#i cant type i should go to sleep | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tryingoutsol · 2 years

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god, I wish I was religious because boy do I need something to believe in

#i cant be Christian because i have beef with god and Jesus and everything else #for many reasons i cant belive in any organizatied religions #i cant type i should go to sleep

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cashmere-caveman · 3 months

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image descriptions in Alt

#hotd #alicent hightower #rhaenyra targaryen #house of the dragon #do you see the vision. originally this was just the meal and vaemons body from 1.08 w perhaps the world ends here but then #i started thinking so now we have this and idk how coherent it is but its so funny how in the beginning i was like #ooh this is gonna be a fun short webweave for once except now i really had to watch out to not run out of slots and i used the full 30 #picture limit tumblr has on photo posts. if any image looks fucked its either bc of tumblr compression or bc i cba to brighten them rn #i already spent one and a half hour typing out all the alt text theres a limit to my patience rip #anyway i only used two (2) hanif abdurraqib poems. i tried to be reasonable o7 but yeah do u see the vision. do u Get It!!!#bc i cant articulate it myself. thus this whole thing #anyway fuck let me add the bjsiness tags and then go to sleep its past midnight i need to get up early tomorrow i am fucked <333 #thers other ppl here too but idk. should i tag the king. yea cmon #viserys targaryen #post w a target audience of 1.5 people 😌🙏#as usual making this has driven me insane i needed to exorcise this post like its a demon and im the pope #have at it! goodnight #caveweb #cavetext

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hecksupremechips · 2 months

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My madoka magica hot take is I like sayaka/kyoko as a ship more than madoka/homura

#madoka magica #both ships are very very good and make me feral but god kyoko/sayaka really caters to me #i am biased cuz sayaka is my favorite character lol and i just want good things for her #but i mean we get them as enemies fighting to the death obsessively like sayaka gets so focused on proving herself to kyoko she cant think #of anything else and she wastes her energy fighting her instead of witches and just the foil like #both used their wish to grant something for someone else and kyoko lost everything as a result and decided that nothing good will ever come #of helping others so she should only look after number one and of course shed think that cuz shes all she has left #meanwhile sayaka refuses to take care of herself because she never wants others to suffer so she only exists for others #and both of them change their perspectives in pursuit of each other theyre literally red and blue #and i love seeing the development of their relationship and kyokos feelings i love her offering to kill ryosuke for sayaka #and how terrified she is in that moment when she sees sayakas lifeless body separated from the soul gem #or how she shares her story and remembers why she started fighting because of sayaka and fucking #THE WAY SHE ACTS SELFLESSLY AND STUPIDLY OPTIMISTIC TO SAVE SAYAKA FROM HER WITCH FOR #THE WAY SHE SACRIFICES HERSELF TO CONNECT WITH HER THE LOVE SONG #THEM HOLDING HANDS WHILE SAYAKA CRIES AND KYOKO IS THERE FOR HER AND THEY UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER SO WELL #god fucking dammit these fucking gay people are ruining my sleep #yeah idk if its obvious but i have a specific type when it comes to ships i love when characters beat each other up and are the center of #each others motivations and go through the horrors together and come out the other side and love each other deeply #love each others flaws and theres understanding and tenderness #i haaaave to draw them but i also have to draw a lot of blorbos rn alkksk

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rouge-the-bat · 2 months

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need kurama to be gay yearning and staying up way too late doing homework bc he spent too much time with hiei (knew he was managing his time badly but decided it was totally worth the lack of sleep so he could have fun with his crush. he can allow himself a normal teenager moment sometimes).

and in his sleepy delirious gay longing he becomes fixated on hiei taking his last name once theyre together. and cant get it out of his head. so he allows himself another stereotypical teenager moment and writes "hiei minamino" and their names together surrounded by a bunch of hearts over and over in his notebook. before he proceeds to pass out on his desk. with said notebook with obvious gay writings still open.

luckily for him, hiei didnt show back up in the middle of the night and see it.

but- his mom wakes up in the middle of the night, and decides to go check on him since she knows he was staying up late working by the time she went to bed. and when she finds her poor son has overworked himself and fell asleep on his desk (again), of COURSE shes going to come over to usher him to bed. and when the desk light is perfectly illuminating his notebook covered in hearts right beside his head, its hard to not take notice of it, or that it clearly reveals her son has a crush on his little friend he spends so much time with

#kurama #hiei #kurahi #youko kurama #shuichi minamino #shiori minamino #shiori hatanaka #yyh #yu yu hakusho #shiori proceeds to have a crisis bc. should she talk with him about it?#wait until hes comfortable opening up about it bc she accidentally peeked on his private writings (even if he accidentally left it open)?#but what if hes worried she wont accept him for it? she doesnt want her son to EVER worry about something like that!#her love is unconditional and she cant let him worry that it may be otherwise!!#then theres also how she suspected before but now knows for sure that hes gay #and the fretting about what if he encounters some bigots at some point #but then she also pictures seeing her dear shuichi off as he heads out on a date with hiei and how ADORABLE theyd be together 🥺#and wonders. are they already dating? is this a crush?#if theyre not dating yet she is ABSOLUTELY going to have to do encourage them to get together #she just wants to see her son and his friend happy together 🥺#also typed out this post when i couldnt sleep this morning so. if theres any weirdness to the way its typed thats why 👍

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todayisafridaynight · 10 months

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cant stress how obsessed i am with yamaguchis shirt

#snap chats #this is rgg related because i said so shut up ANYWAY #i DID steal this from twitter but i need to share it every with everyone so im not sorry #the person i stole this from rt'd a photoset from themselves and in it motomiya wearing The Silliest outfit ever #but ive already shared too much. ive already gone off topic too much we're moving on #i will bookmark it tho cause it makin me giggle #anyway if you cant read it. and id be so happy to type out what it says.#it says 'can't miss it!! you've got to go to nepal they have a big festival called Maha Shivaratri full moon night in february'#dont know why it makes me giggle it just does. like fuck man maybe i SHOULD go to nepal in february <- maha shivaratri is in march next yea #anyway everyone be nice to me today i have a spanish exam later and it Should be easy #but i was fighting god and the devil last night trying to sleep because my cramps decided to kick my ass EXTRA hard #I NEVER GET BAD CRAMPS WHYYYY DID IT HAVE TO BE BEFRE AN EXAM WHEN I NEED GOOD SLEEP !!!!!!#im lucky my spanish class is in the evening but god it was so painful #the last time i experienced pain as bad as that was when i was trying to sleep after busting my wrist #so awful.... i hurt a lil now but i'll get through it #ok bye let me study up just to reaffirm some Spanish Knowledge with myself

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aceofstars0 · 10 months

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May or may not have finished my secret santa drawing in one day...

Have a sneaky peak ;)

So tempted to tag the person...

#i should have done my homework #banking on no one finding out who i have #demon slayer oc #my art #secret santa #i ADORE the hair in thid one <3 #probably shouldve posted the hair cuz its a little? lesd identifiyable #spelling ugh #im going to sleep noe #i literally cant type

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dragons-and-yellow-roses · 1 month

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Sat down to write (it's 1:40am, I should be asleep) for the first time in almost a year because I very suddenly got the motivation, I sat down in front of a blank document and just thought, "Huh. How do you write?" (I used to think I was going to do this as a career)

#no truly i sat down and thought 'how does a story start? how do you write?'#i havent written since last november and even then it wasnt much #i was talking to my gf about ghosts (long story but i love her she gave me ghosts) and then all of a sudden i needed to write #the writing is about dead kids so i see where my brain made the connection but idk why it decided now was the time to start on it again #i am so tired i feel delirious and typing coherently is near impossible #i should sleep. the writing doesnt feel particularly amazing right now but i know in the morning it will seem so much worse #but you cant edit a blank page (i got that quote from a tumblr post like two days ago and it hasnt left my brain)#this story has lived rent free inside my brain for like six years im going to fucking get it out if its the last thing i do #i just need to figure it out. and write it well. figuring it out is the big hurdle. writing it is the next. but ill get there

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xannerz · 10 months

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roblox death noise

#vigo's pancreatitis is better now btw #he's bounced back really well and i cannot overstate my relief #but the entire ordeal and vet bill broke me #*i* haven't bounced back from it #like i've already been shouldering a lot and that made me snap lmfao #so i've just been like moseying along day to day waiting for the evening so i can go back to sleep #talking takes too much energy. so does just. yk. emoting like an average ass person lmao #i feel like terrible company. idk #cant draw cant write cant exercise can barely walk my dog #and i hate it b/c it feels like i'm fishing for excuses #ive had therapists tell me i'm very self-aware and i dont mean that in a 'i got a good grade in therapy' type of way LMAO #but in the 'if i know then i know then why am i here spinning my wheels and boohooing' type of way #like despite my own bad habits i wanna consider myself a person who has at least some hope and ambition #but i've just been super like done. lmaoo #but lately i just cant. i cannot envision a future for myself. not w/ the way things are.#these are things that *should* be independent of me but aren't. so i get roped into taking care of things.#over and over and over and over again. for over 10 years LMFAO #anyway i'm just vaguely whining no advice is being requested ty : )#xangoeswah

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indecisive-dizzy · 4 months

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I feel like I'm slowly being dragged back into my (dreamworks) Trolls era,,,

it won't last long knowing me and wh but I feel an intermission coming lol

#it wont last long lol #wh has me in a death grip I'm not going Anywhere #especially since my pins are the way! dunno if anyone else's have shipped but mine haaavveee #cant wait for the barnaby plush to ship next sigh #typing out loud #i should really be sleeping edition

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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year

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...

#so i survived my 1st week as a phd student. it's interesting. im not sure how i feel #the negatives are that i forgot how much stress being around people causes me. as a research assistant i was able to be on my own schedule #and go into the lab at odd hours so i never had to see anyone. but now im in classes and teaching and have a shared office #classes are tolerable stress wise so long as im sitting on an edge. i only feel a lil like im dying. teaching makes nauseous beforehand.#which is odd bc im not really worried while im doing it or before im doing it. i thibk its just that i have to interact ans i kno im a #mediocre teacher bc id rather die than do the back and forth of asking questions and u should teach interactively #i like to break down complex idea and help people with problems but i was not build to teach in classrooms. i get knocked off points when #i give class presentations bc i cant make eye contact lol. so that'll b annoying this semester. and its just so hard to function in an #office space. idk its weird like i dont even feel it that much while im there its just like a flashing *i need to leave* alarm. and then #when im alone its like a physical weight off of me. and i cant tell if thats what's draining my energy or if ive just cycled into a low #energy lul bc im just like. i wanna sleep. and for me thats always a sign that somethings wrong. i dont feel that bad mood wise but its #like there's a rock weighing me down as im trying to tread water. so those r the big negatives. the positives r that #i do enjoy being back in school. i love the structure of it. but im also self destructive abt structure so well see how it goes. but my #lab mates seem nice as does my advisor. i feel a bit bad bc ill have to learn genome stuff from the ground up. and today i was trying to #convey ideas to him like an insane person. bc i dont have enough background to talk fluidly abt my prospective project and i have a picture #of what i mean but not all the details. hopefully i made some sense. i think the idea is cool. and thats the other really positive thing.#the papers i have to read associated with this project r waaaaaaaaaay more interesting than anything i ever had to read for my masters. like #they're the types of papers i would force other ppl to read for lab meetings. so im optimistic abt not hating it by the end haha #yay for being excited abt science. but i guess thats the other thing i feel bad abt. like im interested but haven't read a lot to prep bc #i cant express how difficult dyslexia makes things but also i cant control how interested in things i get so i bassically banned myself #from reading papers im actually interested in like 3 years ago bc in retrospect i was prob going thru a hypomanic episode #and i was like reading papers abt microbes in Antarctica all day and not working on my stuff. and i just remember walking into the lab at #like 5am to trasfer alage with tears streaming down my face bc i was just like. i cant have this nice thing and b functional. it has to stop #so i just created this weird barrier in my mind where im not allowed to read fun papers. so its odd to b reading them now for work. its odd #also i was walking to my office worring abt things and then i saw some moss growinf around the edge of the sidewalk and it made me wanna cry #bc i am an extremely normal individual. i have normal feelings abt photosynthesis. but anyway yeah. its been interesting #hopefully ill stay optimistic. next week we have a orientation for new grad students. and i might have to drive like an hr away. hate that #the driving i mean. not the orientation. that should b fun #unrelated

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mr-valden · 9 months

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The kind of mood where I paint realistic angst of characters that don't even belong to me

#6 hours in so far #coping with the delulu or smt of the sorts #coping might have backfired #coping with trauma by just pushing it onto characters #than it comes back to haunt me and I just cant let go #its silly tho #I might be insane #should probs mention this to my therapist #she'll blame this on the fact that I barely ever sleep tho #ohwell #typing so hard that I didnt notice that the whole time words words words was playing in the background #silly #this probs counts as a vent #i do sincerely apologise #i have officialy lost my mind

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lauriel816 · 1 year

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I never get it how some of you guys could fall asleep in 5mins. Are you even real humans?

#like how #I closed my eyes and then I had this weird hc in my head going for a while I opened my eyes it was half an hour later #I mean I just closed my eyes for a glimpse of a second #time feels unreal when you are trying to get some sleep #what should I call this #sleep thoughts #but I’m very much awake when I type it down #look what sleep deprivation has got me #and I cant even call it sleep deprivation bcs I don’t rly feel it that way #like my eyes need a rest but my brain…#have you seen anyone desperate for some sleep but at the same time got this urge to walk around doing meaningless stuff like doing dishes #or clean up the hob #I wonder if the symptoms of sleep deprivation include rambling #in that case yeah im probably sleep deprived #personal

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squicksquak · 1 year

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never feel bad about having an attitude with annoying men they need their egos brought down a little, they don't feel bad about being a bitch so why should you?

#“rant in the tags srry”#texting me at 11.30pm asking me to come over to a party when i told him two days b4 i couldnt make it #'im tired' 'we have energisers' get the fuck out of here i said no #im not gonna leave my house at this hour to go spend time with a bunch of guys i don't like to watch fucking anime #esp when this guy texting likes me like #i do not need you trying to get with me girl i know where you keep your cutlery #i have a shit ton to say ab this guy but im tired of typing anyway #if u think im gonna miss on sleep to go watch anime with a bunch of annoying 17-19yr olds youre fucking crazy #i think he thinks i like him back even tho ive told him a million times i dont see him like that #need this man to shut the fuck up for real #n the emojis he sends are so fucking cringe gtfo of here i send a rolling eye emo and he goes 😬#like yeah you should be 😬 - ing i told you i cant come and here u are texting me at ELEVEN THIRTY #asking me to come over #fuck off

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devildairymilkfairy · 1 year

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#man im really tired of having feelings for him. i should really just keep my distance and go back to dating apps #i long for the connection we have and hate having to build up something brand new #but im really tired of feeling butt hurt everytime he sleeps with our roommate #like yeah we broke up over a year ago. and still casually do shuff. its just hard for me to turn off that side of my brain #i just want to feel loved and be held by someone without having to build the foundation all over again #ive been depressed the past few days because of it. i act irrationally and cant control my feelings #overall its better if i just let them fuck around and i try to find someone new. only problem is im anxious and not a good conversationalist #plus i hate messaging people over phone. too much anxiety abt what im saying and if the other person enjoys me or not #anyways it sucks seeing the subtle evidence that they went at it while i was away. i have no right to be upset but i cant help but think of #him as more than a friend. i cant and shouldnt but we had dated 6 years previously. its a bit difficult to turn that switch off now #dammit i guess tonight im gonna sleep alone again and try not to cry. whatever gotta get over myself and move on. have to stop only thinking #of my self and being so damn possessive all the time #ash rambles #fuck i feel worse now after typing all that out yippee..

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thatdemiboymess · 2 months

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Desperately holding myself back from cutting my own hair by putting it in a ponytail (again) or just buzzing it all off (again) in a fit of desperation and hysteria because ideally I'd really like to get a cool haircut that I'd actually like. But also. I am losing my fucking mind. And every day I am forced to reckon with the fact that I'm probably not gonna get a chance to go outside and get it cut professionally any time soon and especially not before I seriously just can't take this anymore. Woe, I guess. As all things seem to be.

#fae irl #had to go sit myself down at my desk because one second i was just sitting there and the next i was putting my hair up in a ponytail #and getting ready to lop it off once again #stared at myself in the mirror with shaking hands in the pink lights and had to remind myself how stupid it looks whenever i do this lolol #i am clenching my phone so tightly and biting the inside of my mouth with churning guts while i type this #i hate hate hate hate when my hair gets this long but i havent been able to get it cut and i want to get it cut because this is driving me #up the fucking wall but i cant leave and the hair cutting place is so far away and i cant get anywhere i cant leave and i dont want to be a #bother pleading to go get it cut when were tight on money and dont jave transportation of our own and he needs to sleep for work and he #barely gets time to do what he wants to do either so i should really be able to just suck it up and deal with it right?????????????????????#but i cant look in the mirror and its impacting me its impacting me so bad #im almost crying rn lolol #better stop gotta stop being such a fucking crybaby #ohhhhh how horrible your hair is getting loooong ohhh like thats the worst thing in the fucking world fucking whiny bothersome little baby #hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh #im. losing my fucking marbles.

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toastsnaffler · 2 months

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had a very weird dream the place I worked was in the marine exploration industry and I was presenting a review of a deep sea probe we were retiring and then woke up extremely abruptly bc my body started digging my uterus out with a million tiny blunt spoons YOWIEEEEOWWW

#fuckinghellllll this pain is smth else entirely. trying to be normal abt it bc its 2am and im so tired please let me go back to sleep #filled a hot water bottle so now we wait for that to do its thing and ill take some ibuprofen #ohhhhh just realised i only have 3 ibuprofen capsules left. and a full day of work in 6 hours... chuckles. im in danger ahahaa #fuck me okay ill get up half an hour earlier and go to tesco before i get my bus i think it opens 7am so should just be able to make it #i take it back abt that organ post can i get my reproductive system removed 🥹🥹🥹🥹#it has no right being this bad im not in FUCKING labour GET A GRIP!!!!!#grabbing my tubes and shaking them and shaking them and yanking them out #swear i had more ibuprofen than this where the fuck is it.#so annoying the premier near my work doesnt open until 8:15 bc thats exactly when my shift starts 🙃🙃🙃🙃#wait maybe theres a tesco nearby nvm nah just google mapsed and its barren around there #so i have to go before i get my bus. okay okay thats fine. setting my alarm for 6am. its that or killing myself #it has been. half an hour now is it going to lessen!!!!!!#JUST FOUND ANOTHER PACK IN MY BAG BUT ITS EMPTY THIS IS SO CRUEL......#okay. sorry this is so disjointed im clawjnf at the walls and then i come bacm and type another tag and then i claw some more #im gonna refill my hot water bottle and please let me sleep please i cant do work on so little and also in so much pain #jesus ill see how i feel when i wake up again maybe i should call in sick #so devastating i cant take codeine on these meds bc that was the only thing that helped :-( i need to ask if there are alternatives #or maybe i should go med free while im on my period so i can take it. but idk how long it has to be out of my system to be safe #and i dont want withdrawal ughhhhhh #hate usinf a hot water bottle during the summer its too warm for this. miserable. wait i should dm my flatmate if she can spare a little #ik n she might need it to take on holiday but just enohgh for today would be so good wah #and then i dont have to leave.so super early #okay ill do that then putting phone down so i can try sleeping even with pain pleaseplease #goodnight :-(#.diaries

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