#i hold my opinions bc i believe in them so ofc i should be allowed to endorse them! even over silly books!!!

[soldier-poet-king]

Moral purity OCD ever send u into a spiral so bad at work u nearly miss lunch and don't do ur literal job

Instead u spend literally hours reading critical book reviews and working yourself up because oh god oh no someone said something was problematic about a book/show/etc that you love deeply and now ur brain is convinced ur a terrible bad demon person? For consuming the Problematic Content? Even tho in your saner moments you realize this is stupid and the internet has NO capacity for nuance and SURELY there's a middle ground between "I said this was problematic (without basis) and youre morally impure for enjoying it" and "there's is no such thing as privilege or racism or appropriation" SURELY

I also have to stop letting my flight or fight send me into obsessive spirals it's like. Who tf cares if this internet person with poorly formed opinions thinks [thing you love] is problematic! 1) they're probably not correct, but formed out of bad faith internet discourse 2) even if they are correct, problematic isn't contagious and you aren't morally impure for reading smthn supposedly problematic 3) your OCD is morphing a genuine concern about cultural and racial issues into self flagellation because ur white, the same way it takes minor tenents of Christianity and spins them into ways for you to punish and/or damn yourself. 4) disagreement doesn't need to be conflict or mean your bad and wrong. The internet has no nuance and treast disagreement as moral impurity. You were raised in a dysfunctional family where you still live and were trained to see the slightest disagreement or tone of voice as a danger so that is also making the obsessions and fear worse. It's a brain disease.

But also WHAT IF???

Tldr My specific neuroses feed on and magnify the internets lack of nuance or ability to think critically making me convinced I'm a terrible bad person for believing in my ideals and my heart and duty and Goodness, and this leads to a existential pessimism spiral where everything is meaningless and I have no purpose but ALSO I have to punish myself and go to great lengths to prove I'm not A Bad Person because nothing is worse than being a Bad Person (defined by what metrics? Oh that would be too easy, it changes every OCD episode)

[sakkac]

re: fumetsu no anata e as of chapter 139.2

this started as a response to @bestbonnist​‘s post on chapter 139.2 but now i’m just dissecting differences and similarities between tonari, mizuha, and kahak like im writing an essay for a uni class. i interchangeably use he/they pronouns for fushi and my writing may be clumsy (bc im not actually writing for uni ❤️).

mizuha is a broken mirror to tonari (and kahak a foil to the two aforementioned) in this modern-day arc, especially in their expressions of love for fushi. tonari’s love for fushi is aged over hundreds of years and mizuha’s, at first glance, is an infatuation just based on how long they’ve known each other. im the biggest kahak stan ever, but even i understand kahak’s love started as an infatuation for parona’s form. though, i’d consider the word infatuation compromised when it comes to defining mizuha’s love, bc u cant be sure if her love for fushi is entirely her own, seeing as it had been passed from generation to generation of guardians.

(chapter 134, read right to left)

tonari and mizuha aren’t that different once you look deeply into the both of them. mizuha’s personality and actions are factors in tonari’s dislike of her, but what ultimately repels tonari from mizuha is that she knows they’re similar, and that manifests most clearly in how she reacts to fushi being with mizuha. i.e. resenting fushi for using her friends’ vessels to help their “love life” in chapter 135.5. she can’t stand mizuha bc mizuha is able to express her love for fushi and fushi does not reject (or accept) it; tonari still hasn’t fully admitted to herself that she likes fushi romantically (perhaps because she can’t separate it from the devotion that led her to harden her body to poisons and to promise her corpse to rest at fushi’s feet), so seeing mizuha appear to progress further than she has irritates her. as for kahak, tonari only has the biases of the other pseudo-immortals and her own of past hayase reincarnations to rely on. (this is not as plot-related, but these two also both like books. kahak read tonari’s fushi book, so i wish they actually met, but in a world where tonari didnt hate hayase beyond death.)

tonari as a child seemed like she thought herself superior to others, perhaps a natural result of her upbringing. she was raised on a prison island, but she herself never committed any crime; banding together w other kids like her, writing about her life in her book (which keeps her separate from or above others in a way). but this thinking ceases at her relationship w fushi. however, i believe this started before they even met. tonari’s childhood dream at seven years old was to write a book her father would be impressed by. she also used to believe in god, while her family was still whole. she even prayed to god when he decided to participate in the tournament in chapter 35. however, she stops referring to god by the time her father had shown tarnish. coincidentally, she meets fushi, who would “upend everything... jeannanda and [her] fate.” she ends up, instead of writing for her father, writing a book to allow a peaceful existence for fushi for whenever they decided to come back. this act shows that the adult tonari has written fushi to a level above her, out of her reach. 

(chapter 35)

here i’ll quote ray’s words about kahak and tonari: “she also has a surprising amount in common with Kahaku, too, with the ‘I want to protect you even if you disagree.’” the way tonari had waited and honed her body for fushi resembles kahak’s attachment; she had finished living for herself, so now she was only allowing herself to live to further create an ideal vessel for fushi (which also brings up one of hayase’s goals). the difference is that kahak lived for fushi because, as raikkousaki said, fushi was the only thing he was “ALLOWED to live for.” however, while tonari is unquestionably devoted to fushi now, what pulled her to him was black hood’s coercion. as a result of black hood’s words to her, she manipulated fushi into helping her solve her problems, to save her from the island. this first “meeting” also revealed that she was attracted to their white hair; she later admits that she admires their fair skin, contributing to the idea that she could view fushi as the equivalent of a god or at the least, a vision of purity (which is :/ imo, bc of her dark skin). we should also keep in mind that, this, technically her first impression of fushi, and his later display of violent immortality in the arena would further his image as a “legend.” 

mizuha was exposed to fushi’s immortality and reveres him like tonari and kahak respectively do and did. instead of the specific word “legend,” it’s “immortal monster.” her first formal exposure to fushi’s fabled power was not unlike tonari’s, since mizuha had went into her grandfather’s library and read on fushi in chapter 124.1. after this, she manipulates fushi to save her, again paralleling the beginning of tonari’s relationship with fushi, but it’s from her overbearing mother and herself. both tonari and mizuha forced their problems onto fushi, but mizuha doesn’t have black hood stepping in front of her saying “you must lead him.” instead, she may have been influenced by the left hand, but i believe mizuha’s thoughts are majorly her own (left hand lies in wait within mizuha’s consciousness like a predator), and what they appear to say is that she’s leading fushi until he decides to follow her willingly. as for kahak, we only have a few pages on his childhood and what we can make of it and of his actions as an adult is that he was willing to follow fushi wherever they went, until left hand betrayed them both.

mizuha’s superiority complex comes from a different place than young tonari’s; she was a prestigious child from young, in addition to her fear of her uniqueness fading as she aged. this caused her to feel separate from other children. when she meets fushi, she sees how different he is from everyone else and uses subtle ways to keep him with her, while never directly admitting she wants him to stay with her, except for ch 125′s “i’m scared. stay with me tonight,” after her mother’s sudden murder. she usually uses excuses instead, like cutely demanding fushi to walk with her after school and go on dates with her.

(chapter 36 vs. chapter 128.2)

as fushi was introduced to the people around tonari and mizuha, they received similar reactions, i.e. “your hair is so pretty!” and “woah, his hair is white!” in the pages following these, the similarities continue into tonari and mizuha gaining ownership over fushi: in ch 36 oopa declares “tonari found him. so he belongs to tonari,” while the islanders try to get on fushi’s good side, and in ch 128 fushi goes out of their way to ask which club mizuha belongs to when asked to join a club (vocalizing her claim on them so she doesn’t have to directly do so).

(chapters 38, 106, and 139)

when the opening comes for mizuha to actually admit her feelings in chapter 139, she tries, but demands instead, “so... love me.” this recalls kahak’s confession to kai in 105.3, that he wants to “protect fushi’s humanity.” kahak and mizuha were both covered in blood when they spoke, but the atmospheres and characters are different; mizuha is clever w her words, but still too immature to let go of her pride, whereas kahak was the exact opposite. he rid of himself of his pride for fushi when he was a child, but said a lot of the wrong things to fushi when it came down to it. additionally, mizuha, when she wants something, she’ll phrase her words so that it seems like there’s only one choice: to follow her. this has been the case for others including fushi (chapters 120.2′s testing of hanna with “if i died, would you cry for me?” and 132.1′s “i’ll teach you about love” and the following guilt-trip). tonari is more direct with her words and meaning than either mizuha or kahak, bc of her personality. she directly confronts fushi when she realizes he had felt betrayed by her in chapter 38, because she still needed him for his plans. but mizuha is more direct with her actions; in chapter 129.1, she latches herself onto fushi, while trying to get information out of him. after the failed marriage proposal, rather than physically attaching himself to fushi like mizuha, kahak used acts of domesticity and protection to subtly appeal to and maintain his space next to them.

(chapter 38 vs chapter 139)

tonari’s “there are people in this world who are better off dead” above isn’t far from the knockers’ reasoning behind “wishing for death is paramount to being dead” and the reason for mizuha’s mother’s death: left hand decided to “eliminate the cause of [mizuha’s breaking point’s] stress.” what this shows is that tonari can also justify murder, though granted, this is from a hundred chapters ago. however, this black and white thinking comes back in the modern era where tonari holds prejudice against mizuha because of her relation to hayase. tonari knows her dislike of mizuha is unfair, she can’t get around it. tonari is still as prideful as she was when she lived on jeannanda; it’s just that she is able to use fushi to justify her opinions now. i also want to bring up mizuha’s reaction to her mother’s death and funa’s knocker’s “purging and guidance.” mizuha seems comfortable with the sight of death, despite having a more normal childhood than tonari, because her actual main concern overwhelms it; she is always thinking on how she can appeal to fushi (almost like kahak), or in other words, how to salvage her pride. so instead of being concerned over being the actual murderer, she is concerned with appearing as a murderer to fushi.

so to actually answer ray’s question, objectively, tonari’s love is as excessive as kahak and mizuha’s. but personally, i think tonari’s love for fushi right now is also unhealthy, though it comes out of good will. kahak’s love also ended in fushi’s benefit, but it was undoubtedly unhealthy. and ofc, mizuha’s love is also unhealthy; she reaches for fushi for perfection, tonari reaches for fushi for humility.

[cvenir]

imma try this again bc i said y’know fck it (heh) bc i need to introduce these characters before making proper bios ok here we go

so actually since i did do zella, felix, and gwenna’s bios, i’ll actually just leave them out of the intro bc like.... i have 8 more lmao so like here you can find their bios in the first three circles n also imma link all the pinterests aGAIN bc they probably do more than i can

these are gonna be crude n real cut n dry but let’s face it who has time to read everything abt all 11 ok this is for US

CHRISTOPHER ‘KIT’ MILLER looks an awful lot like DONALD GLOVER. HE is THIRTY-TWO and while they’re MAGNETIC, they have a tendency to get pretty MERCENARY. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to DEGAS PARK by KEVIN ABSTRACT.

ok so kit is my son !! he is kinda a shitty person but it’s a result of his upbringing entirely like he was raised in a household of self-obsession and pre-occupation with the material things. aka he’s like filthy rich bc his parents are well-known in the entertainment business

his father is a rlly big time actor like he is thaT GUY ( my star wars lovin ass likes to pretend he’s billy dee williams bc lando unite but anyway unrelated ) and his mother is a super awesome film director so he grew up with that hanging over his shoulders. his dad was always really hard on him and pushed him to become an actor too but he isn’t abt that life (only to spite his dad lbr)

also his parents were lke actively trying not to have kids so his dad always kinda held that against kit and resented him from day one meanwhile his mother embraced it so :/

his mom is everything he ever dreamed of in a mother, and even tho she was always a bit too busy for him, she never let it affect their relationship and they’re still very close

so yeah kit is that fancy ass man like he bathes in the opulence. he doesn’t do much but gamble and parade his wealth around –– except he has invested in many businesses so like he can be p serious n focused on that sometimes bc like

$$$$

also he loves his ladies. like a lot. pls someone allow him to be the suGAR DADDY WE ALL DESERVE!!! but fr no that’s his biggest downfall like in his song inspo he can get very caught up in his emotions and rlly lose his head bc like he is calm cool and calculating and distant for the most part but once he gets attached it’s like he craves the connection and he can get very lost

anyway also bring me a plot where they may have grown up together and he’s very defensive over them like he doesn’t always get close to people but this person means the world to him and maybe he’s been lowkey in love his whole life but like whatever who talks abt feelings n ruins something so special he could never

yeah so idk what more to say at this point so yeah hmu w questions bc i could probably go off again

ROSALIND LEPAGE looks an awful lot like ADELAIDE KANE. SHE is TWENTY-FOUR and while they’re RESILIENT, they have a tendency to get pretty QUIXOTIC You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to MELTING by KALI UCHIS. 

okay now this is my baby. she is a sweet lil buttercup and only wants the best in life but it never comes to her ugh i’m wounded.

so she was born and raised in kola, v much small-town girl vibes. she absolutely loves it here but since growing up the town was really been stained by disappointment :/ when she was seventeen both of her parents like went missing just like completely disappeared leaving her and her six-year-old sister just completely alone which really fucked up her plans bc she was already accepted to a top-tier music school in new york for college for her passion for violin but she had to turn it down bc her sister was now her responsibility 

so she dropped out of highschool and got her ged and immediately entered the work force, leaving her dreams in the dust. she still plays every now and then, especially whenever there’s an open mic night at the coffee shop where she works like girl plugs in her amp n everything i love her

anyway like she doesn’t resent anyone or blame her sister bc she’s just so compassionate and selfless like she didn’t hesitate to change her life to support her sis but it does still kill her to know that her life just kinda never took off and probs never will. but now she just channels all that sadness into fighting to make sure her sister doesn’t end up stuck like she did

so yeah she’s just a huge sweetheart who loves doing things for others and she’s so so soft like someone hold my lil muffin :/ she can get way too caught up in dreams sometimes but y’know that’s life!!!

DIEGO CABRERA looks an awful lot like XAVIER SERRANO. HE is TWENTY-THREE and while they’re VIVACIOUS, they have a tendency to get pretty ERRATIC. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to DO IT AGAIN by NO ROME.

so one of the messiest children ever, he is here. ngl i got a lot of inspo from adam sackler from girls for my son diego so if u feel me, word. 

basically pls meet the world’s biggest narcissist –– he’s just like appalling sometimes but he really is trying his best. my boi grew up in kola and always planned on moving to LA to pursue his dream of being an actor and wow is he perfect for that bc my guy is the most dramatic and expressive hot mess you’ll ever find

his mind is always moving 100 miles a minute and he just says the craziest things ??? like he doesn’t know where to stop. diego is super passionate abt his own life and what he wants to do and what he believes; he won’t let you forget it either. he’s always here to share a piece of his mind whether you want it for not and he’s not afraid to turn people away bc his opinions are valid !!

like he’s sooo selfish and doesn’t even hide his own agenda, but ngl once you get him attached there’s no going back like he really gives everything his all and will devote anything it takes to procure happiness for those he loves

like he’s rrlly terrible but he truly has a good head on his shoulders and a good heart in his chest n it’ll beat for u rll hard if u earn it (thru his means ofc)

like when i say god complex i mean it

but c’mon pls give me the plot where like this person pined after him for such a fuckin long time and he legit only used them for sex n didn’t even hide it (like fr seconds after rolling over he said ‘so are you gonna leave now ? bye) bUT y’know they’ve been hooking up for so long to where he actually got invested and wanted them to come to his rehearsals and share his passion w them and they just like ..... stopped caring all of a sudden. so now he’s sad boi and mad boi bc after basically begging for him to give a fuck they up and ran when his heart got invOLVED LIKE FUCK ME fr this is the song and i need this connection pLS LOVE ME

anyway he’s a mess but i love him

PIPER KOVALSKY looks an awful lot like EMMY ROSSUM. SHE is TWENTY-SEVEN and while they’re NURTURING, they have a tendency to get pretty CALAMITOUS. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to COFFEE & CIGARETTES by VIC MENSA.

awhh pipes.... my poor bb. she is also quite the mess!! 

but lbr it’s all her fucking fault lmao like her life literally never took off but she has no one to blame but herself. like she just really has a talent for ruining things whenever they get good and she doesn’t even try too my bb just does not think abt ramifications ever

piper was also born and raised in kola but she’s hopped around from area to area bc she can’t keep a lease going to save her life

or a job

she’s a big fan of cigareetes and alcohol and partying but whenever she indullges in anything they kinda have a perfect way of getting her in trouble. like she really wants to stop living like a vagrant but her cyncicsm really gets her down so she barely tries

she has a few siblings that she really wants to protect bc they’re headed down her path as well but she can’t even keep her life straight ugh :/

but ok so she’s truly the biggest softie on the inside like she cares soooo fucking much and she does a terrible job at pretending she doesn’t. but ya girl still tries!

ok so time for me to go off abt a wanted connect!!!! so her song is coffee & cigarettes and it’s a bop find it here pLS and i just really feel in my bones that this should be a connection ok. give me that high school lovers that were never lovers bc all piper could focus on was her own self-destruction n rlly living it up so she just completely shut this person out when it finally became real :/ so yeah it’s a fucking mess and she’s never truly moved on

anyway i should probably move onto the next muse lmao

MALCOLM WEST looks an awful lot like REECE KING. HE is TWENTY-TWO and while they’re JOCULAR, they have a tendency to get pretty CAVALIER. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to EPITAPH by HIPPO CAMPUS. –––––– may or may not be inspired by jake peralta

when i say he’s a goofster i mean he is a goofster and a gaffster ok

my tiny son who just wants to be a big bad detective and fight crime and just crack jokes along the way he is the meme king and he’ll let you know it

he grew up in atlanta where both of his parents were cops so he really just always dreamed of being just like them one day 

until his dad told him he’d never make it. that crushed his spirit entirely and ever since then he really kinda just figured out who his dad was ?? he caught him cheating on his mom and also just being a dirty cop and it just broke his heart bc that was his hero. and y’know malcolm gooddoer and fighter for justice so he went to his mom with this discovery and she just kind of admitted that she knew abt all of it but couldn’t do anything abt it so... he just kinda left and moved to kola to start over

he entered the police academy there as soon as he possibly could (18 i think maybe 19 if i’m dumb ) and just did not stop working his ass off and doing all kinds of paperwork and bust until he finally reached detective just a week ago

don’t get me wrong ya boi hates paperwork but he’s gotta do what he’s gotta do !!

anyway he’s a clown but he loves life and and even tho he’s a child he can take some things seriously

aside from his true feeling heh who ?? i don’t know her n imma just tell a joke or do an impression or smth instead

alsO idk if anyone knows chew the comic series but he dEF IS GONNA HAVE THOSE POWERS FOR THE SUPERHERO/SUPERNATURAL THREAD stay tuned

CAMBRIA SONG looks an awful lot like JENNIE KIM. SHE is TWENTY-ONE and while they’re IDEALISTIC, they have a tendency to get pretty WHIMSICAL. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to MARCELINE by WILLOW.

ok first of all her pinterest is a whole ass aesthetic and u basically see everything she’s abt on there 10/10 would reccommend

now this is a smol bean that is also a bad bitch and we stan !! she’s your astrology loving, extra ass, witty lil witch and she loves adding in her two cents! she’s a sweet lil thing but her bite is bigger than her bark so watch out fr

mostly imma have her in the supernatural verse (witch heh heh), demi-god verse (u kno she’s hecate’s daughter), n maybe the horror verse bc i want my bb to be a medium like lorraine warren that’s my girl!! 

other than that catch her throwing out ur natal chart, charging n cleansing her cyrstals, n offering free tarot readings! really she has her mf shit together n loves helping ppl w spiritual awakenings ok

here is a pic of her two sides conversing ok big meme here

anyway i’m a big fan of her pinterest and i hope that gives everyone a good vibe for her bc tbh i’m tired lol

so imma do my other three muses in another post tomorrow bc !!! ya girl is feeling lazy now lmao sry this took so long geez

[realmzenith]

elaina ! :)

lays down, mai ily. anyways?? someone pls save elaina she Needs help

What’s the maximum amount of time your character can sit still with nothing to do?fairly long?? but not super long it’d make her anxious. maybe twenty minutes. it’d be a different story if it was a life or death thing tho obv

How easy is it for your character to laugh?difficult. from one to ten w one being v easily she’s like a 7. but for full uninhibited laughter it’s a solid 9. she mostly smiles and when she does laugh it’s at the dumbest things

How do they put themselves to bed at night (reading, singing, thinking?)she’ll lurk on instagram or think which are honestly both bad ideas for her bc instagram makes her depressed bc her social life sux and thinking makes her depressed bc she’s pessimistic and tends to overthink EVERYTHINg. however sometimes she’ll be smart abt it and read a book or look at plant pics or space which will more often than not successfully allow her to relax and get some shut eye

How easy is it to earn their trust?HM not too difficult prbly a 3 if ur nice to her and ur not a complete idiot- ok well. just if ur nice to her bc she literally falls in love w josie an idiot in her storyline

How easy is it to earn their mistrust?moderately difficult she has a hard time accepting that the ppl she trusts are capable of wronging her and usually assumes it was smth she did. she’s kind of an idiot like that so yk :) she’s prbly a 6 on that one? if we’re also accounting for the ppl she moderately trusts. however if we’re only talking abt the ppl she genuinely completely trusts it’s like an 8. she’s not COMPLETELy stupid but still p stupid abt relationships

Do they consider laws flexible, or immovable?rules should be followed. she accepts them as a given and that they will be followed as a given. it’ll srsly throw off her game if someone starts blatantly disobeying the law in front of her even if it is just a nominal thing

What triggers nostalgia for them, most often? Do they enjoy that feeling?she’s not a v emotional person? she does feel deeply but hmm i suppose she is fairly nostalgic. certain melodies played on the guitar would prbly be one of the bigger triggers. her mom used to play and she and her dad would sing like dorks but they?? kind of dont do it anymore and she misses it but she isn’t sure how to ask to do it again. it’s the same w disney movies. they don’t watch them as a fam as much as they used to anymore but they still do on occasion! as for enjoying it she doesn’t rlly like nostalgia?? but she lets herself fall into it frequently

What were they told to stop/start doing most often as a child?she was constantly told to talk to the other kids. she’s never been v social or good w ppl as she prefers her small group of ppl she knows and is comfortable w plus she’s an only child so she’s always been forced to socialize esp in casual settings

Do they swear? Do they remember their first swear word?not super frequently. she does say damn bc that’s just the classic xstj swear word, her first she remembers v distinctly. it was “bitch” and completely her older cousin’s fault

What lie do they most frequently remember telling? Does it haunt them?she lowkey feels like her entire life is a lie? she’s a smart gal and gets good grades easily. she’s close to the top of her class and is considered one of the smart kids. but she herself is convinced she’s painfully mediocre and despite her other talents and unique personality traits she’s like :) im sorry for lying to u all i actually have zero interesting qualities and am a drag but ofc she never voices that bc lbr insecurity? ugly and she doesn’t want to lose the few friends she does have bc she dumped her fears on everyone else. she is, as i said, a Mess

How do they cope with confusion (seek clarification, pretend they understand, etc)?she almost always pretends she understands but if she doesn’t feel like there’ll be negative consequences to asking for clarification and she’s feeling confident she’ll bluntly ask the other person to clear things up for her esp in a business type setting such as school projects, etc. it’s situational but socially speaking? she’ll pretend until she Dies

How do they deal with an itch found in a place they can’t quite reach?ask nico to get it or just struggle for ages to try to get it herself

What color do they think they look best in? Do they actually look best in that color?she likes green and black but thinks she looks p drab in most things. in all actuality she prbly does look sharpest in black but yellow makes her look super cute, brings out a softer side of her. dark green is also flattering on her

What animal do they fear most?hm prbly eels esp electric eels. they freak her out for no particular reason. otherwise, she likes most animals and doesn’t mind most bugs

How do they speak? Is what they say usually thought of on the spot, or do they rehearse it in their mind first?she does usually think before she speaks. on the extreme she’ll turn over a phrase abt ten times in her mind before even considering speaking it aloud but that’s rare and only in high stress situations. despite the fact that she does think before she speaks she’s very blunt abt most things. lay it out like it is and all. embellishing sentences or softening her statements is smth she rarely does as she finds it inefficient 

What makes their stomach turn?reckless behavior she HATES when ppl do stupid risky crap in front of her she finds it very unnecessary and anxiety inducing

Are they easily embarrassed?oh yes absolutely

What embarrasses them?everything. anything. her existence. ppl flirting w her. her parents. being teased. being incompetent. being singled out for anything. lots of things :)

What is their favorite number?she likes the number 60. no reason in particular it’s just a nice number. cue her friend, nico in the back yelling SIXTY???? MORE LIKE SEXY

If they were asked to explain the difference between romantic and platonic or familial love, how would they do so?oh oof dont talk to her about love it throws her for an existential crisis. hm but if srsly asked this she’d prbly say smth like “familial love is smth we’re rarely allowed to choose. platonic is more logical and circumstantial, and romantic is a combination of the two in the sense that it’s ur heart’s choice to begin and ur mind’s to continue.”

Why do they get up in the morning? society dictates that in order for an individual to contribute meaningfully to the world, you must get up by 7 am and do whatever lot’s been handed to you. thus she, as a good functioning member of society, gets up in the mornings and drives to school day in and day out as fate has dictated her duty to be

How does jealousy manifest itself in them (they become possessive, they become aloof, etc)? erratic. she’ll act strangely and become more distant. if it continues for long enough she’ll eventually snap at whoever’s nearest and asking what’s up w her

How does envy manifest itself in them (they take what they want, they become resentful, etc)? it makes her sad tbh sldkfjlkj she’s like welp.. this is the lot i’ve been given if i don’t accept it that’s my problem. then she keeps her head up and carries on

Is sex something that they’re comfortable speaking about? To whom? she prefers not to talk abt sex. she’d be v confused if someone brought up the topic of sex casually tho she isn’t SUPER squeamish abt discussing it it’s just?? unprofessional so why would u? ofc w her s/o she would be more than willing to discuss it in order to smooth out questions or misunderstandings before yk. actually. doing the sex

What are their thoughts on marriage? marriage to her is one of the pillars of society, and while she respects people who don’t want to get married, for herself she views it a checkbox on her list of things she needs to do before she dies. it’s?? like she sort of has a timeline and marriage is on the list of things that need to happen sometime in her twenties. she believes marriage should be a mutually beneficial union based on love and respect and believes that along w family units it’s a wonderful invention. however, despite all of this she kind of doubts she’ll ever get married bc she’s like who would date me lbr here :) and while simultaneously seeking after marriage she’s resigned herself to becoming an eventual crazy old cat lady

What is their preferred mode of transportation? she prefers bullet trains. efficient, usually comfortable, she doesn’t have to drive- what more could you want? she’s also fond of walking if a place is close by. helps her chill

What causes them to feel dread? the feeling that a relationship is falling apart and the divide between herself and the other person is growing. the little things like not waiting for the other person after class or “forgetting” to mention another thing about their day- the small things that point to a relationship breaking down. if there’s one thing she hates more than unnecessary conflict and having to just end things then and there it’s watching things slowly fall apart. that is extremely dread inducing in her opinion

Would they prefer a lie over an unpleasant truth? if u asked her? she’d say she prefers the truth. in reality? she prefers the lie. she internalizes things and oftentimes “unpleasant truths” can weigh her down for ages. frequently enough to note, she’ll allow herself to continue in ignorance rather than accept the reality of the truth which she’ll sort of know she’s doing but just push to the back of her mind in order to avoid the panic that comes with actually confronting the problem. ignorance is bliss and all. nevertheless, in the long run and in hindsight, she prefers the truth as ripping off the bandaid proves easier than pulling out misplaced stitches one by one

Do they usually live up to their own ideals? she doesn’t come close. she has very lofty ideals to which she holds both herself and others around her. she wants to be someone who’s looked up to as strong. she values efficiency, honesty, reliability and genuinely good motives as well as charisma, passion and confidence. she’s doing alright with the first few but the last three are debatable. she’s passionate about v select things and her confidence levels looks like a heartrate monitor

Who do they most regret meeting? herself. she regrets gaining sentience

Who are they the most glad to have met? josie ;) but nico and ale are close seconds

Do they have a go-to story in conversation? Or a joke? nope what’s a Conversation? what’s a Joke? she doesnt know them :)

Could they be considered lazy? that’s a no. she works extremely hard and nearly always carries through. it’s partially her nature and partially a way for her to “make up” for her perceived lack of talents

How hard is it for them to shake a sense of guilt? extremely difficult but w time she eventually can esp when given the right type of support

How do they treat the things their friends come to them excited about? Are they supportive? that’s. a hard one. she IS technically supportive but that’s only when she recognizes how much the thing means to the other person and she’s honestly rlly bad at reading these kinds of situations, so it’s rare that she actually does. she’ll kinda be like wtf but if she doesn’t recognize the other person is genuinely excited and invested in the thing she’ll do her best to give her own brand of awkward support 

Do they actively seek romance, or do they wait for it to fall into their lap?she’ll pursue a romantic interest if enough proof that it’s plausible is given but it’s rare that she gets enough “proof” for this to happen. generally speaking, she kind of pushes her desire for romance down. she’ll worry abt it later or at least until josie shows up eyes emoji

Do they have a system for remembering names, long lists of numbers, things that need to go in a certain order (like anagrams, putting things to melodies, etc)? not rlly? she’ll just go thru things multiple times she’s not the most innovative person when it comes to things like this. route memorization is her go to 

What memory do they revisit the most often?;) depends on where in the storyline we’re talking but post story defo the time when she and josie went hiking w some of their other friends and when they reached the summit of the mountain the clouds were beneath the peak n completely coating the sky. it looked like a carpet of clouds, like another world and they shared a bit of a Moment. the little things are what elaina rlly cherishes

How easy is it for them to ignore flaws in other people?difficult she’s a bit of a critical person. she’s also not the most tactful when it comes to emotional intelligence related situations so ppl will likely find out she does see those flaws in them if they stick around long enough

How sensitive are they to their own flaws?not SO much but she does take things to heart. she’s sort of?? accepted her perceived mediocrity and general dullness but she’s in no way ceasing to attempt to change other things abt herself. so she’ll seemingly take criticisms in stride but they’ll stick w her when she’s Overthinking

How do they feel about children? kids are? good? she likes kids. as for having them, she’s considered it some and she thinks she might like to. at the same time, she also thinks she’d make a terrible parent- too harsh, bad w comfort, easily stressed. in all reality, she’d be better than most ppl as one esp after gaining a bit of confidence

How badly do they want to reach their end goal? rn the goal is graduating and she wants that fairly badly but she doesn’t particularly doubt her ability to achieve it. after that, it’s getting a good job which she also doesn’t overtly doubt as a certainty so yes she does want it but it’s not?? SUPEr concerning except when she begins to doubt her abilities and if she’ll ever feel like her life is fulfilling 

If someone asked them to explain their sexuality, how would they do so? she’s lesbian. she’d say it means she’s attracted to women 

QUESTIONS FOR CREATORS

A) Why are you excited about this character?baby. she’s gonna find loveB) What inspired you to create them?love, simon! i wanted to write a cute lesbian high school romance so thus josie and elaina were bornC) Did you have trouble figuring out where they fit in their own story?nope!D) Have they always had the same physical appearance, or have you had to edit how they look?nope again! she used to be full korean but now she’s half korean and half scandinavian! i think she used to be taller too she’s 5′5″ nowE) Are they someone you would get along with? Would they get along with you?there are some aspects of each other that would get on the other’s nerves. like i dont think she’d appreciate the wonky outbursts i sometimes have and i’d get annoyed by her lack of social tact/annoyance at the world even tho i lowkey share those traits but otherwise i think we’d get along p well! i think i’d find her cute and i think she’d like my perceived confidence. we share a similar rationality as wellF) What do you feel when you think of your OC (pride, excitement, frustration, etc)?empathy she’s a big mood tbh and also i want her to be happy G) What trait of theirs bothers you the most?her lack of emotional intelligence. while i like blunt and logic oriented ppl it’d get slightly frustrating after a while to be around someone who’s a lil oblivious to social/emotional cues even if that’s a moodH) What trait do you admire most?her humble diligence. i have to complain twice as much as her to get half the things she gets done doneI) Do you prefer to keep them in their canon universe?i think she’d ALSO do great in a sci fi universe. ha maybe i need to give these kids a sci fi au verseJ) Did you have to manipulate or exclude canon factors to allow them to create their character?not rlly no!

[izzyliker]

Help I’m rlly confused and don’t know what to do hamilton is my special interest and I love lin but I saw your post about him not supporting autistic people and I don’t wanna support that but idk how to stop liking hamilton.

im gonna answer in sections bc i have a lot of thoughts abt this so hold on

1. im not sure which post ur talking abt? i know lin has supported AS before b/c chris jackson with whom he is close friends with has an autistic kid and felt like he was supported by AS, and he hasnt talked about the thing since, at all. 

2. i dont think its impossible ive said before something really polarizing like ‘lin hates autistic people’ bc im dramatic but to be honest i dont think he hates us as much as hes clueless abt the harm AS does to us and believes his friend over autistic strangers. which, we can talk about how shitty & ableist that is and how it matches a pattern of refusal to respond to criticism in the past, but i dont think he... hates us?

3. so because lin doesnt tend to publicly acknowledge that hes done things wrong or been misinformed (which i honestly kinda get, like, if youve seen the tweets ppl send him abt this stuff, some of them - theyre ugly as hell) we dont actually know if hes changed his opinion on all of this. i dont think hes publicly supported AS since what, 2015? (that date is unverified im just estimating) 

4. hamilton is my SI too! i even saw it. like, i paid money to see it. and i get not wanting to support ppl that support AS and ofc its your choice whether you feel comfortable with the musical anymore, but personally heres what i think: you liking hamilton isnt.... supporting lin being an AS supporter. 

5. this isnt like. supposed to be a universal thing i dont think. like, if you cant do this its fine, youre allowed to have deal breakers, but i find it.... really freeing to approach idols/celebrities/content creators with a sort of nuance and also understanding? i dont have to like lin’s support of AS to like hamilton, because theyre not connected, and i dont have to like lin erasing a Real Historical Gay Relationship to still like his personality or his activism work re: PR or other causes. like, idk? you can apply nuance to how you feel abt people, basically.  

6. tldr i dont think you NEED to stop liking hamilton and i dont think you liking hamilton supports lin Not supporting autistic ppl the way allistics should support us

[redandfranticfeelings]

'tag things making fun of doug' because your personal enjoyment of an abuser's content should supersede the feelings of the people he abused by making them act out rape jokes? the fact that making fun of an abuser upsets you because you like him warrants some serious self-examination on your part. 'you can't make fun of an abuser around me bc i like his content and you can't criticize me bc mental illness' is some wendycorduroy shit. i'm surprised you'd do this given how critical you are of her.

and yes, people are allowed to not like you for still liking the show. ofc people can have problematic interests if they want, but content that has been directly used by its creators to abuse people is a special kind of bad. you’re allowed to like it, but guilt tripping people or implying they’re not allowed to dislike the fact that you still support it is incredibly callous to the people rob, doug, and mike abused. this is not, nor should it be, about your feelings. this is about the victims.             

you know what. upon further consideration, those asks were not kindly phrased. my intention was to emphasize that because the anniversary movies were vessels for abuse (injuries, rape jokes, etc) it was inappropriate to prioritize one’s own feelings over the feelings of the victims or block out criticism, but i phrased them in a way that was not productive and was attacking you. i’m sorry for my wording and for being a dick          

thank you for your follow up apology. i see where youre coming with this but i think there’s a few things that i can point towards me not giving up on the show altogether.

short answer: while i detest the way the company has been run and is executing public relations, and i am uncomfortable watching any video on their channel and have not done such for weeks, and i really want the harmed ex-producers to receive justice, i still believe there is a shred of hope for the show based on what recent producers have said, and that doug can reform himself by owning up to his deliberate ignorance, neglect, and egotism, though he is not the biggest abuser in this situation. i have a lot of emotional history with NC that means i need time before i’m able to drop the show altogether, if i ever can, and i just want to avoid anything that isn’t constructive and just intended to make anybody feel bad for liking the show/movies before this information was widely known.

long answer:

most of the criticism lauded against doug isnt so much being the direct abuser but being complacent and ignorant of people’s health. if i recall correctly, while it was a pretty unnecessary and terrible joke to make in my opinion, he didn’t pick up that the drill scene in TBF made anybody uncomfortable at the time? and in recent years he seems more concerned about what his cast undergoes, and a lot of them have said that he does ask about jokes that might hurt them and make sure they’re comfortable. i believe he apologized for it and acknowledged his naievity in the movie’s commentary but restating that apology would be beneficial now, yeah.

while complacency and ignorance is bad, i think he has been neglectful, not directly abusive. also, idk if you meant this, but your phrasing makes it kinda sound like his projects were intended as a means to abuse people; the abuse happened because of the movies, yeah, but it was because of doug being egotistical and ignorant, not malicious. the content of the movies reflect’s doug’s massive ego but it doesn’t reflect a desire to abuse anybody. if he did the shit that mike michaud or mike ellis did, that would be inexcusable for me and i would have lost hope for him.

if anybody is definitely abusive, it’s the CEO, who i love watching get bashed because he is indeed a sexist verbally abusive asshole who holds the power in the company and is using it for his stupid selfish needs. it’s also been stated that doug is restricted by his contract with the CEO and could just straight up not be able to make videos if he stepped out of turn, so while i wish he would use his walkout power more, he doesn’t have as much power as some people attribute to him. he’s complicit in abuse but i don’t think that’s the same as being abusive? the producers themselves seem to go back and forth about how they feel about him but a recurring theme is that he’s tragically ignorant of abuse, but not on the same level of abusive as michaud, if they call him abusive at all (most just seem to feel betrayed by him).

additionally, almost all creators who have worked with him in the past couple of years, have stated they had generally positive experiences with the network, even the ones who are now leaving. the only thing that seems to remain an issue is the awful, awful PR (that apology sucked, i criticized it myself) and the lack of communication towards anybody not chicago-based. i feel they need to ditch michaud (which probably won’t be easy, since he’s a shady capitalist fuck), formally apologize and maybe provide compensation for past producers who were abused by the higher-ups, and either improve relations or just restrict everything to NC, because at this point that’s the only show that’s going to be left if they don’t get their shit together anyway. but i do think that if they just take the easy solution of apologizing, even though it’s already way too late and they royally fucked themselves over, things can be a little better.

i’m also not against criticizing doug for not speaking out, because the least he could do is apologize at least privately and i’ve even emailed him imploring him to do at least that (i don’t expect a response though lmao). i just get hurt at people attacking the show and movies as being terrible and something no fan should like. a lot of people really attached to the series before this blew up, and for the most part the content of the show doesn’t reflect the behind-the-scenes issues.

i’m spreading relevant information on twitter regarding abuse and producers’ feelings, but so many people (obviously not the producers, but the fans/haters) involved in this are more concerned with just shitting on doug bc they don’t like him and a lot are trying to make him out as worse than he is. i want to spread what the producers say because i trust them, but i’m wary of fans who seem to just be in it for the drama or bc they never liked NC and they wanna spite people who did (yes, those people exist, they mocked me on kiwifarms).

i know this isn’t about me, but i’ve invested a lot of money and time and emotional energy in the show, it’s introduced me to new friends, and it’s been directly and indirectly responsible for some of my highest and lowest points of the past year and a half. my comfort ship has been very helpful in helping my loneliness. it gave me something to look forward to every day. not to pull the autism card, but it’s difficult for me to drop a special interest very easily and i’m jealous of people who can. i need time to grow entirely out of it if i can.

but even still, i haven’t watched a NC episode in weeks, even the new ones, due to my discomfort and shame towards the show and network (only NC thing i watched lately was the hyper q&a, which is on tamara’s channel, and i used it to fall asleep). i unsubscribed, and i really i only care about a few aspects of the show anyway.

if you want to hate me because i can’t immediately remove NC from my heart then fine, but if so, just unfollow me. i don’t want people to not post NC criticism, and i fully endorse spreading relevant information because i care about the victims and i want them to receive justice. i just want hate tagged so i, personally, do not have to be constantly reminded that a show that is/was close to my heart has so many awful things behind it, even if i’m not sure if i still love it anymore. and while i have been a bit guilt-trippy in the past i’ve been confronted on that already and i’m trying not to come across that way, and i’m sorry for having been manipulative at all. i’m paranoid about being abandoned and hated just for having watched this show but unless you’re like, a super close friend of mine, you can unfollow any time you want.

[kxlance]

here are my thoughts on the bullshit under the cut cuz it's gonna get long probs i assure you it’s a reassuring post:

ok so the interview itself wasn't bad to me honestly. jeremy did not deny the bi!lance hint, which was the most important thing to know. the fact that he said "that much i can say" implies that there's something left to know that he can't say because nda.

i'm gonna list a positive thing and a negative thing here: the negative one is that on one hand, it pisses me off that lgbt characters are treated as such a big spoilery deal when it should just....feel so natural to have them in a show. also thinking back that dreamworks tagged certain videos as klance just for views...well it's kind of a coward move if they don't at least end the show with lgbt rep. on the other, i really don't see the point with going all "no comment" about it if it weren't to happen?? that would be very assholey, and i know that the writers are not to be trusted, but the mere fact that they lie so much over things than then ended up being canon (e.g: galra keith, paladin allura, pidge being a girl etc) can't help but make me think they are pretty much hiding the endgame couple on purpose. you could argue they could be hinting at allurance which i'm not excluding bc some of the things could be honestly interpreted that way and also they never mention them ever as a couple except i remember like kimberly saying that allura isn't interested in lance (but she could be lying obviously) and jeremy here stating that lance has still a crush on her which is pretty evident and there's nothing new. (we also learned, according to him, that lance basically can dish it out but he can't take it which frankly...i can see pretty well as canon)

on that spectrum, pls note that this happening (or lance ending up with a girl for the matter) doesn't absolutely excludes bi!lance like at all. he can still be confirmed as bi and end up with a girl and that itself would still be very important! one thing doesn't exclude the other honestly so i say very confidently that lance being bi will be confirmed. like 100% convinced that it will. (do not forget lauren's drawing where lance is holding the lgbt sign, there's a specific reason he's the one holding that)

also does anybody think that....this stress over lance liking ladies and stuff is kinda....suspicious?? like jeremy himself was used to say "lol he flirts with anybody on two legs ahha" and now today all of a sudden he's putting a lot of stress on the ""woman"" part. which kind of threw me off? i might be reaching obviously, but mmm you know? and all of this comes after joaquim said "what he's looking for is getting to a place that might be different than when he started in the series" and “what he wants might not be what he needs” and if math isn't an opinion, he started the series always wanting allura so if what he wants is now changing..........................

it is also true that lauren used female pronouns in that interview and while that could be an indicator that lance will end up with a girl, it's also not set in stone bc.... they used to hide pidge's pronouns the same way and if lauren had said "him" you know that keith would have suddenly come to mind bc??? he's legit the only person lance has been paired up so much with. they've been sort of a duo ever since the beginning. and they've had most of the couple tropes out of all the possible pairings??? in the show??? allow me to list some. I'm too lazy to back this up with pics but like you know the scenes i'm talking about (and i also say this because when i ship something i ALWAYS look at canon interactions. and they have a lot):

the bonding moment (or the we are a good team scene if you will), which is not only visually very romantic (the purple lightning aka their two primary colors mixed together) but its sort of the turning point of their relationship and it's something that's very much used with couples especially with couples with their dynamic because oh lord!!!!!! do you know how many heterosexual couples exist with a dynamic like theirs? broody boy meets friendly girl and they're total opposites but ops they fall in love?? bitch literally every goddamn YA novel is like this. anyways, you know that scene would be considered romantic if it was between a boy and a girl, and indeed, allurance sort of paralleled that scene in s4 so if you consider that as romantic but not this one....well....buddy,,,,,,,they're basically in the same lions keith and lance were aka the fire and ice dynamic and if you can see that as romantic with a/l you should be able to see it the same way with....k/l but i digress).

as i was saying, the bonding moment is the turning point of keith and lance's relationship. after that we get:

1) an episode where keith is super anxious to have lance out of a pod and gets jealous when he sees lance flirting with allura, reminds him of their "bonding moment" and gets offended that lance doesnt remember (and an entire discussion could be open as to why he was so offended and the vlog kinda sets that up), overall the flirty banter that we're used to (not to mention this is the famous infamous bi flag planet)

2) a solo mission where they're shown to be working extremely well with each other (like classic battle couple duo scenes)

onto other tropes:

the subtle jealousy that can be interpreted both ways

THE ELEVATOR SCENE which is such a common trope for main couples!! they usually get stuck and have a moment of clarification or something like that. keith and lance's was a lot more comedic but it did lead them to collaborate in battle 2 seconds after so.... it did have an impact like those scenes usually do. (also that scene wasn’t necessary for the plot at all and yet...)

Lance making that fond face while talking about Keith that, may I remember you, was animated purposely to be that way. and overall there's a lot of subtle things like lance being constantly worried over keith in season 2 even though they didn't have much dynamic development??

the hey man scene? the fact that everybody was looking at lance EXPECTING HIM TO DO SOMETHING. and he could have easily looked back at them like "why me???" BUT NOPE, he was ready to go to comfort him!!!!!!!!

i get so worked up over the fact that so many of their scenes can be paralleled with other scenes as the story goes bc LETS BE FUCKING REAL FOR A GODDAM SECOND: they're the only pairing who started a way and are ending up in another. because they've had the most coherent development as a pairing in the seasons and we're fucking halfway through the show and when you also remember that it's pretty clear that lance wants to falls in love and that it's a ""slow burn""" kind of deal,,,,how in the fuck,,,,can it be other than klance??? literally nO OTHER PAIRING had a development since the goddamn start i’m not even saying this with my biased ass i’m saying this objectively speaking!!!!

all of season 3 could be a huge romantic trope honestly but like 2 scenes in particular strike as very romantic:

the leave the math to pidge scene obviously (the way it is framed is very tropey lmfao) and the way we see keith through lance's eyes.......pretty gay if you ask me

and the i got you buddy scene which someone made notice that AN EXACT SAME SCENE happens in the wonder woman movie but with a boy/girl pairing ofc. BUT IT'S THE SAME FUCKING SCENE THAT'S LIKE ROMANTIC TROPE 101 I AINT PLAYING

add on the fact that keith might have left team voltron to make sure lance had a place and boom. pretty romantic to me.

even if jeremy sees them as brothers....which is like...super fucking odd to me bc....he never mentioned this before almost like he's backtracking lololol, his opinion isn't...you know...canon. (and like lbr they never acted like brothers in the show??? and the creators never addressed them as such unlike...you know what) i like jeremy jokes and meme as much as the next guy but i'm a realist and i know that he doesn't really ship klance or anything he just knows how to spoiler the good stuff lolz but also he didn't say anything wrong like it's just how he sees it but the creators never said so (lauren montgomery called lance keith's stability don't forget that) and overall there are wayyyy too many hints to not believe that's its gonna be canon. like......it even makes sense with the overall story better than any other pairing?? because it's pretty plausible that lance had a crush on keith at the garrison that tried to mask with the rivalry. the way he acts and the way he tries to always get his attention furtherly proves that. it's a common thing to do when you have a crush lmao.

LIKE THOSE TWO ARE ALWAYS PAIRED UP EVEN IN THE FUCKING SEASON 2 POSTER?? LIKE THEY COULD HAVE GONE WITH KEITH IN THE MARMORA OUTFIT SINCE IT WAS A BIG PART OF THE SEASON BUT NO??? THEY PUT HIM IN THE SWIM TRUNKS WITH LANCE FOR THOSE 2 MINUTES OF SCENE THEY HAD TOGETHER?????

ok that's it keep on hoping and remember that klance not happening doesn't mean that also bi lance won't because those two things aren’t mutually exclusive ok? but also don't lose hope on klance itself especially if it's something that makes you happy because fandom is meant to be a distraction and klance is an healthy lgbt ship that deserves all the attention it gets and it’s groundbreaking from so many aspects and it being canon would be amazing. bye

ALSO PLEASE STOP COMMENTING SHIT ON JEREMY’S PERSONAL PICS ON INSTAGRAM HE DIDN’T DO ANYTHING WRONG THIS IS EMBARASSING

bonus

[jeoseungsajas]

say what you want about the ending, dokkaebi was such a work of art??? its quality was consistent throughout its entirety, the acting was fantastic, and ofc cinematography was solid 100% of the way through.

i have a lot of thoughts on the ending so i’m prob just gnna stick them under a read more but tl;dr: this drama was excellent and regardless of what you ship, kim eun sook, lee eun bok, and the rest of the production team and the actors did an incredible job and also i am highkey crying

since i already mentioned shipping ig the first thing i really want to address has to do with that bc already i’m sort of seeing it and this is smthn that bothers the hell out of me in terms of dramas like this: ship what you want, but don’t call “bad writing” or w/e on the team just bc they didnt canonize your personal otp.

it’s just childish and bitter and while everyone is entitled to their own opinion and should be allowed to ship what they want, saying that something flopped just bc it didn’t live up to your own personal expectations is unfair and really disrespectful to the writers, especially when you can see that they put a fair amount of work into plotting out the development of the main relationships within the drama. there are cases where endgame ships really suck and don’t make any sense, but in this case, the dynamics between shin/eun tak and sunny/yeo were very good, well-developed, and not shoehorned at all -- read: while certain characters may have also had a plausible foundation for a canon ship, the ships that did become canon also had good chemistry and solid development which led to their eventual canonization.

and disclaimer in case the point that i was trying to make got lost somewhere: no, i don’t hate yeo/shin and i think it’s okay for people to still ship them, but i don’t appreciate bitter shippers whose only reason for calling the whole ending bad is that their otp didnt become canon. if you dislike it for other reasons, that’s totally fine, but if your only issue with how things played out was tht yeo/shin didnt endgame, i honestly don’t know what to tell you except that that’s really unfair and immature u__u ;; ‘’

now onto my actual thoughts on the drama itself hfhfh ,,!!

for one thing, going into it i didn’t expect to fall so in love with the plot and the characters themselves. the first thing that really impressed me about the drama were its visuals -- you can tell just from episode one that it had a really high budget and some good cinematographers behind it. the shots were extremely cinematic and not something that i’d expect from a serial drama.

obviously i couldn’t ignore shin and eun tak’s age gap and that was actually something that had me kind of iffy at the start but i stuck with it because the writers did an excellent job of ensuring that their dynamic didn’t encroach creepy territory. the fact that the age gap was addressed within the show, the way eun tak and shin treated each other -- you can tell that a lot of thought was put into the way their relationship would develop, and acknowledging the fact that there was an age gap also made it so that it wasn’t just some uncomfortable fact looming in the back of people’s minds. 

and even when the two of them would do typical couple things (ie: holding hands, kissing, etc) pre-time skip, it was always portrayed very innocently. kdramas tend to have very Spicy kiss scenes, but the kisses between shin and eun tak were never overdone which was something i could really appreciate. they were very soft and innocent... heartwarming and appropriate given the kind of relationship they had and how their feelings towards each other developed.

like despite the fact that shin has lived for so long, he notes that eun tak is his first love; even though eun tak is portrayed as more youthful, even she has more experience in regards to love than shin given that she herself has a first love that isn’t him. what this does for their dynamic is that it allows for them to display their affections in that lighter fashion, it gives their love a youthful and wholesome vibe to it -- it doesn’t really feel “adult” if that?? makes sense?? obviously theres a shift when shin returns in episode 14 but of course that’s only the result of both of them maturing.

now, in regards to sunny and yeo i have to say that their endgame was slightly more satisfying than shin/eun tak’s (lbr everyone lowkey knew they were going to end up together happily ever after--) because of just the pure amount of pain both of them went through not only throughout the “present” but also their tragic past lives as well.

shin and eun tak were very wholesome and sweet to watch and, being the main couple, they had the perk of being able to enjoy being a couple in a proper sense (ie: the skinship, the dates, their wedding, etc) -- this is something that yeo and sunny didn’t get to experience very much.

in their past lives, we’re given a glimpse of their relationship but we don’t see a lot of it. there was that sweet scene where the two of them run into each other, but following it, it seems like their relationship went rather cold. the fact that sun love yeo so much that she literally died so that park joong won couldn’t use her to hurt him only feels more tragic given that yeo never recognized that she loved him during his lifetime as the king. he dies thinking that nobody loves him, and so, despite what he did (which i have a hard time.. attributing just to him since he was being manipulated), i really wanted for him to have a happy ending with her as well.

when it looked like the two of them were going to be apart forever i honestly was a little apprehensive because they honestly deserve to exist together in peace; their meeting in the present time with yeo as a reaper almost didnt’ seem to count. they “held hands” once, kissed once, and never really even got to “date” properly given how awkward yeo was due to his occupation. as endearing as those scenes were, they never got to enjoy each other’s company because there was always the risk of sunny figuring out his identity and their fate was basically marked for tragedy anyway given that yeo was a jeoseung saja and sunny was human.

given the ups and downs with these two, i was extremely satisfied with how their fates played out which brings me to my next point where opinion really takes place --

despite how “boring” these types of happily ever after endings can be, i feel like this was far more satisfying that had the ended things on a more ambiguous or sadder note. i think it’s sweet how nobody really gets left out of the cycle of reincarnation (assuming yeo was also on his fourth life during the final ep + i like to believe that shin will be able to rest once eun tak completes her 4th life-) and that our protagonists are allowed the time to enjoy their relationships and their lives together. during the show there were just. too many factors that make that sort of thing impossible (shin’s inability to die, yeo being a reaper, eun tak’s status as a missing soul, that binch park joong won, just to name a few--)  and while it’s easy enough to say, “well what was the point everyone should’ve just died and gotten reincarnated to begin with” the drama really makes a point of how important life is, whether it was someone’s first or fourth. even if the characters didn’t get to enjoy their time together as soon as they recognized the deep caring they had towards each other, in the end, those feelings still manifested and they’re allowed the right to be with each other and exist without the negative aspects of their previous lives weighing them down.

dokkaebi was just incredible and its consistency is what makes it so good?? dramas like this tend to go downhill in terms of quality once they’ve reached that climactic episode but dokkaebi finished as strong as it started imo the way relationships were developed, the parallelism and foreshadowing, the endearing comic relief moments, and the beautiful soundtrack all worked so well together and it’s really something extremely special..

i haven’t watched a kdrama in awhile, but this was a really wonderful show to experience and i know i’m probably going to be thinking about it for ages losing sleep over how wonderful and tear-inducing it is aAA ..