#he’s old yeller-ed out fucking back

[emeraldcreeper]

I liked trust the process of where the story is going before they martyred my guy point fucking blank man. Like I will still trust the narrative, I guess. I fucking suppose, but I won’t be happy about it if he’s not at minimum a ghost or something like the other deaths (minus Ivan but that was his actor not getting brought back for s2 for I don’t know if we even know why) have been like one off characters who were jokes or racist imperialist assholes, and Izzy’s not one of those, like he’s not the mentor he’s not been the mentor for decades, he’s the ex, at fucking best he’s the unrequited lover. He had the nice arc too if he didn’t have that I’d go okay yeah I get it he’s mildly gay coded and miserable he can have a pointless death or whatever and get old fucking yeller-ed. But this is a romantic fucking comedy, no one dies except when it’s a joke and I don’t think anyone thought that was a good one.

I am currently back burnering two wips to run a jokey he’s fine fic, so watch for that one I’m healing my own soul with it it’s hilarious, I am also gonna work on the wip I was sitting on till the season ended and rework my mildly connected sequel. Fucks sake, happened fucking twice now first I go aw man he got rid of his leathers, now it’s yay the leathers are intact I can use them for kink purposes he’s not chucked them again, but they did chuck Izzy and I was gonna (am gonna. He’s probably fine. Probably. He’s got buttons to save his ass. Probably.) steddy hands the s3 speculation of horny and emotional awareness

[manicdragondreamgirl]

I haven’t had chemistry since like 2008, and I’m also an idiot who likes to make my friends upset, so I rated the periodic table in order to tilt my friends:

Hydrogen - this is like your childhood friend who has always been with you more or less and always will be down to get a drink and chill even tho you haven’t spoken in years. Solid bro imo 7.5/10

Helium - always down for a good time, even if probably created Alvin and the Chipmunks which in some places is considered a war crime. 4/10

Lithium - Gives me bitchy vibes and is flammable as fuck if I remember. Skinny bitch with an attitude 3/10

Beryllium - idk this sounds like a sailor moon villain lol for that it can have a 6/10

Boron - more like BORONG amirite ha ha wait no seriously I have no idea lol 5/10 clean neutral rating

Carbon - *screaming* 2/10 I will not be taking questions

Nitrogen - cool cool cool tight tight tight 9/10 Nitrogen just is the cool hot chick you wish you were

Oxygen - kid who takes up all the glory for the group project even tho you did all the work, 4/10 for natural charisma

Fluorine - lol what are you knockoff chlorine lmfao bitch 3/10 reminds me of the dentist

Neon - I can vibe with this boy for his contributions to signs which cause my eyes to scream 8/10 modernized Art Deco thanks you

Sodium - 10/10 this is me and I won’t be taking questions next element

Magnesium - magnesium is a close relative of magnificent and therefore I think the case is closed folks 9/10

Aluminum - 10/10 for providing a home to my Diet Coke addiction I’d be dead without you

Silicon - 6.9/10 :smirk:

Phosphorous - This has a very soundly name and it’s welcome to do that but idk, not a fan, seems like he’d be smelly, 2/10

Sulfur - 1/10 pretty sure that dog farts are purely comprised of this and as such if I was leaving negative ratings I would

Chlorine - 7.8/10 for being in pools so we could swim without brain eating amoeba in the south you a champ

Argon - he seems like a nerd jk this guy has a good color 9/10 for just being himself

Potassium - I hate bananas and this word gives me the physical sensation of biting into one but only by thinking of abstract letters and making them into something which we can nutrientise from bananas and to me that shit is bananas, b a n a n a s — 3/10 for making me sing hollaback girl thru adhd word association

Calcium - hm my brain went to mega milk so you get a 2/10 today bud I don’t make the rules

Scandium - pretty sure this is fake lol what’s next faxdium, e-Mailite and copinium? 5/10

Titanium - this song’s a banger and also is the only thing that lets me wear earrings 10/10

Vanadium - if your erection lasts for longer than like idk it’s supposed to then don’t take vanadium wait what do you mean it’s not an ED treatment 4/10

Chromium - decent bloke shame the browser eats all your memory 5/10

Manganese - if a weeb tries to tell me how to pronounce mayonnaise one more time... 1/10

Iron - excellent tool against the fey, in your blood, what a bro, 10/10 this bitch slaps

Cobalt - has a powerful energy; I respect him. 8/10

Nickel - if I had a nickel for every time someone made this joke lol 5/10 he’s doing his best

Copper - taste bad 3/10

Zinc - isn’t that the dude in the green tunic and white tights who saves premcess Lelda or something lol 7/10 those games are good

Gallium - seems like a prick 4/10

Germanium - sounds like a child pronouncing geraniums which are superior 3/10

Arsenic - bad vibes coach 1/10

Selenium - isn’t this just sailor moon lol 10/10 love this bitch

Bromine - farmine wherever you aremine - 9/10 I love a good bro

Krypton - he’s okay I guess 5/10

Rubidium - yet another Steven universe villain who will be redeemed I imagine 4/10 seems a bit dull

Strontium - I feel nothing when I see this lad’s name and that seems like a shame 1/10 I don’t like it

Yttrium - this is an atrium in Yharnam, or something 8/10 would love to sit in one and make contact with higher beings

Zirconium - oh wait THIS is the sailor moon villain from the dead moon circus! 9/10 I enjoyed that arc

Niobium - seems sassy, I like that in an element 7/10

Molybdenum - I hate this one, rancid. 1/10 for making me have flashbacks to difficult Ancient Greek vocabulary there is no fucking way that sound combination is anything but Beta and Delta borking and then Latin being like oh imma steal that

Technetium - 6/10 decent name but seems a bit forced

Ruthenium - 5/10 kindly old lady element I guess lol

Rhodium - 10/10 this ain’t my first rhodium babee this lad has good vibes what a name what a king

Palladium - 10/10 for making me think of paladins

Silver - 12/10 I’m breaking the rules for this silver is the best it is so cool and also it is the other best tool for dealing with supernatural creatures when iron has failed you highly suggest Even if I am extremely allergic to it going into my ears...wait hold on

Cadmium - 2/10 sounds like a total douche

Indium - 8/10, i just think it’s independent and neat

Tin - 10/10 good ear sounds when involving rain and roof shapes and automatically reminds me of Nora Jones’s come away with me album which is also 10/10

Antimony - 7/10 decent protagonist good name all around seems rad

Tellurium - tell ur mom what? That’s so early 2010s league of legends humor bro 2.5/10

Iodine - strikes fear in my soul from having it poured on my wounds but this is why I have more pain tolerance than god 5.3/10

Xenon - I think this is a declension of Xena warrior princess which is a win in my eyes, 8/10

Caesium - kind of has a cunty Latin name, 4.5/10

Barium - yeah boss, bury’im! 7.5/10 I love a good mobster gag

Lanthanum - A bit pretentious on the Tolkien spectrum sorry bud 3/10 sounds like you’d be the dickwad elf everyone hates

Cerium - 6.5/10 I like this one, gives me a clean vibe

Praseodymium - the fuck who sneezed all their alphabet soup onto the paperwork and called it an element Christ we can’t keep doing this 1.5/10

Neodymium - oh my god what did I just say 1/10

Promethium - thank Christ we’re back to greek 9/10 Prometheus was a Chad I could get behind

Samarium - 5/10 gives me boring wizard vibes

Europium - 4.5/10 don’t rename opium chrissake can’t take these nerds anywhere

Gadolinium - 5/10 it’s a starship knockoff but it’s trying to be bold with the G sound

Terbium - 2/10 I don’t vibe with this one

Dysprosium - sounds like an antidepressant that has a lot of shitty side effects 3/10

Holmium - sounds like someone anxious asking their beloved to hold them 8/10 I like hurt/comfort fics

Erbium - you can’t just describe something as herby you daft bastard 2/10

Thulium - sounds like a spell I like it 8.5/10

Ytterbium - macguffin in a shite sci-fi show that gets highly overrated because BBC produced it and superwholock stans emerge and go utterly feral 1/10

Lutetium - bards are an element I agree 10/10

Hafnium - sounds like a river (my dog) sound and has a cute vibe, I’d offer it head pats 7/10

Tantalum - noooo you can’t be sad yuor so sexe haha 6.9/10 tantalizing

Tungsten - 10/10 this is a lad with history

Rhenium - 5.5/10 it’s ok

Osmium - 4/10 I wasn’t a big wizard of oz fan

Iridium - 9/10 sounds like iridescent and that’s in my top 10 favorite words and concepts

Platinum - 10/10 best Pokémon game

Gold - 7.9/10 all that glitters and all but it’s still pretty on some people, silver is better tho

Mercury - yikes 8/10 so it doesn’t kill me

Thallium - sounds like the brother character in a ps4 exclusive western rpg that oddly falls under the radar in terms of reviews and gets shafted at awards for no reason 7/10 I’ll support you tho

Lead - 2/10 that’s gonna be a no from me dawg pretty sure I still have lead in my hands from stabbing myself with my mechanical pencils

Bismuth - 6/10 sounds good in mouth and reminds me of biscuits for some reason, I’ll take it

Polonium - to thine own self be true so stop trying to act like the arts don’t influence science jk pretty sure this is named for Poland but hey that’s where we get the Witcher so you get a pass 6/10

Astatine - 1/10 I don’t even know what you are

Radon - 7/10 this motherfucker knows his shit and how to party, rad is right

Francium - I bring you francium...and I bring you myrdurdium... 7/10 for a good vine

Radium - killed the video star probably 9/10 I can get behind her

Actinium - as opposed to passtinium I prefer actinium in the voice of writing 8/10

Thorium - overrated Norse god 5/10 because lightning is still cool

Protactinum - sounds like some pretentious condom brand 4/10 wouldn’t do it with a dude who bought these

Uranium - I always thought she was a hot sailor scout 10/10

Neptunium - same for her I knew they weren’t cousins you couldn’t lie to me 4kids 10/10

Plutonium - sounds like a macguffin unfortunately 5/10

Americium - I read this with a pivotal letter missing and nearly died, 7/10 for the laugh

Curium - 10/10 gives me Curie vibes and also reminds me of curiosity which reminds me of—[old yellered before the association could set in]

Berkelium - what I shout when I want Burke (fam dog) to slaughter innocents and raze territories 2/10 world was not meant to know his commands

Californium - 1/10 California is cool with geography but probs could stand to chill with the ego sorry to my friends in Cali

Einsteinium - 6/10 it’s alright but we’re really running out of ideas huh

Fermium - 3/10 this one is porny

Mendelevium - 1/10 my brain didn’t like parsing this and I stand by my earlier statement of running out of good names

Nobelium - 0/10 you didn’t name any noble gases this cowards this gas can’t be a noble oh wait it’s NOBEL I take it back 5/10 seems an alright chap

Lawrencium - fear the old blood my sorry dead hunter’s ass I’ll never get back my life from the hours I spent trying to beat this lava shitting bastard 2/10 for being a boss who eats Taco Bell specifically before being challenged to have fresh lava shit with which to punish you for having the audacity to exist in his space

Rutherfordium - my god what a snob 4.2/10 I respect him a little but only because he sounds like a right lad

Dubnium - DROP THE BASS 10/10

Seoborgium - not sure about this one but it can have a 7/10

Bohrium - as an American English speaker this sound combination makes my pathetic throat become a black hole as I try to properly create the sound of it 10/10 I love when my body becomes a massive void in the universe

Hassium - lazy 2/10

Elements 109-118 can go fuck themselves I hate them all, collective 6.66/10 for their general demonic vibe

[stardust-walker]

High Hopes: Chapter 7

Previous Chapters: 1 2 3 4 5 6

word count: 2772

___________________________________________________________

Dove sat awake and stared out the window of the RV. Her body was tired and her legs ached from the trek back from Atlanta, but she couldn’t close her eyes without seeing her friends, even those who were alive, die right in front of her. Sophia was asleep, her legs thrown across Dove’s lap as she rested her head on her mother. Carol had cried herself to sleep.

Then, in what seemed like the blink of an eye, the sun was rising over the mountains. Her hazel eyes scanned her surroundings as she straightened herself into a sitting position from where she had apparently fallen asleep. Lori smiled gently at her as she patted her on the shoulder again. It was her that had woken her up. “How long was I asleep for,” Dove mumbled as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes.

“Not long. Maybe an hour or so,” Lori sighed as she sat down next to her. “How’re they doin?”

Dove turned her head to look at the older woman as she scrutinized her for a moment before she responded. “Fine, I think. At least someone’s getting some shut eye. How’s Carl?” Dove ran a hand through her hair as she fought back a yawn.

 “He’s still sleepin. Glenn was lookin for you, but he didn’t want to wake you,” Lori added.

Dove nodded as she moved Sophia’s legs off her lap slowly. Lori took a step back and held out a hand to the younger woman. With a mumbled ‘thanks’, Dove allowed herself to be helped into a standing position. As she descended the steps, she spotted Glenn. He was close to the woods with Daryl of all people. Close to where Carol’s tent was and that made Dove’s stomach turn. Lori rubbed her shoulder before she turned on her heel and walked off to check on Carl.

It felt like the 20 or so steps it took to get to Glenn took hours. Her hands on her hips, Dove looked at both the men and nodded. “So, what’s up? Couldn’t come wake me up yourself?” She attempted to joke with Glenn.

His face was paler than she thought she’d seen him before. “No…. I mean. I didn’t want to wake you up for this.”

The confusion must have been clear on Dove’s face as Daryl spoke up suddenly. “We gotta let your sister know what happened and pizza boy here thought it would be best to let you know first”

Dove didn’t know how to feel. That could only mean one thing, right? She pushed past both of them and pulled open the flap of the tent. A sense of regret immediately washed over her as she took in the sight before her. She never thought she would feel any sense of pity for Ed Peletier, but here she stood. He still deserved everything he got and when Dove finally tore her eyes away, she had no tears in her eyes. Instead she turned to Glenn and whispered in his ear. “Do me a favor? Wake Carol up and bring her out here? Leave Sophia to sleep, she doesn’t need to know yet.

Glenn eyed her warily for a moment before setting off to his task. She watched as he disappeared into the RV. Dove finally spoke up again, “You want help movin him? You’re gonna put all the ones out that got bit, right?” She peeled her eyes away from the sight of her sister crying and being comforted by Jacqui to look at Daryl.

Shock was evident on his face, but only for a moment as he frowned once again. “Sure you can handle it?”

Dove narrowed her eyes at him, “I don’t see anyone else offering to help you with this one, Dixon. Besides, I probably should. You get his arms, I’ll get his legs,” and before there was a response, Dove had ducked her head into the tent and began to get a grip on her brother-in-law’s legs. Her stomach turned as another thought rushed through her head. She only wished she was the one who got to put an end to all the suffering he’d put her family through.

~

A few hours later, the sun was up. Most of them sat around the fire as Daryl, T-Dog, and Glenn went to work putting the walkers-to-be down before they could turn. Rick broke the silence. “She been like that all night?”

Lori nodded as Dove looked up from her spot next to Carol. “She won’t even talk to us. She hasn’t moved at all.”

Shane sighed, “We can’t just leave Amy like that. We have to deal with it…like with all the others.”

“I’ll tell her how it is,” Rick nodded solemnly.

Dove shook her head as she rubbed Carol’s back. “I doubt hearing it from one more person will make a difference.” She was proven right almost instantly as she turned to see Andrea pull a gun on Rick. Jesus, it was turning into Lord of the Flies quick as anything. Then Rick did the smartest thing any of them had done in days, he backed up slowly and walked away.

Daryl had seen it too, apparently, and he wasn’t too happy about it.

“You’re seriously gonna let that girl hamstring us? The dead girl’s a fucking time bomb,” he said in what had to be an attempt to reason with them all.

Dove stood; arms crossed in front of her chest. “First of all, it’s Amy. Not dead girl. Second of all, when Rick went over to talk to her? He got a gun pulled on him so unless you have any bright ideas of your own, I think we’re shit out of luck,” she tried to keep her voice down as her anger rose slightly. The last thing they needed was for Andrea to hear their whole conversation.

Rick raised an eyebrow,” So any suggestions?”

Daryl took a step closer to Rick and Dove watched Shane tense up. “Take the shot! Clean, in the brain from here! Hell, I can hit a turkey between the eyes from this distance.” She hated to say anything, but Daryl was kind of making sense. It hurt to even think it. Dove liked Amy. She was a sweet girl, always kind to everyone in camp even when they weren’t kind to her. But if she came back, that wouldn’t be Amy.

“For God’s sakes, let her be,” Lori shook her head. The others seemed to agree and Daryl just scoffed as he turned to go back to his work. Dove stared after him, a frown on her face.

“You got something to say, bird,” Shane spoke up suddenly. His voice cut through Dove like a knife. There was something off about him since Rick got back, almost like he was trying even harder to prove himself.

“What if Daryl’s right,” Dove said and almost instantly regretted it.

Dale frowned in concern, “Did you get any sleep last night? I mean you…”

Dove held a hand up and tried to ignore the worried look on Carol’s face. “No, Dale! I’m feeling just fine, thank you! But all I’m saying is that Amy go bit, right? So, Amy will turn if we let her sit there too long. So what? We let her lay out in the sun, get all toasty and warm for when she turns and then what? Andrea chokes up when she turns, can’t shoot her, then she gets bit.”

Lori ran a hand down her face and shook her head, “We aren’t shooting Amy in the head from this far away. I understand you; I really do! But we need to think about Andrea too.”

A shout from Glenn drew Dove’s attention. She grabbed Carol’s shoulder as Daryl started to yell again. Something about them leaving Merle for dead. “You had this coming!”

Dove’s hand shook with anger and Carol gave her hand a comforting squeeze before Dove caught sight of Jim. He didn’t look too well, and she couldn’t help but feel some concern for the man. Another pat on Carol’s shoulder and Dove mumbled, “I’ll be back,” then she was off. She approached slowly but was able to hear enough.

Jim was bleeding. Dove froze in place, her feet felt like they were cemented to the floor when Jacqui shouted out, “A walker got him! A walker bit Jim!”

Everyone was shouting. Dove’s head was spinning, but she saw Daryl start to circle like a shark with the damn pickaxe. Then Jim was caught in a hold by T-Dog and Dove couldn’t keep the tears from springing up in her eyes as she saw the big bite mark on Jim’s abdomen.

Dove shook her head as she raised a hand to cover her mouth in shock. Shane walked forward and grabbed Jim’s arm as the man continued to mutter how he was fine. He was okay, there was nothing wrong with him. “Hey, listen. Jim, buddy, just sit right there by the RV. Right there in the shade now, alright? We’re gonna figure this out.” Dove walked forward and placed a hand on Jim’s other arm and nodded at Shane.

“C’mon. I’ll help you sit down. You’re gonna be just fine,” her hazel eyes stayed fixed on her feet as she carefully guided the mechanic to the shade beside the RV. “Do you need anything? Something to eat? A bottle of water,” Dove spoke gently as she helped Jim sit down.

“I’m okay, Sawyer. I’m okay,” was all Jim said. It was like he was trying to convince himself or will it into existence by saying it so many times. If magic were real, maybe he would really be okay. The dead were up and walking now so who’s to say he wouldn’t be able to fix himself.

Dove nodded, a small smile on her face as she rose to her feet to rejoin the others. “Stay cool, Jimbo. I’ll be right back.”

She caught what Dale said as she approached, “Maybe Daryl’s right.”

“You sure you got enough sleep last night, Dale?” Dove couldn’t resist saying the same thing Dale had said to her earlier as she came to a stop between Carol and Daryl.

“Jim’s not some monster or a rabid dog. He’s sick. A sick man,” Rick shook his head. He wasn’t on board with this anymore. “We start down that road, where do we draw the line?”

Dove sighed as she pulled a hair tie from her pocket. As she grabbed her dark hair in her hand and began to weave it into a braid, she nodded. “Right, he only turns into a rabid dog after he bites the dust. He hasn’t done that yet. The real question is, are we gonna give him a chance to turn into a rabid dog? We’ve all seen Old Yeller.”

“Exactly,” Daryl spoke up again, “Line’s pretty clear. Zero tolerance for walkers or those to be.”

One thing that Dove was quickly figuring out about Rick Grimes was that he was a desperate man. Kind, sure, but desperate to still do the right thing. “What if we can get him help?” Dove exchanged a worried look with Carol before she placed a comforting arm around her sister’s shoulders. “I heard the CDC was working on a cure.”

“We all heard that before the world went to hell,” Shane retorted.

“What if the CDC’s still up and running,” Rick attempted to reason with them.

“Even if the CDC is still up and running, and that’s a strong if! You really think we got enough time to get Jim there and get him help before he starts to take advantage of the buffet of people out here,” Dove couldn’t help but roll her eyes.

“Now listen!” Rick raised his voice slightly, “If there’s any government left, any structure at all, they’d protect the CDC at all costs. Right? It’s our best shot. Shelter, protection…”

Shane cut Rick off before he could finish. Even a blind man could see that there was a battle going on deep inside Daryl’s head at that point from the way his face was twitching. Dove’s eyes flickered from the weapon in his hand to the two men arguing. At the mention of Fort Benning, Dove heard Carol let out a quiet, yet annoyed sigh.

“That’s 100 miles in the other direction,” Lori pointed out.

“That is correct, but it’s away from the hot zone,” Shane continued.

“Yeah and you’ve been talking about going to Fort Benning since the first week we got here,” Dove snapped, “If you thought Fort Benning was so good, why didn’t we just head there from the jump once we had a big enough group? The military didn’t seem to be handling it very well at all from how Atlanta looks, anyway.” Dove watched as Shane clenched his jaw and ran a hand through his hair. Rick cut him off before he had a chance to retaliate.

“She’s right. The military was on the front line and they got over run! We go 100 miles for what? The CDC is closer, at least if there’s nothing there maybe it won’t be so bad and we can circle back and head towards Fort Benning, It’s Jim’s only chance,” Rick pleaded.

“You go get some aspirin and do what y’all wanna do,” Daryl started as he began to move towards Jim. Dove’s grip on Carol’s shoulder tightened. “Someone needs to have some balls to take care of this damn problem!” Carol covered her mouth with both hands as Daryl swung the pickaxe up and Rick pointed his gun at the back of Daryl’s head.

“Oh my god, he’s gonna kill him,” Carol whispered as Dove clung to her arm.

Dove’s hands still shook as she watched. “No, I think we’re good.” She flinched as Daryl slammed the pickaxe into the dirt. “No one else needs to die today,” she said in a quiet voice as the two of them began to follow after Rick.

~

Dove approached Daryl slowly. The smell of the bodies was awful from being out in the heat all day, but part of her had to go see what was happening. Maybe things would never be normal again, but the part of her that was the caretaker seemed like it could never shut up. “That was a stupid thing you did back there. Tryin to kill Jim right in front of everyone like that.” Dove raised a hand to shield her eyes from the sun. Daryl only grunted in response before he looked up from the task at hand.

His blue eyes seemed to stare right through her, “You come out here to preach to me, bird? Sounded like you were on my side about havin to put people down before it comes time to actually take action.” He growled before he stepped to the side and swung the pickaxe down into the head of the next person in line. “Didn’t seem too upset bout your family dyin’ neither.”

“Ed ain’t my family, first of all. Only family by circumstance but we never got along. Second of all, I got no tears to cry for wife beaters,” Dove scowled as she glanced down and kicked at Ed’s hand. She didn’t see that Daryl had opened his mouth to respond before he stopped.

Carol approached, quiet as a mouse. Dove drew in a deep breath, her hazel eyes locked on her sister as she waited for her to speak. “I’ll do it. He’s my husband.” Dove’s eyes went wide as she watched her sister try to stifle tears. Daryl looked hesitant; his gaze went to Dove before she simply shrugged her shoulders. The brunette placed a comforting hand on her sister’s shoulder as she watched her take the pickaxe from Daryl.

“Hey…You’ll be okay. I’m right here if you change your mind,” Dove reassured her with a tiny smile before she stepped back, closer to Daryl than she meant to.

She wasn’t sure if Carol’s sobs were for the fact that Ed was dead or for the fact that she was finally getting an emotional release after years of abuse. As Carol finally let the pickaxe come to rest on the ground, Dove walked up behind her sister and wrapped her arms around her. Carol sniffed and raised a hand to wipe her face as the pickaxe was taken from her by Daryl. “You’re alright,” Dove said in an attempt to comfort her sister. “You, me, and Sophia? We’re gonna be just fine now. He can’t hurt you anymore.”

____

@crossbowking​

[mamasboys]

A little bit of magic.

A few weeks ago, my seven-year-old told us he had a new imaginary friend, a penguin named Sensei Wang. 

He wrote a letter and dropped it in our mailbox, and lo and behold, a few days later, the letter had disappeared. What’s even more, dear readers, is that a few days after that, Kass went to get the mail, and inside the slot, was a bright red envelope with his name on it, written neatly in a silvery pen. 

Sensei Wang had written back. 

The joy on Kass’s face was indescribable. 

There have been other imaginary friends. Carl, who died an untimely death in an auto collision. There was Mittens the frog, and Ed and Ash, who still come around sometimes. But none had written letters. Until Sensei Wang.

Since then, our fearless little penguin has written more letters. They arrive every few days, each time in a newly colored envelope, but all addressed to Kass in the same silver pen, and never stamped. Because you don’t need stamps when it comes to dexterous, witty and unflappable penguins. Turns out, you don’t need anything more than a firm belief that the world can still be a magical place.

I do it because we all need a bit of magic these days, as trite or oversimplified as that sounds. ( I’d fucking kill for some, right about now.) My children are learning day by day that cruelty exists, that bad guys are out there, that things can turn on a dime. And I’d like to take their minds off of that, steer them clear, and restore their hope. And I do, in my own small ways. Like letters from imaginary friends. 

I do it because it takes 10 minutes out of my life. I do it because I'm a nerd. I do it to make up for things I am working on as a mother. Things that might never change. Case in point - I picked up the guinea pig this morning who grunted in annoyance, and wistfully I remarked “I don’t think Wallace likes me so much.” Without missing a beat, Kass replied “That’s because he remembers you as The Yeller.” It’s true; I have no indoor voice when it comes to getting my kids to eat/do homework/brush teeth/wipe their butts. Instead, I bark. But I also take time to channel my inner penguin. 

I do it because it’s easy, and fun, and the reward is priceless. The reward is my son’s faith that life can be full of wonderful surprises. Of course Kass already asked if I was the secret voice behind Sensei Wang, but he didn’t wait for or want an answer. I think we both know the truth, as it stands, with regards to the letters. But we’re both game, willing to suspend our disbelief. Every day, we wait for the mailman. We wait with giant grins on our faces. Because we owe it to ourselves. We owe ourselves some happiness, no matter where it comes from, or how it gets here.