#i am often in some sort of agony. Miseries even. Perhaps even torment and hardships
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i am going to be so vulnerable in public for just a second. literally just for lack of therapy and for the love of psuedoanonymity except. it isn't really
#vwoop.noises#It sucks so bad being so volatile#Like I present myself very chill and unbothered but this is. Ahem. A Constructed Persona#Which is like. That's the point + the point of self improvement + I have some feelings on masking#Bc like. Idk. Some of the mental illness masking is just Uhhh trying to be a better person. That's not so bad#It's work and taxing but everything is. If I can't get storebought emotional regulation whatever I've whipped up here is generally passable#But man. It sucks so so so bad#I don't know when I'm allowed to feel bad#Well. I'm pretty okay at Feeling whatever but when I'm allowed to like... Make it other peoples proboems#One would say. I feel what I am feeling A Bit Too Much. All of the time#Just sucks! There's been some headway to at least get to the point where it is Just a me problem#And nobody else has gotta. Yknow. Be subject. but like. eeeeeugh#i am often in some sort of agony. Miseries even. Perhaps even torment and hardships#Eh. It's all just cause y'know. Illness. I don't know. I don't know how to conclude this. The point of the matter wasn't really addressed#I'd like to stop having anger issues this would probably help. It's not even anger issues proper cause it doesn't really. Present like that.#Well. Specifics would be [HORRIBLY STIGMATIZED DISORDER] but I have reservations leading with this because you know. We live in a society
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