#her life is falling apart a bit and i dont wanna add stress

[doveofmourning]

I'm gonna ruin this because I don't know how to be normal about having a crush unless I'm high apparently

[evak-skam]

Just Friends [elu au] // ch2

summary: Lucas has a giant crush on one of his friends (again, but this time it isn’t Yann), and once again said friend has a girlfriend. The thing that’s different this time around, though, is that Lucas has a girlfriend, too, which just adds to the pile of problems in his life. || College/Uni AU

CHAPTER TWO

“What are you doing?”

Lucas spins around with one hand gripping a t-shirt from his closet, the other hand loosely holding onto the one he had been wearing before. His blue eyes land on Yann rather quickly, who looks the slightest bit confused at his best friend shirtless while looking nervous as hell. “I’m having dinner with Eliott,” Lucas says.

Yann raises an eyebrow. He’s still a bit confused. “So, like... A date?”

“No.” 

“Then why are you so nervous?”

“Because it’s Eliott,” Lucas stresses to him, hoping that simple explanation would be enough for Yann.

Yann lets out a short hum. “Look, man,” he starts and then walks over to Lucas. He grabs one shirt and tosses it back in the closet and then walks off, Lucas glancing down at the shirt that he had been wearing earlier that day. “If that’s the case, don’t bother stressing over what shirt to wear. Start stressing about where to eat. You can both be pretty indecisive about that shit.”

Lucas rolls his eyes because, yeah, he can be indecisive about that but Yann doesn’t need to point it out so blatantly. Or, maybe he does. Because he has a point. He ignores that bit for now, though, and instead focuses on the first part as he slips his shirt back on. “But I don’t want to look like horse shit next to him. Have you seen Eliott?”

“Yes, actually.” Yann leans against the door frame and crosses his arms. “But hey -- listen, you have a girlfriend, Lucas, and whether you like her or not, you can’t go cheating on her. If you think anything can happen between you and Eliott, you gotta break up with Chloe first.”

Slowly, Lucas nods. He understands where Yann is coming from and why, and Lucas actually doesn’t plan on cheating on Chloe; she’s sweet and nice, the problem was just that he didn’t like her the way she wanted him to and he didn’t have the guts to break it off with her yet. He runs a hand through his hair and glances at his phone on the bed as it lights up with a new message. Lucas grabs it and sees that it’s from Manon, but he doesn’t answer or even read it. He tosses it back on the bed as Yann starts to talk again.

“Hope you have fun with him tonight though, bro,” Yann honestly says with a smile, beginning to leave Lucas’ room. “I gotta go so I’m not late. Don’t do anything Baz would do and don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!”

Lucas laughs. “That doesn’t leave me much room!”

Yann grins and laughs, flipping Lucas off as he walks away, the brunet shouting for his best friend to have fun. And then, Lucas was alone in the small apartment once the door shut loudly a few minutes later. He plops down on his bed as he thinks over everything that Yann had said moments earlier. It’s true that he has to break up with Chloe if he wants anything with Eliott, but the other problem is Eliott and Lucille; they’ve been together for four years, and Lucas really doubts that they will break up anytime soon. Groaning in frustration, Lucas falls backwards and throws an arm over his eyes, removing it a few moments later when he gets another message on his phone.

manon.demissy hey don’t forget to give mika & lisa the last bit of rent you owe them from living with them. they need it in 2 weeks. just wanted to remind you :) and can you help with a bake sale Wednesday? pretty please??

Lucas frowns. The rent. Fuck. He hasn’t lived there for at least a few months or so, but still he has yet to fully pay Mika and Lisa back from that time. And recently, between work and school and splitting rent with Yann, he’s forgotten about them a bit. He’s not about to let Manon know that, though, so he answers her as if nothing is wrong.

lucallemant dont worry i’ll get it to them depends. what do i get out of it?

manon.demissy some cupcakes daphy and I made. you love them!

lucallemant ...ok yeah i’ll help 

manon.demissy YAY thanks, you’re the best! love u lulu x

lucallemant lol you’re welcome. love you too

He chuckles to himself at Manon’s excitement before tossing his phone back on the bed, the smile soon going away as the thought of paying back Mike and Lisa consumed his mind. Up until four months ago he had the help of his dad. Now? Now, he’s on his own, because his mom couldn’t help at all, and he was a legal adult so it isn’t that big of a deal. It’s just paying two friends back from staying with them throughout most of his high school career and doing his best on not falling behind on rent in the current place he lived in with his best friend.

Lucas runs his hands down his face, wondering how the hell he got stuck in his situation. Well, he doesn’t have to wonder for too long, because the terrible fights with his father come back, especially that big one that ended up with him knocking on Yann’s doorstep in tears after leaving his dad’s place, unable to go to his mom’s because he didn’t want to disturb her, or even Mika’s because he had lost the key. He groans, pressing the palms of his hands against his eyes, pushing those memories of that night away before abruptly getting up and going to the living room to watch some TV.

It’s dark outside. He’s hungry. Nothing good is currently playing on TV. And Eliott is no where to be seen. Lucas has texted Eliott a few times, trying to figure out where the older guy was and if he’s actually coming. Actually, it wasn’t even a few times. Lucas spammed Eliott, and even called him a few times. Each time, he never answered. At first, Lucas got worried. Then angry. Then worried again, because Eliott never intentionally ignores Lucas for this long. But then, suddenly, Lucas was angry again.

srodulv sorry, I had a sudden change of plans. raincheck?

Lucas rolls his eyes. He probably shouldn’t be so mad, but he was. Or, maybe it was disappointment he felt. Either way, he replied with a short ‘sure whatever’ and laid across the couch, sulking and brewing in his own jealousy and frustration at himself. Because, of course, his plans with his crush wouldn’t go as he wanted them too. Not at all. 

His phone then lights up again and he doesn’t want to look at it -- he wants to be a bit petty and just ignore Eliott completely, not even wanting to let Eliott know he read the message. But he reads it anyway, curiosity getting the best of him.

srodulv hey don’t be mad. lucille surprised me with dinner reservations

Lucas just stares at the message. Of course it Lucille had been involved. He can still be petty, right? Right. So, he left Eliott on read and with another roll of his eyes, he locks his phone and puts it on the coffee table, only to reach for it a minute later. He got out of his messages with Eliott to send a message to someone else. He could tell already that he was going to regret his descion later, but at the current moment in time Lucas Lallemant doesn’t care. The slightest bit hurt and hungry, he can’t care that much right now.

lucallemant hey, chloe! wanna grab some food with me? but just to mcdonalds or something. nothing fancy

It doesn’t take too long for Chloe to answer, sending him an excited yes, and then Lucas is turning off the TV and slipping on some shoes, not bothering to change into different clothes before telling Chloe to just meet up with him there. He then grabs his wallet and the key to the apartment, and leaves.

The walk to McDonalds isn’t a long walk at all, so Lucas gets there rather quickly. He stays outside of the white, yellow and red building as he waits for Chloe, staying on his phone most of the time. He doesn’t know how long he stood there, but suddenly a pair of small arms were around him and lips were pressed to his cheeks. It startles him at first until his brain makes the connection that the person is Chloe and not some creepy stranger, and he puts on a smile as he puts his phone in his pocket. He hugs her back and then moves away, motioning with his head to the entrance of the fast food place.

“C’mon, lets go. I’m starving,” he says.

Chloe nods. “Oh, same here. Lunch wasn’t so good today, and I’ve only had a couple of snacks. Didn’t eat breakfast, either,” she tells him as they go in, quietly thanking Lucas as he holds open the door for her. “And you’re paying, right? I kinda assumed, I’m sorry, but-.”

“No, its fine,” Lucas says, interrupting her.

And, honestly, it wasn’t fine; he hadn’t been planning on paying for Chloe’s food as well, which is a dumb conclusion on his part of things, but that just takes more out of what he was going to pay Mika back with. The lie wasn’t noticed by Chloe, thankfully, so that tiny bit of conversation ends rather quickly, and soon Lucas is paying for them both after they order. It pains him somewhat because, fuck, that meant he has to work a bit more these upcoming couple of weeks and he really didn’t want to – but he didn’t want to face Mika’s wrath, either. So, he doesn’t complain about it or say anything to Chloe, and just pays for the food without any words coming from him. Then not too long after, the two college students are sitting across from one another at one of the smaller tables, enjoying the fast food.

“Thank you for this, Lucas,” Chloe speaks up after they’re both about halfway done.

He looks up from devouring his burger and to Chloe. Thinking of his manners first, he chews and swallows, then gave a tiny, thin lipped smile. “No problem,” he says. “I needed to eat, so did you. I didn’t want to go alone, so…” He trails off and shrugs, not including anything about Eliott.

They talk to each other for the next half an hour or so as they finish eating. It wasn’t as miserable like Lucas had believed it was going to be earlier on his walk to McDonalds, but it wasn’t the best, either. During their conversations, he genuinely laughs – they both do, actually – and doesn’t mind being in Chloe’s company, but he would much rather be with someone else which puts everything a bit more on the downside. Despite having an okay time, he doesn’t try to reach for her hand or anything like that. She clearly wants him to, but he just doesn’t budge. He stays leaned back in his seat, occasionally checking his phone incase Yann got back before him, or incase Eliott decided to try and text him again.

Their little hangout – Lucas refuses to call it a date – then comes to an end. But before either of them leave, Lucas rushes to the bathroom just to have a few short minutes by himself before Chloe tries to kiss him at some point. And then he walks out, only to want to rush back into the bathroom and hide. There stands Eliott with Lucille in line to order something, both dressed nicely from head to toe, and Lucas felt his mouth fall open at the sight of his crush – both from surprise and how good he looks. Lucas, now panicking, spins in a small circle because he has no idea what to do. Oh, how badly he wants to go and hide in the bathroom, but unfortunately he can’t leave Chloe there. Well, he could. He would just have a girl pissed at him afterward.

So, Lucas puts on a brave face and looks down at his phone, acting as if he was texting someone, as he walks by, only looking up as he got closer to Chloe. He puts on another smile, seeing she threw away the trash already and forces himself to take her hand as she stands up. She then kisses him and it throws him off for a split second until he reminds himself he has to kiss her back, and he does. And then they leave.

“Chloe?”

Almost leave, he should say. Just as they got to the door, Lucille noticed Chole, recognizing the younger girl from that led to all four of them hanging out, which then led to Lucas and Eliott being alone and thus causing the current problem Lucas has.

Chloe gasps and rushes to Lucille, the two girls hugging, and Lucas slowly walks up. “Hi! How are you, Lucille? You look amazing!”

“Thank you, so do you! What about you? Oh- hi, Lucas, sorry.”

Lucas gives her a small, obviously forced smile. “Hey.” Then, he looks up at Eliott, the smile falling. He doesn’t say anything.

Eliott is obviously surprised to see Lucas, too, but the shorter boy doesn’t say anything about it; he just stays standing there. Both of them do. All the while, their girlfriends are happily conversing beside them. “Lucas, I- I didn’t mean to blow you off like that,” Eliott eventually speaks. “I’m sorry.”

Lucas shrugs nonchalantly despite screaming on the inside. “It’s fine,” he says, tone short. It just made Eliott frown. Lucas sighs. He hates seeing Eliott upset. So, he tries again, this time sounding much nicer than before. “It’s fine, truly,” he says again. “We can talk more tomorrow at school if we see each other, okay?”

“Okay.”

Lucas gives him a tiny smile and then gets Chloe’s attention. The two say bye to Eliott and Lucille, and then leave.

And once Lucas got home, he falls face first into his bed, wanting to scream and maybe even cry.

[nocvil]

*            ‐            ․            ↺            𝙄𝙉𝙏𝙍𝙊𝘿𝙐𝘾𝙄𝙉𝙂 . . .  ｓｏｏ ｂｏｇｕｍ . hitman        .        caretaker        .        the heel        .        a masked hell        .

❝   my love     ,     my love     ,     my love     ,     won't you stay a while     ?   ❞

possible tw’s below: parental death mention, illness mentions, murder for hire mentions, and uh m,,, i think that’s it rlly. just warning ok.

GENERAL INFO

full name: soo bogum ( 수 보검 ). nickname(s): bo, sweetie pie to his mother (: gender & pronouns: cismale, he/him. sexual & romantic orientation: aromantic, demisexual. age & dob: twenty-five, november 8th, 19-- birthplace/hometown: seoul, sk. parents/siblings: only child, deceased father, living mother. pet(s): absolutely not LOL. astrological sign: scorpio. >:-) dominant hand: both! handwriting style: mostly writes in very slanted cursive. i feel like when you see things like royal documents signed or very important letters written back in the day with that vintage cursive ... that would be bogum. language(s) known/spoken: spanish, english, korean. religion: LOL. ok. current living arrangements: a two-bedroom, two bath apartment complex with his older, npc mother. it is pretty spacious given they both have their own room, a kitchen, dining space, their own bathrooms, and a patio. bo has the money if you kno what i mean ... (: occupation/major: hitman.

PHYSICAL

picture reference: uhh... this? this look rlly gives off bogum vibes so (: blood type: type O. nationality: korean. skin tone/color: lighter tanned. birthmarks & scars: heheh wouldn’t u like to kno ??? height: five-foot ten inches. 5′10″. build: pretty average, more on the lean/athletic side though. hair color: red. hair length: uhm ,, look at reference photo? eye color: brown. diet: uhm ... bo has a pretty average diet probably. he would eat just about anything, not very picky. i think he probably has his favorites when it comes to chips and candy but he doesn’t have a special diet. exercise & level of fitness: LOOOL. let me not make a bad joke here ): how’s their posture ( or lack thereof )?: bogum probably has really good posture! i think standing tall with a straight back probably adds to his uh... authoritative look?  typical style of dress: ( from his stats page ) dresses a bit old school, vintage?, almost plain. likes wearing tucked in and cuffed shirts, rolled up pants, boots, baseball caps, at least three rings on one hand, gold bracelets. the following outfits aren’t specific to him but they are probably kinda similar. it’s hard to rlly find exact examples ): (  1  /  2  /  3  /  4  ) body modifications: none, surprisingly. probably pierced ears that he never puts earrings in. that’s really it though. he would prob like a tattoos but wouldn’t do it for the sake of his career ( because tattoos are distinguishing features ).

MANNERISMS

how does your muse walk?: def with a bit of power in his step. very protective when he is with his mother. mostly, he would walk like he calculates every single step he takes. how does your muse talk?: HAHA i just talked about this with myungok’s mun ,, he would talk very plain and probably without a lot of emotion. this would make things that are usually out of pocket probably sound kinda weird.  what accent/dialect does your muse talk with?: he is from seoul and according to google, they speak with a gyeonggi dialect there (: how would you describe the tone of their voice? are they loud or quiet?: QUIET... shh... if you speak too loud you won’t hear bogum speaking with such monotoned you could probably fall asleep. bogum asmr when?  what does their laugh sound like?: bogum? LAUGHING? i feel like bogum chuckles. so he would have like a short, quiet laugh. how does your muse typically smell?: either like smoke from a cigarette or like his mom’s perfume. what kind of air do they carry?: well jinae’s mun said he would have a dark and heavy presence and honestly that rlly fits the bill. do they have a(ny) catchphrase(s)?: time to die. what are their nervous ticks?: um.. not sure. probably knuckle cracking and finger tapping.

PSYCHOLOGY

what makes your muse happiest?: his mommy! seeing his mom thrive and gain her confidence back, even momentarily, makes him so happy. what upsets them the most?: ugh. listen. i talked abt this with some of y’all but the thought that if he ever got exposed or arrested ... how everyone in his life, including his mother, would just abandon him ... CRIES. was this supposed to be a general question? does your muse have any quirks?: i think his tendency to just be way too lax in certain situations would be his infamous quirk. what are their hobbies? how frequent do/can they do them?: bogum is definitely a simple man. he would totally like puzzles, word searches, watching the news, scrapbooking ( YES, SCRAPBOOKING ), taking walks, shopping with his mom, writing, idk, he doesn’t do anything OD or over the top. shrug. do they have any guilty pleasures?: is your muse an extrovert or an introvert? neither?: 10000% introverted otl. do they have high or low self-esteem? what about confidence?: uhm... bogum probably has an average amount of confidence/self-esteem. he’s a realist, definitely. if he look ugly he look ugly. if he look good he look good. ‘nuff said. are they easily stressed and how do they normally respond to it?: stressed? bogum could be in the midst of a bank robbery and be sitting there like ok, y’all done yet? what is your muses worst fear?: his mother finding out about his job. what is your muses biggest dream?: to either escape his job for good or to be able to heal his mother of all her injuries and illnesses. but of course, neither of those will ever happen! is your muse a morning person or a night dragon?: a night dragon? ok. anyway he is probably both. i can see bogum getting like four hours of sleep and waking up like (: let’s fuckin go! how intelligent is your muse? do they acknowledge it?: OH BOGUM has street smarts but definitely probably not book smarts. at least, not a great amount of book smarts. how can he be a hitman if he’s DUMM?! describe their sense of humor: LMAO. the real question is how can someone as funny as ME play someone as BORING as bogum?

RELATIONSHIP TENDENCIES

are they currently in any sexual or romantic relationships?: HELL NO. luuuul. what is their experience with relationships?: to really think about it, bo probably had feelings for people here and there and most likely dated short term in high school but after he moved and began doing that he kind of lost all his effort to pursue romance. how does your muse view the idea of friends with benefits? have they ever had one? would they ever?: another hell naw to that sis. how important is sex to your muse?: not important at all. bogum could care less. what are their biggest turn on and turn offs?: see above pls. does your muse find it easy to make friends?: i say yes, only because most of his friends are through his mother. how important is friendship to them?: veRY IMPORTANT if bogum didn’t have the friends he has today, he probably would be a lot more sad and maybe more than just a hitman ): quantity or quality of friends?: quality! how important is family?: VERY IMPORTANT AGAIN bogum would give his life for his mother and to have his father back. are they close to their family? why or why not ?: YES. obviously asdfasdf everyone probably knows why. although bogum is now the one who runs the house, he still really values his mother because she ultimately has nobody but him in the end if she gets worse. his parents were always really good to him and when his father died, he knew that he and his mother had to stick together through it. he also knew that that he had to step up to provide for his mother because of her injuries and dementia. she is his life, really.

FAVORITES

activity: haha. you really wanna kno?... he likes word searches a lot. animal: idk. probably like. idk.  beverage: mmmm some piping hot tea. book: - color: is red cliche to say? designer: - food:  flower:  water lilies, pansies, lilies, peonies, idk, he would love all kinds of flowers. gem: i googled these. if he had a favorite it would be garnet, smoked topaz, and morion. holiday: christmas! his mother’s favorite too, probably. mode of transportation: walking, usually. movie: -  musical artist: oh boy, uhm,, i bet bogum likes indie kpop. like dean, suran, hyukoh, but i dont rlly know a lot to give you more details. quote / saying: - scenery: hm. probably night time in the living room, mom is put to bed already, he’s watching a rerun episode of a crime drama on television and thinking about how it’s so unrealistic. he’s got a beer in one hand and a cigarette in the other though he puts it out halfway through because he loses interest. (: scent: i think he’d like the smell of cleaning products, flower scents ( bc it would remind him of his mom ), and metal (: obviously. weather: cloudy or rainy weather. anything that let’s him stay inside for the day. vacation destination: UM. i bet bogum would like to travel out of country to places like europe.

ATTITUDES

greatest dream: to finally have a peaceful life with his mother by his side, healthy or not. he wants to stop being a hitman, really, but it’s kind of like an addiction, plus he’s good at it, and it brings in the bacon. greatest fear: being caught and leaving his mother by herself -- it would be like the ultimate let down since he doesn’t trust anyone with her. most at east when: pls see scenery in section above. least as ease when: out in public by himself. he doesn’t have his mom as his cover. worst possible thing that could happen: PLS SEE GREATEST FEAR. ajdfkjasdfskf biggest achievement: moving to seoul safely with his mom! biggest regret: falling back into the crime life. most embarrassing moment: idk i feel like bogum isn’t embarrassing. he’s too ,, plain. biggest secret: LMAO well ... i think we all know. top priorities: keeping his mom safe, alive, healthy, and her bills paid for. also keeping himself undercover for the most part and making sure neither him or his mother are overwhelmed.

EXTRA TIDBITS

001. bogum is an unhealthy smoker but a social drinker. he never smokes around his mother though.

002. whenever bogum’s mother is around, he is on his own best behavior. he always does his best to be nice and keep up an image of her sweet son although by himself he can be different.

003. so far the only person who knows about his job is sangwoo because he sort of saw him in the act during his first hit. the two joke about it but bogum would take him out in a heartbeat if he spills.

004. i think it’s funny because i always pictured bogum as that person would give the shirt off of his back for you if you were in trouble. but he also wouldn’t hesitate to threaten to make you disappear.

005. his mom doesn’t know how he gets the money to pay for everything but bogum has her believing he “has his ways” and to “just trust him” although she asks about it every now and then.

006. though he stays inside a lot, some of the places you might see bogum outside of his apartment, are grocery stores close to his place, bars around town, museums, little cafes picking up things for his mother, dawon’s flower shop, and very occasionally places where there are a lot of drug activity.

007. here is smth: bogum is a hitman because his father was killed in a hit!

008. despite his mom questioning where he earns his money, his family has always been pretty well off but that was because of his father. so now that his father isn’t alive, it’s kind of ... fishy.

009. lmao probably your very typical scorpio minus the s*xual stuff.

010. my brain stopped working.

AESTHETICS

a card hand full of royals. empty, dark hospital hallways. dirty hands under black leather gloves. an empty, lonely wheelchair. old black and white photographs. an ashtray full of half smoked cigarettes. ripped up diary pages. rolled up fifty dollar bills. two expensive rings on each finger. responding “k” to a paragraph long text message. tri-folded letters written in the upmost calligraphy. roman numeral clocks.