#i even drank green tea afterwards! which... i think made that way worse

[aria0fgold]

Feeling... pretty not so good today... Like, yesterday my throat just started hurting and I couldn't sleep well at all and now it's still hurting a bit complete with a slight cold and a small headache and that's my cue to have a healthy routine until I feel better enough to continue with my day to day not so healthy routine.

[dreaming-about-fanfictions]

Love and Cat Pee - Leonard McCoy x Reader

Words: 1952 Pairing: Leonard McCoy x Reader Warnings: None, just a lot of fluff.

A/N: My Tag list is old. Please tell me, if you want to be removed! Some of you seem to have changed their usernames so I’m sorry if I didn’t tag you in this story. Tell me if you want to be added <3

Some days, being able to work on the Enterprise was the best thing that ever happened to you. You got to travel, see new planets, and meet people from all over the universe.

On other days, being able to work on the Enterprise made you wish you had stayed back on Earth in your hometown, working in your family’s little shop, instead of almost dying 200 light years away because you accidentally drank from a wrong glass.

Today was one of those days.

“Sit her down over there,” Captain Kirk ordered and two Security officers grabbed you under your arms, helping you sit down on a bench. “Kirk to Enterprise. Enterprise, please come in.”

“Enterprise. Scott here.” You heard a faint voice coming from Kirk’s communicator.

“Scotty, be prepared to beam Lieutenant Y/L/N up. And tell Doctor McCoy to get ready to treat a patient with Ladocsris poisoning.” After Mr. Scott acknowledged, he closed the communicator and looked down at you, frowning. “How are you feeling, Lieutenant?”

“Horrible, Captain” you managed to get out. You writhed in pain, arms tightly clutching to your side. It felt like someone had stabbed you with a burning hot knife right in your stomach and now continued to twist it around. “Am I dying?” you asked with gritted teeth.

Kirk shook his head. “You’re not going to die from this.” He suppressed a chuckle and shook his head. “Why the hell would you drink that, Lieutenant?”

“Certainly not because I wanted to spend my day in sickbay!” You wiped away sweat that had formed on your forehead. “Excuse me, Captain, but – fuck!” Another wave of pain washed over you.

The Enterprise had delivered some medical supplies to this planet and as a thank you, the crew was invited to join their Spring Festival. Because the ship was on a tight schedule, a landing party consisting of only six people beamed down to avoid coming across as disrespectful. At one point, you were all offered drinks. There were two different glasses on the table. You didn’t correctly understand which one you should take and since everyone was involved in conversations, you didn’t want to interrupt and ask. So you just took one.

Kirk looked at you sympathetically when you closed your eyes in pain. “Do you know what it was?”

“What?”

“The drink.”

“No, why?” You opened your eyes in suspicion.

“Well,” he looked down to hide the obvious amusement in his eyes. “They have this giant cat-like animal on the planet. It’s a sign of fertility because …. because its urine is basically the best fertilizer you can get.”

You stared at him, words slowly starting to make sense in your head.

After a few seconds, he continued. “Even though it’s not meant for drinking, they still collect it for their Spring Festival. It’s like a … religious thing.”

“You mean … You mean, I just drank …”

Kirk nodded.

What happened next was probably the worst thing you had experienced since the day you started working for Starfleet. You felt it coming up in your throat but it was too late - with a groan you leaned forward and vomited. All over your Captain.

***

When you woke up again, the pain was gone. It was replaced with a slight dizziness and a faint headache.

You tried to sit up, realizing you were in sickbay. Oh, you hated it here. That’s why you had become an expert of skipping annual exams and basically coming here at all. Not because you were afraid of them, no, that wasn’t it. Simply, because since day one you had the biggest crush possible on one particular Doctor – and you didn’t know how to deal with it. At all.

“Don’t get up just yet.”

Speaking of the devil.

Doctor McCoy appeared from behind a curtain. “How are you feeling?”

“Better,” you mumbled, avoiding eye contact. Of all the professionals working here, he had to treat you? “Just a headache.”

He nodded. “That’s normal. The heada-“

“Oh, she’s awake!” Christine Chapel interrupted. Apparently she was on the way somewhere, carrying various blood samples in her hands, on her face a big grin. “You’re feeling better?”

“Mhm,” you nodded, slightly confused.

“That’s good to hear!” The grin didn’t fade when she walked away.

Furrowing your eyebrow, you looked over to McCoy. He kept his eyes locked on a hypo in his hands but you didn’t miss the amused sparkle in his eyes.

“What is it?”

“Mh?” The doctor cleared his throat, injecting you with the hypo. “The headache should disappear within a few hours. I will keep you here for a bit longer and run another test but I believe you should be fine.”

Another nurse kept passing by, nodding at you with a big wide smile. Ignoring what McCoy had just said, you answered: “I’d like to think everyone is just really happy to see me here but I’m sensing it’s something different.”

“I don’t know, maybe it has to do with you vomiting all over our Captain,” McCoy said casually and shrugged. “Just an idea.”

Oh fuck, was the only thought running through your mind when you suddenly remembered.

“Ugh,” you let out a loud groan and dramatically placed your hand over your eyes. Why did those things always happen to you?

On the last mission, you had accidentally pushed Chekov into a lake with a reddish color which resulted in him having a weird rash all over his body for two weeks and red hair. Now you not only drank something you wasn’t supposed to and probably sabotaged the whole shore leave, you decided to throw up on Kirk afterwards.

“I sabotaged the whole mission,” you scolded. “Fuck!”

“Watch your language in my sickbay. I’m the only one allowed to curse here.” The doctor was still standing in front of you when you removed your hand from your eyes. “Now stop being so dramatic, that corn-fed goblin –“

“Corn-fed goblin?” You interrupted.

“Yes.”

“I thought it was green-blooded goblin and corn-fed idiot.”

“Sometimes I like to vary a little with my insults.” He gave you a half smile before continuing. “The Captain will be fine. Jim had worse things on his body than vomit. Believe me.”

You frowned. “Do I wanna know?”

“No.”

A sigh escaped your lips. “I still have to apologize though.”

“Probably.” He turned to his instruments, shuffling things a little while you stared at the ceiling. “The crew won’t let you live that down, be prepared for that.”

You made an indefinable sound.

“I won’t either.”

Great. As if the embarrassment hadn’t already reached its highest point for this month.

“One of the security guards has also the opinion that you could’ve turned away if you wanted to. Now people are wondering why you didn’t do it.”

“How do you even know so much gossip?”

He shrugged. “My nurses talk a lot.”

You shook your head in disbelief. “Why I did it?” You scoffed. “Oh I don’t fucking know – excuse my language – maybe because I felt like it. Or maybe it was just me trying to get here so I can confess my love to you!”

Doctor McCoy put down the instruments and turned around again. “Well, was it?”

Realizing what you had just said, you kept your eyes locked on the ceiling. “No!” You denied, with probably a bit too much force in your voice. “Of course not. I mean. No.” You felt heat rising to your cheeks.

“Right,” the man replied. You didn’t see the smile on his lips. “Maybe I’ll just let you rest for a while, alright?”

“Maybe my headache will actually disappear then, Doctor.”

He left with a chuckle.

***

You weren’t able to sleep after he had left, so for another hour you were just staring at the wall, listening to regular beeping noise coming from the instruments.

You weren’t sure which event of the day was the worst but the more time you were thinking about it, probably the latter. He knew. He wasn’t supposed to know but now he did and you a part of you was – aside from being embarrassed – terrified. Yes, you had a crush on him but it was the kind of crush where you just admired him from afar. Nothing would happen between the two of you. But now that it had slipped from your mouth, it was real.

“I brought you something.” The curtain got pulled away and McCoy came in.

Oh no.

You lifted your head from the pillow. He was holding a small cup, which he placed on the small table next to the bed. A delicious smell ascended from it.

“My favorite tea?” You asked him a bit puzzled.

“Yes,” he smiled at you.

“How do you know?”

“You always drink it.” He simply said.

“You noticed?” A warm feeling began to spread in your stomach.

The doctor nodded.

“Well, thank you.” You took a sip of the tea. It was still hot, but not hot enough to burn your tongue. Just perfect.

“So about earlier –“

You almost choked on the liquid. “Please, don’t. I’ve been humiliated enough for one day.”

“I know,” McCoy chuckled. “That’s why I wanted to ask –“

“What?”

“Damn, you really need to stop interrupting people.” He shook his head.

“Sorry, please finish,” you mumbled and lifted the cup to your lips again.

“I wanted to ask if you’d like to have dinner with me tomorrow. Dinner as in … a date.”

This time you choked for real. You started coughing and Leonard was luckily fast enough to get the cup from your hands before you spilled hot tea all over yourself.

“So is that a yes?” He asked when you calmed down and were able to breath normally again.

You stared at him with mixed emotions, not quite believing that Leonard McCoy actually asked you out. Goddamnit, you were acting like a lovestruck teenage girl not like a full grown human and Starfleet member. “Yes.”

“Fantastic!” There it was again – the smile that Leonard McCoy almost never showed. It lit up the whole room, you thought. “Normally I’d take it slow and wait for a few more days before doing what I’m about to do next but you have already confessed your love for me so –“

“Oh, please stop it!”

“– so there’s no real reason to wait,” he finished his sentence with a smile. McCoy took a step forward so that he was now standing directly next to your sickbed.

“Wait for what?” You asked furrowing your brows. He already asked you out on a date. There was really nothing more he could do to make this day any better.

Slowly Leonard leaned down towards you and before you realized what was happening, you felt his lips on yours. The kiss was slow and tender and made you feel dizzy. His lips were soft, much softer than expected, and you wanted to melt when you felt his hand cupping your cheek. Apparently there was something he could to make this day any better. Two seconds later, the kiss was over. Leonard pulled away and looked at you lovingly. You were out of breath.

Suddenly his smile vanished and he grimaced.

You felt your stomach plummet. What happened? Were you that bad? Did he already regret asking you out and kissing you? “Did I do something wrong?” You asked, your voice barely audible.

“No, no, darlin’,” he reassured her quickly and lifted his hand to his mouth. “The kiss was … something else.”

“But?”

“But I think I can still taste a hint of that cat pee drink on your lips.”

***

My Masterlist

Send me a message if you want to be added to or removed from the tag list! Tag list: @goingknowherewastaken , @waitingforthestarstofall , @imoutofmyvulcanmind , @whatif-animagineblog​ , @loverbug1123​ 

[thefinalcinderella]

Kaze ga Tsuyoku Fuiteiru Chapter 2 - The Mountains of Hakone are the Steepest in the World (Part 2)

Kiyose declaring that they’re aiming for Ekiden has the same energy as Kayoko (or rather, Keisuke) telling the MDC they’re aiming for the Olympics in DIVE!!

Full list of translations here

Translation Notes

1. Shiraae is a salad dressed with tofu, white sesame and white miso

2. Osechi is traditional New Year’s food stored in special boxes, you can read more about it here. Zouni is Japanese soup containing mochi and is strongly associated with New Year’s in Japan

Previous | Next

Entering April, the residents of Chikusei-sou suddenly became busy.

They had to frequently go to the university for orientation and course registration. Like bees riding on the spring breeze, they moved around without being able to stay still for even a moment. Every night from King’s room, there came the sound of him restlessly saying “Find a job, find a job” in his sleep, which could be heard all over Chikusei-sou. Yuki, who passed the bar exam last year, did not join any seminar and spent each night going around to clubs and immersing himself in a flood of music. Musa and Shindou, who were serious and went at their own pace, ignored their surroundings and immediately finished their course registrations, and it seemed that they were looking for new part-time jobs.

Jouji and Jouta were in high spirits right after the entrance ceremony, devoting themselves to hunting for clubs with cute girls. Nico-chan, who disappeared afterwards, was seriously consulting the “Easy Credit Acquisition Manual” that had been circulating secretly among the students and worrying over which lectures to take.

Kakeru managed to finish his course registration and immediately made a few acquaintances. Because he had no money, he snuck into freshmen welcoming parties and drank free alcohol every day. There was no scrutiny of what he was doing up to that point, and there was no hounding of what he was going to do from now on. Kakeru quickly fit into the do-as-you-please school atmosphere where people who didn’t interfere much with others gathered.

The course registration for all the students finally finished, and lectures would begin starting tomorrow. After Kakeru finished his evening jog and went through Chikusei-sou’s front door, he saw a sign hanging from the hole in the twins’ room. On the sign was written “Today’s Kakeru’s welcoming party. Everyone gather in the twins’ room at seven.”

My welcoming party. Kakeru felt ticklish. It was close to two weeks since he came here, and every night they made up a reason and held a drinking party or played mahjong in someone’s room, so he didn’t think there would be a welcoming party or anything at this point, but nevertheless, he was happy.

“I’m back,” he called down the hallway. In the kitchen, Kiyose and the twins were cooking for the party. Kiyose was stir-frying chopped onions and chunks of garlic in a big wok. Even though it was a wok, why did it smell like olive oil? Kakeru thought, puzzled. Kiyose, who was watching the fire with a serious expression, said, “Now!” Jouta quickly opened a can of tomatoes and dumped the contents into the wok. It seemed that they were making pasta sauce.

Jouta was tilting the can in one hand and handling a frying pan in his other. A huge amount of mustard greens and small fry danced in the air, and now it was the fragrant scent of sesame oil that drifted in the kitchen.

“We decided to make mixed rice,” Noticing Kakeru, Jouta said brightly. “Do you like mustard greens?”

Pasta and rice. While thinking what a high carb menu that was, Kakeru nodded.

Jouji was sitting at the dining table and making a bowlful of something that looked like spinach shiraae. (1) He was stirring so forcefully that there were beads of sweat on his forehead. A light green paste-like substance was being formed. Kakeru, feeling uneasy, tried to lend a hand, but was chased away with “The guest of honor doesn’t need to do anything.” Apparently, the welcoming party for the twins was completed before Kakeru arrived at Chikusei-sou. With the dignity of the former inhabitants of a land, Jouta and Jouji were assigned to cook.

Because there was nothing to do, Kakeru went to Tsuru no yu to take a bath by himself. After he was clean, he waited for seven o’clock in his room.

It seemed that he became drowsy while he waited, and when he woke up in a panic, it was already five minutes before seven. He thought that he should go to the twins’ room immediately, but arriving earlier than the arranged time would also be embarrassing, because it would seem like he was too impatient to wait. Kakeru stealthily opened his door to check out the situation. The kitchen was empty, and the first floor was completely silent. The signs of people and the sounds of standing and walking were concentrated in the twins’ room on the second floor.

Kakeru waited three more minutes, and then went up to the second floor.

When he opened the door, he saw Nico-chan threatening Musa with “Listen, just take attendance for me in this lecture!” while putting him in a headlock.

“Oh, Kakeru!” Jouta called out in a miserable voice. “Look, Kakeru came.”

Was I not supposed to come? Kakeru was confused, but apparently they were trying to sound the crackers in time for Kakeru’s arrival. We missed the timing because of Nico-chan-senpai making a huge fuss, Jouji said with a disgruntled face. While Shindou mediated, he rescued Musa from Nico-chan.

The residents crowded the twins’ room. Placed on the tea table in the center of the room and around it were the food Kiyose and the twins made, as well as the many sweets and alcohol brought by each person. King, who was hurriedly sneaking food, turned to Kakeru and told him to “Oh, sit” while chewing food.

Without obeying Kiyose’s calls to stop, the crackers headed towards the main house from the window and sounded all at once. A surprised Nira crawled out from beneath the veranda and barked incessantly at the moon.

“Now, shall we toast?”

Nico-chan took a canned bear. Kiyose surveyed the room.

“Feels like something’s missing.”

“Prince-san isn’t here!” The twins said in unison.

“Who’s that?”

Yuki answered Kakeru’s question.

“He’s Kashiwazaki Akane, who lives in Room 204. He’s a second year literature student.”

There was still a resident he hadn’t met yet? At any rate, why was he called “Prince”?

“I’ll go call him,” Kiyose said, standing up. “Kakeru, come with me.”

Exiting the twins’ room, Kiyose knocked on the door of Room 204, which was the closest to the stairs.

“I’m coming in, Prince.”

Without waiting for an answer, he opened the door. When Kakeru saw what was inside, he felt dizzy and staggered.

Inside the cramped room that had the exact same layout as Kakeru’s room, there were volumes and volumes of manga densely stacked from the floor all the way to near the ceiling. The surface of the tatami mats was only visible for a narrow passage. At the far end of this passage, there was a folded blanket placed next to the window. It seemed that since there was no space to lay out a futon, the resident of this room wrapped himself up in the blanket and slept. The lights were on in the room, it didn’t seem like the resident was here.

At any rate, it was a huge amount of manga. Room 204 was right above Kakeru’s room. Was this the reason for the creaking in his ceiling every night? Kakeru gently touched the stacks of manga that had become walls.

“Hey, don’t touch it. I sorted them all properly.”

A voice came from bon top of the mountain of manga next to him. Surprised, Kakeru stepped back to try to find the identity of the voice and hit his back into the mountain of manga. The books rustled down over his head.

“Oh, come on!”

From the space between the ceiling and the manga mountain, a man with a gorgeous face crawled out. He fluttered his heavy-looking eyelashes, which were worthy of his nickname of “Prince.”

“What’s going on, Haiji-san? Is this a new guy?”

“From about two weeks ago.”

Kiyose gathered the manga scattered on the tatami and handed them to Prince. “Tonight’s Kakeru’s welcome party. There should have been a sign hanging at the entryway.”

“Didn’t notice. I haven’t left Aotake for the past few days.”

“I want you to join us too.”

Despite saying “What a pain,” Prince went out into the hallway under the pressuring glint in Kiyose’s eyes. Kakeru hurriedly called out, “Um, the creaking in my room is really loud.”

“It’s loud everywhere.”

Perhaps lured by the scent of the food, Prince walked unsteadily towards the twins’ room, while still holding the manga.

“No, I think the creaking in my room is definitely worse than anywhere else.”

Kakeru was desperate. Living below a room carrying so much weight was extremely dangerous.

“Prince-san, let’s switch rooms.”

“I’m not going to put my precious manga on the humid first floor.” Prince bluntly shot down Kakeru’s proposal. "Your name’s Kakeru, right? You should think, ‘I’m living right below Niagara Falls.’”

“What do you mean?”

“Every day is full of thrills and things worth doing,” Prince opened the door to the twins’ room. “Furthermore, there are envious people who wish ‘I can live under something wonderful.’ My manga collection is unmistakably worth that much.”

Kakeru looked to Kiyose for help.

“I know what you want to say,” Kiyose sighed. “But, just give up.”

Now every resident of Chikusei-sou was in the twins’ room. Right after they did their toast, the atmosphere in the room accelerated, increasing the alcohol concentration, and there was laughter here and there.

Prince took the responsibility for accumulating manga and was made to sit between the boards where the risk of collapse was high. Kakeru was next to Kiyose with his back against the window that faced the yard. When he watched from here, he could understand the relationships between the residents of Chikusei-sou. They lived a semi-communal life in this cramped apartment. They had get along with each other from the start, but it seemed that some of them were particularly good friends.

The twins and Prince were having a heated discussion about manga while devouring sweets. Musa and Shindou were lending an ear to King’s anxieties about job hunting.

“I don’t even have the money to buy a suit.”

“How about a part-time job?”

“King-san, did your uniform from high school have a blazer? You can wear that if you did.”

Nico-chan and Yuki were immersed in talking about computers, which Kakeru couldn’t follow. Kakeru had already learned that though they were always snapping at each other, that was their normal, so he let them be. Even at times like these, Nico-chan approached the window Kakeru was sitting near and blew smoke towards the yard.

Kakeru and Kiyose didn’t particularly talk to each other, instead drinking beer and eating. Even though they were quiet, it was not awkward.

They knew that their common denominator with each other was track and field, but they somehow or other avoided talking about that. Kiyose seemed to be bearing that injury on his knee, and Kakeru wasn’t able to sort out the events of his high school days in his mind enough to be willing to talk about them. If they talked about track, it would seem like they would just be licking each other’s wounds, so he didn’t want to do that.

When the cans of beer were gone, Shindou opened the seal on the local sake sent from his hometown. The sake, whose name was unknown to all of them, was strangely sugary, but nobody cared about the taste. They devotedly consumed alcohol along with the snacks of cucumber, salt, and miso brought from the kitchen.

It was at that moment that Kiyose abruptly opened his mouth.

“Hey guys, listen up. I’ve got something important to say.”

Everyone, who was being noisy as they pleased, turned their attentions to Kiyose. They spontaneously formed a circle with the sake bottles in the center. What is he going to say? Kakeru thought as he looked at Kiyose’s face sitting next to him.

“I hope for all of your cooperation a little less than a year from now.”

“Are you taking a law exam or something?” Nico-chan asked leisurely.

“I can give you advice if you are,” Yuki said. Everyone was expecting that it would be something like wanting stop cooking meals for them because he was looking for a job, or something like that. However, Kiyose shook

“Everyone, let’s all for the top together.”

“…Of what?” Yuki cautiously prompted him on. The twins huddled together as though frightened. King muttered, “I’ve been suspecting Haiji’s up to something for a long time now.” Shindou and Musa exchanged glances.

“Combining the strengths of all ten of us, we take the top in sports.” Kiyose declared loudly. “If we are successful, it will make you popular with girls, as well as be advantageous for job hunting.”

“Is that true?”

The twins reacted, alert. They slowly constricted the circle and sidled up to Kiyose.

“Of course it’s true. It’s obvious that girls go crazy for guys who are good at sports, and on top of that, they are welcomed by big companies.”

The twins began to discuss immediately.

“If it’ll make me popular with girls, I’ll do it. Nii-chan?”

“Same here. But to the top of which sport exactly are we aiming for? You need nine people for baseball.”

“Soccer needs eleven people.”

“It’s kabaddi, right?” Nico-chan cut in.

“No,” Kiyose said. Yuki gave Nico-chan a cold look.

“Do you seriously think that doing kabaddi in the current Japan will make you famous enough to make your job search lucrative?”

“Plus, you need seven people for kabaddi,” King showed off his miscellaneous knowledge trained from quizzes.

Nico-chan and Prince instantly raised their hands and said, “Then, I pass.” For all of his sarcastic comments to Nico-chan, Yuki also raised his hand with them.

“Good luck with the rest, you guys.”

Musa looked over everyone present and reported brightly, “Now there’s exactly seven people.”

“I said, we’re not doing kabaddi, Musa,” Kiyose cleared his throat. “Furthermore, Yuki, you have no right to pass. Every year, I make special osechi and zouni for you, who whines about not wanting to go back home for New Year’s.” (2)

“Are you seriously threatening me?”

Yuki protested, but it was too weak. Kiyose smiled slyly.

“Why do you think I’ve cooking for you guys every day and working so hard to manage all of you guy’s health until now?”

What on Earth was Kiyose talking about? Everyone, who received the benefits from Kiyose’s housework abilities in no small part, fell silent as they sensed the danger. Now that I’ve fattened you up, let’s eat. It was as though they were lost brothers who were pulled out before a witch sharpening a kitchen knife.

Kiyose, who expressed interest in Kakeru’s running, and said he also did track. Kiyose, who forcibly dragged Prince to tonight’s welcoming party and gathered all the residents of Chikusei-sou. And finally, a sport done with ten people.

It can’t be, Kakeru thought.

“Do you still not understand what we’re aiming for?”

Kiyose was teasing the residents sitting in a row, as though he couldn’t resist having some fun. Everyone Kiyose’s gaze shot through were as reserved as a mosquito at the start of the season, hanging their heads and shaking them.

“It’s a sport that everyone’s seen at least once before. On TV, while eating zouni.”

“Could that be…”

Shindou gasped. Kiyose, leaning against the window frame, calmly stated,

“Yes, Ekiden. What we’re aiming for is the Hakone Ekiden.”

Previous | Next

[imaginesnkdorks]

“Words Unsaid” Levi x Reader

Pairing: Levi/Reader

Genre: Angst, Fluff

Warnings: Violence, Language

Words: 3580

She never thought she’d miss fighting titans. It was horrible, yes, but it was her normal. This – the existence of other humans and other nations – is so new and confusing! It’s been four years, yet Y/N can barely keep up with all the changes.

She knows it’s bad, being a soldier and not being able to adapt much. Still, Y/N tries. But then Eren went rogue and started that shitshow in Liberio. The politics of it all is lost on Y/N, but she does know that it only put a spotlight on them. What’s more, is that they lost one of their veteran fighters and close friend, Sasha.

The only thing Y/N is positively thankful for is how she got a lot closer to Levi in the last four years. Going through hell the way they did is bound to do that to people.

She remembered it as if it was just yesterday – Levi took her and her 104th cadet corps classmates under his wing after Reiner and Bertholdt reveal themselves to be titan shifters. Y/N won’t deny that she was intimidated by Levi, and occasionally scared of him. Still, it’s difficult to not admire the man. Levi is really someone who –

“Oi! You look constipated. Need to use the can?” Levi pulled Y/N off her thoughts with one of his well-known jokes. Y/N made a face at that, but ultimately just ignored it, opting to tell Levi something she’s been meaning to all day.

“I don’t trust that monkey.” She said firmly like nothing could possibly ever change her mind.

“I don’t, either.” Levi answered as he continued putting rations in his pack. Y/N decided to give him a hand and grabbed water canisters for Levi. “I don’t like you being alone with him.”

Levi finally stopped and stared at Y/N for a long time. Releasing a heavy sigh, and shoulders drooping with all the weight and responsibility he’d been carrying for years, Levi tried to reassure her.

“I won’t be alone with him. Thirty fully armed soldiers will be with me.” They were quiet as they continued their preparation. See, the residents within the Walls – residents of Paradis Island – finally took a move against those formerly aligned with Marley.

A bag of tea leaves were the last thing to go in Levi’s pack, and their silence was now accompanied by their stillness. Which is the opposite of Y/N’s heart. Restless is an understatement. She knows Levi can handle himself, however this Zeke posses’ power they’ve never seen before.

“I know you’re worried, Y/N. Things are becoming more unpredictable. But I need you to focus on your task.” Levi told her, gentler this time. Because, unknown to Y/N, Levi actually enjoys her company. Still, getting closer to her is both exciting and terrifying to Levi. “Stop worrying about me and focus on your task. And stay alert… stay safe.”

“Fine.” Y/N wanted to say a lot more than that but decided against it. Levi is right, after all. It won’t do her much good if her minds keep on wondering. Besides, she and those left from the 104th class has to deal with Eren.

“Well, I’m off.” Levi was just about to open the door and leave when Y/N found herself calling after him. Why? Y/N doesn’t know why she called Levi – there’s nothing else to say now, is there? She thought about telling Levi how she feels – since years ago – but that sounded like they’re saying goodbye for good.

“What?” Levi only received a shake of her head. Still, the silence spoke volumes. Levi echoes the same thoughts Y/N has at that moment. He stalled at the door, deciding what to do and – oh, fuck it, threw caution to the wind.

“Uh! – “All Y/N could do was make a meek sound of surprise. Levi reached out and hugged her. It was over in an instant, and Y/N was left confused as Levi rushed out red-faced.

“Y/N!”

“Yes?” Y/N was out of it. Her last interaction with Levi still sketched in her mind. Overthinking every detail, she even lost sleep on why Levi would do that?

“Let’s go.” Hange tried to get her attention again. Finally, Y/N decided that she’d just ask Levi when they see each other again. And she should do what Levi asked and focus on the task at hand.

See, a bunch of soldiers – mostly new recruits – released information about the Liberio incident to civilians and journalists. Naturally, people started to harangue the Survey Corps, especially Commander Hange. Hange, Y/N and some soldiers are about to face the bunch of soldiers who are dubbed Jaegerists.

What’s more, is that General Zackley was murdered by these fanatics of Eren. It literally was a shitshow and whirlwind of events these past days. And the fact that Y/N still hasn’t heard from Levi is starting to get onto her.

         And as a cherry on top, Eren escaped his underground prison. Making their way to the horses, Y/N made her thoughts known. “We couldn’t possibly trust Zeke, after everything that Yelena and the rest did.” Still, she was most worried about Levi.

         “Of course.” Hange agreed, “we have to be thorough. If we don’t want to be played like fools, we have to expose Zeke’s scheme.”

         “How do we do that? Inquired Armin.

         “We have to talk to the other Marleyans, of course.”

         They ended up at the restaurant – a place where Marleyans more or less felt at home. Y/N would like to say that everything went peachy afterward – they got exactly what they wanted, drank wine and ate good food, exposed Zeke and got rid of him, and got all the happiness they deserved. Alas, it’s just where things got worse than they thought possible.

         Turns out, the Wine the Marleyans gave out were contaminated with Zeke’s spinal fluid – and any Eldian who drank it would turn to mindless titans whenever Zeke wants them to.

         Which brings them to their current predicament.

         “Do you think this will work? Water will really wash it out?” Y/N asked Jean as she tried washing off the blood from the boy’s face and mouth. Hange was busy with filling the tub with water and telling Onyankopon what to do.

         “I don’t know.” Jean answered her all business. Clearly, his mind is on the whatever Zeke has planned.

         Nervousness started to spread from Y/N’s nape down to her toes. Zeke is effectively threatening every Eldian here with his spine-wine despite being far away. “Levi… they could be in trouble.” Y/N said but was interrupted by a scuffle outside.

         “Hange!” Jean and Y/N shared a look. Hange went to see what it’s about.

         “What is it?” Hange inquired. “Wha -?! Floch?” Jean and the others can’t help their curiosity now, even Y/N. Making sure the kid won’t drown, Y/N also went to look. Surprised? Yes, anyone would be if they see themselves at the end of several rifles.

         “Commander. You must know where Zeke is. You’re going to take us to him.” Floch said, all business. He seriously looked ready to shoot and kill them. But Y/N couldn’t care less about that. This can’t happen – these Jaeger loyalists shouldn’t be anywhere near Zeke! Especially now that Levi’s with Zeke.

         Before Y/N could do anything though, Hange took over. “Listen, we’re not trying to oppose you. Didn’t you get the proposal from the corps?”

         “Yes. And we declined it. We don’t negotiate with the corps.”

         “And why’s that?” Hange said, eyes wandering over all the hostile soldiers.

         “Eren’s decision.” By this point, Y/N is no longer paying much attention. Her thoughts are running wild on how she could get to Levi and warn him. She could go back inside – pretend to still care for the boy they were helping earlier. Y/N is pretty sure there’s a small window she could sneak out of. And then …

         They were pushed at gunpoint. Floch knocked at a door in the restaurant – one of the many private party rooms – “We’re leaving.” A voice which sounded a lot like Eren’s answered, “Okay.”

         Y/N was shoved in a carriage with the injured Marleyan kid and Hange. Why? Floch decided that Y/N will be more likely to cooperate than just Hange. Floch knows Y/N would want to see Levi as soon as possible.

         After stopping first at the Cadet training camp, they continued towards the general location of Levi’s camp. Y/N wanted so badly to talk to Hange and plan. Some way to get rid of Floch. Y/N could barely glance at Hange without one of the Jaeger loyalists – Jaegerists – pointing a gun at her or threaten her.

         They reach a river, and as they were crossing a small bridge, something exploded in the distant.

         “What is that?”

         “A lightning strike?”

         While they were distracted, Hange and Y/N were finally able to share a look. It wasn’t a lightning strike, it’s a thunder spear.

         “There must be something happening in the direction where the sound comes from.” Floch announced. Y/N wanted to rush there more than anything, but she must act smart.

         They came upon a steaming titan, injured horses, and a blown cart.

         “Y/N, Commander Hange, please don’t move around on your own.”

         Y/N mind was a blank yet chaotic at the same time. Her eyes scanning all around. Thunder spears mean someone from Levi’s squad was here – or Levi himself. And that was when Y/N saw it – the wings of freedom!

         Someone was lying at the river bank wearing the green cape of the Survey Corps.

         “Someone’s over there!” Y/N yelled, voice shaking. Y/N has a sickening feeling that it’s Levi. “Hey! Are you still alive?” Y/N’s heart stopped the moment she turned the person’s face towards her. “Levi?”

         Shards of the iron bamboo were embedded on Levi’s bloody face. “No…” Y/N was rushing to check Levi’s state, and more importantly if he’s still breathing. Y/N didn’t even notice Hange at her side. Levi still has a pulse, weak, but it’s still there.

         “I have no idea what happened… but we’re lucky. Our number one threat is here all bloodied up.”

         “Let’s shoot him in the head.” Y/N instantly moved to shield Levi with her body. Mind rushing to plan to escape. Hange told Floch that Levi’s dead. While she was busy convincing Floch and the others, Y/N was still stumped as on what to do. The river?

         “I can also take his pulse. So let me have a look.” Floch was starting to walk closer, making Y/N stand defensively.

         “Move aside.”

         “No.” Y/N was standing firmly. She won’t back down even when Floch pointed a gun at her. “No.”

Floch’s finger was about to pull the trigger when someone called him. “Floch! There’s something weird with this Titan!” At their distraction, Hange and Y/N decided to take Levi and escape, hoping the water won’t kill the injured Levi.

---

“He’s not breathing!” Hange said, and that was all Y/N needed to hear to take over. She began to give him chest compressions and mouth-to-mouth. “Breathe! Please, Levi…” Desperation was what kept her running. “You can’t die yet. No…”

Y/N’s mind was filled with memories of her and Levi, just drinking tea together or cleaning his office… and their brief hug. Y/N wasn’t even able to tell him how she feels.

A beat… faint, but it is there. “His heart!” Y/N exclaimed and can’t help the laughter that escaped her. It was certainly a combination of relief and stress.

“We need to find shelter… and to get warm and dry.” Hange said despite knowing that she’d be the one to do that. There’s no way Y/N would leave Levi. Of all people, Hange is the one who surely understands – she’s the one to catch all their longing glances towards each other after all!

They – mostly just Hange – were able to find an abandoned and run-down cottage. The single cot was only big enough to fit Levi. Both Hange and Y/N had to settle for the rickety chairs or just lay down their capes as makeshift blankets.

Y/N never left Levi’s side. It’s been two days and he still hasn’t woken up. His injuries are not good, still, he’s alive. And Y/N is very thankful for that.

“I’m heading out now.” Hange announced as she set off to scavenge for food. Good thing there is a lot of fish in the river and some wild mushrooms and root crops near the cottage.

“Okay. I’ll be right here.” Hange was about to say something else but decided against it. Nodding at Y/N, she went out. It was becoming their routine. Y/N feels guilty about leaving all that work to Hange, but she can’t exactly leave Levi.

         She began to clean Levi’s wound for the day. Long gushes and deep wounds now cover his face. Y/N made sure to take all the blade shards, still, Levi would have to live with these scars. And his hands! He lost tips of his fingers. Y/N don’t know if he would still be able to do the things he once was.

         Y/N busied herself with repairing what’s left of Levi’s 3DM gear. They need to survive, and it’ll be difficult without a single weapon. There are barely any usable pieces of blades left as well. Y/N’s mind was on strangling Floch when rustling sounds reached her ears.

         “Y/N…”

         “Levi!” Y/N literally dropped everything. Levi’s voice was weak and so unlike him. “How do you feel?” She asked, moving closer to inspect him.

         “I feel like shit…” This answer gave Y/N some relief she needed. Levi sounds a lot like himself already. “That crazy monkey, he turned them all into titans.” Levi had a far-off look on his face, probably thinking about his fellow soldiers.

         “He really did, huh? It was the wine. Everyone who drank it also ingested Zeke’s spinal fluid.”

         Levi finally turn to look at Y/N. “You didn’t have any of it, did you?” Before Y/N could answer, Levi tried to reach out to her… and noticed his hand for the first time. A good part of his index and middle fingers are missing – the very fingers use to hold his blades.

         Levi was quiet, almost very quiet. Y/N didn’t know what to say, so she just grabbed Levi’s hand. What do you say to someone who just went through what Levi did?

         “You’re okay now. I’m sorry we didn’t come earlier…” Feeling of guilt wash over Y/N, “I should have been with you.”

         Levi gripped her hand as hard as he could, and his stare was more piercing than usual that Y/N is sure Levi can read all her thoughts and feelings.

         “Don’t. It’s not your fault. We had no idea it was gonna end up this way.”

         “Still, it’s not a good feeling.” Y/N answered quietly. Neither of them noticed how tight their hands were intertwined by then. Surely a sign of the feelings that remain unspoken.

         “Thank you, by the way. I’m probably only alive because of you, Y/N.” It was at that moment Y/N heart stopped. Levi just gave her a smile so sincere and gentle; it took her breath away. Y/N can’t stop the smile that appeared on her lips – a smile so big her cheeks hurt.

         “I’m sure you’d do the same for me.”

         It was a quiet couple of days. Levi was recovering quickly, and Hange was finally able to take longer breaks since Y/N is now able to forage and hunt.

         “We need to have a plan.” Levi declared one night as they were having some squirrels for dinner. “If Jaegerists are successful in taking over, we can assume that no help would come. It’s up to us.”

         “You’re right. I still have connections in Trost, though. I just have to get in touch with them.” Hange was clearly already planning everything. She has that focused looked of hers, something she usually gets when her mind is on capturing titans.

         “I can get in contact with them for you.” Said Y/N, taking both Hange and Levi by surprise.

         “No.” Levi said firmly, clearly unhappy about the proposition.

         “What do you mean no? You and Hange are too recognizable. I doubt anyone would pay attention to me.”

         “No. Floch and Onyankopon know who you are. It’s too risky.”

         “Well, it’s better me than Humanity’s strongest or Commander Hange now, is it?”

         Sensing the sudden onslaught of tension, Hange made a wise decision of getting out of there quickly. “Let’s talk it over more tomorrow morning. Rest up you two! I’ll take first watch.” And off she goes.

         “Look, I know I can do this. I’m also a soldier like you, remember?” Y/N hissed. Unhappy being an understatement. She was unmoving on her spot on the dingy cot – something Levi absolutely detest – and was trying to avoid Levi’s eyes. She’s not sure what she was expecting to happen, but she does know that she just wants them… Levi to trust her to do this.

         Levi let go of a deep sigh, and after shaking his head, he went on to sit beside Y/N. “I know you’re more than capable. You’re one of the most talented people I know.”

         “Then why?” The brewing annoyance inside Y/N seems to disappear the moment she laid her eyes on Levi. Concern was evident on his face, and that took her by surprise.

         Quietly, almost inaudibly Levi let go of his frustration. “Fuck it…” He turned, eyes burning with all the pent-up emotions he gathered throughout the years, “I don’t want anything to happen to you. You’re the... most important person to me. Has been for quite a while now. And I’ll be damned if I let you walk out that door and get caught up in all this shit!”

         Y/N felt like she forgot how to breathe. It’s like both her chest and throat was burning! And she never thought she wanted to hear just what Levi said, but it was something she really needed to hear. “So, you don’t doubt me?”

         “No, of course not. I just want you to be safe. As safe as we all could be anyway.” It was when Y/N finally gave in to her urges and launched herself on Levi, engulfing him in a big hug. Tears of happiness and relief were threatening to spill from her eyes, so she buried her face more on Levi’s chest. She felt his hand hesitantly pat her back… before he did it again, and again and it felt like the most natural thing in the world.

         Seemingly coming to her senses, Y/N pulled away, “I… um I’m sorry about that.”

         Shaking his head, he brought his hand to Y/N’s face, caressing her cheeks in a very sweet and warm gesture. “Don’t you think we ought to be more honest to each other now?”

         Y/N’s laughter rang around the room, bring warmth and joy to the clearly crappy little cottage. “I guess you’re right.” And it was like words were no longer necessary. Suddenly, everything seems to make sense and both Levi and Y/N are thankful that everything happened the way they did as it brought both of them here and now.

         It was only natural for Y/N to close her eyes, and for Levi to close the gap between them. The kiss was light as a feather at first, as if they’re both testing the waters. But that little gesture broke the dam, and every feeling they ever had for each other came pouring out.

         It was passionate and loving; Levi felt a thirst like no other and he was seeking relief from Y/N’s lips. They let this action talk for them, still, it wasn’t enough. At one point they had to come up for air as if they were drowning – drowning in each other’s affection.

         “I love you.” They said, almost at the same time. And they know and felt in that moment that whatever happens, whoever wins this blasted war, the two of them would never regret a thing as the words that went unsaid for years are now laid out.

         “I love you.”

Copyright © 2019 by imaginesnkdorks. All rights reserved

[daveyjacobss]

like a sun rising | davey jacobs

french vanilla part four

reader x davey jacobs

[ newsies modern au ]

summary: every sunrise is a new beginning. 

a/n: lol my summaries for these things just get shorter and more cryptic each time. sorry it’s been a little while since the last installment of this series, but i’m really hoping you’ll enjoy this one. as always, feel free to come talk to me about it afterwards! also, don’t be afraid to be asked to be added to my taglist !! if you already asked and i didn’t put you on it just shoot me a quick reminder :)

( french vanilla masterlist )

__________

__________

Davey was in a bit of a frenzy. He had cleaned the entire apartment (twice) and was constantly rearranging pillows and blankets on the couch, attempting to find the perfect positioning for them. All of his materials for the book were on the coffee table in neat piles that he had spent almost an entire day organizing, his laptop sitting right next to them. Sarah watched him with an amused expression on her face, shaking her head at him as she drank her tea. She had spent almost an hour in his room with him watching him try to pick out an outfit before she had snapped and just chosen one for him. He had on a gray sweater over top of a blue button up with black jeans. (She was sure that he remembered, just as she did, that Y/N had loved when he wore sweaters over button ups, but neither of them said a word.)

Jack was at an art convention for the weekend, which meant Davey didn't have to tell him about Y/N and that Sarah was staying for moral support. He had told the other boys that he had an essay he had to finish and would be holed up in his apartment for a few days. It was a normal enough, Davey and Jack were well known for locking themselves away in their apartment whenever they had a project to work on. It was probably one of the reasons they got along so well.

On the kitchen counter there was a plate of cookies that Sarah had baked and brought over, and there was coffee already brewing (and french vanilla creamer in the fridge). She couldn't help but feel like she was a mother organizing a play date for her anxiety-ridden child that had made his first ever friend. She had to keep reminding herself that getting annoyed with his antics would only make the situation worse - and it wasn't as if his nervousness wasn't warranted. She would bet money that Davey felt more adrenaline and fear when they heard a knock on the apartment door than he had in his entire life. He looked at her quickly, his eyes wide with panic. She nodded toward the door, raising an eyebrow in question. He took a deep breathe before nodding his head and walking to the door.

She sipped her tea, preparing herself for the long day ahead.

__________

Y/N had called someone the day after Davey had invited her over. Her and her ex-coworker, Alex, weren't as close anymore, seeing as neither of them still worked at the coffee shop, but they kept in touch. She wasn't entirely sure that he would care at all, but she had to talk to someone. He picked up the phone after the second ring.

"Hello?"

"Do you remember Davey Jacobs?"

"Oh, hi, Y/N. Nice to talk to you, too." She could practically hear him rolling his eyes from the other side of the phone.

"Hi, Alex. Wonderful to talk to you again. Do you remember Davey Jacobs?"

"The boy who you flirted with for a while at the shop before you guys actually started dating and then he broke your heart right before you left for Paris? That Davey Jacobs?"

"Yeah," she sighed. "That Davey Jacobs."

"No, I don't really remember him." The bastard was grinning, she knew he was.

"Alex!" She heard him laugh quietly to himself.

"Alright, alright. I'm sorry. Yes, I remember Davey Jacobs. Why are you asking?" Y/N took a deep breath, running her hand through her hair.

"I saw him again. And we talked. And it was nice. And then he called me. And now I'm going to his house on Saturday."

"What the fuck?"

"Can you come over?"

"I'm already out the door."

When Alex had arrived, he knocked harshly and repetitively on her door. She almost fell over running to go open it, out of breath and obviously frazzled when she finally got it open and was looking her old best friend in face. He stalked in immediately, making wild hand gestures.

"He broke your heart, Y/N!" He cried out, pacing around the living room. She winced at his volume, grateful that her roommate was out.

"I know that!" She yelled back indignantly before lowering her voice. "Of course I know that."

"Then why go back to him?" Alex was staring at her incredulously, trying to piece the situation together and get whatever he could out of her.

"Because I saw him again, and we talked. And it just felt so... so natural, Alex. Like a habit I can't be rid of. I mean, I was sitting with him and I felt so warm and safe, and literally nothing else mattered. And he looked so good and his cheeks were red, and I wanted to kiss him so bad." She took a deep breath, running her hands through her hair as she looked back up at her friend. He was watching her with sad but understanding eyes. Without saying anything he walked up to her and wrapped his arms around her. She hugged him back without a second thought, letting herself relax a bit.

"You two were the happiest couple I had ever seen, you know that? We all thought that you were made for each other, that you guys would last forever."

"Alex, that's not helping." He shushed her, kissing her forehead affectionately.

"Let me finish," he smiled. He pulled away from her so he could look her in the eye. "I don't think that you were ever meant to break up. I think you two were literally written in the stars, and I think you deserve your happy ending. I think that the reason you broke up was valid at the time, but now it's kind of stupid." She looked at him with wide eyes, sniffling as he spoke. "Y/N, why did you call me?" She laughed bitterly.

"I wanted you to talk me out of it," she admitted. He grinned in response.

"Well, tough shit. I think that if you have a shot at a second chance with a boy like Davey fucking Jacobs you're sure as hell taking it." She laughed, smiling back at him. He spent the rest of the day at her apartment, keeping her distracted from the worries fighting their way into her mind.

_________

When Davey went to open the door, he figured he was prepared as he'd ever be. He was wrong. He was nowhere near prepared for the sight of Y/N L/N standing in his doorway for the first time in a year, looking as beautiful as ever. He stopped breathing for a second, looking at her standing in her cream colored sweater and blue jeans rolled up over her ankles. She looked like a goddamn angel.

She was smiling at him nervously, the same way he had seen her smile when he had introduced her to his parents for the first time, and fiddling with the strap of the bag she had brought with her. Her cheeks were flushed from the wind outside, painting them a delightful pink. Time stopped for a few seconds, the two of them just staring at each other.

"Hey, Dave," Y/N finally spoke up. In just one month he had forgotten how much he adored the sound of her voice.

"Hey, Y/N," he breathed, opening the door wider so that she could walk into the apartment. He closed the door behind her, reminding himself to take deep breaths. She looked around, fingers still relentlessly tugging at the strap of her backpack. He watched as she smiled softly at the environment, knowing that not much had changed since the last time she had been there, save for it being a bit cleaner. He tried not to think about the last time they had stood together in his living room, the memory stinging his heart. He pushed away the pain.

A silence lingered between them, but it wasn't like the one from the night everything had gone wrong. There was still a bit of awkwardness - the uncertainty of the hope slowly bubbling in their chests - but underneath it all there was a sense of familiarity. Even with all the time that had passed, they were still just David Jacobs and Y/N L/N. Still just two fools who had fallen in love and forgotten how to fall out of it.

"You got a new blanket," she spoke up, pointing at one of the only things she didn't recognize in the room - a dark green blanket, folded and resting on the couch.

"Uh, yeah, we did. Someone spilled something all over the gray one during a movie night and we had to throw it away. It was unsalvageable." He hated having to make small talk with her. He hated knowing that no matter what there was always going to be something that held them back from each other.

"Aw, the gray one was my favorite." She pouted playfully, turning to face him again. He smiled shyly at her. "My condolences for your loss, though." He laughed, and she smiled, and it really wasn't fair how right it felt. She clapped her hands together suddenly and he was shaken out the trance he always seemed to slip into while looking at her. "Okay, what do you want to start with?"

"Huh?" He looked at her in confusion and she rolled her eyes, somehow making even such a sarcastic action seem nice and playful.

"For the book, duh. That's why you invited me over, right?" He nodded quickly, leading them both over to the couch so they could look at all the papers he had organized on the coffee table.

"Well, I was hoping to talk about the characters, to start. I feel like we were missing pieces of them, you know? Like, we had basic knowledge of their lives and we gave enough information to make them people, but not really to make them real. We didn't really know them. Does that make sense?" He glanced at her anxiously.

"Yes." Her answer came out in a breathless kind of whisper and her cheeks were tinted pink. "Yeah, that makes complete sense." There was a pause where she looked at all of the papers and then back at Davey, almost as if she was seeing it all for the first time. Even him. "I missed this, talking about writing and books and all that. I don't have anyone to do that with anymore."

He couldn't breathe. God, who gave her the right to just say things like that? Things that made him miss her more than ever and reminded him that she wasn't his anymore? And what business did she have looking at him like that? Like she had the very first day they had met? Like they were back in the coffee shop and they were younger and didn't know about all the tragedy and hurt that would befall them? She shouldn't have been looking at him like that.

He never wanted her to stop looking at him like that.

"I missed it, too." Her smile spread slowly and gently across her face and he swore he was falling in love all over again, right then and there. She had a habit of smiling like a sun rising, and he adored it.

"Oh!" She exclaimed, bringing her bag onto her lap and unzipping it. "I brought all the stuff I could find, everything that I still have." She pulled out a folder stuffed with papers and sticky notes and all the little ideas and concept building she and Davey had written down.

"That is a huge ass folder," a voice said from behind them. They both turned to find Sarah with a mug in her hands, eyes wide as she looked at all the papers. "I didn't realize you guys had done that much work on the story before."

"Well, we did spend quite a while on it," Davey responded, shooting his sister a pointed look that clearly meant he wanted her to leave. She smiled mischievously and walked around the couch, plopping herself down next to Y/N, careful not to spill her tea.

"Hey Y/N, how are you?" Her smile softened when talking to Y/N, but all Davey could focus on was how nervous and scared Y/N suddenly looked.

"I'm uh, I'm pretty good, you?" Her voice was small and Davey had to resist the urge to reach out and grab her hand as a way of comfort. She had been just as nervous the day she had met Sarah for the first time, and Davey had held her hand the whole time. He tried not to let the pain of remembering show on his face.

"I'm fantastic," Sarah grinned. "And I made cookies, so if you want some they're in the kitchen." Y/N nodded and Davey could hardly stand to watch the interaction, completely aware of all the awkward tension in the air.

"It's really good to see you," Y/N blurted out, staring right at Sarah. The older Jacobs sibling practically beamed.

"You too." Davey could practically feel the way the tension dissipated as they looked at each other, smiling. Sarah always had been fond of Y/N, and Y/N had always felt the same way. Davey had never been more happy that Sarah was the one he confided in when it came to all things Y/N related.

Sarah stayed a while, listening as Davey and Y/N worked out ideas for their characters, sometimes offering comments or making jokes. They worked and talked for hours, snacking on cookies and other junk foods. They had each gone through almost three mugs of coffee, tea, and hot chocolate respectively. When dinner time rolled around, Sarah insisted that Y/N should stay and eat with them, but Y/N kindly declined.

She said that she was having dinner with a friend of hers, but thanked them for the kind offer. Davey tried to ignore the way his heart trembled when the door closed behind her. He tried not to think about the way the door had slammed the last time she had walked out. He tried not to think of the way he had let her go. He tried not to think about the way that he had sat, stewing in his own anger and self hatred after she was gone.

He tried not to think of her at all, but it was easier said than done.

________

Alex wanted to know every single detail at dinner. Y/N was all too happy to oblige - she had always loved relaying every single detail of the time she spent with Davey. She wanted to memorize all of it, and retelling it helped. She told Alex about the way his apartment was almost exactly the same as it had been a year ago, about the way Sarah had treated her as an old friend, about the way she had spent the whole time trying not to stare at Davey because he looked oh so good in his button up and sweater. She told him everything, and he grinned the whole way through. By the end of the night he was placing bets on when Y/N and Davey would get back together. She told him to shut up, but the thought rooted itself in her head and brought a warmth to her chest.

She crashed at his place instead of going home, texting her roommate to let her know. She was too exhausted to make the trek back to her own apartment. She woke in the early hours of the morning, while Alex was still sleeping. Quietly, she slipped out the window and onto his fire escape. The sun was just beginning to rise, and she wrapped her arms around herself while she watched it ascend.

She thought of the way Jack had loved to paint sunsets and sunrises, wondering if he still did, or if he had found a new type of scene to paint over and over again. She thought of the way she had once pulled an all nighter with Race and Spot and they had watched the sun rise together, wondering if they still spent their nights together, staying up until morning. She thought of the way Katherine favorite outfit was made up of the colors of a sunrise, wondering if she had found new favorite clothes in an entirely new color palette. She thought of the way the sunlight used to stream through the windows of Davey's bedroom as it was rising, illuminating the two of them still tangled together. She wondered if there had been anyone else waking up with the sun still tangled in his bed since she had left. Thinking about all of it hurt. It ached in the way old wounds always seemed to do, the pain resurfacing as if brand new.

She cried while she watched the sunrise, thinking about everything she had lost and everything she no longer knew. When Alex woke up he brought her two pieces of toast and a glass of orange juice and didn't ask any questions, simply sat with her and looked out at the sky, eating his own toast and drinking a mug of coffee.

When she finally went back to her own apartment later in the day, feeling strangely empty, she ate some lunch while staring blankly at the TV as some rerun played. After she finished eating, she got in the shower, trying to scrub away the memories and the hurt. Halfway through her shower, her phone vibrated. By the time she got out and got dressed, she had forgot about it.

It wasn't until she picked up her phone to type up a quick grocery list before she headed out to the store that she remembered. Right there on her screen was a text notification, and she almost dropped her phone.

No part of her could fathom why Charles Morris, more affectionately known as Crutchie, would be texting her after all the time that had passed. She didn't even read the text, just made her shopping list and left, pushing it to the back of her mind. She was too tired and numb to deal with it, filing it away as a problem for later.

__________

tag list: @isarants  @tomanybandstolove  @seriously-ceci  @bens-platt  @earlyjunes  @broadway-trashh  @interwebseriesfan24  @returnoftheborle  @cozykleinman  @timesarehardfornewsies  @jackclyde  @last-an-eon  @annabethgranger123  @musi-xals  @notyouraveragegryffindoor  @magic-made-by-melody @i-also-miss-our-talks

@linfuckingmirandaaa @shatteringinprogress @storytellersun @psych-stereo @books-cats-sprinkles @me-andthe-sky @connor-is-my-sunshine @merediths2003 @papesfordavey @larryisinfactnotstraight @casifer-is-cute @gem-evieve @actually-lizzy @broadwayobsessedteen @majo16199 @sarkitsm @suffering-bi @tommy-braccoli

[cuddlingsun]

hello @ciaoloueh​ (or her phansona, danielbear) has tagged me to do this thingy and it’s long bUT THATS FINE BECAUSE I FIXED IT SO NOW I CAN MENTION PEOPLE AND DO A READ MORE AND LIFE IS BEAUTIFU

Rules: Once you have been tagged you are supposed to write 92 truths about yourself. At the end, choose 25 people to tag!

THE LAST… 1. Drink: water! I tried to drink some after waking up (and another sip just now) because who knows if I drink enough it might be a step to being healthier

2. Phone call: my mom, who called to ask what kind of math my brother has

3. Text message: cbs™ got a very excited text about how i can mention people now, it’s truly revolutionary 

4. Song you listened to: green light by lorde i think

5. Time you cried: i remember crying in my dream last night but can’t remember the actual time sorry

HAVE YOU EVER… 6. Dated someone twice: nope

7. Been cheated on: nope

8. Kissed someone and regretted it: nope

9. Lost someone special: yup

10. Been depressed: well I think so, but like it wasn’t officially diagnosed and all, do feel tons better rn even if it isn’t all that amazing yet

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: nope

LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLORS:

12. dark red

13. dark blue

14. the purple/olive green/brown aesthetic that hana gave me lmao

I JUST LOVE A LOT OF THINGS OKAY FIGHT ME

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU… 15. Made new friends: yes! though the real life ones aren’t proper friends but the online ones are I guess :D

16. Fallen out of love: sort of??? maybe it was before this past year so idk let’s say no so I feel better about it

17. Laughed until you cried: i’d sure hope so

18. Found out someone was talking about you: ha yes but not that i care too much about it, trying to not have any contact with those people anyway

19. Met someone who changed you: not sure, don’t think so

20. Found out who your true friends are: sort of? i kind of decided to not try too hard for people that don’t try for me? like there’s a difference between being scared to start conversations and just generally not caring abt me as a person u know

21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: nope

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: i’m going to count it hold up -- 44 out of the 51 

23. Do you have any pets: sadly no

24. Do you want to change your name: sort of did but not anymore? i like to use bus because it’s easy and a nickname but i can live with my name i guess (though maybe change the official spelling lmao)

25. What did you do for your last birthday: i had some friends over and had a chilled out get together (and my mom had cooked dinner) which was nice I guess (also two of my friends got me a book which nearly made me cry but all right)

26. What time did you wake up: around nine I think? woke up around 6.25 then around 8.06 and then somewhere before 9.30 (i’m being specific if u care to read this far you won’t mind anyway)

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: trying to sleep by daydreaming 

28. Name something you cannot wait for: I cannot wait for a bunch of things but myself aside i can’t wait for one direction to come back?? which sounds selfish i mean i love their solo careers but boys i miss u 

29. When was the last time you saw your mother: last night when she had made some tea but it was too sour for me and then i went to bed (i just went downstairs and saw her again, if that makes u happier)

30. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: we can’t get into this now fully, but i feel like having tons of money could make a big change to my current situation

31. What are you listening to right now: nothing tbh (also changed to green light when i came back, i was halfway through)

32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: lmao yes he helped teach maths at uni which was cool i guess

33. Something that is getting on your nerves: me but also in general the state of the world, but also me a lot

34. Most visited website: tumblr probably lmao 

35. Elementary: was cool I guess, i had a real good year and then it was shitty again but overall could have been worse

36. High School: wasn’t the best, could’ve been worse. i don’t really feel any type of Big Feelings towards any of these

37. College/university: sadly didn’t finish the one thing, so next year i’m starting law? (wish me luck tbh) and afterwards i want to genuinely study physics/chemistry at some point again but who knows if it will happen and when 38. Hair colour: brown

39. Long or short hair: short, but it’s been growing quite a lot

40. Do you have a crush on someone: not that i know of and boy is it good i love it finally time to focus on MYSELF am i rite ladies

41. What do you like about yourself: my mind mostly, physically i don’t LIKE anything but i’m not in full hatred either so there’s that 

42. Piercings: i had my ears pierced but i don’t wear jewelry so 

43. Blood type: i believe O but i’m not sure and don’t know the positive/negative thingy

44. Nickname: lmao hana literally referred to me as bus here so that, don’t really have any others?? bush but i don’t really like that one so

45. Relationship status: single and v v v v happy with that

46. Zodiac sign: libra

47. Pronouns: she/her

48. Favourite TV show: brooklyn nine-nine, merlin, elementary (and well doctor who, victoria and dirk gently too) (also liked selfie?? and atlantis, galavant, agent carter)

49. Tattoos: none  50. Right or left hand: right (though i want to learn writing with both hands tbh)

FIRST… 51. Surgery: i think they did something with my ears when i was really really young so I don’t even remember it (and i’m scared of surgery so let’s keep it this way)

52. Piercing: the one but also none u feel 

54. Sport: i did ballet which i loved but then i had to stop or go on with people who were like two or three years older than me and were way better so i quit

55. Vacation: i mean i went to turkey every year even as a tiny baby i think so that probably? 

56. Pair of trainers:  i was a tiny child, how should i remember this

57. Eating: ah okay not first so um had a tiny bit of chocolate but still deciding on breakfast 

58. Drinking: the water is still there, i’ll take a sip now

59. I’m about to: figure out what to read whilst i hide from the cleaning lady for three hours (and probably eat something first) 

60. Listening to: currently it’s royals also by lorde 

61. Waiting for: a simple thing rn because we’re not that deep yet: a burst of motivation to go shopping tonight with my sister and her friend

62. Want: general Big Life Things, but also just books??? i fucking love books NO FUCK I WANT TIME LOTS OF TIME SO I CAN DO EVERYTHING I WANT TO DO

63. Get married: not planning to but who knows life is weird

64. Career: okay look the most ideal one would be a scientist and an author but we all know studying law won’t get me there so we’re still figuring it out, but scientist and author??? especially scientist??? id die for that man

YOUR TYPE… 65. Hugs or kisses: currently feeling a good hugs (woah, we would never have guessed tumblr user cuddlingsun)

66. Lips or eyes: eyes i guess?? 

67. Shorter or taller: taller??? look I don’t Know these things 

68. Older or younger: probably older??? but also like younger is fine??? idk

70. Nice arms or nice stomach: I DON’T KNOW EITHER HANA whichever one that person wants??? like i’m not very specific on these things

71. Sensitive or loud: sensitive I guess but like hana said, you could be both

72. Hook up or relationship: relationship lmao what would i get out of a hookup except for years of pining

73. Troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant, but also a teeny bit mischievous otherwise i’d get bored  --------- keeping hana’s answer here

HAVE YOU EVER… 74. Kissed a stranger?: nope

75. Drank hard liquor?: nope

76. Lost glasses contact/lenses: i lost a lens once when i slept with them in accidently, but later found it on my pillow (i think) which was quite odd

77. Turned someone down: HA if we’re HONEST yes but like,,, i was twelve,,, he was weird,,, let’s forget it ever happened 

78. Sex on first date: um no -- hana catching my feelings perfectly

79. Broken someone’s heart: well that would be a maybe but i hope not lmao

80. Had your heart broken: L M A O yes way too easily

81. Been arrested: nope

82. Cried when someone died: yes, though it usually takes other people crying for me to Get There

83. Fallen for a friend: yes? no? idk what came first but honestly i’d like to have it be a friend rather than a stranger lmao

DO YOU BELIEVE IN… 84. Yourself: in all honesty no, but i’m trying to

85. Miracles: yes, in a way

86. Love at first sight: sort of?? like not love exactly but a feeling that turns into actual love yeah that’s possible i guess 

87. Santa Claus: nope, but i dont remember if i ever believed in him to begin with so i should ask me mum probably

88. Kiss on the first date: idk??? 

89. Angels: yeah i mean yeah with the religion thing and stuff i guess that’s a yes 

OTHER… 90. Current best friend’s name: honestly idk like i have many best friends and i don’t really have a solid best friend anymore but that’s fine because i lov so many people anyway

91. Eye colour: also brown

92. Favourite movie: don’t??? but all righty some time ago i’d have said spongebob the movie so that, hidden figures, prisoner of azkaban, dead poets society, brave (also pride and prejudice & austenland probably)

i tag @bothhappy--andsad because she usually wants to do these kinds of tags and if they want to: @ryanperch @floralaesthetlc @klainederful cus u guys are super cool and i wanna know if you care to do it (and anyone else that wants to do it can say i tagged them cus i wanna READ)