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malfiora · 3 years

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Ship Ranker

I'm ranking my fleet of ships! The list will span fandoms, so bear with me and wave from the piers (or jump aboard 😏) while I organize my fangirl ravings into some semblance of order. Ranked from greatest to least, with honorable mentions.

Note: I use the words "pairing" and "ship" to differentiate two things. A "pairing" is a couple of characters with some canonical relationship (could be anything). A "ship" is a romantically or sexually involved couple that does not have to be canon.

The Fleet

Galleons (OTPs)

Yes, I know there's technically only supposed to be one ship that's your One True Pairing, but I've got several and choosing between them is like choosing my favorite child. (My list, my rules.)

1. Tendershipping or Stockholmshipping (Bakura Ryou/Yami Bakura, Yu-Gi-Oh)

This ship is divine. It really has it all -- gothic themes, horror elements, toxicity with the capacity for romance -- and has captivated me for as long as I've been a Yu-Gi-Oh fan. It's probably what influenced some of my more interesting predilections (coughcough number 13 cough).

2. USUK, Special Relationship, or Joker (America/Britain, Hetalia)

I mean, it's basically canon.

But pissing off antis aside, it's great seeing this relationship develop and witnessing them being really intimate (meaning knowing each other well, not the other thing) in the show/comics, so how could I not? Plus, as an American I'm all too familiar with the Special Relationship.

3. Spamano or SpeRo (Spain/Romano, Hetalia)

Ditto, number 2. Except this one might actually be canon. Seriously, I'm preeeeetty sure Himaruya & Co. have long since discovered the fandom's love for this ship and have peppered it as slight fanservice. (Exhibit A: the April Fool's Day OVA.) My favorite refrain when it comes to this ship is, "Could you really see them with anyone else?"

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Battleships (Top Ships)

Ships I'll fight for.

4. Bronzeshipping (Marik Ishtar/"Yami" Marik, Yu-Gi-Oh)

This ship haunts me. It's dark and lovely and the pairing deserved way more attention in the show. My love for this ship stems from the observation that Yami Marik was created expressly to comfort and protect his lighter half, and despite wanting to excise him later, he still tries to carry out Marik's plan (i.e. kill the Pharaoh) despite no longer having to. Methinks there's some subconscious need drawing them together, and I stan.

5. AmeriPan (America/Japan, Hetalia)

I've recently fallen for this one. It's fun to write, even more fun to read, because of the sliding spectrum from angsty to fluffy. It started with the series pairing them off to demonstrate their friendship, then a realization that they're the paragon of "opposites attract." A large part of my love comes from @heta too, so kudos.

6. Yoreki (Yogi/Gareki, Karneval)

C'mon, just look at them. They're in love, your honor.

On a serious note, the manga goes out of its way to demonstrate the growing bond between these boys to the point of having significant consequences for the plot (in other words, their friendship fucks and then unfucks a lot of stuff). Do I think Tōya will actually ship them? No, but I can dream.

7. Starshipping (Yuki Jaden or Judai/Fudo Yusei, Yu-Gi-Oh)

Speaking of dreaming, I don't even know if this ship is allowed because these characters have never canonically met. Still, within the context of Bonds Beyond Time alone, they make the perfect pair. I'd have watched the entire movie with just the two of them, or better yet, a buddy-cop, scifi, action-adventure, card-game-playing movie where they have to save the world before prom.

On a serious note, their personalities balance each other out perfectly, and as @entamewitchlulu expertly demonstrated in "Hourglass of Stars," they can even exorcise each other's demons.

8. Stein/Spirit (Soul Eater)

No one can convince me that these two didn't have some intimate relationship beyond friendship. At the very least, Stein is attached to Spirit, so much so that he anchors Stein in his bouts of Madness. Plus, they snap back into partnership far too easily for two people who spent any amount of time apart not thinking about each other. All of that with a potential for toxic romance? Sign me the fuck up.

And I can't pretend tastewithouttalent didn't utterly convince me of their own canon.

9. Klance/Leith (Keith/Lance, Voltron: Legendary Defender)

They're in love, your honor.

Once again, a series goes out of its way to explore an intimate relationship between two, like, really compatible characters. So how could I not? (Also Leith is a way better ship name.)

10. Drarry (Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Harry Potter)

Because I'm basic and love a good rivals/enemies to lovers trope. Plus the fanfic has matured and refined over the years.

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Cruise Liners (Fun Ships)

Ships that I ride for the hell of it.

11. Tokitatsu/Tsukitachi/Hirato/Akari (Karneval)

This is just pure joy. I love the idea of the two of the people Hirato finds most annoying hooking up and dragging him into it. Same goes for Akari. Plus, this foursome is made up of two quality pairings (Tsukitachi/Hirato and Akari/Tokitatsu) as well as fan favorite ship Hirato/Akari. So fun for the whole family.

12. Drinnarry (Draco Malfoy/Ginny Potter/Harry Potter, Harry Potter)

Speaking of poly ships, this new love of mine is inspired by Cursed Child. Because did you really think Ginny was going to let Draco be lonely? Plus, Drarry is always fun.

P. S. I'm very proud of that ship name I just created.

13. Genkaku/Nagi (Deadman Wonderland)

Flashback to when I said I loved toxic ships:

It really has it all -- gothic themes, horror elements, toxicity with the capacity for romance [...]

This one is pretty bad, and I know it, and I adore it. The penchant for violent, possessive "love" in literature and fandom resonates with a deep part of my soul, and Genkaku's obsession with Nagi fits perfectly, like a fishook in an eye.

14. Jay/Dick (Jason Todd/Dick Grayson, Batman)

This was the ship that made me break my incest rule (Incest Rule: Don't Ship It). Technically they're adopted so it isn't incestuous, but it still feels too close. Still, Jason and Dick are, like, really good foils of each other (intentionally so, DC didn't want a second Robin who was just like the first), which leads to fantastic angst, resentment, violence, and humor. Throw some sexual tension on top and you're ready to set sail.

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Tugboats (Necessary Ships)

Ships I need to survive but don't think about often.

15. Destiel (Dean Winchester/Castiel, Supernatural)

Canon? Either way, this pairing has a famously tortuous build up, and I fell for it. My love for it peaked in Season 7, when Dean throws the Connect Four game off the table because he has Had It and wants Cas back to normal. The look on Castiel's face 😩

16. Marie/Azusa (Soul Eater)

Azusa clearly has a thing for Marie, and you can't tell me otherwise. Besides, my Stein/Spirit ship works out a thousand times better if this ship sails.

17. Dick/Kory (Dick Grayson/Kory'andr, Teen Titans)

Ironically, I hated this pairing way back when (even as a Teen Titans cartoon fan) because I wanted Dick and Barbara to get back together. However, DC's live action show Titans showed me the error of my ways. Of course, now I'm stuck hoping they get (back) together in season 3.

18. Scorbus (Scorpius Malfoy/Albus Potter, The Cursed Child)

I saw Cursed Child and just, like, adopted this one. It's kinda like Spamano -- probably not intended by the creator but makes waaaay too much sense to unsee.

19. Cyclops/Rogue (Scott Summers/Rogue, X-Men Evolution)

Old but gold. Probably one of my first ships, and appropriately for one of my favorite shows growing up. (X-Men Ev is easily the best X-Men series, don't @ me.) That field trip episode did it for me, as we see them finally open up to and trust each other. It's also fun to think about Scott chasing good girl Jean while infatuated with bad girl Rogue. We love irony.

20. Nightcrawler/Scarlet Witch (Kurt Wagner/Wanda Maximoff, Wolverine and the X-Men)

This was an okay series with really interesting premises and adaptations, not least of which was Magneto's Genosha, a mutant-only island nation. Kurt and Wanda just hit it off in their episode and I wondered if they could have depended on each other during that rough time. Lo and behold, I found out much later that they have a child in an alternate timeline in the comics, so maybe this ship holds more than ballast.

21. KagSan (Kagome/Sango, InuYasha)

I got it in my head one day and now it won't leave. I don't prefer it to the canon ships, but it's nice to fantasize about.

22. Sookie Stackhouse/Eric Northman (True Blood)

Eric was my favorite vampire (closely followed by Pam), and his fascination in Sookie pressed all the right buttons. Imagine my delight when they finally hooked up, and then my dismay when Sookie subsequently swears off vampires.

23. Violetshipping, formerly known as Puppyshipping (Seto Kaiba/Joey Wheeler)

I hate that I love this ship so much, so bottom of the list it goes. Still, it was the first one for which I wrote fanfic, and this pairing is canonically significant to the themes of the series. And what lit critic can resist that pull?

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Ships in a Bottle (Honorable Mentions)

Ships I admire but don't actively write or read. These are not ranked.

Kim Possible/Shego (Kim Possible)

In other words, When I Should Have Known I Was Bi.

Daryl/Carol (The Walking Dead)

Spawned from their bonding during and after the search for Carol's daughter. They've been close ever since (at least through season 7, which is where I stopped watching).

Amexico (America/Mexico, Hetalia)

Yes, I made up this ship name, too. First off, Mexico deserves to be a country in the show (although they were named in an episode, and I suppose that's progress). Second, this one is weird because it involves my headcanon for Mexico: a passionate woman who won't back down from a challenge and has a love/hate relationship with America. They bicker and pretend to hate each other but need one another for commerce and are sometimes very similar.

Accelerator/Misaka, (A Certain Scientific Railgun/Magical Index)

Call me System of a Down, I love toxicity. This pairing in general has the potential for a good complex relationship that helps them both mature. And should I sprinkle some possessive romance in there on Accelerator's behalf, I'm sure you'll forgive me.

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And that's the fleet! So, are you ready to set sail with me? Or do you wanna see em sink?

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