#hhhhhgggggggg I feel like I can never quite get my words about them right

[sunnnfish]

SOMETHING I FORGOT ABOUT TBHK CHAPTER 100.

Mitsuba. “You’d be sorry to see me go, the same way you would for anybody.” THERES. There’s things here. Things that comment on both of their states of mind.

Mitsuba believes he isn’t special to kou. He thinks kou is this self sacrificial idiot who’d go around dying for anybody. But like. Correct me if I’m wrong but I don’t remember him crying like this before. Out of grief and frustration and loneliness. Not when he learned nene was going to die. Not when his brother was split in front of him. He’s only ever cried over mitsuba. Mitsuba is different to him.

AND ITS LIKE. They both believe they aren’t special to each other. But they want to be. Kou wants to be needed by mitsuba. Mitsuba wants kou to be his end. Like. Urgh. Do you get it.

The same way you would for anybody. Holding his hand and smiling because he knows kou is kind beyond his capabilities. And kou looks downright horrified that mitsuba thinks like that. That mitsuba thinks this isn’t different. But the thing is kou probably would do things like this for anybody. That’s true because he is far too kind beyond his capabilities. He makes promises he can’t keep, burns his hands for some semblance of the power to protect. But mitsuba is different and I can’t pin down the words to say exactly why but kou has become uniquely attached to him. He knows things about mitsuba that no one else does. And he consistently chooses to help mitsuba, specifically. Please understand.