#honestly i was hot and tired from walking and dont have the emotional stability and did give him the what for | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

senxitive · 1 year

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I want to take this moment to acknowledge that I feel confident in my decision. Before it slips away and I start back with the "what ifs." I made the right decision, not only for myself, but the other people it would have impacted and things must get better from here. The time for action was months and months ago, all that is left is trauma and pain now. And I am right to move on. I can't let this affect me any longer.

#he many times pinned me for expecting the worst...but i knew the outcome from the moment it started #yes some of it was me catastrophizing but it was also that i was attuned with the reality of the situation from the get go #we officially ended it for the second time..and hopefully the last...just this last weekend #he asked me what i wanted in reality #i told him at this time...all i wish is that i were easier to be friends (feels impossible...im so damn wounded)#asked him what his was then #and he said friends 'at a minimum'#then walked it back and said wishes best friends #honestly i was hot and tired from walking and dont have the emotional stability and did give him the what for #i said you cant say shit like that motherfucker #lmao i cant stand myself but thats how i felt and i had no fucks to give at that moment #and reminded him that he needs to watch how he says things..to me....to anyone #explained that what is SOUNDED like he was implying that at minimum he wishes we were friends but hed like *more than friends*#he then clarified he would like to be with me but doesnt know how and cant in the way i want it to be #makes no fuckin sense actually and im done trying to understand it #'in the way i want' ?????? you mean a normal fucking relationship? lol idek #very done #hopefully i can ride the no fucks train until all the heartbreak has dissolved into a closed healed-ish wound #personal #delete later

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