#how much time did i spend researching space and how tiny and irrelevant we are

[imabiscuitinthousandworlds]

Getting really into TMA is so funny because I feel like I've just been desensitised to everything. Was scrolling through the Fears to figure out which would probably claim me and like... disturbing but not all that scary, never really scared me too much, got over that, I just picked up a spider with my bare hands it's fine, that's been a constant since I was a kid and first heard about climate change, the scariest thing about this one is the fact that I relate too much and am still not scared, just feeling kinda understood, this one used to terrify me but by now it's morphed into a sort of comfort. I mean of course I still get afraid. But like. Not really like that I don't think. I'm just tired and stressed and not in a crushing Buried kind of way.

[worldnewsinpictures]

Do it. Fuck you. Fuck you. You useless piece of shit. You absolute waste of space and air. You uneducated, ignorant, idiotic dumb swine, youre an absolute embarrassment to humanity and all life as a whole. The magnitude of your failure just now is so indescribably massive that one hundred years into the future your name will be used as moniker of evil for heretics. Even if all of humanity put together their collective intelligence there is no conceivable way they could have thought up a way to fuck up on the unimaginable scale you just did. When Jesus died for our sins, he must not have seen the sacrilegious act we just witnessed you performing, because if he did he would have forsaken humanity long ago so that your birth may have never become reality. After you die, your skeleton will be displayed in a museum after being scientifically researched so that all future generations may learn not to generate your bone structure, because every tiny detail anyone may have in common with you degrades them to a useless piece of trash and a burden to society. No wonder your father questioned whether or not your were truly his son, for you'd have to not be a waste of carbon matter for anyone to love you like a family member. Your birth made it so that mankind is worse of in every way you can possibly imagine, and you have made it so that society can never really recover into a state of organization. Everything has forever fallen into a bewildering chaos, through which unrecognizable core, you can only find misfortune. I would say the apocalypse is upon us but this is merely the closest word humans have for the sheer scale of horror that is now reality. You have forever condemned everyone you love and know into an eternal state of suffering, worse than any human concept of hell. You are such an unholy being, that if you step within a one hundred foot radius of a holy place or a place that has ever been deemed important by anyone, your distorted sac religious soul will ruin whatever meaning it ever had beyond repair. You are an idiotic, shiteating, dumbass ape and no one has ever loved you. Rhodes Island would have been better off if you'd never joined us. You are a lying, backstabbing, cowardly useless piece of shit and I hate you with every single part of my being. Even this worlds finest writers and poets from throughout the ages could never hope to accurately describe the scale on which you just fucked up, and how incredibly idiotic you are. Anyone that believes in any religion out there should now realize that they have been wrong this entire time, for if divine beings were real, they would never have allowed a being such as you to stain the earth and this universe. In the future there will be horror stories made about you, with the scariest part of them being that the reader has to realize that such an indescribable monster actually exists, and that the horrific events from the movie have actually taken place in the same world that they live in right now. You are the absolute embodiment of everything that has ever been wrong on this earth, yet you manage to make it so that that is only a small part of the evil that is your being. Never in the history of mankind has there been anyone that could have predicted such an eldrich abomination, but here you are. Its hard to believe that I am seeing such an incredible failure with my own eyes, but here I am, so unfortunately I cannot deny your existence. Even if I did my very best, my vocabulary is not able to describe the sheer magnitude of the idiotic mistake that is you. Even if time travel some day will be invented, there still would not be a single soul willing to go back in time to before this moment to fix history, because having to witness such incredible horrors if they failed would have to many mental and physical drawbacks that not even the bravest soul in history would be willing to risk it. I cannot imagine the pure dread your mother must have felt when she had to carry a baby for nine months and then giving birth to such a wretched monster as you. Not a single word of the incoherent, illogical rambling you may be wanting to do to defend yourself or apologize would ever be able to make up for what you just did. The countries of the world would have wanted to make laws preventing such a terrible event like this from ever happening again, but sadly this is not possible since your horrific actions just now have shattered every form of order this world once had, making concepts such as laws irrelevant. Right from the moment I first set my eyes on you I knew you were an absolute abomination of everything that is wrong with humanity. I was hoping I would have been able to prevent your evil from being released upon this world by tagging along and keeping my eye on you, but it is clear to me now that not even the greatest efforts would have been able to prevent a terrible event in this scale from occurring. You are the worst human being, or even just being in general, that I have ever had the misfortune of witnessing. Events like the infected plague apparently only happened with the goal of teaching humanity to survive such a horrible event as the one you just created, but not even mankinds greatest trials were able to even slightly prepare anyone for the insufferable evil you have just created. If you ever had them, your children would be preemptively killed to protect this universe from the possibility of anyone in your bloodline being even half as bad as you are, except you will never be able to have children, because not a single human being will ever want to come within a hundred mile radius of you and anything you have ever touched. You are a colossal disappointment not only to your parents, but to your ancestors and entire bloodline. The disgusting mistake that you have just made is so incredibly terrible that everyone who would ever be to hear about it would spontaneously feel an indescribable mixture of immense anger, fear and anxiety that emotionally and physically they would never truly be the same ever again. The sheer scale of your mistake, if ever to be materialized, would not only surpass the size of the world, but it would reach far beyond the edges of the known, and almost certainly the unknown universe. I could sit here and write paragraphs, nay, books describing your immense failure, yet even if I were to dedicate my life to describing the reality of what has just gone down here, and I would spend every moment of it until my heart stops beating working as hard and efficiently as possible, yet there is not even a snowballs chance in hell that I would be able to come close to transcribing the absolute shitshow you have just released upon the world. You are an irresponsible, idiotic, disgusting, unloved, horrible excuse for a living being whos soul contains less humanity than every ginger in history combined. The absolute disgust I feel when thinking about anything that has even a slight resemblance to anything that might have to do with you and your unholy actions is so incredibly great that when I am honest about it I think that even I do not posses a consciousness great enough to comprehend my own feelings about it. When people of Columbia fought to break free from Lungmen, countless soldiers fought and lost their lives in favor of a chance at a better future for their children, they did not give their lives to have you fuck the world up beyond repair to the degree that you are doing right now. Honestly, even when technology advances and studies on the subject become more and more accurate, I do not think humanity will ever truly be able to understand what your failure actually means for the universe. My hate for you and everything you stand for is so much deeper than the depths of Shambala that you could probably take the entire Lungmen population down there and back up around twenty million times before you would have sunk to the end of my hate, and honestly, I do not want to exaggerate, but I think that that insult was low balling it such a massive amount that all mountains in this world combined would not be able to stack up to this imprecise judgement in light of the fact that when being honest, my hate is almost certainly bottomless. There is no one in this world that has ever loved you, and especially after what you just did, no one will ever love you in the future either. There is no hope that your idiotic behavior and especially your crooked soul will ever change for the better, and in fact quite the opposite might be true. By making the mistake that you just did, you have shown me that you are so incredibly hopeless that you will only devolve into a more idiotic and wretched creature than you already are. The only possible way in which your future would be brighter than the black hole your existence currently is would exclusively be because there is absolutely no conceivable way that you would even be able to sink lower than the pathetic place your current failure has put you in.... Got an opinion about this? See what others are saying.... See MORE -> https://worldnewsinpictures.com/do-it #FuckFuck #FuckFuckYou #YouThe #YouTheEven #Jesus #JesusAfter #JesusAfterYour #YouYou #YouYouYou #Island #IslandYou #IslandYouEven #YouNever #YouNeverIts #EvenNot #EvenNotThe #YouEvents #YouEventsYou #TheYou #TheYouThe #Columbia #ColumbiaLungmen #ColumbiaLungmenHonestly #Lungmen #LungmenThere #LungmenThereThere #GotSee #GotSeeSee #useless #absolute

[brigdh]

Reading Saturday

Nemesis Games by James S.A. Corey. Book 6 of The Expanse series. "I made my name with the story on the Behemoth. Aliens and wormhole gates and a protomolecule ghost that only talked to the most famous person in the solar system. I don't think my follow-up to that can be "Humans Still Shitty to Each Other". Lacks panache." That's Monica Stuart, a journalist looking for her next story, but it makes a fairly good summary of Nemesis Games as well – though I'd disagree about it lacking panache. After five books of zombie viruses and a vast galaxy of empty planets for the taking and physics-defying abandoned security systems, Nemesis Games features pretty much no alien content at all. Instead we have humanity reacting to these events, mostly in negative ways that feature them being, well, shitty to each other. The biggest reaction comes from the Belters, millions of humans born and raised in no-gravity or low-gravity. Those conditions have led to extremely low bone-mass (among other physical adaptations), which means all those new planets out there for the taking? The Belters won't be going to them, at least not without months or years of expensive medical therapy that's out of reach for most of them. They can see the future coming, and it's going to abandon them to poverty and irrelevance. They lash out with terrorist attacks on a scale grander than any before, as though enough violence will force humanity back to where it was before the first encounter with the alien protomolecule. That might be an impossible goal, but a hell of a lot of people are going to die anyway. Meanwhile, the spaceship Rocinante is in need of repairs, which means our four main characters are out of action for a few months. They take this opportunity to split up and visit family and old friends – Amos to Earth, Alex to Mars, Naomi to the Belt, and Jim stays with the ship at the repair station. Having separate plotlines means that each one gets their own POV, and you guys, I was so excited! I've been waiting to hear Naomi or Alex's voice since Book One, and this does not disappoint. Amos's narration was particularly well-written; he's a straight-up sociopath (though one who tries to do good nonetheless) and struggles to recognize emotions either in himself or in others, often defaulting to describing social situations as a set of maneuvers toward a desired outcome. It lends his POV a curiously flat tone, but one that is really interesting to read. The four crew members are still separated when the terrorist attacks begin, and most of the emotion in the book comes from them trying to desperately make their way back to one another. Each one thinks of the others as family, as home – this is such an absolute fantastic series for those Chosen Family feels – especially Jim, and who would have thought the boring action hero of Book One could become such an adorable softie? He spends a significant portion of this book being sad that no one will do the space-equivalent of texting him back, and I love him so much. Holden could sit at a tiny table skimming the latest news on his hand terminal, reading messages, and finally check out all the books he’d downloaded over the last six years. The bar served the same food as the restaurant out front, and while it was not something anyone from Earth would have mistaken for Italian, it was edible. The cocktails were mediocre and cheap. It might almost have been tolerable if Naomi hadn’t seemingly fallen out of the universe. Alex sent regular updates about where he was and what he was up to. Amos had his terminal automatically send a message letting Holden know his flight had landed on Luna, and then New York. From Naomi, nothing. She still existed, or at least her hand terminal did. The messages he sent arrived somewhere. He never got a failed connection from the network. But the successfully received message was his only reply. After a couple weeks of his new bad Italian food and cheap cocktails routine, his terminal finally rang with an incoming voice request. He knew it couldn’t be from Naomi. The light lag made a live connection unworkable for any two people not living on the same station. But he still pulled the terminal out of his pocket so fast that he fumbled it across the room. Each character gets to star in a very different genre within this one book: Jim himself is in a political thriller, trying to find the mole hidden in the security forces; Amos is making his way through a post-apocalyptic landscape; Naomi is in a prison-break movie; and Alex gets at least two extremely cool car chases (well, spaceship chases) between being a detective following the paper trail. All of them are great, but I think my favorite is Naomi's, which is an incredible depiction of the harm and suffocation of emotional abuse (gaslighting in particular) and the depression and learned helplessness that can result, especially when everyone around you sees nothing wrong. We get a lot more about her long-awaited backstory, as well as Amos's, and there are reappearances of a lot of my favorite secondary characters: Martian marine Bobbie, failed murderer Clarissa Mao, foul-mouthed politician Chrisjen Avasarala. (Though I'm still holding out hope Prax will show up again someday; I miss him.) All through The Expanse series I've admired Corey's focus on petty human squabbling and politicking in the face of grand, universe-changing discoveries. Nemesis Games is that thread turned up to eleven. It's not a cynical series, though; for every narrow-minded failure there's an equally small but important triumph of friendship or justice or well-meaning. It reminds me of Terry Pratchett, in a way. Not at all in Corey's style of writing or type of humor, but they both have a view of humanity which is simultaneously realistic and fond and exasperated. And if there's a bigger compliment than that, I don't know what it is. Artificial Condition by Martha Wells. Book 2 of the Murderbot Diaries. A security robot/cyborg armed with all sorts of guns and other methods of killing has hacked its governor module, allowing it to do whatever it wants, and nicknames itself Murderbot. But it turns out that what Murderbot really wants to do is spend hours watching dumb sci-fi TV shows, avoid eye contact or any social encounters with humans, and not have to deal with its own emotions. Unfortunately that last one is hard to avoid. In this book, Murderbot is heading to a mining planet where it knows something bad went down in its past, involving lots of human deaths. But Murderbot can't remember exactly what happened, since its memory was wiped, and so it's off to investigate. Getting to the planet means hitching a ride on a spaceship run by a massively complicated AI (which Murderbot promptly nicknames ART: Asshole Research Transport) and then getting a job as a human bodyguard to a group of scientists heading down to the planet's surface. Things, unsurprisingly, go wrong, and Murderbot finds itself with another pack of dumb humans in need of protection. I enjoyed Artificial Condition a lot, but it's not quite as good as the first book in the series, All Systems Red. Part of that is very simply that it's a middle book of the series, and it shows; progress in the larger plot is made, but not much, and there's a feeling of spinning our wheels while we wait for big events to happen. That said, it's still an extremely enjoyable novella (only about 120 pages), which builds out the world from what we learned in All Systems Red. Now we have sexbots and ship navigators, more about how different governments interact and function (or don't), and some hints as to what's going on with the company that created Murderbot. Plus there's Murderbot's wonderful narration, which honestly is worth the price of admission all on its own. A section from where it introduces ART to trashy entertainment: I watched seven more episodes of Sanctuary Moon with it hanging around my feed. Then it pinged me, like I somehow might not know it had been in my feed all this time, and sent me a request to go back to the new adventure show I had started to watch when it had interrupted me. (It was called Worldhoppers, and was about freelance explorers who extended the wormhole and ring networks into uninhabited star systems. It looked very unrealistic and inaccurate, which was exactly what I liked.) [...] “It’s not realistic,” I told it. “It’s not supposed to be realistic. It’s a story, not a documentary. If you complain about that, I’ll stop watching.” I will refrain from complaint, it said. (Imagine that in the most sarcastic tone you can, and you’ll have some idea of how it sounded.) So we watched Worldhoppers. It didn’t complain about the lack of realism. After three episodes, it got agitated whenever a minor character was killed. When a major character died in the twentieth episode I had to pause seven minutes while it sat there in the feed doing the bot equivalent of staring at a wall, pretending that it had to run diagnostics. Then four episodes later the character came back to life and it was so relieved we had to watch that episode three times before it would go on. At the climax of one of the main story lines, the plot suggested the ship might be catastrophically damaged and members of the crew killed or injured, and the transport was afraid to watch it. (That’s obviously not how it phrased it, but yeah, it was afraid to watch it.) I was feeling a lot more charitable toward it by that point so was willing to let it ease into the episode by watching one to two minutes at a time. After it was over, it just sat there, not even pretending to do diagnostics. It sat there for a full ten minutes, which is a lot of processing time for a bot that sophisticated. Then it said, Again, please. So I started the first episode again. C'mon, tell me you wouldn't read a million pages of that, plot or no plot.

[DW link for easier commenting]

[wewomenbookclub]

Listen: we all know positive thinking can be easier said than done. We all have negative thoughts, but sometimes negative thoughts can be consuming and ultimately impede us from fulfilling our dreams or our life’s potential. Here is a little something about the scientific research behind positive thinking and how it can change your brain, not to mention your way of life.

The Science of Positive Thinking: How Positive Thoughts Build Your Skills, Boost Your Health, and Improve Your Work

By: James Clear via Huffington Post.

Positive thinking sounds useful on the surface. (Most of us would prefer to be positive rather than negative.) But “positive thinking” is also a soft and fluffy term that is easy to dismiss. In the real world, it rarely carries the same weight as words like “work ethic” or “persistence.”

But those views may be changing.

Research is beginning to reveal that positive thinking is about much more than just being happy or displaying an upbeat attitude. Positive thoughts can actually create real value in your life and help you build skills that last much longer than a smile.

The impact of positive thinking on your work, your health, and your life is being studied by people who are much smarter than me. One of these people is Barbara Fredrickson.

Fredrickson is a positive psychology researcher at the University of North Carolina, and she published a landmark paper that provides surprising insights about positive thinking and its impact on your skills. Her work is among the most referenced and cited in her field, and it is surprisingly useful in everyday life.

Let’s talk about Fredrickson’s discovery and what it means for you...

What Negative Thoughts Do to Your Brain

Play along with me for a moment.

Let’s say that you’re walking through the forest and suddenly a tiger steps onto the path ahead of you. When this happens, your brain registers a negative emotion — in this case, fear.

Researchers have long known that negative emotions program your brain to do a specific action. When that tiger crosses your path, for example, you run. The rest of the world doesn’t matter. You are focused entirely on the tiger, the fear it creates, and how you can get away from it.

In other words, negative emotions narrow your mind and focus your thoughts. At that same moment, you might have the option to climb a tree, pick up a leaf, or grab a stick — but your brain ignores all of those options because they seem irrelevant when a tiger is standing in front of you.

This is a useful instinct if you’re trying to save life and limb, but in our modern society we don’t have to worry about stumbling across tigers in the wilderness. The problem is that your brain is still programmed to respond to negative emotions in the same way — by shutting off the outside world and limiting the options you see around you.

For example, when you’re in a fight with someone, your anger and emotion might consume you to the point where you can’t think about anything else. Or, when you are stressed out about everything you have to get done today, you may find it hard to actual start anything because you’re paralyzed by how long your to-do list has become. Or, if you feel bad about not exercising or not eating healthy, all you think about is how little willpower you have, how you’re lazy, and how you don’t have any motivation.

In each case, your brain closes off from the outside world and focuses on the negative emotions of fear, anger, and stress — just like it did with the tiger. Negative emotions prevent your brain from seeing the other options and choices that surround you. It’s your survival instinct.

Now, let’s compare this to what positive emotions do to your brain. This is where Barbara Fredrickson returns to the story.

What Positive Thoughts Do to Your Brain

Fredrickson tested the impact of positive emotions on the brain by setting up a little experiment. During this experiment, she divided her research subjects into five groups and showed each group different film clips.

The first two groups were shown clips that created positive emotions. Group 1 saw images that created feelings of joy. Group 2 saw images that created feelings of contentment.

Group 3 was the control group. They saw images that were neutral and produced no significant emotion.

The last two groups were shown clips that created negative emotions. Group 4 saw images that created feelings of fear. Group 5 saw images that created feelings of anger.

Afterward, each participant was asked to imagine themselves in a situation where similar feelings would arise and to write down what they would do. Each participant was handed a piece of paper with 20 blank lines that started with the phrase, “I would like to...”

Participants who saw images of fear and anger wrote down the fewest responses. Meanwhile, the participants who saw images of joy and contentment, wrote down a significantly higher number of actions that they would take, even when compared to the neutral group.

In other words, when you are experiencing positive emotions like joy, contentment, and love, you will see more possibilities in your life. These findings were among the first that suggested positive emotions broaden your sense of possibility and open your mind up to more options.

But that was just the beginning. The really interesting impact of positive thinking happens later...

How Positive Thinking Builds Your Skill Set

The benefits of positive emotions don’t stop after a few minutes of good feelings subside. In fact, the biggest benefit that positive emotions provide is an enhanced ability to build skills and develop resources for use later in life.

Let’s consider a real-world example.

A child who runs around outside, swinging on branches and playing with friends, develops the ability to move athletically (physical skills), the ability to play with others and communicate with a team (social skills), and the ability to explore and examine the world around them (creative skills). In this way, the positive emotions of play and joy prompt the child to build skills that are useful and valuable in everyday life.

These skills last much longer than the emotions that initiated them. Years later, that foundation of athletic movement might develop into a scholarship as a college athlete or the communication skills may blossom into a job offer as a business manager. The happiness that promoted the exploration and creation of new skills has long since ended, but the skills themselves live on.

Fredrickson refers to this as the “broaden and build” theory because positive emotions broaden your sense of possibilities and open your mind, which in turn allows you to build new skills and resources that can provide value in other areas of your life.

As we discussed earlier, negative emotions do the opposite. Why? Because building skills for future use is irrelevant when there is immediate threat or danger (like the tiger on the path).

All of this research begs the most important question of all: If positive thinking is so useful for developing valuable skills and appreciating the big picture of life, how do you actually get yourself to be positive?

How to Increase Positive Thinking in Your Life

What you can do to increase positive emotions and take advantage of the “broaden and build” theory in your life?

Well, anything that sparks feelings of joy, contentment, and love will do the trick. You probably know what things work well for you. Maybe it’s playing the guitar. Maybe it’s spending time with a certain person. Maybe it’s carving tiny wooden lawn gnomes.

That said, here are three ideas for you to consider...

1. Meditation — Recent research by Fredrickson and her colleagues has revealed that people who meditate daily display more positive emotions that those who do not. As expected, people who meditated also built valuable long-term skills. For example, three months after the experiment was over, the people who meditated daily continued to display increased mindfulness, purpose in life, social support, and decreased illness symptoms.

Note: If you’re looking for an easy way to start meditation, here is a 10-minute guided meditation that was recently sent to me. Just close your eyes, breathe, and follow along.

2. Writing — This study, published in the Journal of Research in Personality, examined a group of 90 undergraduate students who were split into two groups. The first group wrote about an intensely positive experience each day for three consecutive days. The second group wrote about a control topic.

Three months later, the students who wrote about positive experiences had better mood levels, fewer visits to the health center, and experienced fewer illnesses. (This blew me away. Better health after just three days of writing about positive things!)

Note: I used to be very erratic in my writing, but now I publish a new blog every Monday and Thursday. I’ve written more about my writing process and how you can stick to your goals in this blog and this blog.

3. Play — Schedule time to play into your life. We schedule meetings, conference calls, weekly events, and other responsibilities into our daily calendars... why not schedule time to play?

When was the last time you blocked out an hour on your calendar just to explore and experiment? When was the last time you intentionally carved out time to have fun? You can’t tell me that being happy is less important than your Wednesday meeting, and yet, we act like it is because we never give it a time and space to live on our calendars.

Give yourself permission to smile and enjoy the benefits of positive emotion. Schedule time for play and adventure so that you can experience contentment and joy, and explore and build new skills.

Happiness vs. Success (Which Comes First?)

There’s no doubt that happiness is the result of achievement. Winning a championship, landing a better job, finding someone you love — these things will bring joy and contentment to your life. But so often, we wrongly assume that this means happiness always follows success.

How often have you thought, “If I just get ___, then I’ll be set.”

Or, “Once I achieve ___, I’ll be satisfied.”

I know I’m guilty of putting off happiness until I achieve some arbitrary goal. But as Fredrickson’s “broaden and build” theory proves, happiness is essential to building the skills that allow for success.

In other words, happiness is both the precursor to success and the result of it.

In fact, researchers have often noticed a compounding effect or an “upward spiral” that occurs with happy people. They are happy, so they develop new skills, those skills lead to new success, which results in more happiness, and the process repeats itself.

Where to Go From Here

Positive thinking isn’t just a soft and fluffy feel-good term. Yes, it’s great to simply “be happy,” but those moments of happiness are also critical for opening your mind to explore and build the skills that become so valuable in other areas of your life.

Finding ways to build happiness and positive emotions into your life — whether it is through meditation, writing, playing a pickup basketball game, or anything else — provides more than just a momentary decrease in stress and a few smiles.

Periods of positive emotion and unhindered exploration are when you see the possibilities for how your past experiences fit into your future life, when you begin to develop skills that blossom into useful talents later on, and when you spark the urge for further exploration and adventure.

To put it simply: Seek joy, play often, and pursue adventure. Your brain will do the rest.

FULL SOURCE

[ah17hh]

you useless piece of crap via /r/emojipasta

you useless piece of crap

You 👆 useless 👩🏻 piece 🧩 of shit 💩. You 👆 absolute 💯 waste 😵 of space ⭐⚫ and air 🌬. You 👆 uneducated, ignorant 👌, idiotic 😜 dumb 🤪 swine 🐽😂, you’re an absolute 💯 embarrassment 😣 to humanity 🕴 and all 🤠 life 💓 as a whole 🕳. The magnitude 🔍 of your 👉 failure 🥴🤠 just now is so indescribably massive 🐘 that one ☝🏻 hundred 💯 years 📅 into the future 👨🏼 your 👉 name 🏷 will be used ♦ as moniker of evil 😈 for heretics. Even 🌃 if all 💪 of humanity 🕴 put 👏 together 👮‍♂️🐕 their collective intelligence 🧐 there is no 🚫 conceivable way ↕ they could have thought 🤔 up ☝ a way ↕ to fuck 🤬 up ⬆ on the unimaginable scale ⚖ you 👉🏻 just did. When 💕💦😩 Jesus 🧑 died 🐕🔫 for our sins 🧼, he 🧒 must 🔒 not have seen 👁 the sacrilegious act 🎭 we just witnessed 👀🙈 you 👉🏻 performing ➕👉, because if he 🧒 did he 👨 would have forsaken humanity 🧒 long 🍆 ago 👶🏽 so that your 👉 birth 👑 may ♦ have never 🚫 become 🔜 reality 💯. After 2️⃣ you 👆 die ☠, your 👉 skeleton 💀 will be displayed 💻 in a museum after 👀 being scientifically 👨‍🔬 researched 🔍 so that all 😳 future 👨🏼 generations 👶👪 may 🌼🌷🌹 learn 👨‍🏫 not to generate 👶👪 your 👉 bone ☠ structure, because every ☝ tiny 👌🏾 detail 📝📓🤝 anyone 👩 may 🌼🌷🌹 have in common ♦ with you 👉🏻 degrades 😭👌 them to a useless 👩🏻 piece 🧩 of trash 💕😘💗 and a burden to society 🗺. No 🚫 wonder ❓🤔 your 👉 father 👨🏻 questioned ❓ whether 💮 or not your 👉 were truly 💯 his 👋 son 🌞, for you'd have to not be a waste 😵 of carbon matter for anyone 👤 to love ❤ you 👆 like 👍 a family 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 member 👱‍♂️. Your 👉 birth 👑 made 🗿 it so that mankind 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 is worse ❌🚫 of in every 🤩 way ↕ you 👆 can possibly 🪓🙅🏻 imagine 🧠, and you 👆 have made 👉 it so that society 🗺 can never ❌ really ✅ recover into a state 🇺🇸 of organization 😡. Everything 😂 has forever 🕐🕔🕤 fallen 💨 into a bewildering chaos, through which unrecognizable core ⤴, you 👆 can only find 🔍 misfortune. I 👁 would say 💬 the apocalypse 🕔 is upon 👦 us 🇨🇳 but 🍑 this is merely 👌 the closest 🈴 word 🆔 humans 🕴 have for the sheer scale 🐍 of horror 👿👻🍆 that is now reality 💯. You 👆 have forever ♾ condemned everyone 👍 you 👆 love 😍 and know 🧠 into an eternal 🌋🆎💅🏿 state 🇺🇸 of suffering 😷, worse 🤩😘 than any human 🕴 concept 🧬 of hell 🔥. You 👆 are such an unholy 🚫🙌🏻 being, that if you 👆 step 🦶 within 🤞👏 a one ☝ hundred 💯 foot 👣 radius of a holy 👕 place 🏞🌆🌳 or a place 🏞🌆🌳 that has ever 😳 been deemed important ✨ by anyone 👩, your 👉 distorted 😜 sac religious 🙏 soul 👻 will ruin ❌ whatever ♂ meaning 😏 it ever 😳 had beyond ⏩ repair 🏗. You 👆 are an idiotic 😜, shiteating, dumbass 🙈💖✨ ape 🦧 and no 🚫 one ☝ has ever 😳 loved 💕 you 👉🏻. Rhodes Island 🏖 would have been better 👌 off if you'd never ❌ joined 🤩 us 🚶🏻🚶🏼. You 👆 are a lying 🤫, backstabbing, cowardly 🐮 useless 👩🏻 piece 🧩 of shit 💩 and I 👁 hate 😡 you 👉🏻 with every 👏 single 🕑 part 🍆 of my being. Even 🌃 this worlds 🌎 finest 👌 writers ✍ and poets 😍 from throughout 🤯 the ages 🤠👴🏿 could never ❌ hope 🕊 to accurately ☑ describe 🗣 the scale 🐍 on which you 👆 just fucked 🤿 up ⬆, and how incredibly 😚🤪 idiotic 😜 you 👆 are. Anyone 👤 that believes 🙅🏻 in any religion ⛪🕌🕍 out there should now realize 🤯 that they have been wrong 😡 this entire 👏 time ⏰, for if divine 😇 beings ❓ were real 💯, they would never ❌ have allowed 👮🏻‍♂️ a being such as you 👆 to stain 😷 the earth 🌍 and this universe ✨. In the future 📡 there will be horror 😱😳 stories 📖 made 🐧 about you 👉🏻, with the scariest part 🍆 of them being that the reader 📖 has to realize 🤯 that such an indescribable monster 😈 actually exists 💁, and that the horrific events 🎫 from the movie 🎬 have actually taken place 🏆 in the same world 🌎 that they live 🐙 in right ✔ now. You 👉🏻 are the absolute 💯 embodiment of everything 😂 that has ever 😳 been wrong ❌ on this earth 🌎, yet 🎩👓👍 you 👉🏻 manage 👩🏿‍🍳 to make 🛠 it so that that is only a small 🤏❌ part 🎛 of the evil 😈 that is your 👉 being. Never ❌ in the history 👨‍🏫 of mankind 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 has there been anyone 👩 that could have predicted such an eldrich abomination, but 😳 here you 👆 are. It’s hard 😤 to believe 💭 that I ☝ am seeing 👁 such an incredible 😯‼❗ failure 🥴🤠 with my own eyes 👁, but 🍑 here I ☝ am, so unfortunately 😔 I 👁 cannot ❌ deny ❎ your 👉 existence 💁. Even 🌃 if I 👁 did my very 💯 best 👌, my vocabulary is not able 💪 to describe 🗣 the sheer magnitude 🤯 of the idiotic 😜 mistake 😱 that is you 👆. Even 🌃 if time ⏰ travel ✈⛴🛳 some day 📆 will be invented 💰, there still 👏 would not be a single 🕑 soul 👻 willing 😷 to go 💨 back 🔙 in time ⏰ to before 😂 this moment 😳 to fix 🛠🔩 history 🚫, because having to witness 🕴 such incredible 👀 horrors 😱 if they failed 😔 would have to many 💯 mental 🤯 and physical 👅🔭🔬 drawbacks that not even 🌃 the bravest soul 👼🏼 in history 📚 would be willing 😏 to risk 🙅‍♀️ it. I 👁 cannot 🙅‍♂️ imagine 💭 the pure 🏳 dread 💦 your 👉 mother 👪 must 🤜 have felt when 🤔 she 👩🏽 had to carry ✊🏻 a baby 👶 for nine ⏰ months 📆 and then giving 👉 birth 👑 to such a wretched 😫 monster 😈 as you 👉🏻. Not a single 🕑 word 🆔 of the incoherent, illogical rambling you 👉🏻 may ♦ be wanting 🏃 to do to defend 🛡 yourself or apologize 🙍‍♂️ would ever 😳 be able 💪 to make 🔨 up ☝ for what you 👆 just did. The countries 🇺🇸 of the world 🌎 would have wanted 😍 to make 🛠 laws 🇺🇸 preventing such a terrible 🧠🤏 event 🎫 like 👍 this from ever 😠 happening 😱 again ❌😬, but 🍑 sadly 😞 this is not possible ☠ since 💦 your 👉 horrific actions 🎭 just now have shattered every 👏 form 🎹 of order 📑 this world 🌍🌎🌏 once had, making 🛠 concepts 🤓🥳🤩 such as laws 🇺🇸 irrelevant 📉. Right ✔ from the moment 😳 I 👁 first 💜🔮 set 🌃 my eyes 👁 on you 👉🏻 I 👁 knew 🤔 you 👆 were an absolute 💯 abomination of everything 🤔 that is wrong ❌ with humanity 🕴. I 👁 was hoping 🙏 I 👁 would have been able 👍🏻 to prevent 🙅‍♂️ your 👉 evil 😈 from being released 🎥 upon 👦 this world 🌎 by tagging along ↩ and keeping ✊ my eye 👁 on you 👆, but 😳 it is clear 🤭 to me now that not even 🌃 the greatest ❤ efforts ���😫😪 would have been able 💪 to prevent 🙅🏻‍♀️❌⛔ a terrible 🧠🤏 event ❗ in this scale 🐍 from occurring. You 👉🏻 are the worst 😡 human 🧒 being, or even 💅 just being in general 🐧, that I ☝ have ever 😳 had the misfortune of witnessing 👀. Events ❗ like 👍 the infected ☣ plague 🐀 apparently 💢 only happened 🌚 with the goal 💕💦😫 of teaching 👩‍🏫 humanity 🧒 to survive 🙏🏼😩😭 such a horrible 🤮 event 🎉 as the one 1️⃣ you 👉🏻 just created 🧚‍♀️, but 🍑 not even 🌃 mankind’s greatest 📈 trials 🇮🇹 were able 💪 to even 🌃 slightly 🙂 prepare 👓📖📚 anyone 👩 for the insufferable evil 👿 you 👆 have just created 💯. If you 👆 ever 😠 had them, your 👉 children 👶 would be preemptively killed 💀 to protect 👒 this universe ✨ from the possibility 🙀🍆 of anyone 👩 in your 👉 bloodline 💉 being even 🌃 half 1️⃣➗2️⃣ as bad 📉 as you 👆 are, except 👋 you 👆 will never ❌ be able 💪 to have children 👶, because not a single 🕑 human 🕴 being will ever 😠 want ⚠ to come ☔ within 🤞👏 a hundred 💯 mile 🛣 radius of you 👆 and anything 😨 you 👆 have ever 😠 touched 🤚. You 👆 are a colossal disappointment not only to your 👉 parents 👫, but 😳 to your 👉 ancestors 👻 and entire 🇺🇸 bloodline 💉. The disgusting 🤢 mistake 😱 that you 👆 have just made 🗿 is so incredibly 👀 terrible 🤮 that everyone 👍 who would ever 😠 be to hear 👂 about it would spontaneously feel an indescribable mixture 🧁 of immense 😱 anger 😤😡, fear 😱 and anxiety 😖 that emotionally 💟 and physically 👅🔭🔬 they would never ❌ truly 💯 be the same ever 😳 again 🔁. The sheer scale ⚖ of your 👉 mistake ✨🧚, if ever 😳 to be materialized, would not only surpass the size ⬇ of the world 🌎, but 🍑❓ it would reach ✋ far 🌌 beyond 🧑🏼 the edges 🍆 of the known 🧠, and almost 🤔😔💭 certainly 🧂 the unknown 🎇 universe 🌎🌍🌏. I 👁 could sit 🏚 here and write ✍ paragraphs 😩😭😓, nay ‼, books 📖 describing 🗣 your 👉 immense 😱 failure 🥴🤠, yet 😏 even 💅 if I 👁 were to dedicate 🏀 my life 👤 to describing 🗣 the reality 💯 of what has just gone 👱🏻💪🏾 down ⬇ here, and I 👁 would spend 😵 every 👏 moment 😳 of it until my heart ❤ stops 🛑 beating 💓 working 🏗 as hard 😤 and efficiently as possible 🔝, yet 🎩👓👍 there is not even 💅 a snowballs chance 🎲 in hell 👺 that I ☝ would be able 💪 to come ☔ close 🤞🏻 to transcribing the absolute ⚱ shitshow you 👆 have just released 🐢➡🌊 upon ↙ the world 🌏💫. You 👆 are an irresponsible, idiotic 🤪, disgusting 🤮, unloved, horrible 😠 excuse 👣 for a living being who’s soul 👻 contains 🗞 less ➖ humanity 🕴 than every 👏 ginger 🍞 in history 🚫 combined. The absolute 💯 disgust 🤮 I 👁 feel when 🤔 thinking 🤔 about anything 🌌 that has even 🌃 a slight 🙁 resemblance 💁‍♂️ to anything 🌌 that might 🤔 have to do with you 👉🏻 and your 👉 unholy 🚫🙌🏻 actions 🎭 is so incredibly 😚🤪 great 😁👍 that when ❓ I 👁 am honest 💯 about it I 👁 think 🤔 that even 🌃 I 👁 do not posses 👨‍👨‍👦‍👦 a consciousness 🧠 great 🤔❓ enough 👅 to comprehend 🤔 my own feelings about it. When ❓ people 👥 of Columbia fought 🤼‍♂️👩‍🚒🤼‍♀️ to break 💔 free 🆓 from Lungmen, countless 🧛‍♀️⛔ soldiers 🙍‍♂️ fought 👈🏿💢🗡 and lost 🏳 their lives 💓 in favor 😏 of a chance 🎲 at a better 👌 future 👨🏼 for their children 👶, they did not give 👉 their lives 👤 to have you 👆 fuck 🖕 the world 🌍🌎🌏 up ☝ beyond ⏩ repair 🙌 to the degree 🎓 that you 👆 are dosin right ✔ now. Honestly 😇, even 💅 when 💕💦😩 technology 🔬 advances 😍😇 and studies 📿⛪ on the subject 🔥💥❄ become 🦋 more and more accurate ☑, I 👁 do not think 🤔 humanity 🧒 will ever 😠 truly 💯 be able 💪 to understand 🤔 what your 👉 failure 💀 actually means 😏 for the universe 😱🌌🙌. My hate 😲😠 for you 👉🏻 and everything 🤔 you 👉🏻 stand 🚹 for is so much 💯 deeper 💦 than the depths ❤ of Shambala that you 👆 could probably 😕 take 👊 the entire 👏 Lungmen population 👥 down 👇 there and back 🔙 up ☝ around 🔁 twenty 💓 million 💯 times ⌛ before ⬅ you 👆 would have sunk 💥 to the end 🔚 of my hate 😲😠, and honestly 😇, I ☝ do not want 😍 to exaggerate, but 🍑 I ☝ think 🤔 that that i ☝

Submitted July 31, 2020 at 04:37PM by iiGalacticBeast via reddit https://ift.tt/2Xg0syN

[ericsburden-blog]

Why I Spent $500,000 Buying a Blog That Generates No Revenue

(If you are wondering, the image of me above was taken when I used to work at KISSmetrics with Hiten Shah… I used to have hair)

In early January 2017, I purchased the KISSmetrics website for $500,000.

If you go to the site, you’ll notice that it forwards here to NeilPatel.com (which I will get into later in the post).

The $500,000 didn’t get me the company, KISSmetrics, or any of the revenue streams. The parent company, Space Pencil, is continually improving and developing the product.

And on top of that, there are restrictions. I can’t just pop up a competing company or any company on the KISSmetrics site.

So why did they sell me the domain? And why would I pay $500,000 for it?

I can’t fully answer why they sold it, but I do know a lot of their customers came from word of mouth, conferences, paid ads, and other forms of marketing that didn’t include SEO or content marketing.

For that reason, the domain probably wasn’t as valuable to them as it was to me. And of course, who wouldn’t want extra cash?

I’m assuming they are very calculated because they are an analytics company, so they probably ran the numbers on how much revenue the inbound traffic was generating them and came to the conclusion that the $500,000 price tag seemed worth it.

Now, before I get into why I spent $500,000 on the domain, let me first break down my thought process as I am buying out a lot of properties in the marketing space (more to be announced in the future).

Why am I buying sites that aren’t generating revenue?

This wasn’t the first or the last site that I’ll buy in the space.

I recently blogged about how I bought Ubersuggest. And it wasn’t generating a single dollar in revenue.

Well technically, there were ads on the site, but I quickly killed those off.

And eventually, I ported it over to NeilPatel.com.

When I am looking at sites to buy, I am only looking for 1 thing… traffic. And of course, the quality (and relevancy) of that traffic.

See, I already have a revenue stream, which is my ad agency, Neil Patel Digital.

So, my goal is to find as many sites that have a similar traffic profile to NeilPatel.com and leverage them to drive my agency more leads.

How do you know you won’t lose money?

I don’t!

This approach doesn’t guarantee I’ll make more money.

I look at the business as tons of tiny experiments. You don’t build a huge business through one simple marketing strategy or tactic.

You have to combine a lot of little things to get your desired outcome.

And sometimes you’ll make mistakes along the way that will cost you money, which is fine. You have to keep one thing in mind… without testing, you won’t be big.

With my ad agency, we tend to mainly have U.S. clients. Yes, we serve other regions as well… for example, we have an ad agency in Brazil.

But I myself mainly focus on driving traffic to the U.S. ad agency, and the other teams just replicate as I don’t speak Portuguese, German, or any of the required languages for the other regions we are in.

So, when I buy companies, I look for traffic that is ideally in the U.S.

Sure, the ad agency can work with companies in Australia, Canada, and even the United Kingdom, but it’s tough.

There’s a huge difference in currency between Australia and the U.S. and the same goes for Canada.

And with the U.K. there is a 5 to 8-hour time zone difference, which makes it a bit more difficult to communicate with clients.

That’s why when I buy a site, I’m ideally looking for U.S. traffic.

When I bought Ubersuggest it had very little U.S. traffic. Indonesia and India were the two most popular regions.

But I bought it because I knew I could build a much better tool and over time grow the U.S. traffic by doing a few email blasts, getting on Product Hunt, and by creating some press.

And I have…

As you can see from the screenshot above, U.S. is the most popular region followed by India and Brazil.

Over time it shouldn’t be too difficult to 3 or even 4x that number as long as I release more features.

Now, my costs on Ubersuggest have gotten into the 6 figures per month, and I am not generating any income from it.

There is no guarantee that it will generate any revenue, but I have a pretty effective sales funnel, which I will share later in the post. Because of that sales funnel my risk with Ubersuggest is pretty low.

As long as I can grow the traffic enough, I should be able to monetize.

What about KISSmetrics?

As for KISSmetrics, I mainly bought the domain for the blog traffic.

During its peak it was generating 1,260,681 unique visitors per month:

By the time I bought the blog, traffic had dropped to 805,042 unique visitors per month:

That’s a 36% drop in traffic. Ouch!

And then to make matters worse, I decided that I wanted to cut the traffic even more.

There were so many articles on KISSmetrics that were outdated and irrelevant, so I had no choice but to cut them.

For example, there were articles about Vine (which Twitter purchased and killed), Google Website Optimizer (no longer exists), Mob Wars (a Facebook game that no longer exists)… and the list goes on and on.

In addition to that, I knew that I could never monetize irrelevant traffic. Yes, more traffic is good, but only as long as it is relevant.

I instantly cut the KISSmetrics blog in half by “deleting” over 1,024 blog posts. Now, I didn’t just delete them, I made sure I added 301 redirects to the most relevant pages here on NeilPatel.com.

Once I did that, my traffic dropped again. I was now sitting at 585,783 unique visitors a month.

It sucks, but it had to be done. The last thing I wanted to do was spend time and money maintaining old blog posts that would never drive a dollar in revenue.

I knew that if someone was going to come to my blog to research Vine, there was little to no chance that the person would convert into a 6-figure consulting contract.

After I pruned and cropped the KISSmetrics blog, I naturally followed the same path of Ubersuggest and merged it in to NeilPatel.com.

The merge

The KISSmetrics merge was a bit more complicated than Ubersuggest.

With Ubersuggest, I didn’t have a keyword research tool on NeilPatel.com, so all I had to do was slap on a new design, add a feature or two, and port it over.

With KISSmetrics, a lot of the content was similar to NeilPatel.com. For the ones that were similar, I kept the NeilPatel.com version considering this blog generates more traffic than the KISSmetrics one.

As for all of the content that was unique and different, I ended up moving it over and applying 301 redirects.

If I decided to skip the pruning and cropping stage that I described above, the KISSmetrics blog would have had more traffic. And when I merged it in with NeilPatel.com I would have done even better.

But in marketing you can can’t focus on vanity metrics like how many more unique visitors you are getting per month. You need to keep your eye on the prize.

And for me, that’s leads.

The more leads I generate for my ad agency, the more likely I’ll increase my revenue.

Here’s my lead count for the weeks prior to the KISSmetrics merge:

When looking at the table above, keep in mind it shows leads from the U.S. only.

The KISSmetrics blog was merged on the 25th. When you add up all of the numbers from the previous week, there were 469 leads in total, of which 61 were marketing qualified leads.

That means there were 61 leads that the sales reps were able to contact as the vast majority of leads are companies that are too small for us to service.

When you look at the week of the 25th, there were a total of 621 leads. 92 where marketing qualified leads.

Just from that one acquisition, I was able to grow my marketing qualified leads by 50.8%. 🙂

I know what you are thinking though. The week after the 25th (7/2) the leads tanked again. Well, you have to keep in mind that the table only shows leads from the U.S. and during that week there was a national holiday, the 4th of July. So, leads were expected to be low.

But still, even with the holiday, we generated 496 leads, 68 of which where marketing qualified. We still generated more marketing qualified leads than when we didn’t have the KISSmetrics traffic.

The early results show that this is going to work out (or so I hope). If you ever want to consider buying up sites that aren’t generating revenue, you need to know your numbers like the back of your hand.

My sales funnel

Some of you are probably wondering how I promote my agency from this site. As I mentioned earlier, I will share my funnel and stats with you.

The way I monetize the traffic is by collecting leads (and my sales reps turn those leads into customers).

On the homepage, you will see a URL box.

Once you enter a URL, we do a quick analysis (it’s not 100% accurate all of the time).

And then we show you how many technical SEO errors you have and collect your information (this is how you become a lead).

And assuming we think you are a good fit, you see a screen that allows you to schedule a call (less than 18% of the leads see this).

From there someone on my team will do a discovery call with you. Assuming things go well, a few of us internally review everything to double check we can really help, we then create projections and a presentation, and then we pitch you for your money (in exchange for services of course).

That’s the funnel on NeilPatel.com in a nutshell… It’s pretty fine-tuned as well. For example, when someone books a call, we send them text reminders using Twilio to show up to the call as we know this increase the odds of you getting on the phone.

We even do subtle things like asking for your “work email” on the lead form. We know that 9 out 10 leads that give us a Gmail, Hotmail, AOL, or any other non-work email are typically not qualified.

And it doesn’t stop there… there are lead forms all over NeilPatel.com for this same funnel.

If you are reading a blog post like this, you’ll see a bar at the top that looks something like:

Or if you are about to exit, you will see an exit popup that looks like:

You’ll even see a thank you page that promotes my ad agency once you opt-in:

And if I don’t convince you to reach out to us for marketing help right then and there, you’ll also receive an email or two from me about my ad agency.

As you can see, I’ve fine-tuned my site for conversions. So much so, that every 1,000 unique visitors from the U.S. turns into 4.4 leads. And although that may not seem high, keep in mind that my goal isn’t to get as many leads as possible, I’m optimizing for quality over quantity as I don’t want to waste my sales reps time.

For example, I had 2 reps that had a closing ratio of 50% last month. That means for every 2 deals they pitched, 1 would sign up for a 6-figure contract, which is an extremely high closing ratio. Hence, I am trying to focus on quality so everyone in sales can get to 50%, as it makes the business more efficient and profitable.

The last thing you want to do is pay a sales rep tons of money to talk to 50 people to only find 1 qualified lead. That hurts both you and your sales reps.

Conclusion

The strategy I am using to buy websites may seem risky, but I know my numbers like the back of my hand. From an outsider’s perspective it may seem crazy, but to me, it is super logic.

And the reason I buy sites for their traffic is that I already have a working business model. So, buying sites based on their traffic is much cheaper than buying sites for their revenue. In addition to that, my return on investment is much larger.

For example, if I wanted to buy KISSmetrics (the whole business), I would have to spend millions and millions of dollars.

I’m looking for deals, it’s how you grow faster without having to raise venture capital.

When you use this strategy, there is no guarantee you will make a return on your investment, but if you spend time understanding the numbers you can reduce your risk.

I knew that going into this KISSmetrics deal that I will generate at least an extra $500,000 in profit from this one acquisition. Realistically it should be much more than that as the additional leads seem to be of the same quality, and the numbers are penciling out for it to add well into the millions in revenue per year.

But before you pull the trigger and buy up a few sites in your space, there are a few things you need to keep in mind:

Don’t buy sites that rely on 1 traffic source – you don’t want to buy sites that only have Facebook traffic. Or even Google traffic. Ideally, any site you buy should have multiple traffic sources (other than paid ads) as it will reduce your risk in case they lose their traffic from a specific channel.

Buy old sites – sites that are less than 3 years old are risky. Their numbers fluctuate more than older sites.

Spend time understanding the audience – run surveys, dive deep into Google Analytics… do whatever you can to ensure that the site you are buying has an audience that is similar to your current business.

Be patient and look for deals – I hit up hundreds of sites every month. Some people hate my emails and won’t give me the time of day. That’s ok. I’m a big believer and continually pushing forward until I find the right deal. I won’t spend money just because I am getting antsy.

Get creative – a lot of people think their site is worth more than it really is. Try to explain to them what it is really worth using data. I also structure deals in unique ways, such as I gave KISSmetrics up to 6 months before they had to transition to a new domain (and to some extent they are still allowed to use the existing domain for their client login area). You can even work out payment plans, seller based financing, or equity deals… you just have to think outside the box.

So, what do you think about my acquisition strategy? Are you going to try it out?

The post Why I Spent $500,000 Buying a Blog That Generates No Revenue appeared first on Neil Patel.

Why I Spent $500,000 Buying a Blog That Generates No Revenue

[eastithoughtyousaidweest]

Tryna China?

6/30

Made our way up to Shenzhen today. Shenzhen is a really interesting city in terms of its history. It’s in Southern China, just north of Hong Kong. Historically, it was a small town, a fishing village actually with only about 300,000 people. Then, after Mao Zedong died, China decided to institute an Open Door Policy in an attempt to develop and catch up with the rest of the developed world. As part of this, they decided to make Shenzhen a sort of experiment; they designated it as a “Special Economic Zone” in the 1980s and began encouraging investment in the region. Then took the land, which had belonged communally to farmers, and began leasing it at no cost to developers from all over China. People began migrating in from around the country, both educated entrepreneurs and construction workers/other manual labor. By the 1990s, Shenzhen was physically expanding outside the region the government has designated the SEZ; by the 2000s, foreign investment began pouring in, connecting the city with global markets.

In 40 years, the city grew from 300,000 to somewhere between 15 and 20 million. Nobody even knows its true size. In other words, the population was multiplied over 66 times. In other other words, that’s ridiculous.

Today, Shenzhen is home to financial markets, manufacturers, and businesses from every corner of the world. With development that fast, you better believe sustainability is gonna become an issue real fast. The challenge for Shenzhen is how they can maintain their prosperity and growth while also confronting shortages of land, water and energy. Already, they have implemented regulations that require all new buildings to meet green standards, and have implemented a carbon emissions exchange, which requires companies to buy credits for every ton of carbon they emit, thereby incentivizing them to decrease their impact. Amazingly, Shenzhen actually is full of green space, has clean air and huge nature preserves, all as a result of city-level efforts.

Personally, I’ve been having some mixed feelings about this trip. Each day, we’ve gone to a series of lectures, site visits, or workshops all related to all aspects of climate change, from super-technical powerpoints about green tech to discussions of city climate action policies to tours of power plants and waste management facilities. I know these are all really integral aspects of the overall discussion on climate change, and I definitely recognize the value of educating myself on topics across the board. However, as I’ve moved away from specifically “green” work in my own life, and more towards community organizing, I’ve found it really hard to motivate myself to engage in some of these topics. I often feel like a super detailed discussion of the chemistry of marine bacteria (what I’m listening to in the background as I write this to stay awake) is just totally irrelevant to me or the work I want to do. I struggle with that because I know science is valuable, and that this research often leads to tech or discoveries that would impact me or things I care about. But I’m tempted to think that I can just leave the science to the experts and focus on the larger political change that will allow their work to get implemented outside a powerpoint presentations in a conference room. I feel bad about this because I used to think of myself as someone with infinite curiosity, who values learning for learning’s sake. And in my head, I do. But when I’m here in this situation, I’m not eagerly devouring this knowledge in front of me, knowledge I’m really lucky to even have the chance to learn about because so many who actually would love to learn about this don’t have that chance. But I just feel bored and tired, and more interested in planning what I’m gonna eat next or what fun thing I’m gonna do tonight. I feel hedonistic and exploitative, like I’m on this academic trip but all I wanna do it have fun.

Why is that? Maybe I’m just burnt out because I didn’t really get a decompression time between graduating and this to refresh my curiosity stores. Cause really the thought of any kind of school is pretty distasteful to me now, even about things I like. What does excite me is thoughts of living with Mandy, seeing Lan, going on a road trip with Gary, finishing my doc, going snorkeling in Malaysia, singing karaoke, doing organizing, cooking, yoga, sleeping.

Honestly, I even feel tired of building new relationships to an extent. Like in the past I always felt bad about spending time along or not going out, but here, I often feel more drawn to just walking on my own, working on my own, going to bed. I’ve definitely had to drag myself to be social sometimes. I mean, I think a big factor there is jut physical exhaustion. And also maybe a maturity, where I don’t feel as insecure about relationships to a point where I feel guilty and like my friendships are at risk every time others hang out and I’m not there. But to an extent that does still exist, because now I feel bad for not wanting to hang out, and I think that feeling comes from feeling like if I was there, I’d have a great time and form memories. I think it’s true that, especially in a new place for a limited time, the value and payoff of saying yes is huge. I have a short window to build relationships, groups are forming fast, so breaking in later will be harder, and who knows when I’ll be here again. I haven’t regretted going out yet, and I don’t think I will. The question is more about how do  I go into things with a positive mindset so I can not only be there but be totally me.

Maybe that itself is part of the problem. I’m putting a lot of pressure on myself to be this spontaneous, adventurous leader, which makes it disappointing when others don’t follow and in general forces me to take a risk by putting a potentially unpopular idea out there that may get shot down. But no. Taking those risks isn’t a problem; they’re exactly who I want myself to be. The key instead is to a) take the risk all the way and really pitch it and lead, b) to not worry so much about who’s not in and instead embrace those who are, and c) recognize when spending time with people you like is more valuable than forcing a wild idea that’s gonna lose a lot of them, and stepping back.

Ok, so the takeaway here is to come up with an idea and own it. Pitch it to others and see who bites. Work a little with those on the fence and don’t put much energy in the definite nos. And then go do it, and while you’re there, talk to people, ask real questions, and enjoy being in the moment. You’re tired now, but you won’t remember that anyway.

<3 Scaht

New Words (these are just how they sound and how I spell them in my head, and doesn’t include tone marks, so be wary)

• Xiu-small

• Dai-large

• Bu-no

• Bu hao isul-Excuse me (embarrassed)

7/2

So before I left for this trip, I was talking to my friend from Singapore and telling her I was pumped to eat some spicy spicy food here.

“Be careful Scott,” she responded.

“Oh no, I love spicy. I wanna experience it,” I said.

“Well there’s experiencing it, and then there’s ending up in the hospital,” she said.

“Eh, I’m ready to take that risk.”

I wasn’t ready.

Just to soothe you, Mom, I didn’t go to the hospital. But here’s what did happen.

The cuprit was this Szechuan hotpot place we went to last night. Hotpot, if you don’t know, is when you sit around a table with a boiling pot of soup in the middle. You order a bunch of meat, fish, tofu, and veggies, all raw, and then stick it in the pot to cook. Then you fish it out with your chopsticks and chow.

The soup my table got with nothin to fuck with: deep, oily red with dried chili peppers floating like shark fins on the surface.

The food arrived on a metal cart, stocked with mushrooms, thin-sliced beef, lotus root, tofu skin, corn on the cob, and a whole fish, head, tail and all. The last thing they brought out took it to a whole nother level though: a plate of live shrimp, skewered on wooden sticks, legs and antennae wriggling frantically. I couldn’t believe it, and couldn’t stand the sight of these little creatures, already stabbed through, just laying on that plate suffering, so I grabbed them and stuck them in the boiling pot as fast as possible. I was a murderer, though perhaps a merciful one, and it almost ruined my appetite. But it was better than the plate of hell.

Anyway, the rest of the meal was less traumatic. I filled my little plate over and over with food, all saturated with chili heat. I only stopped eating to toss more in the pot, to chat briefly in between bites, or to take swigs of tea to stop the coughing fits that sometimes resulted from a chili seed or peppercorn straight to the throat.

After over two hours, I took my last bite of cabbage and slumped back, belly bulging. The table was splattered with red chili broth, littered with greasy, gleaming bowls, and strewn with crumpled napkins streaked with sauce and saliva. An apocalyptic scene.

Despite this, in a totally irresponsible move, we headed to the dessert display. Which of course had unlimited ice cream. That, along with tiny cakes and some fruit chunks to delude myself into thinking I was being healthy, joined the landfill of food in my belly. Finally, we headed out, smiling at our achievement.

The satisfaction wouldn’t last.

About an hour and a half later, the cramps began. Subtle at first, then growing in waves, like sharp, surprise needles to the gut. Pressure began to build in my stomach and slowly move downward, a heavy, gurgling bubble on its way to an inevitable burst. I tried to be civil, tried to hold it until we arrived to the bar we were going to, but finally my will began to crack. I started asking my Chinese-speaking friends if they saw anywhere I could use a bathroom. It was about 10pm, so most things around us looked dark and unwelcoming. But luckily, Vicki asked a policeman and found me a public bathroom right down the block. I walked towards it, my pace rapidly increasing, my strides getting wider and finally breaking into a full-on sprint, or as much as I could sprint while also clenching my cheeks.

I shoved the stall door open with a bang.

All squat toilets. Fine.

But wait.

No toilet paper. Not fine.

“There’s no toilet paper anywhere,” I said to my friends, trying to stay calm but my voice rising with unmistakable panic.

Thank god for my friend Thomas, who heroically volunteered to go buy me some. As for me, I had no more time on the clock. I commenced the squat.

I won’t go into great detail about the next few minutes. If you’d like that, please contact me privately and I’d be happy to paint a comprehensive picture. What I will say is that when I finally straightened my legs again, I felt a mix of relief, pride, and physical lightness that I’d never felt before.

Unfortunately, the retribution continued that night at the hotel. And the next morning. When I woke up, I felt headachy, stomachachy, and just generally achy: The Hotpot Hangover.

For breakfast, I ate a tiny plain bun, for lunch, a plain baguette. By 11pm that night, I’d settled down enough for some tea and an orange. I went to bed knowing I’d survive to eat another meal. But I also knew that some scars had formed, both on my intestinal walls and in my mind.

Be careful what you wish for. It might give you explosive diarrhea.

<3 Scaht

7/5

I had a really interesting conversation today with Vicki and Jasmine, another Chinese student who’s been sort of leading a lot of the logistics of the trip.

See, a few of us have felt kind of uncomfortable during the sessions we’ve gone to because certain people, all from the US and Europe, constantly asked questions. The problem wasn’t asking questions; I’m all for curiosity. The problem was that they would ask them throughout the entire presentation, to the point where we’d go over time and the presenter wouldn’t even get to finish. Additionally, often times the presenters didn’t have the best English, and they couldn’t answer some of the very technical questions they’d ask about policies or technology. Then the askers would get really frustrated and shake their heads at each other, which frustrated me because we’re in their country, and if we really want to communicate with people in China that badly, we should learn their language, not expect them to adapt to us and then get angry when they don’t.

Anyway, I asked Vicki and Jasmine about how they felt about the Westerners asking all those questions. And their response was different than mine.

Jasmine told me that the stereotype of Chinese students was that they’re very obedient to their teachers and don’t ask questions, and she thought that was pretty true. Vicki argued back that things were changing, and that students were starting to push back and ask more things openly. They both told me that the pressure to not ask questions came for them from messages from authority figures, like parents or teachers, telling them not to be so outspoken or that their questions were dumb.

I told them my feelings about the lack of willingness to be aware of the cultural context, how I felt like the Westerners who were asking a lot of questions were failing to respect the fact that that’s unusual here, and so it may catch speakers off-guard and they may not even have answers for you right away. Vicki said while she agreed that people should be respectful of the culture they’re operating under, she also had found this trip really valuable because of that clash. She really liked coming face-to-face with Western approaches to learning, and felt like it challenged her to break out of how she was taught to learn and want to ask more questions.

So in the end, I was surprised that what I found embarrassing and dominant behavior, she found inspiring. I guess it just shows how a view from the outside on a culture, combined with that outside view’s own context, can take away something completely different than what someone from within that culture might. Of course, this can be dangerous when it leads to judgment or condemnation without understanding. But I learned from this convo that it can also offer new perspectives on the positives of one’s own culture that you might not see or might take for granted from within it.

<3 Scaht

New Words (in parentheses are tone numbers, separated by syllable. 1 is neutral, 2 is up, 3 is down-up, 4 is down)

• Buyong-no need

• Hao shir-delicious (1, 2)

• Hao shir ma-is it good? (1,1,2)

• Hao li hai-you’re cool! (1, 2, 4)

• Wo li la-I’m almost here

• Mai dan-Can I have the bil? (1,4)

7/8

After a long last day of exploring Guangzhou and a closing dinner where we took countless mini shots of baijo, a terrible, terrible rice wine that tastes like the kind of alcohol a frat would buy in bulk at Cosco, Thomas, Connor and I went around 12:30 am to get some massages. Which sounds creepy, but here it’s totally normal. Although happy endings are a real thing, which you often have to specifically ask them not to do.

We signed up for the oil massage and they took us to our individual rooms. My masseuse was a sorta beefy dude with a kind smile, who told me to take off my shirt, unbutton my shorts and lay face down on the table, all with hand signals of course. I let him know my neck hurt and I wanted some work on it, which he understood, and then he went in.

This man was skillful. He dug deep into my shoulder blades, neck, traps, lower back, upper butt cheek, pretty much everywhere my body needed most. Elbows, knuckles, palms, he used it all. About halfway in, he hopped up on the table and straddled me so he could get extra leverage. It definitely took some deep breaths on my part to get through the pain, but it was the good kind of pain that I knew was gonna make my body sing afterwards.

The next phase was the scraping. At the time, I had no idea what that was, or even that it was gonna happen; it had been an option on the list when we signed up, but I never was explicitly asked if I wanted it. But I looked it up after, and what I found out is that it is also called gua sha and it is a traditional Chinese medicinal practice that is thousands of years old and used to treat chronic pain and improve blood flow and the nervous system. Basically, the person applying the treatment takes something with an edge, such as a plastic disc or a coin, and rubs it repeatedly down the muscles of the back and neck. This causes petechiae, or capillary bleeding that leaks blood into your skin cells, leaving what looks like reddish-purple bruises over the entire treated area. However, they’re not bruises and they don’t hurt. In fact, while its effects are still being studied, trials have found evidence of its benefits.

Anyway, all I knew is that it felt like this guy started, asked me if it was ok, and I said yeah. It felt like he was giving me a nice back scratch for like 15 or 20 minutes, so I was totally down. But when I got out of the room, Thomas noticed something on my neck; it was the petechiae. He pulled back my shirt and looked at my back.

“You’re fine,” he began. “But you’re gonna freak out when you see your back.”

I wasn’t in pain or anything, so I didn’t really feel worried. But when we got back in the room, I pulled off my shirt and looked in the mirror.

“WHAT THE FUCK”

My ENTIRE BACK was purple, as if I’d been beaten. I touched it and felt no pain, but it truly looked terrifying. Pretty damn weird.

Anyway, I’ll get to freak a bunch of people out a breakfast tomorrow, so that’s fun.

<3 Scaht.

New Words (in parentheses are tone numbers, separated by syllable. 1 is neutral, 2 is up, 3 is down-up, 4 is down)

• Da bian-poop (4, 4)

• Xiao bian-pee (3,4)

• Yo yu-squid (2,2)

• Zhang yu-octopus (1,2)

• Pong yo-friend(2, none)

• Jek hoy-go straight

• Yuo-Right

• Zuo-Left

Final China Reflections

Executive Summary of what I learned about climate and energy policy:

There’s a whole lot of tensions between China's rapid development and environmental sustainability. They want to grow and make the moneys, but the speed at which they’re doing it means huge impacts on air quality, water quality, soil health, overcrowding, and more. This is something they’ve started adapting to in the face of public pressure about health concerns, but some of that has just meant doing things like funding coal plants in other countries instead of their own, so it’s still something that needs to be monitored and pushed. A big part of China’s sustainability push is also about image; many state-funded "sustainable" projects that exhibit fancy new technology are often more exhibitions than actual scalable solutions. On the other hand, some of the private companies we saw that are implementing sustainable tech are finding more success, as they're operating under a framework of seeking profit, which allows them to be more realistic about what they invest in.

If you want to read in-depth about my entire group’s analysis, we wrote a big ol’ report on technology, economics, urban development and policy. If you wanna see it, message me and I’ll send it your way.

Other than that, I think my posts above pretty much sum up a lot of what I learned. I’m so grateful to each and every one of my Chinese friends who so gracefully translated and navigated and babysat us throughout this trip. But more than that, they’re just super cool people who I had great conversations with, great karaoke nights with, and can’t wait to meet again on either one of our turfs. And yea, all my Filipino, Dutch, French, German, Bangladeshi, Georgian and even American friends are nice too :P

[trendingnewsb]

A Dull Resume Can Kill Your Job Chances, Here's How You Can Write an Appealing One

Fun fact: Recruiters take only 6 seconds to view a resume, according to The Ladders[1]. In other words, to further show how you’re a strong candidate of your dream job, first you can’t fail to impress the recruiters with your resume in 6 seconds. So, think twice before you insert a dense block of words. Leave aside any irrelevant visuals. Still confused? Here, we will show you what to do to stand out from your competitors.

We Think It’s Good to Write Our Resumes in These Ways (But Actually It’s Not…)

The More, The Better

It is common for us to think the best way to impress the recruiters is listing all our accomplishments in life. So we select the narrowest margin and the smallest font size. We just try every possible way to put everything about ourselves in our resumes. Well, it may sound bit dramatic but the fact is more doesn’t mean better.

As suggested by J.T. O’Donnell, author of the book Careerealism: The Smart Approach to a Satisfying Career, it is an EPIC FAIL to get everything to fit on one page.

Myth of “Reference Upon Request”

We should sound polite and humble in the resume and we are well aware of it. That’s why most of us put “Reference upon request” in our resumes. But if the employers are curious about your references, they will look for them themselves. To be frank, it is a waste of space to put these words at the very end.

Irrelevant Working Experience

Just imagine you’re now applying for the post of auditor and under “Working Experience” you write “Employee of the Month at Cafe ABC”. Will this earn bonus marks for you? Not really.

While we think the recruiters would favour the candidates with more working experience, from their perspective, they may wonder if you’re creating a general template for the application of different kinds of jobs, and even question your sincerity and ability.

Never Underestimate the Power of Your One-Page Resume

Resumes determine your chance to be selected for interviews. There are a number of qualities employers are looking at in your resume. Education Background. Working Experience. Achievements. But what do all these mean to them?

Introduce you a key term: Employability. Employability is more than ability, competence and skills. And your resume reflects your employability.

It’s not a rare case that when two people with highly similar qualifications apply for a position, only one of them is selected to attend the interview. It’s how they present their qualification in their resumes that makes the difference!

A well-written resume can let the employers know you are the one they are looking for, rather than you are just one of the hundreds qualified for the job.

Resume demonstrates your written and presentation skills. Whether you can describe yourselves in a concise, organised yet impressive way can tell a lot more than the qualifications you have. This is part of what an employer will look at, and you may not even notice that.

6 Elements that Form the Killer Formula of Your Resume

1. Quantify Your Achievements

How? Describe your achievements in numbers, instead of words. And it’s not about how many points you include, but how the numbers reflect your contribution in your previous jobs.

Why? Only you know how much you achieve in your previous jobs. It’s difficult for recruiters to find it themselves. Thus, do them a favour by providing the figures and numbers that quantify your previous achievements. This is definitely better than recounting the job responsibilities of your previous jobs.

Example Mention the exact number of participants in the event your held. Or the amount of money involved in the campaign. If you are applying for a marketing position, talk about the view count of the project instead of vague and general expressions like “excellent reception”.

2. Properly Use the Magical Buzzwords

How? You can actually do a little trick to impress your employer by the use of buzz words. Do a short research in advance before submitting your resume.

Check out the words that appear the most in the company’s description, vision or mission. And then use these words to replace the stock phrases in your resume.

Why? Ever heard of like-attracts-like theory[2]? Using words that they like to use can greatly arouse their interest on you as they think you share similar beliefs with them. Although you only change a few words on your resume, your odds of getting an interview may increase a lot.

Example Understand the company’s values and include similar ideas in your self-description to show you’re a potential best fit for the organization.

Besides, buzzword techniques can be used in different fields. While applying for a marketing position, use field-specific words like “marketed” and “promoted” to demonstrate your marketing sense.

There are always words that are specifically used in certain fields. Playing a tiny word game may win you a ticket to the interview!

3. Associate Yourself with Big Names

How? If, by any chance, you have collaborated with any big brands (even with the slightest connection), put those names on your resume!

Why? It’s the power of authority. Your credibility and competence are immediately boosted when you are connected with a big name.

According to Cialdini’s principles of persuasion[3], people respect authority and would follow their lead. Associating yourself with big names can work as a proof of your capability.

Example Is any client of your campaign a world-renowned brand? Is the sponsor of your scholarship a big name? Is your publication featured in any popular media? If your answer to any of these questions is yes, don’t hesitate to put the names on your resume. You won’t believe how much it helps to boost your credibility.

4. Provide Description of Where You Worked Before

How? Sometimes, the recruiters may be unfamiliar with your old companies. Why don’t you offer a helping hand instead of having them look for the information themselves? Write a neat and concise description of your previous companies and spare the work for the recruiters.

Why? The title “Manager” can mean a lot differently in a large company and a small one. Employers are curious about the nature of your previous companies to know more about your working background and the work you were involved. Besides, it shows you are detail-minded and consider the needs of the readers of your resume.

Example Simply go to the “About Us” of the home page of your previous workplace and rephrase one or two lines from it. This will do the work.

5. Use Bullet-point Instead of Text Blocks

How? List your job duties in points instead of in paragraphs. Moreover, it is also nice to limit your number of points to 2-5. Only keep the important and relevant information on your resume.

Why? Still remember the 6-second rule? Within this limited period of time, it is impossible for the recruiters to grasp the gist of your resume from your sea of words. Making your resume too wordy actually affects its readability.

Example

WRONG – “I worked as the Public Relations Manager at Company ABC during the period X Aug 20XX to X Mar 20XX. I was responsible for handling public correspondences. I was involved in a campaign in collaboration with the …”

GOOD – “Public Relations Manager, Company ABC X Aug 20XX – X Mar 20XX

– Handling public correspondences

– Involved in a campaign in collaboration with the …”

6. Make Use of Space and Formatting to Draw Attention

How? There is always something you want the recruiters to focus more. A carefully planned layout can draw their attention to the points you want to highlight. Leave some space around the important points.

Why? We all know recruiters won’t spend much time on reading a resume. And they may feel numb after reading hundreds of similar resumes. So keep yours pleasant to read and feed the recruiters with the most valuable information. Don’t waste their time and they will reward you with what you deserve.

Example Prioritise information based on their relevance and noteworthiness. Leave the less crucial and conspicuous information at the later part of your resume. Proper formatting can also help highlight the important points. It can be done by italicising or bolding certain words. Did you pay more attention to the words with formatting in this article? Apply the techniques in your resume and see how they work then.

Nice Resume Examples

Lastly, we’ve prepared some good resume templates for you to follow. If you are struggling hard to begin, it may be the ideal place for you.

Credits to: AGCareers

Note the use of quantification of achievements and bullet-points.

Credits: BusinessInsider

Reference

[1]^The Ladders: Keeping an eye on recruiter behavior[2]^Daily Mail: Opposites DON’T attract: We’re more drawn to like-minded people and couples with similar interests stay together longer[3]^eBrand Media: Dr. Robert Cialdini and 6 principles of persuasion

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from Viral News HQ http://ift.tt/2pjlsk2 via Viral News HQ

[trendingnewsb]

A Dull Resume Can Kill Your Job Chances, Here's How You Can Write an Appealing One

Fun fact: Recruiters take only 6 seconds to view a resume, according to The Ladders[1]. In other words, to further show how you’re a strong candidate of your dream job, first you can’t fail to impress the recruiters with your resume in 6 seconds. So, think twice before you insert a dense block of words. Leave aside any irrelevant visuals. Still confused? Here, we will show you what to do to stand out from your competitors.

We Think It’s Good to Write Our Resumes in These Ways (But Actually It’s Not…)

The More, The Better

It is common for us to think the best way to impress the recruiters is listing all our accomplishments in life. So we select the narrowest margin and the smallest font size. We just try every possible way to put everything about ourselves in our resumes. Well, it may sound bit dramatic but the fact is more doesn’t mean better.

As suggested by J.T. O’Donnell, author of the book Careerealism: The Smart Approach to a Satisfying Career, it is an EPIC FAIL to get everything to fit on one page.

Myth of “Reference Upon Request”

We should sound polite and humble in the resume and we are well aware of it. That’s why most of us put “Reference upon request” in our resumes. But if the employers are curious about your references, they will look for them themselves. To be frank, it is a waste of space to put these words at the very end.

Irrelevant Working Experience

Just imagine you’re now applying for the post of auditor and under “Working Experience” you write “Employee of the Month at Cafe ABC”. Will this earn bonus marks for you? Not really.

While we think the recruiters would favour the candidates with more working experience, from their perspective, they may wonder if you’re creating a general template for the application of different kinds of jobs, and even question your sincerity and ability.

Never Underestimate the Power of Your One-Page Resume

Resumes determine your chance to be selected for interviews. There are a number of qualities employers are looking at in your resume. Education Background. Working Experience. Achievements. But what do all these mean to them?

Introduce you a key term: Employability. Employability is more than ability, competence and skills. And your resume reflects your employability.

It’s not a rare case that when two people with highly similar qualifications apply for a position, only one of them is selected to attend the interview. It’s how they present their qualification in their resumes that makes the difference!

A well-written resume can let the employers know you are the one they are looking for, rather than you are just one of the hundreds qualified for the job.

Resume demonstrates your written and presentation skills. Whether you can describe yourselves in a concise, organised yet impressive way can tell a lot more than the qualifications you have. This is part of what an employer will look at, and you may not even notice that.

6 Elements that Form the Killer Formula of Your Resume

1. Quantify Your Achievements

How? Describe your achievements in numbers, instead of words. And it’s not about how many points you include, but how the numbers reflect your contribution in your previous jobs.

Why? Only you know how much you achieve in your previous jobs. It’s difficult for recruiters to find it themselves. Thus, do them a favour by providing the figures and numbers that quantify your previous achievements. This is definitely better than recounting the job responsibilities of your previous jobs.

Example Mention the exact number of participants in the event your held. Or the amount of money involved in the campaign. If you are applying for a marketing position, talk about the view count of the project instead of vague and general expressions like “excellent reception”.

2. Properly Use the Magical Buzzwords

How? You can actually do a little trick to impress your employer by the use of buzz words. Do a short research in advance before submitting your resume.

Check out the words that appear the most in the company’s description, vision or mission. And then use these words to replace the stock phrases in your resume.

Why? Ever heard of like-attracts-like theory[2]? Using words that they like to use can greatly arouse their interest on you as they think you share similar beliefs with them. Although you only change a few words on your resume, your odds of getting an interview may increase a lot.

Example Understand the company’s values and include similar ideas in your self-description to show you’re a potential best fit for the organization.

Besides, buzzword techniques can be used in different fields. While applying for a marketing position, use field-specific words like “marketed” and “promoted” to demonstrate your marketing sense.

There are always words that are specifically used in certain fields. Playing a tiny word game may win you a ticket to the interview!

3. Associate Yourself with Big Names

How? If, by any chance, you have collaborated with any big brands (even with the slightest connection), put those names on your resume!

Why? It’s the power of authority. Your credibility and competence are immediately boosted when you are connected with a big name.

According to Cialdini’s principles of persuasion[3], people respect authority and would follow their lead. Associating yourself with big names can work as a proof of your capability.

Example Is any client of your campaign a world-renowned brand? Is the sponsor of your scholarship a big name? Is your publication featured in any popular media? If your answer to any of these questions is yes, don’t hesitate to put the names on your resume. You won’t believe how much it helps to boost your credibility.

4. Provide Description of Where You Worked Before

How? Sometimes, the recruiters may be unfamiliar with your old companies. Why don’t you offer a helping hand instead of having them look for the information themselves? Write a neat and concise description of your previous companies and spare the work for the recruiters.

Why? The title “Manager” can mean a lot differently in a large company and a small one. Employers are curious about the nature of your previous companies to know more about your working background and the work you were involved. Besides, it shows you are detail-minded and consider the needs of the readers of your resume.

Example Simply go to the “About Us” of the home page of your previous workplace and rephrase one or two lines from it. This will do the work.

5. Use Bullet-point Instead of Text Blocks

How? List your job duties in points instead of in paragraphs. Moreover, it is also nice to limit your number of points to 2-5. Only keep the important and relevant information on your resume.

Why? Still remember the 6-second rule? Within this limited period of time, it is impossible for the recruiters to grasp the gist of your resume from your sea of words. Making your resume too wordy actually affects its readability.

Example

WRONG – “I worked as the Public Relations Manager at Company ABC during the period X Aug 20XX to X Mar 20XX. I was responsible for handling public correspondences. I was involved in a campaign in collaboration with the …”

GOOD – “Public Relations Manager, Company ABC X Aug 20XX – X Mar 20XX

– Handling public correspondences

– Involved in a campaign in collaboration with the …”

6. Make Use of Space and Formatting to Draw Attention

How? There is always something you want the recruiters to focus more. A carefully planned layout can draw their attention to the points you want to highlight. Leave some space around the important points.

Why? We all know recruiters won’t spend much time on reading a resume. And they may feel numb after reading hundreds of similar resumes. So keep yours pleasant to read and feed the recruiters with the most valuable information. Don’t waste their time and they will reward you with what you deserve.

Example Prioritise information based on their relevance and noteworthiness. Leave the less crucial and conspicuous information at the later part of your resume. Proper formatting can also help highlight the important points. It can be done by italicising or bolding certain words. Did you pay more attention to the words with formatting in this article? Apply the techniques in your resume and see how they work then.

Nice Resume Examples

Lastly, we’ve prepared some good resume templates for you to follow. If you are struggling hard to begin, it may be the ideal place for you.

Credits to: AGCareers

Note the use of quantification of achievements and bullet-points.

Credits: BusinessInsider

Reference

[1]^The Ladders: Keeping an eye on recruiter behavior[2]^Daily Mail: Opposites DON’T attract: We’re more drawn to like-minded people and couples with similar interests stay together longer[3]^eBrand Media: Dr. Robert Cialdini and 6 principles of persuasion

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