#i had to consciously make that decision every year. even more so when brexit hit

[queer-crusader]

Man I've run right out of spoons. Fucking despise shopping. Never again. Goodbye free time for the next 2 weeks now apart from MAYBE the coming weekend, wish me luck lads

[epicfics]

Humans Fic: 15 After Zero - 1) Know My Name

A/N: I wasn’t sure whether I should try this, as it’s so unorthodox. But my blog was feeling stale, so I did it anyways!

I’m sorry if I get the British educational system messed up, I tried to be as vague as possible but some things you can’t fake.

My name is Louisa Bell. I like football and electronica, and my favourite colour is red.

I recite these things like an actress, loud enough for a fly on the wall to hear, but not my mother. But even as I speak to the girl in the mirror, she mocks me with silence, her dark curls and hazel eyes stripping every word of it into a lie. Even the last bit – I doubt you’ll ever be so unfortunate to need to lie about your favourite colour.

But for me, the world is held together by a connected sharpness; the pitch of black, the blinding of white, and every vivid detail in between. There is no simple answer for anything.

Tension clenching my shoulders like claws, I close my eyes and allow my mind to run backwards in time. Memories flicker like brief commercials, until I settle upon one of Sophie Hawkins. Her medium-length hair is plaited back, displaying the silver chain around her neck – I’d given her the heart charm myself just before she left for university. With a wistful smile, she says, “This planet doesn’t need more people like me. It needs more like you.” Easy words for a girl who grew up like a flower under a sunbeam. I had about all the optimism of a lemon. And there isn’t enough sugar in the world for Sophie to sweeten that into lemonade.

I open my eyes to a bedroom that looks like the aftermath of a disaster film, surrounded by clothes that haven’t yet made it to the wash, and unlikely ever will. Household-cleaning Synthetics had stopped being manufactured altogether when I was seven. When the war hit its peak.

Mum reminds me it’s not safe to start attending school now. Some groups of Green-Eyed Synths are more radical than others, and I cannot speak against them or I will be in danger. I cannot speak for them, or I will be in danger.

“Lou?” Mum’s distant summons from the foyer is expected, as is what follows. “I’m not kidding around – if you want to stay home, feel free to just ignore me.”

Understandably, the situation has made her a bit terse. The news has never been easy on us, but when justice for Day Zero had at last been fully served two years ago, we’d needed to relocate to Bristol. In London, our name has spread like a virus through every district, and my last act before we moved away had been to temporarily paralyse a boy in another class that was organising a guerrilla-style revolt on a Synth army. Undoubtedly, here as Louisa Bell I would be commended for using my skill with pressure points to prevent tragedy. I would be famous as a holistic medicine practitioner rather than a crossbred creature.

“Louisa!”

I sigh, looking at the face in the mirror one more time. My father’s face.

My favorite colour is a prism. I like sharp objects and fire, and the sound of water crashing with the wind makes me feel alive. My name is Louisa Hawkins, and when I grow up I want people to know it.

 *** 

From Google Maps, Bristol looks largely like one large postcard-ready suburban utopia. Our neighbourhood seems to have sprung up out of a golf course. The school is a pile of neatly-stacked copper coloured bricks on a patch of black concrete. Mum sits in the driver’s seat of our parked compact car, shaking her head.

“What?” I ask her, ready to get out.

She mutters, “It looks like Waltringham.”

Waltringham, one of the earlier Synth free communities in England. Or as my grandmother calls it, Pleasantville 2020.

“Cool,” I say, blatantly nonchalant, opening the door with a click and a punch.

“Lulu?” I turn my head at the sound of my nickname. She uses it whenever she’s thinking about my father. But I know what she’s worried about.

I step out of the car and say, “I promise, Mum. I know what’s at stake this time.”

“Actually, I was gonna say…” she drew a breath. “It might not be worth it. You shouldn’t have to force yourself into this other person. It’s not healthy.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” I tell her, although I also want to laugh. Does anyone tell a chameleon not to change.

It’s only the third time we’ve been through this. Each year I make a mistake that pushes me further towards prison. And my father is not in prison anymore.

I can’t meet him if he doesn’t know where to find me.

I slam the car door shut and make my march toward Pleasantville 2.0.

 *** 

Contrary to my mother’s anxiety, the only fear I really had for today was being underdressed. I was expecting tidy jumpers and slacks, rather than biker jackets and jeans. Thankfully, I’m not entirely out of place here.

My classes run by quietly. Only when teacher announces discussion groups for current events does a knot in my stomach start stretching, waiting. We’re to choose a freestyle debate topic – an insane idea, really, as a band of fourteen-year olds might not grasp logic before passion in arguments better than some college kids can.

To my right, Owen is scribbling our ideas onto scrap paper. “New taxes. Continuing effects of Brexit. Copyright rules on fan-generated media.” He frowns. “No one’s gonna suggest resolution for the Green-Eye War?”

Well, I’d known that was coming. To be cool, I raise my eyebrows patronisingly and say, “I’d rather avoid starting a war in here.”

Clearly confused, Owen asks, “But who here’d want to side with the Synths?”

“You tell me, if you’re the one who wants to do a two-sided debate on it.”

“She’s got you in one, Owen,” says the girl on my right. Veronica. Striking, with dark red hair, and fair skin surrounding ruby lips and eyes as blue as a swimming pool. “Although, I don’t know why we’d rather spare this box of morons when anarchy is so much more fun.”

Her eyes catch mine, and she winks. And…I’m in love.

“Right, well because you said it,” sighs Owen, circling a topic. “Copyright issues it is. “Veronica will be on the side of the Internet, I’ll take on the concerns of the copyright - .”

She warns, “I will slaughter you.”

Showing no sign of fear, Owen then points at me, “Louisa, is it? You’ll play moderator.”

I twist my lips in frustration. I should be used to this designation as my former classmates refused to allow me more active participation, but still. New school, new rules.  “You reckon I’ll be better at listening to you both argue than having my own say?”

��What, you know right now already you’ll be good at this debate?” says Owen, pushing his glasses to the bridge of his nose. He stares at me in doubt.

“Probably. I’m good at everything.”

“Bully for you.” He groans, and then says to Veronica, “I suppose that’s the real debate right here.”

Veronica laughs, the sound bearing the carefree joy of a child. “Can you blame her though? You just went about putting us all in our places without any help.”

Looking as helpless as though Veronica paralysed him with pressure points herself, Owen snaps, “Okay. It’s Anarchy, 1 at Law and Order, 0. Little Miss Good-at-Everything gets to play the side of the copyright holders.” Then he leaves us to report our decision.

I smile sweetly in his direction and say softly, “Such a nice guy.”

Veronica snorts at this. “You can take the position of the content creators. I don’t mind a challenge.”

“Neither do I,” I confess. And while her smile warms me, I also think, I have no experience with the subject. I’ve never done anything creative in my life. In truth, I would be better moderating the debate between Veronica and Owen. But I hate it when my choices are made for me.

“By the way,” Veronica interrupts my thoughts. “That classroom war over the Synths? Already happened last year.”

I take care to ensure my tone is neutral before asking, “How did it end?”

Veronica smirks. “Bloody. About half of us wanted to crack down and use government resources to research a way to shut down all of their systems externally. Of course, there’s no telling how such a hack through that electronic network would affect other co-existing electronic networks. Your smart microwave could turn on and blow up your house!”

I shudder at this, but Veronica continues, “The rest of us, being the awesome freaks that we were, suggested looking for a truce with Leo Elster. Since, you know, he’s got some sway for all of it, being the son of the man that created them ,and the mastermind of Day Zero.”

Mastermind? There was no mastermind of Day Zero. Only a girl trying to save a Synth’s life, and later on a boy trying to save hers.

Does he have that much influence over the warring Synths, though? Doubtful, or there would be nothing to fight about now. But then, he’s only been out of prison for two years, thanks to my grandmother Laura’s strenuous efforts to get his sentenced reduced. For all I know, he could be starting a change.

I’ve never met Leo Elster. He was arrested before I was born. He claimed responsibility for delivering consciousness to every Synth on the planet so my mother didn’t have to. I’m not supposed to see him yet, not until Mum has deemed us safe. With who we are haunting our shadows, we’ll never be safe. Yet still, Veronica’s endorsement on his behalf makes me want to run out and find him. And maybe grab her by the arm and take her with me?

I want to say all this aloud and more. But with Owen returning, I shrug instead. “I wouldn’t know anything about it.”

Inwardly cringing from Veronica’s crestfallen expression, I open my notebook and write, Why Copywriters Should Negotiate a Truce –

I stop, rereading what I’ve just jotted down.

Maybe Leo Elster can negotiate a truce. Or maybe I can. With him. Because with the girl sitting next to me as living proof that there are humans with goodwill towards conscious Synthetics, I realise I may be able to reach people in a way that he, closed off as he is, cannot.

Forget what Mum said. By the synthetic additive in my DNA, I’ll find my father all on my own.

to be continued

[sailorrrvenus]

Shooting Dreams and Nightmares: An Interview with the Bragdon Brothers

Great photography tells a compelling story. Weaving narrative into photos and photo series is a challenging task — the storyteller cannot simply make the world conform to their imagination as the author or painter can. Photographers only have one frame to convey meaning — motion and action have to be paraphrased and the moment of transformation captured.

The limitations of physical reality and framing a decisive moment to tell a tale are what makes being a good photographic storyteller so hard. You need to think laterally, as your story relies heavily on the imagination and subconscious mind of the audience, much like infiltrating someone’s dreams.

Gareth (above, at left) and Gavin (above, at right) Bragdon are two street photographers who do this artfully. It’s unusual to find someone who performs this effectively, let alone two brother’s whose work compliments each other in a style that blends dreams with nightmares, emphasizing the surreal aspects of the everyday. There is a meaning in here, but just like in a dream the meaning is unclear and muddled- strange things are illuminated people become alien lifeforms, and life the world becomes a surreal and scary place.

I interviewed them to divine some understanding of these surreal images they create.

James Cater (to Gavin): On your old blog you wrote that “I can easily see commonalities between my handwriting, photography, music, drawing and so on…for example, I tend to favor delay/reverb which to me would be the sonic equivalents to photography’s slow shutter speeds, multiple exposures, blur and the like.” This is an interesting way for an artist to find their element in photo taking — by looking outside the photographic art to find their ‘punctum’ as you called it. Things have definitely developed since this, but what kind of art outside of photography continues to influence your style?

Gavin: I would definitely say movies/TV…in fact, maybe more so than other photography itself. Books as well. My favorite genre for all of those tends to be science fiction as well horror if it’s well done, you know focuses more on the eerie, uncanny, surreal, atmosphere and so on. And at least nowadays, consciously or subconsciously those are the sort of things I try to capture.

And I think it reflects the real world at the moment. We are living in a sort of sci-fi/horror. Everything seems off-kilter, unwinding, surreal, not quite real, this twilight zone. You got Donald Trump, of course, Britain is committing suicide with Brexit because it’s collectively lost its mind, you got other similar movements popping up in other countries. There’s also the effects of climate change becoming more and more tangible. We’re in a very weird and dark place right now.

(To Gavin) Many of your photos look like they are from stills the X-Files. How are you influenced by the paranormal or surrealism?

Gavin: As far as the former goes, when my brother and I were kids we spent a lot of time reading about the paranormal- ghosts, UFOs, cryptids and so on. I suppose that came from the fact that unlike many other kids our age, we never were able to watch say Friday the 13th or the Freddy Kruger movies. I think all kids have something of a need for horror and scares of some kinds, so for us, the books and shows about the paranormal supplemented that. The only difference was that, supposedly, what we were into was non-fiction. And there is something very surreal about the paranormal versus Hollywood horror.

Incidentally, we were/are planning to do a documentary project on “paranormal culture” if you will, in Scotland, you know tagging along with ghost hunters, UFO watchers and the like. Because of circumstances involving my brother’s illness, its been shelved for the time being but as soon as he’s in a better state its something I really look forward to jumping into.

(To Gavin) Do you have any experiences with extra-terrestrial life forms, or do you have any beliefs that some may consider ‘fringe’ or conspiratorial?

Gavin: I tend to be agnostic about the paranormal/unexplained. I tend to think there is “something” that happens, like what we think of as ghosts or alien spacecraft are things that are real in a way – that something is happening, and not just a bunch of lies or sightings of Venus/swamp gas (some of the skeptical explanations are just as ridiculous and far-fetched as the explanations of some of the most out there “believers”). But of course, yeah, there is a lot of bullshit out there.

Ghosts and UFOs and so on seem almost like glitches in the Matrix…they don’t belong in our rational, scientific natural world and yet there they are. What are they? Are they what they seem at face value? I mean even if none of it is real, I still find fascinating to think that maybe there is a thin membrane between our natural/rational world and others that leaks over sometimes. If it is all a modern form of mythology, then it’s a fascinating one.

I can say I have a short handful of what would be considered paranormal experiences, things that I can’t explain otherwise. And believe me, I wrack my brain for alternatives because I don’t want to go around believing I had an “experience” for the sake of it. I have seen what I believe was UFO once, its small fry stuff, but it’s one I really can’t explain. Basically, it looked a bit like a star flying around in erratic patterns around a larger and brighter star before the former seemed to disappear into the latter, which then just stayed there like a star or planet would. It’s a weird one and doesn’t even quite make sense as an alien spacecraft much less anything natural.

(To Gavin) How did you shoot this? Was it come across by accident with no explanation? What is the back story to this pic?

Gavin: I did indeed come across this by accident, as to what is really going on…I feel in this case it is best to say a magician never reveals his secrets. In some cases, I think the photo is best served by keeping the back story to one’s self, to keep the mystery. This is the kind of shot I really really actually hope to find every time I go out and shoot. A scene that, when framed correctly, is truly surreal and creates its own bizarre reality as a photograph separate from what really transpired in life. I really wish I would come across stuff like this more often!

(To Gavin) How did you light this? Who is this person in the photo?

Gavin: This is actually a staged shot. Back in college, I was working a project about, incidentally, the paranormal and I was trying to create photos that sort of resembled allegedly real photos you find in books on the subject. This is my brother on a rooftop in Malta. I put the flash behind him and put the camera in P-mode on a high ISO. The camera exposes for the ambient light, so doesn’t know the flash is there so thus things the flash hit end up being overexposed and seem to glow. The eyes are just basic “light-dots” I added in Photoshop. My PS skills are quite basic actually.

(To Gavin) Is this lit with a flash? Or just natural light? How did you achieve this hyper-realistic look?

Gavin: Natural light. Very straight ahead shot, point and click. I didn’t do very much with it in post-processing so I figure the hyper-real look is just from the layers in the scene.

(To Gareth) From an except I read on your bio from Forward Thinking Museum, you mentioned that you were learning photography in the hope of becoming a photojournalist, I read also in a 121clicks article recently that you have been struggling with a diagnosis of Lyme disease. How has this impacted your aspirations?

Gareth: It’s honestly a bit painful and unimaginable at this point to think I once such aspirations. The interview with Forward Thinking Museum was done back in 2013. My symptoms had suddenly started in February of 2012. I was having hundreds of skipping heart beats a day, breathlessness, random dizziness attacks. All the doctors assured me these symptoms where simply being caused by “anxiety” and “panic attacks.” I constantly felt like I was one missed heartbeat away from death. Despite this, my fascination with photography was only growing and my will power was stronger than my fears. When I look back at my old B&W pictures I can really see that weird mixture of passion and physical discomfort of the time reflecting off the pictures themselves. Living like that was hell and I still have no idea how I managed to capture those pictures, study photography, work or be in a relationship well dealing with that shit. I was sick but I was also healthy enough to still dream. What I did not expect is how much worse I was going to get over the coming years. By 2015 I started having daily headaches and migraines and by 2017 I was deathly sick having memory problems and crippling fatigue. It was not till the eleventh hour that my invisible illness that made my body into a torture chamber was finally exposed and diagnosed. Right now I’m undergoing treatment, but it’s been very difficult and is a slow process. For right now all of my dreams aspirations are being kept in a metaphorical shoe box until I’m better.

(To Gareth) When I read the quote, “I think the streets will prepare me for future battlefields,” it made me thought of a Bruce Gilden video, where he is walking around NYC and talking about the really dangerous place is ‘right here’. In any disaster area, working as a journo, you have a press pass that gives you permission to take photos. But being just a shmuck with a camera means anyone can do what they want to you. With your in your face style of photography, what are some of the most interesting reactions you have inspired from an uninvited flash to the face?

Gareth: Shooting this way, of course you’re not invisible but most of the time the reactions are fine. Sometimes people laugh or say thank you if you compliment them, sometimes it elicits a conversation. Bizarrely enough, there are quite a few people who don’t seem to notice it. However and inevitably you will get the odd bad reaction. One time I shot this guy smoking a pipe. He literally punches the camera into my face and starts having this big go at me, saying he’s a lawyer, he’ll sue me blah blah blah.

I stood my ground saying what I was doing was not illegal but physically assaulting someone was, which is what he just did to me. Usually when you get a bad reaction or whatever I try to be apologetic or defuse the situation not always “stand my ground”, but when someone acts like that and starts getting physical over their photo being taken, then no. Anyway, I was later informed that this guy was a lawyer — in fact, an infamous one well-known for his hard unionist and anti-Catholic leanings. He’s been caught out singing sectarian songs and jokes. He’s a bigot. After learning that, I did not feel bad in the least for ruining his day.

(To Gareth) In your series “Breathing Mannequins” you bring a high fashion style to the streets. It seems with this series that the intention is to make photographs that contrast human skin to the unnatural covering of clothing. What inspired you to look at people this way and how did you learn to shoot in this way?

Gareth: When I was first exposed to street photography I was attracted to its unpredictability and the unforgiving nature. I remember trying to find the “decisive moment” when I first started shooting the streets and completely failing to capture anything compelling. It was not until a Halloween night when I decided to use the pop-up flash on my camera that I discovered the potential of the flash. Soon afterward I purchased a flash gun and a set of flash triggers.

Much of my inspiration to capture subjects up close and off guard came from looking at the work of a local street photographer and friend Paul Cruickshank. I was drawn in by the feeling of energy and intimacy in his pictures. Armed with my flash gun and lots of courage I began getting closer to subjects. The black and white lighting storms soon led to interesting results and further pursuit of that aesthetic.

When I was shooting in black and white I was thinking in black & white and looked for people and things that would fit the dark and eerie look. It was not till I reluctantly switched over to color that I begin to see the visual potential of the subjects that peacocked their way down Edinburgh’s busy high street. I was also simultaneously being inspired by the surrealistic color work of Guy Bourdin. I believe his work had an even greater impact on me than most of the well-known street photographers.

(To Gareth) Do you yourself wear clothing that draws attention to yourself, that sacrifice practicality for fashion?

Gareth: No, not deliberately unless my clothes are falling apart. I used to wear this leather jacket where the sleeve was torn to shreds, but I was too skint to replace it for ages. One of my friends said it looked like I’d been run over by a car. That’s as flashy as I get with my fashion.

(To Gareth) How much warning did you get to take this- did the umbrella reverse itself just as you hit the shutter?

Gareth: Not very much warning. I was crossing the street and the umbrella reversed itself right in front of me and it was thanks to fast reflexes that I was able to catch this at the drop of a hat.

(To Gareth) Did you know this guy before you took the photo? It looks as if you were just having a drink with him?

Gareth: This was in Monmarte in Paris. There was a camera crew around this guy and I just jumped into the middle of this crowd and took the photo. Had no idea who he was but was later told he is something like a famous owner of cabaret clubs or something like that. Some celebrity anyway.

(To Gareth) What is the story behind this wretched creature?

Gareth: I caught this just as its owner was about to pick it up into a taxi cab. It’s some sort of particular breed. No idea which.

(To Gareth) How was this lit? How did the copper react to you flashing his horse?

Gareth: Lit with an off-camera flash from under the horse’s snout. It was years ago I took this, but I don’t recall the cop really reacting. I guess sometimes you have to be careful with horses. Horses can scare the shit out of me sometimes.

(To Gareth) When putting together your portfolio or an exhibition, what do you look for? What are the themes or feelings that speak to you to create a series like Under Grey Skies?

Gareth: When we put together things like that, I suppose not only are we trying to pick strong individual photos, but also have a sort of consistency to them. Not necessarily something literal, or something you can express with words, but the sort of thing you can see coming together when you’re actually in the act of putting it all together. I suppose the same can often be said of when we have series like the one you mentioned. Like when those photos are taken, we’re usually just out to take photos, not necessarily with a particular theme in mind, not consciously anyway. It’s later on that you notice when you have enough of these pictures does the “theme” become apparent.

(To Both) What is a vivid dream that you can pull from recent memory?

Gareth: I had this really vivid dream recently that involved a really strange lighting storm with these sort of UFOs in the sky and everyone looking up at them and then this apparition of a girl appearing in the hallway. It was really eerie and a bit omen-y. Then the dream moved on to going to the theater with my brother and parents and having a bad feeling about it and getting us to leave in a taxi, only for it to bring us back to the theater which then gets attacked by these guys with samurai swords. One of those dreams where you end up feeling really weird when you wake up.

Gavin: I had a dream where I found out Karen O died from meningitis or something. I was proper tore up about it.

(To Both) Lastly, this wouldn’t be a photographer interview without a gear shot, so show me what you shoot with!

About the author: James Cater is a digital and analog photographer, film lab operator, and model. The opinions expressed in this article are solely those of the author. You can find more of Cater’s work on his website and Instagram. This article was also published here.

source https://petapixel.com/2019/04/01/shooting-dreams-and-nightmares-an-interview-with-the-bragdon-brothers/

[pauldeckerus]

Shooting Dreams and Nightmares: An Interview with the Bragdon Brothers

Great photography tells a compelling story. Weaving narrative into photos and photo series is a challenging task — the storyteller cannot simply make the world conform to their imagination as the author or painter can. Photographers only have one frame to convey meaning — motion and action have to be paraphrased and the moment of transformation captured.

The limitations of physical reality and framing a decisive moment to tell a tale are what makes being a good photographic storyteller so hard. You need to think laterally, as your story relies heavily on the imagination and subconscious mind of the audience, much like infiltrating someone’s dreams.

Gareth (above, at left) and Gavin (above, at right) Bragdon are two street photographers who do this artfully. It’s unusual to find someone who performs this effectively, let alone two brother’s whose work compliments each other in a style that blends dreams with nightmares, emphasizing the surreal aspects of the everyday. There is a meaning in here, but just like in a dream the meaning is unclear and muddled- strange things are illuminated people become alien lifeforms, and life the world becomes a surreal and scary place.

I interviewed them to divine some understanding of these surreal images they create.

James Cater (to Gavin): On your old blog you wrote that “I can easily see commonalities between my handwriting, photography, music, drawing and so on…for example, I tend to favor delay/reverb which to me would be the sonic equivalents to photography’s slow shutter speeds, multiple exposures, blur and the like.” This is an interesting way for an artist to find their element in photo taking — by looking outside the photographic art to find their ‘punctum’ as you called it. Things have definitely developed since this, but what kind of art outside of photography continues to influence your style?

Gavin: I would definitely say movies/TV…in fact, maybe more so than other photography itself. Books as well. My favorite genre for all of those tends to be science fiction as well horror if it’s well done, you know focuses more on the eerie, uncanny, surreal, atmosphere and so on. And at least nowadays, consciously or subconsciously those are the sort of things I try to capture.

And I think it reflects the real world at the moment. We are living in a sort of sci-fi/horror. Everything seems off-kilter, unwinding, surreal, not quite real, this twilight zone. You got Donald Trump, of course, Britain is committing suicide with Brexit because it’s collectively lost its mind, you got other similar movements popping up in other countries. There’s also the effects of climate change becoming more and more tangible. We’re in a very weird and dark place right now.

(To Gavin) Many of your photos look like they are from stills the X-Files. How are you influenced by the paranormal or surrealism?

Gavin: As far as the former goes, when my brother and I were kids we spent a lot of time reading about the paranormal- ghosts, UFOs, cryptids and so on. I suppose that came from the fact that unlike many other kids our age, we never were able to watch say Friday the 13th or the Freddy Kruger movies. I think all kids have something of a need for horror and scares of some kinds, so for us, the books and shows about the paranormal supplemented that. The only difference was that, supposedly, what we were into was non-fiction. And there is something very surreal about the paranormal versus Hollywood horror.

Incidentally, we were/are planning to do a documentary project on “paranormal culture” if you will, in Scotland, you know tagging along with ghost hunters, UFO watchers and the like. Because of circumstances involving my brother’s illness, its been shelved for the time being but as soon as he’s in a better state its something I really look forward to jumping into.

(To Gavin) Do you have any experiences with extra-terrestrial life forms, or do you have any beliefs that some may consider ‘fringe’ or conspiratorial?

Gavin: I tend to be agnostic about the paranormal/unexplained. I tend to think there is “something” that happens, like what we think of as ghosts or alien spacecraft are things that are real in a way – that something is happening, and not just a bunch of lies or sightings of Venus/swamp gas (some of the skeptical explanations are just as ridiculous and far-fetched as the explanations of some of the most out there “believers”). But of course, yeah, there is a lot of bullshit out there.

Ghosts and UFOs and so on seem almost like glitches in the Matrix…they don’t belong in our rational, scientific natural world and yet there they are. What are they? Are they what they seem at face value? I mean even if none of it is real, I still find fascinating to think that maybe there is a thin membrane between our natural/rational world and others that leaks over sometimes. If it is all a modern form of mythology, then it’s a fascinating one.

I can say I have a short handful of what would be considered paranormal experiences, things that I can’t explain otherwise. And believe me, I wrack my brain for alternatives because I don’t want to go around believing I had an “experience” for the sake of it. I have seen what I believe was UFO once, its small fry stuff, but it’s one I really can’t explain. Basically, it looked a bit like a star flying around in erratic patterns around a larger and brighter star before the former seemed to disappear into the latter, which then just stayed there like a star or planet would. It’s a weird one and doesn’t even quite make sense as an alien spacecraft much less anything natural.

(To Gavin) How did you shoot this? Was it come across by accident with no explanation? What is the back story to this pic?

Gavin: I did indeed come across this by accident, as to what is really going on…I feel in this case it is best to say a magician never reveals his secrets. In some cases, I think the photo is best served by keeping the back story to one’s self, to keep the mystery. This is the kind of shot I really really actually hope to find every time I go out and shoot. A scene that, when framed correctly, is truly surreal and creates its own bizarre reality as a photograph separate from what really transpired in life. I really wish I would come across stuff like this more often!

(To Gavin) How did you light this? Who is this person in the photo?

Gavin: This is actually a staged shot. Back in college, I was working a project about, incidentally, the paranormal and I was trying to create photos that sort of resembled allegedly real photos you find in books on the subject. This is my brother on a rooftop in Malta. I put the flash behind him and put the camera in P-mode on a high ISO. The camera exposes for the ambient light, so doesn’t know the flash is there so thus things the flash hit end up being overexposed and seem to glow. The eyes are just basic “light-dots” I added in Photoshop. My PS skills are quite basic actually.

(To Gavin) Is this lit with a flash? Or just natural light? How did you achieve this hyper-realistic look?

Gavin: Natural light. Very straight ahead shot, point and click. I didn’t do very much with it in post-processing so I figure the hyper-real look is just from the layers in the scene.

(To Gareth) From an except I read on your bio from Forward Thinking Museum, you mentioned that you were learning photography in the hope of becoming a photojournalist, I read also in a 121clicks article recently that you have been struggling with a diagnosis of Lyme disease. How has this impacted your aspirations?

Gareth: It’s honestly a bit painful and unimaginable at this point to think I once such aspirations. The interview with Forward Thinking Museum was done back in 2013. My symptoms had suddenly started in February of 2012. I was having hundreds of skipping heart beats a day, breathlessness, random dizziness attacks. All the doctors assured me these symptoms where simply being caused by “anxiety” and “panic attacks.” I constantly felt like I was one missed heartbeat away from death. Despite this, my fascination with photography was only growing and my will power was stronger than my fears. When I look back at my old B&W pictures I can really see that weird mixture of passion and physical discomfort of the time reflecting off the pictures themselves. Living like that was hell and I still have no idea how I managed to capture those pictures, study photography, work or be in a relationship well dealing with that shit. I was sick but I was also healthy enough to still dream. What I did not expect is how much worse I was going to get over the coming years. By 2015 I started having daily headaches and migraines and by 2017 I was deathly sick having memory problems and crippling fatigue. It was not till the eleventh hour that my invisible illness that made my body into a torture chamber was finally exposed and diagnosed. Right now I’m undergoing treatment, but it’s been very difficult and is a slow process. For right now all of my dreams aspirations are being kept in a metaphorical shoe box until I’m better.

(To Gareth) When I read the quote, “I think the streets will prepare me for future battlefields,” it made me thought of a Bruce Gilden video, where he is walking around NYC and talking about the really dangerous place is ‘right here’. In any disaster area, working as a journo, you have a press pass that gives you permission to take photos. But being just a shmuck with a camera means anyone can do what they want to you. With your in your face style of photography, what are some of the most interesting reactions you have inspired from an uninvited flash to the face?

Gareth: Shooting this way, of course you’re not invisible but most of the time the reactions are fine. Sometimes people laugh or say thank you if you compliment them, sometimes it elicits a conversation. Bizarrely enough, there are quite a few people who don’t seem to notice it. However and inevitably you will get the odd bad reaction. One time I shot this guy smoking a pipe. He literally punches the camera into my face and starts having this big go at me, saying he’s a lawyer, he’ll sue me blah blah blah.

I stood my ground saying what I was doing was not illegal but physically assaulting someone was, which is what he just did to me. Usually when you get a bad reaction or whatever I try to be apologetic or defuse the situation not always “stand my ground”, but when someone acts like that and starts getting physical over their photo being taken, then no. Anyway, I was later informed that this guy was a lawyer — in fact, an infamous one well-known for his hard unionist and anti-Catholic leanings. He’s been caught out singing sectarian songs and jokes. He’s a bigot. After learning that, I did not feel bad in the least for ruining his day.

(To Gareth) In your series “Breathing Mannequins” you bring a high fashion style to the streets. It seems with this series that the intention is to make photographs that contrast human skin to the unnatural covering of clothing. What inspired you to look at people this way and how did you learn to shoot in this way?

Gareth: When I was first exposed to street photography I was attracted to its unpredictability and the unforgiving nature. I remember trying to find the “decisive moment” when I first started shooting the streets and completely failing to capture anything compelling. It was not until a Halloween night when I decided to use the pop-up flash on my camera that I discovered the potential of the flash. Soon afterward I purchased a flash gun and a set of flash triggers.

Much of my inspiration to capture subjects up close and off guard came from looking at the work of a local street photographer and friend Paul Cruickshank. I was drawn in by the feeling of energy and intimacy in his pictures. Armed with my flash gun and lots of courage I began getting closer to subjects. The black and white lighting storms soon led to interesting results and further pursuit of that aesthetic.

When I was shooting in black and white I was thinking in black & white and looked for people and things that would fit the dark and eerie look. It was not till I reluctantly switched over to color that I begin to see the visual potential of the subjects that peacocked their way down Edinburgh’s busy high street. I was also simultaneously being inspired by the surrealistic color work of Guy Bourdin. I believe his work had an even greater impact on me than most of the well-known street photographers.

(To Gareth) Do you yourself wear clothing that draws attention to yourself, that sacrifice practicality for fashion?

Gareth: No, not deliberately unless my clothes are falling apart. I used to wear this leather jacket where the sleeve was torn to shreds, but I was too skint to replace it for ages. One of my friends said it looked like I’d been run over by a car. That’s as flashy as I get with my fashion.

(To Gareth) How much warning did you get to take this- did the umbrella reverse itself just as you hit the shutter?

Gareth: Not very much warning. I was crossing the street and the umbrella reversed itself right in front of me and it was thanks to fast reflexes that I was able to catch this at the drop of a hat.

(To Gareth) Did you know this guy before you took the photo? It looks as if you were just having a drink with him?

Gareth: This was in Monmarte in Paris. There was a camera crew around this guy and I just jumped into the middle of this crowd and took the photo. Had no idea who he was but was later told he is something like a famous owner of cabaret clubs or something like that. Some celebrity anyway.

(To Gareth) What is the story behind this wretched creature?

Gareth: I caught this just as its owner was about to pick it up into a taxi cab. It’s some sort of particular breed. No idea which.

(To Gareth) How was this lit? How did the copper react to you flashing his horse?

Gareth: Lit with an off-camera flash from under the horse’s snout. It was years ago I took this, but I don’t recall the cop really reacting. I guess sometimes you have to be careful with horses. Horses can scare the shit out of me sometimes.

(To Gareth) When putting together your portfolio or an exhibition, what do you look for? What are the themes or feelings that speak to you to create a series like Under Grey Skies?

Gareth: When we put together things like that, I suppose not only are we trying to pick strong individual photos, but also have a sort of consistency to them. Not necessarily something literal, or something you can express with words, but the sort of thing you can see coming together when you’re actually in the act of putting it all together. I suppose the same can often be said of when we have series like the one you mentioned. Like when those photos are taken, we’re usually just out to take photos, not necessarily with a particular theme in mind, not consciously anyway. It’s later on that you notice when you have enough of these pictures does the “theme” become apparent.

(To Both) What is a vivid dream that you can pull from recent memory?

Gareth: I had this really vivid dream recently that involved a really strange lighting storm with these sort of UFOs in the sky and everyone looking up at them and then this apparition of a girl appearing in the hallway. It was really eerie and a bit omen-y. Then the dream moved on to going to the theater with my brother and parents and having a bad feeling about it and getting us to leave in a taxi, only for it to bring us back to the theater which then gets attacked by these guys with samurai swords. One of those dreams where you end up feeling really weird when you wake up.

Gavin: I had a dream where I found out Karen O died from meningitis or something. I was proper tore up about it.

(To Both) Lastly, this wouldn’t be a photographer interview without a gear shot, so show me what you shoot with!

About the author: James Cater is a digital and analog photographer, film lab operator, and model. The opinions expressed in this article are solely those of the author. You can find more of Cater’s work on his website and Instagram. This article was also published here.

from Photography News https://petapixel.com/2019/04/01/shooting-dreams-and-nightmares-an-interview-with-the-bragdon-brothers/

[kroncreative-blog]

Top 10 Saviours of 2016

I’d like to start off 2017 by taking a brief trip down the 2016 section of memory lane. 

2016 was a mind trip of a year. From the stacks of shocking political moves, across the globe, to the sheer number of legends taken from us, this year has been a lot.  On a personal level, the trials and tribulations of the year were made a little easier because I started dabbling in a little self care. It wasn’t a conscious decision: it just kinda happened. Some of my fav artists dropped gems, lost a little weight, started sleeping a little more. These all helped pull me through. They were so helpful in fact that I am bringing some into 2017. So here is a list of my top 10 saviours of 2016. 1. Lemonade by Beyoncé Unless, it has not yet been made clear, I am a HUGE Beyoncé fan.  This album and accompanying film was easily one of the highlights of my life never mind year. The album itself is a stunning showcase of Beyoncé’s range and ability - not that we needed any more reminding. ‘Freedom’ and ‘Sorry’ are two of my personal favourites from the album. The visual element of this album is simply beautiful. The way Warsan Shire’s words and the imagery were weaved together was just out of this world.  One of my absolute favourite things about this Bey project though? Was seeing the joy and elevation it brought to the Black women in my life and those I follow online. It was genuinely a heart warming thing to see.  2. ANTI by Rihanna The release of Rihanna’s eighth album at the top of the year was an absolute delight.  One of the highlights of this album was actually the way the album was promoted. The launch of ANTIdiaRy in November and all of the rooms really helped build up hype which this album DEFINITELY followed up on. “Higher”,  “Love on the Brain” and “Kiss it Better” are my jams.  A particular shout out to the opening track “Consideration” with SZA. The way their vocals merge together is like honey.  This album really made me feel like Rihanna is an artist who even with eight studio albums behind her has not yet peaked.  3. Giovanni’s Room by James Baldwin Embarrassingly, despite having a degree in English Lit, 2016 was the first time I had picked up this book by Baldwin. And flipping heck! Why this book is not taught as part of the school curriculum is a down right mystery to me.  The way Baldwin writes is simply astounding. In Giovanni’s Room he deals with the complexities of David’s relationship with Giovanni and others around him in such a palpable way. His articulation of David’s immersion in French culture, his love for Giovanni and in particular Giovanni’s love for David are highly emotive. I felt as if I was going through these experiences with David. Such is the capability of Baldwin.  “I thought of the people before me who had looked down at the river and gone to sleep beneath it. I wondered about them. I wondered how they had done it--it, the physical act. I simply wondered about the dead because their days had ended and I did not know how I would get through mine.”  4. 6,741, S05E04, Person of Interest I could, and perhaps at some point will write an entire in depth blog post on this exhilarating episode, but it was too important to miss out of this list. This was one of the most highly anticipated episodes of this season as it marked the return of Sameen Shaw (played by Sarah Shahi). 

6741 is a mind bender and mirrors the episode If-Then-Else which marked Shahi’s temporary departure from the show.  The way this episode was directed by Chris Fisher and written by Lucas O’Connor and Denise Thé and the concept of it is just phenomenal. Also shout out to Shahi’s fantastic acting skills which heightened the impact of this highly emotive hour of tv. One of the most beautiful aspects of it was the exploration of the depth of Shaw’s feelings for Root. The use of simulation to expose the audience to this was not only creative AF but inline with Shaw’s type II personality disorder.  “Do you know where we are? What they did to me? The torture? I told you I couldn’t escape it. But when things got to be too bad there was one place I would go to in my mind. Here. With you. You were my safe place.” 5. Grayish Black by Devyn Springer I received this poetry collection as a present from a good friend. And my days! What a present it turned out to be.  Everything about this poetry collection is stunning. The cover is black which is intentional. “Your fingerprints are all over this book now. It is all you can see across all the cover.” There is something about this notion that personalises the collection straight away and immediately makes it feel more intimate.  Something which builds upon this intimacy, is the photographs. When I first flicked through, the photographs took me surprise. I don’t think I’ve ever seen photographs in a poetry collection before. There’s also photocopies of some of Springer’s poetry/stream of consciousness/drawings which again add to the intimacy of this collection. The actual poetry though? I found it to be very raw and extremely evocative. There were a few instances where I had to close the book and set it down and come back to it later because the feelings brought to the surface were just too much (in a good way). But such is the power of Springer’s writing. Just so damn beautiful and breathtakingly honest. Again this is probably another piece where I will have to do an in depth blog post just to encourage people to go out and buy this piece and read it. 

“It seems all of the things I hate about myself have latched their claws into my skin, planted seeds in my bone marrow,  built hones in between my ribs, and decided to stay for a while.” 6. Dreamland by Mic Righteous This is one of my many musical highlights of 2016. Not only because I have been waiting for this album for the longest time but because it was entirely worth the wait. Straight out of Margate, Mic Righteous has an undeniable talent. His flow is effortless and his wordplay is genius. And his storytelling ability is insane. Every track on this album tells a story, just a tiny segment of different aspects of his journey. Highlighting his difficult childhood in Margate to his outsider status in the UK Scene.

This album also has a strong set of accompanying videos. Not every track has a video but some of my personal favourites are the passion filled ‘Gone’, party vid, ‘I Turn Up’ and the highly personal ‘Kids’. Stand out tracks are ‘All Dressed Up’ and anthem ‘Tempo of the Dance’. This is an album that you’ll just have to check it out for yourself. 

“My family don't get why I'm dead broke I'm deffo on my arse I guess that's the tempo of the dance I'm certain of my future like a psychic read a palm Maybe it's the patience that's ringin' red alarms I don't wanna see a sceptic have the last laugh Nearly spent seven years to perfect my every part Thinkin' of my examples and I don't get very far Because not many of them last or achieve What they set out from the start Selling out, dwellin' on what could be I live to prove people wrong because they overlook me I live to see my son smile, father livin' cushty” 

7. The Friendzone Podcast Hosted by Dustin, Assanté and Fran, this is one of my favourite podcasts and it’s one that just keeps getting better and better.  As is no secret to anyone, 2016 was hard. But this endearing yet hilarious podcast was something that helped keep me grounded and not get too consumed by the nonsense of this year.  This podcast is primarily concerned with “mental health, mental wellness and mental hygiene because who in the hell wants a musty brain?” Every weekend brings a wellness segment brought to you by Fran of Hey Fran Hey fame which aims to help you increase your wellness. One of the coolest things about this wellness segment is that everything that is recommended is trusted and used personally by Fran. Not only that the segment is well informed providing scientific research where necessary. Some of the things I have incorporated from the show are Palo Santo, weighted blankets, journal work and the Forest Productivity app.  Assanté is the musical maestro bringing us musical recommendations and has put me onto some flames music including Isaiah Rashad and Xavier Omär. His vulnerability adds an extra layer of familiarity to the show. 

Dustin. Sir Dustin is a law unto himself and keeps the show real and hilarious. His speciality segment is reality tv. Every week he gives the lowdown on shows such as Married to Medicine Atlanta and the Real Housewives franchise. His knowledge is encyclopaedic. Also the intro freestyle every week has a special place in my heart. Its literally lit every week and I haven’t heard a dud one yet.  8. Coloring Book by Chance The Rapper Listen. I was BEYOND hype about ‘Chance 3′ since I first heard ‘Ultralight Beam’. Which was also a freaking bop! It was so much of a bop in fact that I am yet to listen to the rest of TLOP. And my favourite part about it was Chance’s verse. Anyway, back to Coloring Book.

Coloring Book is beyond amazing. I am in love with the mixtape, the cover, Chance’s voice, the beats, the production, EVERYTHING. Chance even had me singing along with Bieber in ‘Juke Jam’.

Even though I’m not a Christian I really love the Gospel influence and features on the mixtape. Although the presence of Gospel in Hip-Hop/Rap is not new, I feel like Chance really elevated it. And his level of faith is inspiring.  Every single track is astounding. And to be honest, I know that I’m going to be listening to this for a very long time. I also know that there are not enough words for me to do this mixtape justice.  9. The Good Immigrant edited by Nikesh Shukla With Brexit and the election of Donald Trump largely played to the tune of ‘fear the foreigner’ 2016 has taken a toll on this particular second generation immigrant.  Just when the rhetoric of British Values began to feel like almost like a vaguely defined threat, this little gem came along. This collection of 21 essays hit me right in the heart. These essays represent and validate the breadth of the experience of immigrants in this here United Kingdom. The blurb boldly asks “What’s it like to live in a country that doesn’t trust you and doesn’t want you unless you won an Olympic gold medal or a national baking competition?” Although it is worth noting that even these people have been exempt from racism.  Anyway, pretty much every essay in this book was relatable and made me feel some form of validation and acceptance. One essay which resonated with me deeply in particular is ‘Going Home’ by Kieran Yates. Yates details her perspective of the British Asian experience and learning how to navigate society, family and personal spaces and all the spaces within these spaces. The difficulties which sometimes arise like the ability to make a round roti. Yates highlights how she doesn’t feel a split between her Indian culture and British culture when she can take the best bits of both. “But for me, there is no neat duality; no neatly sliced elements of my identity that are in opposition. There is no hollow insecurity about rootlessness because these additional details and stories I’ve learned are additions to our identity, not losses.” This is something that took mea long time to realise and I’m still learning to be entirely honest.

10. The Get Down, Netflix Oh My Goodness. 

This series yeah? This series is already one of my fav tv shows ever.  Anyone, who knows me, knows I love Hip-Hop. This musical series loosely explores the origins of this spectacular and beautiful art form including, DJing, Graffiti, B-Boying and of course rap. It stars Justice Smith, Shameik Moore and Jaden Smith. The show was created by Baz Luhrmann and Stephen Adly Guirgis. I can’t lie, as soon as I heard Luhrmann’s name I was sceptical. I mean I love Moulin Rouge and his adaptation of Romeo and Juliet but I wasn’t sure how this would translate to 70s South Bronx. I was wrong, this series is visually gorgeous.  The raps in this series are largely written by Nas. Not only does this make the series feel more genuine but it made me fall in love with Nas’s own discography again. It also reminded me of the poetic nature and roots of Hip-Hop. There is a scene of Zeke’s teacher reciting one of his pieces to him in the opening episode and it is just breath taking. One of my favourite things about this series though, even though it deals with some really heavy social issues, it is infectiously hopeful. It can’t help but inspiring hope and looking forward. I feel like, in the coming months, this is something we will all need more of.