a midnight snack, and instead be met by Jason and your older brother in clown masks. 

Eventually, you found a different way to get to the kitchen, one that Jason didn’t know about. And when he’d come looking for you, both of you would jump out  and chase him around the house, much to the dismay of Penelope and Clifford. 

Those bleachers are what started a whole friendship, not only between you and her, but also you and Jason. When you’re brother eventually made the team, thanks to a good word put in my Jason, despite him being a year younger. Him and Jason became as inseparable as you and Cheryl and so it wasn’t an uncommon occurrence to see the four of you hanging out. It also meant that if Cheryl was busy, you and Jason would hang out until she finished whatever she was doing. 

Grief is a hell of a lonely thing, and sometimes Cheryl forgets that other people miss Jason too. With everything going on, she didn’t even think about how you were doing. With all the questions, accusations and crying that constantly fills Cheryl’s house. She never even asked how you were. 

And now her legs can’t carry her quick enough to were she hopes your sat. Because she’s already lost her brother, she can’t lose you too. She wobbles as her heels dig into the dirt, kicking up dust and mud as she runs across the field. Her hair swings behind her, and she can feel the red scrunchie loosen the quicker she runs. 

The bleachers have all sorts carved into them. Initials in hearts, some of them still there, some of them crossed out so aggressively that it’s a miracle they didn’t chop it in half. There’s inside jokes and ridiculous rumours. Codes and dates and everything in between. 

But something new has been added in the past few days. 

cheryl murdered jason

and y/n helped

The writing is small and barely legible, but it’s there and the more you run your fingers over it the more it carves itself into your heart. 

“Y/n?” Cheryl pants breathlessly and you quickly pull yourself away from it. Instead you stand up properly and pull the sleeves of your sweater down over your hands. The y/f/c scrunchie remains still in your hair and Cheryl has to stare at it for a few seconds to calm herself down. “You weren’t at our spot.” She says quietly and you close your eyes. 

You let her down. You let her down. You always let her down.  

“Sorry Cheryl.” You sigh and sit down in the dirt. Cheryl looks around before sitting beside you. “I just wanted some space.” You add and force yourself to look at her. 

The sun sits behind her, but even that doesn’t seem as bright as it used to be. Nothing is what it used to be. For the past two months, you’ve been told that thats a good thing. But what’s good about someone you loved being dead. What’s good about watching someone else you love go through life but not really live. 

Cheryl just exists. 

But she exists for you. 

Because as lost as she would be without you, she knows you would be just as lost without her. 

It’s an unspoken rule now, you always text each other when you wake up and before you go to sleep. It’s something you used to do anyway, but now you make a point not to forget. Because forgetting means that the worst could have happened, and that’s something neither of you can bare to deal with. 

“I get it.” She nods. “I was just worried that’s all.” She adds, trying to sound as casual as she can. But on the inside she’s screaming. Because she thought you had died, she thought whoever had killed Jason had gotten to you too, and the whole reason you’re both dead is because she wronged the wrong person. 

There’s a lot of people that don’t like Cheryl, being unliked comes naturally to her. But she doesn’t know how she’ll cope if she’s so unlikeable someone she loves died. 

She has no idea why your friends with her to be honest. She saw you staring at her at a football game once. But it wasn’t a stare she was used to. It wasn’t cold like her mothers or jealous like her friends. No, this was nice. You were staring at her like you wanted to know about her, like when you looked at her, you saw a friend not someone to be feared. 

And so Cheryl clung onto the tiny hint of friendship, the crack of a door into something that could happen, and she shoved herself through it. It worked, and now you’re the only person she’s nice to. She’s mean to everyone else, she calls them names and teases them, especially when they’re rude to you...but you stay. And she has no idea why, but she’s not going to wish it away. 

“Shit, sorry Cheryl.” You drop your head into your hands and Cheryl looks at you confused. She looks around, not really sure of what to do. “I didn’t think, God knows what you thought had happened.” You ramble and she realizes you’re crying. Her eyes widen and you look at her, your eyes red and puffed and your lips pulls into frown. 

“It’s okay.” She replies and wraps her arms around you. You bury your head into her neck, the smell of maple and cherries invade your senses and you let out a shaky breath. 

It smells like home and happier times, and you want to crawl into those happy memories and never come back out. “I was just being ridiculous.” She tries to play it off, to make it seem like she couldn’t feel her heartbeat in her throat and the ringing in her ears. Pretend like it didn’t feel like someone had pulled her heart out and stamped on it. 

“No, no you weren’t. I’m really sorry.” You sob and wrap your arms around her. She falls into your neck, surprised but not upset with how tight you’re holding her. She never wants you to let go. But of course she has to, and so however reluctant, she untangles herself from you and lets out a deep sigh. 

“I’m sorry.” You sniffle. She hands you a tissue and you wipe your eyes with it before scrunching it up in your hand. “I’ve just had a rubbish day. Somebody shoved this in my locker.” You frown and pull a balled up piece of paper out of your pocket. 

Cheryl’s eyebrows knit in confusion as she takes it from you, her fingers graze yours and you freeze for a few seconds. 

who do you think did it? 

cheryl __

y/n __

Jamie __

“Why is your brother on here?” Cheryl asks, her voice rising with each word and you rest your hand on top of hers to calm her down. 

“I dunno.” You shrug. “Your parents are on there too.” You add and point further down the page. 

“What a bunch of dicks.” She grumbles and crumples it up. “Do you know who it was?” You shrug and she sighs. 

“I’ve just gotten tired of the staring and the whispers. So I thought I’d just have five minutes peace before going home and having to listen to Jamie cry in his room but pretend he’s okay. Or for my parents to walk on eggshells around both of us. Neither of them know what to say, and because of that they keep saying the wrong thing.” You ramble and she listens intently, trying her best to find a resolution to all of your problems. 

Unfortunately, she doesn’t know the answer to everything, no matter what her mom says. 

“I just thought five minutes by myself can’t be terrible. But then I came down here and someone carve-well it doesn’t matter what they wrote. What matters is that I made you worry at the worst possible time in your life. I hurt you, and I’m really sorry. Believe me, hurting you is the last thing I want to do you. I feel sick even just thinking about it. I never, ever want to hurt you. I love you too much. I love you more that I’ve ever loved anything or anyone ever. I just love yo-” Your eyes widen when you realize what you’ve just admitted to. 

You don’t want to look at her, but she hasn’t said anything in a while and that’s strange for her. So you force yourself to look at her, expecting the worst. Expecting disgust, disappointment, betrayal. But it’s none of those. 

Instead she’s smiling. And she looks actually happy. Something you haven’t seen in so long, something you’re glad to see, despite the circumstances. 

Oh yeah, you’ve just told her you’re in love with her. What do you say after that? 

“I-er-”

“Y/n?” She cuts you off before you get the chance to ruin the moment. She’s known you for long enough to know that when you get nervous, you ramble and when you ramble you say weird things. 

You’re grateful for her cutting you off, usually if she talks over you, it annoys the hell out of you. But this time it’s welcomed and she stifles a small laugh and the sigh of relief you let out. 

But the next thing she says is something that you weren’t expecting, but you’re sure as hell grateful for. 

“Would you like to go on a date?” 

---

The red lights from outside, illuminate Cheryl’s pale face in the night, painting her in a reddish hue and you find yourself staring at her for far longer than would be considered normal. 

Lucky for you, she hasn’t noticed. She doesn’t seem to be paying attention to anything, not really anyway. Instead she stares down at her food, pushing a few fries around the plate and anxiety rises in your chest. 

She’s already regretting doing this. She’s made a mistake and now she doesn’t know how to let you down gently. 

She seems to sense you nerves because she’s looking at you quickly, a sad smile twitching at her lips.

“Sorry, I just. Jason always used to tease me about the two of us. It’s the only thing we’d take about sometimes. He’d constantly ask me if I’d asked you out yet. And every time I would say ‘no, we’re just friends’ but, well neither of us really believed that.” She says, a small laugh escapes her lips near the end, but she quickly shuts it off. It’s too soon for her to be laughing, too soon for her to be happy. 

“Yeah.” You nod and finish your drink. “He used to tease me too. ‘if you don’t tell her, I’ll do it myself’.” You mimic his voice and a ghost of a smile twitches at her lips as she forces herself to look at you. “I am really glad you did ask me though.” Your voice shakes a little with nerves and Cheryl stares at you confused. “I do really like you Cheryl.” 

“I really like you too.” She smiles softly and you stare at her lips. Sometimes you think the red lipstick has permanently stained her lips cherry red. Even when you guys are a sleepover, she still has bright red lips and the other part of you wonders if that’s just what they look like. 

“Hey.” You start and a sly smile twitches at your lips as you remember an old memory. She leans forward, excited to know what you’re smiling about. 

It could literally be anything, from a musty old book she let you borrow from the Thornhill archive, to a new tv show you started to watch. But whatever it is, she’s excited to hear you talk about it. 

“Can you remember last year. It was Jamie’s 16th birthday and you and Jason were invited over. Jason was there because him and Jamie were planning on sneaking out later that night, and you tagged along so you could keep me company.” You start and she smiles at the memory. 

The four of you sat in the living room, while your mom brought cake and your dad sang ‘happy birthday’. Cheryl remembers how happy she was, and she remembers talking to Jason afterwards, the two of them whispering and wondering if that was what a normal family was supposed to look like. 

You, Cheryl and Jason had each pitched in for the record player he wanted. And even though you all knew that just Cheryl alone could have been able to buy him it if she really wanted, you knew they split it for you. 

Jamie was ecstatic when he opened the box, and then all of the records you’d bought to go with it. He’d played it every single day since getting it, but now you haven’t heard it in months.

“Yeah.” She nods, a sad smiling taking over he face. “Can you remember when Jason pushed his face into the cake.” She adds making you snort a laugh. 

The bell above Pop’s rings and Betty and Archie walk in. They send you a sympathetic smile before sitting at their own booth, and you and Cheryl share a look. 

“Would you like another one?” You point at her milkshake and she nods, smiling shyly. 

---

The walk home is over far too soon, and it’s only when you’re standing on your porch do you realize you took the normal way home by accident. Either the media has gone to sleep, or people are starting to forget about Jason and Riverdale. 

That thought makes you frown and Cheryl watches your expression falter before you look back at her again. 

“Thank you for walking me home.” You smile shyly and a nervous laugh escapes her lips. 

“It’s no problem.” She shrugs and the two of you stare at each other for a few seconds longer than normal. She’s about to leave when you grab her hand and spin her around to face you. 

She’s surprised for a second, until suddenly she feels a pair of lips on hers, and then the only thing she can feel is them. Everything else disappears, and though the kiss is short and a little awkward, it’s still perfect. 

“Would you like to come in?” You ask and motion your head to large wooden door. The pain is chipped around the metal numbers, something your mom has nagged your dad about for the past 6 months. “We still have the rest of y/f/s to watch.” 

“I’d love to.” She nods and the two of you grin at each other. “But seriously, how many times have you seen that now?” 

“It doesn’t matter how many times I’ve seen it.” You unlock the front door, giving it a quick kick before you stumble through it. “What matters is that this is the first time you’re seeing it.” You add and she rolls her eyes but follows you up the stairs anyway. 

The sun sets over another day in Riverdale and darkness floods the town. The streets are cold and scary, but wrapped in your duvet and Cheryl’s arms, you’ve never felt warmer. 

[sugako]

c+k: osamu

osamu x f!reader

sum: a fun at-home dinner date with Osamu for the lovely holiday

cw: 18+ minors dni, nsfw, smut, fluff, mentions of food/eating, unprotected sex/creampie, toy use, mild degradation, rough sex, slight size kink

wc: 1.5k

a/n: part of confessions + kisses.....got a little carried away with plot so it’s not quite as short as the others whoopsie

"Do you remember when you confessed to me?" Osamu's soft whisper fanned hot air into your ear just as you began to stir. 

"Happy Valentine's Day to you, too. Mmmh, course I do, 'samu. Why?" You arched against him, stretching the sleepy ache from your body, then slowly turned over toward him. "It was pretty embarrassing." 

"It was cute." He purred, pressing a kiss to your forehead. "You were so nervous, I thought you were gonna pass out." 

"I-...is that why you gave me food?" Feeling more awake with the realization, you perked up a little. 

"Maybe," he wrapped his arms around your waist and laid backing, pulling you on top of his plush chest. "I also didn't want to waste those leftovers." 

…..

You straightened your cute, flouncy dress out in the mirror for the third time. It was silly, getting excited about a little at home dinner date, but you couldn't help it. 

Osamu had been working on dinner and dessert for hours. You found it hard to believe when he told you that wasn't your present. Although you were well aware his own cooking was just as much a present to himself. 

Carefully, you hoisted up the hefty present, wrapped up in cute paper. A heavy duty, beautiful wooden cutting board he had been eyeing for months. Tucked inside the silly, sweet card was a small stack of risque film prints of yourself. Presents for Osamu could be a difficult search, but you felt confident this time. 

Just as you shuffled into the kitchen, he was setting the table. 

"Gifts already?" He smirked and took the box and card from you. As he sat he began peeling the wrapping paper back carefully. His normally calm face lit up when he saw just a corner of the box and his steady fingers worked a little quicker to tear the paper away. "I love you." He set the box on the floor beside him. 

With a prideful beam, you nearly bounced in your seat as he opened the card. Once again, his expression changed, but in a different way this time. 

"Do you like them?" You basically whispered as he leafed through the photos. Though excited, there was a little pit of nervousness in the bottom of your stomach. 

“Do I-... They’re very, very nice.” He answered breathily before clearing his throat. “I’ll give you yours after food, sound good?” 

You hadn’t wanted to seem so eager, but you were honestly more excited for the cooling food than whatever gift he had gotten. He, on the other hand, was salivating a little bit more over the pictures of you than the food. If he gave you the silly, little gift he had gotten - which he now felt was stupid in light of your very thoughtful presents - he wouldn’t even get to eat before dinner got cold. 

A soft smile graced his features through his bites as he watched you happily chew. Slowly, you both worked your way through the food, stopping every now and then to chat about anything and everything. Silence truly settled over you both after you had finished the last bite of dessert. Feeling full and warm and fuzzy, you gently laced your fingers through his over the table. 

“Gift time?” You finally asked. 

Osamu grinned lazily and reached under the table, keeping his hands laced with yours. He pushed the two small boxes toward you with an uneasy look on his face barely masked by his expression. You took them as soon as they touched your fingertips.

Your other hand slipped out of his and made quick work of unwrapping the first box - fancy, gourmet chocolates from a small business. The next box was a little more difficult. All extra taped up just to make you work for it. At last, you revealed a chunky, black box. Your eyes slowly widened as you lifted the lid. 

“This feels a little rude in comparison.” He chuckled, watching carefully as you slowly lifed out the vibrator. It was heftier and definitely better well-made than any toy you had owned before. 

“I think it’s perfectly fine. Better than fine.”

“C’mere.” He groaned, reaching out for you. Setting the toy back into its box, you quickly rounded the table to sit against his lap, lips connecting the instant you landed. He held you there with one strong hand gripping your thigh. 

“Might… have to… test it,” you panted between sloppy kisses and reached behind you to grab the vibrator. His fingers dug into your skin. 

“Oh yeah?” A sly glint crept into his pretty eyes. 

He stood, dragging you with him as if to go toward your bedroom, but stopping short when you whimpered at the ache from his tight grip. Strong arms spun you against the nearest edge of counter and tore the toy out of your hand. One of his muscled thighs pressed against the back of your ass, forcing your front to dig against the countertop. 

“Knew you would be impatient, so I went ahead and checked everything, cleaned it too. Even though it’s going into your filthy cunt in a few seconds.” He growled into your ear and flipped the bottom of your dress over your ass. 

You wiggled your hips just enough for him to get a peek of your cutest panties as you bent the rest of the way over the counter. The chill against your cheek was enough to make you shiver, but his roughened hands smoothing over the slope of your ass warmed your core. 

“I’m surprised you didn’t fuck me when you saw those pictures. You’re so easy to fluster, ‘samu.” You giggle as he pulls your damp underwear down to your ankles, letting you kick them off. 

“Such a fucking tease. Can’t believe I thought you were so shy.” Taking a deep inhale, his hand came down to land a sharp blow against your backside. “But you’re really just a dumb slut.” 

The name made you whine and sigh, your legs spreading wider for him. The loud hum from the toy shocked you before he slid it against your folds. You weren’t sure what setting he had it turned to, but the instant, violent pressure against your clit was making you hump at nothing in nearly a minute. 

“Gonna cum already?” He asked, mockingly. 

“Ah! Uh-huh… gonna, uh, gonna cum, ‘samu!” You squeaked while Osamu rubbed the toy against you, letting you quickly find your release. Hips jitter and spark over nothing, twitching in the air like a feral animal. He decreased the intensity, but kept it pressed ever-so-lightly against your clit to help you ride out your high.

“Be a good girl and hold it for me?” He passed the toy between your legs and into your limp hand. “Want you to cum around my cock while I fuck you hard.” 

You nodded dumbly, still catching your breath. Haphazardly, you managed to hold it against yourself, grimacing at how your cunt still throbbed and your clit ached for more. The only slow part about the rest of the night was when Osamu took the time to line himself up with your entrance before immediately ramming into you. 

The force nearly knocked the toy to the ground. Still, you held steadfast onto the little object, feeling his cock hit you deep and hard with every stroke. It wasn’t much, but you were beginning to come undone again. The way his thighs slapped the back of your ass and the toy were egging you on closer and closer to the spectacular finish line. 

His hands were holding you and himself steady by gripping onto your hips as leverage to fuck himself into you. He watched, panting and whining, at the way your pussy stretched around him, gushing out that beautiful cum that coated him completely. 

When your knees began to buckle, he held you up, barely able to tease since he felt himself getting so close as well. 

“Cumming again so soon?” He groaned, hoping you wouldn’t catch how strained his tone was. Your little hole was sucking him deep, pulsing and clenching at every harsh motion. 

Of course, he was right. You were too fucked out to respond or really hear him at that. The initial burn of the tight stretch long gone, all you could feel was engulfing ecstasy. His cock was perfectly molded inside of you, filling you to the brim. You could feel all of him and it was far too much. You crossed the finish line in a disjointed chorus of whines and moans and spasms. 

“C-cumming!” You cried out, but he already knew. He could barely move the way you clamped around him and yet he couldn’t stop. Really digging his hands into you now, he fucked himself over the edge, letting you milk him dry in your still pulsing cunt. You could feel the hot splash of his cum paint your insides and sighed, contentedly when his motions slowed and he held himself buried completely inside of you. 

Exhausted, you pulled the vibe away and turned it off. He slumped over your back, pressing his clothed chest completely against you, pinning you closer to the countertop. Between gasps for air, he snuck little kisses in against the exposed skin on the back of your neck. 

“Happy Valentine’s Day.” He sighed. 

[ofmermaidstories]

just finished The Widening Sky and- holy shit. Your world building sits high up there on my favorite things to read, if not at number one. Putting your writing prowess aside, it’s just- I adore how the ending (while gut wrenching in its gauzy-ness) can be interpreted different ways through how you set up the world like- **spoilers!!** yeah maybe reader does die, however, considering that they go into the sea during the festival for the maiden, Id like to think they’re blessed- that the reader Is Magic, and that they transform into a mer-person. But I love (and am therefore anguished) by that there’s the possibility Katsuki Is dead, because they did see those orange scales in the shark, and even though there was a sighting of scales in the ocean, I mean- obviously there’s more than one orange scaled big fish out there. Though I think he’s alive. Idk I feel silly digressing to you about your own fic but I can’t help it!! It’s gorgeous and though neat endings are always nice (I read my fair share of angst with happy ending) it was so cool how possibilities are left open and how it’s settled and wrapped up neat without a conclusion?? If that makes sense. Idk!! Also I found it interesting how sero perceived us as partners, that little shift at the end was nice!!

Hi!! Hi!!! Oh my gosh, please, I don’t think I could name anyone on this platform that wouldn’t love a chance to waffle on about the things they make with others!!!!

Okay, so this is going to involve spoilers but have you ever read/watched Picnic at Hanging Rock? The movie came out in 1975 and is pretty much a cornerstone of Australian cinematography but it’s based on the novel of the same name. I know screenshots from the 1975 movie will sometimes float around tumblr—mostly of the picnic montage at the beginning of the film when the girls of Appleyard’s College are toasting to Saint Valentines—but the basic premise of the story is, on Valentines day in 1900, a group of school girls (accompanied by two of their teachers) from a Victorian boarding school for wealthy young ladies go on a picnic to Hanging Rock—and four of them go missing.

The story is all about the question of what happened to those girls (and their one teacher). It drives the remaining characters crazy—effects the lives of everyone left behind, and at the end of the story we don’t really get answers. Joan Lindsay, the author, even says in the beginning of the book that the solving of the mystery is unimportant.

But the thing is—there is an answer to Picnic at Hanging Rock. Joan wrote one, in a different version of the final chapter in one of her first drafts—where what happened to the missing girls is revealed.

I’m just gonna say it—the explained, original ending is bonkers LOL. Kudos to whatever editor managed to talk Joan off of that ledge because there is no way Picnic would have achieved the Australian Classic title it’s been given since if we’d been subjected to it. But!!! The reason I’m bringing it up is because I think Picnic works like it does because it was written with that ending in mind, even if ultimately the audience was never meant to be privy to it. And that’s how I (kinda) feel about Widening!!! I wrote it with one intended ending in mind, even knowing that the final hook (pardon the pun…?) would be that it was left ambiguous (hopefully, anyways, LOL). Idk… I guess I just thought it fit in with the idea of the island’s—the water’s—magic, and how much someone reading it wanted a happy ending (or not). It’d take a lot to take down our merman though, I reckon. 💪🏽

(Poor Sero—I like to think he was well and truly on his way to being in love, before the festival. Maybe if Reader hadn’t of been the kind of person to hold out hope, for something so far fetched—they could’ve eventually been happy)

anyways!!! i really waffled on with this one!!!!! i hope the week ahead is kind, Anon. Here’s to always holding out hope, regardless of what we find in some shark’s stomach. 🦈🌤🌊

[mgsheadcanons]

(Nobody asked for this, but I decided to make a little gift for my followers🖤 I added some less popular characters, because.. Well, because I can:) )

Preference “How they spend Valentine’s day with you”:

Ocelot likes the idea of another one special day on which he can express his feelings to you. The day before Valentine’s day he acts like he forgot about the date, only to surprise you with coffee to bed, pink and white chrome balloons and confetti all over your shared place and present you a small gift. When you open the box you see a little necklace shaped as a rose gold horseshoe with tiny rubies. He tells you that he wants luck to follow you all along your way. Depending on your wish how to spend the day, he has two plans. If you prefer something energetic, he takes you on safari: you drive around, watch the wildlife in savanna, take pictures of beautiful landscapes and enjoy your joint activity. If you wish for something calm, Ocelot is ready to spend the day on the base, watching movies and cuddling, play some board or video games.

Don’t expect Big Boss to be off the beaten track and active in the questions of romance. He prefers to avoid too funny activities. Due to his lack of fantasy he sticks to a classical scheme: he invites you to a fancy restaurant. He also presents you a new beautiful dress, while he himself dresses in a tuxedo. When you reach the restaurant on a lux cab, you find out that the whole place is reserved just for the two of you: a big hall with high walls, white silk curtains and decorations. In the middle of the space there is a white fortepiano and a musician playing a slow and yet quiet music. The waiter takes your clothes away and another one brings out a huge rose bouquet. The rest of the evening you spend drinking wine, eating delicacies and listening to the pianist, playing only for you today.

Kaz finds nothing special about this day, but it will be fine by him if making a special occasion out of it makes you happy. If you are happy, he is happy as well. Cooking is one of his guilty pleasures, so he finds some nice recipes for you to cook together. You have much fun while hanging in the kitchen, and you also notice that he is more relaxed than usual which makes you smile internally: your joint activity is good for both of you. When you finish cooking, leaving the kitchen a little messy, according to his plan, he went to make the table and light up candles. As soon as you finally sit at the table, he pours your red wine and tells you some warm words about how happy he is to have you and what you mean to him. At the end of the day he makes a hot bath with flowers for you both.

As Venom Snake finds out that you want to have a special occasion on Valentine's Day, he will be stunned at first, not knowing how to react - why would you like to? Don’t you already know how he feels about you? He won’t argue with you, god no, but he will disappear for some time before coming back to you asking you to go with him. He guides you to the landing zone, where Pequod is already waiting for you, without explanation asking you to get in. You hear a quite strange sound and ask about it only to know that it was water. As you are getting closer, the sound is growing louder and then you see a giant waterfall. The helicopter landed on its top and Snake helped you to get out. He stands behind you cuddling you tightly with a chinon your shoulder. He doesn’t say anything but, as usual, he makes it all clear with his actions.

As Skull Face finds you desired to celebrate the Valentine’s Day, he will be annoyed at first, because he thinks it’s stupid, which is gonna upset you. The moment he feels how sad that made you feel, he softens and says that he doesn’t need a calendar or "damn" western traditions to show his love for you. He is an old school romantic, so you two take a jeep, put all needed things in it and he’ll take you to some beautiful place where the two of you can observe the landscapes, enjoying each other's loving embrace, eat your favourite cakes, have long discussions. He is sure to put his jacket on your shoulders, because you don’t move much and will get cold fast. When the sun is no longer high in the sky and the light is about to disappear, he gives you his arm, inviting you for a slow dance in the sunset.

When Psycho Mantis sees your controversial expression, he won’t be shy to read your mind to figure out what is upsetting you in order not to provoke even more negative emotions by asking about the problem. Once he understands what the matter, he will be the first to come to you and hug you properly, kissing your top of the head and asking if you would like to make some special plans for the day. He doesn’t feel great about public and overcrowded places, he would prefer it somewhere where you could have more privacy. If you tell that you want to stay at home and chill, he would be more than happy. He brings you a sea of sweets and biscuits and hot chocolate with marshmallow.Finally you two stay inside and watch TV, he doesn’t let you do anything or go to the kitchen for more hot water when you switch to tea, doing everything himself instead.

Liquid Snake will surprise you with his positive attitude to your idea of celebrating Valentine’s day. He hasn’t prepared you any special gift yet, but instead he offers you to go shopping. You liked the idea, so he takes you to one of the most famous and big shopping areas. You attend every shop you like, you try on outfits and show them Liquid , while he sits outside the fitting room and watches you closely with a pleased grin on his face. After you finished with the several shops, he couldn’t help but join you at searching for new outfits for himself too. You also visited a jewelry shop to get you a new necklace and earrings. If you want, you can have a ring too. Everything you wish for, Liquid buys you. As a final note he takes you to the restaurant to celebrate with champagne and nice dinner. He also presents you red roses when you areback home.

Raiden has a romantic side in him, so he will be glad to celebrate Valentine’s day with you. He asks you about your attitude towards this day and your mood in advance in order to understand how to plan everything properly. He wants it totally romantic like in classic romantic movies, so he orders a bouquet of white and red roses and turns on some tango music. He feels that he is not good at cooking, so he simply orders dinner. He wants it all to be perfect and you notice that he acts nervous, so you reassure him that you love the occasion he organized for you. And you were not hypocritical - you actually like it how he makes an effort to make you happy with him. After the dinner he asks you to go out with him and will show you the night sky, opening up for you about his dreams about far space and adventures, only to end up laughing together.

Monsoon’s a dick about all this Valentine’s stuff, just as about the majority of other issues, he will read you a lecture why the whole concept has no sense. But he will follow you whatever you come up with, because after all he does care about you, even if he doesn’t show it. He is grumpy about all your attempts to hug or kiss him, but he doesn’t stop you either. Knowing him, you decided to go for a walk to the park where you shouldn’t meet many people. As you walk through a lively alley, he slowly walks behind you, looking like a guardian with arms closed behind his back. Your safety is a priority for him, so it takes only his threatening smile to turn some annoying strangers away. When you reach a quiet part of the park, you try to take his hand, he doesn’t protest but instead puts his arm around you without saying any word of discontent and continues walking.

Jetstream Sam doesn’t take Valentine’s Day seriously but he doesn’t make a scene either. For him it’s just another reason to have fun and spend some together. He takes you to the secret place (he refuses to tell you where you go), only to surprise you with a trip to the amusement park. He takes you cotton candy, popcorn and drinks of acid colour. He’ll try to win you a big toy in a shooting gallery but will miss the limit and smile awkwardly, shrugging - he is a swordsman, not a shooter after all. Then you ride every attraction that you like. You also go to the horror house and if you are scared, Sam won’t take his hand away from you, keeping it on your waist and hugging you tighter when something makes noise next to you. At the end of the day you go to the big wheel - the most romantic part of the journey.