#hhhh we'll see what happens

[museofvoid]

Just remembered when I woke up today that this year is the 20 year anniversary for Pirates of the Caribbean! I gotta make fanart holy shit. And I should do a cosplay! Fuck I gotta really appreciate potc this year

[andmakeithome]

hmm having complicated feelings about mcq's comments on Ethan and Ilsa's relationship...on the one hand yeah it's good to not go w the typical ride off into the sunset love interest ending and the ending can still be happy but like. idk I just really want them to end up together lmao 😭

[tboybuck]

18. “I shouldn’t be in love with you.” 💕💕

hhhh i love this prompt thank you so much <33 prompts from this post.

Y'know that thing people always say? About how absence makes the heart grow fonder? Yeah. Eddie gets it now.

It's been five months since Robin whisked Steve away to Chicago so she'd have someone close while she's in college, and if Eddie thought he had it bad for Steve while he was right there at his side all summer long, it's got nothin' on how bad he's got it now. Steve calls him every other Saturday, and Eddie watches the phone all fuckin' day waiting for the damn thing to ring.

It's not like they don't see each other. Steve came home with Robin over Christmas, and he spent most of his time here at the trailer with Eddie. They're not a thing, not really. They're touchy and affectionate with each other, but they always have been. That's no different than it was the summer they spent in each other's orbit, never too far out of arm's reach from one another.

But they're not a thing, because Eddie's too much of a coward to risk their friendship by confessing his feelings when there's a very real chance he's being fucking delusional.

The thing is, though, Steve doesn't call anyone else on the kind of schedule that he calls Eddie. And when he calls, they stay on the phone for hours. There shouldn't even be that much to catch up on, but Eddie finds himself making note of every little thing that happens in Hawkins that he wishes Steve could be there for.

On Eddie's birthday at the end of January, decidedly not one of their designated call days, Steve calls him. It's two minutes after midnight and Eddie's got his guitar in his lap and a pencil wedged behind his ear, and the phone rings.

"Happy birthday," Steve says quietly when Eddie picks up the phone.

Eddie twists the phone cord around his fingers. "Thanks, Stevie."

"Was I first?"

Eddie huffs out a laugh. "Yeah. Didn't even give anybody else a chance. It's barely midnight. Shouldn't you be in bed? You have work tomorrow, don't you?"

"Mmm," Steve says, a little sound of confirmation. "Wanted to call anyway. So what do you want for your birthday this year?"

You.

Eddie's overcome with that feeling again, the tingle all the way down to his toes when he thinks about how gone he is on Steve, when he imagines his smile and his laugh and the warmth of him at his side. Eddie misses him a little more every single day.

"I mean... I dunno if you could deliver, Stevie."

"Try me."

Eddie aches. It's like Steve is begging him to say it. He wants to say it. So badly.

"I shouldn't."

"You shouldn't what?"

"I shouldn't be in love with you," Eddie whispers, and then he holds his breath.

It's quiet. Steve is too quiet for too long and oh, god, he's done it now. Stupid. That was so stupid. Such an idiotic thing to say, fuck.

"I'm coming home this weekend," Steve says at last. "I'm coming home to see you and take you out."

"Because...?" Eddie's voice shakes with hope.

"Because I... I haven't felt this way about anyone in a real long time. You really couldn't tell? We almost kissed on New Years, Eds."

"Well, y'know..." Eddie stammers. "Thought I imagined that."

He remembers how close they'd been that night, how Steve's breath had smelled of beer, how Steve looked at Eddie's mouth before Eddie'd turned away from him. Here he'd been thinking he'd stopped himself from making a stupid, terrible mistake.

"I can't play it cool anymore. Being away from you has been..."

"Hard," Eddie finishes for him.

"Yeah. I wanna try this with you. I wanna try... us. That okay?"

"Seems too good to be true."

"Maybe it is. We'll never know unless we try, right?"

Eddie twists the phone cord around his fingers again and tries to hide his smile behind the receiver, even though Steve's not here to see how stupid and love drunk he looks right now.

"Sooo... I did manage to charm you with my irresistible good looks and excellent taste in music?"

"Something like that," Steve says, and there's a smile in his voice. "I'll see you this weekend."

"Can't wait."

"Happy birthday, Eds. I... I'm sorry it took me so long."

"Better late than never, big boy."

still taking requests!

[carica-ficus]

“Nona the Ninth”

20/07/2024

Reading progress: 477/477 (100%) Read through since last update: 203

The final stretch! Since I've had a free day yesterday, so I decided to binge the rest of the book and it was so worth it.

Alas, the final notes:

YEESSSS!!! RAGE!! TIME FOR VIOLENCE!!!!!

Hhhh Nona's meltdown is so freeing. There was SO much tension that has built up these last few days and she took it like a champ.

Ngl, I read that part as the frustration that comes out when you're finally done masking for so long. And I mean, Nona literally mentions it in the text too. That she's wearing a mask that looks like her face. Love to see it. It's comforting in a strange way. Mostly because I get it.

Fuck. Yeah, we learn about Earth's demise. We learn about the ways humans try to escape it. We learn about the consequences. But hearing John say that they needed to get the second wave of ships ready before the next round of climate starvation really hit. Humanity really is fucked. And not just in this book.

Not the fucking cows again.

Dying of curiosity. I mean... Is she wrong? (We'll see.)

Oh, fuck. It's not Ianthe's body.

This changes everything.

It changed nothing. Except that it might have made some things worse.

Of course it's Harrow's body. I did think that to myself somewhere in the middle of the book. Like - wouldn't it be SO funny if Harrow, who was always forced to calculate everything and be 3 steps ahead of everyone else, is replaced by Nona who depends on others to survive and has no idea what the fuck's happening? And there we all have it.

ALSO.

The storyline of Harrow working so much and trying to recover after all that grief and anger and sadness becoming a person that is going through recovery, who is loved and loves others, who is struggling so much to find herself, but doesn't know how to function on her own... It's such a powerful take on mental health and everything that comes along with trauma and recovery. This is such a good book.

Is it Gideon AGAIN???

That would be so fucking funny HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Okay. She's not. But it's so much worse! Hahahahaha 🙃🙃🙃

HSJDNDNJSKSKSKSKS PALAMEDES AND CAMILLA MY BELOVED ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

No pain meds. - Every pain medication you have, please.

AAAAAAA they're so ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Oh, yeah. There it goes again. Is Nona hard of hearing? I didn't really think about this element that much, but it does appear several times. She can understand others and multiple languages only if she sees them speak.

Ok. That John chapter was something.

And I know he's a shitty guy. I do. But I get it.

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA not the Sixths doing math ALOUD in the Convoy to entertain themselves

Paul?

Sure, ok. Why not.

This kinda reminds me of that scene where Lapis (from Steven Universe) calls herself Bob during the baseball episode. Can't believe I remember that since I haven't watched the show in ages.

SUSS?????

THEN PERISH???

Okay, so much happened at the end that I just didn't want to put the book away in order to comment, so here's some thoughts at the end.

JOHN YOU DICKHEAD AAAAAAAAAAAAA

On the other hand, I am in LOVE with the way his character is written - from a perfect being to a selfish, deceitful and greedy man. I loved the way he captured Alecto. I love how he brought her into the tomb like a child, and she was in awe of everything he showed her. It's so raw. It's so sickening and repulsive and violating.

AND I LOVE that Alecto is basically the soul of the Earth. And I love that she is just a girl. That she just wants to live and love and be loved.

And that ending. AAAAA So cool. So so so so so cool. Love it.

I'm so happy I finally finished Nona. It is such a gorgeous book and I loved every bit of it. With each book I just fall more in love with the world and the characters, and I'm in awe of Muir's capability to make me appreciate every single character, no matter their background, morality or goals. Man, this story will stay with me for a long time, if not forever.

[littlesislovesyou]

That's good to hear...and would me boldly groping and holding you close to me in public turned that good into a great? ; p but you're right it is a shame...I'll find the right mall next time though promise~ 🤭🔪 And yeah I feel you on that. That's pretty much how I was when we met via asks and the only breaks I got were literally when my brain and body refused to rest and work lunch breaks. But otherwise my energy could not be lower lmaoooo I fear we're running on horny adrenaline fumes when we tease each other and we'll just end up cuddling up together and having you cockwarm me while we watch something together...but I'm sorry to hear you're exhausted and I'm sure work didn't help 😭 wish we could get more free time so we can relax more often and we can maybe talk more that way too <3333 And I get ya days off help but energy's not been able to recharge with just that...awww that's so sweet hun! I've been thinking about you throughout my work time as well 💗💗💗💗

I wonder what you were thinking about me though...and oooh I wondered why the name of band sounded so familiar lmaooooo after my cousin was born and I'd spent my free time from school to babysit and spend time with him. He'd have that music constantly playing...I think when he grew older he never forgot a specific song that looped all the time and is still in my head to this day lol think it was called stressed out or that was the lyric I remember outside of wishing we can turn back time! And hey nothing with what you like. Emo teen phase or no. Sometimes you can't help when something is good or when you just can't get enough of it lol I hope you enjoy it! Do tell me about it 🖤

Yeah I can't control it rn unfortunately but I'll have to with micro managing class work and normal work ontop of getting time to destress and relax XD ty though I appreciate that and I'm glad that makes you happy. You just generally brighten up my day when we get to talk. Whether we're teasing each other or just talking about whatever comes to mind! <3333

I'm happy to hear that and I enjoy your company more~ 💕

Wouldn't have it any other way either sweet girl 💗

Yeah well the weird emo teen phase as you'd call it is definitely something that I constantly run into when YouTube recommends me music mixed with old classic music from my family lol

I don't keep up with celebrity music and rap constantly or at all though. Not really alot of time to go searching for music of interest...I just kinda let YouTube hit me with em randomly and I check them out of curiosity.

I remembered skillet and thousand year door recently so that's fun LMAOOO

Nothing special though we all like what we what right? And that's all that matters 😅 not gonna judge other people for what they're into or what music they like when my brain exists lol

You know I am very curious to see if you accidentally forget to turn anon on accidentally;) I wouldn’t even post it though unless you’d want me too but I know it happens and I am just curious!! Hhh 🥺 sorry I’ve been smoking a little tonight or well honestly a lot but idk if I’m making sense hhh 🖤🖤

You know I’m really glad we can talk as well<3 I really enjoy your company!

I hope your day was well though at least, and I hope you rest well tonight💕 sending you good vibes my lovely stalker mutual ~ ! 🥺 hehe

You know I totally understand, if I’m not home I’m probably at work and if I’m at work I probably don’t stop if only for a little while so my energy is always just gone anymore, i mean you already know I will consistently fr read your asks you send and watch out for them all the time<3 as soon as I see you’ve sent one I read it like hhhh you definitely have me addicted and obsessed with you 🖤🖤

And hey I mean I’ve found a lot of my music through just letting YouTube play it comes in handy!

I love music, there’s really just some beautiful songs out there and just talented people it’s crazy hhh

;’( hhh I probably sound like a dumb bimbo half the time on these, I mean not that I don’t like that, but I don’t know, I mean I know I do heh, your dumb bimbo of course<3333

I appreciate you though understanding and just again for checking in on me💗 I appreciate that a lot

[goodfully]

what another insane cliffhanger... my goodness, okay finished with the second book!!!! i just need to ramble a bit.

since i just finished it, i have thoughts on nino.. tbh i was quite fond of him initially but then he got increasingly unbearable haha the way he... says to lenu that since childhood he imagined a life where he, lenu, and lila would be together, and then.. uhm wow..! where the hell does he go! hahaha well maybe ill feel differently about him in the next book.

ngl tho, esp during that part with the elena/lila/nino drama, i was so stressed.. it just kept going!!! and kept feeling like so much!!!! wow. i had just kept thinking that theyd all best sit down and be honest with their feelings for each other and then form a poly relationship and run away together or something idk hahaha

okay i think one of my most favorite things about this book is how important every character feels. obviously we have lenu and lila, but like the rest of the cast?? they were not just some random childhood friends mentioned in the first book, they all are growing up too and are experiencing lives of their own. i think this book, more than in the first book, showed a lot of parent/child relationships, mm like how much we fear to become our parents.. to be inevitably trapped in the same fate as theirs. its in my mind a lot, about how much the things that happened to my own parents affect me. ahh elenas relationship with her mother.. despite how badly she wishes to not become like her mother, i think she does see her strength and her care for her... (oh god, like when she was sick and her mom comes out of nowhere?? and i think she was torn between feeling embarrassed by her and how capable her mother really was) oh and things like both antonio and ada becoming in different ways like their mother, stefano resembling don achille, lila fearing her son will be stupid, etc and ofc also just... the weight on all of their shoulders to.. hurry up and grow up? ahh. ///tw death tw suicide/// for the peluso siblings to witness their father be literally dragged out their house in front of them for allegedly murdering another man, hearing about his death in prison, busting the door down and seeing their mother hang herself. for the cappuccio siblings to only have their mother, who needed her children to care of her and her mental state more than she could take care of them. hhhh

that reminds me, the whole book i was hoping for more enzo content hahaha we really barely know anything about him at this point but i adore him. and he is there now! altho i wonder how much more we'll hear of him in the next books.

oh yeah, lila talking crazily about educating all the children to make a change starting with their generation... just like me for real... this is pretty much the main reason i studied early education hahaha its silly now when i think about it, but i used to feel like my skull was breaking from how much i felt i needed to find a way to take care and educate of all the children in the world in order to make some sort of difference... to find a way to get every single child to experience love and care from a loving and caring family... god. anyway i mean i still do believe that taking care of and educating the young ppl of our generation can change the world somehow, but it was just rather.. sad? seeing lila go crazy about her son and her very real fear for her son, that he might become like her and her family, unable to escape violence and poverty.

all this talk about a book centered on elena and not a single word about lenu yet ahhh my bad! oh i want to talk about her years at the university, and... gosh. just knowing you just lack something that your classmates from a rich family and background have that youll never have... even tho she quite literally graduated with top scores, she never felt fully capable? never felt enough? the need to work so hard to suppress herself in order to be okay in that city?? aghfh

alright, the ending! with her realizing that her novel (that she described as something that was truly hers to pietro) was basically born out of and deeply connected to lilas blue fairy book... god!!!!! what the hell!!!!! my goodness. she quite literally describes how theyre soulmates, how theyre connected by an invisible thread, how much they mustnt lose each other anymore. and when they finally met again and she finally realizes that "in the world there is nothing to win, that her life was full of varied and foolish adventures as much as mine, and that time simply slipped away without any meaning, and it was good just to see each other so often to hear the mad sound of the brain of one echo in the mad sound of the brain of the other." sobs. i think throughout most of the book, i so desperately wanted the two of them to just... be okay and stop being in constant war with themselves for each other.. but anyway wow, even tho for this second book the two of them arent with each other most of the time, the way their relationship is so hhhhh described so well and is always relevant, its so real wow its so real.

okay done... mm i was thinking that lenu is probably the more relatable character, but i think i identify a lot more with lila? not really bc of her life or the way acts, but the way she thinks maybe? the way she feels about ppl? idk actually, but its probably affecting the way im reading the series. mm starting tmr i wont have as much time as i do now to read, but im hoping i get through the next two books before the end of next month at least!

[dbphantom]

So I rewatched ep1 and 2 of Trigun Stampede with my friend and it got us thinking about the upcoming plot/structure of the show, namely if we get a season 2 what's gonna be the catalyst for it

AKA we have a very specific wishlist for this show and watch it be thrown out the window when episode 3 airs lmao

Spoilers under the cut

No, seriously, those virus explodey things are a total wildcard. Anything could happen! It's so exciting! But here's our take (big thank you to @moscovus for being a great friend and nerding out with me tn):

We were talking mostly about the map and the structure of the world, and because July is still around and hasn't happened yet, if The Destruction will happen during the show. Mainly because it feels like the map will start showcasing the party's adventure across it as the season goes on, and we can't help but notice July is placed perfectly on the right across from our party's starting place, with an orphanage smack dab in the middle. Plus there's a landmark with its name cut off on the far left which seems... Sus. That or the version of the show we watched was just ever so slightly zoomed in. Either or.

So the main theory is that the season 1 finale will be the events of July and Vash will get his iconique 60 bil bounty at the end of s1 because of Knives, leaving season 2 (+??) to cover the already written events of the story. Basically s1 is going to be introducing characters (a little out of order from what we're used to, but still), getting us used to the world/story, and then setting up/paying off with the July incident. So maybe that will be when the whole plant/angel arm reveal to the audience happens in this iteration (or maybe that will be a mid season finale type deal). Then the rest of the main story events will play out in s2 (+?????).

We're thinking changes mean Roberto + Meryl will be in July when the destruction happens and most importantly Roberto will die (or otherwise be written out) as the end of his character arc. My friend suggested his arc being him becoming less jaded as they follow Vash around and learn about Love and Peace. Specifically, we think Roberto will die so that in season 2 (if we get a s2, that's the HINGE) Meryl will get a second partner in Milly because We Want Her Back

Also in general we've come to the agreement that even if Wolfwood is introduced immediately [aka next episode] if he dies this season it's going to feel like an any% wolfwood dies speedrun with how fast everything seems to be progressing. That plus how young he looks, we're thinking maybe we will get a timeskip (kinda like the 5th moon incident timeskip) after the s1 finale (again, hypothetically/hopefully the destruction of July) and we'll actually get to see him change designs bc of the super fast metabolism stuff. AKA this is our plea: bring his tits back.

Also, if July happens during the season finale, then Knives will need time to incubate and heal. What better time to do that than during a between-seasons timeskip.

Anyway. Yeah. Wishlist:

Season 2 pls we love this so much already and we want MORE

July is the season 1 finale

slow

Roberto dies/is written out and is replaced with Milly after he gets satisfying character development

Bring back Vash's 60 billion. 6 million sounds SO WRONG

Wolfwood doesn't die until post season 1

Short timeskip after season 1 into season 2 to set the stage for the 'main' manga plot

If July happens and Knives has to regen after getting blasted/bested then a timeskip would make sense right

Hhhh

Feral plant Vash please we love the feathery baby limbed body horror and cg is the perfect medium for this scene to finally be animated

Elendira

Please

Don't fuck her up please

That's it

Okay actually that's a lie we also wanna see Tessla, Domina, and Chronica animated

But not the truck scene please

Realistically we know our wishlist probably isn't happening given we got a trailer with all the gung ho guns fighting already and what looks like Knives going all-out and they probably wouldn't have animated s2 stuff for a season 1 trailer but man we can hope right? Like maybe they'll just introduce them all before July and Knives is just throwing a temper tantrum like he often does 🥺 I mean he's still gotta make the plant collective and the ark so so so maybe he hasn't started yet despite physically stealing all the plants so far 😭 like if July is the s1 finale then there can still be a big flashy fight and everything, he will just regen after during the timeskip between s1 and s2 like he does in the manga 😭😭 <- is not coping great, clearly

Also, just for the record, it's been a couple months since I've last consumed the manga and the og anime, so forgive me for any inconsistencies or incorrect info, my memory isn't the greatest. I only have room for borderlands lore in here

Odds are, they're probably not following the manga's story, or changed it so significantly that none of this speculation actually matters. We will see!! After all these virus injector explodey things are totally new, so who knows where tf they're taking us next. We certainly don't. We're just having fun with it.

Just as an overall thing, this is us assuming season 1 is going to be 12 episodes. If it's 24, then maybe July will be the mid-season finale and 13+ will be after a timeskip.

[partyinthemysterymachine]

decided to reroll in let's go eevee and play as Rose (Mason-Sunderland) and it's been so much fun y'all. she definitely has a hypno named Lullaby and somewhere a jigglypuff named Purin bc this is my game and my cringe. she has some pokepasta pokemon. and a rhyhorn she named after Douglas that she rides on. and i love that for her a lot

that said she's a riot to think about in pokemon universe. nothing cohesive but yeah. as far as what about harry and james? oh; you know. they're.... ....... they're fine. just chillin :)

named the rival Alex (sorry to the one alex i do know i just name characters based on vibes 😔 he's cool tho) and since i never named her Actual Rival (jk her childhood friend but close enough) in the ACTUAL -adjacent universe, yeah sure we'll go with that for now. sorry @ original characters Lane and Grayson but literally Rose is more important than your nameless kid. Sorry

ummm. GOOMT updates: need meds so waiting on that but also i kinda ummmmmmmmm accccciiidentally maybe kinda sorta rewrote the next 3 chapters' outlines to change their subject timing so uhhhhh g. gimme a second to decide which one works the best and then spruce up what i've got. cuz uh. see i tried to make a tentative planning timeline like back in deccember and the issue is that i knew this might probably happen adn so at least i can say I Tried but yeah now i've got two other alternatives to think about before i settle bc it really does matter!!! hahaha. oh boy

at least i think i've almost got the ch1 rewrite done. we'll see. bc the issue is that i'm thinking about it. and New Lore may appear. Lore Relocation as well. Hmmm. curiouser. and curioser. and tbh i didn't really want to start with ch1 and work totally chronologically. ngl. so i might finsih the ch1 rewrite and hold off on it. finish some other ones. and then post. so ch1 isn't so fuckin JARRING of a writing styl change LOL from ch1 to ch2 like BAM oh shit what the fuck happened here y'know??? LOL. so yeah just. gimme a sec to work wiht that i've

i've literally beenw ithout my brain worky-right meds for a few days here as well as none of my medical speed and tbh. hands on hips. hhhh. yeah we'll go with that lol. boy you notivec a difference but it's ok. it's fine. it's fine i have an appt tmrw it's fine

anwyay so listen

rose, right. so about young rose

[charmspoint]

Getou for the character ask thing

Sorry anon I feel asleep before seeing this! But woo Geto now that's a blorbo I have a lot to say about.

First impression

Honestly my first impression of Suguru was very...confused? hvhvhj back then i still thought the villain we've been seeing so far was Suguru so I was just taking the backstory as 'okay we'll finally see what this guy is about'. And i have to give it to Gege, even though I didn't know these were two different people at the time, it kept bugging me 'hhhh this doesn't really seem to connect, would a character like this really do what he's doing right now?' Especially once I got to him wanting to kill the non-sorcerers to rid the world of curses like, him teaming up with curses just seemed like a leap. That being said my read of that part of jjk was very confused in an on itself...I got wrong information to read V0 after hidden inventory but before premature death so you can only guess at what a jumble my head was in. I needed to reread another time to straighten out what happened but since then i reread hidden inventory either completely or in bits so many damn times.

Impression now

Lifts Suguru up into the sky

This guy can fit so much love inside.

Let's be clear here, while Suguru is one of my fav jjk characters, he's never really managed the role of my favorite hero (Satoru) or villain (Kenjaku). I love him, but I've always loved characters who struggled in the world and still stubbornly did good and I've always specifically loved villains who did what they did out of some sort of twisted internal interest more than the ones with a sad backstory.

That being said I think Suguru is an endlessly fascinating and complex character and it's really neat that we get to see his internal struggles from that up close. He is such a horrible person but he's also a highly (and rigidly) moral person, the interaction is great. He also has a tendency to look down on others which he tries to mask as a kid but fully leans into as an adult, like who else would have thought to start a cult cmon. I've seen many hcs about roles reversed au where Satoru goes rouge and starts a cult but that's definitely a very Suguru thing to do, Satoru already grew up being worshipped why would he pull back into that in his breakaway stage, it would be like dragging behind a security blanket, THIS WILL NOT BE A SATORU REVIEW.

They are just so connected in my head if I think of one I think of the other.

My favorite thing about Suguru is that he developed his goals and ideals at 17 and they stayed VERY 17. Like, I remember what's it like being 17, I remember thinking in terms of black and whites and quick and bloody solutions to my problems. You usually age out of this, start seeing the grays of the world as you start to better understand how the world works. That everything is an interconnected system influenced by another system and its all well and good to say 'this should be different why the fuck isn't it different' but you won't change anything because the changes need to happen on the inside and not the surface.

Like, real life example. I go to college right and my college course group has stayed consistently pretty small, there is usually around 35 of us a year, I don't think we ever broke 40. My college is really good at preparing us for the scientific side of psychology as well as giving us a very wide net of knowledge so we can basically go everywhere after college. They do this by having a lot, a lot, of mandatory subjects. Like things like fucking MARKETING, i hated MARKETING, felt like i was selling my soul to the devil this is like the opposite of what i came to college to learn. So of course as subjects got more and more niche we all started bitching about how it would be nice if these subjects were you know, electable, so we can all choose 2-3 subjects in fields we really like and not bother with the rest. This would be 2-3 subjects as opposed to, and I'm not kidding here, 10-14 (and the highest) per semester. This would be great right? We would have a much lighter course work, we would be able to go deeper into elected subjects instead of just skimming the surface, we would be able to READ OTHER LITERATURE ASIDE FROM THE TEXTBOOK, one of my biggest qualms with my college is that we were often told to read on our own which would be great and good if the course load wasn't so fucking big and it was always a struggle between going to classes, doing class projects, studying and free time to read anything outside of it. So allowing us to specialize would be great right? The thing is, the way our educational system is set up, our professors don't get paid if they are teaching a class with less than 10 students. It's complete and utter bullshit but it is what it is. And with 35-38ish students a year, there was simply no way to safely specialize us while keeping our professors paid. Our professors wanted this change too but simply couldn't afford it. And there's the gray you know, our professors or our college wasn't the enemy but the way the stupid educational system was set up. Something that isn't really one person you can easily point to but a big mechanic that needs to be carefully pried apart to be changed. Gray and hard to attack, that's how adult life is.

And this is a thing Suguru not only never really grasped (he was 17, nobody expects of him then), but also I feel he prevented himself from grasping it. I think Gege said somewhere that Suguru had to repeat to himself he hates non-sorcerers, and I don't really take this as Suguru didn't actually hate non sorcerers, but more so he was actively preventing himself from growing a more complex moral system because he was already too far in to go back. It's not like he didn't hate non-sorcerers it's more like he couldn't afford to stop seeing them as the primary guilty party in this whole very complex mess. I'll talk about this a tad more in a sec, but I find it very fun that Suguru is a character with a strong moral compass entrapped by the said moral compass. He very much always has to be the one in the right and the one who knows best and it's so 17. People call Satoru immature but honestly he's so much more mature than Suguru just because he allowed himself to change and grow, while Suguru purposefully roadblocked his own mental growth. Changing ones mind on things is a sign of growth. It's a sign you are learning and becoming a better person. I held beliefs when i was younger that i condemn now simply because i learned better. Suguru didn't do this, He has killed people, many people, and there is no coming back from that the way there is from saying something stupid online when ur 15. He has cemented his path and his path is based on immature and very limited thinking. And so, to survive his own ideals he has to limit his own moral development and convince himself he is in the right. Because there is no longer going back, he's hardlocked himself into forever going forward.

Or well, forever going forward until someone stops him.

Favorite moment

"This is true love."

"Then this is justice."

Like oh boy we really telling on ourselves here aren't we.

Idea for a story

I've been toying with an idea for a curse! Suguru story for a bit now...honestly I just really enjoy writing curses, Satoru was so fun to write because of the way he moved but Suguru would be different.

Unpopular opinion

Remember when i said i will talk about it more, here it is. So back when the script for jjk 0 was out we got that alleyway scene and I don't remember exactly what was said but it was something that implied that Suguru had regrets which lead to people going 'suguru regretted everything' and then the backlash of 'suguru regretted' nothing. And by god there can be nuance here. Do I think Suguru specifically regretted killing all those people or did he not actually hate non-sorcerers? No, I think what he said we true, he still hated non-sorcerers, he still saw them as lesser and didn't specifically regret killing them at all. But i do think there was regret there. I think as he grew older he very much did start to develop his thinking more (therefor having to stunt it) and he very much did start to understand that he was only seeing parts of a problem and not the whole, that his actions had no meaning in the end and that he blocked himself from going back and doing things over and differently. Meaning and reason for things is so important to Suguru as a basis of his very understanding of himself. He's a moral person who exists with a higher meaning, he's doing the right thing, he's not evil, he's doing good, the other just can't see it yet because he's the one who has the best understanding of the situation, he knows things they don't and therefor is the only one with the full grasp on it (again, very 17). Suguru didn't regret his actions specifically, I don't think, he regretted because he understood he chose wrong, that what he did didn't actually change anything, that that slaughter and effort had no meaning. He didn't regret his actions but the futility of them. There's subtilties to both Suguru's and Satoru's emotions in that scene that I think fandom takes to extremes often. It's either Suguru regrets everything or regrets nothing, it's either Satoru feels immensely guilty and regrets killing Suguru or he's a dutiful robot about it. For me, Suguru doesn't regret his actions, he regrets that in the grand scheme of things they were useless in bringing about the world he wanted, just like Satoru doesn't regret killing Suguru but regrets not being able to stop him before he spiraled to the point of needing to be killed.

Favorite relationship

Satosugu next question

Favorite headcanon

I will always find that scene where Yaga is telling stsg about Tengen and Satoru, clan kid born and raised, is like wtf are u talking about while Suguru, only sorcerer in his family, is like dude u should know this. I just like the idea of Suguru arriving to school day 1, panicking he was so out of his depth and burying himself in the library for a month before he has a better handle on jujutsu history and customs than most clan born sorcerers. (Yes this was also because Satoru 100% zones out whatever isn't interesting to him but cmon, library hermit Suguru.)

ask game

[yume-fanfare]

I am a little confused on why Kazuki did not tell Fuuma to not be like his sister when he decided to crossdress and make his sister's dream come true by becoming an idol for her?

well kazuki's just a kid. if his best friend seems excited about doing x thing then of course he's going to follow too. he's not fuuma's therapist or anything and if his friend seems like he's somehow coping then yeah, he'll just support him through it, offer a shoulder to cry when needed and do what he can to help. but kazuki's not a confrontational person, it's just,,, not something he would do. and well, fuuma seems happy so what is there to do?

[museofvoid]

Just remembered when I woke up today that this year is the 20 year anniversary for Pirates of the Caribbean! I gotta make fanart holy shit. And I should do a cosplay! Fuck I gotta really appreciate potc this year

[crescent-stars]

Woojin really is out there carrying the first chorus the way he carries the whole music industry, huh

[elibeeline]

The nightmare scenario came true, she went wayyyyy too short

[cyro-starfire]

Cyro meeting Lemon Monster for the first time - Lemcy fic

⚠️WARNINGS FOR THIS FIC: OC X CANON, VIOLENCE, CUSSING, KISSING, CRINGE⚠️

Character colors

Blue - Boyfriend

Red - Girlfriend

Green - Pico

Pink - Cyro

Orange - Lemon Monster

The night was still young, the stars shine brightly throughout the night sky, the full moon also gave a brilliant light that made the night seem less dark. Pico, Girlfriend, Boyfriend, and Cyro were having as friend's night out, just the four of them. They generally used their time in the night to goof around and have fun, visiting parks, getting ice cream and just messing around with each other.

As the night grew they decided to sleep over at Pico's place for the night, Girlfriend told her parents about it so they wouldn't panic if Girlfriend didn't get home tonight. On their way to Pico's house Pico noticed the mansion that Girlfriend's parent's had owned, the same one where Bee and Gee met the spooky kids Skid and Pump.

"Ayo, Bee, ain't that the same house you met those kids in?" Pico asked Boyfriend. "Hrm?" Boyfriend looked over and noticed the house. "Oh yeah, it is, what about it?" "Well ain't it also the same house where you told me you like dissed a weird lemon headed monster thing?" Pico added. "Uhh...y-yeah...? Where are you going with this Pico?" Boyfriend asked slightly nervous of what Pico's intentions could've possibly been...

"Well, it's been a long ass time since I had a good scare, not even Cassandra's stupid ass could scare me, you said the guy was genuinely terrifying, I wanna be the judge of that shit!" Pico exclaimed. "DUDE! ARE YOU FUCKIN INSANE? THAT FUCKER WANTED TO EAT ME AND BAE!" Boyfriend responded with a shocked screech. "Dude come on, how bad can it be for me? Besides, Gee can't die remember?" Pico tried to remind Boyfriend. "But he was still fucking creepy, even for a dearest like me." Girlfriend admitted.

"For real?" Pico asked, astounded by Girlfriend of all people admitting that. "Yeah dude." "Well if that's the case, i think it's about time you introduced me to him!" Pico chuckled. "DUDE NO! ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY?! PLUS WHAT IF CYRO GETS HURT?!" Girlfriend states to Pico, obviously not happy that he would want to do something this reckless and life threatening. Pico looked at Cyro and felt bad that he almost forgot that they were there..."Well...you guys know I'll shoot up anything hostile." He responds bluntly. "Come on, it'll be worth it, i wanna meet this fucker" Girlfriend and Boyfriend looked at each other and then looked at Cyro for their input.

"o-o-oh uhm..." Cyro was taken aback by the situation being suddenly focused around them. "Do you think you'll be able to handle this shit Cy?" Boyfriend asks the alien in a gentle tone, as to not put more stress on Cy. "w-w-well i-i m-m-mean uh...i-i guess it sh-shouldn't b-be too b-bad if P-Pico is the o-one protecting us..." They replied quietly but not too quiet to where Bee and Gee couldn't hear. "You sure?" "I-I'm p-positive! P-Please don't w-worry about m-me too m-much!" Cyro reassures the two. Bee and Gee look at Cyro for a while and sighed. "Alright just...stay close to us alright?" Cyro nods in response.

Girlfriend finally responded to Pico "Okay, fine we'll go in again..." Pico cheered. "HELL YEAH! LES FUCKING GO!!!" Pico screamed out in joy as he immediately darted towards the mansion and wasted no time to get in, the other three followed but not as enthusiastic as Pico, they were more reluctant if anything, especially Girlfriend...

The inside of the mansion felt as dead and haunted as the first time Girlfriend and Boyfriend went inside it together for the first time. "I still hate looking at the inside of this hellscape babe..." Boyfriend shuddered. "Me too honey bun..." "Awe come on you guys are pussies!" Pico giggled. "EASY FOR YOU TO SAY MAN, YOU FUCKING KILLED A HUGE ASS ALIEN WHEN WE WERE IN FUCKING SCHOOL!" Boyfriend screeched at Pico in anger only making Pico laugh more. Cyro was shaking like a leaf, clinging tightly onto Girlfriend's red dress. "Y-You okay Cy?" Girlfriend asked, worried about the shivering alien. "i-i-i-i-i'm g-g-g-good..." Cyro whimpered silently.

"Okay this was obviously a bad idea, I'm pretty sure this place alone is gonna make Cy have a huge panic attack.." Boyfriend sighed but was cut off by Cyro. "N-N-NO! I-i-i-i-i'm okay, i-i promise...i-i-it's j-j-j-just c-c-cold here..." "You sure Cy?" Pico asked, concerned as well. "Y-Yeah...t-trust me g-guys i-i'm fine!" The alien tried their best to reassure the three, which only resulting in Pico, Bee and Gee sighing in unison, they couldn't just back out on this so quickly...right...?

After some time of exploring the mansion, it did take some time for Pico to get genuinely spooked by the place... "Wow...y'all weren't fuckin around..." He chuckled nervously. "This place is creepy as fuck...why do your parents even own this place to begin with Gee?" Girlfriend shrugged "I don't know man, sometimes they don't even make sense to me..." She responds. "Wait, so you admit your scared then?" Boyfriend asks with a slight giggle.

"WH-WHAT?! N-NO?! I AIN'T FUCKIN SCARED BEE!!" "Ya sure Pico?" Boyfriend giggled even more. "Your sure acting like your scared!" "THERE'S A FUCKIN DIFFERENCE WITH BEING SCARED AND BEING CREEPED OUT YOU FUCK NUT, GET THAT THROUGH YOUR THICK ASS HEAD!" "Okay but your stuttering, your clearly pissing yourself dude." "NO I FUCKIN AIN'T!" "Yeah you are!" "SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!" Pico screamed. And thus, an argument began with the two boys, Girlfriend sighed. Some things never really do change, do they? Cyro looked away from the arguing boys only to be met with an odd looking shadow in the distance. "h-h-h-huh?"

"g-g-guys...?" Cyro tried to get everyone's attention but they couldn't be heard over Boyfriend and Pico so they had to try again "G-Guys?" Still not being heard over, so Cyro took a deep breath and reluctantly scream to get their attention. "GUYS!" With them finally being heard all three of them turned their heads to look at the quivering alien. "Is something wrong Cy?"

"u-uh y-yeah, WHAT TH-THE FUCK IS THAT?!" The alien screeched in terror pointing at the lemon shaped shadow that was hiding behind a door. "What's wh- oh...oh no..." "B-B-Bee...?" "What the fu..." The shadow suddenly had a visible smile and finally spoke. "Well, well, well~ what do we have here~? A three course meal~? How thoughtful of you all~!" The voice was deep, soothing, and mesmerizing. The creature slowly opened the door and stepped out.

As seen through the shadow it had a yellow, lemon shaped head, it's eyes were huge with wide pupils within them, it's teeth were uncomfortably crooked, it's neck was a velvet red and the rest of it's body was a pitch, raven black, it had two fingers on each hand, and it had only two toes on each foot. The creature was very tall in compared to the four other beings within the room, it towered over all of them.

"It has been quite a long while since i have seen you two~! And i see you've brought that little schizophrenic ginger friend of yours~! And-" the monster paused to look at Cyro behind Girlfriend, still scared out of their mind. "Well now~! Who's this little friend of yours~? They look rather...appetizing~ in more ways then one if i must be so bold to say~!" He said, attempting to slowly approach Cy but was stopped by Girlfriend. "Don't go near them...O R E L S E . . ." She warned it with a growl, which only made the lemon headed monster roll its eyes in annoyance. "And you still don't know how to not be so RUDE..." The monster growled.

"Better not try jack shit bitch, i know how to use this thing." Pico aimed the gun towards the monster which only made it boom with laughter. "You think a puny little weapon like that scares me? How adorable~!" It chuckled before lunging at Girlfriend and attacked her which made Pico start firing bullets at the creature, and Cy ran as fast as they could into an empty hallway. Boyfriend stood still, he didn't wanna engage in the violence, he didn't sign up for this shit man...

After the monster and Girlfriend fought, monster while doing a number on Girlfriend decided that enough damage was done and went after Cyro. Pico and Boyfriend, instead of knowing Girlfriend can easily heal, and going after the monster and making sure he doesn't hurt them, went to Girlfriend to see if she was okay, Cyro was sobbing and whimpering while running, wanting to be home right now and not here.

"FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK!!! I KNEW THIS WAS A BAD IDEA WHY DID I TRY TO LOOK BRAVE FOR EVERYONE HHHH!!!!" The alien screamed internally and wished that they were just honest so that none of this would be happening right now, after some running they found themself in a dead end, and what was worse is that they could hear the monster's footsteps. "NONONONONONONONONONO PLEASE PLEASE OH PLEASE I DON'T WANNA DIE, WHY ME, WHY ME. WHY ME!!!" As much as they hated themself, but they were still terrified of dying, especially like this...

The monster got closer and closer until he was visible again which only heightened Cyro's anxiety, their heart was pounding through their chest and their breathing was rapid, they could barley think straight at all. "There you are my dear~!" The monster cooed. "p-p-p-please leave m-m-me alone..." They whimpered quietly. "Oh don't worry dear~! I won't kill you~! Will i possibly hurt you? Maybe, but then again..." He got closer to them and pinned them against the wall, he slowly put his two fingered claws against their face, and caressed their face gently.

"I would feel guilty if i caused any sort of harm to an adorable and beautiful creature such as yourself~!" It whispered in their ear making Cyro blush deeply and shudder they were so confused by this behavior. "You know, i normally don't have such feelings for prey...but you...your different..." The monster explained to Cyro. "wh-what d-do you m-mean...?" "I mean what i mean my sweet cherry cake~! Your seem like such a delicate creature~!" The monster slowly moved it's claws under Cyro's chin and began to rub the bottom of their chin gently. Cyro couldn't help but purr at the sensation.

The monster chuckled at Cyro's purring, they were so adorable. "Perhaps i won't eat you~ your so sweet, I'm afraid that if I eat you, I'll get a cavity~!" The monster joked. Cyro didn't respond, they only continued to purr at the monster rubbing their chin, until he took his claw away from their chin which only made them whine. "wh-why'd y-you st-" they were interrupted by the monster giving them a soft and gentle kiss on the lips, which surprised Cyro at first, but they slowly sunk into the kiss and kissed the monster back. There was some time before they broke away from the kiss, Cyro panted softly while looking at the creature

The monster chuckled. "While i would love to keep you, i fear that i have aggravated your friends enough, so unfortunately this will be goodbye for now, but i will be back soon, my little prey, until we meet again~!" The monster whispered to them beore giving them a kiss on the cheek and disappeared into the shadows again. Which only left Cyro in confusion but at the same time, they felt like they've fallen in love again.

After some time Pico, Boyfriend and Girlfriend found Cy, fortunately for them Cyro was okay, and the four of them darted out of the house as soon as fucking possible. Cyro never really forgot about that day ever since...

[hematomes]

Yoo I see you have had time to watch the livestream yourself so!! Bruh Khoi is so relatable he was literally just so funny throughout the entire stream 😭😭 And then add the dry with of Cory, I agree, such a good stream this time!!

Also,,, I’m going to get in trouble this patch lmao bc like I was gonna skip Itto, but then he looks so cool, so now I’m stuck with wanting to get Albedo and him rip, I’m 10 away from soft pity, and while I have not lost a 50/50 yet, you never know when I will aaaa I only have 40 wishes for now let’s hope that the next events are lucrative!! (Tho damn, this flower event gives 7x60 primos??? Das a lot) (bc also,,,,,, Itto’s weapon oh no 😬 the thing gives a whopping EIGHTY PERCENT CRIT DMG???? WHAT)

Tbh I haven’t fully processed the 2.3 big event yet but,,, this is gonna be wild

THAT I DID

khoi is hilarious i was so excited to see him in a livestream zkdnzk and yeah cory was a very nice surprise, with zach being a sweetheart as always too like 😭 they were amazing, def my favorite dynamic so far (+ max's chaotic description of itto's kit, ngl he nails that character they chose him perfectly pfrrr)

hhhh good luck on your future pulls <3 how i feel you for the weapon... tho it would only really work with itto (and noelle i believe thanks to the passive), i want it so much like dkskd even more than i wanted xiao's polearm AND IM A XIAO MAIN LIKE. 😩 sigh anyway i might... pour a bit of money on the weapon banner if i get itto and c6 gorou without spending it </3

im still wondering what's gonna happen and why/if it is a limited-time event, the 1st event with albedo did give some lore about dragonspine but it didn't feature albedo going ballistic and some chara potentially dying lmao but we'll see!!!! im extremely excited tbh

[nala-raines]

NSFW Alphabet with Adrian Raines

Pairing: Adrian Raines/Nala Raines (MC)

Rating: NSFW

Author's note: I’ve seen two of these, one disappeared, the other was a partial. So I wanted to give it a shot. This whole thing would happen after they get married and in a universe where both Lily and Jax are alive. And this is INSANELY long, and I’m both sorry and not sorry for that. At least it’s entertaining (I hope).

Adrian and I have been on vacation for three days, we needed time to be a normal-ish married couple, and not a Senator and a Senator’s wife. I woke up and realized that Adrian wasn’t next to me, but I quickly found a note saying, ‘Good morning Love. don’t worry, if I’m not back when you wake up, I’m just making My Beloved Wife breakfast in bed. I love you, Beautiful.’ I smile wide and say, “I love you, Honey.” This is the second time we’ve done this (and he’s been working in the Senate for nine months). When it’s just us, he likes making me food, and being nothing but my loving husband.

I pull the comforter closer to my chest, with every intention of going back to sleep, until Adrian gets back, but my phone starts going off. I turn and grab my phone, seeing a text from Lily. I unlocked my phone, and read her text, ‘I saw this and thought of you guys. Have fun.’ 

Confused, I click on the link ‘NSFW Alphabet’. “Lily! Why did you send me this?” 

“Why did Lily send you what?”

I turn and see Adrian holding a tray of my favorite breakfast foods, smiling warmly, and lovingly. “Good morning, Handsome.” I tell him, reflecting his smile.

“Good morning, Beautiful.” Adrian tells me, setting the tray on my end table and proceeding to kiss me sweetly. I feel myself calming down instantly, as he cups my cheek in one hand, and holds my waist with the other. He pulls back slightly, sits right next to me, “Now, what did Lily send you that made you so upset?” He asks me calmly.

“Lily… She… hhhh.” I sighed at the end, embarrassed at what she had sent, so I tilt my head down. Adrian and I have always been able to talk about sex openly, even when we first started dating. I was curious and he didn’t mind answering my questions, even though I didn’t want to do it yet. He just put his hand under my chin, gently lifting my head up, to look me in the eye.

He speaks softly, “You know you can tell me anything, ask me anything, I will never judge you. So, if you want to, please tell me what’s bothering you.” I smile at that, grab my phone, and email myself the link Lily had sent me. Use my tablet to pull up the link, and show him,

“She sent me a ‘sex survey’.” 

“Oh my...” He says both shocked and amused. He looks back at me and a smile appears on his face, “And you want to read through it, don’t you?” he asks me.

“Kind of. But what if someone finds out about it? Or it gets really weird, personal, or awkward? Or…” I start feeling a little weird.

“Nala…” He starts cupping my face. Looking me in the eye before continuing, “If you want to read through it, then we'll read through it. And besides, we don’t have to write the answers down, I can just tell you my answers, and if you don't want to answer when you don’t answer.” He places his back against the headboard and puts his arm around me.

“What if I don’t want to answer something?” I ask him looking up at him.

“Then don’t answer. that question” He tells me, kissing my forehead. “So, do you want to read through it?”

“Yeah, let’s do it.” I tell him. I give him a quick kiss, and snuggle into his side, as he grabs my tablet to start reading the questions.

A = Aftercare

“I like cuddles.” I tell him with an easy smile and a laugh.

“And I like cuddling You.” He told me, pulling me closer.

“You also ensure that I’m okay. Even if it’s nice and slow.” I added.

“Any kind of sex can be taxing. And I like taking care of you, whether it's a bath, food, water, a massage, anything you might need.” Adrian says.

“I know. It’s one of the many reasons why I love you, Mr. Raines.” I tell him.

“I love you, Mrs. Raines.”

B = Body Part

“Is this a trick question?” I ask both shocked and a little confused. I’m also unsure how to answer. “Is the answer obvious?”

“There are people that pick the obvious.” Adrian tells me, “But everyone has their preference.”

“Then I guess I’m part of the latter. I like your chest and shoulders.” I tell him, and he gives me an odd look. He’s about to ask why, but before he can say anything. “When I lean on your shoulders or your chest, I feel safe. When your chest is pressed to mine, and I wrap my arms around your shoulders, or grip your shoulders to help steady myself, I just feel like nothing will hurt me again. Like your mine, and I’m yours.” When I finish telling him this, he leans forward and gives me a sweet kiss. Before he tells me,

“I am yours, and you are mine. And I hope I can always make you feel safe and loved.” He says as he pulls me onto his lap, my back to his chest and kisses my cheek.

“What’s your favorite part of my body? My neck or butt?” I know He’ll probably say that from a physical standpoint I’m perfect for him. But I’ve noticed he would kiss my neck, and grab my butt. My boobs are big, but he usually doesn't outright grope them unless we're in the bedroom.

“Well your body is beautiful.” He says. I knew it. “I do like your neck. However my favorite part of your body would be your breasts.” As he says this, his hands go straight to my breasts, massaging them gently.

I sigh and lean into him, before I ask him, “I thought…” 

“They’re soft, warm, and close to your heart. Sometimes, when you're asleep, I will lay my head on your chest and listen to your heartbeat. I started doing that right after you came back.” He pauses for a second, I knew he was referring to me coming out of a coffin. “I hear your heartbeat when I’m laying next to you. But when I lay on your chest, it echoes.”

“That oddly just boosted my confidence. I love you.” I tell him.

“I love you too. What’s next?”

C = Cum

“You usually come inside me.” I say.

“Yes, I prefer marking you. I want people to know that you are mine.” He whispers that into my ear, right before kissing the spot right behind it.

“But you’ve cum stomach before, and some got on my chest before too.” I say confused.

“True, but I still prefer cumming inside of you.” 

“I prefer it when you cum inside me too. And I’m always yours.” I say kissing his neck.

D = Dirty Secret

“Mine is having sex in your office in Raines Corp. and your new office in D.C.” I remember those days. I wanted to try roleplay and he was up for it, vampire boss with his human assistant.

“Forgive me.” Uh-oh why is he saying that?

“Forgive you for what?” I ask him nervously.

“On the Sunday after we met, I couldn’t get you out of my head. I had a pretty vivid dream of us and I couldn’t shake how it felt. So, I called a hooker.”

I don’t know whether to laugh or be insanely mad. It happened before we were together, and I knew that he had slept with other women, but I wonder…

“Did you ask her to pretend to be me?” I ask, “I’m not going to hold this against you, but I want to know.”

“No, I didn’t ask her to pretend to be you.” He said, I can tell that he’s full of regret. “In fact, when I was with her last, I was thinking of no one but you. I sent her home early, and this is the first time I’ve thought of her since.” 

I stay quiet for a moment, unsure of how to answer. I don't feel mad or betrayed. In fact, it feels kinda nice to know that even after one day of knowing him, I was stuck in his head. It's actually a little funny, but before I can tell him it’s fine, he continues, “Please forgive me. I understand if you can’t right now, or ever. I never meant to disrespect you. I…”

I just shut him up with a kiss, a long, sweet, slow kiss. When I’m done I tell him, “I forgive you. It’s a little unsettling, but you said that you couldn’t shake me out of your head and you had only known me for a day. It makes me feel like you were mine from day one. I know that you’ve slept with other women before me, but I know you wouldn’t cheat on me.” I can see the relief in his eyes, as he begins to kiss the side of my face and neck. “Let’s do the next one.”

E = Experience

“You have a lot. I have none. That a good enough answer?”

“Yes. But you're the best woman I’ve ever been with.” He moves my hand to his heart and says, “I mean that. With all of my heart.”

I turn my head and kiss him. Adrian is the sweetest man I’ve ever met.

F = Favorite Position

“You go first, Adrian.” I look at him expectantly.

“Well it’s easy. Any position where I can see your face. That way I can kiss your face, neck, shoulders…”

“Breasts?” I added for him. We both laughed before he agreed with a nod. “I like being able to look at your face when we make love. And I kinda like it when I’m on your lap when we do it, too. But my favorite would be when you're on top though.” I tell him.

“I do like it when you’re on top, my love.” Adrian says with a mischievous, and slightly challenging grin. “I also like being on top of you, as well.”

“I’m glad that we can agree.”

G = Goofy

“We don’t really get goofy.” Adrian says.

“Not during sex, no. I may get a little goofy a little bit after, but not really during. Is that weird? How I can be a little goofy afterward.” He places kisses along the side of my neck and face. Before whispering in my ear,

“No. You’re adorable when you're being goofy.”

H = Hair

“I think I’m pretty good at staying groomed, but I’m not 100% sure.” I look at him to make sure and he gives a reassuring smile.

“Yes, you are good at grooming yourself.” He tells me, then kisses my cheek.

“You're good at grooming yourself too.” 

“I’ve always trimmed a little bit. It honestly felt a little weird to trim my face and if I didn’t trim…” He refers to his downstairs, “it honestly felt a little uncomfortable if I waited too long.”

“That’s actually how I started grooming. It wasn’t much, but it made me feel better.”

I = Intimacy

“No one else matters, nothing else exists, I just want to make you feel amazing.” Adrian tells me. His voice is filled with love, adoration, and a vulnerability he shows more often than people think.

“I feel that way too. I feel like everything we’ve ever faced, every emotional scar or trauma, never happened. That it's just you and me, that nothing will hurt me. You make me feel loved and cherished everyday I’m with you. I love you, Adrian Raines, so much.” 

He presses his forehead to mine, “I love you too, Nala Raines, so much I’d do anything and everything you ask of me.” He gives me a soft, sweet kiss, I turn my body so I can face him. And when I do he moves his hands to cup my face, we stay like this for who knows how long, but we eventually get back to the survey.

J = Jack Off (masturbation)

“I never knew how and even if I did I don’t think I would. You?”

“I never really felt the need to. If I ever felt like I wanted to, I would go find someone to be with. And then I met you, and after that one day, I knew I didn’t want anyone else. So, either ‘jacking off’ didn’t seem like a good option, or I met you and wanted nothing to do with pleasuring myself and didn’t want to be with  anyone else, other than you.”

“Aw. That sounds strangely sweet to me. And we’re only half way through this thing.”

“Well then. Let’s keep going.” With a quick kiss we move on.

K = Kink

“Would your blood count?” Adrian asks me.

“Yes, blood is a kink.” 

“Then your blood.” We both laugh. I pause for a moment, I think I have two, but I’m not sure Adrian would be cool with the second.

“I like when you take control. I know that you would never hurt me and I kinda like being the prey to your predator.” I say, trying to be seductive. Leaning my head back to whisper that in his ear.

“I can’t lie to you, I like it too.” He says kissing the spot right behind my ear. “Anything else I should know, Nala? Anything else you might be interested in?” He asks me.

I really don’t know if I should tell him this. I mentioned it before, just out of curiosity, he said it wasn’t his thing. Maybe I’ll tell him in a decade or two. “Nothing that can’t wait.” Adrian gives me a look, that ‘I know that you're hiding something’ look. 

“Nala, you know I’m not going to judge you. Please tell me.”

“Well… there are some aspects of …” I really don’t want him to think about me differently.

“It's okay Nala.” He kisses the side of my face.

Yeah, saying it slow isn’t working, so … I’m just gonna spit it out. “Some aspects of BDSM that I kinda want to try.” I turn to look at his face, nervous to see what his reaction will be.

“What about it interests you?” He doesn’t seem mad, just curious.

“Honestly… sensation play, being blindfolded, maybe other forms of roleplay, and I guess bondage. We don’t have to try any of that. It just sounded interesting to me.”

“We can try any of those if you want.” He says with a glint of interest in his eyes.

“What… I thought you weren’t interested in any of that.”

“I’m not going to use a whip and cover you in welts, but if you want to try something involving our sex life, then I’m willing to try it. As long as you're okay with it, and you trust me to try with you, then we’ll try it.” Adrian says this, his voice filled with understanding and love.

“Of course I trust you. Thanks for being so understanding.”

“Of course. Why don’t we finish this and then we’ll talk about what you’re comfortable with and what you would want to roleplay.” he finishes with a kiss on my cheek and reads the next thing,

L = Location

“A bedroom that we share. What can I say it's more private that way.” I tell him.

“I agree, but I did have fun in my office.”

“Fair point. And don’t you mean ‘offices’? We’ve had fun in both of your offices.”

M = Motivation

“Do you remember the day we first met? At your interview?” He asks me.

“It’s the day I first met you, of course I remember it.”

“Well, when I looked into your eyes and shook your hand. I really wanted to tell Nicole to leave, pin you to that table and have my way with you.” I blush at that, before saying.

“To be honest, I would’ve made out with you, but I only sleep with men that are my husband.”

“I guess I’m lucky.”

“I am too.”

N = NO

“Hurting you. And there is absolutely NO WAY I’m sharing you.”

“Sharing is one of my ‘nos’ too.”

“Hurting you is my nightmare.” We both remember Rheya’s mind control. I don’t think he’ll ever truly forgive himself for that. Even though I know that wasn’t him.

“Can you be more specific for me, babe?”

He just looks at me and says “What?”

“Feeding hurts a little bit, then the pain fades and is replaced with pleasure. And when we had sex for the first time it hurt a bit, and again it was replaced with pleasure.” I tell him, trying to soothe his fear. “I will never blame you for what Rheya made you do. I know I was jumpy around for a few days, but I never blamed you. I love you, Adrian.”

“I love you. But you will tell me if it ever hurts too much.” He says, and I can tell that he is hearing and accepting my words.

“Of course dear.” I say lovingly as we turn our attention to the survey.

O = Oral

“I do love the way you taste.” Adrian says, his voice sounding slightly deeper than normal.

“You’re really good at it too.” I haven’t felt comfortable enough to try performing oral sex on Adrian. I want to but I’m not entirely sure what to do. I feel bad, he makes me feel amazing and I want him to feel amazing too. Heck I just started using my hand on him a couple months ago.

“You know that I’m content with our sex life, right? That I don't care what we do as long as you're comfortable and enjoying yourself?” He says, pulling me closer to his chest. Sometimes I would swear that he’s a psychic.

“Yeah, I just… I’m still new at this. And I feel like I’m not doing everything I can to satisfy you.” I think I made him at the very least agitated.

“I didn’t marry you to have sex with you, My Love. I married you so we can spend the rest of our lives together, if that was what you wanted to. And so long as you are satisfied then I am too.” His voice is calm, but filled with love and assurance.

“I know and I’m sorry. I want to try using my mouth, I’m just nervous.”

“You don’t need to apologize. And you can try it when you feel ready, I’m in no hurry.” He once again kisses my temple, as I get ready to make a joke that would make Lily proud and my sister be more ashamed of me than she already is.

“Speaking of hurrying.”

P = Pace

“It varies,” I answer confidently, “you can be a bit demanding when we’re rough, but I love it when you're gentle.”

“You deserve all of the gentleness, love, and tenderness in the world.” Adrian begins to kiss my neck and shoulder, while his hands gently massages my breast. “When I make love to you, I want you to feel how much I love you.” My head is against his shoulder as I gaze at his face, I see a rare sly grin appear, as hands grip my breast a little hard. It had shocked me so I jumped a little before he continued, “Then I have days where all I want to do is take your breath away and hear you scream.”

“I like it when you're hard and fast sometimes. But I also like it when you’re slow and gentle.”

“I like it slow and gentle too, My Love.” He then places a line of kisses starting behind my ear, down my neck and ending on my shoulder.

“Mmmm… babe… oh think we can finish this and then do that?”

“Of course, what’s next?”

Q = Quickie

“I can’t say I’m a fan.” Adrian says.

“May I ask why?”

“I would much rather take my time with you, make sure that you’re fully satisfied no matter long or how many rounds it takes. But if you want to try it, I’m willing.”

“I’m not sure about that just yet, but if I change my mind I’ll let you know.” I pause for a second before adding, “But I don’t think I’ll ever want to risk someone, other than you, seeing my breasts or…” I gesture to my pussy.

“You do realize that I would step in front of you so on one would see anything private?” 

“I also don’t like the thought of other people seeing certain parts of you either.”

“You know that it 1) wouldn’t be the first time that has happened and 2) I would rather photos of me be on the front page than you.”

“Somehow that is both sweet and irritating.”

R = Risk

“I think I answered that a minute ago.” I say.

“Yes you did.”

“But for the sake of answering the question, it’s the ‘getting caught’ bit that bothers me. I don’t want other people seeing my breast, pussy, and/or butt. Same goes with your dick and butt.”

“And as I said before, the only reason anyone would see my dick and/or butt would be to make sure no one gets to see this site,” He runs his hands from my neck, down my chest, cupping my breasts before continuing down until he reaches my inner thighs, before he continues, “other than me.” His voice got deeper as he said those last three words. 

“Do you need a break from this? We don’t have anything going on really…” My breathing is a little fast and heavy now and I’m not gonna lie, I kinda want to hear him breathless and saying my name like it's the only word he knows.

“You have no idea how tempting that offer is.” His voice is still dark, deep, and low. His lips are right by my ear. “But let’s finish this survey first. I want to see what else you may want to try.”

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for? How long do they last?)

“I can last as long as you want.” Adrian says with a smile.

“True. I think I can go about 4-5 rounds straight and after that I need food and a nap.” We share a laugh. “Even though, sometimes, I get a little sore, it's worth being intimate with you. Besides I’m trying to build up my endurance, so one day,” I turn to look him in the eye, “I can last just as long as you.”

“One day you will.” I give him a kiss and move on to the next question.

T = Toy(s)

“None. You?” I answer.

“No. But I may be investing in some silk restraints soon.” Adrian says with a smile.

“Oh… right.” I say sheepishly, with a blush creeping up my face, “You do know that belts or your neck ties would work too, right?”

“I know that my belts or ties could hold you, but I also know that if you squirm too much you could get a friction burn. And besides I want to make sure that you’re comfortable with anything we do, and silk is softer and more comfortable than cotton or leather for that matter.” He says, as he places his hand above my own, gently rubbing my knuckles.

“Is my comfort the main thing that you think about? Because that has come up a lot today?” I ask laughing.

“Yes, your comfort is one of my main thoughts. You are my world. I want you to feel as comfortable as possible. I know that you're going to feel uncomfortable at times and there’s nothing I can do about that, but I will do as much as I can to help you feel comfortable.” He says sweetly.

“Adrian Raines, I love you.”

“Nala Raines, I love you.”

U = Unfair

“You may tease me a little bit, but I wouldn’t say it’s ‘unfair’.”

“I try not to be.” Adrian responds chuckling.

“But other than foreplay, why bother teasing me? Or is that just your thing?” I ask, “I like the foreplay, but I am curious. You don’t have to answer.”

“You forget that one of my favorite things about you is your curiosity. And foreplay or ‘teasing’ helps make sure that women are…” He pauses for a moment, “ready for sex itself.”

“Oh… because men’s dicks would stretch a woman’s…” He nods, not needing me to finish.

“You know that you can ask me any question you have about sex and I will answer it the best I can?”

“Yeah I know.” I sigh.

He kisses the side of my face, “What’s next?”

V = Volume

“You talk a lot and I think it’s really sexy. And  I think I’ve only heard you scream… twice.” I tell him.

“I could help it those days.” Adrian says before a sly smile appears on his face. “You my dear, you are a screamer.” He says chuckling a bit.

“I know, you’re right.” Adrian is right. I try to be quiet, but I usually wind up screaming so loud that I worry about making Adrian’s ears bleed. I have always had a loud high pitch scream. “I’m sorry that I’m so loud.”

“Those are words husband’s rarely hear, if at all. Don’t worry I’m not going to let it go to your head. And I love hearing you scream.” He pauses thinking for a moment, “At least when I know it’s because I’m pleasuring you.”

“And if I make your ears bleed, or pop your ear drums.”

“I made you feel good. It would be worth it.”

W = Wildcard

“I don’t think I have one.” He says

I sigh before saying, “I do.”

“What is it?”

“I kinda like it when you put your hand on my throat.”

He only did that once. He had a rough day at the Senate, I remember how he was like this after some council meetings, and yet this was worse. I had surprised him in D.C. that day, and when we went to the bedroom, I asked him to ‘not hold back’, after a little convincing and a promise, he let go alright. He had put his hand on my throat, I could breath fine (well fine-ish), it was just an act of possession. But I enjoyed it.

“Oh you did, did you?” Adrian says, moving his hand to my throat to move my head back, so he can look me in the eye.

“Yes, again one of those things where I feel like I’m yours. And before you even think it, I know that Rheya is gone. She was the one that made you hurt me. I’m not afraid of your touch. I never have been, and I never will be.” He just looks at me, rubbing the side of my neck gently, before he says,

“Then I will take this to heart, Nala. I trust you.”

“I trust you too.”

X = X-ray (How big is it)

“I actually did that.” He said.

“Wait, what? When?” I know I’m probably not going to like the answer, but I have to know.

“Do you really want to know?” He asks.

“Yes. I know that I may not like the reasons behind it, but this feels like a story that I can’t pass up.”

“Very well. It was actually at a Dark Solstice, I think it was 1999. I got drunk with the Baron and Lester.”

“Ha! Seriously? I saw you guys that the Dark Solstice a few years ago, you guys weren’t that chummy. Unless that’s the reason…” I stop and give Adrian a shocked-questioning look.

“No, the next day they were so hung-over that they didn’t remember a thing, but Lester did remember that we did something that I beat him at. He just didn’t remember what.” He says laughing.

“Wait, was that the grudge he held against you?” Adrian answered with a nod, smiling. “And he didn’t know what you beat him at? He really didn’t remember?”

“Yes.”

“Wow. Question: why did you decide to get drunk with Lester and the Baron?” I ask.

“Some vampires thought that the world would end when Y2K hit. Lester and Baron decided to use that as an excuse to drink all of the alcohol they could. I didn’t care, but I figured why not the world is not going to end in a few weeks, and I thought that being drunk around them might make them more tolerable. And I was right.”

“Did the Baron remember what you guys did?” I ask.

“No, he walked up to me and asked if I knew what all happened the night before. I didn’t feel like going into it, so I told him that I had no clue what had happened.”

“One more question.” Adrian gave me an encouraging look and a nod, before I continued, “How big? I have no complaints, but you know something about yourself that directly affects me. And as your wife, I feel like I should know.”

“Well, it’s hard to argue your logic. And please keep in mind that I wasn’t hard at the time. But I measured in at about 8.5-9 inches.” My jaw dropped.

“And I take all of you?!”

“Expertly, I’d say.”

“Dang. Let’s do the next one.” I’m in a little bit of shock, I’m glad he’s mine.

Y = Yearning

“Let’s see you’re my first thought in the morning, my last thought at night, and you have 97% of my thoughts in between.” Adrian says, before he kisses my ear. I know him and when we’re done with this survey, we’ll talk a little bit, and then we won’t leave the bed for most of the day.

“Unless you're busy.” I reminded him, “You have forgotten to text and call me a few times, even before you were a Senator.”

“Even when I have a million things to do, you are the only thing I want. I even get clear images of you in my arms, I even hear your moans like you are right in front of me. Never forget that I always have, and forever will want no one, but you.” I think he knows what this kind of talk does to me.

“Mmmm. I’ve done the same thing with you. I always want you.” I tell him, right now I just want to say forget the survey, but we only have one left.

Z = ZZZ (Who falls asleep first?)

“Guilty.” I say,

“Yes, but it only means that I get to marvel at the beauty that is my wife.”

“So what, I’m your Sleep Beauty?”

“Yes you are.” Adrian whispers in my ear, his voice is low. He then kisses my neck and I feel the prick of his fangs. “Now I’m going to reheat your breakfast.” He says as he gently gets out of behind me and picks up the tray of food that I had forgotten about.

“Sorry about that babe. But why are your fangs still out?”

“It’s alright. And my fangs are out, because when I get back, I hope to see you in less clothes.” He tells me, giving me a heated look. He gets to the doorway, and then he turns back to me and asks, “Would you like to try sensation play, when I get back? Or would you prefer to eat quickly and I become a full on predator, that’s soul purpose is to ravage you?”

I look at the tray and see that there is maple syrup, chocolate syrup, grapes, strawberries, I’m pretty sure that’s cherry jam, and a few other things. Everyday I find a new reason to love this man, “The former, if that’s alright.”

“Of course it is.”

“We’ll take it slow?”

“Just like our wedding night.”

“You know I’m gonna want a shower when we’re done right?”

“I know.” He turns around to leave, but I stop him one more time.

“I love you.” He turns back to me, but before he responds he sees that I had stood up and taken off my clothes. I see that he’s getting hard.

“I love you too.” He says. I’m excited to try something new, especially because I’m trying it with him.