#i even held it together when the sheriff updated us and confirmed they were retrieving a found body
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#personal#...#this is the second time I've lost a friend to drowing in a large body of water while they were with a group and got separated...#we just received confirmation his body was recovered at 9:30pm. it's currently 12:40am.#we had formal and informal searches ongoing since yesterday afternoon...#I was out hiking along the river with different seaech groups all day today...#I'm really tired and just need to put my feelings into the digital void i guess since I don't really do actual social media#i managed to mostly keep myself together the whole day and focus my energy on the search#i even held it together when the sheriff updated us and confirmed they were retrieving a found body#but once I got home and saw the updated news segment with his photos and heard the news caster say his name and death... i fucking broke#I've just been crying on and off the last 3 hours because my brain keeps rapidly flipping between feeling surreal and feeling very real#i wish there was more i could do. i wish this wasn't happening again.
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