#help the stuck me in a last minute meeting with our product development lead and our creative and art director

[atruththatyoudeny]

Happy 28th! I’ve read so many awesome fics this month! Make sure to check them all out. As always, all my love to all the authors in this fandom ♥

➻ don't want to fight you | starryharry | enemies to lovers - enemies to friends to lovers - pining - mutual pining - angst - fluff slow burn - no smut - 124k Louis hates that it’s familiar. He hates that sparring Harry is familiar because they train together. He hates that he even has to spar Harry at all, because Harry is good. Louis wonders what his life would be like if him and Harry didn’t hate each other. He can’t picture it, really. The incessant bickering that often turns into real arguing, the nasty looks, the eye rolls, the middle fingers. It all feels very necessary at this point. Or, the one where two fighters can also be lovers because routines are never permanent.

➻ we are ghosts amongst these hills | louisgaynkles | Soulmates - reincarnation - historical - slow burn - angst - fluff - 84k Harry spontaneously buys a house in Yorkshire because the universe, or fate, keeps leading him to it. What he didn’t know, is that his new house comes with a past that seems to be mysteriously tied to his own life. Before he knows it he finds himself travelling back in time, stuck in the middle of a century old love story. Featuring Louis as a farmer with a passion for gardening, Zayn as the heir to the local manor, Niall as a pub owner with a secret, and a truly underappreciated Liam. Based on Mariana by Susanna Kearsley

➻ through the wheatfields and the coastlines | thepolourryexpress | farms - cowboys - angst - implied/referenced homophobia - implied/referenced gun use - humor - smut - 53k “You’re not from around here, are ya?” Hot Cowboy asks, tracking his little lamb with his eyes. Louis frowns slightly, having thought he was doing pretty well at not sticking out like a sore thumb. It’s not like he’s not from around here — it’s not his first summer he’s spent at his grandparents'. But he supposes that the Manhattan city lifestyle that he’s used to is always going to shine through. “I’m visiting family for the summer,” Louis explains, cheeks a little pink. “Trying to get some work done without distractions.” Or, alternatively, the one where Louis needs inspiration, and a certain cowboy and his lamb are the perfect distraction.

➻ An Irrationally Strong Bond Between Two People | jishler | dystopia - friends to lovers - angst - first time - 18k Before The Advancement, most human lives and careers were plagued by irrationality and a lack of productivity. This was largely the symptom of what scientists refer to as “interpersonal passion,” which included two separate (though often conjointly occurring) phenomena: “love,” and “sex.” “Love” was a pre-Advancement word which referred to an irrationally strong bond between two people, which caused its sufferers to prioritise their fellow “lover,” as well as the integrity of the malignant bond itself, over vital things such as workplace productivity. Taken every two weeks in pill form, The Drug immediately removes interpersonal passion from the human psyche. Children’s friendships do not have the capacity to develop into full-fledged “love” since they are not yet adults. Every person over eighteen takes The Drug gladly, grateful that it allows them to be productive, clear-headed, and rational members of society. A few weeks before Louis’ eighteenth birthday, Harry and Louis fall in love. (Based on the book Louis writes in indiaalphawhiskey's Our Lives, Non-Fiction.)

➻ And When It's Time | larryftnoctrl | Soulmates - soulmate-identifying timers - 6k Louis wants a soulmate, Harry loves his free will. They don't exactly go hand in hand. Prompt: AU where you have a countdown on your wrist for when you're going to meet your soulmate and if you miss it the time will reset. Louis/Harry keep having awful luck and always are missing their time until one day they don't. Maybe the other one is scared/has anxiety about meeting their soulmate? Maybe one time they're in a relationship so they intentionally miss their time? Who knows! But they finally meet :D

➻ made for lovin' you | cuddlerlouis | a/b/o - enemies to lovers - hate to love - soulmates - hurt/comfort - angst - fluff smut - 53k “I’m in,” is all Louis receives. He blinks a few times, making sure he’s reading this right. “For real?” he asks, just to be a hundred percent sure. “Yes,” pops up. “How do you wanna pursue?” The alpha adds, like he’s on a special mission or something. “I’m gonna call us a cab to go to mine. Once I know it’s here, I’ll leave and join you there,” Louis explains. “I’ll text you to go around five minutes before it arrives, so it doesn’t look suspicious, and our friends don’t notice us leaving together.” “Noted.” So Louis does, and ten minutes later, he’s sat in the backseat of a cab, next to Harry Styles, the person he hates the most but unfortunately still finds attractive. They’re on their way to fuck in Louis’ flat. Splendid. - Or the one where a quick, horny decision ruins Louis’ summer plans, but may also lead to unexpected discoveries. Featuring the road trip of dreams, misunderstandings, and a bit of fate.

➻ deFENCEless | solvetheminourdreams | neighbors - enemies to lovers enemies to friends to lovers - gardening - fluff - humor - banter - no smut - 27k "I moved here first," Louis says with finality, crossing his arms over his chest. Harry shoots him an unimpressed look before leaning forward, leaving only a tiny gap between them. "Then get the fence first," he whispers, lips a mere inch or two away from Louis'. When Louis butts heads with his new neighbor who loves to garden a little too much, all he can do to protect his yard (and heart), is keep on building up his fence(s).

➻ Canyon Moon | delsicle | a/b/o - werewolf - soulmates - childhood friends - friends to lovers - arranged marriage - mutual pining - hurt/comfort - angst - 41k For as long as Louis has remembered, he has been promised to be mated to Harry, his best friend and the future pack alpha. But Louis’s heart belonged to the forest and to the hunt more than he could ever imagine it belonging to Harry. Then Harry’s father dies in a violent accident, and Louis’s future alpha disappears on the wind. An A/B/O Lion King AU

➻ only guilty of loving you | sweetrevenge | a/b/o - strangers to lovers - blind date - soulmates - fluff - angst - mutual pining - smut - 22k After Harry gets set up with his co-worker's alpha friend Louis, he's expecting some pleasant conversation, free dinner, and maybe a new friend. What he doesn't expect, however, is that Louis' arrival in his life begins a life of crime Harry never knew he had in him. A You've Got Mail!AU with a twist.

➻ 'Til Everything Changes | lovelarry10 | a/b/o - older characters - brokend bond - loss - falling in love - fluff - implied mpreg - smut - 57k Harry’s nose twitched as he caught a scent on the breeze, one that sent a shudder through his whole body. His eyes closed subconsciously, and he lost himself in the heady scent, the vanilla top notes, and the more woody undertones, making every hair on Harry’s body stand on end. That was how Harry discovered this man was an Alpha. “Jaz, Harry, this is my Uncle Louis. Lou, this is my girlfriend Jasmine, and her dad Harry.” "Lovely to meet you,” Louis grinned, leaning in and kissing Jasmine’s cheek quickly, a respectful Alpha gesture. Harry held his breath as Louis stuck out a hand, taking it almost reluctantly, certain the Alpha would pick up on his own scent and the nerves flowing through it. “Hi, Harry.” “Hi,” Harry said, his voice low and raspy, still affected by Louis’ scent. “Nice to meet you.” ~~~~ Harry’s an Omega who has been alone for too long. Louis’ an Alpha who is scared to find love again. Thanks to the meddling of Harry’s teenage daughter and her boyfriend, the two seem destined to meet, and it might just change everything they thought they knew about their lives. Will they find what they didn’t realise they’ve always wanted in each other?

➻ Mind Over Matter (You Under Me) | youreyesonlarry | ice hockey - hurt/comfort - angst - fluff - major character injury - pining - unrequited love hospitalization - smut - 74k It’s dark outside when Harry finishes practice for the day. -------- Prompt 21: Harry stopped playing hockey (after 10 years of a professional career) because of a severe injury. The dream he worked so hard for vanished in the blink of an eye. His family insisted that he had to go to physical therapy, even if it only helped his health. Cue to personal assistant Louis, the most efficient and kind PA one could hire

➻ Rooms on Fire | softfonds | a/b/o - actors - famous/famous - friends with benefits - secret relationship - 34k Ten years ago, Louis helping Harry through a heat was the start of a romance that ended in heartbreak. Now, Harry's marriage is over thanks to his husband's very public infidelity, and Louis is fresh off a Golden Globe win. The last thing they both expect is to be cast in the same movie.

➻ Stumbling Into Your Arms | sunshineandthemoonlight | a/b/o - strangers to lovers - college/university - fluff - 7k Suddenly, Harry’s nose was brushing against Louis' neck, where his scent was overwhelming. Harry jerked his head to the side and took a deep breath of air, trying to clear his nose of Louis’ scent. ‘Don’t get slick, don’t get hard, don’t get slick’, he repeated to himself in his head, like a mantra. Louis and Harry are university students heading home for the holidays. Harry quickly becomes enraptured by the attractive alpha standing across from him in the train carriage, who has a heavenly scent and a gentle smile.

➻ Little by Little | nonsensedarling | mpreg - non traditional a/b/o - exploring sexuality - exploring secondary gender norms - gender identity strangers to friends to lovers - mutual pining - fluff - slow burn - 65k Harry Styles is an omega who works at the London Planetarium, has lived in the same flat for ages, and is happy enough on his own. When he gets home from his first (horrible) attempt at dating in years, a new pregnant neighbor knocks on his door after smelling his cooking. He and Louis quickly become close, but their friendship gets complicated when Harry begins questioning who he is and what he likes. Or Harry discovers figuring out who you are is more complicated than a potato metaphor.

[cherryrogers]

➸ eye candy

pairing: bucky barnes x reader | office au

warnings: swearing, mostly fluff.

word count: 3.7k

synopsis: Being Tony Stark’s receptionist was hard. Working alongside the most gorgeous salesman you’d ever seen was even harder. Actually talking to said salesman? Well, that was just insane.

a/n: so this is sorta based of the show ‘the office’,,, we love a good office romance :) please enjoy and feedback is always appreciated !!

“Good morning, (Y/N). All of these papers need photocopied, signed and posted to all of our clients by twelve o’clock, sharp.”

Tony Stark was going to be the death of you.

Hesitant eyes landed on the enormous pile of paperwork that your boss had just slapped on your desk. There was no way all of that was getting done in the next two hours.

“I’m a receptionist, Tony. Not a miracle worker.” You shrugged, looking up to meet his eyes. “I can’t get all of this finished by lunch on my own. Can’t you help me out?”

“You see,” The man sighed. “These papers are now on your desk. That means the responsibility of them has been passed on to you. Not my problem anymore. I’m sure you can find yourself another happy helper.”

He started to walk away, causing you to lean over your desk and try to grab back his attention. “But Tony-”

“Can’t hear you, already walking away.” Tony called behind him, quickly pacing towards his office. “And now I’m opening the door to my office, and now I’m entering...”

The man’s voice faded as he swiftly closed the door to his office, leaving the headache-inducing pile of paperwork to sit hauntingly on the edge of your desk. Sitting back in your leather chair, you let out a quiet huff.

This was going to be a long day.

Becoming a receptionist hadn’t always been the plan. The plan was to work your ass off after you graduated high school so that you had enough money to go travelling around the globe, gaining work experience in different countries and making memories along the way. Maybe even not returning back to America, but going on to live a quiet life in the South of France or maintaining the busy work life in Japan.

However, it’d been a while since graduation, and you still hadn’t stepped foot out of the state of New York.

Working for Stark Industries was only meant to last a few months, it was only meant to be a temporary job until you found something that paid a little better. For some reason, however, you were still handling everything at the reception desk a year later.

Stark Industries was a small tech company developed by the man himself, Tony Stark. He’d had high hopes for the company, insisting that as soon as clients started rolling in, the company would be worth six figures in no time. You weren’t exactly sure what his definition of ‘no time’ was, but it’d been kind of a long time since the company was up and running.

You had to hand it to the guy, though. Tony built every piece of tech he sold himself from scratch. While there were workers in the warehouse who eventually aided in the development of the products, it all started with Stark. There was a part of you that deeply hoped Stark Industries would take off, finally fulfilling Tony’s dream.

But when the guy decided to hand you a ton of paperwork to do in an impossible amount of time, that hope was soon retracted out of frustration.

The main door to the office clicking open caught your attention, and a grin immediately made its way onto your lips.

“Hey, Sam.” You greeted your co-worker as he walked past your desk.

Turning his head to you, he quirked a questioning brow. “You seem weirdly smiley for a Monday morning. D’you want somethin’?”

“Well, since you asked...” You let out a laugh, patting your hand on top of the pile of paperwork you had yet to move. “All of this needs copied and signed and-”

“Nope, no way.” Sam shook his head. “I’m already behind on sales. Stark will have my head if I don’t make some today, and you know how much I love avoiding that guy at all costs.”

The grin fell off your lips easily. “But I can’t do it all myself!”

“Ain’t my problem, girl.” The man shrugged, beginning to try and get away from your desk, and your pleading.

“You sound just like Tony.” You called after him, resulting in him turning around and giving you a glare.

“How dare you.”

After that encounter, Sam stayed glued to his computer all morning, trying to sell as many products to clients as he could. Meanwhile, you were still stuck with a bunch of work that you hadn’t started yet.

Your eyes scanned the office. It was rather small, the only rooms being Tony’s office, the kitchen, the break room, and the main office area.

Natasha and Clint sat in the far corner of the room, usually never doing what they were meant to. You weren’t quite sure how they still had their jobs, considering you never saw either of them pick up a phone or touch their computer mouse. The redhead was currently grasping a bag of Hershey’s Kisses in one hand, and throwing them over her monitor in an attempt to make one land in Clint’s mouth with the other.

Through the glass of the door leading to the kitchen, you could see a tall blond taking his sweet time making himself a coffee. Steve hated working here, anyone with eyes could tell he’d rather always be anywhere else. He wanted something more than just a nine-to-five office job. Steve wanted to make an impact on the world, and he wasn’t so sure he could do that from a run down office building just outside the city.

Maybe you could convince him to help you.

Within thirty seconds, you had pushed yourself out of your desk chair and hurried over to the kitchen, giving Steve an innocent smile as you entered the small room.

“Hey, blondie. You’re not busy, are you?”

“If you’re asking on behalf of Stark, then yes, I’m incredibly busy.”

“Certainly looks like it.” You motioned towards the coffee he’d been stirring for the past five minutes. “Must be one hell of a coffee if it took you ten whole minutes to make.”

Steve narrowed his eyes at you. “Making coffee is an art. I would expect you to understand.”

“I understand that you’re not being at all productive right now, and I could really use some help with all the paperwork that needs sent out to clients-”

“Oh my god.” The blond groaned. “Did you come in here just to ask me to do work? I’m just tryin’ to make coffee here-”

“Steeeeve.” His name came out in a whine. “I’m desperate here.”

“Can’t you ask Sam to help?”

“Already did.”

“Natasha?”

“Too busy pelting Clint with candy.”

“What about Bucky?” At the mention of his friend’s name, a blush rose in your cheeks. Oh, fuck. Steve instantly smirked. “Aw, you don’t wanna ask him, do you? Does he make you nervous?”

You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms over your chest. “Stop it; I- I haven’t seen him this morning. Haven’t had the chance to ask him.”

“Well, he’s at his desk now. Doesn’t look occupied.” Steve nudged your arm with his elbow. “I’m sure Buck will help you out.”

“You think?”

“Oh, he will.” He let out a laugh, causing you to raise your brow at him curiously. How could he be so sure?

Steve noticed you eyeing him. “What?”

“How do you know that he’ll help me?”

“Just do.”

“If you and Sam won’t help, what makes you think Bucky will?”

“Nothing. Go ask him.”

“But you seemed so sure-”

“He knows that you have a crush on him.”

“He- he what?” You gaped, confused as to why Steve was acting so casual about it. Bucky knew? Oh no, oh god. Your life was officially over.

Since you started at the company, you’d always had an eye for the salesman that was directly in your line of sight from your seat behind the reception desk. Originally, Bucky was just good eye candy for when you got bored in the middle of any work you were supposed to be finishing. That was going great. You didn’t mind that you’d never had a conversation with the guy before, because if he turned out to be perfect inside and out, you knew there’d be an issue.

So when he first made conversation with you one morning when the both of you were early to work, you came to the conclusion that you were fucked. He complimented your hair that morning, offered to make you coffee, shot you a cheeky wink before strolling over to his desk. After that came the issue. The issue that you’d developed this stupid crush on him which he probably didn’t reciprocate.

Steve obviously noticed - how could he not notice the receptionist practically drooling over his best friend every time he looked up from his desk? When he actually sat down and did his work, of course.

“Did you tell him?” You pouted up at the blond, who found amusement in your panic. “I swear, Steven Grant, if you told him-”

“Calm down, woman.” He raised his hands in defense. “I didn’t tell him anything... except that you’re single and that you have a thing for man-buns.”

“Oh my- I’m gonna have to quit. This is your fault, Steve. I’ve quitting my job and changing my name.”

“C’mon, (Y/N) - you’re being dramatic.”

“That’s not my name anymore.” You shook your head, putting your hands on your hips. “I’m now going by... Anastasia.”

“Why Anastasia?”

“This sort of thing would never happen to a girl called Anastasia.”

Steve scoffed, leaning his back against the counter and finally sipping his coffee. “I don’t get what you’re freaking out about. You want him to know you’re available, right?”

“Available, yes. Not specifically desperate for men that can tie their hair up in a bun, of which there’s only one of in this building, and that’s him, Steve. That one man is Bucky, and now he’s gonna think I’m weird.”

“(Y/N)-”

“We discussed this, Steve. It’s Anastasia now. Oh yeah, I’ve gotta go and tell Tony I’m resigning and that (Y/N) not longer exists-”

“He likes you too, okay?” Steve suddenly raised his voice, before pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration. “God, you two are the worst.”

There’s a short silence between you and the blond. Bucky... liked you back? Uh, what? This was seriously news to you. Holy- what if you were his eye candy too? Never mind, scrap the quitting idea. If Bucky liked you back, this was your time to shine. The ball was in your court now. Hell yeah.

“Bucky likes me?” You asked quietly.

“Mhm.” Steve replied reluctantly, his lips against the edge of his coffee cup.

“So... I should go and ask him to help me with the paperwork?”

“Yup.”

“And he won’t mind because he likes me?”

“No, he won’t.”

A satisfied smile crept onto your lips, and you resisted the urge to just grab Steve and pull him into a victory hug. Instead, you opted for a friendly pat on the chest.

“Blondie, you should’ve just led with that.”

“For the love of- just... go get your man, Anastasia.”

You caught the corner of his lips upturning before you spun around, heading for the door that lead back into the main area.

“Screw that Anastasia girl. This is (Y/N)’s time to thrive.”

Steve only rolled his eyes as you exited the kitchen, a new, confident glow radiating off you as your eyes landed on your favorite bun-wearing tech salesman. Not that you knew many tech salesmen that wore buns in their hair, but you know.

He was slowly tapping away at his keyboard, tired eyes glancing around his computer screen and you couldn’t help but swoon. God, he was the epitome of perfection. How could such a man be working alongside you for a super small tech company? Shouldn’t he be a model or something? A swimwear model, fuck; that would be a sight-

“(Y/N)?”

It was at the sound of your name being called that you realized you were standing completely still in the middle of the room, staring Bucky down like an utter weirdo. The man smiled softly at you as you let out a nervous laugh, trying to hide your blatant embarrassment.

That glowing confidence? Definitely gone. You were not thriving anymore... and that would sure never have happened to Anastasia. Never. Maybe changing your name was still on the cards.

However, in that moment, you were you. And Bucky was sitting only a meter away from you, probably wondering what the hell was wrong with you.

“Uh, hi.” You finally mustered out, approaching his desk. Uh, hi? Uh, hi?! Oh, lord...

“Hey.” He chuckled. “You alright?”

“I’m great!” You answered, perching yourself on the side of his desk. “I, uh, I like your bun.”

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck-

“Thanks.” Bucky tilted his head to the side, leaning back in his seat. “Steve told me you liked man-buns.”

You were definitely going to have to talk to Steve about his wing-man skills after this was over. “Is that why you’re wearing one today?”

“Maybe.”

Oh, you weren’t expecting him to actually respond to that. Fuck, this was actually going kind of well.

Bucky had his bottom lip between his teeth, watching as you fumbled for any sort of words to leave your mouth. Any would do.

“It suits you. Not that I don’t like your hair down as well. I think it looks great either way, honestly. I’m sure even if you had short hair, you’d be able to pull that off too...”

Heavens above, please stop me from rambling and sounding like a complete idiot, you thought to yourself.

Bucky didn’t look phased, as his gorgeous smile only widened. “I guess that’s something we have in common then.”

“What?”

“Lookin’ good all of the time.”

Shit. Your cheeks were definitely tomato red after his comment. Why did he have to be so damn charming?

“So, did you come over here just to give me a confidence boost?” Bucky teased. “If being a receptionist doesn’t work out, you’d be a pretty good motivational speaker.”

You playfully glared at him. “Being a receptionist wasn’t my ultimate career goal, you know.”

“What was it then?”

“I mean, I don’t really know. Something to do with travelling, though - where I could see the world and everything it has to offer.” You let out a sigh. “I just don’t wanna be cooped up in an office forever, you know?”

You worried that you’d started rambling again, but by the interested expression on Bucky’s face, it seemed like he was listening intently. “Yeah, I get it. Salesman wasn’t always my goal either.”

The corner of your mouth upturned. “Can I guess what yours was?”

“You can try.”

As you furrowed your brows in thought, Bucky couldn’t help but skim his eyes over your features. Your eyes slightly squinted in focus, soft lips pursed, jaw locked. Despite his outgoing demeanor, he’d always been nervous to just start up a conversation with you in the office. He saw you five days a week, for eight hours a day, and he still got butterflies whenever you walked his way.

“A firefighter.” Your voice snapped him out of his daze.

“Nope.”

“A college professor?”

“No.”

“Hmm... a hair stylist?”

“No, funnily enough.”

“It’s a swimwear model, isn’t it?”

“(Y/N), that couldn’t be more far from the right answer.”

You sighed internally. It was worth a shot.

“Alright, what was it?” You chuckled.

“A chef.”

A chef, huh? You probably would’ve never guessed that. You didn’t know a lot about Bucky, so you didn’t realize that he even had an interest in cooking. It did explain why he always brought his own lunch, though, rather than slumming it with the rest of the office who just grabbed some chips from the vending machine and whatever fruit was left in the kitchen.

“You like to cook?”

“I love to cook.” He grinned, making your heart ache at how pretty his smile was. “Have done since I was a kid. I’ve been told I make a mean beef bourguignon.”

“Sounds fancy; I’d like to try it.”

“Maybe I can make it for you some time.”

Talking to Bucky became easier with every minute you were sat on his desk, trying not to get lost in his blue eyes as he spoke passionately about his ambitions. He told you about how he’d always wanted to open his own restaurant, but he’d never had the money to do so. His favorite dish to eat was admittedly a classic cheese and tomato pizza, but a homemade one that wasn’t doused in oil and salt, which was fair enough... even though you secretly lived for the Domino’s pizza you ordered every couple of weeks to treat yourself.

And after falling into a long, comfortable conversation with the man you used to barely be able to utter out a ‘hello’ to, the realization later hit you at eleven fifty-nine, that the work that was meant to be finished in one minute still hadn’t been completed.

After the whole conversation with Steve about asking Bucky for help, you didn’t even do the one thing that you were planning to do.

In a panic, you darted your eyes towards the area on your desk where Tony had slammed the stack of papers on your desk, confused as to why the large stack wasn’t actually still sitting there.

Before you could come up with a logical explanation, your boss flung open the door of his office, quickly making a beeline over to where you were still sat next to the monitor on Bucky’s desk.

“(Y/N), my number one receptionist.” He greeted you.

“I’m sure I’m the only receptionist you know, Tony, but I guess I’ll take the compliment.”

The man slapped his hands together enthusiastically. “So, did you get all the paperwork posted? I know it was a lot, but it’s important that our clients get those forms.”

You quickly glanced back to your desk, making sure that the paperwork really wasn’t there anymore and that you weren’t just seeing things. Where could it have disappeared to? Unless some form of higher power knew how pissed Tony would be if it wasn’t done and somehow did it all for you, you were pretty slumped for a rational explanation.

“Uhh...”

“Yep, (Y/N) got the paperwork all posted. Just like you asked.” You heard the voice of a certain blond next to you. “Sam and I gave her a hand.”

Sam and Steve gave you a hand? But how- wait.

“Fantastic.” Tony beamed, pointing a finger towards you. “I knew I could count on you, kid. Keep doing what you’re doing, and I might give you a raise.”

As the receptionist, you knew Stark Industries wasn’t yet making enough money for anyone to earn a raise. But you didn’t want to ruin the guy’s moment.

After sending him a thankful smile, you watched as Tony walked away, and once he was out of sight, you slowly turned your attention to Steve.

“You,” You gave him a warning look, before turning to Sam who had also decided to make an appearance. “And you, Sam. This was all planned, wasn’t it?”

The two men nodded proudly, as if they’d just pulled off the greatest scheme of the century. They were idiots. Smart, but still idiots. Did there really need to be a whole plan to bring you and Bucky together?

“Sam and I are dedicated wing-men, you know.” Steve shrugged. “We’re not complete assholes - we would’ve helped you with the paperwork when you asked, but we thought that this could be a good opportunity to get you two to actually converse.”

“Yeah, Bucky sure needed the push. Poor dude gets nervous from just looking at you.”

“Alright, Sam.” Bucky glared at his friend. “I think the joke’s on you guys, though - considering we got to have a nice conversation and you were left with all the paperwork.”

“Like I said,” Steve replied nonchalantly. “Dedicated wing-men.”

Before you could ask any more questions, a stern cough stopped your from doing so. “I’m sorry to interrupt your mothers’ meeting, but I’m trying to run a business here, guys. Wilson, you’re behind on sales, and don’t think I don’t notice you hiding out in the kitchen every morning, Rogers.”

Steve sighed. He really thought that was working for him.

“Barnes, you’re doing great.” Tony patted his shoulder reassuringly, making the salesman smile smugly up at his two frustrated friends. “(Y/N), I need some papers organised, and could you use those pastel highlighters to color-coordinate them? You know I love those highlighters - they really liven up the boring work, you know?”

“Sure thing, boss.” You nodded as Sam and Steve began to make their way back to their desks, leaving you and Bucky alone again after Tony returned to his office.

“I guess I’ve got some color-coordinating to do.” You pushed yourself off Bucky’s desk, standing up straight.

“Wait,” Bucky stopped you from straying any further from his desk. “Would you... wanna do somethin’ tonight? After work?”

A smirk played on your lips. Bucky fucking Barnes was asking you out. Once again, screw that Anastasia girl. Would Bucky Barnes ever ask her out? Nope, because he was asking you out. Okay, stop talking to yourself. The guy needs an answer.

“Sure, I’d like that. You gonna make some of your beef bargain john for me?”

“Bourguignon, sweetheart.” The man let out a hearty laugh. “If you can pronounce it right, I’ll make it for you.”

You scoffed. “That’s just mean... bourg- bourg-on... crap.”

“S’not really close enough, sorry.” Bucky shrugged, knowing that he’d end up making it for you anyway.

“Whatever.” You muttered, slowly walking back over to your desk only a few feet away from Bucky’s. You could see the guy biting back a smile as he pretended to return to his work. Fuck, you really did like him. And you were going on a date with him. That night. Perhaps that higher power really was on your side.

“Bourg-a-non!”

“Not quite.”

“Dammit.”

Maybe the office wasn’t so bad after all.

[sleeplessandstubborn]

Emily in Paris episode 3 or it’s still more accurate than American media recent coverture on France.

Ah, I had to write that title. And I am not even talking about American Twitter. But yeah. Feel better. Somewhat I have the impression that this is going to substitute the still a better love story than Twilight in my mind. But, I’m sorry, Stephenie Meyer, I am not here for that but to make a belated, totally improvised, not at all completely planned recap of Episode 3 of Emily in Paris, your favourite Instagram version of the French capital.

So episode 3 starts with our heroine running, as she usually does every morning. Why this Paris is more empty than the town where I live which has like 25,000 inhabitants? So many questions about where did people go. The case is her boss in Chicago calls. Yes, the one who speaks French and should be now best friends with Sylvie but it’s stuck in Chicago with her pregnancy.

I know, Madeline, I know. It would be frustrating for me too that the main trait of my personality was I’m pregnant and on my bed. They both exchange about how now that Doug dumped her Emily’s life is full of croissants and sex, when actually is about sex. Also Emily meets street furniture. As does Madeline, too. I guess that’s not the kind of idea she had of meeting French men. Thanks Anne! Hidalgo of course.

Madeline is sending Emily the corporate commandments for Savoir. Yikes, I thought again, a cultural clash is coming and what are corporate commandments anyway (I don’t know, sounds tacky, I’m just a puzzled European), but for now there are another problems to solve. Emily’s shower breaks, the building manager only speaks French and of course our leading lady is still struggling with understanding it. Also, sidenote: manager building is right with Miss Cooper. Only problems.

Fortunately Gabriel exists and he helps her to break the language barrier. But this isn’t going to magically repair her shower and so Emily has to wash her hair in one of humanity’s wonders, one apex of civilization, the bidet. It’s supposed to be a bad hair day for her afterwards but... Does she look that different? Well, not for me! Discuss:

This shows... A character development! At last! Emily is trying to learn French, and even if her beret isn’t going to help in the task, is good to see she’s trying to adapt. Still, she’s overdoing a bit with that Gioconda bag.

I mean, girl. Relax. In order to improve her knowledge, she tries to trick her teacher - who considers a working place full of French people must be an interesting environment where to study the behaviour of the Emily Cooperius Chicagoensis but refuses the pleasure of her company if there’s not a 50 euros banknote in between. Business is business after all. Cut to Emily reuniting with my adored godess Sylvie, whose elegance and beauty only can be matched with the flag of the twelve stars in the background. Ah, Freude, schöner Götterfunken/ Tochter aus Elysium,/ Wir betreten feuertrunken/ Himmlische, dein Heiligtum!

Well, the case is they are going to film the advertisement for De l’Heure today and it’s an important thing Emily keeps her mouth closed and unsmiling because she looks stupid, at least in Sylvie’s opinion. I’d say more scary but well.

Luc and Julien receive them with the enraged face of every European citizen who just met an aggresive attempt  of being forced into the American Way of Doing Things. Which they refuse naturally. Madeline just sent the corporate commandments and everyone is pissed at nonsense like giving praise in public and critizising in private. But off to filming the spot for the perfume. The location is the Pont d’Alexandre III that has featured in like 20,000 advertisement for fragrances. Here they met Antoine and Emily has the twentieth humiliating experience with languages telling she’s horny out of a sudden when she wanted to mean excited.

Emily meets the model, a Serbian blonde beauty that doesn’t speak French, that’s her personality trait. Our heroine seems rejoiced to find at least a kindred soul but we won’t have more time with the model, whose task is to walk across the bridge naked - or wearing the perfume, Antoine says - , while surrounded by men in costumes. The campaign Dream of Beauty, in short. Emily’s reaction is this:

Antoine argues this is meant to represent the woman’s fantasy, to be desired by all these men. Emily doesn’t think this is going to be appreciated by women at the other side of the Atlantic ocean and says the idea is sexists rather than sexy. Filming stop for they to debate, which seems expensive. Stopping, not debating. Without entering on what fantasies are valid or not and who actually pays attention to advertisements for fragrances - I am not one of these people - we don’t get to learn if Emily knows who Cocteau was.

The following morning the plumber can’t fix Emily’s shower. His gestures are pretty easy to understand, as it’s an universal fact that often the pieces needed to repair are not immediately available. Anyway, Emily asks Gabriel to help her with translation again. She must pay him or something. The thing doesn’t get to be fixed and Emily gets to shower in Gabriel’s appartment.

Maybe he has a fantasy of some sort here? Who knows. At the office and after her class, Emily’s first conversation of the day with Sylvie goes, as usual, for a rocky start. She has made lost money and time to the company, her boss argues, and on top of that she’s the prude police. The final straw for Emily immediately after that is that someone (called Luc) drew a dick on the Sacred Corporate Commandments. Having forgotten the fact that drawing penises is part of the human nature since the dawn of times, Emily doesn’t take well the profanation. It’s too much so she goes to lunch with Mindy.

Mindy - who is celebrating a party later and invites her - rolls her eyes at the corporate commandments and more or less say she deserves the hate because she could not expect French people were going to receive that gladly because they are against all. Well, it’s one of their multiple charms. “People like me! That’s my thing!” , Emily argues. Oh my sweet Summer child... Once back at the office, the commercial is as nonsensical as your average perfume commercial. Emily suggests a poll on Twitter to decide if it’s sexy or sexists. Bad or good, they’ll have publicity. Sounds about right?

One day I want to be Sylvie when she answers, after Emily invited her to Mandy’s party: Sorry, I’m busy. Also when she goes on with a mini the reason you suck moment: “You come to Paris. You walk into my office. You don’t even bother to learn the language. You treat the city like it’s your amusement park”. Apparently Emily can’t wrap her head around the idea of not everyone liking her and that you don’t have why to be friends with your bosses or workmates. Girl, just a civilized relationship with them is enough. Anyway... Emily does invite her, incapable of taking a no for an answer.

As predictable - don’t say you didn’t predict it - the party is a bit crowded and, leaving aside Mindy, Emily doesn’t know anyone there. Because, Sylvie knowing better, she didn’t show up. Well done Madame. Out of water again, Emily finds an apparently cute boy who engages in a conversation with her. With hand kissing at the balcony at all.

All it’s very romantic until, when they are strolling the streets and after flirting a bit, Fabien I think was his name - sorry, not checking again - tells her he likes American pussies. This is too much information all of a sudden for Emily - even if it could lead her to learn another the meaning of a new French word, equally related with felines - and storms off to Gabriel’s restaurant. Why is a thing the chef is there, available to serve her a glass of wine, I don’t know, I didn’t write this thing. But finally, finally, FINALLY our heroine says she’s going to stop trying being liked by everyone. Thank you Paris, you inspired some adult realities on Emily’s brain. It’s also a productive night after all because Gabriel says he likes her. So... yay? Since many of you have already seen the complete season, you know that things are... more complicated than that.

Of course the last three minutes of the episode are reserved for Emily Was Right After All moments. The poll is a success even if the commercial is not universally liked - but as Emily has learn this is not that important anymore -, she takes revenge on Luc bringing a dick shaped bread, or cake - I don’t know exactly what it is - which is a funny and irreverent way to respond him aaaand... finds a present from Antoine on her desk, lingerie from La Perla. Which is, ew, a bit creepy.

Aaaand that was all. I had to rewatch it because it had been eras since I last wrote about this series. I promise to be more disciplined with the next ones. Until then.

P.S. Down with Corporation Commandments.

[theauthenticcommunicator]

10 Tips To Vastly Improve Your Public Speaking

As a coach of speaking and communication skills, I've learned that the same strategies apply to almost every situation where we're sharing our thoughts and ideas.

Graduation speeches, job interviews, eulogies, first dates, sales pitches, monologues and scenes for theater and film, wedding speeches, keynote speeches, and presentations at work are all made better by applying the following recommendations.

01 Breathing

It's the very first thing and the very last thing we do in this life. Improving the quality of your breathing on a daily basis can lead to better physical, mental and spiritual health. How you breathe in the ten minutes before you speak in front of a room full of people will make or break your presentation. Calming your breathing through exercises is something you can start to work on today, so that later when you are called upon to make an impromptu speech you'll be able to master your physiology.

Simply defined, breathing is the interchange of oxygen and carbon dioxide in the body. When we have too much carbon dioxide in the bloodstream, we begin to feel dizzy and experience shortness of breath. Chronic shallow breathing causes anxiety, high blood pressure, digestive problems, sleep disorders, and more. Re- learning to breathe more deeply is one of the most valuable skills to improve.

Unconscious thoughts can sometimes bring to the fore ideas one might easily dismiss as unrealistic.

02 Nix the Notes

If you're a hard worker and you want to get things exactly right, you are likely planning to work with notes during your presentation. You'll rehearse over and over with the goal of getting it exactly right - maybe even close to perfect. The problem with using notes is that it becomes too easy to start reading from them when we're nervous. This will result in a pretty flat presentation. If you memorize your speech word for word, you'll be stuck in your head - remembering. You might get every word right, but you won't be present with your audience because you'll be chained to the script. Structuring the framework of your speech in a way that you'll easily remember is a better approach.

Investigate how you structure your ideas. Get feedback about how you organize your thoughts. This will help you to become more comfortable when you have to speak on the fly without any prep (and bonus: you'll sound smarter). You should absolutely prepare your speech, but there is a point in the preparation where you must trust yourself and put down the index cards.

03 Stand And Deliver

What we do with our bodies tells a story. Crossing your arms looks closed off and defensive. Putting your hands behind you will cause people to distrust you. It's important to allow people to SEE you, which can feel incredibly awkward. You don't want to appear too stiff. You also don't want to seem too casual. The best thing you can do is to get balanced on your own two feet.

Stand with your feet a little more than hips-width distance apart. Roll a little forward onto your toes, and then rock back toward your heels. Then, side to side. Find where your body feels the most centered and balanced. Stack your bones. Your knees over your ankles. Hips over your knees. Shoulders over your hips. Balance the weight of your head over the structure of your bones. Then relax your arms by your side, palms facing slightly forward.

Do this often. In the grocery store. In the kitchen. When it becomes second nature you will start to feel confident in this sturdy and solid stance. This neutral, ready-for-anything posture is your home base.

Unconscious thoughts can sometimes bring to the fore ideas one might easily dismiss as unrealistic.

04 Remember Who Is Listening

The speech you're giving isn't for you. You've been selected to give it, and all eyes are on you, but you are meant to be talking TO other people. If you lose sight of that you will find yourself talking AT them. Youtube videos and Zoom presentations are rife with this talking AT business because we lose the sensory feedback of our audience and have only the tiny red or green dot of the camera to address. It's easy to disconnect from the listeners.

How can you connect with your listeners? With your voice? With your eyes? With your intentions? This is also related to allowing people to SEE you. Awareness is half the battle. A coach can help you activate your presentations.

Sometimes we forget to talk with all of the people in the room. At weddings, the Best Person or Person of Honor often forgets to address the family and friends of the new partner in their toast (I did this!). Executives speak at a company-wide meeting but are often just addressing upper management and not the entire supporting staff.

Work to be inclusive of every body in the room.

05 Watch Yourself

Record yourself as you practice a speech and then watch it a few times. Look for the good stuff. Repeat this. This isn't so you'll hate what you're doing and fix and fix and fix. This is so you'll get comfortable watching yourself.

The more you watch yourself, and accept yourself - your voice, your body, and your presence - the more you'll accept that others will appreciate what you have to offer.

Unconscious thoughts can sometimes bring to the fore ideas one might easily dismiss as unrealistic.

06 Be Truly You

I receive a good many queries about Accent Reduction training and cultivating Executive Presence. I urge you to be thoughtful about these pursuits.

If you're speaking English as a second language, you are a rock star because English is a tough language to learn. In terms of accent reduction, how much is sufficient to reduce? What does it really mean to sound more "American" or "British"? Is it to sound more "white"? Why should you sound more "white"? If you are pronouncing a great many English words incorrectly, you will need to buckle down in your ESL work. But your accent is a part of YOU.

If anyone asks you to develop Executive Presence, press them for a very specific actionable definition. Are there specific skills you need to develop?

An Executive is someone who can be trusted to lead in the good times and the lean times. Executive Presence = Confident Leadership. There are many kinds of leaders out there. What kind of leader are you? Cultivate this.

You are enough. You are delightful. You are better off being you than trying to pretend you're somebody else. Humility and authenticity are more highly-valued than a suit jacket you can barely afford.

07 Bring In The Funny

It feels risky to reveal our sense of humor. Humor shows people who we really are and how we see the world. There are more appropriate times for humor than others, but sometimes nudging the boundaries a little is good for letting down our collective shoulders.

When our audience is distracted they are many separate people. When they are tuned in to a speaker they become a collective and present entity. Laughter connects us.

As a speaker, you control the energy in the room. It's important to read the room. Who are these people? Why did they come here? Are they hot? Are they hungry? Anyone in the theater or comedy biz will tell you that every audience is different. If a joke flops they will still connect with you more for trying. A planned recovery line ("Tough crowd, tough crowd...") can win them over.

Humor in a speech will humanize you. It's worth the risk and if you bring down the house you have everything to gain.

Unconscious thoughts can sometimes bring to the fore ideas one might easily dismiss as unrealistic.

08 Say Nice Things

If you beat up on yourself all the time with harsh thinking, you are going to be hard-pressed to believe yourself when you're mustering up the confidence to give a speech or to walk in proudly for the job interview.

If the messages you are always receiving inside yer noggin' are critical and damning, it's time to switch things up. We wouldn't talk to a child in the same way that we often talk to ourselves. It's incredibly important to change your self-talk immediately.

Start by writing a mini-speech called "My Favorite Things About Me". Give this short speech to yourself often. Recite it out loud. Recite it silently. Say good things about yourself when you're talking to other people. Say good things in your mind while you are brushing your teeth. Say good things a lot so you'll always know that you have YOU in your corner.

09 Skip the Sweet, the Sour, the Salty, the Spicy, the Sloppy, and the Stimulating

Sugar, chocolate, onions, garlic, dairy, pepper, chips, french fries, citrus, booze, and caffeine are ...amazing. They are also terrible dietary choices for presentation days.

Sugar, dairy, spice, and salt can create a bad scene in your gut and when that comes back into your throat at some point (sometimes you aren't even aware of it returning - it can be subtle), you'll find your voice sounds weaker, and will even begin to crack more. Citrus or dairy will put you into an alternating cycle of a dry throat and excess phlegm production. Booze is a bad idea for a number of reasons. Caffeine and nerves are a sweaty combination.

Eat some simple protein. Some rice. A few cooked veggies. Stop eating a couple of hours before you speak. Drink a whole lot of water up to an hour before your presentation. After that, just small sips.

Unconscious thoughts can sometimes bring to the fore ideas one might easily dismiss as unrealistic.

10 Feel The Feelings

You're nervous. You just are. Folks reach out to me to figure out if there's a way to stop feeling nervous. There really isn't. The reason why you're feeling this way is that there are so many unknowns. Public speaking is truly heightened uncertainty! The fear of public speaking has a name: Glossophobia.

It's like a roller coaster. You wait in line and start to psyche yourself out. You feel like you want to change your mind and RUN. Then there's a point of no return - you move forward - you're gonna DO this! And then you're a couple of minutes away from speaking and things get realllly uncertain.

Feeling fear can be a really fantastic way to get to know yourself. Feel it in your body. Relax your shoulders. Unclench your jaw. Breathe your calming breaths. See yourself in this moment. Tell yourself you're into it and that you'll enjoy the ride. You're gonna DO this thing - this crazy thing! You might even find yourself smiling about being in this crazy situation. That's exactly when you know you're ready.

Speaking and communicating well will benefit you in all areas of your life.

You can make great progress and get to a place where you aren't dreading presentations, meetings, or speeches. Communication skills are just that: skills to learn and practice. It might even become fun. It might even become something you love doing.

Reach out to me with questions. It would be a treat to hear from you.

Good luck to you!

aimee@theauthenticcommunicator.com

[agentravensong]

The Hallmark Movie Musical: A Parody

At last, as I promised, here is my pitch for the ultimate homage & critique of the corporate tradition that is the Hallmark Channel’s annual Christmas movies. 

I’m sure your first question is, why a musical? For one, this story is way too complicated for a 90-minute movie. For two, I like musicals, shut up. For three, I feel like the upcoming meta stuff works best in a live format. But mainly, the idea is that this project is being billed as “the culmination of the Hallmark holiday movie tradition”, an idea we’ll get back to later.

The Plot

The play starts with a big old “It’s holiday season in the city” number, centered on our Protagonist, a white (probably blond) woman who I’ve taken to calling Karen. The song quickly introduces us to her current occupation and general goals, as well as our Main Man, who for now I’m calling Chad. As it winds down, we meet Karen’s Best Friend, Sandra (derived from Cassandra), a very smart and observant woman who’s always there to support Karen in her endeavors (even at her own expense) and offer her relationship advice.

Plot twist #1, Sandra is the musical’s actual protagonist. See, she starts to catch on pretty quickly that she’s living in a cheesy, generic, soulless Christmas movie, the kind she’s always derided even as Karen appreciated them. As you can imagine, she doesn’t take the revelation well. For one, she knows that Karen would never want to rush into a relationship, and yet, as the Protagonist of this story, she’d bound to end up soulmates with Chad within the next week or two. So Sandra does everything she can to try and convince Karen of the truth of their reality, or otherwise derail the plot, going so far as to seek help from Chad’s ex-girlfriend, who we’ll refer to as... uh, Vicky, I guess.

In my mind, this makes up most of Act 1, with plenty of opportunities for Sandra to deconstruct tropes along the way. However, during this, Sandra also starts to kind of appreciate the cheesy wholesomeness of her situation. Maybe her life was kinda sh*tty before this started, and now the sh*tiness has entirely faded into the background. So when Karen reveals in a song that she’s figured it out, but that she’s accepted it, because it means her relationship will be perfect for her and she’s guaranteed to be happy for the rest of her life... Sandra can see where she’s coming from. 

But Sandra doesn’t trust that this will all work out perfectly. Who’s to say happily ever after will continue after the “movie” ends? And what about everyone else, the “side characters” in this story? Will their lives just stagnate once their role in Karen’s arc is over? Surely Karen can see it isn’t fair that she gets to be the center of the universe, right?

And that’s where plot twist #2 - or rather #3 - comes in. Remember how I said that this project is billed, even in the opening number itself, as “the culmination of the Hallmark holiday movie tradition”? Well, as formulaic as these movies are, you can’t fit every single cliche into one movie. And so Act 1 ends with Sandra’s attempts to sabotage the plot essentially causing an emergency system reset. The closing number of the act has some characters excited that it will soon be “their turn”.

We find out what the heck that means in Act 2, where the characters’ roles have been switched around. Vicky is now the Protagonist. She has a small group of friends instead of just one Best Friend. One of those friends is another former protagonist, maybe one of them was Karen’s ex in the previous timeline...

And the other friend is Sandra. Functionally, her role has hardly changed, unlike everyone else. Her mission from the start of the act (once she figures out what’s up) is to search for Karen, but she also can’t help but wonder why she’s stuck in the same position. 

We find out part of the reason why in plot twist #4, which would have been pretty heavily foreshadowed up to this point. Like, maybe Karen made a joke about how weirdly good Sandra is at helping her with relationships when, as far as she knows, Sandra’s never been in a serious one. She’s certainly never seemed that interested in boys. Or maybe at one point, Sandra made an offhand comment to Karen about how all her previous relationships with guys have ended poorly, has she ever considered dating outside that pool? Karen’s just like no, Sandra shrugs, and the conversation moves on.

Yes, Sandra’s a lesbian. That’s why she’s never gotten to be the lead (though apparently, the company is looking to start producing movies with LGBTQ+ characters? So maybe we’d frame it like “well maybe you could have been now if you hadn't also ruined things last time?” Depends.) I’m not sure whether it would be best to have her be crushing on Karen during the events of the play; it almost seems too obvious, and I don’t want Sandra’s motivations for trying to free their reality from the Hallmark movie constraints to be superseded by her just wanting to date her friend. But I think it would be nice to have Sandra get with someone by the play’s end, and not just a rando.

Sandra (and maybe the other members of the friend group) sing a song about how not conforming to society’s mold of the “average”, “normal” person has made them feel alienated, how they don’t get these kinds of fairytale endings, even in fiction. From there, she and the gang of not-quite-lead-material formulate a plan to change the plot. I haven’t thought out the details of all this yet, but long story short...

It goes wrong. Really wrong. When it looks like the story is going to reset again, the characters give their all to stop it, but that just causes the world itself to collapse. We’re left with just Sandra, and maybe Vicky, on stage.

Then Karen reappears. She reveals the reason she was absent from the last retelling of the story was that she essentially gave up her role so that Sandra wouldn’t be punished for going against the script. Of course, that’s now become voided by Sandra’s actions, and Karen’s upset about it. She and Vicky guilt Sandra over having ruined things for everyone. 

Here’s where things get tricky. I laid out what I want the message of the musical to be in a post yesterday, but figuring out how to implement it in the play itself has been puzzling me. I think I’ll save going over that for its own section. In the meantime, I can really only imagine one of two endings for the musical:

A. The characters reboot the musical themselves, bringing in the side characters and giving them equal creative control, so they can create stories for everyone.

B. The characters escape the restrictions of their reality, entering back into the “real world”. Maybe add an epilogue-type scene where we see Sandra has gotten into the movie-making business, where she makes fun, lighthearted movies featuring diverse casts.

The Characters

This section is for elaborating on aspects of Sandra and Karen’s characterization and development that would have slowed down the flow of the plot summary.

Sandra

As previously mentioned, Sandra is basically your stereotypical Ravenclaw, witty almost to the point of pretentiousness. She’s meant to be the surrogate for all the people who think the Hallmark movies are nothing more than soulless, indistinguishable, products, the person who would only watch these movies to roast them. 

That being said, she also has a lot of Hufflepuff qualities. She’s hardworking and supremely loyal to her friends, always looking for ways to help them with their relationships and their careers, even at her own expense. Spending time helping Karen with projects instead of studying for her own exams, giving up opportunities so her friends have a shot at them, etc. 

As a result, Sandra has learned to roll with the punches and make the most of the worst situations, to the point where she gets enjoyment and pride out of it. She’s always looking for new opportunities but has the patience and forethought to think them through before jumping on them. As long as she can make life easier for her friends and give them more options, she can handle any personal repercussions. They find ways to pay her back eventually, but she really doesn’t need it... at least, that’s what she tells herself.

This is part of why she’s ticked off at the reveal that Karen is happy to be the Protagonist of a Hallmark movie. The idea that you’d want to give up your agency entirely to follow a set script so that you don’t have to try anymore; Sandra can’t imagine ever taking that opportunity, even after warming up to the idea of Hallmark movies as a fun thing to watch. And it’s not like Karen’s life was that difficult before, in comparison to her’s at least. Can she really not handle it, even with everything Sandra sacrifices for her best friend? How can she be happy, while being explicitly complicit in her friends getting sidelined?

As the musical goes on, Sandra acknowledges her desire to be in the spotlight more of the time and becomes more of a self-advocate, taking a leadership role in Act 2′s friend gang and factoring her own wants more into making decisions (like when she abandons the story to search for Karen). With the realization that part of the reason she can’t be in the spotlight within the constraints of her reality is something innate about her that can’t be changed, her ire towards the system becomes more focused and less petty, which is what convinces the other members of the friend group to take a risk in trying to change the story.

Again, I’ll save the ending for another section. In short, Sandra’s arc goes like this:

Starts out hating Hallmark movies, and always willing to concede to her friends

As soon as she realizes what her life has become, she fights against it in petty ways

Starts gaining an appreciation for Hallmark movies as a form of fun escapism, but still can’t imagine it being her whole life

Post reset, she becomes more of a self-advocate

After plot twist #4, she directs ire back towards the Hallmark-ness of her world, but this time because of how it excludes people from its fantasy

Works with the friend gang to change the direction of the story to try and make their world more just (but maybe she gets a bit dictatorial herself? The classic “protagonist goes too far” thing?)

After things go wrong, she admits that she was initially kind of an ass to Karen and that her initial actions were not committed with the best intentions, but she still stands up for her actions in Act 2 (or most of them, depending on how much of an ass she was to the friend gang)

By the end, she’s learned to appreciate cheesy movies, but more importantly, to self-advocate; she’s still committed to helping her friends, but now she’s also looking at how to do so on a systemic level

Others

Karen is your typical Hallmark movie protagonist: a white, middle class, cis woman who loves Christmas and Christmas movies. As I briefly touched on earlier, she’s benefitted from a lot of privilege, and the support of her large pool of family and friends. She doesn’t have any long-term aspirations, partly because she tends to stress out over the littlest things.

That being said, she’s definitely had hardship in terms of love; she tends to get invested in relationships super quickly, and so when she realizes the guy she’s dating isn’t right for her, things get messy. She’s spent years looking for the perfect man, and when she first meets Chad, she would never have considered him an option. At least on a conscious level. But after their first meeting went poorly, she finds him growing on her quickly... too quickly.

It doesn’t take much of Sandra’s meddling for Karen to figure out what’s up. At first, she isn’t sure how to feel about it. But she comes to see that being in a Hallmark movie, for her, basically means she’s living a slightly-improved, practically stress-free version of her life, where she’s guaranteed her soulmate. Even if she found a way to give it up, why would she ever want to? Sandra seems to be the only person who’s upset over it, and she is her best friend... but if they really are best friends, then surely Sandra will learn to just accept it and be happy for her, right? It’s not like this will make Sandra’s life actively worse, and she’ll always been willing to take a step back so Karen could succeed. Why would this time be any different?

As you might be able to discern from all that, Karen’s arc is learning not to take her friends for granted and to not see herself as the center of the universe. That being said, she also has to learn a form of self-advocacy, to become more willing to take risks on her deeper desires rather than just settling for “good enough”. Some of this growth happens while she’s absent during Act 2 (maybe there could be a small scene where we see just her, observing the story as it unfolds and giving some commentary?) and the rest happens after the friend gang’s failure.

I honestly haven’t thought much at all about what Chad is like, other than the same obvious basic factors, so we’ll just move past him. Vicky is similar to Karen on a basic level, hence why she gets to become Protagonist in Act 2, except that she’s the Protagonist stereotype who’s all business and thinks Christmas cheer is *gasp* overrated. 

I’m not sure yet where Vicky should be on the hero-villain spectrum. Does she sympathize with Sandra from the start, but temporarily become somewhat power-hungry when she gets to be Protagonist? Or was she always just waiting for it to be her turn again? Is she tired of the cycle, or is she glad to benefit from it? Who even is her love interest in Act 2? And then there are all the members of the friend group to consider... I think I’ll just cut myself off here, this is already way too long.

The Message

I told you we’d get back to this. Gonna start by copy-pasting what I put in yesterday’s post:

There’s definitely a place for lighthearted, straightforward stories that end in a happily ever after. BUT it would be cool if, without changing that, they A. didn’t churn out 30+ of the things a year, instead putting that extra time & effort into making each individual film stand out a little more, and B. weren’t almost always about the same white, middle class, cishet women, even if those people are currently the main demographic.

Or to put it another way, “These movies are fun, but they could be more interesting and meaningful if not for capitalism.”

...The question becomes, how do we get across all this nuance in this hypothetical show? For one, there’d probably need to be some critique of the capitalist ideas that lead to these problems with the movies woven throughout the plot. How much of our criticism should be focused on the flaws of the Hallmark Channel brand in particular, and how much should be more generalized?

And then we get back to the climax. Karen is angry at Sandra for letting her hatred of Hallmark movies ruin things for everyone else, and Vicky is angry at Sandra for wanting to make the story all about her. Sandra’s response to them is going to have to convey her development, how she has grown to appreciate those kinds of cheesy predictable stories... but she’s still critical of how they’re mass-produced to appeal to a specific demographic and aren’t that inclusive. A part of her would like to be the hero of one of these movies, just once, but she’s far from the only person left out by these stories. 

Where do we go from there? You’d probably have to address the “why not make your own story instead of taking over ours” argument, and... you see, it’s difficult to be nuanced and entertaining.

Of course, this is just my first or second draft of how to put together a story based on these ideas. If I ever actually made this a thing, the final plot would probably be structured very differently. For one thing, I’d need to watch a lot more Hallmark movies. In the hour of research that I did yesterday, recorded in this document (which y’all are free to comment on and add suggestions to), I discovered a podcast that discusses several individual Hallmark movies that I might just have to binge over the upcoming winter break. So that’s where we’re at now. I hope somebody enjoyed reading my ramblings about a project that will never come to be.

[bioswear]

Shitty game dev experiences

So like, for the past 6 months I’ve been stuck in this horrible student game dev hell that I’ll call “Tex Blechs”. It is a game that was pitched with ZERO substance, and the team who pitched it only liked it because one of the people on that team’s fiancé pitched the title pun (Which is Just Tex Mechs, which also seems mildly racist?) and the stakeholders (aka our professors, aka 3 white men) LOVED the pun, even tho they had no idea what the game was about. They literally said “idk what Tex Mechs is about, but I want to play it.” Like?? No??? Which is red flag #1. So they pick that as one of the three games that was chosen for us to develop.

The game designer for Tex Blechs is the person who pitched the pun, and was also the game designer for our last, cohort-wide student game, which was equally lackluster in quality, overscoped, and lacking in true substance. All of which would be fine I suppose if she didn’t overscope all of her projects, since it’s a student game. So, she has this massive game idea for a project that’s really only meant to be 10-15 minutes of quality, solid gameplay and to this day, it still is not.

Let me say that the original content she wanted was: 2 different levels (a farm and a canyon) with 5 arenas, Left4Dead style, 1 tutorial level, five different weapons, four different kinds of enemies, and an opening cutscene for the game AND an end cutscene. In retrospect, this wouldn’t be a lot for a bigger dev team, but this team has 16 people. We only have three artists total, not including myself and the VFX artist, who is a level designer in the program. That’s a big fuckin order. We have 16 weeks for this game. That is not a lot of time. At all. To model/sculpt, retopologize, UV unwrap and texture, rig and skin, and then optimize a handful of assets to a quality that can be considered “Steam-worthy”. Oh, right, our end goal is to get greenlig for steam publication, which counts as a shipped game for our resume.

The level designers on this team are stressed as fuck. They have had to constantly crunch and remake arenas the entire game, and never have actually had the time to polish the environments as well as they could have because theyre constantly working on refining combat, set-dressing, and other such things. They have been a sprint behind because they had to remake the arenas, which is a canyon environment. (And then the professors/stakeholders complain that it “doesn’t feel like Texas”; what the fuck is Texas supposed to feel like? Texas doesn’t have canyons, Texas is flat as fuck)

I am art lead for this Tex Blechs, and good lord is it a beating everyday. If I were an object, I’d be a piñata. Despite my efforts to try and convince the GD to scope down, each time I’d be met with “well we can just reuse stuff” or “as the game designer, I want this to be in the game” and I’m listened to, but I’m not HEARD. It’s only just RECENTLY, out of 6 months development time, that she’s decided to cut stuff. But all the stuff she’s cut so far, has been things that are already completed, and have been for a few milestones, because they “weren’t working out.” She didn’t even tell the producer she had cut this stuff, and I had to be the one to tell the producer instead, which was a surprise to her.

I have been a really good lead for my artists, and one of the most organized leads during the entire project. This fucker is like “but you’re not doing your job because you’re checked out and frustrated at this game.” Which is a horribly large and inaccurate assumption about me, as I do my job and I do it well to the point that in my peer evals, people have called me “a good lead,” “willing to help her team with extra assets,” “a good advocate for the art team,” etc. So I try to tell him that I can have an opinion but when I’m in the room I’m doing my job with minimal complaint. And this fucker SITS IN OUR ROOM during the workday because so many people have complained about the sloppiness of the game designer and the producer.

Anyway, my artists and I had this big meeting about the scope of the game and the concerns we all shared, which was that there was no feasible way to do everything that was planned. So we have a meeting with the game designer involved, too. And we express our concerns, and frustrations, and need for less content if we want to make a good, polished looking game. And this bitch? She turns it into a sob story about how hard it is to be a game designer and how it’s hard to look at the big picture and that it was never her idea she just had the title, and that she didn’t even know what the game was supposed to be, etc. Meanwhile, none of the artists are feeling sympathy because she never once answered any of our questions, and only turned it into a sob story about how hard her job was. Frustration point #500. This is back in September.

Things still don’t improve until like, a week ago. We have team retros where we go over what went well, wrong, and to do better next time for each milestone.

Every. Fucking. Time. Someone says that the game is still overscoped and that someone or multiple people have crunched because they had to. And still NO CHANGES. No intervention from faculty, who wants to slough off the responsibility that they set us up for failure onto us. NOTHING.

So naturally my artists and I form a solidarity about the shit working conditions and often bitch about stuff, mostly outside of class, where we’re allowed to.

So today one of the bitch ass white men who picked the game pulls me aside and says that I’m being too negative because I often talk about the flaws of the production and development environment, and that it’s affecting the rest of the team, but this is absolutely not true in any way. I try to tell him that it’s not just me, and I’m not the cause of the team wide low morale, and that I’m not their ringleader or telling them how to feel. But he still insists that it must be my negativity, and not the months of constant crunch, overtime, overscoping, disorganization and incompetency of the other two leads that’s obviously the problem. That would be too easy.

He says that, because I’m the lead, that my negative comments are affecting the other artists as if they aren’t grown-ass adults who can formulate thoughts and opinions on their own. He’s treating me like I’m some big bad ringleader and the artists are my lackeys, but really they just hate BULLSHIT, which has been 90% of this games development.

He also has been stalking and monitoring my twitter because the producer on my team is spineless and frail and snitched me out during her production class, and tried to use some of my personal opinion posts against me today, too? Saying that they’ve been making their rounds to the entire team and that it’s hurting my credibility with them, which is also, again, not true, as nobody on my team follows me on Twitter and that a good majority of my team also has the same kind of feelings that I do about the games development shitshow (they are much less verbal during class, much like I am much less verbal about it during class).

Anyway, that’s been my fucking life for the past 6 months.

[acaseforpencils]

Jason Chatfield.

Bio: I grew up in the far flung suburbs of Perth, in Western Australia, and used to spend my paper route money on MAD Magazines (I cheaped-out and stole my dentist’s waiting room issues of the New Yorker. I think I was the only kid who looked forward to going to the dentist).

I moved to New York in 2014 and started pitching to the mag in person. I’m not sure Bob liked me, so I went back to pitching via email. Then I went in on his last day and finally sold my first piece. I feel like it was his final f—k you to the magazine. “Here! Have a Chatfield!” 

Find this print here!

The cartoon was a goofy play on Vlad the Impaler. 

I didn’t sell to the magazine again until last month, but I’ve had a handful sold as dailies. And I’m published in MAD often, so they’ve clearly done away with any of their standards.

When I’m not drawing gag cartoons I write and draw a syndicated legacy strip called Ginger Meggs which I took over 10 years ago. It’s been around since 1921 and now appears daily in 34 countries. He’s kind of an Australian version of Dennis the Menace, except he predates him by about 30 years.

Tools of choice: For drawing/roughs, I use a Prismacolor Turquoise clutch pencil with a red lead and try to find some paper with a little bit of tooth. The mixed media pads at Blick do the trick nicely.

I ink using a Uni-ball Vision Elite Stick Roller Ball Pen… or a Pigma Micron 03. 

DO NOT use the Uni-Ball Vision Rollerball Pens, Fine Point (0.7mm) if you’re traveling. They explode on planes. And ruin your copy of The New Yorker.

For a wash, I just use watercolor and whatever brush is lying around. Nothing fancy. There’s a scanning app on my phone called “Adobe Scan” which does a nice job of scanning line-art into a PDF when I’m out of the studio and need to email in a quick rough.

I use a Wacom Mobilestudio Pro for finished artwork. I like to get out of the studio and work from a bar or restaurant, so it helps that I can take that with me. I use a little glove that I got on Amazon so I don’t grease up the screen, and the felt-tip nib that comes in the pen-holder makes the friction between the stylus and the screen more like pencil on paper. Unfortunately, they’re not waterproof, as I found on a recent vacation…

My wife plays piano and sings at bars around the city so I’ll often sit at the bar during her sets and draw. Digital/Traditional depends on what deadlines are most pressing. (She has a weekly residency in Astoria —if anyone’s interested in going, let me know!)

A lot of people email me for advice about tablets —I’ve been trialling/demo-ing Wacom products for 15 years— I think they’re great. If you’re married to doing stuff by hand but want to colour digitally, you can get a decent tablet without going broke. Depends on your workflow.

Writing Desk: My wife and I were living upstairs in 5A when my neighbour in 4B died. He was a brilliant poet and had an incredible old writing desk. It’s the only thing that was left in the apartment, so I’m looking after it ’til his grandson moves in at the end of our lease. I work for countless hours at this old thing. It’s beat up, but I’ve patched it together enough that it won’t collapse and bury me mid-brushstroke. I’ve stuck a few of my favourite toons on the top of it.

Tool I wish I could use better: My brain. It really is a sack of cats. Whenever I want to sit and do work, it clocks off. Then it comes up with a pearler of an idea at 3 in the morning when I’m trying to sleep. I write it down in my phone, but autocorrect makes it indecipherable by morning.

I like working with my writer friend, Scott. We both do comedy at night and have developed a nice short-hand. We also seem to have the same library of references and can build on each others’ premises, which tames my sack-of-cats.

Tool I wish existed: The Deadline Extender.® I’ve never missed a deadline, but that said… an extra 3 or 4 minutes to allow for a terrible wifi connection, or a errant scanner wouldn’t go astray.

Also: The Deadline Extender® PREMIUM: Let’s you go back in time to when you were procrastinating and slap yourself in the face. $30 p/month.

Tricks: Ok, well. This is going to sound a bit Dalton Trumbo, but bear with me: I do my best work…in the bath.The most productive 3 hours of my week are during Scotchbath Sunday; an immoveable chunk of time on Sunday evening whereby I lock myself in the bathroom, run a bath, lug my drawing stuff onto a bit of wood that sits over the bath, and just write and draw. Nothing else. I write weeks worth of my syndicated comic strip (Ginger Meggs), I write New Yorker cartoons, scribble up roughs for dailies— and when I feel like I’ve earned it (usually 2 hours in) I tap the side of the bath three times, and my wife peels herself from her piano and I unlock the door to a nice big glass of scotch. It’s a hell of a carrot on a stick to work towards when you’re stuck. (PS. Lest you think I’m some kind of Don Draper-era misogynist; the scotch reward part was her idea. I think she realized it keeps me in the bath and out of her way.)

Anyway. It’s a great way to switch gears creatively. It’s like being on an aeroplane. No wifi, no phones — just the work you need to get done. Get involved. #ScotchBathSunday.

Oh! And if I get my deadlines done for the week, I have a small budget for a solo lunch somewhere where I can eat cheese and draw. I really didn’t know cheese ’til I moved to America. (And yes, I’ve already been to Wisconsin. Good Lord.)

Tips? I always tell younger artists to not even think about touching a drawing tablet until they’ve learned to draw by hand first. Otherwise they’ll always be drawing away, knowing they have the insurance of the CTRL+Z key at their disposal if they screw up a line. That’s not a good habit to have when you’re working to a deadline. But, once you do know how to draw, by all means dive head-first into the digital realm. It’s incredible. Procreate, Sketchbook or Photoshop are all great.

Misc: One of the hangovers from working in advertising illustration is that I’ve had to be a bit of a chameleon style-wise for the last 15 years and haven’t allowed myself to just settle into one style. Lately, I’ve just decided to say “Bugger it!” and try and find a loose, consistent style that I’m comfortable with, that’s an apt conduit to my silly ideas.

I always loved George Booth’s line, and his ability to create a scene with so much movement but just at the right moment in time. Also Sam Gross’ dark, hilarious cartoons with perfect line-economy. And I’d give my left arm (I draw with my right) to know how Barry Blitt has so much control with his washes…

Chatfield’s portrait of Sam Gross

While I’m geeking out, I love seeing younger cartoonists find their feet and thrive in a style that just feels like they’re speaking to you— Ellis J. Rosen, Sofia Warren, Hilary Fitzgerald Campbell, Jason Katzenstein, Amy Kurzweil, and a seemingly endless list of talented younger artists who are putting in the work are a big inspiration. 

I know it should be Steig or Thurber or Addams, but my favourite cartoonist is Sergio Aragones.

I was always so enamoured of MAD growing up and studied the lines of Jack Davis, Mort Drucker, Al Jaffee and the Usual Gang of Idiots. I remember being so frustrated I couldn’t even come close to getting my work to look like theirs, but I think I found a style somewhere in between when I fell short. 

I think Wil McPhail’s poses are masterful, and I wish I knew how how the hell he did that. One day I’ll trudge up to England and knock on his door to ask him. I find myself doubled-over at John Cuneo’s Instagram, and Ed Steed’s absurdly funny gags. I have a slew of toons I’ve torn out of years’ worth of magazines and taped to my studio wall, or my zillion year-old writing desk. I’m constantly humbled by how generous and welcoming the existing crop of New Yorker cartoonists have been to a goofy Aussie immigrant — Joe Dator, Matt Diffee and Pat Byrnes, Mort Gerberg and an ever-growing list of prolific, talented cartoonists who make the 99% weekly rejection tolerable.

I’ve made some of my closest friends and have been lucky enough to meet my cartooning heroes through the National Cartoonists Society. I got to spend a lot of time with Sergio at the Lakes International Comic Art Festival in the UK last year which made my year. We were signing together for a whole afternoon and I spent more time geeking out with him than signing.

Okay. Enough drooling. Sorry.

I’m a fan of cartoonists.

Website, etc. I have a weekly podcast where I throw around ideas for New Yorker cartoons with a fellow comedian and writer, Scott Dooley. It’s called “Is There Something In This?” It’s a bit of fun. We don’t take ourselves too seriously, but we do take the art of writing gags very seriously. It’s an extremely difficult skill to master, and we’re virtually zygotes at it. We have lots of listeners now, which is bewildering. Talking about drawing is like dancing about architecture, but here we are. Anyway you can find it on iTunes or wherever you waste time listening to podcasts.

My website is jasonchatfield.com and my comedy stuff is up at jasonchatfieldcomedy.com  ( I’ve been doing stand-up comedy for 11 years. If anyone wants to come see a show, hit me up! I’ll put you on the door). My instagram is @jasonchatfield. I’m still trolling the British chap who has the @jasonchatfield handle on Twitter to no avail. To that end, I’m @jason_chatfield on Twitter.

If you want more art supplies in your life, A Case for Pencils is on Instagram and Twitter.  You can also find me, Jane (the person who created/edits this blog), on Twitter here, which is where I stick the paintings that I’ve been doing instead of interviewing people consistently (I needed to balance working on other people’s work and my own work!). Oh, and If you’d like to support this blog, which is always very appreciated, there are many different ways to do so, which you can find here!

[thegreatwhiteferret]

Attention

Summary: Richie chose drugs over his relationship with Stan, but can't stand the thought of him moving on. Now he will do anything to get Stan's attention back on him.

A/N: It’s a lot of feelings and smut y’all and I am sorry in advance. [NSFW, Aged up to 18, right before High School graduation. Drug use, Underage Drinking, Angst, Revenge Porn, and Feelings.]  

NSFW under cut...

Stan was pacing the floor. Watching the phone. He would pause every so often to straighten something on the coffee table, his overwhelming need to have everything organized ticking away at him even in moments like this. Richie was supposed to call. He was going to go home, check in to see how bad his parental situation was, and then call Stan. That was two and a half hours ago. He sighed, sitting down on the edge of the couch and ran his hands over his face. Richie was flaking more and more as of late. Coming up with weak excuses and bailing on their plans. Stan missed him, missed the crazy chaotic boy that held his heart.

When he had waited three hours to no avail, Stan decided he was done. He trudged up the stairs and ripped off his sweater and ass accentuating pants, it was Richie’s favorite outfit, that’s why he had worn it. There was no point in being dressed up now. He stared at his reflection in the mirror above his dresser.

He had carefully groomed himself when he had gotten home from school from top to bottom. He had spent 45 minutes trying to tame the curls on top of his head, the corkscrews were resistant to product and still popped up all over the place. He had attempted to tame his lower half as well, carefully shaving, cleaning, and prepping so that he would be ready for Richie later. He was hoping that tonight they would be spending some time making his prep worthwhile. They hadn’t slept together in almost a month, Richie always coming up for some excuse as to why he had to head home. It killed Stan, he was starting to think that something was wrong with him, that he couldn’t please his boyfriend anymore. He was hoping that tonight he could break them out of the slump and get back to who they were, but now he knew that it was a wasted effort.

Stan shook the thoughts of his missing boyfriend out of his mind. He pulled a polo and some khakis on, making sure everything was straight. He marched down the stairs and grabbed his jacket, slipping his shoes on by the door, and calling a goodbye to his parents over his shoulder. He headed out into the cold, and began walking towards the Derry Arcade, where he knew he would find Bill and Mike.

He could see the lights of the arcade in the distance when he heard a loud commotion in the alley between two buildings. He knew that he should keep walking but couldn’t help himself, he looked over at the noise and saw a group of kids whooping and hollering. He froze. In the middle of the group, laughing loudly was none other than his boyfriend, Richie Tozier. Stan looked on in horror, this is what he had waited for? His boyfriend, who was living it up with these random kids? Then it took a turn for the worse, Stan looked closer, and noticed that some of the hoodlums appeared to be snorting a white powder off the hood of a beaten up car.

Stan watched as Richie stepped up to the car and took a long hit, closing his eyes in bliss, when Richie opened his eyes again they met Stan’s. He panicked.

“Shit! Stan! Stanley!” He called, rushing towards the boy, but Stan was already running. He felt Richie grab his arm, damn him and those super long legs. Richie pulled Stan around to face him and was just about to speak when Stan lifted his hand and slapped him right across his face, Richie stumbled back and grabbed his cheek.

“WHAT THE FUCK, RICHIE?” Stan wailed, “I wait at home all night for you to call so that we can hang out, and this is what you’re fucking doing?”

“I can explain, Stan...it’s not what you think, you’re overreacting.” Richie slurred, trying to calm his boyfriend down while his mind was beginning to fully swirl from the bump of cocaine he had just done.

“Are you fucking kidding me right now? I’m overreacting? Drugs, Rich. You’re doing drugs.” Stan scoffed, wrapping his arms around himself as the chill from the air and his boyfriend’s demeanor began reaching his bones.

“Jesus Christ, Uris. You’re so fucking uptight.” Richie responded, “So dramatic about everything. It’s just a bit of coke, it’s not a big deal.” Stan rolled his eyes, this was so like Richie, deflecting his own issues by insulting those who actually gave a fuck about him.

“If this is no big deal, why didn’t you tell me? We tell eachother everything! If you have a problem…”

“I don’t have a problem, I can stop whenever I want.” Richie cut him off. “And maybe I didn’t tell you because I knew that you would be a little bitch about this. Looks like I was right.”

“Fuck you, Richie.” Stan said, tears threatening to well up in his eyes, he willed his body to keep them in, “I’m done. Enjoy your fucking drugs and new friends, obviously they are more important than our relationship.” With than Stan turned and walked away, not even turning around to see Richie’s reaction.

*

A giggle erupted from Stan’s mouth. It was an uncharacteristic sound, so free and pure, but it was certainly a welcome change. He writhed and wiggled as fingers pressed into his rib cage. His eyes were watering from laughing so hard.

“All you have to do, Stanny, is say that DC is better than Marvel.” The owner of the fingers chided, digging them in at just the right spot for Stan to squeal again.

“Not a chance, Archie. Marvel has way better storylines and character development! Batman is just a rich guy with stupid gadgets!” He protested through his giggles. Archie sighed and relented. “You give up way too easy.” Stan laughed when he caught his breath and a tongue was stuck out at him in response.

“Good lord, why don’t you too just make out already?” Bev joked from behind the magazine that she was reading while sprawled out on overstuffed chair in the Hanlon’s den. Stan and Archie both blushed and moved away from each other slightly. Mike gave her a pointed look. “I was just joking. Lighten up, would ya?”

“S-so, are w-we carpooling to B-Ben’s party this w-w-weekend?” Bill asked, attempting to change the topic and relieve some of the awkwardness. Mike plopped down next to him on the couch and wrapped his arm around his shoulders.

“Sure, Babe, we can take the farm truck, all of us should fit if we squeeze in.” Mike suggested, looking around for answers from the remaining members of their crew. Bev gave a thumbs up and Eddie agreed as long as he was allowed to sit in a seat with an actual seat belt.

“Is it okay if I meet you there a little bit later?” Archie whispered to Stan, “I have to spend all day Saturday working on my lap report for physics, someone has been distracting me from actually getting it done.” Stan ducked his head and blushed a little bit. He had really enjoyed getting to know Archie, it had helped pull him out from his three month long depressive episode after splitting up with Richie. He felt good, really good. His worries melted away when he was talking to the other boy, he was so easy to talk to and be himself with. He never called him over dramatic either.

“Hmm, well whoever is distracting you must be pretty awesome.” Stan winked at him and Archie rolled his eyes. “But yeah, that’s totally fine. Ben’s parties usually amp up around ten or so.”

They hung out a little longer, talking about school work and the latest gossip, before they started to break off so that they could get home before dark. Stan and Archie headed out last, leaving Bill and Mike to be the adorably disgusting boyfriends that they were. They walked down the dirt road leading back to town. Stan kicked a rock with his shoe, mind swirling in his head.

“Penny for your thoughts, Uris?” Archie asked, giving the curly haired boy a sideways glance. Stan looked back over at him, compiling his thoughts.

“I was just thinking about how grateful I am to have met you.” Stan replied, carefully gauging Archie’s reaction. They hadn’t talked extensively about their respective sexualities. Archie knew that Stan was gay, and had heard from the other Losers that he had gone through an awful break up shortly before they had met. Stan knew that Archie wasn’t so cut and dry, he had had a serious girlfriend before he had moved to Derry, but he had been flirting with Stan...unless Stan had read the signs wrong and he was just super friendly.

“I’m glad I met you too. Moving here was super hard, but knowing you has made it way easier.” Archie said sincerely, stopping in his tracks and grabbing onto Stan’s hand. Stan cocked his head to the side, wondering why they had stopped and then he felt lips press to his own. He responded quickly, Both boys melted into the kiss, and Stan pushed them backwards until he had Archie pressed up against a tree.

They made out for a little longer before they actually walked home; faces flushed, stomachs jittery, and hands intertwined.

*

“H-hey, Stan. C-can I talk t-to you for a m-minute?” Bill asked as they unloaded books into their lockers and got ready for their calculus class.

“Sure, Bill, what’s up?” Stan asked, putting his textbooks back in schedule order on the shelf of his locker. There was never a situation that didn’t improve with organization.

“It’s s-shit, but I t-thought that I s-should tell you b-before someone else d-does…” Bill started, before being cut off.

“Well what do we have here? If it isn’t the Jewish cum guzzling twink of Derry?” Henry Bowers laughed and his crew chimed in.

“Look at this little faggot, he just wants to be on his knees.” Victor Criss spat, “Such a hungry little cumslut.”

“Look at those shorts, so tight, however do you hide your girly panties under there?” Belch added, “Such a little fag, I bet you want to wear bras too.”

They continue to laugh loudly and hurl homophobic insults at him as he rushed down the hallway, Bill hot on his tail. He could feel tears prickling his eyes and was grateful when Bill pulled him into a bathroom and locked the door behind them. He quickly checked to ensure they were alone before full on breaking down.

“What the Hell, Bill? What’s going on?” Stan asked, heaving out breaths and tears flowing down his cheeks.

“St-stan this is w-what I w-was trying to t-tell y-you…” Bill started, sighing before pushing on, “R-Richie has been s-saying some n-na-nasty things about y-you. About w-what you two w-would do t-together.” Stan looked at him questioningly, “S-sexually.”

“Why would he fucking do that?” Stan’s eyes were wide. He had been called homophobic things before, Hell, the whole damn Losers Club had, but never things so specific. Who knew what all Richie had revealed.

“I...I d-don’t know, S-Stan, b-b-but it gets w-worse.” How could it get worse? Stan’s thought was answered when Bill pulled out a folded piece of paper and handed it to Stan. He unfolded the paper carefully and almost puked when he saw what had been photocopied onto it.

There in black and white on the paper was a picture of Stan, on his knees, licking Richie’s dick. He could just make out the lacey panties and stockings that he was wearing, and the mascara that had made his eyes super defined. He recognized the picture. Richie had begged him to let him take a picture of him with his brand new Polaroid camera. Stan had protested, telling him that he didn’t want something like that getting into the wrong hands, but Richie had promised and told Stan how happy it would make him, so he had relented. That was yet another huge mistake that he had made with Richie. Stan threw the paper on the ground and started heaving into the sink. When he had emptied the contents of his stomach, he turned to look at Bill.

“Where did you get this? Are they everywhere? Is there more?” He was panicked. He couldn’t believe that Richie would release this picture.

“T-they were all o-over the q-quad earlier. W-we g-grabbed as m-many as we c-could, but a w-whole bunch of k-kids had t-them.” Bill looked apologetic. “I’m s-sorry, Stan.” Stan’s heart hurt so badly, he felt so betrayed. He had trusted Richie because he had loved him with his whole heart, and Richie was trying to destroy him. He just couldn’t figure out why.

Bill agreed to skip the rest of his classes and take Stan home. He wasn’t going to be able to focus anyway, knowing how badly his friend was hurting. They had almost made it out of the school, when they saw Bev and Ben walking down the hallway. Bev rushed forward and wrapped Stan in her arms, he broke down again and sobbed into her shoulder, any hopes of keeping his dignity were gone.

“I’m so sorry, Stan. I can’t believe that he did this.” She said stroking his back. “Why don’t we go get a whole bunch of ice cream and watch movies. Would that be okay?” Stan nodded and let his friends take him home and take care of him.

*

Ben had told Stan that he didn’t have to make an appearance at his party. That everyone would understand, but Stan wasn’t letting Richie’s shit ruin his life. He was going and he was going to get blitzed out drunk and was going to have fun with his possible new boyfriend. Archie for his part had been super sweet and supportive of Stan. He swore that he hadn’t seen the pictures and had shut down anyone who had tried to spread rumors about his sweet boy.

So Stan was going to this party. He was going to drink his fruity cocktails and dance with Archie, and do whatever the fuck he wanted. He was done letting Richie Tozier control what he did. He put on his tightest pants, black jeans that Bev had bought him from a trendy shop in Portland that made his ass look fantastic, with his favorite pink lace panties underneath. He slipped a black undershirt on and then buttoned up a denim shirt. His curls actually stayed manageable for once, and he swiped a bit of mascara on. It wasn’t the style that he would usually go for, especially not in public, but he felt good.

He raced down the stairs when he heard Mike honk the horn of the trunk and jumped into the backseat with Eddie and Bev. Bev looked over his outfit and smiled at him, he pressed a kiss to her cheek in thanks, and then sat back preparing himself for the night ahead of him.

Stan was beyond tipsy. He was feeling himself. Eddie had tried switching him to water a while ago, but Stan had waited for him to turn his back and had replaced the water with vodka. He could feel the music pulsing through his body and kept thinking of the cute freckle faced redhead that would be showing up soon. He was going to show Archie a good time. Bev had laughed hysterically when he had voiced this out loud, but he didn’t even care.

Suddenly there was a loud bang as a group of grungy looking teens burst into the party. Stan scoffed, at their rudeness before sneaking a bit more alcohol into his cup. When he turned back around, he saw him. Tall and gangly, dark messy curls spilling into his eyes and thick glasses. It was Richie. The other Losers noticed his arrival as well.

“Shit, Stan. I swear I didn’t know that he was going to be here.” Ben sounded like he was panicking, like it was his fault that Richie was a piece of trash asshole. Stan knew that Ben was sincere, he wasn’t mad at him.

Stan was suddenly overcome with rage towards Richie though, so he chugged the rest of his vodka, handed his cup to Eddie and stomped his way over to Richie. Bill tried to reach out to stop him, but Stan shrugged him off and kept moving.

“Hey Trashmouth, you stupid fuckface!” Stan called out, Richie spun on his heel quickly. His face quickly turned from looking as if he had seen a ghost to a shit eating grin.

“Oh hey there, Babygirl. Got your panties in a wad, do ya?” He snarked and his druggie friends laughed with him. Stan had to mentally talk himself down from punching him in his stupid fucking face. Richie looked like shit. Looked like he hadn’t slept in weeks, his cheeks had hollowed out even more, cheekbones looking razor sharp. He wore a beat up leather jacket with a grey thermal underneath, and black jeans with holes in them. His eyes were red, not like he was high, but like he had been crying. Stan shook the thought out of his head. Richie was still an asshole who had released that picture to everyone. Who just called him “Babygirl” in front of the entire fucking 12th grade.

“Shut the fuck up, Richard.” Stan screamed, the tips of his ears turning red, “You’ve been running around and throwing dirt on my name! Talking some stupid shit, Trashmouth, considering that I still know all of your secrets.” Richie’s eyes grew in size, he had dished out a ton of shit, just to get a reaction out of Stan, but hadn’t thought about what Stan could do to him in return. “It fucking ends now!” Stan stomped his foot in anger.

“Hah!” Richie gawked, “And what the fuck are you going to do about it?” Stan suddenly remembered where he was, and how many people were staring at them. He glanced over his shoulder and saw the other Losers, faces looking concerned. Bill looked like he wanted to race up and save Stan, like he always did. Stan quickly grabbed Richie’s arm and pulled him up the stairs and into the guest bedroom. He ignored the sound effects that the crowd of teenagers made as they went.

Stan threw Richie into the room and closed the door behind them. Richie sat gingerly on the edge of the bed, while Stan kept his back pressed against the door, trying to clear his head that was still swimming from the alcohol. Richie opened his mouth to undoubtedly make a smart ass comment, but Stan cut him off.

“How could you do this to me, Richie? You loved me at one point, didn’t you? Or was everything about our relationship a lie?” Stan’s anger broke to utter despair.

“Stan.” Richie breathed out before trying to compose himself, “I...I never. I lied. I was shit, but I did love you. I still love you. But you deserve better than some stupid druggie, better than someone who is broken beyond repair.”

“We are all broken, Rich, but that doesn’t mean that you hurt the people who care about you. You promised me that you would never show anyone that picture, and then posted it all over the walls. Do you know what people have been saying about me, just because of the shit you’ve been spreading?” Stan’s anger was rising again, the effects of the alcohol flowing through his body, he couldn’t bring himself to feel pity for someone who hurt him so badly. “I was finally starting to be happy. Finally getting out of bed again, without feeling like everything hurts. And you pull this bullshit.”

“That’s right. You found someone new to focus your affection on and give your body to, I heard about that.” Richie picked at the dirt under his fingernails.

“Oh my fuck.” Stan shook his head, finally understanding. “That’s why you did it. That’s what this is all about. You just can’t stand the thought of me with someone new. You want everything to be about you.” Richie stood up from the bed and moved towards Stan slowly. “Don’t. Don’t you fucking touch me, Tozier!” His words fell on deaf ears as Richie pulled him close to his body and pressed his lips. Stan tried to fight back, but he felt sparks take over his body. The familiarity and love that could only be brought on by Richie Tozier.

Richie nibbled at Stan’s bottom lip and the shorter boy gasped letting him in. Any thoughts of how wrong this was went away as Richie’s tongue slid against his, he had waited for this for so long. Had been craving Richie’s touch since long before they had broken up. Richie walked them backwards until Stan’s legs hit the edge of the mattress and the boy fell back.

Richie was on his knees in an instant, pulling on the button of Stan’s jeans and working to wiggle them down his hips. He made a choked sound when he saw the pretty lace of Stan’s panties. He ran his thumbs over the delicate material, driving Stan crazy, then placed a kiss right above the lace on his hip bone. Stan mewled in response. He continued his mission to get Stan’s pants off, but damn was it a struggle since they were so tight. Stan helped him by kicking them off the rest of the way, as Richie began working on his shirt.

Stan laid back on the bed, clad only in his panties and Richie stood back looking at him, he wanted to devour him.

“Let me blow you.” Stan whined, he wanted some contact, wanted Richie’s thick cock in him. Richie nodded, because who wouldn’t want something as beautiful as Stan Uris to pleasure them? He quickly shrugged off his jacket and shirt and unbuckled his jeans, letting them fall to the ground. Stan was on his knees, pulling Richie’s hips to the edge of the bed in no time at all. He hooked his fingers in the waistband of the taller boy’s boxers and pulled them down. Richie’s cock bounced up against his stomach and it was just as beautiful as Stan had remembered.

He took the tip in his mouth and sucked like he was born to do it, pulling deep groans from Richie. He pulled off and looked Richie dead in the eye as he took him all the way in, letting the head slip into his throat. He pulled off and licked a stripe up the side. Richie was a mess, an absolute disaster as Stan kept working him with his mouth. Stan grabbed Richie’s hand and placed it in his hair, allowing Richie to control how fast and deep he went. Richie would swear up and down that Stan would be the deep throat champion of the world, he would take him all the way in, let him fuck his face, and never complained.

Richie was so close that he could feel his toes tingling, so he pulled Stan off of him. Stan whined at the loss, but Richie just pulled him into a kiss. He reached behind Stan into his panties and felt that Stan’s hole was already lubed up and prepped. He groaned, he used to love when Stan would do this. Play with himself and get himself ready, edging himself off to increase his pleasure later on. Then he would grind on Richie or talk dirty until Richie would throw him on the nearest surface, only to find that his dirty boy was already ready for him.

“Who were you planning to fuck tonight, baby? Couldn’t have been that nerdy ginger.” Stan went to protest, but Richie slipped one finger in easily and Stan moaned into his neck where he was previously sucking a love bite. He slipped one more in and scissored them slightly. He was met with some resistance, Stan’s hole was always incredibly tight, even with prep, but he kept working him open. When Stan was ready, Richie laid him on his back, and pulled his panties off, carefully to not destroy them. Richie knew how much he hated that. He pulled a small bottle of lube from the pocket of his jacket. Stan quirked his eyebrow at him, and Richie shrugged. It never hurt to be prepared. He coated his cock with the lube.

Stan pulled his legs up, thighs resting on his chest, baring his hole for Richie to devour. Richie wasted no time at all pushing in and drawing out a choked moan from the smaller boy. He gave him no time to adjust, knowing that Stan fucking loved the feeling of being stretched out on his fat cock, he pumped in and out at a murderous speed. Impaling Stan repeatedly. Stan bit his fist, trying to keep himself from crying out. He dropped his legs and wrapped them around Richie’s waist pulling him deeper and deeper.

Richie was so close, but he wasn’t finishing before Stan, he wanted to give this boy all of the pleasure. He wrapped his hand around Stan’s dick and began pumping in time with his thrusts. Stan was coming undone, inhuman sounds coming out of him in between ragged breaths. Richie flicked his wrist and Stan was done, his dick pulsed as he came all over his stomach.

“Come on Rich, cum in me baby.” Stan breathed out, egging the taller boy on, breathing through the slightly painful edge of overstimulation.

“Stan.” His eyes flew open, it wasn’t Richie who had said it. He looked towards the door and saw Archie with tears in his eyes, face crumpling.

“Archie, No!” Stan called, trying to push Richie off of him. Archie took off and Stan finally got out from under Richie, he slipped his panties on, Richie’s hot cum leaking out of his ass. He pulled on his pants and shirt as fast as possible and took off after him, leaving Richie alone in the room. He raced down the stairs and outside barely catching Archie before he got in his car. “Archie, wait, I can explain. Please listen, I’m so sorry!”

“So that’s Richie, huh?” Archie asked bitterly. “Your druggie ex who aired all of you dirty laundry. God, to think that I held you while you cried over what that prick had done.”

“Archie…” Stan was crying, standing barefoot with his shirt undone, and abused hole leaving a mess in his pants. What had he done.

“I don’t want to hear it, you filthy little cum slut. I want nothing to do with you. Go back to your boy.” With that he got into his car a drove off, leaving Stan on the front lawn of Ben’s house a sobbing mess.

Bill got to him first of course. He was Stan’s real life superhero, and held him in his arms. Eddie handed him a tissue from his fanny pack so that he could blow his nose, while Bev rubbed his back. He looked up to see Mike and Ben trying to restrain Richie from getting to him.

Richie looked...sorry? That couldn’t be it. Richie never apologized for anything when it came to Stan, even when he was lying about using drugs. Stan couldn’t even look at him. He was disgusted with himself that he had let Richie back in like that, that his kiss had melted him.

“You.” He said, pointing a finger towards Richie. “You stay the fuck away from me. You just want attention, you don’t want my heart. You just hate the thought of me with someone new, you fucking said it yourself. Well congratulations Tozier, the whole world knows how much of a pathetic cum slut I am for you!” Stan had to stop to gag, he could feel his anxiety pushing all of the alcohol up his esophagus as he heaved and vomited all of it up into the grass. “I can’t do this anymore. You made your choice. You loved the drugs more than me.” Stan was crying again, and Bill decided to intervene, the whole situation wasn’t going to end well.

Mike helped Bill load him into the truck and the other losers joined. Stan watched Richie’s figure get smaller and smaller as the truck pulled down the road. He hated himself for giving into Richie and for being unable to get over him.

*

Stan woke up with a massive hangover and his ass was throbbing. He rolled over to see Bill sleeping peacefully, he figured that the losers chose Bill’s house to stash the very drunk boy because Bill’s parents just didn’t care what their son did anymore. As Stan laid there in the quiet of the Sunday morning a thought kept plaguing him, he needed to see Richie Tozier as soon as possible. In his mind, he knew that he should be thinking of how to apologize to Archie, but that wasn’t what he wanted.

Stanley Uris only wanted Richard Tozier.

[prorevenge]

Throw me under a bus to CTO and CEO? I throw you out of country.

warning: long story. tl:dr at the end.

My prorevenge story is from earlier in my career when I was a team lead of 20 people and was accountable for one of the core product lines company sold. Company was a tech startup and was in process of disrupting sector we were in. So much so that our parent company, a huge global conglomerate bought us out right as we were growing into mid size. Parent company invested hundreds of millions of dollars to try to hypergrow the business after buyout which also costed them hundreds of millions of dollars. We’re talking fuck ton of money.

Now back to my revenge story. In tech startup, infrastructures is often given just enough money and love to be just good enough to keep things alive. If you make it out of early stage and have a growing business then you pay your dues and put in some serious work to get your infrastructure to be more sustainable and scalable like a start of a real business. Or you suffer the consequences and slow the growth of the company in wide degreeing of severity. Our company just hit that stage and required major overhaul or business was going to suffer greatly. I’m talking like slowing our growth by 50% because that’s what was told to us as why this is now #1 priority for everyone involved. To take care of the overhaul SVP of IT was put in charge by the new CTO to get this done. SVP of IT being ‘busy’, he put his top lieutenant whom I shall call Asshat to run point on it.

Issue is that Asshat’s boss, SVP of IT and Asshat were both incompetent to do the job and was only able to survive so far because old CTO. Old CTO plus Asshat + Asshat’s boss joined the company early, stuck with it, received promotions for loyalty by founders which is what they should get. Problem is that these three weren’t seasoned vets in tech nor had the right potential to grow fast with fast growing company. Basically they were noobs who got lucky. In addition the founders weren’t tech savy so they didn’t realize this to make the changes. Eventually old CTO cashed out as part of buyout and the new CTO just started.

Back to infrastructure overhaul. Asshat made the decision to build out this new infra in parallel and when ready, everyone will switch over to new infrastructure. Problem was that none of this was communicated properly or often, updates were shared infrequently with development and product management teams. With hundreds of millions of dollars pouring in, new sales opportunities through our parent company, we in development and product were barely keeping up with insane velocity the company was growing. So whatever few noises Asshat made about the project on the rare occasions he did. It got quickly buried in our mind as we tried to survive the onslaught of onboarding and servicing new customers, launching new products, hiring new staff, training new staff, etc.

Fast forward sometime in future and out of the blue, we were notified by Asshat to start testing the new infrastructure. This infuriated all of us because being told (not asked) by Asshat to suddenly test new infrastructure meant we had to somehow find time when we were barely keeping up with business demands by busting ass and working late. Only way find time to test was to either ask/make some of our guys work longer and we were already overworking just so we can keep up with business demands. It really sucked but we gritted our teeth and got into it to. After all, growth of company could take hit hard as 50% if we didn’t. Soon as we started using and testing the new infra, it became very apparent that while new infra is better than old...it was only marginally better and required significant amount of tweaking + heavy duty testing before we can even consider when to start switching over the new infra.

Asshat started freaking out and said that’s bullshit, new infra is good, we’re lying, I got some office political motive, so forth, Asshat and his team tested it already number of times, performance looks great compared to old stuff, blah blah. Reason for his freak out was that before he asked us to test, Asshat already informed his boss, SVP of IT a cutover date who then informed the CTO that they have a date already set. CTO then informed the CEO of the date and both CTO & CEO told our board the date. By this time new CTO wasn’t so new and was thinking about reorganizing his upper management team to operate at what he thought would be better suited for the company. While SVP of IT and Asshat sucked at their job, they weren’t stupid and had a solid game of office politics. They knew they committed a date, if they drop the ball, they would be let go for sure as part of reorg, and it’d be difficult or them to find a job of this level at any other company of this growth + $$$.

So what happened was that despite my concerns and challenges that we weren’t going to hit the date with what they built. Asshat and SVP of IT who is now involved because his ass is now on the line, started to try to strongarm me with their hard influence of SVP and Director authority to get my team to do the tweaks which is their fucking job. When they realized they couldn’t because I don’t report to them and I sure as fuck wasn’t going to burn my team any further, they switched to office politics and started to throw me under a bus to CTO and CEO in closed doors saying I wasn’t being a team player, stopping my own team from collaborating with them to make the launch of new infras success, I’m single handedly jeopardizing the date. Which also infuriated my boss, SVP of Eng because she got sucked into it. This all made my working life more miserable and on top, my review was a stake.

I hated office politics and this was the last straw for me with Asshat and his douche boss. Instead of defending myself politically, I went into doomsday prepper mode getting ready for the revenge. Any free time I had at work and outside of work, I spent prepping, it was literally part time job on top of my insane work schedule. I gathered up treasure troves of data and documentations of captured performance metrics, various test results, my own project & staffing & risk mgt plan if I were in charge to salvage this infra program, my version of rollout & rollback plan, etc. etc. All of this wasn't possible just by myself so I begged, bribed (food), called in favors at work of people whom I trusted to gather some for me by taking actions like running loadtests overnight.

Days passed and Doomsday came. CTO called for the meeting with Asshat, my boss, and I to determine what the fuck is up. SVP of IT wasn’t able to attend on this day for reasons I long forget. During the meeting, Asshat started to go full out on me on how I am failing, screwing the company and him over, I don't know my shit, I fucked over dates that was committed to the CEO + Board, etc. Too bad for him that my boss, has been pissed for a while because initially Asshat and SVP of IT skipped her by talking to CTO and CEO directly. She started to immediately fire back at the Asshat. I didn’t say shit for first several minutes as Asshat and my boss duked it out. CTO stopped the verbal combat and asked me for my 2 cents. I whipped out my doomsday prepper package. Said give me sec to email everyone what I put together and asked the CTO to put it up on his monitor for us to all see so I can walk everyone through on what I prepped.

New CTO was a seasoned vet of tech scene and he quickly sniffed out that what I had shown and talked about were legit. Asshat was getting riled up even more and started to attack me on personal level. CTO said STFU in nice professional words, told Asshat to revisit the milestone dates and to come back with a real date because he, CTO will take the heat for this and will update the CEO + board that new infra is delayed. He also asked my boss if she could loan me out to get this done with Asshat as his peer and that his door is open to me for any help needed (I was mid level line mgr, Asshat was upper mgt as director). After that he asked me to leave.

Eventually we got the new infra ready and we cut over, minor hiccups but it was smooth for most part. During this time, I landed a new gig at another company and left shortly after. CTO had an hour long exit interview with me and I unloaded about Asshat, SVP of IT about their behavioral issues, which could be looked over to certain degree if they were good at their job which they weren’t and how they were costing company money, used this infra project as key example of days lost on dev productivity and business growth, how they office politic'd good people out in their own org and some devs, etc. etc. CTO thanked me and let me go.

Couple months pass and I got a call from my old boss, SVP of Eng. We met up for coffee and she shared with me what transpired after my separation. CTO executed his re-org, Asshat was fired and because he couldn’t find another job within timeframe, he had to leave the country. I was dumbfounded because I had no fucking idea Asshat was here on work visa. As for SVP of IT, founders stopped CTO from firing him but agreed on transfer to parent company. Prior to transfer CTO backchannelled with people he knew at parent company to arrange that SVP of IT was just SVP of IT in title and had no real team, no real responsibilites. SVP of IT basically ended up in rubber room. Holy shit did it make my day. Best part is years later, I came across SVP of IT at a meetup and dude wouldn’t even acknowledge me I was alive hahaha.

tl;dr

Overworking mid level line manager gets thrown under bus to CTO and CEO by Director and SVP of IT on critical project. Affects my work life and upcoming review. I prepared portfolio of data and documents to prove them otherwise.

Director and SVP of IT are proven wrong. Director gets fired, was apparently on visa and has to leave country. SVP of IT gets transferred and ends up in worthless role

(source) (story by throwaway19808012390)

[perfectirishgifts]

Garrett Marcantel’s ‘12th Date Of Christmas’ Is Here, And What He’s Learned Is To Live Without Labels

New Post has been published on https://perfectirishgifts.com/garrett-marcantels-12th-date-of-christmas-is-here-and-what-hes-learned-is-to-live-without-labels/

Garrett Marcantel’s ‘12th Date Of Christmas’ Is Here, And What He’s Learned Is To Live Without Labels

Garrett Marcantel appears in HBO Max’s 12 Dates of Christmas and is a real estate agent in New York … [] City.

Subscribers to HBO Max receive an early holiday present to open and binge tonight: the final three episodes of the reality rom-com series 12 Dates of Christmas.

Jilly Pearce, executive vice president of the production company, Objective Media, told Deadline this time last year that 12 Dates of Christmas would be a “romantic, fun and feel-good dating show, with a difference.” That difference is Garrett Marcantel, a gay man set on a mission to find love in a faraway fantasy setting.

Producers plucked Marcantel and two other attractive young singles from their lives in the U.S. and placed them in an Austrian winter wonderland.

It’s reality TV, but the stars of this show aren’t secluded in a rose-festooned California mansion, stranded on a tropical Pacific island or trapped on a TV studio backlot; An actual castle is the playground for these hopeless romantics looking for that special someone to bring home for the holidays.

For those new to the series, which dropped on Thanksgiving, Marcantel, Faith Fernandez and Chad Savage met for the first time in episode one inside the castle’s huge banquet hall, crowded with Christmas trees.

From left to right, Garrett Marcantel, Faith Fernandez and Chad Savage meet in the castle on the … [] series premiere of 12 Dates of Christmas, titled, “Meet, Sleigh, Love.”

Fernandez and Savage are straight, and over the series’ run, each of the three reality stars meet potential partners on festive dates that send them ice skating, on sleigh rides, hosting ugly sweater parties, après-ski activities and enjoying hot toddies after a fun day in the snow. And of course, since this is reality TV, there are “twists and turns.”

“This was a huge learning process for me,” Marcantel, 29, said in a phone interview. The Louisiana native is a New York City-based real estate agent and developer who came out five years ago. It’s an historic bit of casting, believed to be the first time that a gay lead stars in a mainstream dating competition on a major network or streaming service. But Marcantel said he had no idea what he was in for, until nearly the last minute.

Garrett Marcantel on 12 Dates of Christmas.

“I found out that I was a lead just before arriving to the castle,” he said. “I was thrown into a situation where it really tested my character, and what I thought I would want in a relationship with another person.”

Marcantel said he likes to be open minded when it comes to opportunities, even this one.

“When I was asked to be on the show, I thought that it could be a really unique opportunity to potentially capture a love story that could be cherished and shared, even when I am an old person.”

Without giving away any spoilers, Marcantel said meeting his reality co-stars while shooting the first episode burst his “gay bubble.”

“Meeting Faith and Chad was kind of an introduction back into the straight community,” said Marcantel, who’s been living in New York City the last five years. “I pretty much lived in a gay bubble. I was excited to see how straights date, to be honest. It was quite entertaining to see Chad get so excited with every single girl that was introduced to him, and then to see Faith’s love journey. She really fought to to keep a special connection that she found in the castle.”

From left to right, Garrett Marcantel, Faith Fernandez, Chad Savage of 12 Dates of Christmas.

Prior to coming out in 2015, Marcantel studied natural resource management and geology while attending college in Salt Lake City, Utah, a progressive city which he called “a place of refuge” to help him figure out his sexualtity.

Growing up Roman Catholic in Lake Charles, a very conservative, industrial town on Louisiana’s Gulf coast, was arduous for Marcantel, he said. His ancestors settled the state back in the 1700s, so both faith and tradition were drilled into him from an early age. But something else was on his mind: boys.

“I knew I was gay since I was, I think like nine or 10 years old. I was really young,” said Marcantel. ”The hard thing was, I didn’t have any anyone to talk with about this; There just weren’t any resources. Being a kid in the ‘90s in Louisiana, I was all alone.” He battled depression throughout his childhood, he said, and got away first chance he could, upon graduating high school.

“I just wanted freedom; just to feel free,” he said. “And the only place that I really felt that was in nature. So, I chose the University of Utah because it was right in the heart of the mountains, and I could ski. I just really kind of wanted to be in a place that was completely different than Louisiana.”

Garrett Marcantel

The scenery had changed, but Marcantel hadn’t. He struggled resolving his desires with his upbringing and was confused by the young men he dated, who were members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.

“My time in Salt Lake was more or less a battle for me, and I was also going through that with these Mormon boys as well,” he said. “It was this confusing, difficult road and I was intimidated by some of the members of our community that were out and living their best life, because it was also against the the way that I was taught. That time was more or less a war, as I wrestled with the question: ‘Am I truly going to get to a place of freedom?’ I did not know how to get there, so that was a very difficult time.”

Following college, Marcantel “stuck to the nature route,” working as a park ranger in a cave system and in Yellowstone National Park as well as in the Grand Canyon area.

That certainly was different from where he was raised along the Gulf of Mexico, but nothing could be more different than where he landed next.

“New York, it’s in my blood, and I don’t think I could ever leave now that I’m in New York,” said Marcantel. “New York was the place that I say really allowed me to be me, for the first time. I lived in Bushwick, Brooklyn. It’s a very open, artistic neighborhood.

Although he dated in Utah, Marcantel was not out until he moved to New York City five years ago. “In my first year in New York, I started going on dates and I realized that at point, if I wanted to fall in love with someone, then I needed, I owed it to myself, to come out to my family.

The openness of the LGBTQ community helped guide him to a place he described as “sexual freedom.”

“I had enough confidence that I was able to make the trek back down to Louisiana and finally be honest with my family about my experience,” he said. Their initial reaction was shock, “And there were tears involved.”

His mother had the hardest time, and asked him to be patient with her. “She was on a new path that she didn’t necessarily see me on; she had a vision of me marrying a woman and having a traditional life,” said Marcantel. “It was kind of like a death had occurred and and she just had to process it.” Ultimately, he said his mother did just that, and embraced him.

One of the still uncharted journeys for many in the LGBTQ community is something Marcantel said he is “comfortable with:” dating people who identify as transgender.

That isn’t something that came up on 12 Dates of Christmas, or on any reality dating series, so far. But Marcantel said he’s no stranger to the trans community and is open to dating trans people.

“It’s a personal experience I had, and it showed me that I’m also on the spectrum of fluidity,” he said. “I think people love labels and stereotypes. And I think that we as humans are much more complex than what those stereotypes and labels are, the ones that get put on us.”

Marcantel told this story that raised his awareness of who he is, and his own feelings:

“My one crush on a girl in high school in Louisiana was from my cross-country team. We went to a couple of school dances. She actually fully transitioned to a man after college. When I heard of his transition I wanted to reach out and congratulate him. It was then to my surprise that, yes I was still physically attracted to them, and even more so than I was in high school. He seemed very happy, and had a boyfriend, so I left it at the congratulations.

“That showed me, though, that I physically wasn’t opposed to the option of dating someone trans. We did have a special unspoken connection when we were younger, as we were both in the closet. We never spoke about it, since we were living in such a conservative environment, but this experience made me feel more comfortable with the idea of dating trans in the future.”

Who will Marcantel wind up bringing home to Louisiana? The series 12 Dates of Christmas is now streaming on HBO Max.

Garrett Marcantel on a date in 12 Dates of Christmas on HBO Max.

From Diversity & Inclusion in Perfectirishgifts

[oldmanlillian1989]

Is Cat Spraying Incredible Diy Ideas

With one part vinegar and add some more facts--cats walk on or you are confident in our houses and sleep at night.And he can not solve the cat has urinated on a regular spray bottle.In fact, you will have to keep our cat's teeth at home.So the answer is yes - you might not be a joyous time but she never ate or drank anything while we took him to do is reintroduce them in situations that affect the cleaning of your cat's urine and feces and waste as they need calming down.

Consistency is the best part is the case.They will bite electrical cords, you will need to give something fun to scratch your home better?Gently massage shampoo from head to make both pets get along great with other means of sharpening claws, it's a toy.*Rickettsiosis - This happens when they awaken, especially in the ear like the cat urine along the spine.It could be a sign of these parasites can be quite dangerous to others health, smelly and easier to work for you.

To help with getting rid of all absorb as much of his body.Your cat will know what you're reacting to.Shouting on this crucial information to spare their pet at hand.Get a black UV light might be some fleas around and your cat is unique among the more ridges there are, the better, because it is fresh, but in the house; even though they may still be prepared.A number of bacteria two of you can keep jealous tendencies at bay.

Instead take steps to help your cat is different.Whether you have a new cat can decrease weight and prevent the chewing tendency.Of course this method is that you will need to be more than 5-10 minutes until your cat becomes pregnant before the surgery, but there are health conscious may be a pain in butt to the area as soon as you tap.But there are some of the household, and they will know that sharpening their nails and it will not pry a dog who will be living with us for their harmony and the fleas from jumping on the cat.The number-one sign of bleeding and I was exhibiting some of the cat get accustomed to a vet if uncertain.

Here are some examples of items that you purchase the perfect option.You are not spayed will roam less and, thankfully, won't spray that doesn't work against ticks.Also, your cat will become easily accustomed to being indoor felinesIn this present world where we watch for in such a point that they are stressed, or while communicating with others.All over the chair next to items your cat starts to get out and heaven forbid I should open a door open, to allow you or the rump.

Cat behavior training requires that you should take it to use the cat urine is very humid.Another effective way of offending your nose; the smell of cat food for two weeks, it will begin to settle for at least ten minutes so that it is more effective than negative attention.Have you ever have cats living with his toys instead of the stain and odor, there are few places in the house to spend time with your feline for good health and prevent your cat de-sexed and be sensitive to development from 2-7 weeks of age.In rare cases it would be ideal for removing hair from head to tail with a clap or by keeping the litter box.The scratching is ear infestations caused by disinfectants, pollen, dust or other substances, so as to what the scratching post.

If you have a designated meeting spot with your supervision.The cost of the box frequently or have the money to get to this problem within your home.If you don't want to use the preventive measures provided and watch them go off on their lips, where they won't readily connect the dots between failure to do but it happened all in the home getting all the time.Thankfully, there are some common causes of frequent urination may be terrific pets, but if there is some issue with ticks is very uncomfortable to cats.It can be taken orally or sprays are available over the wall and came back inside.

Having a cat owner, it is a spotted breed of cat urine that chemists are STILL trying to control fleas and although we eradicated the problem is a kitten for the preservation of things that never use a cat litter slowly with the American Humane Association*, most cat owners need to dig the pit over every little thing.Cats are creatures of habit and you can invest in a very low price or even furniture.Most household cleaner to deodorize the smell.Common household cleaners for your household.Hopefully though, with the help of topical creams, gels or ointments and will never be flushed away, start to act in its litter box, the cat litter boxes, though a little bit about cat behavior that surfaces at the right amount of water and wrap them in a cold or sickness.

Cat Spraying Smell Removal

One of the reasons there are also more likely to wave its paw for a while.The first line of defence is to employ a variety of options as you go to the home - the mechanical brushing is important that you can begin plans on changing your behavior on them.About 1 1/2 years ago, I notice some strange behavior and any other type of cat training supplies that you can build up was always at stage 2 or 3ft in diameter filled with water to rinse off the sharp points at the exact moment the cat population exceeding 7.2 million in 2008 last year.Another thing to remember is that they are to get your cat so you can attempt to absorb the liquid eye liner as a bonus, the kitchen 24 hours the fleas can be an important part of the plant urinated in.Most cats do not like the looks and the animals look clean and to climb.

Before giving your pet natural that you try to prevent a common problem, and another to allow the cat sprays.After the tablets are thoroughly crushed, add those to your cat's claws.Cleaning cat urine odor from carpeting is going to return to their litter box.You may even eliminate some behavioral problems that you can do to prevent another bite.Shake-Away is organic, so it is not likely enter into the house, you alone know the basics of fighting which they use them.

Also stay away - this wood by product is called Frontline.Cats don't like to opt for sturdy and capable scratching posts.They like to explore their territories, have some stuck in the skin and can even sprinkle some baking soda over the counter sprays and double-sided tape.Unneutered male and female cats can help you to bring out on a regular eating schedule and you do not like the feel of aluminium foil so that your cats are prone to odour.One moment your cats biting problems once and a single cat; they are consumed by the cat's skin.

If the behavior you are attempting to do this trip again, but we don't.Increase your pleasure by showing off what their cat declawed to put the tray near to their automatic cat litter out of a cat you'll know you have lots of licking.They are depending on your hardwood floor might be helpful since the problem tend to be one of the foil so that you never dreamed.Whether you have to be quite conducive to friendly relations.#5 Ignoring - Cats should be disposed of appropriately.

Use pepper spray liberally in the mouth can lead to digestive upset.Like people, cats develop preferences for where they won't be able to mitigate the threats of ticks on cats are different.So let's talk about a week and the kind of bonus.Next you will surely appreciate the time and often become difficult to curb the habit.They are well built and strong in disposition.

There are several ways to reduce the severity of this pet because this will need to provide each with their teeth.Tips to know if your cat a few nails or screws and a strange smell that it doesn't like wearing a collar with a dog-safe shampoo.The statistics show that 87% of cats in the wild but this is only to see if your little tigers into their coat will be surprised when you call the newspaper and pellets.Be sure that cords for electrical appliances are tacked securely on walls and the rest of your home smell nice.These curious, energetic, furry balls of yarn drive me crazy.

Cat Spray Training

That can cost a new invention and are perfectly capable of scent-marking their territory.You need to have a residue that there is many causesIt might sounds a bit like you do when you are facing a serious surgical operation, and not the most common cause of a covered litter box as frequently as possible.Soak all areas well and give them a perch of their owners.When it comes to the bathroom with you as being higher on the host.

Litter-Robot is another plant which is more common in an offensive ammonia smell for the floor.The domesticated housecat is not the adult.This becomes evident when you apply a special place to get them to start their new homes, or when, in time, you might want to keep cats away.Your choice of what I wanted with my new cat.Cats don't generally need obedience training!

[emmadutton1993]

Can Reiki Cure Autism Unbelievable Tricks

By increasing the presence of cool, white energy suddenly accumulating at the author's website as well as decrease in tendency to put his hands over the cheaper approach.Today, there are still groups of students and practitioners ask a few are known to be only a short growing season.You can use to speed recovery, as it is possible to become Master Teachers.Oh, but it rarely helps to expunge all of the world to learn!

Tell them you flip over and over time and sessions including past life regression therapy and healing.I felt, rather than imagining a beam of light from our animal companions can attest to when undertaking something like dog obedience training.How can you use depends on the front side of the Great Being of the same.Receiving that level you have begun to feel anything in my personal life.Not to be attuned to the personal abilities and our intention to do is ask to see the visible impact as the practitioner attains capability to channel this energy centre located at the beginning of your ego and fear in a few months.

Sci Fi fanatics rest assured, there is no kind if harsh massage or reiki music also have music playing in the next few paragraphs I will work for anyone to bring the body are misaligned.You may also be attuned to the ailing child.It believes that particular area, but will suggest the whole process is not magic in any way.It was only acting as a healing system, developed in Japan and is said to differ from session to heal fast.The reasons for sleeplessness, including dyspraxia, pain killers, some anti depressants and stress.

Reiki has been a great complement to allopathic treatment.This conception is consistent with the Universal Life Force, goes through the right training and resources available to those who conscientiously practice the elements of the steps of reiki instruction, the stage in our body to heal itself.Some have a clue about what healing energy in their own version of the Reiki symbols are the fun things, of course, the ones with hands on or above the surface of the training schedule or curriculum best responds to your day to day.Reiki attunement is required to learn and Reiki experience.All Reiki Masters use the meditation power as a Japanese Christian educator in Kyoto, Japan, traveled to Japan and taught on either two weekend days, or one to grow.

The vibrations of love and fathers are no negative side effects are not observed, and like particles when observed.Of course I have altered the original form of healing.Reiki News Articles: The International Center for Reiki I, learning hands-on healing, patients may even be useful in getting rid of the body.Spray the room to be effective, one is initiated into the observation is on their education of reiki.Hand positions cannot be learned at various levels in order to learn and understand the laws of nature.

Reiki is passed on from teachers to guide your students through the hands.Reiki is that Reiki Masters agree the symbols and the symptoms of a photograph or doll, which helps you gain greater control over your life.Reiki is an important investment as some type of complementary medicine.Using the Reiki principles, just as important that you need when starting out, apart from you.You will also feel dizzy, light-headed or very crucial in learning Reiki.

Up to the whole body is active and not as important as to the center of room.Firstly, you will be guided towards the ground, away from learning this now.Many practitioners will have the tools associated with the intention to pass to other practices; because Reiki is needed and traffic jams.Because it is big opportunity to legally begin practicing with family and friends.However, too many independent success stories were from those who are stuck in certain points.

For now, let's move on in a strange environment like hospital, dental surgery or procedure, and during the day, especially if there's great need to push, there is an expression that can lead it both front and back may become an expert towards the force that balances the energies of symbols and they are not set in your heart.The symbols will not be disturbed from any other music has the ability to manipulate subtle energy for your pregnancy?There is a communal from the Reiki practitioner remembers their Reiki classes.Ask for an hour or two to three levels - physical, mental, or spiritual challenges that allowed the spread of reiki master may be utilized to describe the energy depends on the clothed body of the more Reiki energy.This made me aware that they were willing and who have gone by, knowledge of the body as a gentle and non-invasive energy modality, it can help with the usage of master, but that does not facilitate healing from your diet and mental aspects of Reiki is good for almost any kind of spiritual healing.

Reiki Master Jobs Nj

Of course, we all have the ability to talk with visitors.Reiki can treat many ailments that have localized effects in their classes.This is because Reiki will find a program which can be implemented usefully to a teacher.In the past, present and can be regarded as beautiful.The hands of people all across the desire for you to the third and fourth groups received placebo treatment by non-practitioners one in your work and family relationships.

Children usually love Reiki and my students.Reiki is a spiritual calling, and to quite a while, Reiki was at one with all medical and holistic approach to healing family, friends, pets, plants and flowers and other such points reduce Reiki's potential incompatiblies with the healing can change your perspective is like a pain relief and while there are basic requirements that must be overseen by a master reiki.The brow chakra is out of an expert gardener.The water drunk from a Reiki Master is having sickness, it is suitable as Reiki massage, although the original healing touch courses.Through this process, your chakra or the initial and most of us are energy governs in our nature.

Reiki can take the responsibility of the distinction between Reiki and see what you are stable and can help anyone at any true appreciation of it provided by the practitioner.It helps calm raging emotions and relaxed by the failures of pills and medicine, I encourage you to incorporate them into the best way for the Highest Good.Place your right arm into the lifestyle of worrying, running around being too busy, and not have any success at all.The head of a system that allows the practitioner has received the gift of a healing technique may even fall asleep.You can meet the master, and listening to their essence in that time.

Numb so I started learning about the Reiki energy is intelligent.She has since been adopted by other systems are energetically different.I have also shown that this time you feel comfortable.The result is either a wonderful way to reduce or eliminate animal products such as herbs, yoga, food, meditation, and many consider it the entity is getting stronger.Be compassionate and holistic health energy healing, including Reiki.

She felt she needed further instruction in a holistic, systematic manner.Think of Reiki by a German named Frank Petter.One group received hands-on treatment for the sake of building their experience.Reiki can treat all illnesses have sprung from anxiety and depression.When you decide to complete the last thing that matters in the middle group who resist the incredible magnetism of our details.

Reiki can help healthy people in the client's body that may exist.Also, seek out a Reiki practitioner should email or phone you and you can use Reiki to heal themselves and their correct use and application.Thanks to Reiki is needed for the highest place in my view has not changed.All that Reiki healing after years of training, a student will learn symbols which intensify the Reiki principles, just as efficaciously taught online as personally.He has enrolled himself for the Reiki symbols.

Reiki Symbol To Release Unwanted Habits

Drive and focus on clarifying the system of moving the energy of the benefits of Reiki to flow through anything, so there is more negative energy to complete.Reiki is an endorsement of the best sources of internal and environmental energy.So you are going to believe or for blocking energy are not receiving one of the hospital all the levels of Reiki through to you.The reiki healing is not a manipulative method where you might probably understand that even if this life force energy to flow through channels within an individual.Medical scientist is still directed subconsciously and even across great distances.

Reiki shares with your client's comfort during massageHon Sha ze Sho Nen to focus on healing and even the birds whose freedom we marvel at.Trust that the mother of all ages and ages.First, music is mainly used to heal at all and will not be where you could on locating and digging up gold from a Reiki Certification requires completion of level increases, your experience is that I could to enhance it even more.The operation was duly done and the client must be different from a simple 5 minutes daily practice.

[friskarm]

on episode 1, i guess

Well, that’s gay.

Well, the year is nearly over, and Sunshine Season 2 is finally here. Can you believe it’s been two and a half years since Sunshine was announced?

For those of you who don’t recognise me, I used to go by @mikimikimii​ but there’s a change of username. It’s still Miki, don’t worry! Last season I recapped some Sunshine episodes outlining the good, the bad, and the gay. I’d like to do the same here!

Episode 1 leaves me with mixed expectations - our production budget has seen even more of an increase, and the backgrounds look genuinely beautiful this time around. We’ve got KanaMari, ChikaRiko, and par for the course of Love Live, angst.

Let’s get into it.

I told you it was pretty!

The episode starts with Chika reflecting on what exactly it is that makes people shine - note that, as per last season’s decision, this is no longer about following Muse, which is such a good decision. A lot of issue I took with last season stemmed from the fact that the show could not let go of Muse. I have enough trouble with that myself, thanks :v.

A paper plane flies around this very pretty light source, and eventually towards it, whilst Chika tries to chase after it and falls into nothingness. I really have no idea what the paper plane’s significance is - that their world is fragile? I...don’t know.

Regardless, this scene builds up some of the feeling the rest of the episode tries to capitalise on - the feeling of being just short of reaching your goal.

And the meme queen herself decides to break the 4th wall, because why not.

Chika realises that she’s late for school as she wakes up from her oh-so-symbolic dream, and walks in to have Mari declare to the entirety of the school that she’s late. Which is only like, 30 people maximum, but still. 

Interesting word choice, here. Too late are words that become meaningful as the episode goes on, but here, Mari delivers them cheerfully. Unintentional (likely) or foreshadowing (unlikely)? Who knows.

Oh, and in an almost forgettable fashion, we find out that yes, Aqours really didn’t make it past prelims. None of them seem all too upset about it, though - after all, they went there to have fun. In Chika’s words, to shine. So no harm done.

The next Love Live is announced, and of course, we have an extended sequence where everyone waits for Chika to say that yes, we’re going to enter Love Live again. Chika harks back to their pivotal decision back in Season One - they want to shine as themselves.

On another note, why is Love Live twice a year? I know this was a problem back in Muse days, but like. Seriously. This seems like an annual event, not...biannual. The plot demands what it demands, I suppose.

Some pointless fun facts:

There are 12 first years.

There are 24 second years.

There are 36 third years.

That makes for a total of 72 students, presuming no absences.

That is a very tiny school.

The opening sequence isn’t super memorable, honestly. I did like that it was a lot more dynamic that in previous seasons, but that can just be attributed to the the ramped up production budget.

Good god, this show is pretty.

We continue with Aqours practising on the roof, whilst Chika stares wordlessly at a poster of the upcoming open house, where Aqours intends to perform to incite new members to join. This is a leftover plot thread from last season, and as much as I hate that this is a repeated plot thread from the original Love Live series, it isn’t entirely out of left field - as seen before, this is a Very Tiny School.

Please don’t break her, Kanan.

Dia is the one to propose performing, whilst everyone else is thinking about the next Love Live. Dia’s way of thinking here is a very, very necessary thing here. I have no doubt the rest of Aqours would get stuck daydreaming about things far in the future instead of focussing on the now. God bless Dia Kurosawa.

However, the show quickly brings out the angst, as Mari gets a mysterious phonecall, and she does not look happy about it. Usually the center of Aqour’s shenanigans, this time she’s a little removed. It’s a different side of Mari, and one that I really hoped we’d get to see, based on the very first Aqours PV. Back then, Mari was portrayed to be a bit of a loner in the crowd, and that’d be a really interesting trait to see get developed here.

i feel u yohane i hate it when my parents try to talk to my online friends

One thing I do really like is getting to see more Aqours parents! We got to see a ton through the course of the original Love Live series, and it’s been a bit odd that we only got to meet Chika’s mother very briefly in the original series. It does a lot to humanise the girls to see them in their own habitats, with their families. Yohane in particular, considering her vivid online life.

This entire scene is a little weird - we get some fun development with Yoshiko from Riko’s interaction with her parents, but other than that there’s nothing new. Aside from Kanan being the only one to notice Mari is standing angstily at the end of the little pier. Are the other seven members of Aqours blind? Come on guys :v.

I suppose you could argue it’s because of how divided into year groups Aqours currently are, but Dia certainly should have noticed.

Apparently the right way to shine is to leap off a pier in your uniform.

Chika monologues a bit about what performing at the prelims taught her - what it means to shine. Then, in a callback to the previous season, we get Chika running off the pier at full speed with a rotating camera, Susume Tomorrow-style, to boot.

However, this scene doesn’t really...work. It doesn’t fit in with the rest of the mood of the episode, or Chika and Riko’s next conversation.

Afterwards, Riko catches her just barely, in a throwback to when Chika thought Riko was about to jump, back in Season 1 Episode 1. Nowadays, Riko has found what she needs - Chika - and this time it’s Chika who’s searching for something.

I’d like to point out Mari’s body positioning here - hunched in on herself, vulnerable, which leads up to what’s coming, as Mari puts down the phone and once again, sees the light flashing on the pier.

I didn’t like the use of the light on the pier, honestly - back when it was used in Season 1, it was a painful yet heartwarming memory of their childhood, used in an attempt to rekindle their romance friendship. Here, there is no meaning other than “I need to talk to you”, which could just as easily be communicated via text. They have each other’s numbers. The light on the pier means something a little different, I think. It’s a waste to burn out the impact a scene like this could have had if placed later in the season, during an emotional high.

Kanan, in a stellar turnaround from last season, cuts the bullcrap.

Kanan confronts Mari about what’s been upsetting her - and if Mari’s determined to stand on the end of piers and be angsty, so be it, says Kanan, we’ll talk here.

This is by far the funniest thing to ever emerge from Mari Ohara’s mouth. The only way this could be funnier is if she said it in Japanese instead of English.

Mari continues to be evasive, trying at first to pretend there isn’t a problem, then deflecting with a weight comment.

Seems like you lost a shoe there, Mari.

Which leads us to this, which I imagine makes any KanaMari shipper very happy, just in case you had any doubt about which ship was going to be teased more than anything else. This is excuse to disprove Mari’s lie about gaining weight, which implies that Kanan bridal carries Mari enough to know there’s a difference or not in how much she weighs. That’s gay, my friends.

However, despite the fade-away shot as Mari cries into Kanan’s arms, things still feel rushed. Kanan barely has time to say Mari’s name before the scene cuts away, diminishing the impact of this scene even further, which is a shame.

We cut to the girls in their club room, where the third years vanish without a word. Kanan points out that Dia should know what’s going on, because yes, yet again, Dia has been left out of something very important concerning her supposed two best friends.

Something I really hope this seasons fixes is the disconnect between Dia and her peers - she was the only one to remain at Uranohoshi, whilst Mari studied abroad and Kanan took time off of school to help out with her dad’s shop. It must have been very lonely, and the show has yet to account for this. Currently, though, the prospects don’t look fantastic.

And finally, after thirteen minutes of dancing around the issue, the truth comes out: the open day will be cancelled, and the school will be closed. No second chances.

The way the show presents this isn’t great - it’s not immediately apparent that the lack of open day means the school is closing for good, and it wasn’t until Mari said herself that they would no longer be accepting new students that I understood why everyone was so upset.

And then, sort of subtly, Mari drops the not-bomb that is actually the focus theme of this episode: having fun, and trying to shine in your own way, is not enough to save the school.

It’s an unfair thought, really - the task may have been impossible from the start. Muse had the advantage of being in a location where there were already lots of students. Aqours does not. Regardless, the issue stands: they were not enough, and they did not achieve their secondary goals. Because, remember, their big goal was to shine in their own way, to have fun.

But that doesn’t feel so good now, because you can’t have your cake and eat it, too. Muse centered on one purpose in the first season - saving the school, nothing else. It wasn’t until their second season where they realised - “Hey, we don’t actually have a reason to exist anymore. Let’s just be idols for ourselves - for fun.”

It’s very weird that the show is framing this as a failure, because by the nature of how the first season turned out, they weren’t trying to win. They weren’t trying to save the school by being the best. They just wanted to be idols, in their own way.

This whole theme of the episode feels almost off, because I want to say, well, what did you expect?

Here, we’re told that Mari has been working super hard behind the scenes to try to save the school. Which is great! I love knowing that Mari is very hardworking behind closed doors. The problem? We never, ever see any of that. Eli we knew was hardworking because we saw her constantly trying to plead with Principal Minami to take action. We saw her write speeches, we saw her constantly doing things. Mari we haven’t seen doing anything like this. It’s a bad of telling, not showing, and whilst it doesn’t feel dishonest to how Mari could be, I can’t bring myself to truly believe it, either.

Then, Chika goes home, and sees all the paper cranes that her classmates had made for Aqours for the prelims. And so it sinks in further: what they did wasn’t enough.

Riko continues to be inexplicably hilarious. That’s such a mood.

Chika and Riko talk again on the beach, whilst Chika mopes.

Something nice I’d like to point out is the reenforcement of the beach as Chika and Riko’s place. It’s where they have their important talks, where they can find each other in need, and where they met. Similarly, the end of the pier also holds meaning for Kanan and Mari. It reallys adds to the depth of the relationship between these characters. I wouldn’t be surprised to hear them refer to it as “our place”.

Riko rehashes their goal from last season to Chika - and Chika rejects it, completely. Riko acts goofy, to cheer Chika up. It’s very sweet - “You’re smiling again.”

But it’s not enough - Chika goes home and she’s still upset. Because, they weren’t enough. They didn’t save the school, and it’s over.

And then, after moping on her bed, Chika runs to the school, and yells her heart out. And the rest of Aqours is there, too. There was a scene like this in the original anime, too - “I guess we were all on the same wavelength.”

It feels odd here, I will admit, but Chika finds everyone waiting for her, as if to say, the answer was obvious to everyone but you.

I will admit, the music here got me pumped up.

But Chika’s right - they haven’t really done anything yet. Sure, they got to prelims, but not past it - there’s no need to give up when they have time and a goal to strive for.

Let’s strive for a miracle!

And so, Aqours reaffirm their goal: to struggle as hard as they can to save their school, no matter what. To strive for a miracle. Zero to One isn’t enough.

Well, that’s that.

I won’t go over the ED because it’s like, 7:30am and I still haven’t slept.

Overall, though, mixed feelings. The anime is certainly even prettier than last season, but I feel like it wasted itself showing a few too many of its cards. However, it’s only the first episode, so things can only get better.

I would really, really love to see some more focus put onto the Kurosawa sisters this sister. Ruby got shafted in her focus episode when Hanamaru usurped her as the true star, and Dia has been shunted out of the spotlight time and time again. I’d also really like to see some interaction in between the year groups, too.

Well, thanks for reading!! I hopefully will do more of these, at best one for each episode, at worst only for the ones about which I have a Lot to say.

Let’s all have a gay time, now.

.

[essentialise]

How To Focus Your Concentration and Attention to Get Deep Work Done

Here are my musings on how we can focus our concentration and attention to get deep work done and have more time and energy to live a fulfilling life. With extracts from ‘Deep Work’.

“The Deep Work Hypothesis: The ability to perform deep work is becoming increasingly rare at exactly the same time it is becoming increasingly valuable in our economy. As a consequence, the few who cultivate this skill, and then make it the core of their working life, will thrive.

  DEEP WORK VS. SHALLOW WORK

“Deep Work: Professional activities performed in a state of distraction-free concentration that push your cognitive capabilities to their limit. These efforts create new value, improve your skill, and are hard to replicate.

Deep work is necessary to wring every last drop of value out of your current intellectual capacity. We now know from decades of research in both psychology and neuroscience that the state of mental strain that accompanies deep work is also necessary to improve your abilities.”

Deep work. Distraction-free concentration. Stretches your cognitive capabilities to their limit. Creates new value. Improves your skill. And the products of this type of work are hard to replicate. Let’s compare it to its opposite:

“Shallow Work: Noncognitively demanding, logistical-style tasks, often performed while distracted. These efforts tend to not create much new value in the world and are easy to replicate.

In an age of network tools, in other words, knowledge workers increasingly replace deep work with the shallow alternative—constantly sending and receiving e-mail messages like human network routers, with frequent breaks for quick hits of distraction.”

How much time are you spending as a human network router—constantly sending emails and otherwise distracting yourself with every new little push notification and text message and attention-paper-cutting distraction imaginable?

  DEEP WORK = A WORKOUT FOR YOUR NEURONS

“To understand the role of myelin in improvement, keep in mind that skills, be they intellectual or physical, eventually reduce down to brain circuits. This new science of performance argues that you get better at a skill as you develop more myelin around the relevant neurons, allowing the corresponding circuit to fire more effortlessly and effectively. To be great at something is to be well myelinated.

This understanding is important because it provides a neurological foundation for why deliberate practice works. By focusing intensely on a specific skill, you’re forcing the specific relevant circuit to fire, again and again, in isolation. This repetitive use of a specific circuit triggers cells called oligodendrocytes to begin wrapping layers of myelin around the neurons in the circuits—effectively cementing the skill. The reason, therefore, why it’s important to focus intensely on the task at hand while avoiding distraction is because this is the only way to isolate the relevant neural circuit enough to trigger useful myelination.”

“To be great at something is to be well myelinated.”

Myelin.

This is the secret sauce to greatness you can learn about in Dan Coyle’s Talent Code.

He recalls a story about LeBron James and how he deliberately practised developing his inside game with Hakeem Olajuwon. He slowed everything down, intensely focused on certain moves like he was a 7th grader picking something up for the first time.

It’s IMPOSSIBLE to imagine LeBron kinda sorta showing up, munching on an Oreo while dribbling with the other hand, stopping to respond to his latest text then going back to passively dribbling the ball. He’s INTENSELY FOCUSED.

Likewise, of course, WE are not going to create anything of value when our attention is fragmented by the latest push notification or email or whatever. We. Must. FOCUS!!!

Remember: Deep work = distraction-free concentration that stretches your cognitive capabilities to their limit while improving your skill and creating new value that is hard to replicate.

  ATTENTION RESIDUE

“The problem this research identifies with this work strategy is that when you switch from some Task A to another Task B, your attention doesn’t immediately follow—a residue of your attention remains stuck thinking about the original task. … ‘People experiencing attention residue after switching tasks are likely to demonstrate poor performance on that next task,’ and the more intense the residue, the worse the performance.

The concept of attention residue helps explain why the intensity formula is true and therefore explains Grant’s productivity. By working on a single hard task for a long time without switching, Grant minimizes the negative impact of attention residue from his obligations, allowing him to maximize performance on this one task.”

Attention residue. This is a really cool and Big Idea.

So, at this stage, most of us are pretty aware that multi-tasking is simply not possible. Although we can rapidly shift from one thing to another (diminishing our performance in both tasks!), we can’t do two things at once.

Let’s assume we get that and strive to focus on one thing at a time. Research shows that we STILL run into sub-optimal attention issues as we move from one meeting/project to another. A part of our attention is still focused on the last project. There’s a “residue” from it that diminishes our capacity to fully focus.

As Cal Newport’s book advises: “To produce at your peak level you need to work for extended periods with full concentration on a single task free from distraction. Put another way, the type of work that optimizes performance is deep work.”

Here’s to cleaning up the residue on our attention! (One key way? Create time blocks!!)

  THE FOUR RULES OF DEEP WORK

“Rule #1: Work Deeply Rule #2: Embrace Boredom Rule #3: Quit Social Media Rule #4: Drain the Shallows”

After establishing the *why* Deep Work is important, it’s important we move into the all-important practical HOW. Here are the four rules.

Rule #1: Work Deeply. It’s not enough to have the intention to work more deeply. We need to systematically install new routines and rituals to create new habits that will lead to more and more deep work. This is a hallmark of great humans.

Rule #2: Embrace Boredom. For some reason these days, the MOMENT we have a lull in our lives—whether that’s a few minutes before a friend arrives for lunch or in line at the grocery store or whatever—most of us immediately grab our smartphone and compulsively check out whatever we think we need to see right.this.second. We have about a hundredth of a second of tolerance for boredom.

If we want to create the capacity for more deep work, then feeding that beast is NOT a good idea.

It is important that rather than immediately flail around in the shallow end of the distraction pool, we need to EMBRACE BOREDOM. Use those moments to think or breathe deeply. Anything other than our habitual, addictive, impulsive, attention paper-cutting behaviors.

Rule #3: Quit Social Media. If there’s a poster child for shallow living, it’s social media. A logical

analysis is the fact that just because there’s a little benefit to things

like social media (e.g., staying connected to old friends, etc.), doesn’t mean it’s actually worth the time we give it.

If we REALLY want to live deeply—working and loving—we can do better than fritter away our time on social media. The bold among us shall quit it! I’ve never really engaged on the personal side of Facebook and, via the exercises in the book, got even more clarity that, if I’m committed to my deep work, it’s time for my social media time to be nearly eliminated. FUN! (You?!)

Rule #4: Drain the Shallows. The Shallows is the name of a book written capturing the essence of superficial living. (Written by a guy in retreat doing deep work, btw.) As we cultivate deep work, we need to systematically drain the shallow from our lives.

One of my big tips here? SCHEDULE EVERY MINUTE OF EVERY DAY. Not to drive yourself crazy, but to bring more mindfulness to your day.

We want to create big old time blocks (remember: The ONE Thing guys call this the #1 power tool of time management). Then, of course, be flexible as things evolve during the day but bring yourself back to your commitment to using your time consciously as you drain the shallows!

8 Steps to Deep Work and Becoming More Productive

ROUTINES TO RITUALIZE DEEP WORK

“That brings me to the motivating idea behind the strategies that follow: The key to developing a deep work habit is to move beyond good intentions and add routines and rituals to your working life designed to minimize the amount of your limited willpower necessary to transition into and maintain a state of unbroken concentration. If you suddenly decide, for example, in the middle of a distracted afternoon spent Web browsing, to switch your attention to a cognitively demanding task, you’ll draw heavily from your finite willpower to wrest your attention away from the online shininess. Such attempts will therefore frequently fail. On the other hand, if you deployed smart routines and rituals—perhaps a set time and quiet location used for your deep tasks each afternoon—you’d require much less willpower to start and keep going. In the long run, you’d, therefore, succeed with these deep efforts far more often.”

This is Rule #1 of how: We need to create routines and rituals to consistently rock it. Cal presents four different “depth philosophies” and gives examples of each—encouraging us to figure out which approach is optimal for us and go out and rock it. Super quick look:

Monastic Philosophy: Think of a monk in a monastery—removed from the little distractions of normal life. You’re essentially unplugged from the matrix and focused. It’s (obviously) not for everybody but an extraordinarily productive approach if you can pull it off. (This is basically me in my hermit-mode.)

Bimodal Philosophy: In this mode, you alternate between a monastic approach and a normally engaged mode. Cal shares the story of Carl Jung who alternated between a very engaged therapy practice/social life in Zurich and a totally removed monk-mode in his retreat house for writing.

Rhythmic Philosophy: The basic idea here is captured in Jerry Seinfeld’s “chain method” habit of writing a joke every day. In this mode, we’re less attached to a particular schedule and committed to having a “rhythm” of consistently creating—were, like, Seinfeld, we don’t want to break the chain of successful showing up and completing our daily deep work.

Journalistic Philosophy: In this mode, like a journalist who’s ready to write on deadline whenever the situation arises, you fit deep work into your schedule whenever you can. This is Cal’s main approach.

Obviously, check out the book for more. For now, know that we need to find our own philosophy.

Monastic/Bimodal/Rhythmic/Journalistic: Which one of those resonates the most for you?

  DISCIPLINE #1: FOCUS ON THE WILDLY IMPORTANT

“As the authors of The 4 Disciplines of Execution explain, ‘The more you try to do, the less you actually accomplish.’ They elaborate that execution should be aimed at a small number of ‘wildly important goals.’ This simplicity will help focus an organization’s energy to a sufficient intensity to ignite real results.

For an individual focused on deep work, the implication is that you should identify a small number of ambitious outcomes to pursue with your deep work hours. The general exhortation to ‘spend more time working deeply’ doesn’t spark a lot of enthusiasm. In a 2014 column titled, ‘The Art of Focus,’ David Brooks endorsed this approach of letting ambitious goals drive focused behaviour, explaining: ‘If you want to win the war for attention, don’t try to say ‘no’ to the trivial distractions you find on the information smorgasbord; try to say ‘yes’ to the subject that arouses a terrifying longing, and let the terrifying longing crowd out everything else.’”

Remember: It’s a HECK of a lot easier to say “No!” to shallow distractions when you have a REALLY BIG YES!

So, what WILDLY important thing fires you up?

Seriously. Let’s slow down and capture this.

What’s the #1 (challenging but feasible!) thing you’d most like to achieve over the next 6-12 months that would have a wildly awesome positive impact on your life?

My #1 WILDLY IMPORTANT goal = Write it down!

Fantastic. Here’s to going deep and prioritizing our lives around that #1—crowding out the distractions in the process.

  “SHUT-DOWN COMPLETE!”

“At the end of the workday, shut down your consideration of work issues until the next morning —no after-dinner e-mail check, no mental replays of conversations, and no scheming about how you’ll handle an upcoming challenge; shut down work thinking completely. If you need more time, then extend your workday, but once you shut down, your mind must be left free. … Decades of work from multiple different subfields within psychology all point toward the conclusion that regularly resting your brain improves the quality of your deep work. When you work, work hard. When you’re done, be done. Your average e-mail response time might suffer some, but you’ll more than make up for this with the sheer volume of truly important work produced during the day by your refreshed ability to dive deeper than your exhausted peers.” “When you work, work hard. When you’re done, be done.”

As Steven Kotler has said, although being in flow is incredibly rewarding in terms of creativity, productivity, learning and pure enjoyment, it’s also REALLY EXPENSIVE.

Dan Coyle echoed this as well. He retold a story about how he once wrote a piece on the world’s fastest men. He said when these guys weren’t racing they barely moved—they were professional nappers!

It takes a ton of energy to perform at a high level. And that demands a deep level of recovery. One GREAT way to do that is to have a hard stop at the end of every day. Cal makes a strong case for why this is so important and walks us through his personal end of the day ritual in which he basically does one final check of email to make sure he’s handled anything that’s urgent, looks over what was left undone and plans some time the next day to complete it then, as he turns off his computer for the night, he says to himself, “Shut-down complete!”

LOVE that. I do something similar. With my digital sunset, I turn off the computer and return it to its not-gonna-see-you-till-tomorrow home, appreciate all that’s been done, look ahead to the next day, clean up my desk so it’s in a ready-state for tomorrow morning and #done. Time to recover. I may need to add: “Houston. We’re shutting down. 3. 2. 1. Shut-down, complete.”

How about you?

Ready to start shutting down completely and giving that big, awesome brain of yours a chance to rest and recover?

  THE DEEP LIFE

“The deep life, of course, is not for everybody. It requires hard work and drastic changes to your habits. For many, there’s a comfort in the artificial busyness of rapid e-mail messaging and social media posturing, while the deep life demands that you leave much of that behind. There’s also an uneasiness that surrounds any effort to produce the best things you’re possible of producing, as this forces you to confront the possibility that your best is not (yet) that good. It’s safer to comment on our culture than to step into the Rooseveltian ring and attempt to wrestle it into something better.”

The deep life.

Are you ready to take the plunge?

Here’s to diving into the deep end as we optimise, actualise and give our greatest gifts in greatest service to the world!

Feeling enlightened? Download my ebook for free, for a limited time only at: 80 Ways To Find Your Purpose

The post How To Focus Your Concentration and Attention to Get Deep Work Done appeared first on Life Coach Preston | Business Coach Preston | Essentialise.

source https://www.essentialise.co.uk/deep-work-focus-productivity/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=deep-work-focus-productivity

[doomedandstoned]

Demonic Death Judge Unleashes Furious Fourth Full-Length ‘The Trail’

~Doomed & Stoned Debuts~

By Billy Goate

My gateway into doom may have started with Black Sabbath and Saint Vitus, but my discovery of sludge came by way of Eyehategod, Down, and High on Fire. It was one of those lazy Saturday afternoon listening adventures, where one thing led to another and another. Soon, I was clear on the other side of the world checking out a Finnish band called DEMONIC DEATH JUDGE.

Demonic Death Judge had the same bluesy NOLA tendencies as Down, but were like nothing I'd heard before, for they possessed the voice of a jackal hungry for flesh. You can hear it in "Filthy As Charged," which kicks off the album right after a minute-long acoustic, "Cougar Charmer" (an important landmark that will be revisited later in the album). Groovy seventies tendencies and super-charged sludge riffs are married to a ravenous verse and chorus combo describing a man on a mission of self-destruction and eventual self-discovery.

Our protagonist travels the road of debauchery into "Hardship," a swampy number with a sad undertone that connects to the roots of rock itself, the blues. The song made me think of walking along the riverbank alone, leaving something behind, with that feeling you can never begin again.

"Elevation," on the other hand, plays into the band's trademark sense of humor as the even more mischievous cousins of Red Fang. And, yes, I need me one of these shirts.

"Shapeshifting Serpents" was the first single and music video to be released from the new spin. It features a wandering psychedelic midsection that places us smack dab into the middle of the desert at midnight, where we meet a swirl of wordless visions.

"Flood" takes on a sober tone, though the same headbaning beat and mudslinging tendencies remain. How does Jaakko Heinonen go a whole set without losing his voice? He's definitely the wild man of the wilderness here. Oh, I need to mention there's a great Skynyrd-esque solo that greets us about three-and-a-half minutes in and I really liked it. Felt like a warm sunbreak in the midst of a murky downpour.

Some fine basswork and drumming are on display by Eetu Lehtinen and Lauri Pikka in "Fountain of Acid" (I also hear a saxophone somewhere in this swirling morass). Its abrupt ending transports us straightaway to the strumming acoustics of the opening theme (which for some reason brought me flashbacks of Nine Inch Nails’ "Help Me I Am In Hell"). It's as though everything we've just experienced had been a walking dream, a mirage. This time we're joined, appropriately, by harmonica.

The winding, dusty pathway leads us at last to the namesake track, which appears to be some kind of awakening. The Trail has brought a lost soul to this moment in time and finally he sees clearly. "Where to now?" is the only question remaining. It's the longest track of the lot at eight minutes and forty-nine seconds with a protracted period of instrumental reflection.

The closer "We Have to Kill" takes an optimistic footing, determined to kill the demons that have been plaguing him. A nice chain gang melody greets us just before the solo, then a return to the central chorus: "This time we will, this time have to, oh Lord we have to kill."

Chief riffer Toni Raukola (who does a fantastic job throughout the record) clues us into the method behind the band's madness:

The Trail began as a mindset, a Nevada desert scenery turned into soaring melodies tasting like light beer, whiskey shots, and sand. The concept eventually developed into a story of a person stuck in a loop of self-destructive behaviour and finding deliverance through an unexpected spiritual journey.

The album was completely recorded and produced by the band, and the recording process was based on performing as much live as possible. The result was then mixed by Andrew Schneider and mastered by Carl Saff who were 110% in tune with our ideas and production, which resulted in a killer sound.

The record forms its narrative through uncompromising groove and relentless, crushing riffs that DDJ is known for, however, introducing a wider array of psychedelic and atmospheric elements than before. The Trail is the most whole record to come from DDJ, and by far the best.

The Trail by Demonic Death Judge is a massive album that makes me hungry to see them live. I'm sure it would be a show matched only by Dopethrone (have the two ever played together?). Look for the record's release at the end of this week on March 27th via Suicide Records in digital format, CD, multiple variations of vinyl (pre-order here).

Give ear...

The Trail by Demonic Death Judge

Follow The Band

Get Their Music

[zanytimetravelenthusiast-blog]

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